Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction ❯ Trial By Tenderness ❯ Part 26 - Windsprings ( Chapter 26 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
Part 26 Windsprings


Skuldandy woke up in her room, her feeling of disorientation bubbling from her insides out as she viewed the morning sunlight illuminating the oversized dimensions of her new body. It almost came as a surprise...she'd slept so hard that she forgot that she and Belldandy had switched bodies yesterday.
"I'm going to *murderize* Mara if she turns out to be the cause of this!" was the first thought that beckoned her attention. She looked at Big Sister Urd, who was snoring like a male panda on her left side. Skuldandy could smell the 'more than a trace of sake' on her breath. On her other side, her elder sister, Bellkuld, was curled up serenely, almost buried under her blanket.
"In *my* body..." Skuldandy thought with dismay, her disorientation heightened at the sight of *her own* petite form gentled in the futon next to her. Skuldandy put a steadying hand to her head as a swarming sense of dizziness accompanied the sight.
Normally, she slept in the middle futon...and at times she felt like she was the buffer between her two older sisters during waking hours as well. Actually, being the youngest *had* its advantages, sometimes. This was one of those times. She always felt most secure with these arrangements; sleeping in the middle with an older sister on each side. The mortal world held its share of fearful things. The immortal world...possessed even worse things.
"Like plants that cause you to switch bodies with anyone who happens to be nearby!" she lamented, tinged with poignant calumnity towards Mara.
Skuldandy sat up on her futon and grimaced as she examined her pajamas. Little frilly patterns were sewn into them, forming a childishly effeminate zoological discord. Glancing up and down the sleeves, Skuldandy was especially disgruntled with the 'piyo piyo' baby chicks and 'peppo' baby pigs or hippos or whatever the heck they were.
"Why would Elder Sister Belldandy choose such *girlish* mortal bedclothes?" she wondered aloud to herself in a whisper. Then she thought about Keiichi undoing the buttons to these *same* pajama tops...and she wheelspinned towards an uncomforting nausea.
"I'm gonna be sick! I gotta get out of these...they're gross and disgusting!" she mentally exclaimed, fed up to the bursting point.
Skuldandy stood up and tiptoed to the closet, careful not to wake her sisters. With a soft "whoosh", she gingerly slid the closet doors open and pushed Urd and Belldandy's outfits down the hamper, creating a pocket of space between them and her own clothes. Her third of the closet was filled with mortal and Goddess outfits; the majority of them styled after the latest pre-teen Yggdrasilian fashions. Preteen as in pre-130,000 years.
"Mmmm...not that one...no, not that one either. Ahhh, *this* one!" she said with a self-mastering whisper. She selected one of her favorite outfits: a silver long-sleeved pullover top, a navy blue light jacket, a sheen black miniskirt, white cotton leggings and mid-calf blue socks to go with her patent white high-top tennies. She laid out her ensemble on her futon as she routinely did before dressing. Ever since her powers were suspended, Skuldandy had to learn how to dress herself...instead of simply materializing in whatever clothes she wanted to be attired in. She looked at the size 1 top, just barely in an adult size...
She unbuttoned her pajama tops and slid out of them, momentarily fascinated by the bustline on her chest.
"Will mine be this big?" she wondered with a mixture of envy and fear as she looked down her front. She paused momentarily, wanting to examine her suddenly adult bosom with her fingers.
"I can't do that! It would be...perverted!" she realized with a shudder. Quickly grabbing the pullover top so she wouldn't be tempted any more, she tried to slip it on over her head...
And got stuck.

"EEEEEEEEK!!! I DON'T HAVE *ANYTHING* TO WEAR! ALL MY OWN CLOTHES ARE TOO SMALL!!! THEY DON'T FIT! HELPPPPP!"

