Bleach Fan Fiction ❯ His Azure Eyes ❯ Chapter Two ( Chapter 2 )

Chapter One: Ikkaku/Yumichika

 

Despite what his colleague's seemed to think Yumichika did not enjoy filing, paperwork, documenting or research.

 

The whole task of anything related to administration was nothing but a bore in his eyes; something contrived to make his life feel longer and his training sessions shorter. It was a task that was not only a waste of time but completely pointless to all involved. Squad Eleven was a fighting squad, the first line of the Seireitei's defence and the first to attack any hostile intruders, they trained their bodies to the very peak of perfection and worked on becoming the strongest in existence. Surely such a squad had no need for paperwork? What could one possibly say of any interest or meaning when the whole squad did nothing but train, fight and train some more? It wasn't like the were in Squad Ten and in charge of said administration, or in a wimpy place like Squad Four where exact measurements were needed for medicines or careful records needed to be kept of patients. So what good was it in having their prized fighters letting their bodies go to waste, solely to write out papers that would likely never be read?

 

He'd much rather be like Yachiru who had no real worries other than snacking, or like Ikkaku who either napped or fought for pleasure in constant training, or even like Captain who lived for fights and drinking. His only consolation of course was that if he snacked like Yachiru he'd gain weight, if he fought like Ikkaku he'd be scarred all over and if he drank like the Captain he'd suffer the indignity of hangovers. In fact when he thought of it that way it was almost a relief to be doing the paperwork!

 

He gave a bright beaming smile at the thought and hugged the folders tightly to his chest, a light little chuckle escaping his fine lips as he did so, relishing in the fact that the more time he spent in the murky depths of admin the less he had to worry about damaging his looks. He'd still need to exercise for an hour later of course to maintain his figure, and he'd obviously need to visit the baths to clean himself of any dust, but overall it was a lot better than having his body scratched and bruised or his clothes dirtied by new recruits.

 

It was just a shame the offices down here were so dank and dirty. He'd have to have Captain send in a request to Squad Four for one of their men to clean it up, that or they could save it for `punishment' or `hazing' for the unseated officers. Come to think of it Squad Four seemed to clean up after them a lot, surely that squad wasn't large enough to clean the offices, barracks and training areas of all the Gotei Thirteen? Hmm, he'd have to ask Renji and Matsumoto at some point who cleaned up after their squads.

 

Yumichika carefully placed one of his files on the top of his pile onto the shelf, then made his way over into Section F, Subsection B; it had always surprised him just how large these offices were, perhaps the previous captain was more into paperwork than the current captain? No, no, that couldn't be right, the shelves were all nearly empty after all and it seemed such a waste of space, perhaps they could convert this area into something more useful and use one of the store rooms for documents, he'd be sure to look into the matter and see. He had to stop by Squad Ten in an hour anyway to deliver copies of the reports, he'd ask about planning permission there.

 

Somehow it never occurred to him that for someone who hated academic and administrative tasks he always seemed to be so good at it, he was always the one who volunteered for the jobs as they arose, and always the one who got things done as far as his squad was concerned. He was the backbone of Squad Eleven, the glue that held everything together whether he or his comrades realised it or not, without him the whole squad would probably collapse into chaos within seconds. Yet even if he knew that he wouldn't have appreciated his current work environment any more, the place looked like it belonged in the inner circles of hell . . .

 

The whole administration room was located in a basement room underneath one of the squad's barracks, the room was thus perpetually dark and dreary, and occasionally dust tended to fall on you when someone stamped to hard on the floor above. He was pretty certain the unseated officers' common room was above him, and because it was often used for fighting and training you often became prone to showers of dust, and so that was why he was always careful to plan his visits to the admin room when he knew everyone else was busy or training elsewhere. Today however he'd been so desperate to avoid Ikkaku that he'd came immediately down into the admin and began work, he was lucky to avoid the dust clouds and crumbling plaster that fell from the ceiling, but he was still stuck in a mouldy labyrinth of bookcases and piles of folders, hardly a dignified setting for someone like himself. Everything so enclosed, so claustrophobic so dull and boring. In fact the only visitor he'd had all day was Yachiru who insisted on `playing' and asking him about `Baldy', it said quite a lot about how lonely it was when he missed his lieutenant . . .

 

He gave a long sigh and placed his pile of documents on the empty shelf in front of him. Perhaps it was time for a well-deserved lunch-break? He'd been working all morning and afternoon, only stopping for half-an-hour for his o-bento box, and now it had to be at least four o'clock, perhaps even later. One of the fellow seated officers had came down only an hour ago to say that Captain was finished napping, asking if he wished to join the squad - minus Yachiru - for a well needed drinking session with Squad Eight, and he'd denied them. It was an odd request too, drinking sessions usually happened quite late in the evening, how long had he been working? It really was time to get out of there. His work would still be there tomorrow . . . no one else would so much as touch it, let alone do it. Bastards.

 

He turned to leave and headed out from in between the two ceiling-high bookcases into the main aisle. The moment he stepped foot into the aisle however he turned his head and caught sight of Ikkaku, the taller man standing absently at the far end of the room with his back to Yumichika, looking around as if looking for someone.

 

Yumichika felt his whole body tense and slowly turned around, hoping to duck back into one of the rows of bookcases before he was spotted, he'd barely took one step however before he heard someone shouting his name.

 

“Yo, Yumi!”

 

Mentally kicking himself he reigned in his frown and turned around to face Ikkaku with a bright - if forced - smile upon his features. He brushed back his hair with an elegant, yet flirtatious, flick of his hand and tilted his head to one side to look upon his lover with an idle curiosity. Ikkaku was already bounding down the aisle most ungracefully, his Zanpakuto balancing on his shoulder as he stared almost lecherously at Yumichika.

 

“You're not still sulking down here, are you? Captain says to get your ass up into Squad Eleven barracks immediately, says your going to have a drink whether you want one or not,” Ikkaku nodded to the door and smirked, “We had a bet going if you were still down here. Captain said there was no way there was enough work to last you a whole day, and Lieutenant Kusajishi took the bet by saying you probably left after `Maki-Maki' came to fetch you, but I'm the only one who thought you'd still be down here. Looks like I win! Lucky!”

 

“Congratulations, Ikkaku.” Said Yumichika curtly.

