InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Broken ❯ Broken ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: InuYasha and all the characters in the series belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I'm influenced by both manga and anime. My muse owns the rest of it, I suppose. After all, I'm just a tool.

 

Notes: While I classify this as a songfic, there is only one instance of lyrics within and they're a brief quote from Whisper, owned by Evanescence, who heavily influenced this fic. But it's not just one song, rather a blend of several, most notably My Immortal and Whisper.

 

Genre: Angst, Romance, Songfic

Rating: M

Codes: Inu/Kag

Feedback: Please, reviews beget more fiction!

 

 

Broken
Part 1

 

“I'll be back in two days!” Kagome called, waving. InuYasha pouted and refused to watch her go. Shippo waved back enthusiastically as she disappeared down the well. InuYasha leapt off into the forest, not looking back.

 

“How long do you think until he follows her?” Miroku asked Sango.

 

“I give it a day and a half,” she replied with a smile. Miroku smiled back and turned to Kaede's village, ready for the short break Kagome's trip home offered.

 

Two days passed and to InuYasha's credit, he didn't try to follow Kagome. But from dawn on the morning she was supposed to return, he was sitting next to the well, waiting. As morning turned into afternoon, Sango and Miroku came down from the village to wait with him. Shippo started trying to goad InuYasha into retrieving Kagome, since he missed her himself. InuYasha waited, though. As the afternoon grew old, however, he finally lost his patience.

 

“Damnit, woman, you said two days,” InuYasha growled down the well. “See if I ever wait like this again!” InuYasha jumped down the well and Miroku looked down when he heard a surprised `oomph'. InuYasha was sitting at the bottom of the well, looking back up at him.

 

“What happened?” Miroku called. Sango stepped up next to him and looked down. Kirara mewed from her shoulder and InuYasha jumped back up. He glared at the well and jumped down again. Once again, he was staring up from the bottom at them in confusion.

 

“It's broken,” InuYasha called up as he leapt to stand with them again.

 

“I guess we'll have to wait for Kagome to come through on her own,” Shippo said.

 

“If the well isn't working on this side, who is to say it's working on Kagome's?” Sango asked.

 

“Do you mean Kagome might not be coming back?” Miroku continued Sango's thought. Shock went through the group. Kagome, gone? InuYasha obviously wasn't willing to take that as an answer, as he jumped back in the well and started digging.

 

“Kagome!” he yelled, shoveling dirt with his claws. `Kagome, where are you? Come back!' he thought desperately, clawing at the earth.

 

In the present…
Kagome appeared in her own time and smiled. She glanced at the walls of the well, noticing a piece missing that she had noticed before. It looked like someone had gouged it with claws. She shuddered and just assumed it was one of the demons villagers had tossed into the well over the centuries. She climbed out of the well, looking forward to a nice, hot bath. Her only concern was passing classes and restocking her bag. Maybe getting a few presents for her friends in the feudal era. She had no idea that she wouldn't be going back… ever.

 

In the past…
InuYasha didn't leave the well that day, or the next, or the next. Every day was spent jumping down the well, then back out. He had a single-minded determination to get through. But he knew time wasn't on his side. Kagome's scent was all but gone from the well. After a week of exhausting effort, he lay at the bottom of the well, clawing at the side, digging gashes into it. “Kagome, where are you?” he whispered before lying his head down on the dirt floor. “Please, Kagome, come back. I'm sorry,” he whispered, clutching his hands into fists and falling asleep.

 

Miroku and Sango tried to get him to resume searching for jewel shards, but it was futile. InuYasha refused to leave the well. He was sleeping at the bottom at night, waiting for Kagome. Shippo wasn't much better, haunting the well every morning, asking if InuYasha had made it through. InuYasha never answered. He just started jumping in and out again, digging and occasionally screaming at the well and Kagome and life in general. Finally, one day, they came to the well and he was lying next to it, on his side and they ran to him, fearing he was dead. His eyes were open and blank, he was cold to the touch, but he was breathing. It was the only sign of life he showed.

 

“This is bad,” Miroku said, laying InuYasha back against the well. “Without InuYasha and Kagome, I doubt we will find Naraku any time soon, nor be able to defeat him.”

 

“I think you're right,” Sango agreed. “He has most of the sacred jewel and without Kagome to purify it…”

 

“Then I am doomed,” Miroku said, looking at his right hand. Sango reached out and touched his arm gently. He didn't look at her. “I must resume my quest from before,” he said.

 

“I think I can help you with that,” Sango said shyly. Miroku looked to her, startled. She was blushing and looking away. He reached out and touched her cheek, turning her to face him. He leaned in and kissed her, elated that she didn't stop him or slap him. When she kissed him back, he reached around and pulled her close.

 

“You know, I'm not dead,” InuYasha growled. “And I don't need to hear you two making Miroku's dreams come true.” They broke apart with a startled yelp, having forgotten the silent hanyo. Sango's blush deepened and Miroku scratched his head in embarrassment.