* * * * * * * *

"Ohayo," I greeted the three sisters as they entered the dining room. I had been abruptly jarred out of mid-dream by an ear-shredding scream, followed by heated argument. It came from the direction of the "Women's Dorm", as Keiichi had labeled the sister's bedroom. Most of the time it was the "Goddesses' Bedroom" or "The Bedroom"; but when the three got rowdy...it was the "Dorm".
Today was definitely going to be a 'dorm' kinda day.
"What's so 'ohayo' about this morning?" Urd answered with a irritated grumble. I looked up and instantly covered my mouth to avoid laughing at her 'growl'.
Urd had "Too" and Bellkuld had "Small" written clearly on their faces and pajamas in at least a dozen places. Skuldandy had a look of absolute misery on her face, occasionally flinching in response to the irritated glances directed at her from her two sisters.
Keiichi walked into the dining room, surveyed the wickedtense scene at the table, and then suppressed his laughter by what looked like a heroic effort. When I saw the twinkling of mirth in his eyes, I started to giggle. Despite his efforts a few guffaws leaked out...which cued me into a torrent of laughter. It was one of those insane laughing fits where just the sight of Keiichi laughing sent me into bigtime laughter. We were feeding into each other, while the three Goddesses were focusing their ire at us with increasing scorn.
"You two men think something's *funny*?" Urd remonstrated with a red face. We both shook our heads and hands an emphatic "no"...then nature coursed us away in her grasp and we both burst out anew in antic levity. In my mind, it was totally comical...each Goddess had gotten tagged after her own characteristic or situation.
Urd possesses "too" much personality! Bellkuld in Skuld's body is too "small"! It was bizarre to the nth power, seeing Skuld's 'calligraphy' power manifested on her own body. I felt relieved when Megumi, Genji and Tomohisa came in and immediately joined in the contagious laughter.
Safety in numbers, so to speak.
Both Urd and Bellkuld glared at all of us mortals. For a moment, I forgot that Belldandy was in Skuld's body...the intensity of her roiling glare matched the best of Skuld's patent 'Skuld-fit' pissed-off expressions.
Genji had been staying in my room while I was gone, so now he was sharing rooms with Tomohisa. It looked like he had been up late talking with the younger Tomohisa; they both shared tired expressions. Tomohisa was laughing *too* richly...and Skuldandy wasted no effort to chap him out.
Breakfast was accompanied by a syrupy gloom. I could almost see the internal struggle going on in Keiichi's heart. I could only imagine his situation: here was the woman that he loved with all of his heart...in a 12-year-old's body! Sitting next to her was the beautiful face and body of the woman he had been going out with for over three years...a face that he couldn't kiss because his true love's soul or spirit wasn't animating it. And I had thought my 'no touch' situation with Urd was bad! It was really minors compared to the wretched situation Keiichi was experiencing.
"What is Urd thinking about all of this?" I wondered. Urd had simply soused herself with a few bottles of sake and bourbon last night in an attempt to deal with her sister's dilemma. I couldn't fault her for this; if I wasn't a recovering addict, I would have probably done the same thing were I in her circumstances.
"I have an announcement to make!" Urd said, springing to her feet all of a sudden. Her abrupt change in demeanor gripped everyone's attention. She raised her coffee cup as if to offer a toast.
"Cevn and I are getting married!"
"EEEP...huh?" someone gasped.
I half-gasped, half-choked. I knew that either my face was blanched from the shock or it was beet red from embarrassment. My jaw felt like it had just gained 40 kg. Everything faded to a tinny white as my nervous system glimmered me into shock. I desperately looked around the table...every face had a look of absolute astonishment as their eyes pendulumed between Urd and I. I must have had "meltdown" written on my face, if not in words but in expression.
My paranoia increased when Megumi broke the silence.
"I *knew* something happened between you two! That's why you both ended up in China! And then you both came back *together*! What'd you do, elope to Beijing for nine weeks?" she stated conclusively with a question.
"Aaaah, I bet you did! No wonder you weren't answering the phone!" Megumi added, pointing her finger at me while luxuriating in my embarrassment.
"That's why you didn't answer our calls, my sneaky adopted big brother! You two were honeymooning behind our backs!" she said with a wink, nudging me with an elbow. This was the same Megumi that was livid in coils with me last night. Now she had paired Urd and I together as a couple. I desperately hoped that her intuitive leaps were nothing more than a belingering mood resulting from that 'good cheer' spell that Skuldandy had cast on us all last night.
I needed to counter Urd's 'declaration' fast!!!
"N..no way! She's ju..just joking. A *joke*! I..I don't know what she's talking about! You know Urd...always trying to be the center of attention, always being funny!" I stammered out, attempting to gainsay Urd's lightning strike announcement.
I looked at them, trying to project a persuasive demeanor. They weren't buying it one bit. Keiichi leaned backwards and fell off his zabuton onto his back, visibly acting out his surprise with a sprawl. Bellkuld looked at me with a gripping scrutiny, while Skuldandy looked like she was either going to explode with rage or faint from being overwrought.
I felt a huge sense of disappointment. After Urd and I had discussed and agreed that we were going to *gently* break the news to everybody...she just busts it out in the middle of breakfast!
I looked at her; she was grinning broadly from face to face like a politician...while my spine felt spiraled with tension.
"Yep, this is a 'dorm' day for sure, now!" I groused, just wanting to crawl back in bed and hide. Fear washed over me...fear of being rejected by them, fear of having my feelings exposed, fear of being abused, fear of being rejected by Urd's sisters...
I looked at Urd with total panic on my face. She grinned mischievously at me, then her face faulted as she saw Skuldandy's wrathful expression.
"Urd!!! Big Sister! H..how c..could you..." Skuldandy said in a quivering snarl of a voice.
"Okay...enough's enough! I was just BS'ing you guys! Hey, I just wanted to lighten things up! You guy's are *too* serious this morning! So I decided to change the mood around here a bit. You know...create an emotional shift!" Urd explained.
"The only one who's too anything is you! Why don't you go in front of a mirror and read your face!" Skuldandy reposited with barely controlled anger. Anger that was aimed towards me a few seconds earlier.
"Urd, how could you even imagine such a terrible thing? Marrying a mortal? No way! We're Goddesses and they're...let's just say they're unfit for us!" Skuldandy continued, all serious now.
"AHEM!!!" I heard Keiichi clear his throat contentiously.
Urd smiled at everybody, but I caught a private message in her eyes when she smiled at me. Her ivy-green eyes said "Owned!" She grinned apologetically at the group and sat down, glancing at me again to convey the fact that she had immensely enjoyed my moment of sheer terror.
"I'm gonna *get* you for that, Urd-chan," I promised myself. I looked at the others and noticed that Bellkuld had an introspective expression on her face. She had recovered fast from Urd's 'joke'.
"Urd, it's *not* funny to play around with the feelings of others," Bellkuld announced in a lecturing voice. "People are sensitive...*especially* mortals. What you may consider to be a harmless joke...often ends up deeply offending someone. Just look at all the times you offended Mara by joking about her being a late bloomer! And you know that your brand of humor has frequently embarrassed someone, like you've done so often with my Keiichi."
I let this new bit of information sink in...Mara was a late developer? If the female Goddesses and Demonesses were like mortal teenage girls, this was tantamount to an open invitation to taunts.
"No wonder Mara has it out for Urd," I conjectured.
"On the other hand, wouldn't it be easier to just say the truth? Urd, if you like Cevn, you should just say so, instead of making it into a joke and embarrassing him. Humor and wit often reveal personal sentiments otherwise left unsaid. I know that he's a mortal, but my personal experience with Keiichi shows that mortal men can be *very* loving..."
I didn't hear the rest of Bellkuld's soliloquy on the subject of mortal boyfriends...it was almost like she was unaware that we were in the room with her.
This was one of those times where I knew that Bell was speaking from the best of intentions. But somehow, in her own uniquely errant geniality, she was making things worse. In the manga that I had read, this character flaw was often employed to create humor. But now that I was living with the real manifestations of the characters in the manga...it wasn't funny at all! I felt extremely uncomfortable with the bent of this situation; Bellkuld was unconsciously superimposing truth in her words of conjecture. Or was she truly unaware of the irony enclasped in her words?
I looked briefly at Urd and saw that she was trying not to react with visible embarrassment at her sister's soft chastisement.
"...even though he's so insecure. If I made a joke about my Keiichi being a feckless wimp...it would probably cause him to wonder if it was true. Like I said, mortals have more uncertainties than we do. Keiichi is a man, not a wimp! He just overcame some of his reservations recently...and proved to me that he is very loving in a new way. So you see, I can't just joke about him being..." Bellkuld abruptly cut herself off, embarrassment flushing her face.
I watched Keiichi hang his head at this bald revelation.
"Practice what you preach, Bell," he said under his breath with a truckload of sarcasm.
I had to get out of there...there were too many tenterhooks and not enough carpet. Bellkuld had finished the process of pulling the carpet out from under me.
"Hey, things are getting a little too manic around here. I..I need to spell myself with a walk, okay?" I said curtly as I stood up. I finished my now-cold tea with a gulp and walked out to the front porch.
"Whew!" I thought, exhaling a huge lung-gust of tension as I passed the temple torii and turned the corner to walk down the street. Fast.

* * * * * * * *

Keiichi looked around his room, his view eventually settling on his desk. It had a thin sheet of dust on it, the result of the craziness yesterday. Tomorrow, he would be back at N.I.T, continuing his senior year. Despite the fact that N.I.T. was a bastion of sanity amidst the turmoil of living with three Goddesses and his little sister...there was no way was he going to school today! If he did, the temple might not be here upon his return. He glanced over the papers, textbooks and technical journals covering his desk.
"Forget it," he muttered. But a few minutes later, he was busy studying.
Both Tamiya and Ootaki had been accepted into the N.I.T. Graduate School last spring to earn their Master's of Engineering Degrees. Keiichi had been invited to a party at the Men's Dorm to celebrate the end of summer vacation. Of course, because it was planned by his sempai...it was several weeks late. They were expert at throwing spontaneous events, but they were consistently inept at organizing scheduled parties.
He was reluctant to attend because of the plight of his girlfriend, but Bellkuld had firmly insisted that he go tonight. He sensed that Bell knew that he needed a break. After a long study session, he got ready to go. At the door, he blew Bellkuld a kiss, since that was all he *could* do...and then he left with a backpack full of refreshments.
"I'm going to be graduating next year. Class of 20XX!" he thought with astonishment as he rode over to the Men's Dorm.

