Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Fishcakes & Ramen ❯ Revenge Pt. I: Kiba's Itch ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Title: Fishcakes & Ramen
Summary: Hidden Leaf Academy was the most prestigious school in the district where the instructors were all award-winning teachers from all over the world. The school was built on 76-acres of lush Hidden Leaf land in which the students occupy forty-four school buildings; including three libraries and learning centers; computer areas and language labs, a physical education facility, and an art facility for grades K-12. Then, through a special “No Kid Left Behind” program, the school admitted several lucky kids into their school for free. As soon as that was done, the school status crumbled. They all blamed it on the special transfer student who smelled like fishcakes and ramen.
Genre: Humor/Friendship
Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto, I WANT to own Shikamaru<3 I have a newfangled respect for him (& Kiba too) I certainly don’t want to own Orochimaru though. That guy seriously doesn’t need to take his sexual frustrations out on poor boys from Konoha. First he tries for Itachi and now Sasuke? Dude, c’mon…
A/N:Here’s chapter 4! I’ve noticed that people have added this on their favorites and yet, no reviews -- which kinda sucks but it’s ok. I’ll be patient. (:
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“I’ve spotted the location of our target.” Haku spoke calmly into the mic of his ear piece as he continued to spy on Kiba from behind a small creak in the doorway. “He’s in the planetarium dome behind language Lab A. Do you read me Baby Dick?” he nearly snorted, trying to suppress his laugh.

“I read ya…” Naruto replied, grimly into his mic. “Why do I have to be called ‘Baby Dick’? Why not another code name?” he whined, causing Haku to smirk. Sai scoffed. “Our code names have to match us.” he explained. Naruto whimpered in irritation. “Then how come you guys don’t have any code names?” he began listing reasons on how they had always been treating him unfairly.

“It’s been like this ever since!” he complained, violently kicking the doorknob off the handle of a door that Naruto assumed to be a classroom. For a moment, they were all silent. And then Naruto could hear Sai and Haku snickering quietly on the other end of the line. “What’s so funny about expressing my feelings?! I thought you guys were supposed to be my friends!” he growled, waving his arms uncontrollably in the air.

“It’s been like this ever since? That doesn’t make any sense! We’ve only met earlier today.” Haku reminded. Naruto flushed red. “Well ‘earlier today’ was a long time ago, now shut up and keep waiting until me and Sai get to the planetarium!” he growled and switched his mic off.

Sai quietly chuckled to himself as he left the art facility. “Hey, Haku. While you’re waiting, put on the skirt.” he nearly snorted. Haku huffed. “Curse my pretty face.” he clutched his cheek firmly and pulled out a skirt that he had stolen from a girl in the locker room. Haku looked around, scanning the area for people and made sure that no one would be able to watch him change out of his pants and into a skirt.

He huffed and quickly pulled his pants down, though, he had quite some trouble pulling his feet out from the tight seams of his jeans. He flung his pants off a few feet away with a flick of his right foot and steadily pulled the skirt up around his waist. Haku sighed, wiping the sweat off his forehead and reached under his skirt to adjust his underwear when-

“Wait!” a raspy voice whispered, not too far behind him.

Haku slowly turned around and nearly jumped back in shock. “Lemme’ see your underwear.” Naruto’s face was concentrated. Haku had never seen Naruto with such an expression; but then again, he had only met Naruto earlier during the day. Without questioning him, Haku slowly pulled his skirt down, revealing just a peek of what was underneath. Naruto narrowed his eyes. “Sir Ulrich von…Lichtenstein the third…” he read off of the waistband of Haku’s underwear; his face of concentration twisted into confusion. “Who the hell is that?”

Haku mumbled a few curse words under his breath before he replied. “My step-dad gives me brand name underwear.” he admitted. Naruto watched Haku adjust his skirt according to how Sai said it should look like and then he threw Haku a thumbs up. “You’re dad’s so awesome!” he said, in awe.

A rustling of leaves were heard not too far from behind Naruto and the two boys turned to see Sai making his entrance, his hand planted firmly on his hips as he waltzed towards the two. “So it seems the dog-boy likes taking baby naps in the planetarium.” Sai shifted his gaze to Haku and nodded slightly. “You know what to do, hm?”

Haku nodded in response and fixed his hair, reluctantly trying to look more feminine. Naruto covered his mouth, trying to muffle out the sound of his snickers. Haku threw him a dirty glare and walked quietly inside, making his way towards Kiba, carefully. Haku paused and analyzed the rising of Kiba’s shoulders as he slept.

