Avatar The Last Airbender Fan Fiction ❯ Precious Illusions ❯ Mama ( Chapter 2 )

Disclaimer: Is not mine, I could never make up something so beautiful and predictable as it, though I do wish I had Zuko (I would lock him in my room and never leave). It belongs to Nickelodeon (I think) and its creators Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko.

 

Warnings: language (the f word is used twice in the fic), a bit of violence, emotional turmoil, insanity, yuri (light and far away), shoujo ai, mentions of shounen ai/yaoi. Original characters, made up avatar creatures (that's all the warning I can think of off the top of my head).

 

Song: Mama by My Chemical Romance

 

 

Chapter Two

Mama

 

One Year Later

 

Azula wasn't sure where she was or how long it had been since her escape. Since she had earned her freedom she had spent it being hunted by the people sent by her brother to chain her in the cold cell again. She had killed a lot of the bastards that had tried to get her. They had been mostly bounty hunters since those were the only people who dared to face her. There had been a few close encounters with the Avatar, but she had always slipped away before she had to directly confront him. Because of the Avatar turning the table on her, Azula was unable to hunt down the Avatar, it seemed that everywhere she went there was something protecting his loved ones. That or they were dead already, like that damn King Bumi. Her revenge hadn't even started after all this time; she hadn't even gotten friends, let alone followers. People tended to stay clear of her. Anyone that did help would eventually learn who she was, become disgusted with personality, or just give up.

 

So, now she was somewhere near where the air nomads used to live. She was hungry, her clothes hung loosely and tattered on her body, and her hair was matted. She knew she was a mess. All the former princess could think was about was the betrayal, what she had suffered through, and how she should have just killed the lot of them when she had the chance, her damn friends included. Her mother should have been proof that everyone would turn against her.

 

The former fire princess pushed through the tangled brambles, some of her hair got caught and she just stopped herself from lashing out at the brambles with her fire. She didn't need to start a forest fire and give away her position. She needed to do… something, get some followers, because that seemed to be what was working against the former princess at the moment. She snarled strained against the twig, her hair was a mess, it wasn't getting better, she screamed in frustration. She refused to cry. The one time she had done that was in front of her brother and that water tribe twit, they had looked at her with pity and before she knew it she was imprisoned.

 

Azula pulled at her captor, biting her tongue, but cursing inwardly and promising death to the damn thing that dared to do this to her. Finally she found a knife and cut the offending hair away. Now free she shook out her hair with a sigh and attacked the tree, which did nothing but make her knife a little duller. Who could she trust? Well, there's always her ghost, but ever since the Avatar had air bended her away Azula had yet to see aspiration again. It only fueled her rage and hatred for the Avatar. She hated him with everything she was. She couldn't give up.

 

Where could she go? Someone was following her; she knew someone was following her, which meant that she couldn't cook any meat. She didn't know the area, so she wasn't sure what was edible in this part of the world besides the basics. Maybe she could scrounge; her studies must have taught her enough to know some berries and roots that were edible in this area. No one believed in charity these days, not even enough for a girl who looked like her or who could so little conventional things she could.

 

She was useless at home making. She didn't know how to cook, how to clean, how to watch over children, how to serve with a gentle smile. All she knew was how to be in charge, fire bending, bending people to her will, and how to rule. But she was so pathetic, and not in the cute way but in the crazy useless way that made people back away from someone. Even those with kind hearts looked past her to their next charity case.

 

Not that Azula needed bleeding hearts. She needed people who she could rally against the Avatar, though she was strong she wasn't that she could take everyone around him, and she had already ruled out picking them off. That needed coordination and people. She needed an underground that was dedicated to her. But people that would have stood behind her father wanted nothing to do with Azula. It didn't help that her face was plastered everywhere in the Fire and Earth Kingdom. No was willing to risk being seen with her, much less associating. The most dangerous man in the world was after her after all.

