Blue Seed Fan Fiction ❯ Im-Mitama-Turity! ❯ One-Shot
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Galaxy_Girl 
The story! LOL... Come on, think real hard now about what the doctor is thinking...
Anime/Manga: Blue Seed Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 07.28.2002 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 1.3K | Status: Completed
The story! LOL... Come on, think real hard now about what the doctor is thinking...
Anime/Manga: Blue Seed Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 07.28.2002 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 1.3K | Status: Completed
Mitama Immaturity
by Galaxy Girl
A/N: Ohh, WOW! Blue Seed fanfiction by Galaxy Girl! ... Lord help us. -_-.
Anyway, this story will only be funny if you get what the doctor thinks Kusanagi is referring to by "mitama". Think about it really hard now... It's a part of the body... Ah, it'll make more sense if you read the story.
This idea was half-written by and inspired by an inside joke I've got going on with my sister, BB. That in turn was inspired by a line from Kusanagi in... oh, episode 18 or 19...
"My mitamas are burning!"
HAHAHAHAHA... uh... Don't read if you have any sort of maturity, or are insulted by a few plant-man jokes poking fun of Kus-Kus.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mamoru Kusanagi wasn't usually the type of person to go to the doctor's office, and he didn't intend to start now. But there was something wrong with his mitamas that he just could not ignore anymore.
He walked into the lobby, and tried to ignore the drooling stares of every woman in the waiting room. Shuffling up to the counter, he stuffed his hands in his pockets to hide their mitamas, and said in a low voice to the receptionist, "I need a walk-in appointment with the doctor."
"Oh, 'course, hon," the receptionist said, once she regained control of her drooling. "Just have a seat and we'll call you when the doctor's ready."
Kusanagi nodded and shuffled across the room, sliding into a chair against the wall. He looked at all the peaceful landscape paintings around the room, and then scanned briefly over the magazines on the table next to him.
He picked up a Home and Garden magazine, curious about the article that suggested lovely new ways to arrange leaves on your houseplants.
As he flipped through the magazine, the woman across the row from him caught a glimpse of the bright blue mitamas on his hands. Her eyes widened in horror, and she turned back to the cover of her Tokyo Enquirer magazine, which read:
GIANT EVIL PLANTS STALK CITY!
HA, IT'S A JOKE, SON! YOU GET IT?
She proceeded to pass out.
Now, Kusanagi would have been able to enter the exam room as soon as the next nurse came out, if only that woman hadn't passed out. That would have made the story go a lot more smoothly. But he couldn't, he didn't, and she did, and it won't. So he waited about another 20 minutes and finally, after the woman had been placed safely in the heart attack wing of the nearest hospital, a husky nurse appeared from the back room and called out, "Kusanagi? Mamoru Kusanagi? The doctor will see you now."
Kusanagi entered the exam room, and had a seat on the freezing cold metal table with that weird crinkly paper stuff on it. He stuffed his hands in his pockets again, and studied a happy clown picture on the wall.
The same husky nurse entered, carrying a clipboard. "OK, hon. Just take off your shirt so I can take your pulse and such."
"Are you sure about that?" asked Kusanagi.
"Well of course," the nurse scolded.
Kusanagi shrugged and threw his trenchcoat down on the table, then pulling off his shirt, revealing the finely tuned muscles beneath, as well as a few more mitamas.
The nurse proceeded, wide-eyed, to pull out a camera and take a picture for the collection in her office. "Thanks, hon."
"But what about the..." Kusanagi stuttered, as the nurse slammed the door shut.
"Put yer shirt back on for Mama, hon!" she cooed.
He raised a few eyebrows. "OOOK..."
Dr. Meisio Korama entered a few seconds later, wearing a thick pair of black glasses. "Hello, Mr. Kusanagi. A first time patient, are we?"
Kusanagi had put his shirt back on. "Yeah," he muttered. "I don't usually trust doctors, but I've been having some trouble with my mitamas lately."
"Your... mitamas?"
"Yes, my mitamas." Kusanagi replied.
"Ah... And exactly what would 'mitamas' be?"
"Uh... Doc... my MITAMAS." He made a downward motion.
"OOOOH. Your MITAMAS. Well y'know, Mr. Kusanagi, I'm really not that kind of doctor."
"Yeah, I know it's unusual for someone like me to have them, but I thought that you were trained with those kinds of things."
Dr. Korama looked confused. "Why, Mr. Kusanagi... It's not unusual at all for a man like yourself to have them. Most men do, actually."
"Really?" Kusanagi whistled. "That's news to me!"