 

He glanced across the room to a clock high above the door to the exit. It seemed it was now nearly six in the evening, meaning that Kyoraku-Taichou had escaped work early with plans to see Ukitake-Taichou in the evening, and that Zaraki-Taichou was too exhausted to hang around any longer and craved a hot bath and bed. Any other squad would have been in serious trouble for having an early day to take part in a drinking session, how his own squad and Kyoraku-Taichou's got away with it, he wasn't sure. He shook his head and headed straight back to his paperwork, maybe if he acted busy then Ikkaku would take no for an answer and leave him alone. He could hope anyway.

 

“What's your problem, Yumi?” Ikkaku snapped, lifting his Zanpakuto high off his shoulder to point it directly at Yumichika as he began to work again, “You've been pissed at me ever since I was making fun of those geeks in Squad Four this morning, is it my fault that they and Squad Five are full of wimpy kido-types? Any one would think you'd felt sorry for them.”

 

Yumichika bristled at once and slammed his folders hard onto the bookcase.

 

He made such a racket that Ikkaku looked strangely at him with interest and mild annoyance, but it was when Yumichika turned to face him with a look of sheer fury that it hit him just how pissed his lover was. In response he merely blinked back in shock and sheathed his Zanpakuto. Sure he was willing to take on nearly anyone in a fight but he wasn't foolish enough to start a fight with his boyfriend for no reason, especially in the filing room where one stray attack would have everything out of order and destroyed. So instead he leant lazily against a bookcase and gazed at his lover lazily.

 

Yumichika was standing there tall and graceful as ever, posture perfect and arms folded elegantly across his chest in a mock authoritative pose, even when he was furious he couldn't bring himself to stand in a `manly' way and kept his legs together and body lithe and posed.

 

He was obviously angry but his anger just made him look passionate, alive and raw, it made him seem almost ravishing and tempting so that Ikkaku just wanted to wipe that expression from his face, and God only knew that angry sex was the best kind of sex. When Yumichika stood so controlled and poised, so conceited and furious, it made Ikkaku instinctively want to grab him and put him in his place, show him who was boss, claim him and take him and prove to him just who was in charge. It made him want to feel that body clawing at his back and hissing in irritation before screaming, losing all that control he once had, and then to have him bask in the afterglow and admit how wrong he'd been. Sadly fights with Yumichika usually began with avoidance and ended with a long week of celibacy to which Ikkaku would - less than manly - beg Yumichika to forgive him.

 

“Come on, Yumi,” Ikkaku said with a powerful glare, “If anyone has any right to be angry then it's me. I'm the one who should be pissed here, not you.”

 

“Oh? And why is that?”

 

The glare he shot Ikkaku was far from cold, in fact it was so full of emotion it made the taller man reel back in shock. Those purple eyes seemed to shimmer with a layer of water, threatening to set forth a wave of tears that should never be shed in their infamous squad, and the way they narrowed and clenched was both beautiful and heartbreaking. He could see the red tinge to his lover's cheeks, one which the other would no doubt hate for clashing with his orange accessories, but one that made him seem so much more human and warm. His fingers were also clenching hard upon his black kosode, and his lips were taut into a tight line made them seem ready to break open into a scream at any second.

 

Ikkaku wasn't sure he should answer at first, scared of upsetting his lover even more, but he was hurt too. He was hurt by the things Yumichika said, by the things Yumichika did, he was hurt that no matter how much he opened up to his lover that his lover still hid things from him, like now - even though he was obviously upset - he still couldn't tell Ikkaku what was bothering him. He was also hurt by - oddly as it sounded - his lover's beauty, because every single damn day his lover obsessed with his looks and appearance, constantly in love with himself but also picking flaws. He'd complain about his eyelashes and enhance them with feathers, complain about his chest and so hide it with a neckpiece, and it seemed that there wasn't anything about him couldn't be improved. It made Ikkaku feel ugly and pathetic, and how else was he meant to feel? Yumichika was a god and if someone as perfect as him felt ugly and weak, then what must he see in Ikkaku with his lack of hair or overly muscled body? What could he possibly see in Ikkaku when every time he looked at himself he only see flaws, flaws on a perfect being!

 

It was hard not to risk his lover's wrath by going closer to him, but Ikkaku felt both hurt and rejected, all throughout the day Yumichika had hidden away and worried about himself, allowing himself to feel angry, and not once had he sought out Ikkaku to ask him how he felt. That was always the way! Yumi loved him, if he had so much as a scratch he'd be right by his side, and when they'd been severely injured during the Ryoka attack Yumi had even insisted on sharing a room in Squad Four, and when he'd been hurt during the Arrancar attack he'd heard Kira had had to knock him out because he'd hysterically tried to help him. Kira of all people! It was almost laughable. Yumi had been by his side in Rukongai, joined alongside him in Gotei Thirteen, and supported him ever since and yet - . . . and yet Yumi still hid things from him, make him feel so damned ugly, and could never reveal his emotional state. It made Ikkaku wonder where the trust was, if it was even there, because how could you spend your life with someone and still keep secrets? Hadn't he told Yumi about his own bankai, about his own secrets, why couldn't he do the same back?

 

He walked down between the aisle of bookcases to the far end where Yumichika stood, shaking slightly in fear for how long the silence had progressed, and then stood a few feet away from him to give him some space.

 

“There's a few things pissing me off, Yumi,” He said calmly.

 

“Like what?”

 

He caught a look of complete fear in Yumichika's features, one that was so brief it was like a flash of lightning, something obvious but so sudden it may as well have existed only in the mind's eye, and yet so powerful you couldn't doubt its existence.

 

Ikkaku wondered what caused that fear, it wasn't as if he feared bodily harm as he knew Ikkaku would never harm him, and even if he did Yumichika could put up one hell of a fight, so all that left was the fear of emotional pain. That was a question in itself, what the hell kind of emotional hurt could he be scared of? There was something his lover wasn't telling him, something he wasn't saying, and it hurt him and it hurt him a lot. It was like a sharp stab into his abdomen followed with a feeling of an adrenaline rush and a fast beating of his heart, he felt like he wanted to scream and hurt someone for a wound that wasn't there, and when he thought about it he realised that pain was one of betrayal. He felt betrayed. He'd told Yumi everything and Yumi couldn't do the same back, he couldn't trust Ikkaku for whatever reason, and the realisation that whatever he said wouldn't make any difference was so frustrating! He wanted to yell `trust me' but what good would that do? None.

 

“Well like for one how you always bitch about your looks and obsess over them.”

