InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Stolen Soul ❯ Blindness and Sight ( Chapter 9 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Author's Note: After writing this chapter, I can state with assurance that I officially hate writing Sango and Miroku. I'm not sure why. But I apologize if they seem OOC in this chapter. I'll include them in the story as little as possible, though they have a couple of minor purposes to serve in the plot.

Thanks: Again, I must offer many enthusiastic thanks to those who have reviewed! I tend to be very hard on myself when I'm writing, and so every bit of feedback has the power to really keep me going. :)

New Japanese Terms: Only one new one this chapter.
kitsune -- Literally, this just means "fox," but in Japan foxes are traditionally believed to have supernatural powers such as the ability to change shape, so in this setting you might translate it something like a "fox spirit" or "fox demon." Shippo is a young kitsune.

Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me. This fic, however, is mine. Please don't take it without my permission.

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Chapter 9
Blindness and Sight

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Kagome ... was she really here? Or was it just another dream?

It was difficult to think. Inu-Yasha's mind was cloudy, as if his thoughts were rising up through some thick fog of confusion. He'd felt this way before ... always after times when he'd lost a lot of blood. Given how confused his mind was, he figured he must be pretty bad off.

I remember ... fighting Koga ... and then Kagome ...

Struggling to remain conscious, Inu-Yasha forced his eyes open, though they were so heavy that his lids lifted only enough to show him a sliver of the world outside his head.

"You are awake, Inu-Yasha. This is good news." It was the old woman, Kaede. He tried to turn toward her voice, to open his eyes wider, but his body did not cooperate, instead only sending a tearing pain through his neck, causing him to gasp ... but even that small motion of his throat served to increase the pain. Inu-Yasha closed his eyes again and lay still, flat on his back, and tried to slow his breathing, for even his panting in response to the pain made things worse.

"Your injuries are severe. You were very nearly killed, and so you must take the time to heal before attempting to move about. You have lost a great deal of blood, and your throat is gravely wounded."

Inu-Yasha slit his eyes open again, and saw the old woman, who had moved to put herself within his range of sight. He was grateful. She pressed a moist cloth to his face, gently washing his cheeks and forehead, and he closed his eyes again.

"K-" he began to say, but excruciating pain exploded in his throat, and the syllable was sharply truncated.

"Do not try to speak, Inu-Yasha, for you shall only worsen the injury to your throat. You must give the wound time to heal."

But Inu-Yasha whispered softly, almost only a breath of air, "Kagome?"

"Kagome is safe, Inu-Yasha, as safe as is possible for her to be. But she has gone. I am sure she would have wished to stay to make sure you recovered well, but ... I believe she was forced to leave, to protect herself." Kaede continued wiping his face with her cool wet cloth as she spoke, and it felt surprisingly comforting. Her voice was somber as she continued, "It appears that Kagome's soul still has the ability to draw itself together, and so, now that Kikyo possesses and controls the larger portion ... Kagome was forced to go, or face losing the small amount of soul Kikyo's body still retains."

Inu-Yasha lay still and silent, allowing Kaede to move on to carefully examining his other wounds. Kikyo ... did you truly cast this spell yourself? Did you steal Kagome's body ... on purpose? But ... why would you harm Kagome? She is innocent in this! Kikyo ... have you changed so much? You were once so kind, so pure and noble ... Kikyo, do you hate me so very much?

He did not sense Kikyo's presence in the hut. Had she left? Had she ... No ... she wouldn't go after Kagome, would she? Gods ... no!

Suddenly panicked, Inu-Yasha clenched Kaede's hand in his own, causing water to squeeze from the cloth she held, his claws biting into her skin. "Where?" he gasped desperately, slitting his eyes open again to peer intently at the old woman's face. "Where?" With his repetition of the word, Inu-Yasha's throat spasmed, causing him to cough, flecks of blood appearing on his lips.

"Inu-Yasha! You must calm yourself or you will tear your wound more gravely! Rest assured that Kagome is safe. She has gone with the wolf prince, whom you know shall do her no harm. And Kikyo remains here. She is outside." In truth, since his transformation, Kikyo had expressed silent but obvious disgust at the sight of Inu-Yasha, and so had taken to walking in the countryside as much as possible to keep herself away from the hut. She had refused to assist with Inu-Yasha's care, and remained aloof from even Kaede.