 

Azula forced herself through the forest; the branches broke clumsily under her feet. She was weak, no she was hungry, she was starving. Losing herself she shoved the closest foliage in her mouth, she caught herself and forced herself to spit it out. Real food, something she knows is edible. That's what she needed.

 

“You've ruined you hair again,” came the gentle reprimand.

 

“Mother,” said Azula with hidden venom.

 

“Hunny, you should return to your brother,” said the soft voice.

 

“And let him capture me again?” demanded Azula. “I think not mother, I'm free and I intend to bring an end to your precious son.”

 

“I love you Azula, you are of my flesh, my darling daughter,” said her mother near her ear. Anger coursed through anger and she lashed out. The voice had sounded so comforting like her mother was close to hugging her, but that would never happen. Her blue fired hand cut through the air behind her and Azula took saw nothing.

 

“Princess Azula, we are concerned,” echoed two elderly voices.

 

“Leave me be you old hags!” demanded Azula making her way over a rotting log.

 

“You seem to be coming apart,” they said in unison.

 

“Go back to my brother you traitors, I'm only looking for people who will help me!” shouted Azula.

 

“Please Princess!” Azula pushed the voices away. She didn't need any help. She was perfectly sane. She just needed them to leave her the hell alone.

 

“Who's there?” demanded the girl suddenly, the two elderly voices completely silent now that she was on the alert. Her gold eyes looked frantically from side to side. Someone was nearby. “I'm warning you!” She shouted getting into fighting position. Still, no one came out. Azula started to feel her world tip and tried to stay focused, but the edge of her eyes kept dulling, until she was falling into darkness with no means to pull herself up.

 

-----

 

“Saki, are you sure you've got everything?” the demand was firm, and Saki sighed in exasperation, her mother was so overprotective.

 

“Yes mother,” she said and shock her head. “Plus, you know the rules; I'm not supposed to bring much with me anyway. This is a spirit quest.”

 

“I know dear, it's just that, after…” Saki sighed at her mother's look of remorse. She went over and kissed her on the cheek.

 

“I'll be careful mother I promise,” she smiled at her mother's wary smile.

 

“You've just been our worry child. I remember how worried we always were when you slept. You've got to be the deepest sleeper I've ever met you hardly breathe when asleep,” she ran a hand through her daughters sun kissed hair. “Oh, baby, I know that you can reach to the stars and back, it's just these times are so uncertain. I want you to know how to be grounded.”

 

“And this way I'll learn,” promised Saki. “Oh, mother, please don't cry, I'll be fine. I'm even bringing my `ridiculous walking stick.'”

 

“That doesn't make me feel better!” said her mother almost in tears.

 

“How about I stay and have lunch with you?” asked Saki.

 

“Perfect, make the tea dear,” all of sudden her mother was business. Saki giggled and just watched her mother for a second. Her mother was strong, if not a little flaky. She looked around their house. Crumbling stones walls and a straw ceiling. The floor was plain old dirt. Her house smelled of herbs and vegetables. All the lovely things from the garden. Her mother would have plenty to eat during their brief winter this year.

 

She stepped into the kitchen, no door, just a little indention to mark the difference, the house only had two other rooms, before they'd been bedrooms, but since - then - it had become an extra place for food storage, drying out herbs, holding various knick knacks that women collected, it even had her mother's weaving, since the woman hardly worked on it.

 

“Hurry up girl,” shouted her mother. Saki sighed and, shaking her head, went into the kitchen to make tea. She hoped that this journey would help her find her place or settle her soul. She loved her mother dearly and thought she was a wonderful woman who was strong and proud. She'd raised her brother and her by herself since her father was never around, always traveling around. It seemed she had her father's curse. She didn't feel right just staying at home. Even if it was like her mother did, supporting herself on her own farm and learning to hunt and keep a house and children in line. She didn't think she was better than her mother, just that she had something else she had to do or else constantly feel this itch that existed under her skin.