 

“Sorry about that,” Miroku said.

 

“Does that mean you'll help us find Naraku?” Sango asked. Miroku looked at her in horror, watching his chance for a family fly away on the wind.

 

“It doesn't matter,” InuYasha said. “I don't care about that now.” Miroku turned to InuYasha, no happier than he was before. He felt guilty for his moment of true selfishness. He had longed for what Sango was offering for so long, but for Naraku's death even longer. Still, when Sango pulled on his hand, he didn't stay to try to talk the hanyo out of his apathy. He followed her back to the village to talk to her about their marriage. Even as he planned everything in his head, his thoughts stayed with InuYasha at the well. He wondered if he would ever recover from this loss.

 

Present…
Kagome slid her shoes back on after school, glad to be rid of the school slippers. She smiled at Ayumi, who was waving at her. She grabbed her bag and caught up to her friends. Eri and Yuka grinned at her and she stopped. She knew that look…

 

“Hojo!” Yuka called, waving to the brown-haired boy. Hojo smiled and joined them. Kagome smiled at him and tried to get away as fast as possible. Thankfully, Hojo hadn't known she was back yet, so he didn't have a gift for her and she didn't have to know what strange disease her grandfather had given her this time. She was able to escape them rather quickly and made her way home. She was a block away, the shrine in sight, when the explosion hit. She had to clap her hands over her head and close her eyes. When she looked again, smoke rose from her home. She ran as fast as she could, terror clenching her chest and speeding her heart.

 

She saw her mother, lying on the steps to the shrine and she stopped. She helped her mother sit up, happy that she was okay. Then she stood and ran again, looking for her grandfather. She found him safely hiding behind InuYasha's Tree. She sighed with relief, and then went to see what had exploded. She walked to the well house, worried that InuYasha had come for her early and brought something bad with him. `It would just be like him,' she thought, getting angry. `He has no patience.' But when she got there, she knew that InuYasha wasn't there. In fact, nothing was there but rubble. She dropped her bag and stared in horror. The well was gone. She threw herself on the rubble and began digging, throwing piece after piece away, but she realized very soon that she was throwing sections of the well.

 

“No!” she screamed in horror. The remains of the house and its own stone foundation had filled the well. It was gone. She knelt in the debris and began crying. “I said I'd be back,” she whimpered. “You're making a liar out of me,” she told the well. She grabbed pieces and began throwing them until she came to a large rock with scratches in it. They looked familiar and that's when she realized it was the claw marks she had noticed earlier. She bit back a cry and dropped it. It wasn't just random scratches, there were words there: Kagome, come back. Kagome lifted the rock and touched the weathered scratches. They must have been very deep indeed for them to still be there. They had survived for five hundred years and all the times she had gone up and down the well, she had never bothered to read it.

 

Tears filled her eyes and her throat closed. A sob broke through and she clutched the slice of stone, letting the edges bite into her hands, scraping and cutting her fingers. “Inu…” she gasped, “Yasha…”

 

“Kagome?” Mrs. Higurashi's voice broke the moment of silence as Kagome fought her tears, unable to breathe. “Kagome!” she yelled, seeing her daughter's broken heart on her face, blood on the rock in her hands and the tears tracing clean trails through the dirt on her face.

 

“Mama!” Kagome cried, standing and running to her mother, burying her head against her shoulder and weeping. Her mother wrapped her arms around her and stroked her hair, making comforting noises.

 

“Kagome, what is it?” she asked.

 

“The well, it's gone. It's gone completely,” she choked. “I can't go back.” Kagome clutched her mother's shirt and bit back a particularly loud sob, her chest and shoulders wracking painfully.

 

“Kagome, Kagome-chan, don't worry,” her mother said, rubbing Kagome's shoulders. “We'll call in someone to dig it all the junk out. It will be okay.” She rubbed Kagome's back, holding the girl as she cried. Kagome heard her mother, but she knew it would be days, maybe even weeks before she would be able to go back. InuYasha already thought she had abandoned him, she could tell by what he had written. She stepped back and read the stone again. Her mother cocked her head so she could see. “What is that?” Kagome turned it for her mother to read. Mrs. Higurashi touched the stone. “Oh, Kagome,” she said, giving her daughter's shoulders a brief squeeze.

 

“He must have carved this very deeply or recently,” Kagome whispered hoarsely, “For it to still be here.” Kagome took the piece of stone in with her and set it on her desk, lied down on her bed and stared at it for hours, completely forgetting about her homework and school. That night, she cried herself to sleep as she imagined InuYasha at the bottom of the well, carving out his desperate message to her.

 

Past…

Shippo eventually left the well and InuYasha, who still went down it every day, scratching deeper into the stone and clawing at the earth in frustration. There was no feeling involved in it anymore, he was beyond feeling. He was just numb. Weeks passed with him alone and he finally left the well, not certain where to go or why, but knowing he couldn't spend the rest of his life waiting for Kagome. She wasn't coming back and he couldn't get to her.