 

He scratched his neck and stared off into space for a moment, he wasn't sure if he was starting off with the small things in order to work his way up, or if he was just avoiding the real issue at hand altogether. All he knew was that he was hurt and he wanted answers, but he was also scared of the answers themselves, all he'd ever known in life was the thrill of a fight but before all of that - before he signed up with Zaraki's squad, trained Renji, or even picked up a kendo sword - there was Yumichika. He was terrified of losing that, and the fear itself was a terrifying thing, for he was a fighter and a warrior who would confront death on a regular basis and spit in its face, to feel actual fear was an awful sensation, one hard to cope with.

 

When he looked back to Yumichika though he could see the other was now pouting, and his eyes had narrowed into a dangerous glare. He should have known that talking about appearances with his lover was dangerous territory, but it was still a lot easy than asking `hey, why the hell are you being so secretive with me?' Yeah, that question would probably earn him a kick to the balls, an arrogant look of contempt and a fortnight with only his hand for company at night. Not what he wanted at all.

 

“Pardon you?” Yumichika exclaimed in a voice somewhere between high and low, his how face now narrowed along with his eyes and his lips pouting as he raised his head so that he was looking down figuratively upon Ikkaku, “What is wrong with my looks?”

 

“What? Nothing! That's not what I meant!”

 

“Oh, then what did you mean?”

 

Ikkaku rolled his eyes and shrugged. This wasn't going right at all, he was going to have to pick his words very carefully if he wanted to salvage himself from this mess he'd made. It was hard though when his lover had clearly put up that mental wall and was acting through a cold façade, ready to attack at the first provocation and block out anything remotely offensive to his sensibilities. Ikkaku was used to it however but it still didn't mean he found it easy to deal with.

 

“What I mean is,” He said calmly, “Is that you always try and make yourself look better when you already look pretty damn hot, it's just a knock on my confidence to see my boyfriend all `I look so awful today!' when you look perfect, it makes me wonder how badly I have to look. It's obvious I'm not exactly as gifted as you as far as appearances go, so if you think you look bad then . . .”

 

Yumichika froze at that in such a way it made Ikkaku wonder if he'd stepped out of line somehow, but then a flash of pain and regret came over his lover's features and softened out any anger they once held. Instead his eyes now held a look of compassion and understanding, of love and empathy, and when he looked at Ikkaku it was nothing but adoration and a need for redemption. He gave such a sad smile that Ikkaku wanted nothing more than to kiss him hard, to make the pain go away, and he felt a kind of regret for even mentioning something that could cause his mate such pain. It surprised him in fact how much his words did affect Yumi, and it just reminded him of how strong their relationship really was.

 

When that sad smile faded away Yumi raised his hand to cup Ikkaku's face, his long fingers tracing a light path down his prominent jawbone only to rest on his full and thick lips. Then with a gentle gesture he leant forward and placed a soft peck on his lover's mouth, a gentle and chaste gesture but one full of meaning and love, one full of everything they'd came to feel for one another.

 

“Ikkaku, you're beautiful, not just to me but to everyone,” He said, moving his body closer so that they were within inches of one another, “You may have a slight complex with your shortness of hair -” He carefully avoided the term `being bald' so as not to cause offence, “- but even Yachiru thinks it suits you, and in many cultures it's considered a sign of fertility.”

 

Ikkaku scoffed at that, “Good load of good that will do us.”

 

His lover frowned at that and pulled his hand away to rest on his own mouth, biting on the knuckle of his index finger nervously, his other arm wrapping around his stomach, the gesture both defensive and of anger.

 

“You don't want children one day?”

 

“What the -? You're as bad as Renji! Makes me wonder how the pair of you ever graduated,” He laughed even though Yumichika pouted, probably confused seeing as he apparently lacked an understanding of basic biology - that or Ikkaku was seriously missing something, “Look, it's not about how I look, it's about what you think of me. When you go around acting like you do it makes me feel ugly, and I have to wonder what the hell you see in someone as ugly as me when you're so pretty?”

 

Yumichika froze on hearing that. He felt devastated that he'd inspired such feelings in his lover, the very thought he'd caused someone else to feel ugly was in itself a very ugly thing, in fact the only `ugly' person he knew was that ridiculous Ryoka he'd been forced to battle long ago. Ikkaku was a beautiful man - barring the fact he just called Yumichika `pretty' and not `handsome' - and he was interesting, intelligent, powerful and kind-hearted, he was good with his hands too and very loving, even building Yachiru a scooter for her birthday. He was perhaps the most beautiful person Yumichika knew, and to make somebody else feel that they were ugly was appalling! He couldn't imagine ever himself feeling like that, and so to make someone else feel that way, especially someone he loved . . .

 

“Ikkaku, I don't want you to feel that way,” He said honestly and calmly, “You have no reason to. I only worry so much about my looks because I'm worried what will happen if I lose them, they're all I have and if I lose that then I lose you, Ikkaku. I also want to look handsome for you, is that so much of a crime? If it hurts you however I'll try to tone it down, but habits are hard to break and I can't guarantee I can stop it all at once.”

 

Ikkaku took one look at Yumichika and smiled.

 

The poor guy was still gnawing at his finger and looking down at the floor with an expression of fear, and his face had paled considerably. He was truly scared of losing Ikkaku. He'd also admitted that everything he'd done he'd done for his lover, and so for Ikkaku to have misinterpreted his vanity as a selfish thing made him cringe inside, especially as it was all for his benefit. He knew that he'd have to work hard on showing his lover just how perfect he was from now on, even if he lost his looks he'd still be perfect with strength, smarts and loyalty to his squad. If the poor guy was that insecure and fragile it'd take a long time to build up his confidence, but Ikkaku was willing to stick at it, make him realise just how special he was.

 

He reached across and took a hold of his lover's chin, turning him to face him so he could place his lips warmly on Yumichika's, and then with a heartfelt gesture kissed him with all the love he felt inside him. Like always Yumi's lips were soft, warm and moist, perfect and inviting as they parted softly with a gasp and allowed him entry, letting him slip his tongue inside and taste that exotic taste that was uniquely Yumi's, feeling his hot mouth against his. He loved the way Yumi's tongue would submissively give way to his, allowing him to dominate the kiss, and he loved the way Yumi would arch his back and stand on tiptoes to reach up for more. It was perfect. It would always be perfect, and so when he pulled away he smiled and pecked his lover lightly on the nose.

 

“You fool, you're always beautiful to me.”

 

“Oh?” Yumichika snapped, “When that ridiculous Ryoka ruined my hair you laughed at me!” He glared when Ikkaku stifled a manly giggle, “And I don't believe you. I won't believe you until you tell me what the other thing is that's pissing you off, it can't be beautiful if it makes you angry and if it is me making you angry then surely I cannot be beautiful either! Thus you lie!”

