Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction ❯ Trial By Tenderness ❯ Part 29 - Afterpath ( Chapter 29 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Part 29 Afterpath



Megumi had offered to attempt to drive Belldandy to the hospital in Chiba the next morning. She planned to drop Belldandy off, then go visit Reiko and Osamu, her parents. Anticipating that many roads would be impassable to her car, she opted to attempt the trip with Keiichi's motorbike.
Belldandy climbed into the sidecar of Keiichi's bike while Megumi mounted the seat. Being in the sidecar drew her into a melancholy whimsy...it reminded her of happier times when she and Keiichi were getting ready to go on a touring ride.
The shock of her loss of powers left Belldandy with a sad pause and deep regret. She felt like a thick dark cloud was hanging over her, suffocating her by obscuration. Belldandy had rarely been bereft of her Goddess powers...in fact, only when she had been 'sick'. In sickness, a Goddesses' powers diminish much in the same manner in which a mortal's energy is reduced during illness.
But this...this was as if one of her senses had been removed! Looking back at the house as they sped out towards the entryway to the street, all she could think about was how much work needed to be done to repair it. The restoration to her own body had been a Pyrrhic victory for Belldandy.
Skuld had hypothesized that Belldandy's divine powers may have been lost as a side effect of the restoration process. Channeling so much power through a divine object like Mjolnir was sure to have rippled the spiritual energies of the two sisters; somehow 'tweaking' Belldandy's divine attributes in some unforeseen manner so that she was unable to access her Goddess powers. Urd added that the very complex nature of reversing such a powerful spell could have easily caused untoward arcane effects. Belldandy knew that the spell was far beyond her capabilities to decode, let alone reproduce.
Then Urd had teased Belldandy, conjecturing that her power loss was due to a license suspension...and since the phones were out, the Almighty simply hadn't been able to inform her of it yet. Belldandy grimaced at the memory of Urd's curt remark...she didn't think *that* was funny at all.
"I guess this means that Sayoko knows who and what we are," Belldandy observed, remembering the look of abstraction on Genji's sister's face.
Megumi turned out of the temple and into a war zone...

* * * * * * * *

As she left the temple compound, Megumi was awed towards nausea by the vivid indications of the supertyphoon's destruction in every direction. An incredible scene of disorder immediately assaulted her sensibilities. People were walking around in the streets like sullen sleepwalkers, picking up personal belongings strewn here and there. Not talking at all.
Many were dazed and crying as they retrieved a smashed kamidana or a rain-soaked family portrait. Misery hung in the air here, as gray as the overcast sky above. Families huddled close for comfort and protection. The streets...didn't look like streets at all!
*Every* building, for as far in the distance as she could see, was damaged or destroyed!
A grave despondence captured Megumi's soul. Ever the optimist, she flailed challenges against her strong feelings of despair by keeping on a lookout for an undamaged building...a single bastion of hope against the wake of Akira's catastrophic destruction. But *everything*, from the smallest cottages to the largest office buildings...was smashed, broken, burned, collapsed, deformed, and strewn about. A few buildings seemed to be protected by luck...they only had all the windows blown out or just a portion of the roof peeled off. But more frequently, she saw the rubble of complete structural collapse.
The sheer extent of the devastation was mind-numbing.
Each of the quaint wooden buildings she had lived with for years...little buildings whose friendly outlines often reminded her of 'old Japan'...these were all but smashed by the sledgehammer winds of Akira. The vision of destruction reminded her of the black-and-white photos of Tokyo in the last months of World War Two, after months of carpet bombing by the US. The only difference was that *this* destruction had occurred in *a single day*!
She looked at Belldandy for comfort, only to find the Goddess absorbed as well in surveying the incredible amount of damage. Makuhari had been transformed into a wasteland.
Every tree she saw was stripped bare of foliage. Nature had turned against nature in its reckless despoilment, leaving broken trees and uprooted plants and shrubs. The late autumn verdance was gone...soaked leaves were piled everywhere. Everything looked gray and dead.
She was forced to make one detour after another. On one main street, an apartment house had collapsed onto the roadway, blocking all the lanes. Many streets had downed power lines and were blockaded by cones and repair crews. Sewers had backed up and flooded streets and alleys. Water was in evidence everywhere: the streets and sidewalks still shone with reflective pools of rainwater.
Empty lots had become muddy lakes...and the stench of backed-up sewage was unbearable. She finally had to given in and take the kerchief Belldandy had proferred her; either that, or get sick to her stomach from the smell.
As if there wasn't already enough to feel heartsick about.
Despite the oceanic dampness in the air and the many pools of water, there were burnt-out buildings here and there. Riding in circles due to the numerous impassible streets, Megumi headed towards the ocean. Her disorientation increased, as several streets were flooded to the point of impassibility. She could smell smoke wafting in the air.
"This is as surreal as a Goya painting," Megumi reflected, trying to assimilate the horrible squalor. What should have been an hour drive to the hospital in Chiba...was taking forever! She had to pull over many times and recheck her route against the street map book.
Oceanward was impassible, so she found herself going back uphill. Damaged vehicles lined the road winding up the hills, a road she recognized as leading to a familiar scenic outlook. She and Genji had come here several times to enjoy the city lights in the evening. Possessed of an exaggerated intolerance and angry disgust, she pulled Keiichi's BMW to the side of the road. Unstrapping her helmet, she got out...explaining to a surprised Belldandy that she needed to take a break due to the stress of her ride thus far.
Pausing atop an inland hill, she could see that the shoreline was disastrously wasted by the storm. Several fires raged along the industrial strip south of the Exhibition Center, sending pillars of billowing black smoke deep into the sky. The Makuhari Messe Exhibition Center was destroyed once again; it was surrounded by water in the distance. She looked north to the neighborhood her parents lived in...and sighed with relief when she saw no fires and little flooding.
Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Belldandy standing next to her, motorcycle helmet in hand.
The two women bore mute silence in appreciation of the devastation. There was nothing that could be said to describe what they saw...that was the job of the journalists and newscasters.
She turned and regarded Belldandy, who was staring at the dire spectacle with a sad expression. A host of questions passed through Megumi's mind.
"Why? Why did the Gods in Yggdrasil allow this disaster to occur? Why didn't they prevent it? Why must so many innocent people suffer?" she thought. A noble part of her being was desperate for answers, for justifications that could somehow weave sense into the shock that torn at her conscious. But she knew that any explanation would be unsatisfactory.
Especially if it made sense.
Megumi loved this city...*her* city. It was her city. She had been born and raised here in Makuhari. A red flash of anger burned in her heart...a heart as thoroughly shattered as many of the stuctures she beheld in the distance. Heartbroken because of the devastation. She looked up at the gray sky.
"WHY? WHY THE HELL DID YOU DO THIS TO MY HOMETOWN?" she screamed skyward with every bit of air in her lungs. As her rage increased, she started jumping up and down on the ground, trying to stamp out the images of devastation in her mind.
"NO! NO! No! No..no..no..nono...noooo...noooo!"
Startled, Belldandy wheeled to face Megumi, who was screaming and shaking her fists at the sky in rage and pain. She watched helplessly as Megumi picked up a piece of metallic debris and started pounding the wrecked restraining curb with it. Megumi was screaming, her Soul raw to the breath as she kept pounding the curb until the cement chipped...and then continued beyond the point where Belldandy thought she would collapse into exhaustion. Finally, she doubled over and broke down into heavy sobbing. Bell looked at her friend...Keiichi's sister...and then knelt down and gently pulled her up by the hand. Then she pulled Megumi close and held her in a comforting hug.
Belldandy was heartwillowed as Megumi sobbed in her arms, crying with a sense of unjust violation like a girl whose only dolly had just been broken by a bully. She felt Megumi's tight grasp, wracked with sobs. This loss her friend was feeling ran *deep*...Belldandy could only comprehend its profundity by imagining how she would feel if Yggdrasil was somehow destroyed.
After her tears subsided, Megumi remembered last night's news. She and Genji had taken turns listening to her battery-powered Walkman in numb shock. Supertyphoon Akira was being likened by the media...to the Great Kanto Earthquake of 1923! If Akira had shifted just a little bit and the center of the storm had hit Tokyo directly, all of Japan would have been gravely affected. Sweeping up from underneath, it struck Tokyo obliquely but severely, causing trillions of yen in damages.
But the Boso Peninsula...was a disaster zone.
"A disaster..." Megumi finally said to herself, her voice coursing with emotion.
Belldandy could only look at her and nod in agreement.
No power. No lights. No water. No gas. No phone. No roads.
No...a lot of things.
"Let's get going," Megumi said grimly.