The doctor set his clipboard and things down on the table next to Kusanagi, and grabbed a pen from the nearby desk to take notes. "Now, Mr. Kusanagi... These mitamas of yours. What do they look like?"
"Well, they're really small."
"Oh, that's not a medical problem, sir. It's just how you were built."
"Oh. Well anyway, they're round, and blue..."
"Blue?"
"Yes, blue. And they're smooth and shiny."
"Blue, smooth, and shiny?"
"Yes. Do you speak Japanese?"
"Certainly, sir. I'm just finding it hard to believe that yours are... ahem, blue."
"I thought all mitamas were blue."
"Oh no, sir, not all of them. In fact, hardly any of them are."
"Huh. Weird."
"OK... Anything else about them physically?"
"They glow in the dark."
"... They glow in the dark?"
"Yes. Oh, but only when Arigami are around."
Dr. Korama blinked confusedly. "OK... They glow in the dark... Are you, Mr. Kusanagi, by chance from Cherynobl?"
"Cherynobl? In Russia? Does that really matter?"
"Never mind... OK, now what's your problem with your mitamas, aside from the fact that they're blue?"
"They always look like that."
"... OK. But what's been your problem with them? Why did you come to see me?"
"They've been burning a lot lately."
"Burning?"
"Yeah. Like they're on fire."
"Do you know anyone else whose mitamas burn, Mr. Kusanagi?"
"Oh yeah, Momiji's does too. Sometimes."
"... Momiji?"
"Yeah, this girl I protect all the time."
"And she has mitamas?"
"Only one. That was a horrible accident, the one that gave her that one single mitama..."
The doctor raised his eyebrows. "They burn?"
"Yeah, and shoot spikes out of my back."
"...OK... And where on your body are your mitamas?"
"Well... I've got three on my chest, two on my hands, and..."
"How many mitamas do you HAVE, Mr. Kusanagi?"
"Seven. But I can only find five of them. I don't know where the other two are."
"..."
"You look worried, Doc. Anything wrong?"
"Oh no..."
"Oh, and don't tell me I'm missing one. I know that. Murakumo tells me I'm imperfect all the time. Just because he has eight mitamas and I only have seven."
"... SEVEN of them?"
"Yes, seven. I know it's normal to have eight, but..."
"Mr. Kusanagi, I don't know ANYONE who has eight mitamas."
"Really? I know lots of people."
"Ahem... Let's just... move on. Why do you think they burn, Mr. Kusanagi?"
"I'm pretty sure it's because Suzano-Oh is around."
"Who's Suzano-Oh?"
"This annoying little twerp who's the lord of the Aragami."
"... And what are Aragami?"
"These annoying little plant-monster parasites who are after my mitamas."
"Pardon me, Mr. Kusanagi, but that's really disgusting."
"Whaddya mean? So, enough with the questions. Are you going to have a look at my mitamas?"
"NO! NO!"
"Why are you screaming, Doc?"
"YOU'RE SICK, MR. KUSANAGI! ABSOLUTELY SICK!"
"EXCUSE ME?! Dr. Korama, I've never been so insulted in all my life! I come here to your office, assuming that what I am isn't going to bother you! It's not my fault I'm part Aragami, after all!"
"GOOD LORD, YOU'RE ONE OF THEM!"
"I am NOT! I'm BETRAYING them by coming here! I NEED you to see my mitamas, and tell me what's wrong with them!"
"I'm not that kind of doctor!"
"AAGGH..." Kusanagi screams, clutching his hands in agony. "They're... They're burning again..."
Dr. Korama backs against the wall, terrified. "NO! I DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM!"
With this, Kusanagi rips off his shirt in disgust, pointing at one of his mitamas. "LOOK! Look how swollen it is! I need help, Doc!"
Dr. Korama stops screaming and gasps, glimpsing Kusanagi's flashing mitama. "... OH! OOOHHH! THAT kind of mitama! Good Lord, man, why didn't you say so?"
"I DID SAY SO!"
"You did not!"
"Did too! What did you think I meant?"
The doctor paused, biting his lip. "I thought you meant..."
"Oh, JEEZ. That's disgusting. I don't think I want to trust the health of my mitamas to such a perverted doctor!" Kusanagi snapped, rolling his eyes and putting his trenchcoat back on.
"But I'm not-"
"Farewell, doctor!" he growled, stomping towards the door and throwing it open, heading out into the lobby. "GET AWAY FROM ME! MY MITAMAS ARE ABOUT TO EXPLODE!"
There was the sound of women shrieking and covering their children's eyes and ears.
As Kusanagi left the doctor's office, he threw his hands in his pockets again. "What horrible people!" he cried indignantly to no one in particular.