 

Eventually, he had the thought that he would find Kikyo and tell her he was ready to go to Hell with her. He couldn't imagine it being worse than where he was now. So he tracked the scent of her mixed with graveyard soil, but what he found shattered the last shred of hope he had. He looked at the night sky, unable to bear the sight of her corpse.

 

“Kikyo… Kagome… why? Why did you leave me alone?” he asked the moon. It shone its cold light down on him and offered no answers.

 

Present…

“What do you mean, it will be two months?” Kagome shrieked. “I can't wait that long! InuYasha will hate me! What if they find Naraku?” Kagome was panicking, but her mother just shook her head.

 

“There is no way to make it faster, I'm so sorry,” Mrs. Higurashi said. “That's the soonest they can come out.” Kagome dropped her book bag and sat on the steps, sulking. She fingered the necklace holding the shikon no kakera she had collected.

 

“Well, I do have the class trip in a couple weeks,” Kagome said. “I would have had to come back for that.” Kagome stood up and walked to the rubble that had once been the well she traveled in to reach a fairy tale world she never imagined. She touched the debris, kneeling in them, as she had every day since the explosion. “Will you wait for me, InuYasha? I'm so sorry,” she said. “I will be back as soon as possible. Will you be there?” she whispered. “Or will you forget me?” Kagome ignored the familiar burning behind her eyes and stood back up before she started crying. She had certainly done enough of that these past two weeks. She walked away, refusing to look back, as she had every day. It had become a ritual.

 

She did her homework, then laid in bed, trying not to think of InuYasha. But she failed, miserably. She wondered if they could even fix what had been broken. She knew there was a chance that even if they put the well back, the time anomaly in it would be destroyed. “Did you forget me?” she asked InuYasha, five hundred years in the past. “Did you go back to Kikyo?” she whispered, a tear tracing down her cheeks. She rolled over and clutched her pillow, smothering her sobs. Soon, she was asleep, the same as every night now.

 

“InuYasha?” Kagome asked, reaching out for the red-clothed figure at the bottom of the well. He looked up at her, but she couldn't see his face. “Catch me as I fall,” she whispered, and then jumped. “Say you're here and it's all over now,” she said as she fell forever. But she never reached him. She watched his hair turn black, his ears disappear and then was looking into his human eyes, but they got no closer. He resumed his hanyo form and she still couldn't reach him. She wasn't floating like the well always caused her to, but in a freefall. InuYasha looked down and picked up something from the ground. The shikon no tama, she realized. He looked up at her and closed his eyes, looking peaceful. She was getting closer, then his eyes opened and she was staring into their red depths, fear clutching her.

 

“Don't cry,” he growled at her. “I'm all that's left.” Kagome's tears fell against her will, splashing down onto his cheeks, landing on the violet stripes there. He reached a sharp-clawed hand, covered in blood, up to her. She fell to the ground at his feet and he grabbed her, his talons digging into her shoulders. Instead of pulling her up to stand with him, he knelt, his knees on either side of hers and pushed her back. He held her down and she closed her eyes, willing the pain away. “Don't close your eyes,” he growled and she opened them.

 

Kagome woke up in her room, alone. It was the same dream she had been having off and on since the well was destroyed. She rolled over, her heart aching, fear that she really was going to be forever without him overwhelming her. She couldn't sleep and she climbed out of bed, padded across her bedroom and downstairs, out the front door, walked to InuYasha's Tree and knelt. She reached out and touched the bark, pressing her palm against it, wishing it would work as it once did and allow her to communicate with him. But he was no longer pinned to the tree in his time and there was only an emptiness echoing across time. He was really gone and she couldn't get to him. She saw him there, restrained against the tree by that fateful arrow, hair blowing softly in the wind and she shifted her weight to lean against the rough bark. She laid her head against it, looking up and imagining him there. She would be at his feet. She reached out and her hand passed through the empty space that he should have occupied. She relaxed on the ground and before she knew it, she was asleep.

 

Past…

InuYasha met Sango and Miroku a while later. Sango was already pregnant and they had been married only a week after they left him at the well. Miroku apologized for not waiting, but InuYasha understood. He wouldn't have waited, either, if he had known he could actually lose Kagome. It seemed that he was doomed to lose everyone that he loved. Shippo stayed with Miroku and Sango in the small village they had moved into. Once InuYasha saw how happy they were with their new lives, he moved on. He was satisfied that they were doing well and since he wasn't, he didn't want to bring them down. Everyone he cared about was gone or settled down, so now he could die in peace.

 

InuYasha set out on a quest to find the strongest youkai he could, so that he could die in battle. Unfortunately, without Kagome to protect, Tetsusaiga refused to transform for him, so all his fights were with his claws, as it once was. And still, he defeated monster after monster, demon after demon. He couldn't lose. So he sought out the one youkai he was certain would defeat him. His brother.

