Fan Fiction ❯ Soldier ❯ Soldier ( Chapter 1 )

“What do you mean you're leaving?” I asked somewhat vehemently, feeling jaded by his sudden change of heart.

 

He sighed, shrugging his shoulders. His act of nonchalance was a weak a façade, I saw right through but then he's never able to hide from me. “I mean in the morning I'm leaving for Iraq. They want us back.”

 

I stared at him, caught between anger and tears. I had just gotten him back from the marines, from the government and now they want to take him away again. “They don't need you. You've already been gone for almost two years, Daren.”

 

Again he tried to mask his face but his anguish showed plainly in his eyes. “Winter, you know I follow orders.”

 

Damn it. He used my Indian name unlike most of my friends and it made this conversation all the more harder. I was his Winter and when he spoke my name no matter what the time, it sent shivers up my spine. “Fuck orders.” I turned away from him, hugging myself. If he couldn't give me comfort, I'd try to make my own. “You could have died last time.”

 

He touched my shoulder tentatively. Perhaps he thought I would withdraw from his touch or pull away from him because in all honesty I felt betrayed. Maybe not deceived by him but let down by somebody. “But I didn't. I came home to you.” He tried to sound reassuring.

 

This time I faced him looking directly into his green eyes with my own brown ones, bright from unshed tears, I touched his face as timidly as he had touched me, “Daren, can you even begin to imagine what it was like to wake up every morning in a cold bed.”

 

He opened his mouth to reply that he knew exactly what it was like but I cut him with a short chopping gesture with my hand. “To spend everyday wondering if one of the casualties reported on the news was the man you loved. Before you say it, I understand that you woke in a foreign country not knowing what your day was going to bring but you have to understand something.” I pulled my hand from his face, clutching it to my breast. “I'm completely helpless.”

 

“Winter, you will never be helpless.” He said, a ghost of a smile playing on his face.

 

I faced him, my face still serious, daring him to mock me. “You don't know what it is to be a woman.” I touched my stomach, splaying fingers across her abdomen. “How can you go when a child is due in seven months?”

 

Daren stared at me open mouthed. It was not how I wanted to tell him but it was too late now. “Oh God.” He wrenched his eyes shut, not touching me anymore. “So you will use this against me?”

 

“What?” I asked shock. Now I stared open mouthed. “You . . . bastard. I tell you this so you will know that you are going to be a father while you are in some foreign fucking country.”

 

Daren grimaced, “I'm sorry, Winter. I just . . .” He sighed drawing me into his arms. Putting his chin on the top of my head, he rocked me back and forth. “I don't want to leave, Winter. Never for a second, think that I want to leave you but I have no choice. I made an oath, a vow.”

 

I bit a back a sob that threatened to break free of my throat. “I know, Daren, I know. It's just so hard without you.”

 

He kissed the top of my head gently, face lingering in my hair. It tickled as he spoke but I relished in it for moments like this were soon going to be taken away from me. “It is my duty, Winter.” He sighed once more. “My duty as a soldier.”