InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Heart Has Many Rooms ❯ Part I ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: Inuyasha and company belong to Rumiko Takahashi, etc, etc.

A/N- Not your typical "Naraku-defeated-we-all-live-happy-ever-after" fic. Nope! Suki is making 'em work for it! *grin* I'm pretty sure that this is going to be a three-parter folks, so hang tight!

{:The Heart Has Many Rooms:}

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"I've decided to go with Kouga."

Inuyasha's head snapped up, Kagome's words jolting him from his reverie. His jaw went slack and a tightness formed in his chest, curling around his lungs so that he found it hard to breathe. "What?" He asked softly, unable to keep the complete and utter disbelief out of his tone. Perhaps he'd heard wrong?

Kagome sighed and kneeled down in the grass, facing the Goshinboku where Inuyasha had currently been resting. "I'm going with Kouga-kun."

It had been a month since the Shikon no Tama was finally completed. After a grueling and demanding battle they'd defeated Naraku and his creations, piecing together the shards he'd held with theirs. Kagome had purified the Tama, and then bestowed it upon Inuyasha. He had, of course, immediately given it back, claiming that he no longer wished to use it. So Kagome then became the indisputable guardian of the jewel.

It was then that they'd realized that the well, the well which linked Kagome's world to the Sengoku Jidai, was sealed. Indefinitely. They'd tried. Kaede, Kagome, and even Miroku had tried to unseal the well with their combined holy power, but the well remained closed off. Kagome was stuck in the era of the Warring States. There had been tears, yes, but surprisingly Kagome took it quite well. She'd said that she might have been more upset if the well had been sealed from the other side, trapping her in her own time. She'd said that it must have been meant to be. That she belonged in the Sengoku Jidai.

Gods, did Inuyasha love hearing her say that.

Then, a few days ago, Kouga had made camp on the outskirts of Inuyasha's forest. Kagome had belligerently insisted that they not fight, now that they'd finally entered a time of peace. Both youkai had reluctantly agreed, after much debate. Kouga had then made Kagome an offer. Become his mate, help him increase the numbers in his pack, and she would rule by his side. Naturally, Inuyasha had a rude response to that. But Kagome had told him to wait, that she would give him an answer after thinking over it long and hard.

And today... today they had seen the eerie glow that settled over the forest. A glow that could be caused by none other than Kikyou's Shinidamachuu. So Inuyasha had gone to meet with her, as such would be natural. There, Kikyou had told him she was finally ready. Ready to take him with her, down into the depths of hell. But Inuyasha had told her to wait, that he would need time to tie up loose ends.

What he really needed time for was to choose between what tore his heart in two. He'd sat down, with his back resting against the Goshinboku, to think. To think and to make the inevitable choice.

Kikyou or Kagome?

And here Kagome knelt in front of him, declaring that she was abandoning him for that wolf and saving him from making the choice. "You're what?!" Inuyasha seethed, feeling his hands involuntarily fist themselves in the tough fabric of his hakama.

"You heard me." Kagome stuck out her chin in mild defiance.

Inuyasha's eyes narrowed and his mouth turned downward in a fierce scowl. "Like hell you're going with that yaze ookami!"

Kagome sighed and lifted a hand to rub at her temple. "Inuyasha... it's my own decision to make." She replied, and Inuyasha could hear the exhaustion and world-weariness behind those words.

"I'm not going to let you go! You're..." He trailed off. Mine. He was going to finish, but his throat had closed and would not let him get the word out.

"Inuyasha..." Kagome's hand found itself cupping Inuyasha's cheek and stroking it softly. "I understand that you need to fulfill your promise to Kikyou."

Inuyasha's eyes warmed to a deep amber. "Kagome, I-"

She cut him off, continuing her own explanation. "And you must understand that I will need someone to protect me when you are gone. As well as the Shikon no Tama." He glanced down at the jewel that hung from her neck.

It looks so heavy...