 

Ikkaku leant his head against Yumi's and sighed, his breath mingling with his partner's as they stood silently in the gloom of the admin basement room of Squad Eleven.

 

It wasn't that he was lying at all, he loved Yumi and he wanted to be with him, but at the same time he was forced to wonder if the other man trusted him or even loved him. To love someone was to trust them, to trust them was to open yourself up completely to them and believe everything would be okay, and to open yourself was to allow them access to your body, mind and heart and not fear harm coming to you at all. So far Yumi had entrusted Ikkaku with his body and mind, but his heart - that fragile muscle home to a store of emotions - was closed off to him and kept sealed away behind a wall of indifference and fear. Was he so wrong for wondering how someone could possibly love him who couldn't even bring themselves to trust him?

 

He pulled back his head and looked Yumi deeply in his eyes. They were such a beautiful purple, kind of wisteria like the name of his Zanpakuto or the hilt of his sword, but at they always reflected the inner depths of his soul. He only had to look at those eyes to see if his lover was angry, sad, happy or lustful - anger was always the easiest emotion to decipher, such as the time his hair was blown into an afro style or when he was forced to make a cake for a spirit, and lust was always a pretty easy one to figure out too, but sadness however . . .

 

Even now he felt like his partner was hiding something from him, keeping a part of himself hidden away under lock and key, because any damn time he saw those eyes glimmer in sorrow it would always be accompanied with an expression of fear too. Yumichika could rarely - if ever - feel regret on its own for a past mistake, or depression over the loss of a colleague, or general lethargy after a tough week, whenever that slither of sadness shone through it'd be always, always with a look of terror. He could partly understand it, he knew Renji often battled with depressive thoughts usually regarding self-worth, and whenever Renji was down he'd feel a spark of terror too, wondering who'd leave him next or if his captain hated him for not being as strong. Kira had that same fear, and so did many other Shinigami and humans too, after all everyone was afraid of something and those fears tended to bring about sadness. However those people also allowed themselves to simply feel, allowed themselves to be sad without any other emotion in the way, but Yumichika couldn't and wouldn't, always - even now - they'd be that fear. Why?

 

“I'm not lying, Yumi,” He said, rolling his eyes, “I admit it, I'm pissed off at you, but only because I know you're hiding something. It's like you don't trust me! I want to know what your big secret is, and if you don't tell me -.”

 

“If I don't tell you, then what?”

 

Ikkaku shrugged.

 

He knew full well how he wanted to end that sentence, because frankly he knew no matter how much he loved and adored this man he couldn't be with someone so secretive, he couldn't keep on guessing what he was feeling or what he wanted, merely hoping things were going well. He'd always be friends with Yumi, always love him, but romantically it would have to be over.

 

It hurt him too much to wake up each day and not know what was going on in his lover's mind, it made him so angry to see that face and not be able to trust whether Yumi trusted him or not, it drove him to the brink of insanity always worrying, always thinking, always fearing what was in that heart that belonged to his lover. The questions he felt and wondered, like whether Yumi could trust him or whether his secret was so big it would him them, they went around and around in his head until he couldn't think anymore, and it wasn't a way to live. He needed certainties and trust, he needed more than what they currently had.

 

“I don't know, Yumichika,” Ikkaku admitted, “I love you but I can't keep living like this. Every time I fight I fight to the death knowing I could die, and I see the fear in your eyes and know that you love me; it's what gives me the courage to keep fighting and what gives me the resolve to win. It hurts me to hurt you and so I try to avoid opponents where death is a certainty. That's what confuses me, the fact I know you love me and yet you can lie to me day in, day out, and I know I'm lucky to have you! Lucky, lucky, lucky! Yet how can someone who loves me not be able to trust me? What is it your hiding, Yumi, that you think you can't trust me with?”

 

Yumichika swallowed hard at this and raised his hand to cover his mouth. The movement was graceful, but there was a slight shake to his fingers that made it obvious how nervous he truly was. He looked at Ikkaku with a paled face, narrowed eyes and an expression of complete and utter fear, the face in itself made Ikkaku jerk back in surprise and blink in shock. Suddenly he was terrified, wishing he could take back the question, because whatever it was to bring about such a reaction in Yumichika had to be bad, and if it was so bad as this he wasn't sure if he wanted to know what it was . . .

 

All Yumichika felt however was absolute terror. It was like being caught in a catch twenty-two, like being given an ultimatum where he was damned it he did and damned if he didn't. He knew deep inside that if he kept things secret he'd be risking his relationship with his lover, maybe even destroying the one good thing in his life by his own act of mistrust, and the thought of that broke something deep inside him and made him wince at his own weakness. He also knew that if he told Ikkaku the truth, told him exactly what he'd been hiding, then the man would hate him, loathe him, look at him with a whole new expression and his eyes would convey the disgust he so often looked at others with. He'd also lose his place on the Zaraki Squad and lose the respect of his esteemed colleagues; in short he'd lose it all. He wasn't sure whether to keep quiet and eventually lose Ikkaku over time, or to speak up and damn himself to his lover's hate. It didn't seem to matter what he did he would lose his lover regardless! He was going to lose Ikkaku!

 

Oh God, the very thought of losing the man he so loved and adored killed him inside.

 

There was an actual physical pain that came with the thought of losing his loved one, and it was a pain that always came when he thought of being abandoned, and one he didn't just feel for Ikkaku but for Zaraki-Taichou too. He loved those around him so much that his heart literally beat for them, the very thought of losing them for whatever reason was scarring. It made his stomach churn like butter until he could feel himself bending over, and made his throat clench and tighten like he was stuck between choking and gagging, and his eyes would feel so heavy and inflamed it was like needing to cry when no tears would come out.

 

It was a fear he'd always had and always felt, and being in the Rukongai he'd had his fair share of people leaving him for various reasons, in fact it was hard not to believe he was the source and cause for his previous loneliness. Out of all the people who'd ever left him they'd been only one common factor in all their relationships: him. He could only believe that there was something so fundamentally wrong with him that it pushed people away, caused them to hate him, and by God he'd tried everything over the years to change that! He'd cut his hair, added eyelash extensions, changed his dress sense into one more masculine, in fact he'd even changed his personality somewhat and doted more upon Ikkaku, but remembering to assert himself in a way he'd never previously done. It didn't seem to matter what he did though or how he acted, people still left him, they were doing it now, and even Ikkaku seemed to be implying that he'd leave! It just wasn't fair!