Koga? Kagome went with Koga? That flea-bitten windbag? He couldn't keep her safe from a kitsune, let alone someone more powerful -- not Kikyo! not Kikyo! please not Kikyo! -- so why would she go with him? And right after he tried to kill me! Not that he could have, of course, because he's too much of a conceited weakling for that. But, still, he was attacking me, and apparently she just ran into his arms afterward, while I was unconscious! Why is she always forgiving him for everything, then getting all pissed off at me for nothing at all? Stupid bitch. She's got less brains than an ant. Koga! Hrmph! That tail-wagging bastard, always sweet-talking her ... and she's just stupid enough to fall for it, too.

Instinctively, a growl started low in his throat, but again the sound was abruptly cut off by the pain it caused. Stupid fucking throat!

Still, no matter how much she forgave Koga, Kagome had never actually just left with him before ... at least, not voluntarily. She'd never just picked up and took off with Koga without even waiting to make sure Inu-Yasha wasn't going to croak.

She must have been pretty damned scared, then. Because Inu-Yasha knew Kagome, and she wouldn't just leave like that, not without a damned good reason.

Could Kikyo have really been drawing the soul out of her? Maybe it wasn't on purpose, like when Kagome drew back the soul after that Urasue bitch first raised Kikyo. Kagome hadn't been trying to pull the soul out of Kikyo ... it just ... happened. Right? Because Kagome would never do that on purpose.

But ... would Kikyo?

Would Kikyo really do that? Have I been so blind?

Was Koga ... was Koga right? That damned bastard! He said ... the last thing I remember is him saying ... that this was like ... rape. Inu-Yasha's mind shied away from the word, his body tensing, leading Kaede to murmur as she continued to treat his wounds. If Kikyo really did this on purpose -- surely she didn't! -- but if she did ... if she stole Kagome's body, if she took it and used it against Kagome's will ... then ... it ... it is like she raped Kagome...

And I just let her do it.

Gods! What must Kagome think? No wonder she went with Koga! I wasn't there to protect her. If I'd been there ... if I hadn't chased those damned soul skimmers ... if I wasn't always so fucking quick to run off to find Kikyo ... then Kagome would be fine right now ... she would never have gotten hurt. Instead, she's ... she ... what must she be going through? Gods! ... Kagome, Kagome ... do you hate me now, too? I'm so sorry!

Kaede raised a clean, wet cloth to Inu-Yasha's lips and squeezed gently so that a small amount of liquid seeped into his mouth. He was extremely thirsty, and so attempted to swallow, despite the pain it caused.

"I am giving you a tea to help you sleep, to give your body time to heal itself." Inu-Yasha tried to shake his head, to object, but the old woman spoke again. "You spoke before of recurring dreams you had been experiencing, dreams of Kagome. I told you then that it is possible for two hearts to be linked, just as souls can be linked." Kaede squeezed some more liquid into his parched mouth, and though he did not want to sleep he swallowed gratefully, his throat burning with the movement, his thirst even more pressing than the pain.

Kaede's voice had grown more gentle as she told Inu-Yasha, "If your heart is linked to Kagome's, then it is possible that she has been reaching out to you, whether she realizes it or not. And so you should sleep, Inu-Yasha, and if your throat has healed somewhat when you wake, tell me of your dreams, and we shall consider their meaning."

Comforted by the miko's suggestion, Inu-Yasha lay still and allowed the fog to rise again in his mind, soothing the pain and urging him to sleep.

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Kagome reached up a hand to gently caress his cheek. "I'm going to have to leave, Inu-Yasha. I'm sorry. I can't help it. It'll be soon now." Her gentle scent surrounded him, and he drew her into his lungs as if she were air. In truth, she was more precious to him than air, more necessary to him than breath.