 

It took him nearly a month to find the youkai. It took him less than a minute to start a fight. Sesshomaru beat him down with only his claws and InuYasha wondered why Sesshomaru refused to use his sword and end it. When InuYasha was broken and bleeding, lying torn on the ground, Sesshomaru turned to walk away.

 

“What are you doing?” InuYasha demanded, crawling to his hands and knees. “Kill me,” he said. Sesshomaru turned around, his eyes wide with surprise.

 

“Is that what this was about, InuYasha?” A small smile curled his lips. “You wish to die?” InuYasha let his head hang, hoping it would be severed quickly. He could feel when he was fighting, but now that it was over, one pain blended into another and he slipped into his numbness once again. Sesshomaru's scent grew stronger and InuYasha knew he was approaching. He didn't have the strength to fight anymore, but it wasn't necessary. His brother had defeated him in a fair fight and now he could do what he had made clear was a desire of his heart. He could end InuYasha's life. But instead, he knelt to meet his half-brother's eyes. “I told you once that I didn't inherit Father's mercy. Things have not changed.” InuYasha's eyes widened as Sesshomaru rose, turned and walked away.

 

“You… bastard,” InuYasha growled before passing out completely. He followed his brother once he healed, trying to irritate him into killing him, but Sesshomaru just ignored him. It started to become a game, seeing if he could goad his brother into more than just insulting banter. But after a few weeks, InuYasha realized it was going to take something desperate to earn his death. So one night, InuYasha walked up behind Rin, who watched him curiously, having gotten used to his presence. The girl had even once given him a wreath of flowers. She smiled at him and he almost couldn't do what he was planning. He closed his eyes, then reached out and grabbed her, lifting her small body against his chest and pressing his claws into her tiny throat.

 

The amusement that had graced Sesshomaru's face for the entire game they had played disappeared. He stilled and watched InuYasha, his eyes narrowing. InuYasha felt a small amount of triumph, but it was drowned by the guilt caused by grabbing a helpless child, especially one that had come to trust him.

 

“Do not be stupid, brother,” Sesshomaru said, a hue of red flashing through his eyes. InuYasha growled and scratched Rin, drawing her blood. The scent of it upset him immensely. She reminded InuYasha of Kagome and it was an unbearable thought, harming the child. His hand shook, but Sesshomaru's eyes simply bled back to normal. “You can't even kill me,” Sesshomaru said, “Why should I believe you would kill a helpless child?” It was such a mirror of his own thoughts that InuYasha gritted his teeth and growled louder. “Kill her then. I will bring her back. But I will not give you what you seek.” InuYasha tried to close his hand, tried to rip out Rin's throat, but it was impossible. He released her gently and she ran, terrified, to hide behind his brother. InuYasha fell to his knees, feeling lost and broken.

 

“Please,” he begged. “Please… brother.” Sesshomaru's eyes actually softened, but he looked away and pushed Rin ahead of him, protecting her with his body as he walked on. Jaken had remained shocked through this whole exchange and upon seeing Sesshomaru leaving, he ran to follow. InuYasha threw his head back and screamed, balling his hands into fists. He had fallen so far and nothing seemed to matter anymore.

 

Present…

Kagome shuddered as the strangest feeling of having a dagger shoved into her heart ripped through her. Then she opened her eyes and found herself under the tree again. This time, she barely remembered leaving her bed. She quickly got up and ran into the house, afraid her mother would see her again. She had been so worried to find Kagome sleeping outside before. But she had become so accustomed to sleeping under the stars that there were nights when she couldn't handle being inside. She didn't have that horrible dream when she slept at the base of the tree. She could almost imagine InuYasha sleeping in it above her.

 

She got dressed quickly, gathering her candy and lunch that her mother left on the table for her. Today was the class trip to Hiroshima and she didn't want to be late. If she was lucky, she would get to sit next to Ayumi on the bus. She knew Eri and Yuka would get there together. She was very happy to see Ayumi and scooted into line next to her, ducking her head so that no one would notice she wasn't where she was supposed to be for morning meeting. After it was over, she managed to stick next to Ayumi all the way onto the bus.

 

They traded candy on the bus when the teacher wasn't looking and told very quiet jokes. Kagome was finally relaxed and enjoying herself, so glad to be away from Tokyo for a while when she sensed a fragment of the shikon no tama. She spun her head in shock, staring out the window and crawling to her knees.

 

“Higurashi!” the teacher reprimanded and Kagome sat down quickly, but she didn't take her eyes off the road until they stopped. She hated to do it, but she had to know why there was a shard here, so she slipped carefully away while the teacher was lecturing. “Baseball fans should recognize this city as home to the Hiroshima Toyo Carp, six-time champions of…” Kagome breathed a nervous sigh when she could no longer hear the teacher. She said a silent apology for what she was doing and hailed a cab. She instructed it to go back to where she had felt the shard, getting as close as she could afford. She didn't know how she would get home, but she supposed traipsing around modern Japan wasn't that different from roving the warring era. Except that now, she was alone.