 

Would he ever be pretty enough, strong enough, intelligent enough to stop this from happening again, would he always be stuck alone without friends or company? Squad Eleven was all he had, Ikkaku was all he ever had - now and even back then - so the very thought of losing them was devastating, hurting him in a way in which he'd hoped never to be hurt again. If he lost Ikkaku, Zaraki-Taichou, Lieutenant Kusajishi, then he'd be all alone once more, he'd have to experience that overwhelming heartache each night that came with solitude, of knowing no matter how much you cried or screamed no one would hear you, hold you, comfort you. He never wanted to feel that way again, never!

 

“Yumi - Yumichika?” Ikkaku asked softly.

 

He shook his head in response, his wisteria-coloured hair shaking out of place and falling to frame his now reddened cheeks and flushed lips. His eyes shimmered with a film of water as he wondered just how to fix this, how to make it better, how to stop the one person he loved more than anything in the world from leaving him. The very thought of Ikkaku could make him smile, make his heart stop with joy, and to know that feeling of adoration, love and hope could be brutally ripped from him any second, to leave him with nothing but a hole inside his heart of emptiness and loneliness, it was more than he could bear, more than he could endure.

 

“Yumichika?” Ikkaku asked again with worry, “What's wrong? What're you hiding?”

 

“It's my Zanpakuto.” He said. His voice was so lifeless it was like his very soul had been sucked from him, leaving him an empty shell of a man and a broken corpse, “It's my Zanpakuto, Ikkaku.”

 

Ikkaku blinked hard a few times at this and scratched his neck.

 

He was starting to understand how Renji felt in almost all serious conversations, he was completely lost and didn't understand in the slightest, it was like being stuck in the world of the living with a map written in German. He loved Yumichika and was willing to hear him out on any matter, in fact he'd totally expected the worst when he'd saw his lover's reaction, but to then hear mentioned his Zanpakuto was just completely baffling. His lover's Zanpakuto was no secret and served him well in many fights, it was never a source of contention between them because it was just a weapon, so why would it be? If anything his statement seemed random, totally out of place, like asking what the time was and somebody answering London. Still, he was going to keep an open mind, after all he was the one who asked the question.

 

“Your . . . Zanpakuto?” Ikkaku asked, “What the hell about it? I asked what you're keeping secret and your answer's your Zanpakuto?”

 

Yumichika raised his hand to his mouth once more and bit at his thumbnail, his head cast to one side to stare into a dusty corner filled with cobwebs, his body now leaning fully against the bookcase behind him: “Yes. His name isn't Fuji Kujaku, it's Ruri'iro Kujaku, and he's a kido-type.”

 

All Ikkaku could do was stare in shock. “What?”

 

“You heard me right, Ikkaku Madarame,” Yumichika said with a tone of anger, unable to look his lover in the face, “Ruri'iro hates the colour of wisteria and so I call him Fuji to irritate him so he doesn't release his full power, it's mostly so that he appears to be a melee-type I wish he would be . . . partly it's because I fail to see how azure is a prettier colour than wisteria. My eyes are wisteria after all and they are by far my greatest feature! If he wishes to undermine my beauty I have a right to undermine his.” Yumichika flicked his hair at this and resumed his usual look of contempt, which made Ikkaku snort with amusement, “Why, I resent the fact he makes my eyes azure with each Shikai!”

 

Ikkaku stood silent for a long moment, he couldn't help it, he wasn't sure whether he should be laughing at Yumichika for worrying about his appearance during an important confession (and moments after promising not to), or scream at him for even keeping something like this secret for so long! He wasn't sure how to be feeling at that moment in time either, the confession in itself was a pretty big one, but at the same time he felt so relieved that Yumichika wasn't dying or cheating on him or something. It was like a whirlwind of emotions inside of him and each one was more poignant than the last, begging for his attention, and he wasn't even sure how to react or what to say, despite the silence probably being torture for Yumi.

 

Firstly, he wasn't happy at all that Yumi's Shikai was a kido-type. Those who carried that sort of Zanpakuto were the ones he mocked and bullied, and those were the ones that Squad Eleven tended to hate and despise, which would mean if any of them found out Yumichika's life would be a nightmare! Even if there was no actual rule forbidding it the squad still demanded only melee-types, and poor Yumi would be an outcast, and if Ikkaku stayed with him then so would he! Of course Captain wouldn't stand for bullying, at least not against his Fifth Seat, and if Ikkaku stood by Yumichika's side then the Lieutenant and Captain would definitely support Yumichika. That didn't mean the looks would stop though, or the exclusion from group activities, brutal ignoring or the cruel rumours that would start, but at least he'd have some support if anyone found out, not that they would because Ikkaku was sure as hell not going to tell anyone.

 

Secondly, he found that - oddly enough - he didn't actually care too much about what type Yumi's Zanpakuto was. His main reason to be pissed came from the fact his boyfriend had kept a secret, not what that secret actually was. So what if Fuji - sorry - Ruri'iro Kujaku was a kido-type? It didn't stop Yumichika being as powerful as he was, hot as he was, or as loyal to his squad as he was, and even if it made him slightly more of a wimp then Ikkaku still loved him, he'd just have to be more protecting of the guy. The other thing was only wimps had kido-types and Yumichika was a strong man, so the likelihood was he was just mistaken, it wasn't as if he'd achieved Bankai or spoken directly to his Zanpakuto in a manifested state, so maybe he was just unsure of what type he really had, and assumed the worst? Damn it, that was just like Yumichika too, always jumping to the bad places, damned fool. No wonder he'd been so scared all this time, he'd been worrying about something that wasn't even true! Like he'd ever have a kido-type!

 

Ikkaku drew in a deep breath and smiled warmly at his lover, giving him a large grin before cupping his chin and forcing him to make eye-contact, when he did he beamed brightly and shrugged, rolling his shoulders right back in a manly way. When he spoke his words were clear, calm and loud, like he was trying to make a point to an opponent and not to his lover.

 

“You're an idiot, Yumi,” He said, then seeing Yumichika flinch he cut him off before he could start a shouting match, “I mean we've known each other since we were in the Rukongai district and been lovers for as long as I can remember us being together, the fact you could think I'd hate you for Zanpakuto hurts me. Sure, I hate those wimpy, half-assed losers for not fighting like men, but even if you have a weapon likes theirs it doesn't make you one of them. You're one of us, a member of Squad Eleven, and that's not going to change.”

 

“So - so you won't leave me? You won't tell anyone?”