* * * * * * * *

The ceiling light almost blinded Keiichi as he came to after the surgery. He could barely remember being wheeled into the intensive care unit. Lying on his back, he earspied a chaos of voices as he looked away from the brightly-lit ceiling. With an effort, Keiichi turned his head to see what his room looked like...and realized that he was on a gurney in a crowded hospital corridor. Everywhere he looked, he noticed medical staff attending to dozens of patients.
Then he saw Belldandy.
"Keiichi," she said to him soothingly as she leaned over and kissed him on the forehead. He noticed that she was holding his hand.
"I love you so much..." was all she could say before her gratitude rendered into tears.
"Is it really *her*? Were they able to make the switch?" he wondered as he looked at her inquiringly. She kissed him again on the mouth, her light kiss brushing his lips softly like cat's ear fur. She kissed him, leaning into his kiss with a gentle insistence. At once, Keiichi knew that it was his soul's love that was being reflected back to him. Only Bell-chan could stroke the looms of his heart with such passion...
"Bell-chan...y..you're *you*! You're back!" he said happily. His legs felt like deadweights and he struggled to raise his arms a few inches to try and embrace her.
"Keiichi...rest," she said as she brushed her hair behind her ears and kissed him again on the cheek.
"Hey, don't forget about your sister who drove for *hours* to visit you!" Megumi teased him light-heartedly. Her gritty disposition was shed at the sight of her brother, lying very still in his hospital bed.
"You should see the inside of the hospital, Keiichi! There's little evidence of damage from the supertyphoon...except for the lobby being converted to a triage unit and all the hallways that are overflowing with injured victims," Megumi said sourly, feeling very sarcastic and bitter.
Despite the crowded conditions of the corridor, Megumi felt like she had walked into another world, where things were *normal* again. But this scene wasn't normal...even the hospital looked like a disaster zone with all of its patients.
"Bell-chan...my Lord...look at all the people! The house..."
"Everyone is okay and our home is fine," she answered him. Keiichi breathed a tired sigh of relief.
"I visited Mom and Dad...our house is a wreck, but they're okay!" Megumi added.
Belldandy found herself silently sobbing as the image of Keiichi lying in his hospital gurney impressed itself deep in her heart. He was so subdued with stillness...so unlike the animated Keiichi she knew and loved! She didn't want to cry in front of him, but she wasn't feeling very brave. She struggled to regain her cheerful composure. As her tears subsided, she noticed both his legs were in heavy casts, while his chest was wrapped in some kind of wrapping cloth. He wore a blue hospital gown and a striped robe over it. Several bags of fluids were fed into his arm by an intravenous tube.
"Keiichi...I..I almost thought that I would lose you," Belldandy said. What *could* she say in a situation like this? The powerful sense of loss was overwhelming; the force of his accident had paralyzed her normally animated boyfriend. His face looked much thinner, and his voice was straining with effort.
Keiichi was fighting to stay awake, but the analgesia claimed him back to sleep.

* * * * * * * *

After Megumi left, Belldandy remained next to Keiichi; her bedside vigil interrupted by brief flashes of consciousness on his part. Keiichi was resting after the surgeries to his legs. Time and time again, she tried to summon her powers without success. She just wanted to *do something* to make her boyfriend feel better. But it was tiring, sitting in a fold-out metal chair. Soon, she was fast asleep, holding his hand in hers.

* * * * * * * *

It was obvious that N.I.T. would not be open for some time, so I helped out with the repair and cleanup efforts at home, in town, and at the school. I felt a lump in my throat every time I encountered a family whose ancestral altars were demolished by the storm. It was like a waking nightmare. People were sleeping in tents, exhausted after cleaning up their houses. Several families were digging through the rubble of their apartment complex for personal belongings. Almost all of the pre-modern wooden structures were flattened into splinterboard...making me grateful once again for the sturdy construction of our own residence.
As I walked into the campus, I learned that the N.I.T. gym and auditorium had been converted into emergency shelters.
My office was trashed by the storm.
Skuld had managed somehow to get a power generator working, so we had lights in our main temple home. She had to utilize all the power cells from both Banpei and Mini-Banpei to fuel it. Even though we had power, we still didn't have any running water or a phone. The city sent by a water tanker truck every two days to ration out water for us. Needless to say, we got pretty grimy...and stayed that way.
My new hometown had been devastated.
I remembered all the times I watched disasters on TV. A scene of war in Bosnia...was *over there*, because it was in Europe. Earthquake in Turkey...was *over there*. Rioting in Russia...*over there*.
My "over there's"...had become *over here*.
Every day, I would come home, irksome as soon as I noticed that the house *still* needed something cleaned or fixed. I just couldn't still myself from noticing. As soon as I got home, I wanted to immediately swing into action and undo a little bit more of Akira's damages to my home. I had to ignore my perfectionism...or was it a post-traumatic disaster mentality akin to supervigilance? In any event, I had to just let it go. I planned to alternate my days between working in the home neighborhood and N.I.T.
So this morning, I realized that I needed to *do* something besides undoing the damages that Akira inflicted; but I didn't know what actions I could undertake. It came to me later in the day, while I was helping with a street crew to clean mud off of a throughway.
During the day, I could pitch rock and wheelbarrow mud off the roads, fix the damages to Watanabe Hall and other buildings at N.I.T., and work at home to clean things up and organize the mess. I had been straining myself physically; throwing myself into strenuous exertions as a means to vent my anger and despair. But at night, I planned to compose the best God's Music possible. I've long believed in the power of musical healing. Now that I supposedly had this 'God's Music' talent, I wanted to stop at nothing to create majesty out of tragedy.
With the power back on thanks to Skuld, I elected to withdraw during late nights to the comfort of my 'Cevn's Studio' room to try and compose some music. The tape that I sent NHK was a knockoff...a quick one-night composition to convince the network that the "K" tape was indeed my stuff. I hadn't heard back from them as yet.
But the events of the past few days and Keiichi's accident had shifted me into a somber mood. I wanted to compose some *real* music...something that I could honestly say that I created from the deepest part of my being. So I started to work on it...I didn't care if it took a year to get right.
The disaster survivors of Makuhari (and most of eastern Japan) at least deserved the best I could offer.
"So here I am tonight, pencil in pad, guitar in hand, trying to find something," I said to myself.
I thought of Beethoven's "Ode to Joy". It was a simple chord progression, but yet it represented the emotion of epiphany better than almost any other music I had ever heard. I needed to come up with my own "Ode to Joy", in a sense. Beethoven had pulled it out of thin air, out of the recesses of his mind, despite his infirmity and deafness. And then he put it out here, in the *real* world...to resound throughout the ages.

*Knock knock*

I looked up to see Urd sliding the door open, uninvited. Annoyed, I flicked my guitar pick at her for intruding, then returned to fingerpicking the acoustic guitar. I was trying to get at a central melody for one of the movements. She had basically barged in without asking, and I planned to ignore her in retribution.
"Hey, what was *that* for?" Urd asked in a surprised voice.
"Well...you *did* just walk in without waiting for me to invite you in. What if I was recording something?" She sat down next to me on one of the zabuton.
"You're almost as bad as Skuld! She can't stand it when someone barges into to her "Skuld Labs" room uninvited. But this is different, so I suggest that you start getting used to it! It's my right as your 'significant other' to come in whenever I damn well feel like it, Cevn! Just be thankful that I don't just barge in while you're in the furoba!" she said aggressively.
I screeched to a halt and shuddered...all the sexual abuse bells and whistles going off in my chest, cannonfiring my irritation into vaults of fear. I suddenly felt very small again, small and helpless in the face of skull-toothed dark shadows. I shuffled back a pace away from her.
Covering her mouth, Urd looked at me with apologetic eyes.
"Oh Lord, I'm sorry! I forgot! Please...don't freak out on me now! I've been really lonely...really stressed out, and I just wanted to talk. And that sounds pretty," she apologized by way of explanation as I nonconsciously strummed some chords on the Yamaha guitar. Frustrated, I set the guitar aside.
At least she was being honest.
I wasn't getting anywhere with this music crap. I had a mental image of sound...but it was vacuous and nebulous, as if it was trying to draw me into diffidence rather than confidence. Urd looked like she was ready to do an emotional core dump. I swallowed my bursting sense of impotence and tried to clear my head.
"I wish I could hold beauty in my hands and transmit it to sound, just like my eyes hold the light of *your* beauty and transmit it to my soul as radiance," I finally offered.
Urd's face went soft at this compliment. I was trying to praise her more lately, partly because I felt so inadequate after Supertyphoon Akira. By praising her, I was putting myself on higher ground.
"Honey, I am the Goddess of Love, Beauty Incarnate...and I feel like melting at your words,

Within the depths of blackdamp shadows,
In a fugue my heart wanders darkly
--disconcerted
You, knower of the designs of love, choose:
Is my love reality or nascent dream?