* * * * * * * *

"Heah Morisato! Yuh're late as usual! Whut was yuh plannin' ta do, skip da party?" Tamiya chastised him, mock-serious.
"Yah, dude! This is another time you can toast 'kampai' to us *grad students*! We's your *super sempai* now, Keiichi!" Ootaki said as he juggled three wrenches.
"Geez, how'd they let you into grad school with *that* kind of poor grammar?" Keiichi joked back. "You sound like you're from the south, Okinawa boy!"
"Just for that...you're goin' to have to karaoke...and I have just the disc for you. 'Hibari Mirsora's Greatest Hits: The Enka Ballads of the 1950s'. You can sing kayokyoku-style all night for us, Chiba boy," Ootaki teased as he dug through his CD collection.
"Heah everybodys, Keiichi here's gonna sing fer us!" Tamiya bellowed. Keiichi grimaced as the first strains of the enka wafted out of the stereo. Resigning himself to fate, he sang as the others hooted and jeered at his expense.
For the next few hours, Keiichi had to endure even worse tortures of the soul. One of the most exquisitely painful rituals was Tamiya's attempts at karaoke. Tamiya kept trying to howl out some songs by the Go-Bangs, a girl-rock idol group that was the rage years ago.
"Well, at least it wasn't those damned enka ballads," Keiichi thought with glum optimism, trying to salvage something out of the dire situation. When Tamiya got a few sakes in him, his singing bordered on cat-yowls crossed with construction site profanity. Rating a close second for sheer annoyance was Ootaki's attempts to be a one-man band: 'singing', playing air guitar and wastebasket drums to the headbanging music of AC/DC, Metallica and Iggy Pop, as well as Japan's X-Japan, Sheena and the Rockets, Xome and Piass.
Keiichi refrained from drinking too much sake because of the lethal combination of his sempai's 'talents'. Karaoke and Heavy Metal didn't belong in the same hallway, much less resounding in Keiichi's ears. And he *already* had a headache...there was no need to compound it by getting blasted with imported Coors.
Nevertheless, Keiichi ended up getting well lit with sake, due to the machinations of his two sempai, who were very inventive when it came to drinking games.
At 1:30am, the party started to wind down and Keiichi decided to call it a night. After waiting another hour to sober up a bit more, he left and rode home slowly on his antique BMW, wondering why his sempai had chosen to throw their little party in the middle of the school week.
When he arrived home, he found Cevn sitting in the dining room, poring over syllabus drafts. Keiichi felt a rise of smoky anger in his belly.
It was time for him to confront Cevn.
"Cevn, let's talk," he said gruffly. Cevn looked up at him, his admonishing expression saying "you're drunk from the party."
"Don't look at me like with that face! I'm not *that* drunk or anything! But we need to have a man-to-man talk about that lame stunt you pulled this summer!" Keiichi demanded, gesturing towards the front door.
They both walked out and sat on the porch.
"I don't know how to start...but I'm really disappointed in you! I realize that Urd brought you here as part of some Goddess thing, just as randomly as that night Bell-chan suddenly appeared in my life. But *I'm* the one who decided to let you stay here! *I* was the one who let you in to all of our lives, Cevn. About the time that you left, I was finally getting used to the fact that you were living here. That you were one of *us*. There was a time...when I would get pissed off when anyone else came here. First it was Megumi...then Urd...then Skuld. I just wanted it to be Bell-chan and I! But as time passed, I welcomed the idea of housemates.
"But now, I wonder..." he said, half angry, half resigned.
"Keiichi, you know me pretty well. I think you can recognize the fact that I *had* to leave," Cevn replied.
"*Had* to? Nobody has to do *anything*! Shit, you could've *talked to me*! Don't you think I know what it's like? I've also been royally screwed by Urd's stupid carelessness! She's zapped me with lightning strikes, tried to seduce me, invaded my bathroom privacy, drugged me on several occasions, turned Belldandy into a sex-starved maniac...I could go on, but I'm sure you get the picture," he said, pissed off at Cevn's callous dismissal of his feelings.
"But that's where we differ, Keiichi. I have had a lot of stuff happen in my life that was messed up. When I was betrayed by Urd, it all boiled up again. It was like a dam bursting. I was...I just had to get away," he tried to explain.
"I don't know if we differ so much, Cevn. I spent all my childhood and teen years being teased for being short. It really sucked for all three years when I was in high school. In fact, all through high school and college prep school, I seriously wanted to kill myself at times. When I was 18, I decided to take the two years of college prep school, so I could get into a good technical institute. I graduated when I was 20, and started in N.I.T. the same year. Now, I'm going on 25...and I feel *old*." Keiichi said, risking a disclosure of his own experience.
"*You* feel old? I'm going to be *30* next February!" Cevn noted with dismay. Keiichi shook his head at this and continued...
"I first met Tamiya and Ootaki during my last year in college prep school. They were trying to recruit people for the Motor Club when I visited N.I.T. during Culture Day, trying to figure out if I wanted to go for on to college. And over the years, they've become like big brothers to me. But even with my doubts in myself, I *stuck with it* and made it into N.I.T!" Keiichi finished. He wanted to prove to Cevn that leaving like he had...was acting without courage.
Cevn looked at him with surprise, evidently feeling that this information was totally unexpected coming from the happy-go-lucky Keiichi.
"Don't you *ever* tell Megumi about my suicidal thoughts," Keiichi added in a menacing tone. Cevn looked at him thoughtfully.
"But Keiichi, *that's* the reason why I left! I told Urd a whole bunch of things...inside stuff. Secrets! Urd, of all people! And I didn't even plan to tell her anything! I know...and you know...that Urd isn't exactly one to maintain confidences. She pulled my most secret fears and hurts right out of me by posing as my therapist. If you guys ever found out some of the horrible things I did..." he explained, fighting back swarms of fear.
Keiichi was startled at this, trying to imagine what Cevn had done in the past that was so terrible that he didn't want anyone to know about it. For a moment, he felt a dawning sense of empathy.
But only for a moment...
"So what if we did find out about your past?" Keiichi finally replied, the spell of silence unnerving him.
Cevn sighed, trying to slow his racing visions of a dim future. Unlike Megumi's fiery anger, Keiichi's was more subdued. But he sensed that Keiichi's anger was icecold deep...much more intense than his younger sister's.
"So what if Megumi found out about your suicidal urges in high school and college prep school? Could you handle her *knowing about it*?" Cevn countered. Keiichi's eyes grew wide at the veiled threat.
"If you do that, I'll..."
"There! See? See how it feels to be so threatened by the truth...that you'll do anything to keep it private? To protect your right to decide when and where someone should be told? That's why I wouldn't ever betray your confidence...because it would *hurt* you if Megumi were to find out. *Now* can you see why I had to leave, Keiichi?" Cevn argued.
"Not really. But I can understand your reasoning slightly. Still, you *could* have talked to me! I..I wanted to be your friend, Cevn. But now it's all so messed up! And I don't offer my friendship easily. I feel like you trod all over on my back, Cevn!" he exclaimed resentfully.
"*What* do you want to tell me, Keiichi? It's okay...you can cut loose if you need to. What I did...I had to do. It can't be undone. But I'm sorry that it brought you into some kind of emotional pain. I didn't think you and I were that close."
"We *aren't*, after that disappearing act you pulled! You weren't here to see how it affected everyone else. My sister...she really likes you...really looks up to you. It was really hard on her and Skuld. Dammit, you *promised* my sister that you would be an 'older brother' to her! And then you just split from the scene and left her hanging..." Keiichi said, venting his rage.
Cevn looked at him with guilt drawn on his face, then recovered his argumentative mien.
"Look, Keiichi. I'm an addict. I'm not trying to blame what happened on my addiction, but the fact is that I still experience lapses wherein I cannot consistently make good decisions. I know that you can't fully understand this, but it hurts me...to know that I hurt you and the others. Sometimes, the addict part of me reacts too intensely."
"Be that as it may. I'm really conflicted right now. Part of me wants you to just get the hell out of my life, out of my house. But another part wants to help you restore yourself to everybody's good graces. Megumi talked to me before I went to the party last night and tried to convince me not to kick you out of the house. Fortunately for you, she's already forgiven you," he said in a brooding voice.
"I understand. Maybe it's better for everyone if I just moved out. Then Genji can have my room and you wouldn't have to deal with..."
This acquiescence-cum-defeatism made Keiichi hot under the collar. Cevn was calling it quits. Without even trying.
"Waitaminute! Why are you giving up? How can you resign yourself, just like that? What are you afraid of?" Keiichi confronted him. Cevn regarded him, noticing that Keiichi was visibly upset at his acquittal.
The truth of Keiichi's words were stinging him like a cloud of angry hornets.
"You're making the same kind of decision now that you made when you just up and left for China. You're running...like a fool!" Keiichi accused. This assertion took the wind out of Cevn. The two men stared at the ground in silence for several minutes. Finally, Cevn broke the silence gathering around Keiichi's strongly argued point.
"Keiichi, I'm afraid of myself...of being alone...of never having love and respect from all of you!" he admitted.
"You *idiot*!" Keiichi said as he laughed harshly. "You *already* had those things! Maybe, you still have them. Why do you think I'm out here, admitting that I'm upset with you?"
"It's awkward...coming back here after everything that has happened," Cevn admitted.
"It's going to be even more awkward...I'm in your Chinese Philosophy class," Keiichi noted with a half-smile, trying to loosen up the tense mood.
"What! *Now* who's the idiot? Why would you register for one of my classes when you thought I wouldn't come back? Have they been teaching you foolhardiness at N.I.T. along with all the engineering math?" Cevn lightly taunted. Keiichi felt relief at the little joke he had attempted; the tension was slowly draining away.
"The weird thing is...in the reserves of my common sense...I *knew* you would come back!" Keiichi admitted. "Dammit, part of me *needed* you to come back! Remember what I said about Tamiya and Ootaki? About those two guys being like older brothers to me? I was beginning to see you...in the same regard. I know that I lack confidence at times..."
"Keiichi, it seems to me that you just don't recognize the confidence you *already have*. When I look at you, I find that you are strong and capable. Mature, in your own way. I would bet all of Tokyo on the assumption...or a feeling...that *you* were the strong one in the house while Urd and I were away. That whenever Skuld and Belldandy were upset, *you* were the one that had to shoulder it all."
Keiichi mused over this insightful observation.
"Y..yeah. That's how it was. That's how it *always* seems to be! Maybe that's why I felt a little more comfortable having you live with us. You're an older guy...and you've survived a lot. When the dogs of despair start licking at my back, I have *no one* to turn to. I can always rely on Bell-chan, but it's not the same. And she's had to turn to me for a lot of emotional support lately," he explained.
"So what did you do? You turned to yourself! I've had to turn to myself for years, because there was no one there. I knew that there was some kind of higher spiritual force accompanying me...but it wasn't readily apparent to me all the time. So I was alone. And I didn't have the compassion of a girlfriend to cleanse my fears," Cevn identified.
"Keiichi, are you pissed off at me because you had to be strong for her?"
"Neh? Of course not! I'm pissed off at you because I thought you would be there for me, once in a while. And I was disappointed when you just motored out like a chicken-head! You were becoming my friend, Cevn. Is there something wrong in wanting a friend to stay a friend forever?" Keiichi asked.
"You already have the best friend in the world, forever. Yourself," Cevn answered.
"There you go again, turning my words against me!" Keiichi said angrily, feeling the bore of Cevn's words. He knew that Cevn had taken dozens of college philosophy and psychology courses...but there was a time and place for philosophy and another time and place to speak from the heart.
"This is getting nowhere! How are you and I going to work through this? Now I feel like I'm arguing with one of my teachers!" Keiichi admitted his frustration. Cevn nodded his head in agreement. Keiichi felt somewhat relieved that he was also frustrated with this impasse. At least they were a little in synch.
"Cevn, I *want* to work through this! I don't want to have to see you drop out of our lives again. But...you really need to take a closer look at how people relate to each other here in Japan," Keiichi challenged.
"Amae?"
"Yep! It isn't the same social milieu that you're used to, coming from America. Also, you need to promise me, right now, that if something really rocks your world...that you won't just up and split on us. You give me your word, and I'll welcome you back. Otherwise...you better start packing," Keiichi said, establishing the condition he had decided upon this morning after breakfast. He watched as Cevn's face betrayed a struggle over the ultimatum he had just established. But Keiichi secretly hoped that Cevn would just lighten up a bit and try to join their family.
*His* family.
"I guess that means that we'll each be each other's teacher. Okay, I promise!" Cevn said. Keiichi smiled at him, feeling an subtle emotional easement at the optimistic outcome of their talk.
"Keiichi...I want to prove my trustworthiness to you and the others. I'm going to start out now, with you. I'm going to tell you something that no one else knows. I hope it will earn back a little of your trust." Keiichi leaned forward to listen.
"I'm in love with Urd."
Keiichi chuckled at this admission. It was totally funny in a sense. *Everyone* was in love with Urd, in the sense of being physically attracted to her. Every guy he knew that had ever met her was attracted to Urd. Keiichi had to admit that even he was physically attracted to her, despite his deep love for his beautiful Bell-chan. He readied himself to give Cevn a good ribbing...but then he realized that this admission was a big risk for the girl-phobic Cevn. Instead, he started to laugh.
"What's so funny?" Cevn asked, disappointed somewhat in Keiichi's seemingly flippant reaction.
"Everyone's in love with Urd! Everyone thinks she's a babe! So what?"
"No, you don't understand. I'm in *love* with her! The sincere, so-deep-inside-that-it-scares-me-to-death kind!"
Keiichi looked in his eyes and saw the seriousness of his admission. This *was* an incredible admission, if it was true! He realized that Cevn must really want his trust...must really want a restoration of their friendship.
"So Cevn really has fallen for...Urd?" he thought. He looked at Cevn again, examining his face for signs of irresolution. Something inside of him told Keiichi that Cevn was speaking his truth.
"You're nuts! She is a idiotcase if there ever was one," he warned. Then he reflected on what life would be like for him if the most he could ever do was admire Belldandy from afar...without her knowing his deep attraction towards her. *That* would have been sheer torture. But Belldandy and Urd were two opposite ends of the female spectrum. Keiichi felt that the best advice he could afford was the truth.
"Urd's nothing more than a flirt and a tease. You're better off just forgetting about her, Cevn."
"It's too late for that. She loves me too. Something happened while we were in China..." Cevn started to explain.
"Whoaa! You can't be serious..." Keiichi interjected. A moment later, he was listening as Cevn narrated the improbable events that brought he and Urd together. He grew amazed that despite the animosity between these two, they had somehow fallen in love with each other. His curiosity was piqued when Cevn described how the Ultimate Force was preventing any physical contact between he and Urd. Consider each of their natures, Keiichi sensed that this was probably a good thing for now.
"You...and *her*? You're either joking, or insane! And how is it that the Ultimate Force won't let you guys come near each other?"
"Is it that insane to love a Goddess?" Cevn challenged.
Keiichi felt a blush cover his face. Thinking about his relationship with Belldandy, he realized that Cevn was really going to need some help. He *still* doubted that Cevn was telling the truth...for one significant fact remained; Cevn was deathly afraid of women.
Urd was definitely all woman. All Goddess.
Keiichi fixed him squarely on the eyes, evaluating the light of veracity in his blue orbs.
"He's definitely telling the truth...and he's scared out of his wits about it," he observed to himself.
"It's hard, but not impossible, Cevn. I can remember when I started having feelings for Belldandy. It was very soon after we met. She had been so nice to me...but I thought that it was just part of her contract. I never thought that she could feel anything for me. So I suffered in silence. Then when we had a party over here...I somehow sensed that she liked me. But it was a while yet before I told her. But I eventually did," he spoke of the past.
"I've got some experience with loving a Goddess...and I think that you and Urd *might* be a good match. You're both off-center and a little bit crazy."
"Like, who in this house isn't?" Cevn commented dryly.
The two men looked up at the sky, then laughed. The night sky was starting to turn navy blue with the first touches of morning. Keiichi brandished his hand, hoping that a Western gesture would help seal the breach between them a little. Cevn shook his hand warmly.
"Hey, it must be super late!" Keiichi announced. "I've gotta get to sleep. See ya in class tomorrow!" He stood up and walked to his room; a room that seemed deserted now that his divine girlfriend couldn't sleep with him in her present Skuld-form.
Cevn watched him disappear into the house and decided that he was too wound up to catch a nap before going to work.