"Kouga-kun can give me that, Inuyasha." Kagome carried on, meeting his gaze with gentle, azure orbs. "Protection, companionship, a family..." She paused.

"Love."

It was whispered so softly, that Inuyasha wasn't certain if he'd imagined it or not. But then Kagome's stare had dipped down to his mouth, lingering there for a long moment, before falling away to stare at the ground.

"But Miroku and Sango... Shippou, Kirara... they could protect you, Kagome." He argued, knowing already that he couldn't win this one.

Kagome's eyes met his again, this time gleaming with barely concealed exasperation. "Inuyasha, you know as well as I do that even they couldn't protect me from youkai with strength like Kouga. And I want them to live a normal life and be happy. I want Miroku and Sango to get married and have lots of children. I want Shippou to have a proper home where he doesn't need to pack up in the morning and travel for the whole day, wondering if he'll even have time for six hours of restless sleep. I want everyone to not have to worry about..." She grasped the jewel with her hands, pressing it to her chest as if to protect it, like one would a child.

Inuyasha suddenly felt a wave of sympathy and guilt come crashing down on his shoulders. "Kagome, you don't need to do this alone."

She smiled softly. "It's my burden, Inuyasha. And I won't be alone, really. I'll have Kouga-kun, won't I?"

It was as if Kikyou had fired another arrow into his heart. To think of Kagome's future with Kouga. Imagining her embracing him after bringing home the night's meal, telling their children stories of her adventures before tucking them into bed, seeing her laughing and giggling with bright eyes that shone with adoration for her new family.

Seeing her loving him. Loving Kouga. Replacing Inuyasha in her life.

And it hurt. It hurt like nothing he'd ever felt before. Not even the pain and betrayal that Kikyou had caused him could hold a candle to this kind of heartbreak.

"You need to put Kikyou's soul to rest." Kagome said, after a moment of silence. "And I know that she'll only go to hell if you are with her."

He just stared at her with golden pools of emotion, feeling the twinge behind his nose and the sting in his eyes that signaled the beginnings of tears. He blinked them away quickly.

"So, Inuyasha..." Kagome leaned forward, looping her arms around his neck and enfolding him in a tight embrace. She rested her chin on his crown and her mouth against his ear, warm breath causing it to twitch while she murmured soothing words that weren't of any real language. They sat like that for a moment or two, until Kagome suddenly broke the rosary around Inuyasha's neck, causing beads to haphazardly plummet to the ground with in a chorus of soft thumps. "I set you free."

Inuyasha stared at her dumbly as she pulled away, folding the remains of the rosary into his palm and closing it firmly. "Go, Inuyasha. Go with Kikyou." He didn't fail to notice single tear that leaked out of her eye and traveled the curve of her cheek, before she hastily wiped it away.

"Kagome..." He couldn't seem to get any farther than that.

"Inuyasha, please understand. I want you to be happy as well." She turned her head down, hiding behind her hair, but he could see the few tears that fell from her under her bangs to wet her hands and skirt. "And if you can't be happy, then at least at peace."

Kagome rose to her feet, still averting her eyes from Inuyasha. He stumbled to his feet as well reaching out for her hand and grasping her firmly by the wrist, when she turned to run away.

"Inuyasha..." Kagome turned her head upward, displaying the abundance of tears that streamed down her face. Inuyasha was so taken aback that he let go of her hand. "Don't do this to me..." She whispered, lip trembling slightly.

"Do what?" He asked in confusion, not entirely sure what she meant by 'this'.

Kagome drew in a calming breath and turned away from Inuyasha's probing gaze once again. "Go. Just... go with Kikyou." She twisted out of his way when he reached out to grab her again and took a step backward.

"Goodbye, Inuyasha." Were her last words before she turned her back on him and headed toward the edge of the forest, where Kouga waited under an impatient moon.

****

Kikyou waited for him at the opposite boundary of the forest.

