Bleach Fan Fiction ❯ Seireitei Monogatari ❯ Rules of Behavior - Kenpachi ( Chapter 68 )

Title: Rules of Behavior

Pairings/Characters: Yamamoto, Kenpachi, Ichigo/Izuru, Other Captains of the Gotei 13

Rating: T

Warning: AU, Future Fic, Language

Words: 712

Description: Companion to Family Guy. “Zaraki-taichou, in the future, please refrain from bringing your children to the captain's meeting.”

 

 

Yamamoto thought he had seen it all when it came to Zaraki Kenpachi. Showing up out of the blue one day, killing the eleventh division captain and taking his position hadn't been enough. He'd also had a kid hanging from his shoulder, bright pink hair gleaming. And then not soon after, two other people showed up to promptly become his third and fifth seats.

 

Not only that, Zaraki somehow managed to churn out relatively useful Shinigami. Iba-fukutaichou and Abarai-fukutaichou for example. Though Yamamoto couldn't figure that one out either.

 

Still, Yamamoto could have never expected this.

 

Kenpachi stood in the doorway of the first division, the last to arrive to the captain's meeting. That wasn't at all unusual.

 

There was a gurgle.

 

But the baby in Kenpachi's arms was.

 

“Zaraki-taichou...” Yamamoto cleared his throat. “Why do you have an infant?”

 

The man shrugged, idly shoving a finger into the boy's mouth and giving him something to chew on. “Didn't know what else to do with it,” he responded. “Yumichika's busy, and Ikkaku's got the division. Ain't no way I'm leavin' 'im with Yachiru.”

 

“Where did you get it?” Soifon demanded, hands placed on her hips as she stared at the child, who was seemingly content in a bloodthirsty killer's arms.

 

Yamamoto suddenly paled, having terrible visions of Zaraki stalking up to some happy couple and knocking them out with either his reiatsu or his sword. Then scooping up their infant and running away, cackling all the while.

 

Okay. Maybe not the cackling part. But he would be grinning. Ferally.

 

“From an orphanage,” Kenpachi responded with another snort. “Where did ya think, dumbass?”

 

“They actually let you walk out with a child?” someone doubtfully commented under her breath.

 

“I got one, don't I?” Zaraki countered as the kid kicked him and chomped down on his finger. He swore under his breath and poked the infant in the belly.

 

A giggle immediately followed.

From the kid. Not the captain.

 

Across the way, Kurosaki rolled his eyes. “Feeling jealous, were we?” he questioned, thinking of his own brood as he teased Kenpachi.

 

“I think it's sweet,” Kira commented from beside his husband, encouraging a beaming smile from the former substitute.

 

“What's his name?” Jyuushiro asked pleasantly, dark eyes almost covetous as they admired Kenpachi's newest addition.

 

Obviously, no work was going to be completed today.

 

Shunsui groaned, slapping his face with a palm as he caught sight of his best friend's reaction. “I'm too young to be an uncle,” he complained. And then amended, “Again.”

 

However, it was Zaraki's reaction that bothered Yamamoto the most.

 

He blinked, looking surprised. “Name?” he repeated. “Dammit, I knew I forgot something. I've just been calling him kid. Seems to like it good enough.”

 

Jyuushiro was absolutely speechless as he stared at Zaraki. Kurosaki was snickering under his breath, shaking his head.

 

Zaraki merely shrugged, as if this was normal behavior. “Give me a few good days. I'll come up with somethin'.”

 

Yamamoto was certain he was never going to see everything from Zaraki. The man still continued to surprise him. And he had lived for two thousand years. Or died. However one wanted to look at it.

 

The unnamed baby burped and made a gurgle, which might have been a noise of contentment.

 

Noisily clearing his throat to restore order, the captain-commander swept his gaze over the group before pinning Zaraki. “In the future, Zaraki-taichou, please refrain from bringing your children to the captain's meeting.”

 

The man grinned. “Ain't makin' no promises if I can't find a babysitter.”

 

“I'm often free,” Jyuushiro quickly volunteered. “I would be happy to help.”

 

The realization suddenly struck Yamamoto out of absolutely nowhere with a startling reminder.

 

Zaraki Kenpachi was essentially a single father. Again.

 

How had he missed that?

 

It had to have been Ayasegawa. The fluttery fifth-seat threw off his perceptions.

 

But still... the most fearsome captain in the Gotei 13 was a single father.

 

Clearly, the world had ended.

 

*****