Her palm lay flat along the side of his face, cradling his cheek with her soft warmth. He wanted to lean into that warmth, wanted to wrap himself in that unconditional acceptance he had been searching for his whole life. He wanted to turn his face and press a kiss to her smooth palm. He wanted to hold her close to him and never let her go, never let her leave him. But his voice wouldn't work. He couldn't ask her to stay, couldn't beg her not to leave him, to never leave him, to stay with him always.

She smiled softly, her gray eyes sweet and sincere. "But I do love you, Inu-Yasha. And so you'll always be in my heart. Because that's what love is."

* * *

The next time Inu-Yasha woke, he heard familiar voices talking nearby. Kaede was speaking with Sango and Miroku, who seemed to have returned only recently. The elderly miko was telling them about recent events, and they were asking numerous questions.

Once again struggling to move, Inu-Yasha found that some of his strength had returned. He was uncertain how long he had been sleeping, but he was now able to struggle to a sitting position, though his neck did throb painfully with his movements.

"Inu-Yasha!" chided Kaede immediately. "You are still not healed, and if you move about too freely, your wound may re-open, endangering your life again."

But Inu-Yasha used the wall to assist him in coming to a standing position, his face grim and determined. "Kagome," he rasped painfully, looking about for Tetsusaiga.

Sango stepped forward to stand before him. "Kagome would not want for you to endanger your life like this, Inu-Yasha, when you have been so badly injured. She is safe. Shippo and Kirara and I are going to travel to Koga's cave to see her, so we will bring back word as soon as we can."

Inu-Yasha shook his head in frustration, but the movement set his neck wound to bleeding again, the red showing bright through the bandage. The pain was sharp, and Inu-Yasha's mind swam again. Did Kaede give me more of that damned tea while I was asleep?

Stumbling, Inu-Yasha nearly fell, but Miroku quickly stepped forward to support part of his weight, lowering him carefully to sit on the floor, and then to lie flat again. The hanyou's facial expression left little doubt as to his mood, and curses shone in his eyes even if they were not spoken aloud.

Sango came to sit beside Inu-Yasha as he became increasingly drowsy. I knew it! It's that damned tea! Stupid old hag!

"Inu-Yasha, I feel I must tell you something before we go. Something ... which Kagome told me in confidence before all of this happened, but which I believe you should know."

Inu-Yasha fought the growing fog in his mind, watching Sango's face intently. "What is it?" he croaked, coughing horribly for a moment after speaking the words. Afterward, there was blood in his mouth, but Kaede knowingly pressed a cloth to his lips, which came away red. With her one eye, she glared at him with a disapproving protectiveness. But Inu-Yasha ignored her and looked back to Sango. She had something to tell him about Kagome.

Looking down at her hands briefly, Sango hesitated before glancing cautiously at the doorway to the hut and then saying quietly, "Kikyo has tried to kill Kagome in the past, when she stole the unfinished jewel." Sango looked at Inu-Yasha's face and saw the confusion and hurt expressed there. "Kagome did not tell you, Inu-Yasha, because she knew of your feelings for Kikyo. She did not want to force you to choose."

Choose? The word resonated inside Inu-Yasha's mind. He remembered something from his dreams, something about choosing, about needing to choose, or not wanting to choose. "Inu-Yasha, I never want you to have to choose."

"I am sorry, Inu-Yasha, to tell you such news when you are injured, but I felt that you should know before I leave. Given what Kaede has told us regarding Kikyo's ability to draw on Kagome's soul, it seemed ... important." The young woman stood then, and offered Inu-Yasha a small apologetic smile. "We shall go to find Kagome, then. I am sure she would like to know that you are recovering from your wounds. And we shall bring back word quickly."

As Sango stepped out of the way, Kaede rushed forward and began preparing to re-dress Inu-Yasha's torn neck and throat, trusting that her herbal medicines would help him to sleep and feel less pain.

And as Inu-Yasha's head grew more and more clouded, thoughts flitted through his head.

Kikyo ... it really was you ... you tried to kill Kagome ... you stole her body ... Kikyo ... has your hatred for me changed you so much? Have you become so cold? Have you become so ... evil? Kikyo? How can I protect someone who ... how can I ... how could you do such things?


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To Be Continued

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