 

“You're staying for lunch, right?” her mother's voice was still strong, but it cracked as she talked. Saki smiled gently.

 

“I promise.”

 

Lunch was a quiet affair. Both ate. Saki's mother kept sighing and sniffling, and Saki was sure she was running low on how much of her mother's emotional overload she could take, especially without becoming depressed herself. But no second thoughts, this was journey. She'd come back home in a year, either to just check in or to start her own little house nearby. It depended on what she found out during her journey. It was customary for her sort of people to go on a spiritual journey. They were supposed to find themselves during this time. To start out with little more than the clothes on their back and a walking stick. Of course Saki's mom had packed her a few meals, extra clothes, and forced her to take it in a pack. She also had a feeling her mother had probably hidden coins in various places. She wanted her only child to make it.

 

Saki slipped on some soft shoes that she couldn't even remember getting it had been so long ago and started to leave. She waved to the wooly-pigs and pickens, the only animals visible to her from the front of their house. Her feet hardly touched the ground as she left. She only had two extra things, these things that her brother would have taken with him but she was expected to leave behind, a hunting knife a bow with a quiver of arrows.

 

The thing was she was expected to do, like any good follower of her power, was to become a vegetarian. She refused, her favorite foods were made with meat, and while most said it was still a meal when the meat was gone, she had always felt the meat made the meal no matter how little they had to spare. So she was going hunting while she was on her journey. Screw tradition, the reason she would have vegetarian hardly mattered in this day-an-age seeing how she couldn't chance it with the whole Fire Lord nonsense.

 

She headed down the long treaded path, no reason to go way out into these woods. They were thick and damp. She lived near the bottom of a mountain where the soil was rich. She planned on heading north, where the trees thinned and there was less beauty but more edible food and the like. More animals to hunt that weren't poisonous to eat. She knew the difference, of course, it just some of the rumors made her toes curl. That and she could taste fish that was from the ocean if she headed in the right direction. That was supposed to taste wonderful. Not that her mind only revolved around food, it was just she had always eaten the same stuff, living where she did and being as poor as they were. So she was excited to taste new things, and she wasn't going to deprave her taste buds of anything delicious.

 

She had been walking a few hours before she heard it. An angry cry split the woods and scattered many reptile birds and winged lemurs. She wondered if she should help the person when another angry scream was carried in the air. Saki was determined to go now. The girl (by the scream) was probably in trouble. She had probably come over in fear of the Fire Nation and had tried to navigate her way through the forest. The only problem was that these woods weren't frequently that often and many times the path almost became indecipherable and a traveler not used to the area could easily go off the path and find themselves in the middle of nowhere.

 

She made her way through the thick woods, sometimes having to use her knife to get through the thicker parts. She wished she could just take to the sides, but she had been taught by her mother and the village elders never to do so again. That had been a lesson she never forgot. One of the three times she had met the elders of the closest village. She shivered at the memory and gripped her staff closer to her, it was the only thing that made her hope, fashioned by the instructions that she had found almost destroyed in the closest air bending temple. Such a little thing that meant so much to the people in her region.

 

“Who's there?” the girl looked insane. Her dark brown hair was tangled with leaves and brush and leaves. Her clothes were threadbare and ripped. She had wild thin gold eyes that took in everything as if it were the enemy. She was gaunt, hungry, and very probably insane, though whether it was permanent or just a stress/situation thing Saki couldn't be sure.

 

“I'm warning you!” Saki watched in morbid fascination as the paranoid girl looked around her surrounding, her whole body ready to fight. But she moved quickly when the other just slumped to the ground in a dead faint.

 

----

 

Azula woke up to the hog monkey roasting on a spit. She blinked and tensed in anticipation, she needed to be ready for whoever came.