 

She walked for over an hour and left the city behind before she couldn't go any further. She was at a solid wall of rock. She touched the bottom of the cliff, running her hands up and down the stone, looking for the shard. But it was just past this by another several meters. She figured that it had been completely sealed in from rockslides and earthquakes over the centuries. She wanted to get inside, though. She wanted the shard. She tried to see any other way in, but it seemed futile. That's when she sensed the demonic aura.

 

She turned and took a step back in fear and shock. Sesshomaru stood in front of her, wearing a black suit and black Italian leather shoes. His hair was gone, close to the sides of his head, only his bangs much the same, except they covered the crescent moon on his forehead now. She was so shocked to see him without armor, his big white kimono or a sword.

 

“So it is,” Sesshomaru said and Kagome's blood ran cold. She never suspected that he could possible still be alive. Yet, he was standing in front of her in an expensive suit and shoes that could buy a car. Strangely, he didn't look out of place in it at all. But his hair… She imagined InuYasha chopping off all his hair and bit her lip in horror. She liked shorthaired guys just fine, but it just wasn't right on either of the brothers.

 

“You cut your hair?” she blurted, unable to stand the silence anymore. He looked at her, finally meeting her eyes and smiling a little. She took a step back, having never seen him smile without blood spilling.

 

“Do you fear for my beauty?” Sesshomaru asked. He no longer looked like a teenager, either. He wasn't old by any means, but she would have guessed him closer to twenty-five than nineteen in appearance. He turned his head, revealing that his hair wasn't short, it was just pulled back into a tight braid, making it look short from the front. She breathed a sigh of relief, then giggled nervously when she realized that it made her feel better to know that at least one thing hadn't changed about Sesshomaru. She hoped other things had, especially since he was still standing there and she was still breathing. His smile widened at her expression and she frowned at him.

 

“I knew that youkai were long-lived, but you don't look like you've aged much,” Kagome said.

 

“Neither do you and I know for a fact that humans do not look the same after five hundred years,” he retorted. “In fact, I would say you look exactly the same as the last time I saw you, Kagome.”

 

“You remember my name?” she said.

 

“Do you not recall mine?”

 

“Ha ha. You obviously know… about my time traveling, Sesshomaru.” She tried to figure out why he was here. “Why are you here?” When in doubt, try being blunt.

 

“I recognized your scent and felt that there was no way this could have been a coincidence: you, at my brother's grave.”

 

“Grave?” Kagome exclaimed and turned to the rock in horror. “He's dead?”

 

“Then this truly is just a strange twist of fate?” he asked, stepping forward and touching the rock, as she had before.

 

“I sensed a shikon shard,” Kagome said. Sesshomaru glanced back at her, then turned and leaned against the rock.

 

“Yes, he asked me to place one in his mouth, so that it might not be taken from him.” Sesshomaru said, crossing his arms. Kagome blinked in confusion. Arms?

 

“Why do you have two arms?” she asked, and then quickly covered her mouth, realizing how rude her question was.

 

“It has been five hundred years, Kagome. Much changes.” Kagome blinked hard. It felt so strange, hearing him say her name. Especially in such a familiar fashion, as if they were old friends. But then, he hadn't seen her in five hundred years. She supposed that now, she truly would be something familiar. Didn't she get excited when she saw something she had known as a child make a comeback, even if she hadn't felt strongly about it before? “I suppose it is time,” he said cryptically. He stepped away from the wall and turned to it, glaring at it.

 

“Time?” Kagome repeated. Sesshomaru reached out and dragged his claws down the rock, melting it like a hot knife through butter. Kagome stepped back, knowing that what was left behind was laced with his poison. He reached out with his other hand and repeated it, almost like a cat lazily sharpening its claws without thinking about it. She stared at the complexity of his braid, curious because it wasn't a typical three-strand braid. She wondered if he had someone else style it or if he did it himself. Half an hour later, he was through all the stone and he stepped back, admiring his handiwork. He had created a crude archway leading into a cavern.

 

“Yes, time.” He said as though she had just spoken. She jumped at the sound of his voice and peeked in under his arm.

 

“I can't see,” she said and was startled when he pressed a small flashlight in her hand, closing her fingers over it with his own. She wasn't sure if it was weirder that he was handing her a tool or that he was touching her. She decided that it was because he was touching her and she stepped away from him, clicking the light on. She followed the beam of light, walking about two meters past the entrance before she reached another wall. She swung the beam of light around and it fell on a crumpled form wearing a red kimono. Kagome dropped the light with a gasp. It rolled to perfectly illuminate InuYasha, lying as though he was asleep.

 

Past into Present…
InuYasha finished telling his brother about Kagome. He didn't know why he had come to his brother and not Miroku. Perhaps it was that he knew Miroku would stop him if he knew what InuYasha was planning. It was an old curse and the youkai he made the bargain with was not to be trusted. He knew the monster would make it impossible for the curse to ever break. But he had to try. He had accepted the fact that he was going to be forced to live, but not that he would have to deal with it.