“He’s sleeping!” Haku shouted in a whisper at his two friends observing at the doorway. Sai and Naruto each cocked their heads in unison and turned to one another with puzzled faces. They gave each other knowing looks and nodded.

They cupped their hands around their mouths and barked as loud as they could, causing Haku to flinch. “What the fuck?!” Haku nearly fell onto Kiba and he looked around frantically for a good place to hide.

“Huh?!” Kiba had already woken up, a hint of sleep was still caught in his eyes, but he’d already realized that Haku was standing next to him. “Who the hell are you?!” Kiba barked, wiping the drool off the corners of his lips. Haku inwardly cursed to himself and sneaked a glance towards the door where Sai and Naruto had been standing, only to find that they had scrambled away from the premises.

Haku sighed and gave Kiba a loving look. Kiba flinched, a streak of red graced his cheeks. “I’m sorry to bother you. I was just curious as to what this place was.” Haku explained. “May I know your name?”

Kiba grinned and scratched the back of his head. “I’m Kiba Inuzuka and,” he pulled a small white puppy from the hood of his jacket and presented him to Haku. “This is my dog, Akumaru.” Akumaru calmly sniffed the air surround Haku and barked as if accepting him.

“So what’s yours?” Kiba asked, setting Akumaru down and shifted a seat to the side, allowing Haku to sit next to him. Haku smiled sweetly and made himself comfortable in the seat that Kiba had slept in, considering that it was now warm and smelled like wet dog, Haku gladly accepted anyway.

“I’m Haruka Kamui.” Haku finally introduced himself, blurting out the first girly name he could think of at the time. Kiba wiped his nose with the back of his hand and bared his teeth with a wide grin. “Nice name.” he complimented. “So, Haruka. Why haven’t I seen you around here before?” he questioned.

“I’m the other program transfer student.” he replied, casually. Haku could hear Naruto and Sai chuckling from his ear piece; he was about to storm out of the planetarium to smack those two unconscious if it hadn’t been for Sai, who slapped Naruto and demanded him to ‘shut the hell up, baby dick’

Haku chuckled under his breath, completely forgetting that he was supposed to pretend to be a girl. Kiba arched a brow. “Hey, are you sick or something?” he asked, leaning over to examine Haku’s face. Haku shook his head nervously. “I’m fine, Kiba. No need to worry.” he smiled, reassuring him that everything was ok. Akumaru whimpered, trying to gain his master’s attention. Kiba cocked his head to the side and scooped his dog and brought him onto his lap. “What’s wrong Akumaru?”

“It seems that your friend has fleas.” Haku exclaimed and circled his finger along the palm of his hand before dropping an herbal cream into his palm. “Here. For Akumaru.” he smiled politely as Kiba glanced at Haku in awe. “Geez, thanks, Haruka.” he clutched Haku’s gift tightly and sniffed. “You’re a good friend.”

“So are you.” Haku added and kissed Kiba on both cheeks. “Thank you, Kiba.” he stated and stood up, leaving a shocked Kiba and a clueless Akumaru behind.
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Haku nearly broke his legs, quickening his pace, trying to leave Kiba as fast as he could before he could call out after him. And finally, he was outside, greeted with two faces that he really wanted to punch. “Screw you guys, I almost died in there.” Haku growled, changing out of the skirt and into his regular attire. Naruto snickered. “That was pretty easy, huh? All you did was act like yourself!” he raised his hand, as if he was going to slap Haku playfully on the shoulder.

Haku flinched. Naruto swung his hand and narrowly missed Haku’s shoulder; instead, he slapped his knee playfully. Haku narrowed his eyes and groaned. Naruto laughed even louder, seeing that he had made Haku flinch. “You thought I was going to slap you, didn’t you?” and he repeated the same gesture, which in turn, earned him a punch from Haku’s fist.

Sai folded his arms over his chest and cleared his throat. “So did you get the skin pigment cream on his face?” he questioned. Haku nodded and shuddered. “Yeah. Both sides of his cheeks.” he spat at Naruto’s feet and wiped his lips in pure disgust. “His cheeks should be having an allergic reaction by tomorrow.” Sai exclaimed with a tone of excitement and patted Naruto and Sai on the back as a job well done. “Good improvisation, Haku.” he smiled, sweetly and turned to Naruto.




“Nice work, Baby Penis.”