* * * * * * * *

My first day back teaching at N.I.T. was eventful. I had pulled an overnighter, talking with Keiichi and adding a few flourishes to my syllabi. Today would be rough...I was feeling a strange vibe as I started with four of my six classes. Dr. Kintaro was really loading me up with classes this semester, just like he promised when he hired me. But then again, this was Japan, where elementary through high school students go six days a week instead of five. Nonetheless, I harbored a reluctance to become an academic 'salaryman'.
"I guess Aoshima didn't get enough abuse last term," I sighed to myself as I reviewed the class rosters. Keiichi was in my second class, while Toshiyuki Aoshima had signed up for two classes. Megumi and Sora were in one of my Ethics classes.
It was too bad that I didn't have a graduate course to teach...at least until I got a call from Dr. Kintaro that afternoon. The President of N.I.T. wanted me to teach two graduate classes, one on scientific methods of reasoning and a graduate-level ethics course. So now I had *eight* classes! Four on MWF and four on TTh. I clearly understood his justification...as word of my breakthrough Ph.D. research was making the rounds of academia, I was going to be a receiving a lot of attention.
"Nothing like jamming up the windmill with tumbleweeds! I have to make up for two lost weeks, as well as teaching the extra courses!" I reflected with a full harbor of frustration.
"Could I teach from my own research project?" I wondered. The Scientific Reasoning class was a possible candidate for this. I could teach my newly discovered Progressive Hypothesis and Aquantum Metastasis to them.
The other major problem was the frenzy of emails that were spilling into my mailbox at an alarming rate. I felt a conflicted regret as I realized that "Magnum Organum: First Consciousness" had rippled through the academic world like a brick thrown through a spiderweb pond.