 

Sesshomaru refused to kill him out of mercy, but InuYasha had come up with a better plan. He knew his brother would keep his word, no matter who he had to kill to do so. So he offered him the only thing Sesshomaru could possibly want from him. Tetsusaiga. It was worthless to him now anyway. Sesshomaru had been silent for a long time before he took the sword, wrapped in cloth to protect him from the barrier. He accompanied his brother to his final resting place and watched the youkai place the curse and watched still as InuYasha fell to the ground, dead for all appearances. He rearranged his brother's body, unable to tolerate the disarray the hanyo had fallen in. When InuYasha looked comfortably asleep, Sesshomaru moved on.

 

He had tracked down a jewel shard, as his brother requested, then returned and set it in his mouth, under his tongue. He walked away from the cave, then turned and blasted the rocks, causing them to fall and completely obscure InuYasha. After that, he put the hanyo out of his mind for five hundred years as he watched the world change. Rin grew up and fell in love with a human man she met in a village they often passed through. He watched over their family, remaining her protector as she grew old and her children grew up. He sat by her bedside as she died and made certain she was buried with the necklace she had woven from a lock of his hair he had given her by request. He had visited her grave every few years until the stone wore down to dust. He still walked to that place, although there was now a human house built over it.

 

He had searched for Naraku for over a century and never found him. Shortly after his brother went insane, the other hanyo seemed to drop out of existence. Sesshomaru didn't trust it for a minute, but he also never found any clue as to the demon's whereabouts. He fought thousands of battles, lead vast armies in a great war against the human threat and watched as the Youkai Age ended. He flew across the world, seeing lands he never dreamed of, learning many new languages and watching foreign empires rise and fall. He always came home to Japan, though. Always checked Rin's grave and tried to find the clue to wielding Tetsusaiga. With two arms again, he couldn't even just attach a new human arm to aid him.

 

When the Americans dropped the bomb on Hiroshima, he had remembered burying his brother very near there and became concerned. He walked into the wake of the attack, unaffected by the radiation or the suffering all around. Once he found his brother's resting place undisturbed, he was content to let it be. He knew that the time was soon coming that his brother's wench would be born. He watched the schools, taking interest once they adopted the British Navy uniforms, but knew it wasn't time. When the nineteen-seventies came, he started looking at the junior high schools in Tokyo, as his brother had requested. He was told not to interfere when he found Kagome, to let her find him, and so he did. He found her long before she entered junior high. He scented her when she was just a third-grader. He watched her grow up and she reminded so much of Rin it was painful. He grew frustrated as her school years progressed and she didn't find the well InuYasha had described. Sesshomaru had even tried to use it once and failed. He didn't expect to succeed, but he was curious.

 

So on the day she followed her brother to the well house, he watched very carefully as she awoke Mistress Centipede and fell into history. He never came near her again until this day, knowing that her powers as a miko were awakened in the feudal era. He couldn't take the chance that he would fail to uphold his end of the bargain by being detected early. He had worried that she would never visit Hiroshima, so he had influenced the principal's decision regarding the class trip.

 

It had been strange, seeing his brother alive and well on the few occasions he risked entering Tokyo. He was always careful that InuYasha didn't sense him, wearing expensive cologne and masking his powers. He had once been as close as half a meter to the hanyo and remained unnoticed. Blending in with humans was what had saved him all these years.

 

He was waiting near his brother, knowing that the curse's time was running out when he had scented Kagome again. He watched her walk unwaveringly to the gravesite and wondered if InuYasha had managed to leave her a message in the past for her to find now. He hadn't realized that he, himself, had left the message in InuYasha's mouth. He waited until he heard her speaking to the hanyo, desperately shaking him and begging him to awaken before he stepped into the cavern.

 

“That won't work,” he told her. She looked back at him, tears streaking down her face. He blinked in surprise. She had sounded angry from outside and he hadn't expected her to be shedding tears for his half-brother. He no longer thought the boy a fool for loving this girl. She was obviously as devoted to him as he was to her. He wondered if she would have died for five hundred years for him. “It has been centuries and so much time is hard to keep track of, but I know that the curse will end soon.”

 

“So he'll wake up?” Kagome asked, looking hopeful.

 

“No, he will die forever.” Sesshomaru watched the girl absorb the information. He was fascinated by how nothing had changed about his brother since he had last seen him. Even his clothes had remained unchanged. He must have sealed the passage better than he knew, if animals and insects hadn't fed on him at all.

 

“Bring him back!” Kagome suddenly shrieked, flying at him with her fists clenched. Sesshomaru looked down at her, refusing to step back in the face of her fury. There was nothing she could do to harm him, after all.

 

“I cannot.”

 

“Bullshit!” Kagome yelled and he blinked in surprise. “Use Tenseiga!”