I appreciate your complement."
I had to admit that I was delighted by her poem, and that fact that she seemed to want to play...
"*Me*, the knower of love, Urd? You must be pretty lonely or savantly inobservant. Have you been drinking?" I kidded, knowing that every bottle of sake in the house had been smashed when the kitchen and storeroom windows had blown out and admitted the typhoon's rage. But knowing Urd, she probably had some bottles stashed away so expertly that they survived the storm. I leaned close and sniffed her breath...sensing no odor of alcohol.
Urd scowled at me, then smiled slyly.
I almost wanted to tease her about her verse, and the surprise I felt when I realized that she was playfully teasing me with it. But then I remembered the source of the poem and its allusion.
"You know of Komachi's work? She's one of my favorite poets," I asked with genuine respect and surprise.
Urd smiled a mysterious smile at me. I would have never imagined *this* side of Urd...if indeed this was a part of her personality. Then I recalled that one of her previous boyfriends was an artisan...and then the puzzle pieces fell into place. Obviously, Urd must have an aesthetic side to her as well. Perhaps it only manifested in the presence of intimates; as it certainly didn't accommodate Urd's public repute as being very sexy, very naughty.
"Hmmm...well I guess it won't hurt *too much* to tell you," she said introspectively. She posed provocatively, letting a serious length of her slender leg slip out of her robe. I mentally felt my eyes stretching while my breathing quickened.
"I don't just 'know of Komachi'...I *knew* Komachi! Who do you think was her muse?" she said demurely. I felt my jaw slacken at the image of Ono no Komachi being inspired by Urd.
"Urd, 'muse' is a Western term based on the Hellenic cosmology..."
"Duh! Whenever I would get bored with Sysoping, I would hop it on over to the ol' Earthrealm to see what was cookin' with the natives! Ah...the Greeks and their mythologies...I remember them well. Of course, when I walked among the mortals, they started calling my Earthrealm manifestation 'Calliope'. The rest...is history! Besides, how could you not remember that the Kami served as a source of poetic inspiration for Japan's ancient poets! You've heard of the "Manyoshu", I take it. Shows how little you know! And you consider yourself a Asian Studies scholar!" she said with a dash of smugness.
I almost wanted to slap myself silly with embarrassment...or slap her. Urd was almost ready to burst with laughter; she *knew* that I had forgotten.
"Okay, I'll concede your point. But you know well, Urd, when you flash me like a hitchhiker...I'm bound to forget things! But *you* seem to forget that Komachi was heavily influenced by Buddhism!"
"Just don't forget who the *real* Goddess is in this house! Otherwise, this robe is coming off...and we'll see how quickly you get a nose bleed," she taunted, then continued with her narrative. With this, my insane fears of sexual imagery momentarily peaked into a convulsion...then mercifully drifted away. Urd regarded me with a soft expression of concern until my heartbeat slowed back down.
For a moment, I wondered if she was trying to desensitize me away from my fears of sexual encounters. Make a coy comment, and then follow it with concern or an apology to 'pad' my collapse of sanity.
I was over-analyzing the situation.
"By the way, I spent a lot of time with Lady Komachi, visiting her in her dreams. She reminded me a lot of myself...spirited, passionate, reckless, sexy, intelligent..." Urd said demurely.
"Don't go any further than that! You *know* what happened to Komachi in the end! As she became older, she became hideously ugly. She would approach the younger courtiers, who would spurn her because of her age. To them, she was an object of ridicule...an old lady trying to recapture her amorous youth. Later, she was abandoned: one of Japan's premier poets being spurned from the court! She became quite deranged in her later years. In a land where the life expectancy was around 40, she lived to be a crone in her 70s and maybe even longer. Some thought that this was karmic retribution for her cupidity when she was young. She eventually took the robe and died wandering around Japan. Her passion was offset by tragedy."
"Spare me the history lesson, Cevn-sensei," she said with a hint of sarcasm. "You forget...I *was there* with her! But that isn't the rest of the story."
"Huh?"
Urd leaned closer to me and took on a soft tone, realizing that she didn't need to exert herself to persuade my interest.
"Komachi died and ascended through the Well of Urd to become one of Yggdrasil's foremost Thoughtsmiths, after apprenticing for a millennia. A Thoughtsmith is one of our equivalent terms for what you call a "poet" or an "artist". She paints and sculpts thoughts, then serves as a beacon, transmitting them to anyone that is 'tuned in'. She's been happily in love with one of my former boyfriends for almost a millennium. She and I have a special connection via Troubadour."
I was dumbfounded by this information...it went against all the cosmologies of the Nordic myths! Urd was casually stating that an afterlife existed...and that people could *ascend* through the Well of Urd! I remembered reading that The Well of Urd was a place where punishments were meted out; it was a one-way exit *descending* from Yggdrasil to the lower realms of existence. Exile meant being cast down the Well of Urd to the lower levels of the Earth Tree...never to return.
Urd looked at me intently.
"I bet I can guess what you're thinking, Cevn...but you *knew* that there's life after a mortal life expires...it's in your Enigma book, remember? The part about the Mid-light? The Soul Mirrors? If there is only death...how do you explain The Reaper? A living being existing within the realm of the dead? That's contradictory!"
"Yes...but it *is* daunting," I replied. Urd looked about randomly, then focused an eyelock on me.
Her emerald eyes dazzled.
"Cevn, we have to wait to tell the others about us. My sister is a total emotional riot case since Keiichi got hurt...it wouldn't be fair to spring our 'news' on everyone and exclude her. For that matter, I think we should also consider Skuld...she's just getting used to being in her own body again," she said, volunteering her concerns. That she had seen what was in my heart as quicly as I had touched on it simply reinforced that she was truly a Goddess. I knew that her concerns were both valid and sensible.
"Yeah," I admitted reluctantly. "I wish that...

It lies beyond a simple burden,
The ambrosial love one must hold secret,
So let my soul-gossamer thread
Wander at liberty, wander wantonly,
Breaching regardless of whom it may offend.

I know that in this moment, we cannot speak of it."
Then I remembered that I *had* told one other person. I tried to shrug off my fallow guilt as I reluctantly informed Urd that I had disclosed to Keiichi that I had strong feelings for her.
"WHAT!!! You told *him*?! Do you have any idea how hard it's been for *me* to keep this from my sisters? I know that Bell and probably Skuld will be very happy for me once they find out that I have someone in my life...but yet I didn't tell them. I *wanted* to cheer them up! After all they've been through, they deserve some good news. Did we not agree to keep it between us until we were *both* certain that the time was right?" she said with a flair of disappointment and anger.
"Urd-chan..."
"Don't 'Urd-chan' me, mister! You broke our agreement!" she interrupted, huffling with irritation.
"Okay, okay...*Urd*. I told him because he needed to know. I needed some way to prove to Keiichi that I could merit his trust again. After my little escapade in China, he felt like I had completely abandoned any sense of friendship that formerly existed between us; he was even considering kicking me out of the house! And I needed to make amends. Right or wrong, I made it up to him by getting real...and telling him about us seemed the surest way."
"Do you think he's told anyone?" she asked concernedly.
"No. He definitely isn't going to mention it; I swore him to secrecy and I know that Keiichi is a man of his word."
"I wish *I* could have told someone," Urd said half-serious, half-sarcastically.
"Maybe I'm weaker than you, Urd. Probably, as a matter of fact. I see you *every* day, so near and yet so out-of-reach. And I wish to see you more, but at times all I can do is play the part of my frustration...until we can be a *we*. I'm sorry," I added.
"Maybe you're weaker, you say? Well, you've just proven once again that 'mortal flesh is wanting and weak', to quote Plato. I'll let you off the hook...but you need to make it up to me with another poem!" she challenged me light-heartedly. "And it had better be a good one..."
"Okay, okay! I know when I'm being given charity," I conceded.

"While denying my heart's true aim,
My bridge of dreams provides a pathway,
You and I, yet not alone in quietude,
Might we soon vanquish our saddening memories
And forge them forth into another reality!

The joy we'll feel when they can share in *our* knowledge."
"Nicely met, Cevn. The first one...Tomonori, wasn't it?" she asked. I nodded my head. Her smile informed me that she had met him as well in her earthbound travels.
"And the other one?"
"Just the wandering mind-brush of an ordinary scholar."
Urd looked at me, then grinned and blew me a kiss.
"Don't let your ego get the best of you. Speaking of wandering minds, you're forgetting your music. And here I thought *I* was your muse! Ciao!"