* * * * * * * *

The next day, I received a nice surprise when I walked into my first graduate class.
"Lin!" I said under my breath as I surveyed the seats, wondering why her name wasn't on the enrollment roster. As usual, I directed the students to arrange their desks in a circular seminar-style layout.
Lin was beautiful in her Chinese pseudo-Red Guard coveralls; her generous long silky black hair was woven into a tasteful French braid. She looked like a soldier for love with her soft green outfit and red beret. She was definitely turning some eyes in the class, including Tamiya and Ootaki's.
Once more, I noticed the sempai's pseudo-flippant reaction as I started class, only this time they weren't shocked. They had obviously chosen this class on their own initiative, a fact confirmed by their friendly knowing nods as I called attendance. Besides, they both looked massively hungover from a party-after-the-party. Evidently, they had leftover sake from the fete that Keiichi attended a couple nights ago. I almost wanted to chide them about this...but I knew it was due to exceptional circumstance...it would not be the norm for these two.
After class, Lin strolled up to me, drawing an amused reaction from Tamiya and Ootaki...who were quick to notice her interest in me.
"Ni hao, Cevn-laoshi! I transferred here from BeiDa! I pressed Dr. Zhao, and he arranged everything last minute! I'm going to get my Master's here. Not to mention that I'm the first exchange student between BeiDa and N.I.T.!" she explained excitedly.
"How are you and Urd getting along?" she asked innocently.
"Shhhsh!" I put a staunching finger to my lips. Cupping my hand next to her ear, I whispered.
"No one knows yet...so please keep it hush-hush! Especially from the guy with the white moussed hair and the other guy who looks like a wrestler."
"You mean Tamiya and Ootaki?" Lin put a hand to her mouth in surprise. "Ooops, I almost told them! Why do you want to keep it a secret?"
"Told us what?" Ootaki said. The two grad students were attending our conversation.
"Man, if all da chicks in Beijing look as fine as you...I'm gonna sign up pronto for da exchange student program!" Tamiya announced good-heartedly, drawing giggles from Lin. I resumed my explanation to her.
"I think you can understand why, Lin. But besides that, how is it that you're here? I thought you were an Economics major?
"I *was* an Econ major. I decided to get into the technical end of it more. Combined with my business degree, a degree in Engineering would make me even more of a valuable commodity. I want to start my own business...something cutting edge. I'll be able to direct the business *and* technical end with what I learn here."
I complemented her on her outfit...a solid contrast to the more feminine garb that most of the women wore the first few weeks of class. So many of the N.I.T.'s relatively scarce female co-ed contingent dressed to impress. But Lin was dressing to let people know that she meant business. Not to mention that she *was* cute. It would be interesting to see how she fits in as N.I.T.'s first exchange student from BeiDa. A lot would be riding on how she acclimated to life here in Japan.
"But if I can do it, I'm sure she'll be able to," I thought as Lin walked away in conversation with Tamiya and Ootaki.
Only then did I realize that she had spoken fluent Japanese the entire time we talked!

* * * * * * * *

The house seemed empty. Tomohisa had been gone during the day for the past couple weeks; as he was starting another term of high school. Skuldandy noticed that he was wrought with apprehension...and with good reason. Elementary and junior high school were compulsory in Japan; senior high was a dramatically much more difficult dragon to kill...as it was intended to prepare students for college or the workforce. Tomohisa was embarking on the next tide of scholastic labors, and she knew that the brief senior high spring term created many tense nights for him. He also wouldn't be able to afford to go to a joku 'cram school' in the evenings; thus he was even more reliant on his own initiative. She felt a swell of sympathy for her friend as he trudged out the door. As for the rest, Keiichi, Megumi, Genji and Cevn all were off to college at N.I.T.
"It's just us three, just like old times," Skuldandy thought. She *still* wasn't used to being in Belldandy's physical form. When she took her bath this morning, she was almost disgusted by the place where hair was...the place where no hair had been before. She wanted, even deviously hoped, that being in *her* body was just as hard on Bellkuld. After all, Bellkuld was an adult in a very young woman's body. Skuldandy had almost said 'young girl's body', but these recent changes in physical habitation had thrown her perspective off. It would feel less awkward to Skuldandy if she knew that her older sister was experiencing a sense of confusion as well.
Soaking with sweat in the oppressive late September summer heat, Skuldandy went to her "Skuld's Labs" room. This was the first time that she had been in her mecha lab since the body swap. Everything looked smaller because she was a good 50cm taller than before. Walking over to her workbench, she noted that her tools *felt* different in her hands. The task ahead seemed almost impossible. Skuldandy had fought her terror and sampled a clipping from the black flower that had sprayed them with the potion or spell that caused the change.
*That* had taken all of her courage...and more.
"I hope that I can synthesize some of this stuff...because I would love to get back at that worse-than-worse Mara! Grrrr. If she's ever at Ueno Zoo, I would program Banpei to spray her right when she's standing next to the snakepit. She *is* a snake as far as I'm concerned! But it would be justice served to have her swap places with a python," Skuldandy vowed intentfully. In the few times she had gone on Tokyo excursions, she had never been to Ueno Zoo. The vision of Mara's head on a snake's body was enough to shake her free of some of her emburdening resentments.
After cataloguing and organizing a few spare parts in their respective boxes, Skuldandy sat down in front of her laptop and started pounding keys. She could have used the voice input...but now that she was in Belldandy's body, she had her older sister's voice. For obvious security reasons, her voiceboard wasn't equipped to recognize anyone else's voice. It was alarmed to emit a loud klaxon if it heard Urd's voice. Her agitation was signified by the loud tapping of the keypads when she typed. Being much longer, her fingers slipped typos aplenty.
Gradually, a flowchart formed on her screen. First, Skuldandy would need to isolate the mysterious substance that made her switch into her older sister's body. Next, she would need to analyze its attributes along mundane and divine potentialities. She readily realized that it acted on both levels...and it was *powerful*! Thus she would need to enlist Urd's help with the alchemical processes while she could handle the chemistry. Better yet, with Urd's help, the chemical analysis would be more efficient. Next, she would need to synthesize the substance, if this was at all possible.
To endow the recreated (potion/elixir?) substance with spiritual properties, she would require the help of Bellkuld. Since her older sister was in *her* 12-year-old body, Bellkuld had no powers, while Skuldandy possessed First Class Unlimited License powers...but no knowledge to use these endowed powers. Somehow, when they switched bodies, her older sis's powers didn't make the transfer. Therein was a major clue to the workings of the potion. But it also presented another hurdle, as Skuldandy had only the slightest experience with mystic powers and spells.
Then they would have to figure out how to make the cursed thing *reverse* its actions! Not to mention devising a way to deliver the stuff!
Last night, Bellkuld had lectured her on the need to restrict anything resembling divine powers, because Skuldandy was now a "loose cannon" as the mortals termed it. She had inadvertently branded the faces of almost everyone in the house on several occasions; she also had accidentally triggered a 'good vibrations' spell the first night Urd was home. Bellkuld had cautioned her about the thaumaturgical potential she possessed; which could result in the creation of less amicable spells...like blowing up the house in a flash or turning Tomohisa into purple and orange mandrill. Or even creating a dimensional gateway for a bug invasion. These caveats initially seemed ominous to Skuldandy; but the idea of a multicolored simian Tomohisa sounded fun!
So once she arrived at the stage of recreating the chemical brew, Bellkuld would have to explicitly instruct her on casting a spell.
Then came the part she feared most...Urd.
It was up to Big Sister to administer the cure. Skuldandy and Bellkuld couldn't do this, of course, as they were the subjects of the spell's curse. Keiichi or any of the other mortals wouldn't know how to apply the curative, of course.
So it was up to Urd.
The very thought of entrusting Urd with such a delicate procedure was even more frightening to Skuldandy than the prospect of accidentally blowing up the house with her enhanced powers.
"I..if Urd screws up. I..I could be stuck in this body *forever*!" she said aloud in a panic. On her computer, she typed:

"NOTE TO SELF: DON'T LET URD SCREW UP THIS PROCESS!"

