Supernatural Fan Fiction ❯ Zhai'helleva, Ashke ❯ Down Will Come Baby ( Chapter 1 )

Chapter 1

 

Sharing with us what he knows,

Shining eyes are big and blue,

And all around him, water flows.

This world to him is new.

This world to him is new.

 

Sammy always had the biggest eyes, and from the time of his birth he could do this thing with them—this thing where he seemed to look right through you and see your every thought But then he would make them all wide and innocent and he'd smile his little-baby smile and you would just forget how much they creeped you out.

 

Sammy was also abnormally curious. If his tiny little body hadn't demanded it, he probably would have foregone sleep entirely in favor of staring around at the whole world for days on end.

 

Mary Winchester was incredibly proud of these traits, and older brother Dean was fond of telling anyone who would listen that “Daddy says Sammy's gonna be the smartest kid in the class when he goes to school!”

 

He wasn't wrong.

 

What he was wrong about was the reaction to it.

 

To touch a face,

To kiss a smile,

New eyes see no race.

The essence of a child,

The essence.

 

Sammy's curiosity persisted even in the wake of the horror of Mary's death, because of course he had no idea what had happened to change his young life forever. By the age of two he was toddling all over the place, picking up everything he could get his hands on. More often than not the inclination got him into trouble, but stayed with him anyways.

 

As he underwent the transformation from Sammy to Sam, though, the curiosity became more restrained, mixed up with rebellion and just general teen angst. Ironically, it also became yet another excuse for the growing-more-frequent fights between him and John, because it got Sam into the habit of asking questions—an undesirable quirk that Dean had somehow managed to shake somewhere around the age of twelve.

 

Sam's teenage years were a thousand little skirmishes all strung together in one big battle as he fought his way toward adulthood with wild abandon. He fought his war against the whole world, but the general of that enormous army—well, that unlucky title fell to John Winchester.

 

For years, Dean was careful to stay neutral, to not take sides. He was, perhaps, not so good at it as those infamous Swiss, and sometimes he slipped up, but this was a rare enough occurrence that he was usually able to keep both parties friendly with him at the end of the day.

 

But there comes a time in every war when things must begin coming to a head, and for the Winchesters it all started when Sam was fifteen.

 

He's born to shimmer, he's born to shine.

He's born to radiate.

He's born to live.

He's born to love.

But we will teach him not to hate.

 

All Sam's life, he hated killing.

 

He did it because he weighed human life against demon life, and found the former more important.

 

He did it, but he didn't like it.

 

On the night that his perception shifted, Sam was hunting with John and Dean. He wouldn't ever be able to remember what they were hunting—it didn't matter. That wasn't the point.

 

The point was that the big thing had a couple of little baby things with it, and Sam couldn't shoot any of them.

 

True love, it is a rock,

Smoothed over by a stream.

No ticking of a clock

Truly measures what that means,

Truly measures what that means.

 

The fight that came after was the worst any of them could remember, and they all came out of it distinctly ruffled. There were accusations flung from all sides, and, as always, John and Sam were completely content to blame each other and leave Dean out of it—which, actually, made him feel worse than if they'd declared the whole thing his fault.

 

It was impossible to say who “won”, because of course neither father nor son would concede defeat. However, both sides escaped without casualties, so Dean figured it was all gonna be okay.

 

He changed his mind before long.

 

And this thing they call our time,

Heard a brilliant woman say.

She said, “You know, it's crazy

How I want to capture mine.”

I think I love this woman's way.

I think I love this woman's…

 

Sam's junior year happened to fall into one of those rare, golden times when the Winchesters actually stayed in one place for more than a couple of weeks. John even found a fairly nice apartment to rent, with two bedrooms so that they weren't all stuffed into one place, and Sam even backed off the rebellious act when John consented to enroll him in the local high school.

 

Sam very rarely was able to go to one school for long. He was an incredibly smart person, so he'd never actually had to be held back, but hardly ever was he able to stay in one place long enough to make friends.