* * * * * * * *

Keiichi was watching Belldandy, who was sedately curled up in the chair next to his bed. She was dressed 'soft' in one of her autumn outfits: a pale green long-sleeved blouse with a flower pattern and fluffed sleeves, a light tan vest with matching long tan skirt, a gold belt and light pink socks...with the usual selection of accessories. Keiichi admired his girlfriend as she slept...knowing that she was beautiful anywhere she went.
After a number of days in the hospital, they finally were able to put him into a room.
"Belldandy, my love...you are *always* here for me. I love you so much! My heart is incomplete without you," he whispered to her sleeping form. A dull aching pain in his legs made itself known, interrupting his reverie. His legs felt like leadweights. Just for an experiment, he tried to wiggle his toes.
"Ahhhh!" he gasped between tightly gritted teeth as the sharp pains stabbed at his legs. Belldandy stirred in her chair, but didn't awaken. Keiichi almost wished she was be awake, but instead he was glad that she was resting. He assumed that she had kept watch over him during the entire time he was out. He pressed the 'call nurse' button.
He and Belldandy.
They had been together for almost four years, through the thick and thin of so many wild adventures. She had been his constant companion throughout almost all of his college career. Despite all the animosity from Sayoko, Mara and Skuld...their love had thrived. In fact, all the adversity had only served to bring his Belldandy closer to him. He knew that he didn't 'own' Belldandy in any sense of the word. Yet the fact remained that his wish had pretty much bestowed a proxy form of ownership over her upon him. The Ultimate Force would never allow them to be separated. But the one thing that he could never influence was her heart. The Ultimate Force could never compel her to feel love. He smiled to himself...she had *willingly* given her heart to him.
Even asleep, she looked like a Goddess.
"Hmmm, maybe someday I should write a book about Belldandy and I. Maybe it could be titled 'The Goddess and I'," he fantasized.
This was incredibly boring, lying on his back, unable to move or do much else. The TV looked tempting...but then again, he didn't want to awaken Bell-chan. Even though she was Goddess, she still needed her beauty sleep.
"Waitaminute!" his mind shouted. A chill feeling froze to his heart suddenly. Belldandy was a Goddess...so why hadn't she just used her powers to heal him? *This* was a mystery! Perhaps he had to be conscious before she could heal him. But no...he recalled Urd mentioning several times that she had used potions and spells on him while he was asleep. Like the time she used her magic to prevent him from collapsing from exhaustion when he worked so hard to earn money so he could give Bell-chan a ring for Christmas. Then the unthinkable question formed in his mind.
"Did Belldandy somehow lose her powers?" he asked himself in a rush of panic. "What if she got her license suspended, or Mara sealed her powers away?" The last thought was too mortifying to even dwell upon for even a split-second. But he couldn't help his flow of suspicions. If his girlfriend didn't have her powers...*then what*? They would be defenseless against Mara's increasingly vicious attacks. This could spell disaster for everyone! His worries gathered to an intolerable level...then by sheer dint of will, he was able to redirect his concerns elsewhere.
"*If* she lost her powers," he reminded himself. He didn't know for sure yet...Belldandy hadn't told him herself. Calmer now that he checked his runaway conjectures, he looked again at his legs.
"How long will I be here in this hospital with these dammed painful legs? If Bell can't heal me, then who knows how long in the hospital I'll have to stay," he mused in his pessimism as a nurse entered the room. The nurse chatted with him and checked his vitals. Noticing that he was staring at Bell, she chided him for his inattention; he was ignoring her efforts to take his blood pressure and temperature.
After she left, Keiichi tried to remember what had happened. His memory was blurred...as if a page of ink had been soaked with water, resulting in indecipherable running splotches of gray and black. He remembered the *terrifying* fall, then two pretty policewomen driving him to the hospital...
But he couldn't remember anything else.
He lay immobile in his hospital bed as disturbing fears kept leaking into his thoughts. He realized that both his legs were severely broken in the fall. Were the surgeries successful? He wanted to ask the doctor, but the nurse had told him that his doctor wouldn't be available until tomorrow morning for questions. The entire staff of the hospital was taxed to exhaustion in their efforts to treat a thousand or so supertyphoon victims, she explained.
"W..what if my legs don't heal right?" His dismay returned, full force. A torrent of "what if?" questions flooded his mind.
"If I can't walk right, will Belldandy leave me? How could she love me if I'm a cripple? How can I make up my term at school? Would I have to become a ronin...a college dropout? What if I couldn't race anymore? Would the N.I.T. Motor Club kick me out? How will my sister feel if her brother is a cripple? What would I do?" His mind was racing out of control like a drag racer without a chute.
"Noooooooo!"

* * * * * * * *

Belldandy awoke with a start. Someone had screamed. She heard another scream and saw that Keiichi was yelling in absolute despondent dread. She rushed to his side. He was soaked with a cold sweat, his eyes furtively darting around with sheer panic. It was if he was having a waking nightmare.
"I'm trapped!" he said, still ignoring her.
"Keiichi," she shouted as she shook his shoulders. "Keiichi!" He looked at her, but seemed to look *through* her; his blank stare unsettled her greatly.
"Belldandy...you won't leave me if I'm confined to a wheelchair and can't race?...and can't walk with you like I used to?...and what if I can't finish school?...how can I support us?...I don't want you to leave me!...tell me that you won't!...if I can't get the use of my legs back, I'm worthless as a human being!...how do I know that I'm not crippled?...why won't you just make it go away?"
Belldandy couldn't slip a word in amidst his outburst. To her, Keiichi was being totally irrational, but yet she knew that he was submerged in a pool of fears. Just like Cevn-san was when Mara blinded him.
But his last question wounded her deeply.
"You have no idea how *much* I want to make it go away, my love," she said sadly.
"I was so stupid! I could have waited until *after* the storm to climb up and get Mjolnir! I'm an idiot...a totally useless idiot!" he shouted, his panic transforming into self-doubt. He started weeping.
"*No you're not!*" Belldandy confronted him, taken aback at his self-degrading statement.
"My Lord...he actually thinks that I'm going to abandon him!" she realized. "I've got to talk some sense into him...quick!"
"Keiichi..." she said softly, hoping her gentle voice would calm him down enough to listen...
"Keiichiiiii..." He looked at her, his eyes becoming becalmed.
"Keiichi, I will *never* leave you. My heart is forever willingly by your side. If you can't walk again, I'll be your feet. If you can't afford to go to school, I can help out with the bills. If you can't work, I'll provide you financial security. Whatever it takes...I'll do it. So we can be together. *Because* we're together," she assured him.
"Why? Why would you want to be with me...if I'm like this?" he asked, his insecurities gainsaying the security that was in his heart. He knew that Bell was sincere, and yet...
"Keiichi, you went out in that storm to get Mjolnir...for *me and my sister*! If that isn't an act of love, I don't know what is! You risked your life so that Skuld and I could be restored to our rightful bodies. How could I not want to be with you...when your thoughtfulness blossoms into such a selfless act of giving and risking? My love, 'risk' is another word for love. I know that you risked yourself because of what abides in your kokoro. Your deepmost heart. You are *not* an idiot for doing so...and you are in no way unworthy of my love! All of my love. My soul, my heart, my body, my thoughts. They're always for you...no matter what. The only foolishness is your fear that I would turn away from you."
Keiichi looked up at Belldandy and sensed her sincerity, full front. His trembling heart slowed down, resting in her reassurance.
"Bell-chan, what happened to your powers?" he asked
Belldandy sighed, then explained that her lack of Goddess powers was probably a by-product of the restoration process. They both discussed their concerns about Mara.
Keiichi was homesick; so Belldandy described the house repairs in minute detail to lend him the impression that he was an active part of the household. She was relieved that his anxiety seemed to flee when they engaged in smalltalk.
If she kept their conversations superficial and light in tenor, Keiichi hopefully wouldn't sink back into the abyss of despair that he was precipitously close to.