 

“Tch, there's nothing to tell anyway. To be honest I don't believe you, I think you're mixed up about things, the day I believe my gorgeous Yumichika has a kido-type will be the day I see it with my own eyes! I won't hate you, even if it's true, but hell . . . it'll be freaking weird. You're not weak though, so until that day I'm going to believe you have a melee-type. You can't have anything else!”

 

“I believe that's called `denial',” Yumichika replied coldly.

 

Ikkaku shrugged again, “Eh, whatever. So we're all made up now?”

 

Yumichika merely looked away with an expression of irritation, it wasn't an angry or hurt look just merely a show of annoyance towards his partner. Obviously he actually believed that damned Zanpakuto was of a kido-type for whatever reason, and he probably wanted Ikkaku to take him seriously, but how could he? Yumichika was a strong warrior, a terrific fighter and a marvellous fifth-seat, there just wasn't any way that someone that strong could possibly have that type of Zanpakuto, and even if he did Ikkaku didn't want to believe it. He'd still love Yumichika of course, but his feelings wouldn't be the same, and how could they? It was easier just to ignore their whole argument as a misunderstanding and skip to the best part of things: making up.

 

He gently raised his hand and slid his fingers through Yumi's silky, smooth locks and felt the warmth of his cheek against his palm, relishing in the touch and sensation, enjoying the moment of pure connection between the two of them. His body came ever closer to his lover's, their chests almost touching, their breaths almost mingling, and then he carefully angled Yumichika's mouth to his so that he could reach out and take it, taste him, have him. His mouth was so close, his body so desperate, and yet something stopped him. The moment he was close enough to kiss Yumi something hard, large and painful came up and smacked him in the face, blocking his lips and blinding him for a brief moment.

 

Ikkaku took a step back and rubbed his aching nose and looked at Yumichika with an irritated growl, it seemed at the last second his irate boyfriend had grabbed a folder and decided to block Ikkaku's kiss, smacking him in the face in the process. He wouldn't have minded as such but surely their fight was over, and damn it that hurt too! What the hell was the point in attacking him like that?

 

“You really thought I'd forgive you so easily,” Yumichika said, shaking his head as he carefully filed away the document, “How easily brought do you think I am? My forgiveness cannot be brought by a kiss, Ikkaku.”

 

“What the -! You smack me in the face with a folder because you still don't forgive me? Jackass! I forgave you!”

 

“Yes, and out of all your muscles you train your brain was never one of them.”

 

“Are you calling me stupid now?”

 

Yumichika gave a rather alluring smile. His eyes became half-lidded and his eyelashes seemed to flutter in an almost come-hither way, his mouth parted just slightly as his hand came up to where Ikkaku's had previously been, flicking his wisteria locks back temptingly. There was a slight tinge of redness to his cheeks and his eyes seemed such a darker shade of purple that they were almost blue, almost azure even, just like he'd mentioned the effects of his Zanpakuto to be.

 

The way he turned slightly to his side and placed a hand on his hip gave him a rather feminine appearance, and yet he stood tall and powerful as if to prove he was still a man, a dangerous combination of both masculine and feminine, weak and strong, and by God it was the most erotic sight Ikkaku had seen. Yumichika had always known how to turn on his charm, how to gain people's attention and adoration, and he was fully aware of his beauty. He knew how to position his body to best catch the light, he knew how to pose in order to extract the emotions he wanted, and he knew how to batter his eyelids in order to appear as innocent as he wanted. All in all it was safe to say he was trying to tease Ikkaku, trying to lure him and trap him, arouse him into taking charge of the situation. In fact his little temper tantrum was probably just a lure to enrage Ikkaku, make him inflamed with passion and take him then and there.

 

“Yes Ikkaku, you are stupid.”

 

Yumichika said this as he sauntered between the bookcases to the far wall, his hips swinging as he walked and his eyes looked sexily over his shoulder to his lover. When he reached the wall he turned and leant against it, raising both of his hands to be on level with his head, his fingers half-closed and his head slightly to one side so as to expose his column of neck. One leg was pulled upwards so that his foot was beside his right knee, and if he were horizontal and not vertical he'd look like a virginal man about to be ravished for the first time, luring in his lover with sheer innocence, unknowing of the true impact he was capable of.

 

“You're stupid because you know I won't fully forgive you until you apologise, admitting that you're willing to accept me for who I am.”

 

At this he unclipped the sash connecting his sleeve to his neckpiece and dropped it to the floor, sliding off his sleeve as he did so, the movement so slow that it was almost like a strip-show as inch by inch pale, shiny, white skin came on show. It was just his naked wrist but to see that exposed flesh made Ikkaku lick his lips, knowing that slowly but surely his lover was exposing more of himself, knowing that no one dead or alive had seen Yumichika the way he was surely about to see him. He watched as Yumi smiled devilishly before pulling off his neckpiece. His hair became ruffled at this but the look only made Ikkaku want more, to see even the slightest imperfection on his lover just reminded him of how perfect Yumi was, reminding him how gorgeous his lover could look even with something out of place. To see those prominent collarbones too, to see that V-shape of hairless chest and how it expanded on each and every breath, it was just too alluring for him to take his eyes off.

 

“You also know,” Yumichika said with his devil-may-care grin, his left hand now back at its starting place beside his head as his right hand fingered at his obi sash, “That you never usually apologise unless basking in the afterglow of sex, which although immature I have no objection to. So if you wish for my forgiveness I suggest you do not kiss me, but instead take me.”

 

Ikkaku watched as he quickly untied his obi sash and threw it far out so that it reached the main aisle of admin room, but he couldn't follow its movements for long because soon after his eyes had become riveted upon Yumi. It seemed his lover wasted no time, instead immediately dropping his Zanpakuto to one side and letting his kosode slide off his body, dropping to the floor with a sharp thud, leaving his upper body completely exposed. He then allowed his hakama to drop to the floor, toeing off his sandals and tabi, leaving him completely exposed . . .

 

It was times like these Ikkaku realised just why he loved Yumichika so much. The guy was willing to do anything for his lover and understood him so perfectly well, knowing exactly how his mind worked and reacted to things, and the fact he was willing to make love in such public places turned Ikkaku on more than he liked to admit. Sure no one ever really came down into Squad Eleven's admin room, including Squad Eleven itself, but that didn't mean there wasn't a chance of getting caught, and if they did they'd be hell to pay. Captain had already ordered them up for a drinking session, regardless of what the order was it didn't pay to disobey it, and should someone get worried and send an unseated officer to check on them then they'd be caught in the act! Then again it was hard to say no when Yumichika stood there, pressed against the wall, without a single piece of clothing - Ikkaku was mentally kissing the feet of the gods that his lover had decided to go without underwear today, the whole sight was just perfect.