Skuldandy trusted her eldest sibling a lot...but her trust had been significantly eroded when Urd decided to go sightseeing in China. She had spent millennia vacillating back and forth with the conflict of having a wise, yet capricious oldest sister. She looked up to Urd as almost a surrogate mother in some ways: wise, protecting, strong, capable, caring, loving...
"No...Not!" she said in a giggling low voice, interrupting *that* train of thought. In reality, Urd was idiotic, self-seeking, indecisive, incompetent, insensitive and...
Skuldandy stopped herself short.
"Well, Urd's these things...only some of the time," she had to admit. Which Urd would show up the day that she and Belldandy would be ready to try returning to their rightful bodies?
"Yeesshh!" she exclaimed as she switched to video game mode to work off some tension.

* * * * * * * *

Urd was soaking in the tub under a protective veil of bubbles when she sneezed suddenly, blowing a cloud of soapfoam into the air. Looking over her tanned skin, she muttered a silent "thank you Kami-sama!" that it wasn't *her* body that Skuld had been transferred into. Or Belldandy, for that matter.
"Even worse, I could have wound up in Skuld's girl-body!" she whispered to herself as she swam her hands under the hot water. An evil grin came across her face as Urd imagined all the things she could do in Skuld's body that would harry her youngest sister to no end. She pictured Skuldandy turning red faced while squirming with embarrassment...
Back to reality.
"What am I going to do? This is partly my fault...I wasn't here to prevent this from happening to my two younger sisters," Urd said with a resigned voice.
"What am I *doing*, talking to myself in the bath?!"
"Well, why not! No one else is here, except Skuldandy and Bellkuld. Hmmm, how can I find out what happened? It *had* to have been something Mara cooked up...this has her handwriting all over it!"
While Urd was contemplating an approach to solving the problem with her sisters, her mind would occasionally wander to the issue of her and Cevn. Between these two problems, compounded by the issue of the Ultimate Force's physical barriers between her and her new boyfriend, Urd resolved to postpone telling her sisters about her green fresh romance until this crisis was past.
"Somehow, I need to sneak into Mara's lair and find out *exactly* what she did. That would save us a whole bunch of work. Once I learn how Mara transferred my sisters, then I can come up with a potion that would counteract it, or better yet reverse it. Arrrrgh...if only I had my powers. The Big Meany and His ideas about justice! If He hadn't jerked my powers, I could just go over to Mara's and *force* it out of her with a lightning bolt down her rotten throat!" she reasoned. An exhilarating burst of energy filled her.
"Urd Lightening Strike!" she shouted raptly as she leapt up in the bathtub, arm outstretched, ready to pull divine lightning down.
"Oops!"
Urd looked down to see that she had splashed a huge amount of water and foam over the rim of the tub, soaking the towels in the towel basket and almost everything else in the bathroom. She watched as the expanding puddle of water soaked the bathmat as it spread towards the door...

*Knock knock*

"Are you okay in there? Acck...the floor is *soaked*! URD!!!" she heard Bellkuld's dismayed voice through the door.

* * * * * * * *

Megumi and Sora were sitting in the cafeteria, grimacing at their trays. School food at N.I.T. was even worse than their high school's 'chow'. Megumi had wanted to relax the last few days of summer break, and then ease into the new term.
Instead, she had been overwhelmed. First, by the excitement of getting ready for school; then the craziness of Urd and Cevn's tardy return two weeks into the term; and finally the switcheroo between Belldandy and Skuld. A symptom of her stress was the fact that she had forgotten to pack a bento for herself. Belldandy had graciously made her lunchtime bento whenever she wanted it; since she was already making bento for Keiichi, Bell would simply double the portions. But now that she was Bellkuld, the whole domestic routine of the house was disrupted. Megumi *knew* that she would have to make her own lunch, and *still* she spaced it out!
Which was why she was undergoing the arduous task of eating N.I.T.'s infamous cafeteria slop.
"Terrible, isn't it?" Sora commented flatly as she picked at the rice with her chopstix. She eyed the lunch on her tray disappetitively. The fish was dry, the rice tasted like large grains of sand, the juice was flat and sour and the sushi cakes were stale.
"Goddess knows...and I thought *I* was a bad cook?" she cursed her plate.
"You *were* a bad cook, Sora!" Megumi teased, noticing her friend's use of the words "Megami-sama".
"And it's a good thing that you didn't stay a bad cook," Megumi added. For the daughter of restauranteurs, Sora sure had a lack of knack for the culinary arts. She stirred her food with her chopstix, then looked at her friend, whose head was turned away in utter inattention. Glancing in the direction Sora was looking, Megumi saw Toshiyuki Aoshima chatting up a table full of girls. They looked like Frosh; Megumi didn't recognize any of them. Sora had a grim look on her face.
A moment later, both girls were surprised when Aoshima walked over to their table and invited himself to sit down. Megumi gave him a narrow-eyed look while Sora's eye's lit up under her glasses.
"H..hi Toshiy...er, Aoshima," Sora said timidly. Megumi regarded the shyness of her friend warily. Sometimes she was disgusted with Sora's demure nature.
"If the girl would just get a little more *genki* around men, she wouldn't seem lodged with such a fawning demeanor," she observed.
"Hi Sora!" Aoshima responded. "Wow...can you believe it? We're both Sophomores now! We made it past our first year!" Megumi looked at him with open curiosity...Aoshima seemed to almost sparkle with enthusiasm.
"I signed up for Cevn-sensei's class so I can humiliate him...oh the joy of being in my second year of college!" Aoshima said proudly.
"So that's why you're so cheery," Megumi said sarcastically.
"You wound me, Morisato Megumi! That's not the only reason. I have such wonderful girls as you for friends...true women that can appreciate the gracious qualities of my handsome presence."
"Oh...give me a break!" Megumi reacted mentally. She saw the open look of admiration in Sora's eyes. The whole thing reeked of a setup...his cheer seems to be *phony* in some way, she suspected.
His expression changed to one of seriousness.
"Actually, there is one thing that I need to express to both of you. At the shopping center...you know a few weeks ago...I was most rude to you, Megumi. And even worse, I was undeniably callous towards you, Sora. When you were choking in that Okonomiyaki place, I didn't raise a finger to help you. You both must think I'm a cad."
Megumi nodded, unseen by Aoshima or Sora.
I'm...I'm sorry. I just wanted to formally apologize to both of you," he said. Without another word, Aoshima combed his hand through his hair, adjusted his glasses, executed a short formal bow, then left.
Sora and Megumi stared at each other with animated surprise and shock written all over their faces.
"D..did you hear that? Aoshima just *apologized* to us!" Megumi said.
Sora barely heard her friend. In her mind, the apology possessed a gravity of its own...it was the beginning of a new chapter in her relationship with Toshiyuki Aoshima. Finally, the man was dawning, exhibiting a sign of humility and common sense. *This* was the Toshi-san that she dreamed of: a man who was emotionally sensitive to a woman's needs. A man who valued feelings over self-aggrandizement. Morals over ego.
For the first time, it seemed that Toshiyuki had really respected her as a young woman. Instead of being aloof and unreachable, he was being *real*.
"With me!" she thought cheerfully. He wasn't just seeing her as some geeky-looking mathwiz chick in his school, he was seeing *her* for the first time. She imagined him handing her a card was a message written in green ink:

Dear Sora,

I have diligently admired you from afar during our first year
at N.I.T. I have been overwrought with my own fickleness,
thus failing to recognize the delicate blossom fragrantly
coloring this mundane garden called Nekomi Tech. It is
you that I desire. My glass heart being nurtured in solitude, I
daresay that I find that you are the glow that encircles
the torch of my passion....
Your Toshiyuki

* * * * * * * *

"Sora? Sora! SORA!!!"
"Huuh?"
"Have you heard a single word I've said?" Megumi asked, her voice still raised in irritation.
"Ohhh, I was just thinking. Sorry."
"I bet you were *just thinking*! You looked like you were caught up in some soap opera maxxed-out daydream, girl. It looks like *he* did some maturing over the summer."
"Yes...he's...so...mature," Sora commented dreamily.
"She's got it *bad*!" Megumi thought, shaking her head.