* * * * * * * *

The next day, the doctor informed Keiichi that he would be in the hospital for almost two weeks. Keiichi was worried about how this extended convalescence would jeopardize his academic career. He felt a surge of relief when it became apparent after watching the news that N.I.T. wasn't in any danger of opening up soon.
The video footage of the widespread destruction was sobering. "Did I go outside...in *that*?" Keiichi asked himself incredulously as each evening's new centered on the devastation.
Belldandy had returned home with Megumi in the afternoon to spell herself from her bedside vigil. Keeping Keiichi company was exhausting for her now that she didn't have her powers. She could only buoy his spirits so far...and then he would withdraw into himself.
"Keiichi's not just hurt physically...his spirit is really suffering," she informed Megumi on the way home. But there was a voice, a quiet but insistent whisper that kept disturbing Belldandy. Despite her efforts, she could not ignore it. She couldn't lock it away.
"It's *your* fault that Keiichi's hurt!" it repeated, over and over again.
She wanted it to go away, but it harbored around her serenity, frazzing her nerves and dishing out generous helpings of self-blame and guilt.
"If I had been more suspicious when the package came, then the switch between Skuld and myself would have never happened. Then, dear Keiichi would have never had to take such a risk. If I had been less impatient, Keiichi wouldn't have felt rushed to retrieve Mjolnir. If I had been more assertive, then Keiichi would have never gone up that ladder in the first place. How could I let him do that...in the middle of a horrible storm..." she mused despondently.
Megumi rode home, her rankling at the destruction of her hometown making her oblivious to Belldandy's silent tears.

* * * * * * * *

At dinner, Belldandy stated her concerns about Keiichi. We sat for a brief, muted moment...then our suggestions vied for attention. There was so much enthusiasm; a confident measure of how much we cared for Keiichi. Each of us, in his or her own personal style, volunteered time to visit Keiichi and keep him occupied. We all wanted to keep him away from his emotional malaise.
Megumi reminded us that, due to the road conditions caused by Supertyphoon Akira, we could only travel to the hospital by motorcycle for the foreseeable future. I thought these circumstances were beneficial in one sense...I intuited that Keiichi would be the kind of guy whose pride was wounded by the accident. Thus, he would be reluctant to take on a whole roomful of visitors at the hospital. On the other hand, Keiichi's patent shyness might lead him to feel overwhelmed. Either way, it would be countertherapeutic for us to 'swarm' him.
I volunteered to spend some time with him, acting as a tutor and a listener so that he would feel mentally engaged. I clearly comprehended what Belldandy meant when she relayed Keiichi's concerns about feeling like an academic dropout. My depression had dropped me out of school for weeks at a time...these times were frustrating because I was afraid that I would lose my edge, or even worse, my motivation or discipline.
"We'll have to bring school to him," I promised.
"We'll have to bring a lot of things to my Keiichi," Belldandy added to my statement, ever the protective girlfriend. She goaded Urd into cooking up some seasonings to offset the bland hospital food. Then she challenged Skuld to create an interface, so that Keiichi could browse the Internet or play some games on the hospital TV. Of course, Skuld reacted to this with a mixed enthusiasm...in fact, her reaction was classic Skuld all the way. Happy to do something for her sister, overjoyed to be working with anything mechanical, somewhat reticent to be helping Keiichi.
"Skuld, after all our talks, after all this time, after you've sensed how strongly Keiichi and I love each other...you're *still* holding a grudge?" Belldandy asked her with a hint of disappointment.
"Hey, I can't help it. I'm *still* your little sister! That's who I am!" she shot back as she headed down the hall to "Skuld Labs".
"What about the rest of us?" Tomohisa added. Having his older cousin in the hospital was a major blow to the 15-year-old. His birthday was coming up in a week, and it was all but overshadowed by Supertyphoon Akira. Keiichi might not even be able to return home and attend Tomohisa's party. I'd learned from Tomohisa that he had always looked up to his older cousin as some sort of indestructible icon, mostly because Keiichi was the firstborn son of his generation of Morisatos. Now that Keiichi was injured, Tomohisa had to confront his own fragility, it seemed.
All our eyes fastened on him.
"W..what can I do? I'm only *15*!" he said worriedly. His face disclosed that he was stumped. Tomohisa was practically living here most of the time since his parents were reassigned to Osaka. They had left him in the care of his older cousins, so that he wouldn't have to change schools...they had already paid for his high school years.
"Just be his cousin...and be his friend. Keiichi loves you a lot, and he needs family right now," Megumi encouraged him.
A plan was agreed upon, so that everybody could take part in Keiichi's recuperation. I had never met Keiichi's parents before, but I had a premonition that I would see a lot of his parents at the hospital.
"What about his parents?" I asked.
This brought on a new round of discussion, with Megumi taking the lead. Keiichi's parents were easy going by nature, but his dad manifested a protective urgency towards his son and daughter.
"Uh-oh," I thought.
Both Keiichi and Megumi were in love, and to make matters worse, Keiichi hadn't told his parents about the true nature of his relations with Belldandy. And I felt assured in the assumption that Megumi hadn't spoken a word about Genji to her folks. As far as I knew, Megumi had informed them that Belldandy and her sisters were foreign exchange students who happened to be sharing the rent with him. Megumi herself would certainly subject to scrutiny by her parents in regards to Genji. We all decided that it was a time to tone down the boyfriend-girlfriend stuff for a short time, at least around his parents.
"Does *this* remind you of a couple that we know," Urd whispered in my ear. I nodded my head. This would have been the perfect chance to inform the group about Urd's and my little 'change'.
"Should we tell them now...after all, Keiichi already knows," I asked her.
Urd looked at me thoughtfully, then shook her head.
Not yet.

* * * * * * * *

"His parents are so cute!" Belldandy told her sisters excitedly. She was immediately smitten with respect for Keiichi's mother. Keiichi's mom was this little precious Japanese lady, about 55 years old, with a gentle disposition. Her gentle smile and soft eyes strongly reminded Belldandy of Keiichi's own facial features. She was struck by the resemblance between mother and son as they were all gathered in the hospital room. His mom seemed to have some kind of wisdom in her eyes...oddly enough, Belldandy actually felt that Keiichi's mom was older than *herself*.
"Cute? From what Megumi told us, if looks could kill, his father would have blasted you all the way to Vanagdrasil!" Urd remarked. Her younger sister seemed to be *too* enchanted with finally meeting Keiichi's parents; she was caught up in some girlish whimsy of illusion, making things up. It must be the pressure of meeting her boyfriend's parents for the first time...she was seeing everything through rose-colored glasses.
"Oh...Urd, he's just being a mortal father. You know, like it says in 'Modern Woman'..."
"Modern *what*?" Urd asked, not having a clue about what her sister was going on about.
"That's one of those *stupid* mortal 'love and sex' magazines that Elder Sister has been reading a lot of lately," Skuld answered, distaste clearly evident in her voice.
"Wow...is it some kinda ecchi porno magazine? You?" Urd asked, trying to get a rise out of her younger sister.
"Ehh! N..no! Of course not! Elder Sister...are you teasing me?" Belldandy said defensively as her cheeks blushed scarlet.
"Hee ha hee, don't ask me...*you're* the one who reads 'em," Urd observed, pointing a giggle-shaky finger at Belldandy
"C'mon...tell us! What was it like to meet his parents for the first time?" Skuld asked. Urd leaned forward...she *definitely* wanted to hear this.
"Well, I was awake in Keiichi's room when they just...came in. I was holding his hand while he was sleeping. Keiichi's father seemed to get really angry, while his mother seemed to be caught out of breath. His father is short in stature, just like Keiichi. He's still pretty handsome for an older mortal man. Just think of my dear Keiichi with long bangs of gray hair in front, and a narrower face and nose. I sense that he's really happy on the inside, but just doesn't feel comfortable showing it to others. But he really loves his wife. I *know* that Keiichi gets his loving nature from his dad," she narrated.
Skuld and Urd digested this bit of information. Belldandy was basically saying that a mortal could inherit qualities from either one of their parents!
"And Keiichi's mother is a sweetheart. Keiichi gets his kind-hearted nature from her, obviously. She warmed up to me rather quickly, which was surprising. She's not at all like our own 'you-know-who'. When dear Keiichi woke up, he was shocked to see us all in the same room," she continued. Urd and Skuld nodded at Belldandy's reference to Her.
"Hmmm...I *bet* he was shocked!" Urd said sarcastically. "After covering up your guy's romance for over three years...he should have been frightened. Scratch that...he should have been terrified!"
Belldandy grinned to herself, savoring the memory of her darling's shocked face. In hindsight, it was really funny, she had to admit. Urd was right...Keiichi was almost ready to crawl out of his skin, if he could.
"But that's not the best part. They're coming *here* later today to see how we all live! I'm so looking forward to it!" she said cheerfully, hands clasped in front of her breast. "Maybe Keiichi's mom would think that I'd be a good wife for her son, once she comes to see the house...even if it *is* a mess after the storm. Oh my! I forgot to..."
"THEY'RE COMING HERE? TODAY?" Urd and Skuld both shouted in dismay at the doorway, for Belldandy had already rushed out of the room in a flurry. The two sisters looked at each other with dawning trepidation.
Keiichi's parent's were coming *here*, to *our* house!
"You'd...better be on your best behavior, Big Sister Urd! Not a drop of sake. And dress *decently* for his parents, too," Skuld said threateningly.
"Moi? *You're* the little brat! You should watch your own side of the fence, *little* sister, so you don't embarrass us all with some childish antic!" Urd shot back.
Belldandy heard arguing from her bedroom and uttered a quick prayer that it would cease before Keiichi's mom and dad arrived.