"Inuyasha. You came." Kikyou stated as he came into view. "I was not certain if you would still honor our promise."

Inuyasha stood in front of her, meeting her gaze and probing her eyes for any sign of emotion. He found none. "I swore to you, Kikyou, that I would follow you into hell. I would not break such a vow."

Kikyou smiled, but there was no warmth behind it. "I thought that maybe you would rather be with my incarnation."

"Kagome has found someone else." He replied, and dipped his head down so she could not read his expression.

But Kikyou could not be fooled. "And this upsets you?"

Inuyasha set his jaw and tried to remove all emotion from his countenance. "It does not matter."

"Ah, but maybe it does." Kikyou mused, thoughtfully lifting a finger to her frozen lips. "Perhaps it would be better for me to leave you here, where you would live, heartbroken, while she loved another before your eyes."

Inuyasha's eyes widened. "Kikyou?" He stared at her with incredulity.

"Would you be able to live like that, Inuyasha? Seeing your love's heart stolen by another?" She went on callously, reaching out an icy hand to caress the side of his face. He flinched away at the coldness of her touch.

"And would that make you happy, Kikyou?" Inuyasha spat in disgust, eyes growing hard.

Kikyou laughed coolly. "I'm afraid I don't have the liberty of happiness anymore, Inuyasha. But do you not think it would be what you deserved?" She gauged his expression before continuing.

"After all, it is no more than what you've done to me."

And it that moment the world froze around them. The night stilled and all signs of life became nonexistent. Inuyasha sucked in a hard breath, trying to keep his mind from reeling. "What are you talking about?"

"Come now, Inuyasha." Kikyou's eyes bore into his, as if she were searching his soul. "Do you think me that dense?"

Inuyasha shifted uncomfortably under her piercing gaze. "I'm not sure what you mean, Kikyou."

"She had taken my place in your heart." Kikyou replied, after a beat of silence. "You love her... more than you ever loved me, I am sure."

"Kikyou..." He looked at her in a mixture of shock and sympathy. "No one could ever take your place."

She shrugged. "So you say. But you cannot deny the fact that you love her."

Inuyasha took a step back to view the undead miko in full perspective. Kikyou, the woman to which he owed the debt of his life. The woman who had once owned his heart. But that had been long ago.

"No, I can't."

Kikyou frowned suddenly. "So then, you are here only out of... obligation? Is that so?"

"Kikyou, I still care for you. I will still die for you, if that is what you wish." Inuyasha sighed heavily, letting his shoulders slump down in weariness.

"But you cannot love me." It was more of a statement then a question.

"I do love you, Kikyou." Inuyasha spoke softly, and reached out for her hand, enfolding it in his own. "Just not in the same way I once did."

Confusion filled Kikyou's gaze. "I'm afraid I do not understand."

Inuyasha smiled, but it was a small and muted expression. "I can't love you the same way, Kikyou. The Kikyou I loved that way died over fifty years ago."

Kikyou squeezed his hand gently. "I believe I could say the same for you. You've changed much." She pulled her hand from his grip. "I fear that I no longer know you."

"You don't, Kikyou." He stepped forward and embraced the miko, sliding his arms around her waist in an awkward hug. "You don't know me at all."

Kikyou sighed and rested her head against his shoulder. "Inuyasha..."

"Yes, Kikyou?"

"I will release you from your promise." She pulled herself from his embrace. "Because you are not the same Inuyasha that once gave me his word."

The ground beneath the Kikyou began to glow, slowly turning from a pale blue before erupting into a brilliant, vivid cobalt light than bathed the whole clearing in tremendous luminosity.

"Thank you... Kikyou." Inuyasha gave her a sad smile, which she returned.

"Goodbye, Inuyasha." Were her last words before the ground swallowed her whole, leaving Inuyasha alone in the thick of the forest, bathed in the glow of a lonely moon.

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So, what did everyone think? The next part will be up soon... I think. *sweatdrop*