* * * * * * * *

"In related news, the owner or the composer of the mysterious "K" pod have not come forward yet. After extending the 'good faith' period by another 60 days, NHK is now convinced that they have made every effort to allow for the owner of the music files contained within the pod to claim their property and authorship. If the owner does not contact NHK or its affiliates by the end of this week, ownership reverts to NHK. NHK and Pony Canyon tentatively plan to market the contents of the pod in various media forms. However, this may be difficult, as attempts to duplicate or download the music files on the pod have repeatedly failed during the past several months. Assuming that they can thwart the so-called copy protection on the pod, which has baffled the industry's foremost audio technicians, NHK may have a mega-seller on their hands.
Finally, a sneak preview of the sixth Star Wars movie..."

*Phssspt*

Everyone looked at me as I sneezed, spraying my tea all over the living room floor. I felt my face filling with blood as I blushed. I was stunned by what I just heard on the TV. For some odd reason, most of us were watching TV in the living room, a rarity in this household.
"What?" a perturbed Skuldandy asked irritably.
I looked at her as she wiped the damp side of her face with her sleeve. My embarrassment deepened as I realized that she was on the periphery of my spray. I had never thought that spraying a mouthful of tea was anything more than something the TV audience saw during a dramatic visual scene in a Beat Takeshi comedy sketch...but here, in real life, I had coughed up a mouthful of tea.
"I forgot all about it! The God's Music tape!" I stammered. Tomohisa and Genji looked at me blankly, while dawning recognition formed on the faces of everyone else.
After I had left for China, I put all the realities of my life in Japan in a mental suitcase, and then I locked it and threw it in the ocean. Now, a forgotten ambition had forcibly reentered my life. I recalled that I planned to prove my ownership of the pode by creating a duplicate and then sending it to NHK. My plan was to market the music anonymously, then donate all proceeds to campaigns to reduce world poverty and hunger. I still remembered Urd's angry reaction to this idea.
"You're an idiot, Cevn. Spraying me with tea because you're absent-minded!" Skuldandy jabbed.
"What are you going to do?" Megumi and Bellkuld asked with concern.
I could tell when I surveyed everybody's faces that we had all forgotten about the God's Music. Not too unreasonable, considering the brouhaha of Urd's and my disappearing acts.
"I have to make a new one...and fast! If I get it in the mail tomorrow, it should reach Tokyo by the weekend." With this brief explanation, I dashed off into my 'hobby room'.
I hadn't been in my "Cevn's Studio" room since I returned from China. My reluctance was due to the fact that a part of me still felt undeserving of living here with my friends, even after apologizing for leaving suddenly. But now, I needed to set my guilty conscience aside and compose some music.
"Did the TV say something about the *sixth* Star Wars movie?" I wondered as I started turning on synthesizers.

* * * * * * * *

Megumi yawned leisurely as she took her time selecting outfits and trying them on.
Genji would wait.
"He doesn't have much of a choice, does he?" she observed, snickering at her reflection in the mirror. She decided on a long-sleeved light blue French sweatshirt and her stonewashed denim jeans. A little retro, but Megumi liked the late 80's styles. She brushed her silken tresses, cut in a short do that personified the expression "sassy". She put on her pink socks, rolled the tops down a fold, strapped a small red belt around each ankle and then slowly tied her Nikes.
Genji had decided (on his own, no less!) to take a mid-week break and had asked her to go see the new Miyazaki Hayao movie. Megumi recalled several Miyazaki movies that she saw in the theater as a young girl: "My Neighbor Totoro" and "Kiki's Delivery Service" of course; but also "Princess Mononoke" and "Whisper of the Heart".
She had read that this one was going to be a return to the romantic-themed movies of the mid-90s. As if this wasn't enough, after their movie, Genji was going to take her to Shinjuku to go shopping! Megumi was thrilled at the prospect. But she also didn't want to appear all beside herself with excitement.
"I've got to keep him at bay by being reserved. He needs to learn to try harder...he's still so shy at times," Megumi reminded herself. She knew that Genji was still overwhelmed at times by the her excitable side.
"I wonder if I should've 'spaced' my beauty pills this morning?" she said aloud to the mirror as she applied the last of her makeup. Megumi was one of those natural beauties who needed only an economy of makeup...she had been gifted with a clear complexion and pert facial features. Her mouth formed into a moue in the mirror, then a smile as she finished tracing her eyeliner.
Genji was waiting for her in the living room as Megumi emerged from the hallway. Tomohisa patted him on the shoulder with a "go get 'er" gesture, much to Skuldandy's disgust. Genji looked over her appreciatively and smiled.
"Why is it that guys *always* have to glance up and down a woman's body?" Megumi wondered once again as Genji offered her his hand. "Oh well, at least it's *my* body that he's eyeing with..."
"You take care of my little sister...and don't stay out too late. It's a school night!" Keiichi shouted through a cupped hand as they walked out the door. Megumi visibly winced at this interruption; Keiichi was *still* pestering Genji about "my precious little sister."
"This must be his revenge for the time I used him when I needed to convince Sora about the beauty spell," Megumi thought as she gritted her teeth with resentment. Her brother could be such an irritant sometimes. A total irritant.
The movie, "Suiko to Bitatsu", was drawing a packed theater. Megumi knew that Genji would be particularly interested because of its historical setting...he had mentioned it several times to her in conversations during the summer. It was loosely based on the marriage of Suiko and Bitatsu in the late 6th century. Suiko was the first true Empress of Japan, ascending the throne when she was 39. But this story took place in her early 20s, when she married the 37-year-old Bitatsu, who was her brother from her father's side. There was a prominent spiritual dimension to the movie as well, as this was the historical period when Buddhism was making impactful inroads into Japan. A strong 'giri tai ninjo' theme lifted the movie's drama to thrilling heights of romanticism in Megumi's esteem...Suiko and Bitatsu often had to make difficult choices between their duties as regents and their heartfelt love for each other. Several times, Megumi gripped Genji's hand tightly as the emotional conflicts of the main protagonists resonated in her own heart.