* * * * * * * *

Dear Diary,

Sorry I haven't written...I've been very busy.
A lot has happened in the past couple of weeks. Keiichi just got home from the hospital yesterday. I'm so glad that he's back home! The doctors say that his legs are healing really well, but he has to wear the casts for another eight to twelve weeks...maybe even six months! He definitely won't be able to race for a while. I don't know if he's told the Motor Club members yet. Everyone's been so busy with cleaning up after Akira. I haven't even had time to hang out with Sora yet. I hope she's okay, and that her folk's ramen shop isn't a total loss.
Genji and I have been helping with the cleanup effort, both at home and in town. Surprisingly enough, our hometown is beginning to look halfway decent again. The phone lines were back a few days ago, and we just got our water turned back today. That's because Akira wrecked the desalination plant in Chiba, which completely screwed up our water supply here.
We visited the hospital almost every day. Everybody pitched in and Keiichi felt a lot better than he did when Belldandy first visited him.
There's something fishy about Urd. All of a sudden, she's into poetry like some Heian lady-in-waiting. I caught her during a break from the housework composing some kind of poem on green colored paper. She's so weird sometimes...probably off on another one of her mental 'trips'.
And Skuld. Skuld is just insane. One moment, she's acting like a kid; the next moment she's really helping us out. I was out in the front of the house, cleaning all the mud off of the wooden walkway that goes around our house when she hit me in the face with a mudball! I hit her right back and she got mad. But later in the day, she was working hard right next to me, cleaning the mats in the sunroom. She even gave me a backrub that night. The tatami mats stink, by the way. They got soaked. We'll probably have to replace them. If we can replace them, it won't be anytime soon.
It was almost hilarious when Mom and Dad met Belldandy. I took Belldandy over there almost every day for the first week. Mom and Dad couldn't make it to the hospital until the next weekend. That's what they get for only having a car. Actually, their house was flooded, as well as Uncle's. I'm sure glad I chose to live with my big brother...if I had been living at my uncle's, all of my stuff would have been ruined. Dad had to help Mom's brother as well as fix up our home (my parent's house).
I never thought I would say this, but I actually miss being in college!
Anyway, the roads were finally cleared up enough so Mom and Dad could come visit Keiichi at the hospital. I stopped by and caught them at home, so I told them that he was hurt. They wanted to go right away, but they had to wait because the roads near their house were buried in a mudslide. Anyway, they went to visit and found Belldandy asleep in the chair next to Keiichi, holding his hand. Jeez, after three years, my parents still didn't have a clue! Well, Mom asked Belldandy how things were going back in her home country. Remember, how Keiichi and I told them that the three Goddesses were actually foreign exchange students?
Anyway, Belldandy thought that Mom had asked her about our house and she answered something like, "I'm getting *our* room ready for his return."
Mom just about had a heart attack. She fainted right into Dad's arms right there in the hospital! Keiichi told me laters that he had thought Mom was having a heart attack!
Dad was *totally* upset at first, and started yelling at Belldandy. You know, if anyone yells at Belldandy, they're in big trouble. Belldandy doesn't yell back (unless it's Urd, Skuld or Peorth, or sometimes Keiichi). Dad still feels funny about gaijin, especially since Gramps was injured in WW II. Evidently, Dad's yelling woke up Keiichi, and Dad felt really guilty about that.
At this point, Mom calls *me* on my cellphone and tells me to get to the hospital..."there's trouble with Keiichi, blah-blah-blah."
So Genji and I ride over to the hospital, only to find Keiichi trying to explain to Mom that he *really likes* Belldandy. Dad looked like he was ready to fry an egg on his forehead, he was so mad. So Keiichi was practically begging Mom to understand, since Dad wouldn't listen to him.
Now here comes the really nasty part.
Keiichi was really nervous because he was being caught in a deception. Also, Dad yelling at his girlfriend had just woken him up. I think that's why he let slip that *I was seeing Genji*!
I could have killed him right there and then!!! I almost wanted to hit him on the legs with my motorcycle helmet. I may still kill him (just kidding, diary!).
So all of us had a big argument, which lasted for hours. I felt bad for Genji and Belldandy, since they're outsiders and don't know about my parents very much. I don't think that it's all over yet. Dad had to walk outside to cool off a couple of times.
I was proud of the way Keiichi stood up to Dad. I think Keiichi really got to him. The last time Dad walked out, he was almost crying. But Keiichi wouldn't give him an inch.
I felt really scared about Genji. Dad was mad at me too, but not so much as he was at Keiichi. Genji was all shook up; I could see the fear on his face. He was freakin' out big time! I know that we've talked about announcing him to my parents, but in this situation, he didn't have any advance warning. He was really cute, by the way. He was trying hard to be polite and impress my parents, but he turned out to be clumsy because he was so nervous.
Really, I think that Dad was really impressed with Genji. It turns out that Dad knows Genji's grandfather in some way, like somewhere back in ancient history. Like the 60s or something. I can remember Mom showing me photos of Dad back in his university days; student uniform, long hair and sideburns with a headband with peace signs and "US out of Okinawa" on it. I suspect that Dad worked for Genji's gramps. No doubt, one of the things that really impressed Dad, I'm sure, is the fact that Genji's folks are super-rich. Since Genji's the only son, he's pretty much set for life financially. Dad teased me about "picking one of the elite" or something like that.
But what really sucks it is that Mom doesn't like Genji, it seems. I think she's just worried that he's some smarmy rich snob kid. If she only know what his home life has been like. I wished that Mom had met him under different circumstances. I think that she'll come over to my side once she gets to know Genji better. I *really* hope so, because I don't want to have to live with her and Genji not getting along.
But Dad definitely doesn't like Belldandy; he's always been suspicious of foreigners. I know that he didn't appreciate being surprised. I can imagine that it was quite a shock! He lectured Keiichi and me on the need to be truthful with one's parents.
What's wierd is that Mom *really* likes Belldandy! When Keiichi told her how Belldandy was a good cook, a great housekeeper, a good friend, and very intelligent...Mom was hooked. There's no arguing that she is very beautiful, a fact that Mom was quick to tease Keiichi about. Of course, being a Goddess makes Belldandy likeable in any circumstance...she's just so *nice*.
So there it is. Dad and Mom disagree on Genji and Belldandy.
I insisted that Genji and I live in separate rooms, so Mom and Dad had to come over to 'inspect' our little temple home. They wondered how we ended up with a whole temple compound to live in, and we managed to convince them that Belldandy's parents are really rich. We told them that her parents made a big donation to the main temple, so we were given a run-down one to fix up.
They totally bought that story, thank God!
Mom really liked the kitchen that Belldandy has set up. She said she was going to tell Keiichi that she thought he was in good hands with Belldandy. Dad, of course, argued with her. He should know better! But he *was* impressed with the dinner Belldandy whipped up for us.
Genji seemed to make a better impact on Mom when he toured her through the house. I could tell that he was really trying to be super polite. This is one of those times when all that extra private schooling he had as a kid really helped. Once we were home, he was the exemplar of a mannered young man, if I may say so.
I'm really proud of him. He went to extra efforts to impress Mom; I hope that Mom kinda feels that Genji is down-to-earth and not a just a rich snob. But I know that Mom will be watching the house really closely.
I think that Mom secretly likes Genji, but just isn't letting on. Parents are so funny sometimes.
My parents also met Cevn, and that was another thing. Their faces dropped when I told them that he was a professor at N.I.T. Dad made some remark that "he looks like I did when I was in college."
By the way, we start school later this week. It turns out that Keiichi will be able to continue school, since he never really missed any classes. But he'll have to get around in a wheelchair.
Next week, everybody's coming over for Tomohisa's birthday party. I can't believe that he's going to be 16 already! It seems like yesterday, I was babysitting him. It's a surprise party, so I hope we can keep him in the dark about it. Hey, if Keiichi can keep Mom and Dad in the dark about Belldandy for years, it'll be a cinch!
Wow! Guess I really made up for the past two weeks! I'll write again soon. Later,
Megumi

* * * * * * * *

It was a funny scene at the dinner table. We all sat on the floor at the table, while Keiichi was in his wheelchair. He was eating his dinner off of a tray; his encasted legs propped at a 90 degree angle to the floor, which by now had been well autographed and painted.
I was feeling really nervous. Urd and I had decided that this was 'O-Day'.
Our Day. The day we were going to tell everyone.
Last night, we had decided to tell the truth about us before school started back up for the students and faculty in the house.
I went to the kitchen and grabbed a tea service, then nervously poured everyone a cup of tea. For some reason, serving everyone tea seemed to set the mood, even if it didn't calm my nerves.
Megumi looked at me with a puzzled expression.
"What's wrong with you? It's obvious that you're trying to butter us up," she commented foxily.
"Hey everyone, can I have a moment of your attention. I've got an announcement to make. I'm really clumsy at this kind of thing, so bear with me," I started. Belldandy looked at me with an odd expression; it almost seemed that she *already* knew. Which wouldn't be surprising.
"Well, I wanted to tell you all that..I..I.."
Nothing came out of my mouth.
I looked to Urd for strength; she looked back at me with a bemused expression. I remembered our discussion last night...

