Ayashi No Ceres Fan Fiction ❯ Rebirth ❯ Chapter 5

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

No matter what my mother did as a profession, she really was a good person. I just have this strong feeling that she never hit me again, and that for the most part, she was the most caring person in my life. So what if she fucked old men for cash? She raised me, nurtured me. She didn't deserve to die so young.

How the hell did she die anyway? I rack my brain, searching for the answer, but none comes. My own mother... and all I know of her is her job and that she's dead. I have one measly little memory of her. One! And I don't even know why it is I'll never be able to make another with her. Mom... I miss you so much.

My eyes grow moist, and my throat becomes choked on tears. Mother... I don't know how you died. I don't even know your name!

Ceres.

The word pops into my head, spoken in my mother's calm, quiet voice.

Ceres.

Mother...? Was that your name?

Ceres.

The name and the image of my mother's face fit together like puzzle pieces.

Ceres. Mother.

But that still doesn't explain how you died, mother... Ceres...

Alec! He told me what little I know of you... He must know more! Excited, I dry my eyes and race to his room.

"Yes?" he asks in response to my knocking.

"Alec... It's Tooya. Can we talk?"

"Sure," he says, opening the door and offering me a seat by his desk. "What is it?"

"I want you to tell me how Ceres died."

"Ceres?"

"My mother," I explain. "I remembered her name."

"I... I can't tell you," Alec stammers.

"You don't know?" A frown shows my hopeless disappointment.

"No. It's just... I don't want to say."

"Alec," I plead, "I want to know. I need to know. Or else..." I try to fight back the tears welling in my eyes. "I can't greive properly," I finish, the tears showing in the sound of my voice.

Alec walks over to me and rests his hand on my shoulder. "Tooya. I understand. But it will be difficult for me to tell you, and even more difficult for you to hear."

I inhale deeply, then utter, "I'm ready. Tell me."

"Your mother was... murdered."

I don't even try to fight the tears this time. "Who did it?!"

Alec begins to cry as well. "I... don't know. There were no witnesses, and the police weren't able to get any leads. I'm sorry."

"You couldn't have helped that," I mutter.

Alec sighs. "It's tragic. She was murdered right in this building, on your first day of college. The whole dormitory... no, the whole school, was in an uproar. To begin a year like that...

"That evening, I found you and said hello. I started talking about how great it was that we could stay best friends even into high school.... And then..." Alec starts to cry again. "You asked who I was. At first I thought you were joking, but then... I realized you didn't even know your own name. I think the trauma of your mother's death wiped your memory away. I explained to you who you were and what you were doing at college. Then I told the doctor about you, and he had you checked into the hospital."

"I remember that. I was so confused about my memory loss that I just signed myself in as soon as the doctor suggested it. I was in there for months before I came back to school, but when I came back, you were there to greet me. I remember how impressed I was that you remembered me because I thought we'd only met once."

"Yeah, I would've told you how long we'd been friends, but for the longest time, you didn't want to hear about your past." Alec paused, then added, "You're taking it very well."

"I don't know how." We both remain silent for a few moments, then I burst out laughing.

"What is it?"

"I didn't go home for the summer so I could make up credits. And I thought that was the only reason I didn't go home!"

Alec just stares at me blankly.

My laughter quiets and my smile fades. "You're right, that was pretty morbid. It's just ironic that I thought I had a home and mother to return to."

Then, all of a sudden, I visualize the murderer.