 

“You waking up?” Azula almost groaned. Apparently she had become lax over the last year if she woke up so that everyone knew. “That's good; you were starting to worry me. It's morning now. I was hoping that you could eat last night, but, well, you were sleeping so well and had shadows under your eyes so I thought a good sleep would be good.”

 

“Who do…” Azula trailed off and blinked a few times. Perhaps she was seeing things. “You're my ghost, but more solid, colorful.”

 

“What?” green eyes looked down at Azula in confusion. She was a slim creature, with freckled skin and red brown hair. Her nails had dirt in them, and her hair was cut in ringlets at her ears. She was nimble and long fingered. Her clothes were drab, and the only thing of real value was the bracelet around her wrist.

 

“My ghost, except you're solid,” Azula smiled, she was back, in some form. Perhaps she was with her like her mother and the others that followed her around. Still, her ghost girl seemed a little more solid, like she was finally here with her instead of just a waif who liked to visit her when she became tired.

 

“Well, so you don't keep calling me `My Ghost' my name is Saki. What's yours?” asked the spirit, now not transparent girl.

 

“Um, Mai,” said Azula, uncertain.

 

“Right, well, when you're more comfortable you can tell me your real name, or when you remember it, whichever is stopping you,” said the girl in slight confusion before smiling and going to check on the meat.

 

“What makes you think that I am lying?” demanded Azula in her most hotly voice.

 

“Well, Miss Priss,” said the girl coming over with some meat. “You aren't that hard to read.”

 

“I am not…” Azula spluttered and the girl - Saki giggled, Azula glared, but hope sprang into her heart. The girl wasn't affected by her, but still wasn't disgusted with her but found her anger amusing.

 

“Come now, don't give me that look, I used to do it to, well,” she looked confused and then smiled. “Here have some…”

 

Azula gasped.

 

“Yes dear, she's solid, unlike us, she can be a comfort to you,” Azula looked up to see her mother by the fire. “So I will leave you, I hope you let her in enough to let her heal you.”

 

“No, mother, damn it, you can't leave me, I can't prove… I can't... you can't leave!” Azula was angry, how dare her mother do this. How dare her mother follow her all the way here and then leave her when she finally found away to prove what she had always known!

 

“Mai, there's no one…” Saki's voice was soft and kind.

 

“Of course you can't see her,” snapped the former princess. “You're solid now. Mother don't you dare, don't you dare do it again!”

 

“I believe in you my daughter, you can rise above all this, goodbye.” Ursa started to disappear.

 

“No, mother, come back you bitch! Don't you dare go to brother! He's already precious in your eyes! Mother, damn you, damn You!” Azula screamed her body shook. She hated this. Her mother always preferred her brother, now at the first sign that Azula could be supported by someone else her mother left. She always hated her, she had hated that she wasn't more like a girl, that she had a backbone.

 

“Shh, come on Mai, your mother isn't here but I am, and I won't just leave you, I'll drag you everywhere with me I promise,” said Saki, almost sounding excited by the prospect.

 

“How can I trust you?” asked Azula, her voice cutting like ice. “You've left me before.”

 

“No, my spirit, or hallucination left you,” said Saki, running her hand over Azula's head. “But I'm here for you now. I'm sorry you thought I left you, though.”

 

“Don't patronize me,” said Azula pushing the girl's arm away from her and sitting up, but she suddenly felt dizzy and had sit back because she was dizzy. “Plus it was that moronic boy's fault you disappeared. And why are you taking me in so easily.”

 

“It's my spirit journey. The spirits obviously gave me you as part of me finding myself,” said the girl with a smile. “Plus, you're entertaining in a crazy sorta away. And I'm not sure how but I am sure that you'll help me as much as you help me. Now, eat up, we'll be moving out soon, sorry we don't have any ostrich horses, but this is a too mountainous area. Can't wait to taste the food up north, we'll have to get some money, but I'm sure I'll think us up away. Come on Mai, we need to start going, I only have a year to see the world and find my place in it.”