 

Yumichika's body was truly flawless.

 

His skin was pure white with a slight shine to it, not one blemish or mark anywhere upon him, and it was so fresh and supple that one had to wonder just how he maintained it, it was always baby-soft to the touch and smelled faintly of exotic perfumes. The way he arched his neck made that silky hair fall across his high cheekbones, casting him in half-shadow so that he seemed all the more vulnerable, and his muscled chest moved up and down with a panted rhythm of breath. He was far from being overly-muscular, more well-toned and defined, but he was also quite thin and lithe with an almost curve to his figure, so that anyone - regardless of gender - would be envious of his body and flat stomach.

 

His wisteria eyes were shining azure now, luring Ikkaku in with their half-lidded look, and reminding him that there was something hidden and mysterious about Yumi, something that he just couldn't believe was related to his Zanpakuto, and when he looked at those legs . . . Those long, supple, willowy legs seemed to call to him, begging to wrap around him and the very sight made him swallow hard. Just above those twinned columns stood Yumi's half-hard cock, already swelling and growing as it pointed in Ikkaku's direction, it was longer than most but thinner too, gaining in length what it lacked in width, and the very sight of it looked beyond perfect. It looked plain delicious, especially as it sat nestled in dark, purple curls that matched so well those on Yumichika's head.

 

Ikkaku didn't need any more incentive, immediately he began to strip himself of his own clothing, throwing items behind him so that the aisle was lined with his uniform, and he even laughed as his fundoshi caught on a book and hung down in a rather lewd way. He was now ready to take on the awesome task that was Yumichika, but before he could he looked to his lover and found himself completely awe-struck, and also riveted in place, his eyes glued to his lover.

 

Okay, so maybe he hadn't needed any more incentive than what he had but this - this! - was definitely worth watching, and definitely further inspiration to his task.

 

Yumichika was standing there, his eyes locked with Ikkaku's but his hands . . . his hands were down below. At some point as Ikkaku began to strip himself of his clothes Yumichika's own hands had begun to explore his body, tweaking at nipples until they were rosy red and as hard as his lover's cock, and then going even lower to explore intimate territory and prepare himself for Ikkaku's entrance.

 

His right hand was firmly yet gently wrapped around his now hard member, pumping slowly and rhythmically as his eyes remained connected with his lover's, and on each upward pull he'd swipe his index finger into that crying slit on the head, making himself moan out loud. Meanwhile his left hand was behind him, his left leg raised so that the foot was resting on one of the bookshelves, his puckered hole hiding slightly out of Ikkaku's view, but that hand with its long, artistic fingers was not. He could see clearly as Yumichika pumped his fingers in and out of his body, watching as he added an extra finger each time, stretching himself and preparing himself to be taken, and each time his digit scratched upon his pleasure spot he'd cry out loud and throw his head back, pulling harshly upon Ikkaku's predatory side. He loved the way Yumi's face would flush red, or how his back would arch until it seemed to almost break, and the high sounds of pleasure that tumbled into throaty moans were like a drug, one that made him want more and more.

 

Unable to hold back any longer, Ikkaku marched forward with heavy steps and beating heart, his eyes nearly black for how dilated in lust they were and his member weeping in desire and hard as stone. When he reached Yumi the first thing he did was wrench those hands from his cock and rear, jealous even of Yumi's own fingers, his desire to possess his lover so strong that he couldn't help but feel angry a hand other than his own had touched such sacred places. In his right hand he held tight onto both of Yumichika's wrists, pinning them high above his head, leaving his lover trapped against the wall and entirely dominated by Ikkaku. His face was now overwhelmed by an expression of lust, his lips wet and panting and skin red all over, and he was whispering almost incoherently for Ikkaku to take him.

 

Without warning Ikkaku pressed his lips firmly against Yumichika's and brought him into a passionate kiss, his rough tongue pushed into his lover's mouth and brought it to life, warring with it as they both tried to fight for some form of dominance, and yet both relishing in the moment enough to forgo any serious fight. He could taste Yumi's last meal on his lips, feel the heat and warmth of his mouth, and the very kiss made his erection cry for attention, making him crave his lover's touch all the more. His naked chest was pressed flush against Yumichika's and he could almost feel his lover's heartbeat as their bodies were brought together, and it made him growl possessively, forcing him to grab a hold of Yumi's legs and lift them off of the ground.

 

Yumichika gasped and threw his hands around Ikkaku's neck, holding tightly for support as he wrapped his legs around his lover's waist, his buttocks now perfectly aligned with Ikkaku's member. He wasn't surprised in the slightest as Ikkaku slowly pushed his way inside, without any preparation - not when he knew his lover had just prepared himself - yet to feel that long, thick cock inside him made him lose his breath. It just filled and stretched him so perfectly, it almost had him seeing stars, and despite the slight burn it all felt so good!

 

Ikkaku moaned loudly at the sensation of being inside of Yumichika. He couldn't believe after all these years that he'd still be shocked at how tight his lover was! It felt like those hot, inner walls were clamping down upon him with a force he never knew possible, milking him for all he was worth and consuming him as it they wanted to draw him ever deeper inside. One hand was braced underneath Yumi to support him, the other was wrapped around his erection pumping him hard, and each time he pumped he swore he'd feel those anal walls fluttering around him. Yumi was moaning over and over, swearing occasionally, and before long he couldn't help it, he had to move, to stay still inside that fantastic cavern was sheer torture.

 

He quickly began a hard and fast pace, unable to go softly or gentle, each thrust he purposely aimed for Yumi's pleasure spot and he nearly screamed in ecstasy each time his lover howled in bliss, in fact his teeth were already gnawing many love-bites over his body and his fingers leaving bruises wherever they touched. He knew it wouldn't be a long session, his body was just too overcome with lust and desire, the feeling of being connected with his lover - of being one with him - it was unlike any battle he'd ever had, it was such an adrenaline rush and the coursing pleasure was unlike any other. The feelings were indescribable, perfect, and the azure look of his eyes was like looking into the face of Love. In and out he went, setting a frantic and furious pace which none could rival and then - then he could feel Yumi coming, and hard it seemed.

 

His lover's eyes closed as his mouth opened into a powerfully loud scream, the sound echoing from the very walls themselves, and his fingernails drove into Ikkaku's back and raked long cuts into his tanned flesh. He could feel his lover spasm around him, his member pulsing as wave after wave of come splashed across his stomach, chest and over Ikkaku's hand too. The sight of that perfect man in the waves of passion caused him to nearly release, it was just so exotic, so erotic, and so fucking perfect!