He leapt up onto the roof, pulling a small slip of paper out of his pocket and reading over the address, shaking his head.
"I guess I really shouldn't have gone to a family physician that doesn't take HMOs."
~END!
by Galaxy Girl
A/N: Ohh, WOW! Blue Seed fanfiction by Galaxy Girl! ... Lord help us. -_-.
Anyway, this story will only be funny if you get what the doctor thinks Kusanagi is referring to by "mitama". Think about it really hard now... It's a part of the body... Ah, it'll make more sense if you read the story.
This idea was half-written by and inspired by an inside joke I've got going on with my sister, BB. That in turn was inspired by a line from Kusanagi in... oh, episode 18 or 19...
"My mitamas are burning!"
HAHAHAHAHA... uh... Don't read if you have any sort of maturity, or are insulted by a few plant-man jokes poking fun of Kus-Kus.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mamoru Kusanagi wasn't usually the type of person to go to the doctor's office, and he didn't intend to start now. But there was something wrong with his mitamas that he just could not ignore anymore.
He walked into the lobby, and tried to ignore the drooling stares of every woman in the waiting room. Shuffling up to the counter, he stuffed his hands in his pockets to hide their mitamas, and said in a low voice to the receptionist, "I need a walk-in appointment with the doctor."
"Oh, 'course, hon," the receptionist said, once she regained control of her drooling. "Just have a seat and we'll call you when the doctor's ready."
Kusanagi nodded and shuffled across the room, sliding into a chair against the wall. He looked at all the peaceful landscape paintings around the room, and then scanned briefly over the magazines on the table next to him.
He picked up a Home and Garden magazine, curious about the article that suggested lovely new ways to arrange leaves on your houseplants.
As he flipped through the magazine, the woman across the row from him caught a glimpse of the bright blue mitamas on his hands. Her eyes widened in horror, and she turned back to the cover of her Tokyo Enquirer magazine, which read:
GIANT EVIL PLANTS STALK CITY!
HA, IT'S A JOKE, SON! YOU GET IT?
She proceeded to pass out.
Now, Kusanagi would have been able to enter the exam room as soon as the next nurse came out, if only that woman hadn't passed out. That would have made the story go a lot more smoothly. But he couldn't, he didn't, and she did, and it won't. So he waited about another 20 minutes and finally, after the woman had been placed safely in the heart attack wing of the nearest hospital, a husky nurse appeared from the back room and called out, "Kusanagi? Mamoru Kusanagi? The doctor will see you now."
Kusanagi entered the exam room, and had a seat on the freezing cold metal table with that weird crinkly paper stuff on it. He stuffed his hands in his pockets again, and studied a happy clown picture on the wall.
The same husky nurse entered, carrying a clipboard. "OK, hon. Just take off your shirt so I can take your pulse and such."
"Are you sure about that?" asked Kusanagi.
"Well of course," the nurse scolded.
Kusanagi shrugged and threw his trenchcoat down on the table, then pulling off his shirt, revealing the finely tuned muscles beneath, as well as a few more mitamas.
The nurse proceeded, wide-eyed, to pull out a camera and take a picture for the collection in her office. "Thanks, hon."
"But what about the..." Kusanagi stuttered, as the nurse slammed the door shut.
"Put yer shirt back on for Mama, hon!" she cooed.
He raised a few eyebrows. "OOOK..."
Dr. Meisio Korama entered a few seconds later, wearing a thick pair of black glasses. "Hello, Mr. Kusanagi. A first time patient, are we?"
Kusanagi had put his shirt back on. "Yeah," he muttered. "I don't usually trust doctors, but I've been having some trouble with my mitamas lately."
"Your... mitamas?"
"Yes, my mitamas." Kusanagi replied.
"Ah... And exactly what would 'mitamas' be?"
"Uh... Doc... my MITAMAS." He made a downward motion.
"OOOOH. Your MITAMAS. Well y'know, Mr. Kusanagi, I'm really not that kind of doctor."
"Yeah, I know it's unusual for someone like me to have them, but I thought that you were trained with those kinds of things."
Dr. Korama looked confused. "Why, Mr. Kusanagi... It's not unusual at all for a man like yourself to have them. Most men do, actually."
"Really?" Kusanagi whistled. "That's news to me!"
The doctor set his clipboard and things down on the table next to Kusanagi, and grabbed a pen from the nearby desk to take notes. "Now, Mr. Kusanagi... These mitamas of yours. What do they look like?"
"Well, they're really small."
"Oh, that's not a medical problem, sir. It's just how you were built."