* * * * * * * *

Genji was really enjoying himself. He was always interested in Japan's history...and this movie was delivering the goods. The well-crafted script seemed to encapsulate the early Yamato State period in all its glory without being pretentious or explicitly didactic.
Towards the end of the movie, Genji felt his pager vibrating. Upon leaving the theatre, Megumi reached in her backpack and grabbed her cellphone; instinctively knowing that Genji had forgotten his. He smiled at her gratefully as he punched in the number.
"Hello?" he asked as he connected.
"Genji! It's so good to hear your voice! I'm back! Can you come get me?"
"S..Sayoko?!" Genji shouted excitedly into the phone. He glanced at Megumi as she beamed a bright smile at him. He felt riveted with the unexpected news that his sister was back from DART in Okinawa. They had corresponded almost every week...but this last week he hadn't received a letter.
"She's graduated the Drug Abuse Rehab Treatment!" he realized with pride.
Megumi put her arm around him and kissed him on the cheek as he told her. Genji felt an almost-electrical energy as she leaned against him, tucking her arm in his. The voice on the phone continued.
"I'm at Haneda Airport. Just flew in. I tried to call home and no one was there, as usual. You must be studying at the library, huh? I tried calling Keiichi's and there's no answer there either. I'm sorry that this is so sudden, but I was just as surprised as you must be. They just told me a couple of days ago to pack my stuff...I'm graduated!"
Genji remembered that his parents were on another business trip to South America.
"They didn't even know that Sayoko was in treatment," he thought, his joy fanned away momentarily with bleak disappointment. His parents had basically abandoned the two siblings to the care of nannies and governesses, so he was accustomed to the lack of parental involvement and solicitude. But this was a major event in his sister's life...and as usual, his folks were more interested in pursuing the Almighty Yen than showing any interest in Sayoko's life! In all respects, he and Sayoko were a family unto themselves; that is why it hurt him so bad to see her life gradually dissipate due to her drug addiction.
"We'll be right there...in about an hour. We're in Mito," Genji informed her. Definitely *not* at the library!
This meant a delay or cancellation of the shopping trip. He had worked his courage up for this...Genji had planned to buy some winter clothes for himself and Megumi. Then he was going to surprise her tonight by asking her to spend a three days at a resort near Take. For over a month, he had been planning a skiing vacation over the New Year's holiday. But now, his surprise announcement would have to go on the back burner.
"*We*?" the voice on the phone asked. At this, Genji's moment of regret was eclipsed by a surging flood wave of fear. After a couple minutes of nervous chitchat yakyak, he told Sayoko he was leaving for Haneda.
"How did she sound?" Megumi asked. Genji felt a strong surge of love in his heart for his girlfriend...she didn't have a trace of disappointment in her voice. Their shopping trip had just been pre-empted and she wasn't even upset! Instead, Megumi was being supportive and concerned.
"She knows that this is really important to me," he realized, filled with the joy of being cared upon.
The drive to Haneda was unremarkable...the airport was experiencing the regional airflight slump that arrives several weeks into the fall school term, so parking was easy to find. They eventually made their way to the JAL counter and then to the appropriate arrival gate.
There was Sayoko!
Genji immediately registered some of her changes in his mind. His older sister had put on a few pounds; she no longer looked paper-thin and sickly. He was especially happy to see that the 'spark' was back in her eyes. Her face had regained its color. He broke away from Megumi and grabbed her in a tight hug. Looking into his sister's face, Genji observed that she looked *different*.
"What?" Sayoko challenged him in a teasing voice.
"You...you look so good! I was just surprised, that's all," he answered. But the discerning nature that fills the heart with magic...it knew. Sayoko had regained her innocence.
Yet, there was something *alive* in her eyes as well...a part of her that wasn't present before. Genji felt a little fear at this 'something extra'; it was unfamiliar, unexpected and *intense*.
"I swear, you've grown taller since I last saw you, Genji," Sayoko said as she gave him a sisterly kiss on the cheek, then looked over at Megumi.
Megumi had casually watched the reunion of brother and sister from a few paces away. But when Sayoko scrutinized her, she felt an electric current run up her spine, riveting her to the spot.
"Sayoko's so full of *presence*...she's extremely focused!" Megumi observed, never seeing Sayoko look like this before. Sayoko, in her own way, had a stalwart visage that was similar to her brother's 'race face'.
"And now she's focused on me!" she thought apprehensively.
"So this is what you do while I'm gone...hook up with Keiichi's little sister? Huh, Genji?" Sayoko stated in a dead serious tone. She walked over and circled around Megumi, sizing her up. Then she fixed her eyes to stare deeply into Megumi's. Megumi wanted to recoil from the close soul-stealing look.
Genji stole a glance at Megumi, remembering their conversations about how to approach his older sister when she returned. Both had agreed that it was prudent that Sayoko be kept in the lurch about their relationship, especially since she was involved with weightier concerns. Such as getting clean off drugs. She didn't need any extra distractions while she was in treatment at DART.
"Just smile and keep cool," she repeated to herself in her mind, trying to maintain her reserve. Sayoko was Megumi's sempai...as well as a very charming woman. A very passionate woman. And now, an elegant woman possessed of sobriety.
"Why haven't you been home whenever I called?" she asked Genji, still staring down Megumi. Megumi gulped, trying hard not to glance her worry towards her boyfriend.
Genji panicked, as years of habit flowed into him...the habit of being intimidated by his sophisticated, urbane older sister. He wanted to push away the fact that he had never informed his sister about his and Megumi's relationship. Especially *that* little detail. Sayoko had no idea that he was living in the same house as Megumi. During the intervention, she was so upset that she must not have heard the discussions about what Genji should do during her absence.
"I have been living with Keiichi and the others," Genji answered her squarely. Megumi went wide-eyed at his frank answer. Sayoko visibly snapped her head to look at him.
"You've been *living* with her?" she said incredulously.

* * * * * * * *

"It's not about me, it's about the music. The music inside of me can only come forth if I let go of *me*. My doubts, my plans, my daily life at N.I.T., Urd and the all the rest. I need peace."
I opened my eyes a few minutes later and emerged from the drowsiness that occasionally accompanies deep meditation. I had dimmed the overhead light and had turned on the blacklight. The interior of my room looked like a starfield; the lights and LEDs on the many keyboards seemed like bright stars.
I had a complex system of keyboards thrown together. Many of my keyboards were analogue; they were sequenced into analogue sequencers and drum machines. I had at least 25 keyboards; old synthis like the Junos and Korgs and the Minimoogs, plus new digital instruments like the Akai S1500 and Casio 505X. These were master-slaved in various configurations, then daisychained into four mixers and finally uploaded onto the hard drive of my Pentium VI PC alongside all the MIDI generators, samplers and digital synthclaviers. Added to this were effector units, like the Sony R11, D107 and Boss SE75, diode matrix synthis like the Roland series customs and several upright 'patch and play' units. There were several other 'blackbox' pieces of equipment that I didn't recognize...they lacked any sort of commercial tag.
I felt a pull, like a finger massaging a wet thread. Envisioning my inner soul as a blue and orange pulsing cloud, I ascended into song. I wanted this music to embody in the listener's mind as an optical kiss...the smell of love as it wraps the night in daylight, the emergent tingling in the memories as joy spills forth...

* * * * * * * *

Sayoko looked awry at her younger brother. A moment ago, she was about ready to throw a sisterly pipewrench in his little romance with Megumi. Now, unexpectedly, her mood had shifted to a sense of happiness. She was happy that her little brother had found a girlfriend of his own. Her mind drifted as a voice in her head narrated a displaced series of observations:

"All those years in high school, you were always 'Sayoko's kid brother'. None of the girls would approach you because they were afraid of me. Or even jealous. You never had a girlfriend...until now. I've had lots of boyfriends and male attention...I wonder if you were ever jealous of how easily romance and the opposite sex came to me. You struggled all along, Genji. Too awkward to say 'hi' to the girls you liked. Overshadowed by your sister. Now you have Keiichi's little sister. I should be mad...and I am mad. But right now, I feel too kind...too grateful to get on your case about it."

Sayoko listened in wonderment to the voice in her head while she looked at the young couple. They appeared so romantically intense and yet so fragile. She realized that this 'guide voice' was part of her emergent conscience; the result of the new attitudes she had tendered while in treatment.
Acceptance. Patience. Allowance. Forgiveness...
"I can't stop what's already happened here. But I'm *not* going to abandon the pretense that I'm your stern older sister, Genji!" she decided. "I want to you to have the best...Keiichi's little sister has *a lot* to prove to me first...before I'll give my OK!"
Megumi looked at the renewed intensity in Sayoko's eyes and cringed inwardly.