Beyblade Fan Fiction ❯ Guilt ❯ To feel what you feel ( Chapter 8 )

Chapter 8

 

She hadn't had a goodnight sleep. It hadn't been unusual this week because of the mysterious box, but this was different. But this time she had fallen in a sleep filled with visions of her past. Of her parents and that one night where she had heard them discussing. It made a lot more sense now that it did then. They were talking about her, about what they had found out. Had they known their end was going to be short by? Or had it been a discussion they had every night? This was followed by her hell in Biovolt. The evil grin that always seemed to be plastered on Boris' face, the nameless faces that kept disappearing because they failed to perform, that one gunshot in the next room. No, it had not been a pleasant night at all.

 

And it wasn't helped by her newest puzzle. The guardian Lyria had not ceased to talk since Faith had decided to stay awake and hope that caffeine would be able to keep her awake all night. Faith hoped it would stop talking once she was at work or she'd go insane. That was one of the things the bit beast nagged about the most. Of how, since she had acquired the blade, she should use that one instead of Myriad, and that then she would achieve greater things. And even though she ignored it and assured her feathered bit that she wouldn't do it, Lyria kept pressing, begging even to at least test the blade out. Hoping that it would work, Faith made a deal. If she promised to test it that the catlike bit would not talk for the rest of the day. Grudgingly the bit beast agreed.

 

Conditions didn't improve at work. Since it had been publicly announced that Belgium would retry for the world championships this year and that try-outs were next month, the gym was flooded with rookie bladers that thought they had what it took. Where she usually had only 5 or 10 people to guide, she now had 20, and she was sure more than half weren't even supposed to be in advanced beyblading. She kept going from one person to another giving advice at how they should pick up their speed or watch their defence and seeing no change at all if she came to check again 10 minutes later. She groaned and rubbed her temples.

 

Somebody called out her name. Looking up she saw the voice belonged to one of her most promising students. If any of the ones she trained would make it to the Belgian team, it would be him.

“I'm just wondering miss, you give us so much advice, yet you never blade us yourself. How do we know you're not just selling hot air?”

“What are you suggesting there Matthew?”

“A beybattle, you against me miss. Don't worry; I'll go easy on you.”

If Matthew had known Faith better he wouldn't have noticed the dangerous glint in her eye. She never backed out of a challenge and certainly hated it when people thought she was weak. Taking out Myriad, Lyria protested again, but she quickly silenced the bit, saying she would test it after this match. Standing at the other edge of the dish she told Matthew one thing before starting.

“You should never go easy on anyone in beyblading Matthew. Definitely if you do not know the other persons strength.”

 

She usually followed that rule herself, but she made an exception this time. The boy was only a kid after all. She had no intention to crush the boy's hopes. But he was still pretty discouraged once the match was over.

“Maybe I shouldn't register for try-outs after all.”

“Don't be silly Matthew, you're strong and smart, I'm sure you'll get a spot in the team.”

“I can't beat you, what makes you think I'll be able to beat them?”

She sat down on her knees in front of the boy, and showed him her beyblade.

“I have Myriad, my bit beast. You're stronger that most beybladers your age now Matthew, even the ones with bit beasts, Plus, You see the way the top of my attack ring is worn? That's because I've had it since I was 8. That adds up to about 10 years of experience Matthew, and that is a lot of advantage. They have age categories if I'm not mistaken so I'm sure you'll be just fine in the try-outs.”

 

“But I lost…”

“Losing is part of the game, even the greatest teams lost once in their career. You have to promise me you'll register.”

“Will you help me then?”

“Of course I will, I'm your coach remember?”

 

Seeing the boy get a little more confident she got back on her feet. Once the training started again it seemed a lot more people started to take her advice more seriously. Maybe she should've shown her strength and skill earlier. By the end of today's training she had actually seen improvement. While everyone was packing up their things, one of the older students asked her if she would register too. Everybody stopped what they were doing and stared at her. When she said no they all protested and then, after sheer pressure she agreed.