"...You're the man, you've got to be the one who tells them," she had informed me. It was pretty much a demand, not a request. Yet, in a way, I felt that it would be good for me, because it really was difficult and frightening all at once. Sometimes, the most difficult and frightening actions are the ones that best challenge belief systems; systems that desperately need a discarding. I know that I needed to take this step to discard my 'female phobia' a little bit more...

"What? Tell us!" Megumi and Genji shouted impatiently. *That* scared me...the sheer force of their curiosity.
"I might as well hang it up...I'll never be able to tell them!" I thought sadly as my body flushed with an absolutely hideous amount of anxiety and stress, all in the space of less than a second of elapsed time.
I looked again at Urd for support; this time she flashed me a private encouraging smile.
"I...I...I've met someone. You know, someone special. I guess I now have a girlfriend..."
"You *guess*?" Urd said, mouthing the words at me with silent exasperation.
This was going badly. Now I've waffled about my affections in front of Urd.
"No, I don't guess. I *know*! I've known for a while that she's the most special person I have ever met. I'm totally, madly in love with her. She's someone you all know really well..."
"WHO?" Sayoko shouted, her face filled with curiosity.
"Well...uh...it's Urd," I said amidst my fears. I looked at Urd, who seemed hasty to swoop on my announcement with unbridled enthusiasm. It was like the proverbial dam bursting. She had this grin that was stunning in its informality, yet beautiful.

* * * * * * * *

Urd felt herself wanting to swoop on Cevn's statement with unbridled enthusiasm. It was like the proverbial dam bursting. She had this *grin* that was stunning in its informality, yet beautiful.
"Yep...he's not joking. It's *true*, you guys! I've found someone I really like! A man...a mortal man, canya believe it! The Goddess of Love...has found love! We didn't want to tell you right away because of a bunch of reasons, but I know...that I love him. *Really* love him...which means that we're a couple..."

*Crash*

There was a hanging silence in the air after that crash. Keiichi had knocked his teacup off of his tray. The lingering quiet reminded Urd of one of those scenes in a Kurosawa movie where seconds were deliberately stretched out via slow-motion photography to heighten the suspense.
"Someone say something," she heard someone ask. Urd noticed that Cevn was hanging his head in fear and shame. She realized that this must have been really hard for him; perhaps like the time in Beijing when he told her about what was in his heart, perhaps even worse in some respects. But she had insisted that he broach the good news for a reason. He needed to struggle against all the shame that had been 'put on him' in the past.
"Besides, this way, *I* don't have to be the one who tells them," she chuckled, smiling to herself as he raised his head. Raised his dignity.
"He *better* be dignified if he wants to be my boyfriend!" she thought with bemusement.
Surveying the faces at the table, Urd was totally satisfied with the shock value of their announcement. Her only regret was that she couldn't kiss him in front of her sisters.
"*That* would add frosting to the cake!" she reflected whimsically.

* * * * * * * *

"That's...incredible!" Megumi remarked in a near whisper, the first person at the table to say anything. I knew I could trust her to be supportive and accepting. I looked at Keiichi; he was smiling at me with a knowing, caring grin.
"HOW!" Sayoko shouted. She had only recently found out about the three sisters being Goddesses...
"Rad!" Tomohisa added, grinning from ear to ear.
For the next twenty minutes, Urd and I alternated in our relating how we had met in China: how we had each journeyed in our own way towards the conclusion that we were attracted to each other; how we had broke the news to each other; and what we had been doing since we got back.
"My God, that's *so* romantic!" Sayoko said approvingly. I had invited her for dinner especially so she could hear this.
"I told you that it would be a surprise, Sayoko," I commented. She nodded her head with exaggerated aplomb.
But Belldandy and Skuld hadn't said a word. I had avoided looking at them...in fact I spent most of my time staring at Urd. Her light green eyes forested my unconfident inclinations with support. Everything about her face informed me that it was right for me to be with her...and this had been the proper time and place to tell everyone.
"I apologize for our keeping this away from you. We didn't want to exclude anybody. We wanted to wait until you two..." I said looking at Belldandy and Skuld, "...got back in your own bodies and had time to sort things out. Then, when Keiichi suffered his accident, we had to postpone telling you again. We didn't want to say anything until he got better and could come home from the hospital. I..I don't know what else to say, but you guys are like...a family to me now..." I couldn't go on; my voice was choking up with words.
Skuld was sitting with her arms folded, looking very dissatisfied. But yet she had a slight smile on her face, in contrast to her defensive posture.
Belldandy's face was mysterious.
"But...this is impossible!" Belldandy finally said in a voice that was jammed jellytight with emotion. She stood up suddenly and ran to her room. A few seconds later, Urd and Skuld followed suit, chasing after their middle sister.

* * * * * * * *

As soon as she reached her room, Belldandy sat down on her futon bed hard and started shaking.
*This* news had hit her like Akira had hit Makuhari! It was one thing for she herself to be in love with a mortal. But Urd? It was impossible! Her sister was the Norn of the Past...and that, that is. The Ultimate Force had designed love to only be a pastheld experience for Urd. For a split second, she sensed what Skuld must have felt when she and Keiichi fell in love.
Now, it was *her* older sister...
"I hope this isn't one of Urd's crazy schemes!" she reminded herself. She was washed with suspicions after Urd's announcement. Belldandy knew that it was completely impossible for Urd to be in love. True, Urd *could* feel emotions that bordered on love, but since she was the Goddess of the Past, she couldn't ever experience romantic love in the present timeframe. There was no way that any romantic love that she felt...could be reflected back to her. For Urd, love would always be a past tense word. She had 'been loved', but could never 'be in love'.
Skuld rushed into the room followed a few seconds later by Urd.
"Big Sister, you better explain yourself!" Skuld turned angrily on Urd, while pointing at Belldandy. "Look what you've done to her!"
"*This has to be the most vilest worst lie you've ever hatched!*" Skuld shouted, a paradigm of resentment. "You know how much I hate even the thought of one of us in love with a mortal...and yet, this! To think that you somehow roped Cevn into collusion with your dishonesty..."
Belldandy motioned with her hands to try and get Skuld to calm down. Her younger sister was absolutely livid...and screaming.
"If she had her new Goddess powers, Urd would be plastered with words," Belldandy thought abstractly.
This was *so* confusing.
"Skuld...it's true! Absolutely, one hundred percent true. Look into my eyes as only you can...as only a Norn can...and see for yourself whether I'm being truthful or not. I'll let both of you Probe me," Urd stated flatly.
Belldandy was startled when Urd offered to let Skuld 'in'. She only knew of a handful of times when any Gods or Goddesses had offered to become almost completely vulnerable...open to the Probing mind of another deity. It was almost like Sharing.
"Urd must mean business if she's willing to risk being totally visible to Skuld and I," Belldandy realized.
Urd's had only invited her sisters to Probe her three times in the past. Only Sharing was more intimate...so she had been told by older Goddesses in the GRO. But Belldandy was virginal when it came to the oneness of mind and Soul that is created through Sharing. So she didn't know for sure about that...
Skuld looked at her sister, then reached out with her mind and pierced Urd's eyes with her own special Goddess discernment. Deeper...deeper...deeper she probed into Urd's conscious. Skuld wanted to believe, yet wanted to disbelieve. She just wanted an explanation...an answer to this madness her older sister had just dumped in her lap.
Urd looked back at her youngest sister unflinchingly.
Skuld finally located 'it'...and found to her utter surprise that Urd had been telling the truth.
Belldandy had been watching Skuld's mental examination of Urd.
"Where do the *real* answers lie, Urd?" Belldandy asked her older sister guardedly, wary that she could potentially deceive Skuld, who was much younger and inexperienced in Probing. Urd fixed her with a misty expression, inviting Belldandy to look past her defenses. Belldandy stretched her awareness like a finger pushing into Urd's mind. She didn't fully believe Urd, but deep in her heart, she hoped against hope that her sister *had* found the kind of love she was describing earlier. Belldandy offered a silent bequest to the Almighty...she had always just wanted her older sister to be happy. Urd had struggled to come to grips with being the Goddess of the Past for a long time. Belldandy knew full well how Urd's inability to have a romantic love had dampened her otherwise joyful nature.
"Please, let it be true," she prayed to Kami-sama.
And like a flower, a part of Urd's Soul unfolded for her...the part of her older sister's heart that had seemed forlorn for all these years. The *glow* that was Urd...was simply breathtaking to Belldandy. She had no doubt that Urd's admission was genuine. How could it not be, when her own heart reflected the same glow...the glow that was sparked when she fell in love with Keiichi?
It was all true!
"Oh...dear Lord!" was all Belldandy could gasp as she was swept up in waves of profound sisterly joy. She had known for millennia that Urd was doomed to be alone. But now, impossibly, her older sister had found an oasis for her heart! Her joy was so intense, Belldandy didn't want to withdraw her Probing consciousness from Urd's heart. She and Skuld had joined in Urd's being, feeling Urd's surprise and joy when Cevn admitted his feelings to her...then feeling the wellsprings of Urd's heart burst with an ecstatic and profound heartsong. Both Goddesses were completely filled with Urd's gratitude, her happiness...and her love. Her love for them...and her new love.
Belldandy and Skuld slowly detached from Urd's conscious. Their older sister was crying softly, caught up in the strong emotions that accompanied the moment.
Skuld watched with a benign expression as Belldandy wordlessly leaned forward and hugged Urd, overwrought with happiness. Skuld couldn't believe what had just happened, but soon she found herself in her oldest sister's arms, hugging her tightly, unable to hold back her tears. Her Elder Sister was in a place beyond tears; she was almost beaming with affection for Big Sister Urd.
"Urd, my dear Elder Sister...I'm so happy for you!" Belldandy said.
"Big Sister, I'm glad for you too...even if it's a mortal that you picked!" Skuld added.