 

This time was different, though, because this school turned out to be where Sam would meet his downfall.

 

Way she shimmers, the way she shines,

The way she radiates,

The way she lives,

The way she loves,

The way she never hates.

 

Sam had never gotten a chance to fall in love before, but now that he had, he went head-over-heels, tumbling-to-the-bottom-of-the-mountain down. Having never been subject to the passions of his age, he proved more susceptible than most, and was soon swearing up and down that she was absolutely the most wonderful person ever to walk the earth.

 

There was a difference between Sam and most of his kind, though—his affection was actually returned, and it wasn't long before Sam had his first girlfriend.

 

Dean and John never actually met her, and in fact Sam never told anyone about her. But as these things often go, everyone from Dean to John to the students to Sam's trig teacher knew he was dating, and Sam knew they knew, but no one ever said a word about it. Instead, Dean went around with a smirk on his face, covertly mocking whenever he got the chance, and John remained impassive so that neither of his sons ever knew what he thought of it.

 

During his time with her, Sam became so easygoing and amiable that it was as if he'd went and gotten a whole new personality. He didn't argue with Dean, and he didn't fight with John.

 

Only thing was, he didn't want to fight much else, either.

 

Sometimes I think of all this that can surround me.

I know it all as being mine.

But she kisses me and wraps herself around me.
She gives me love, she gives me time,

And I feel fine.
I feel fine.

 

When Sam slipped up on a hunt for the third time, very nearly getting himself killed, John decided enough was enough.

 

And the next thing Sam knew, his bags were packed and the truck was loaded and he was folded into the passenger seat of Dean's Impala because he wouldn't have been able to handle any sort of proximity to John, and they were moving on.

 

It was the night before junior prom.

 

They already had their tickets.

 

And Sam never said goodbye.

 

But time, I cannot change.
So here's to looking back.

You know, I drink a whole bottle of my pride,

And I toast to change

To keep these demons off my back.

Just get these demons off my back.

 

It was a John Winchester Natural Reaction—watch son get gradually more distracted, see son nearly die, remove son from distracting situation—and not an entirely evil decision as such, but it still caused the entire world to shift on its axis.

 

The fight didn't come until they hit the next motel, but it didn't become lesser from being pent up—in fact, it seemed to cause the very walls to shake. Dean actually hid until it was over—first time ever. For what seemed like hours the place echoed with accusations and boiled with anger, and for a while it looked like it wouldn't end at all.

 

But then suddenly it did, and the motel room was absolutely silent, and Dean wished the shouting would start again, because to him where was a sound, and he could even put a name to it. Several, in fact.

 

Giving up.

 

Fragile things breaking.

 

The last thread snapping.

 

`Cause I want to shimmer, I want to shine.

I want to radiate.

I want to live.

I want to love.

I want to try to learn not to hate,

Try not to hate.

 

Mrs. Bedsworth of Francis Howell North High School was not having a good morning, and it wasn't looking up by one in the afternoon when someone knocked softly on her door.

 

She said to sit, and she'd help in a minute, facedown in a packed drawer of files. She heard a careful, measured tread on the carpet, and then the sound of someone dropping into a chair, but whoever it was didn't say a word, waiting patiently, and for that she was grateful.

 

After a minute, she pulled out the folder she'd been searching for, looked up—and smiled for the first time all day.

 

She looked at the young man sitting across from her and waited for him to come out with it, already knowing it had to be important. Sam Winchester had only been at North for a couple of weeks, but already he had a reputation as the handsome, quiet observer who didn't like to bother people.

 

Sam looked at her, and he seemed even more serious than usual—maybe that was how he showed nerves?

 

“I need you to help me get a full ride to Stanford University.”

 

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Author's Note: It was relevant, I swear. Doesn't look like it now, but the chapter—set-up though it was—did have a point. Sorry it took so long to come out—I get so little writing done nowadays, not because I don't want to, but because I don't have the time. You all probably understand, right? And are willing to be patient? Please?