 

Oh God, Ikkaku knew he'd be ready to explode soon, and Yumichika knew that too; despite being sensitive from coming, gasping for breath and hot as an inferno, his lover still purposely did the tricks Ikkaku loved best. He'd clench tight on each inward thrust, play with Ikkaku's nipples until they were hard as pebbles, then suck and nip at his lover's neck until it was as red and bruised as his own. It was enough to get his blood pounding, his head throbbing and his heart beating so loudly he was terrified it'd bust inside his chest. He could feel the sweat dripping down his back, feel the semen dripping off Yumi's stomach and onto his cock as it moved in and out, and soon he could feel the primal scream building in his lungs as he let out all his emotions vocally, loud enough to rival even Yumi's scream.

 

“Yu - Yumichika!”

 

He thrust in one final type and exploded inside his lover, he could feel his stomach clenching over and over again as wave after wave of come left him, leaving him drained and wondering how much more he could spend. His body felt exhausted, weak but as if he'd reached the brink of nirvana and was covered in a spiritual, emotional and physical ecstasy of enjoyment. His very soul was shaken to the core and his love for Yumichika seemed ten times as strong as ever, and when he captured those lips for a passionate kiss he barely even noticed the feeling as his cock slipped from that come-soaked hole, all he cared about was the man in his arms.

 

He gently lowered Yumichika's legs back to the floor and placed a soft kiss by his ear, whispering soft but sincere words, words that came from the very bottom of his heart and were meant with every fibre of his being: “I'm sorry, I love you, Yumi. I'm sorry for ever doubting you.”

 

The tears in Yumichika's eyes were almost as beautiful as his smile: “It's okay, I forgive you, and I love you too.”

 

The kiss they shared was so heartfelt and emotional that Ikkaku was almost lost in it, his very soul seeping into it and merging with Yumi's as they exposed their very hearts to one another through that one physical connection. They slipped lazily to the floor and basked in the afterglow, merely holding each other softly as they breathed heavily, trying to fight off sleep and find the strength to redress and rejoin their squad upstairs. Somehow nothing in the world seemed to matter that moment except each other, except holding each other, except that one perfect moment . . .

 

It was then they heard soft footsteps racing down the stairs into the admin room. Yumichika was the first to hear them and the first to panic, jumping up and immediately grabbing one of his paper documents - intended for Hitsugaya-Taichou - and began to wipe the come from his rear and front, whilst Ikkaku ran along the rows of bookcases and grabbed his clothes from the aisle. It seemed though that he wasn't quick enough to grab them without being seen, because immediately he turned his head and saw at the very end of the aisle their intruder. He screamed loudly as he realised he'd been caught naked and ducked back in between the two bookcases, ignoring Yumichika's almost hysterical laughter as he hastily redressed. Zaraki-Taichou was going to kill them; he was going to freaking kill them!

 

“Baldy!” Came the overly, sweet voice of Lieutenant Kusajishi, which immediately shut Yumichika up much to Ikkaku's amusement, “How come you're not dressed?”

 

Ikkaku hastily tied his obi around his hakama as he ducked back into the aisle to find his other items of clothing, his face was bright red and he was already planning his funeral mentally, wondering how Yumichika could not only dress so quickly but look so damned good and graceful doing it too. When he looked down the aisle to Yachiru she was simply standing there with her Zanpakuto trailing behind her, her face turned to one side as she kicked the floor lazily with her left foot, watching Ikkaku as he pulled on his footwear.

 

“Shit, Zaraki-Taichou is going to kill me!”

 

“Why?” Yachiru asked naively, “I've seen Kenny naked lots of times, children aren't allowed in the hot baths without parents after all!” She smiled broadly and then her face gave a very confused, criss-crossed expression, “Toshiro-kun refuses to go to the baths, but sometimes he does and he hates it because he has to go with Chesty and it makes him go red. There aren't any hot baths down here though, are there?”

 

“N-No, Kusajishi-Fukutaichou,” Ikkaku murmured nervously.

 

“So how come you were all naked?” She asked softly, “Is it something to do with your sparring with Feathers? You guys were so loud that we could hear you from the barracks! Ken-chan looked pretty mad, so I came down here to tell you off! Your sparring looks weird though . . . I don't get it.” She looked up at the ceiling whilst shaking her head to and fro, “I know! I'll ask Kenny! Ken-chan will tell me!”

 

“Kusajishi-Fukutaichou! W-wait!”

 

He was still struggling to pull on his kosode when the lieutenant had already sprinted out of the admin room to go ask the captain, her father, and Ikkaku knew right away he was doomed. Yachiru might be the lieutenant of Squad Eleven but she was still a child and still pretty innocent, if she were old enough to know what was happening she could have blackmailed him for at least a year afterwards, as it was her simple questioning curiosity were about to get him killed. Zaraki would beyond pissed they'd subjected her to something like that and he had no idea how the captain would explain it, and that was probably the reason he was going to die . . .

 

“Zaraki-Taichou will kill me,” Ikkaku moaned in a way that certainly wasn't manly.

 

“Nonsense!”

 

Yumichika appeared from behind the bookcases, humming loudly with his eyes closed and a brilliant `I just got some' smile plastered all over his face, his whole body glowing as he pranced about as if in a world of his own. He was fully dressed now and his hair was perfect too, almost as if he'd been hiding a comb somewhere inside his uniform for such an occasion. When Ikkaku gave him a look of complete devastation he just laughed and raised his sleeved hand to his mouth, covering his open mouth to remain `beautiful' as he laughed openly.

 

“He might beat you bloody but he certainly won't kill you,” Yumichika said softly. The words made him sag his shoulders in relief and thank the gods that there was some small mercy, as he watched Yumichika saunter off, “No, no! If anything will kill you it will be the humiliation when Kusajishi-Fukutaichou spreads this around the whole of Squad Eleven! Zaraki-Taichou is a smart man, even he knows some punishments are more effective than death.”

 

Ikkaku groaned.

 

Yumichika was probably right but he wasn't sure which he preferred, violent death by the hands of the captain or the whole of his squad knowing he'd just screwed Yumi's brains out down in admin . . . No, he knew full well which he'd prefer, and that was sudden and violent death by the hands of Zaraki-Taichou, because let's face it, like Yumi would let him screw him in public again from now on. No, death was definitely better, definitely . . .