* * * * * * * *

Keiichi had watched the entire drama unfold. Having foreknowledge of Cevn's 'news', he was fully aware that this could turn into a drama of operatic proportions. He was amused by Cevn's clumsy attempts to tell everyone: but then he soberly remembered how fragile he had felt when he finally told Megumi about Belldandy.
"And Cevn had told us *all*," he acknowledged. Then, caught up in his own excitement, he had knocked the damn teacup off of his tray! Cevn looked shattered when the Goddesses suddenly bagged out of the room. Keiichi felt a stirring of compassion, and knew that he needed to comfort his friend.
Shocked by the abrupt departure of the Goddesses, Cevn immediately thought that this symbolized an explicit rejection of him, of his relationship with Urd. After all this waiting, after all this planning and consideration of everyone's feelings...to be rejected so completely! In his mind, he could hear Belldandy and Skuld telling Urd that she shouldn't have anything to do with him.
He felt a hand on his shoulder.
"It's okay," Keiichi offered. "It really is. They need to work this thing out on their own. It's *not* you."
"Hey, they're women! Whaddya expect?" Tomohisa added, drawing ireful glances from Megumi and Sayoko.
Sayoko was touched by the fact that Cevn had invited her over so she could witness this important admission on his part. She had stayed clean since coming back from Okinawa and was really appreciating her recovery...and the fact that she had a teacher who was also a mentor of sorts for her. Besides, Cevn's description of his internal struggles...knowing how he felt about Urd and yet being too messed up to tell her; it was totally innocent and romantic at the same time.
It reminded her of another man; a man of strength on the outside who was figuratively a shy boy on the inside. After her treatment, Sayoko had expected her admirer to come on really strong. Instead, his overtures to her had been mellowly tentative. She decided that she would talk to her known admirer when school started up again...he too had been romantic and thoughtful like Cevn-sensei.
To her, Cevn's story was the kind of story every woman secretly wanted to hear. A man who was truly capable of love...and yet had to surmount all sorts of personal obstacles to make his feelings known. Not the easy, sleazy manner of men who were out for sexual conquest, or the empty words of men whose insincerity was the source of many broken feminine hearts.
Megumi grabbed Cevn's hand and simply said, "Let's talk."
She cast a sidelong glance at Sayoko, hinting that she should accompany them. Soon, they were seated on the front porch, looking at the late October sky. The air was getting chilly, probably only 8 or 9 degrees centigrade. There would be no Halloween in two days...Akira had seen to that.
"We need to pep talk this guy," Megumi told Sayoko. Megumi sensed that this situation needed a woman's touch...the kind of touch that two close friends could offer. It was time for his 'adopted little sister' to take the lead and set him straight.
"Look, Cevn. Urd said that she's in love with you. You need to trust that," Sayoko said. This blunt statement said exactly what was on Megumi's mind. Megumi watched as he struggled, then started crying. But the gloom seemed to be leaving him.
The two women challenged him, encouraged him, cajoled him, and listened. Eventually, their efforts took a toll on his misery. Bit by bit, he seemed to surface from an ocean of despair. Megumi and Sayoko almost felt a sense of teamwork present in their efforts...it made them try even harder as Cevn came back to himself.
"Somehow, someday," they both told him.
Cevn realized that things were totally out of his control when Megumi and Sayoko dragged him out on the porch. From disbelief, they forged confidence. From despair, they pointed him towards optimism. From fear, they offered him faith.
"With *this* kind of persuasion, how can I not just give in and trust in the moment," he thought gratefully as his two friends urged him to relinquish his self-pity. In a most humorless situation, he suddenly found his lack of trust laughable.
"You guys...are incredible!" was all he could say before he started giggling giddily. Soon, all three were laughing.
"You know, Cevn...they *have* to say something! And I don't think Urd will let them get between this thing you two have for each other. I know...I'm a lot like her!" Sayoko joked.
"Me too! Look what's been going on with my parents once they found out about Genji!" Megumi added.
Surprisingly, Sayoko didn't even glance a challenge at her.

* * * * * * * *

With his sister and Sayoko outside talking to Cevn, and Bell-chan and her two sisters inside their bedroom talking it over, Keiichi was left with Genji and Tomohisa. The two younger guys were animatedly discussing the bombshell news that Cevn and Urd had dropped at dinner.

*Ring*

Keiichi wheeled over to the phone and picked it up.
"Is B'dandy available for the phone?" a polite female voice said on the other end.
A voice that Keiichi had never heard before.

* * * * * * * *

Urd was worried about how Cevn had reacted to Belldandy's sudden departure. In fact, *she* herself didn't know what to make of it. Her worst fears centered around the possibility that Belldandy would react to her romance with Cevn in the same manner that Skuld had reacted to Belldandy and Keiichi's love. It would be horrible to have *both* her younger sisters poised against her; both jealous because a mortal man had taken a piece of her heart.
She felt relieved after Skuld and Belldandy had filed through her emotions and being. It was a huge risk on her part, letting her sisters Probe her...but she trusted that the sincerity of her feelings would convince them that she was in fact deeply romantically wrapped around her new boyfriend.
"With that out of the way, maybe I can work on convincing him to get sexual with me!" she thought to herself excitedly.
But realistically, she realized that this would be much harder with Cevn than it was with Keiichi and Belldandy. Keiichi didn't have years of horrible sexual abuse to pincushion his libido.
After yet another crying jag, the three sisters were exhausted. Urd didn't expect so much joy from both of her sisters. Belldandy and Skuld both were *very* happy for her, if even a bit confused about the 'how and whys' of her and Cevn.
Solemnly, she told them about the phenomena of the Ultimate Force and its enigmatic 'barrier' that prevented her and Cevn from even touching. This news seemed to stun her two younger sisters...nothing like this had ever been recorded in the annals of Yggdrasilian history. It didn't conform to any know UF rules. It didn't conform to The Rules at all.
Looking at her sisters, Urd knew that their minds were racing as well. Thus, when the knock came, none of them heard it.
There was a persistent quiet rapping at the door.
When she noticed it, Urd dismissed it as another new rattling noise. Since Akira, the house had acquired all sorts of new creaks and rattles. This was simply one of them.

*knockknockknockknock*

"Come in," Urd shouted, realizing that someone was at the door. She watched as the shoji slipped open and Keiichi rolled his wheelchair in.
"Are you guys okay?" he asked. All three Goddesses nodded at him.
Keiichi knew in an instant that there had been some intense sisterly love in the room. The air was charged with feminine emotions and intuitions.
"Belldandy...there's someone on the phone for you," he said in a strangely affected voice.
"For me? Who is it?"
"She says she's your mother."

* * * * * * * *