 

“It is a spell, Kagome,” Sesshomaru said, using her name to focus her attention on what he was saying. She calmed a little. “Tenseiga can not break it. InuYasha knew this when he asked the youkai to curse him.”

 

“Asked?” Kagome repeated, confused.

 

“He refused to live without you,” Sesshomaru said. “He begged me to kill him. He even attacked my Rin, trying to earn his death.”

 

“Why didn't you kill him?” she asked.

 

“Because it is what he wanted,” Sesshomaru answered. “And there is no honor in killing a broken animal. That is what you left him as.”

 

“You make it sound like I chose not to go back!” Kagome yelled. “The well was destroyed, I couldn't get back. I've prayed every day to return,” she said. “I guess it never mattered,” she said, sadly.

 

“No. You never returned.”

 

“But why, if you wouldn't kill him, did you help me to unseal him?”

 

“Because I am the one who entombed his body here. I am the one who placed the shikon no kakera in his mouth. I am the one who saw to it that your class was brought to Hiroshima.”

 

“What? But…” Kagome looked down at InuYasha. “Why do all that? You said he wanted the curse, yet you wouldn't kill him because he wanted it. It makes no sense.”

 

“It was a trade,” Sesshomaru said. “I gave him hope, he gave me our father's fang.” Kagome's head shot up and she met his eyes in fear.

 

“He gave you Tetsusaiga?”

 

“The perils of love,” Sesshomaru responded.

 

“Have you learned to use it?” Kagome asked.

 

“I know how to use it. The barrier has not allowed me to pass, though. It does not matter. This is no longer a warring era. My path of conquest has shifted to suit the changing world. I am still one of the most powerful youkai in the world, but it is through finance and politics rather than strength and prowess.” Sesshomaru looked out of the cavern, reminding himself of the world outside. For a moment, standing next to the girl in her school uniform and his brother in his fire rat kimono, he had forgotten the modern world that he so hated. How he longed for the days when he could simply kill his enemies with his bare hands. “It was a small thing, bringing you here.”

 

They stood there silently for a few minutes before Kagome spoke again. “How do I wake him?” she asked.

 

“I cannot tell you.”

 

“Cannot or will not?” she asked accusingly. “You're the one bragging about all your power.”

 

“Cannot. No amount of money or connections can break the spell that witnessing his binding put on me. I cannot speak the counter curse. I can, however, tell you that you should be able to discover it rather quickly. It is the oldest negation in fairy tales.” Sesshomaru turned and walked out of the cave, trusting that the girl could grasp the enormous hint he had left her with.

 

Kagome stared at InuYasha in frustration. “Oldest negation in fairy tales?” she asked the empty cave. She thought about every fairy tale she had heard and thought on what broke spells. When she realized what it was, she slapped her forehead at her own stupidity. “Of course. In other countries, sleeping spells are always broken by a kiss,” she said to no one in particular. She leaned over InuYasha and paused at the sight of the jewel shard glowing from his mouth. “You left me all the answers,” she whispered, sliding her fingers between his cold lips and shuddering at the feeling as she pulled out the shard. “A beacon and a clue,” she named the shard, then set it on the floor as she leaned down and kissed him. He didn't feel asleep as he had when pinned by the arrow; he felt dead. His skin was cold and he had no sense of movement about him.

 

But it changed after a moment. She felt heat begin to seep into his lips and his heart beat under her hand. She started to pull away, but his hand had moved to press against the back of her head. He kissed her back and she was surprised with the intensity he put into it; especially for someone who had been dead for five hundred years. His eyes opened and she pulled back.

 

“You found me,” he whispered. His voice was hoarse and his eyes shadowed. She wondered if that was a result of the curse or if he had really been in such bad shape when he submitted to it. His eyes moved across her face and he touched her cheek. “You've been crying,” he whispered.

 

“It's been too long,” she answered. “I thought I would never see you again.”

 

“Then Sesshomaru showed you where I was?” he asked.

 

“Sorta. I sensed the jewel shard,” she answered, helping him sit up. She frowned, feeling his ribs through his kimono. She pushed them back before he could fight her and gasped, her hand going to her mouth. He closed the garments quickly, glaring at her. But she had seen; seen the bruises and starved body. “How long was it for you?” she asked.

 

“Five hundred years,” he said grouchily.

 

“I got your message,” she said, reaching into her backpack. He looked over at her and grabbed her wrist, pulling her into a hug. She held onto the rock she had grabbed, but embraced him back as tightly as she could. When they broke from it, he looked down at what she held in her hand, tracing the words with his finger.

 

“I carved that every night for three years,” he said. Kagome's eyes went wide and she clutched the stone tighter. “Except for the seven months I spent trying to convince Sesshomaru to kill me. I slept at the bottom of the well, waiting for you,” he confessed.

 

“Did you ever defeat Naraku?” she asked as he leaned against her shoulder and took her hand in both of his.

 

“No,” he said.