 

Once the last of her students had left she took out Lyria. She had promised to test the thing after all. She had no idea what to expect of this bit. So the first launch was a fiasco. The blade was stronger that she was used to and soon lost control of it. After 4 more launches she was finally able to harness and control the power. And what power it was, it was at least twice as strong as Myriad. Using this bit beast in the try-outs or even the tournament would be close to cheating. Then again, if she ever faced Biovolt…. Total humiliation would be exactly what they needed. Smirking at the thought she left for her apartment. She fell peacefully asleep that night, dreaming of the amazed and crestfallen looks on Boris and Voltaire's face.

 

Two weeks later bladers from the entire country came to Bruges. Because of that, all trainings were cancelled so the contestants could train all day. It was needless to say that Faith could focus more on training Matthew and herself. While the boy was at school she was randomly fighting bladers, holding back and pretending to be easy prey. One of them proved more difficult to battle though. The strength of this girl matched her own and she was forced to call out Myriad in the hopes of gaining territory. Myriad and she hadn't had this much fun in a long time, she could feel the bit beast cooing contentedly inside its blade.

 

Once the battle was over, the girl came to congratulate Faith on the narrow win. Though her face had a very defined Asian look, she had red hair, which was very uncommon, as were her amber eyes.

“You have some power inside that blade of yours girl. When I saw you battling earlier I thought you were going to be a pushover, but boy was I mistaken. What's your name?”

“I'm Faith, and the same goes to you. It's been a while since I had this much trouble…?”

“Oh, I'm Malin, say, Faith would you care for a cup of tea? I've been dieing for one ever since I arrived.”

“You haven't been here long then?”

“Only a few hours.”

 

Faith didn't say much, but agreed on that cup of tea. She had heard the name Malin before, but she didn't like to remember where she had heard it from. Or who for that matter. She decided that maybe this girl would go away before anything she said opened old wounds. But the problem was, Malin talked so much that Faith didn't even know if old wounds were opened or not.

“So I arrive here and I see this big sign saying Belgian try-outs, you know. And I thought, why the hell not, I mean, you guys haven't been in the big league in years. And then I end up here and find out why. Your country blows at beyblading, did you know that? By the way, why do you have such a weird accent? You don't sound like any of the Belgians I met....blablablabla.”

Maybe that cup of tea was a bad idea after all. She could feel another headache coming on and this one wasn't from lack of sleep. Seeing her chance as Malin took a breath Faith interrupted, “Malin, could you please zip it or do you want me to do it?” Though looking very peeved, Malin made move to talk. “Yes, my country isn't good at beyblading, but they only just started again. My weird accent comes from living in another country for a long time.”

After a few moments of silence Faith decided to ask a few questions of her own, knowing that the subject would come up sooner or later.

 

“Have you ever been in America by any chance?”

Malin looked baffled for a moment and then answered hesitantly.

“Yes, I was part of the All Stars a few years back as well. How did you know?”

“Well, you certainly talk enough to be American, and a guy named Michael mentioned you once.”

“Number one girl, I'm NOT American ok? Yes, I've lived there for a long time of my life but I'm still Asian to the bone. Number two, how do you know Michael?”

“I met him while I was in Paris, and before you ask anything, I don't wish to talk about it.”

“Treated you like shit too huh?”

Faith quirked an eyebrow at the girl. The look on her face radiated sadness at the apparently unhappy memory of the blockheaded blader. But a smile was soon seen on Malin's face again. Before Faith could stop it, Malin started another waterfall of questions. She sighed; she finally had gotten the bit beast in her head to stop this. How fate could be cruel at times. Most of the questions were about hotels and restaurants this time and she found out that Malin had had no luck at finding a place to stay or eat for that matter.

 

“Look, if you promise to talk not as much as now, you can stay at my place. It's only a simple bed, and the food isn't haute cuisine, but you won't have to sell your soul to pay for it.”

“Ok, thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me. I'll do the dishes I promise, and the laundry, and…”

She saw the look on Faith's face.

“Eum. Thanks.”