"Oh. Well anyway, they're round, and blue..."
"Blue?"
"Yes, blue. And they're smooth and shiny."
"Blue, smooth, and shiny?"
"Yes. Do you speak Japanese?"
"Certainly, sir. I'm just finding it hard to believe that yours are... ahem, blue."
"I thought all mitamas were blue."
"Oh no, sir, not all of them. In fact, hardly any of them are."
"Huh. Weird."
"OK... Anything else about them physically?"
"They glow in the dark."
"... They glow in the dark?"
"Yes. Oh, but only when Arigami are around."
Dr. Korama blinked confusedly. "OK... They glow in the dark... Are you, Mr. Kusanagi, by chance from Cherynobl?"
"Cherynobl? In Russia? Does that really matter?"
"Never mind... OK, now what's your problem with your mitamas, aside from the fact that they're blue?"
"They always look like that."
"... OK. But what's been your problem with them? Why did you come to see me?"
"They've been burning a lot lately."
"Burning?"
"Yeah. Like they're on fire."
"Do you know anyone else whose mitamas burn, Mr. Kusanagi?"
"Oh yeah, Momiji's does too. Sometimes."
"... Momiji?"
"Yeah, this girl I protect all the time."
"And she has mitamas?"
"Only one. That was a horrible accident, the one that gave her that one single mitama..."
The doctor raised his eyebrows. "They burn?"
"Yeah, and shoot spikes out of my back."
"...OK... And where on your body are your mitamas?"
"Well... I've got three on my chest, two on my hands, and..."
"How many mitamas do you HAVE, Mr. Kusanagi?"
"Seven. But I can only find five of them. I don't know where the other two are."
"..."
"You look worried, Doc. Anything wrong?"
"Oh no..."
"Oh, and don't tell me I'm missing one. I know that. Murakumo tells me I'm imperfect all the time. Just because he has eight mitamas and I only have seven."
"... SEVEN of them?"
"Yes, seven. I know it's normal to have eight, but..."
"Mr. Kusanagi, I don't know ANYONE who has eight mitamas."
"Really? I know lots of people."
"Ahem... Let's just... move on. Why do you think they burn, Mr. Kusanagi?"
"I'm pretty sure it's because Suzano-Oh is around."
"Who's Suzano-Oh?"
"This annoying little twerp who's the lord of the Aragami."
"... And what are Aragami?"
"These annoying little plant-monster parasites who are after my mitamas."
"Pardon me, Mr. Kusanagi, but that's really disgusting."
"Whaddya mean? So, enough with the questions. Are you going to have a look at my mitamas?"
"NO! NO!"
"Why are you screaming, Doc?"
"YOU'RE SICK, MR. KUSANAGI! ABSOLUTELY SICK!"
"EXCUSE ME?! Dr. Korama, I've never been so insulted in all my life! I come here to your office, assuming that what I am isn't going to bother you! It's not my fault I'm part Aragami, after all!"
"GOOD LORD, YOU'RE ONE OF THEM!"
"I am NOT! I'm BETRAYING them by coming here! I NEED you to see my mitamas, and tell me what's wrong with them!"
"I'm not that kind of doctor!"
"AAGGH..." Kusanagi screams, clutching his hands in agony. "They're... They're burning again..."
Dr. Korama backs against the wall, terrified. "NO! I DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM!"
With this, Kusanagi rips off his shirt in disgust, pointing at one of his mitamas. "LOOK! Look how swollen it is! I need help, Doc!"
Dr. Korama stops screaming and gasps, glimpsing Kusanagi's flashing mitama. "... OH! OOOHHH! THAT kind of mitama! Good Lord, man, why didn't you say so?"
"I DID SAY SO!"
"You did not!"
"Did too! What did you think I meant?"
The doctor paused, biting his lip. "I thought you meant..."
"Oh, JEEZ. That's disgusting. I don't think I want to trust the health of my mitamas to such a perverted doctor!" Kusanagi snapped, rolling his eyes and putting his trenchcoat back on.
"But I'm not-"
"Farewell, doctor!" he growled, stomping towards the door and throwing it open, heading out into the lobby. "GET AWAY FROM ME! MY MITAMAS ARE ABOUT TO EXPLODE!"
There was the sound of women shrieking and covering their children's eyes and ears.
As Kusanagi left the doctor's office, he threw his hands in his pockets again. "What horrible people!" he cried indignantly to no one in particular.
He leapt up onto the roof, pulling a small slip of paper out of his pocket and reading over the address, shaking his head.
"I guess I really shouldn't have gone to a family physician that doesn't take HMOs."
~END!