 

“What did you do?” she asked, confused. `Why would he give up on chasing that monster?' she wondered.

 

“I told you. I slept in the well. I tried to get through to you. Miroku and Sango got married and had kids. Shippo stayed with them,” InuYasha said it all as though talking about strangers. Kagome's hand convulsed in his.

 

“I missed all that?” she asked, feeling sad.

 

“Why didn't you come back?” InuYasha asked. “Why couldn't I come through?”

 

“The well was destroyed in an explosion,” she answered. “No one could find out how it happened. My mom's supposed to be getting it fixed, but I guess it doesn't matter.”

 

“I'm sorry,” InuYasha said suddenly.

 

“Huh? For what?” Kagome asked.

 

“For being such a jerk,” he answered. “When I lost you, I realized that I had been a real bastard to you. I saw you angry or sad more times than I saw you smiling or laughing,” he met her eyes and she squirmed. “I thought maybe that you had decided you would never come back and had found a way to seal the well. And why shouldn't you? After all, I never once told you that I love you,” he said. Kagome gasped and InuYasha looked away. “And maybe it's stupid to think you might feel the same way—”

 

“It's not stupid,” Kagome said, looking away. “I do feel the same way. I've told you before.”

 

“Yeah, but all this time has passed,” he said. “Without me. I figured you might have found someone new.”

 

“Um…” Kagome tried to figure out if he would be mad that it had only been a month for her. She took a deep breath.

 

“It's only been a month,” she said quickly. His ears perked towards her, then he reached out and hugged her again.

 

“I'm so glad,” he whispered. “I hated thinking that you were…” his voice trailed off, too hoarse to work anymore.

 

“InuYasha?” she asked, pulling back to look in his eyes. “You're not mad?”

 

“Why would I be mad?” he asked. “You were safe.” Then he leaned in towards her and she closed her eyes, wondering if he was really going to kiss her. A moment later, she had her answer in the form of his dry, cracked lips touching her own. She pressed against the rough texture until she couldn't take anymore and she broke the kiss to hug him again.

 

“I'm sorry I never came back,” she whispered. “I meant to, I really did. And I'm sorry I got mad when I thought you came back early for me when the well was destroyed and I'm sorry for saying `sit' so many times that last week and I'm—”

 

“Kagome!” InuYasha said, grasping her shoulders. She stopped and took a breath. “I'm glad I don't have that on anymore,” he said. “Or I think you would have just broken my face.”

 

“What?” Kagome asked, then looked again. His rosary was gone. He put his hand inside his haori and pulled it out.

 

“After you didn't come back in a year, I tried to take it off. It didn't resist,” he said. She touched it and he snatched it back, a wary look crossing his features. “I'm not letting you put it back on me,” he said.

 

“Wait… Sesshomaru said you gave Tetsusaiga to him?” Kagome said, looking at him.

 

“Yeah. Wasn't much use to me without you,” he admitted.

 

“No, you have to get it back,” she said.

 

“What? I don't understand. I can't go back to the sengoku jidai and I know I don't need it here,” he said.

 

“It's not that,” Kagome said, then took a long breath and paused. “We never told you… because we didn't want you to just toss it away,” she said. The break she took this time caused InuYasha to prompt her.

 

“Tell me what?”

 

“It seals your youkai blood,” Kagome confessed. “Without it, you'll transform.” She flinched, expecting him to say `good riddance.' But he didn't say anything. She finally looked up at him and he was staring past her.

 

“I can't get it back,” he said. “I made a deal. I can't take it back,” he whispered. “That's… not the youkai I want to be,” he said. “I never want to hurt you again.” Kagome looked into his face, shocked. His eyes were closed with pain and his jaw was clenched. She touched his cheek and his eyes flew open. “I can't even begin to tell you how much I missed you. I had no idea… how much you meant to me until you were gone and I couldn't find you. I didn't know where you were, if you were okay and there was no way for me to contact you. So I left you messages, hoping that someday, you would get them and know that I never forgot. Every time I thought about the fact that I refused to look at you the last chance I had…” InuYasha was shaking violently now and a single tear fell from his eye. Kagome leaned in and kissed it away.

 

“We'll figure something out,” Kagome whispered. “All that matters is that it's over now. You're here, I'm here and we're together. We've been through a lot like this and we'll get through this, too.” InuYasha held her close again and she made a promise to both of them that they would fix what had been broken.

 

 

To be continued…

 

I'm not sure how long it will be until part two is written, but this half of the story can stand alone as is for the most part. That's why it's “Part 1” and not “Chapter 1”. I don't feel like this is a chapter in a series of such, but half of a completed story. While only half, it still is a story on its own and I hope you enjoyed it. It's odd, as I wrote it, I had no real emotional involvement until a friend of mine went missing and I've been completely unable to contact her. So the story became much more meaningful when that happened and while I felt the emotions of the piece before, this time, it took no time to have them slam into me and I wrote much of this from the heart. I hope it shows.