The rest of those two weeks continued quite nicely. Thankfully for Faith, Malin was very quiet and very serious when it came to training. But sometimes she wished the girl was like that before and after training too. The first week was the worst. Every time the Asian girl found something interesting in the apartment, she wouldn't stop asking questions, even up to the point where Faith wanted nothing more than to throttle the girl, only to get some peace and quiet. But after that the constant babbling started to grow on her. She was starting on the dinner when Malin released another row.

 

“I never knew you met the White Tigers?”

“As I told you before, I travelled a lot, so yeah, I lived there a few years.”

“Why isn't Ray on this picture?”

“Who?”

“Ray. Tall, dark and handsome, long black ponytail…you know, Ray”

“I'm sorry, but I never heard of him. Wait, oh right, Mariah mentioned him once, it seemed he left a few months before I arrived, they all thought it was a real disgrace. So that would explain why Ray isn't on there.”

`Oh', was the only reply Faith got, and it made her curious enough to step out of the kitchen to see what was wrong. She knew exactly what was going on in Malin's head by just looking at that face. She had seen it in the mirror so many times.

“You miss him, am I right?”

“Huh? What makes you think that? I was just wondering how he was doing, that's all.”

“Keep telling yourself that, maybe one day you'll believe it yourself.”

“What makes you the expert?”

Faith gestured at the wall.

“Most of these pictures are the only memories I have of people I have loved, people that I can never see again. I know what it feels like to miss someone so badly that you wish you could tear your heart out if it would stop the pain.”

 

She then blinked a few times. Why had she just said that? Of course, to prove her right, but she hadn't meant to say that much. Without another look she went back to the dinner. Maybe that would take her mind of it. She nearly chopped of her finger when Malin spoke right behind her.

“It's hard to admit it, isn't it? To admit that someone can affect you in such a way. How long have you been alone?”

Putting down the knife she turned and looked at the redhead. There was no more cheerfulness upon her face, only pure seriousness. Faith could feel that this girl could understand some things. Or maybe she was just kidding herself.

“What do you mean by alone?”

“Alone as in surrounded by people, but by nobody who can feel what you feel. Who knows what you are going to do before you even do it.”

“A long time.”

 

Not wanting to talk about it anymore Faith focussed back on cutting up the vegetables. It seemed it was not necessary for her to talk. As usual, Malin did most of the talking.

“Me too, though in my case it was my own fault. I ran away from home, thinking I would be better of in a place where there were no rules, no traditions, and no limitations. I was so stupid, so ignorant, walking straight into the thing that was entirely the opposite from what I wanted. And I didn't even see it at first, and when I did it was much too late. I couldn't go back, if Ray is in disgrace, I'm certainly not better off. I keep thinking, if only I had just stayed put for a little longer, then maybe it wouldn't have all seemed so bad. Then I wouldn't have been so alone.”

“My father told me once to never look back unless you were going that way. To be proud of what you accomplished and not to feel bad about the things that failed.”

“Sounds like your father is a wise man.”

“Yeah he was, even though the sayings weren't his own.”

She looked at the amount of work she still had for dinner, gave it up as a bad job and ordered some Chinese. Upon the look Malin was giving her, she only responded that she just happened to like Chinese food and that that was the only thing she needed to think of it.

 

It was strange, she had never been able to talk about things so seriously and then switch back to more casual things like that. And it didn't feel like they hadn't listened to each other either. They talked about other things during food and they came to the agreement that maybe neither of them was alone anymore. The only thing they could hope is that this understanding would survive through the try-outs.

 

Now it was one day before the start of the try-outs and she could see Matthew shaking with stress. Deciding it would be better to not pressure the boy now, she ended the training. She put a hand on his shoulder and smiled assuringly.

“Go home Matthew, get some rest, have a long night sleep; you'll need it if you want to be prepared tomorrow.”

“I don't think I can sleep.”

“Drink some warm milk then, or chocolate milk, just make sure you get some sleep. You can't get a spot on the team if you're not well rested enough now can you?”

“Will you come and see my match tomorrow?”

“I promise.”

 

Seeing the grateful look on the boys face she was strongly reminded of the way her brother once looked when she promised to teach him how to beyblade. Even though the memory of her brother hurt, she couldn't help but smile. So this is what her brother might have been like if they had been happy.

 

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