Boys Over Flowers Fan Fiction ❯ Once in a lifetime Opportunity ❯ No I can't let you ( Chapter 2 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: ldymoon 
Trapped in a snow storm what will Sojiro and Yuuki do?
Anime/Manga: Boys Over Flowers Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Drama | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 09.16.2009 | Pages: 4 | Words: 7.8K | Visits: 1.5K | Status: Completed
Trapped in a snow storm what will Sojiro and Yuuki do?
Anime/Manga: Boys Over Flowers Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Drama | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 09.16.2009 | Pages: 4 | Words: 7.8K | Visits: 1.5K | Status: Completed
~o0o~
It had been a few days into the vacation and true to his word he was a total gentleman when Makino and the others were around, but whenever he had a chance to be alone with her he felt vindictive, spiteful. He’d say snide remarks about how she kidnapped his son. He knew he was being a bastard, but he felt he couldn’t help himself. It was driving him crazy watching her smile and laugh and be so carefree and love on his son while he held himself back. What made him more pissed was the fact that every time he had a chance to be with his son she came and herded little Soji away and denied him the privilege of speaking to him. He had had enough when he was outside with Soji building a snowman with the rest of F4 and Yuuki came and brought Soji into the house.
“Aww mom I want to finish making the snow man withc”
“Soji none of that now. I don’t want you getting sick you have to go back to school soon and I have to go to work and I can’t miss anymore days.”
“Why? Doctor Arcand won’t be mad at you.”
Yuuki looked up at Sojiro with fear etched on her brow and then slightly raised her voice to Soji. “Now look here young man you do what I asked you to do.”
“Come on now Matsuoka-Chan we’re just having some fun.” Akira said with a begging face. “Can’t he stay out and play just a little longer. I promise we’ll bring him in andc”
“No, I’m sorry Soji gets sick easily.”
“Tsk, that’s just an excuse she doesn’t want him around me.”
The air started to have a stagnant feel and Akira always being the peacemaker tried to lighten the atmosphere. “That’s not true right Matsuoka-chan.” Yuuki gave Sojiro an angry look as she pushed her son into the house and turned to face Sojiro.
“Don’t say things like that in front of him.”
“Don’t say what huh?”
“You know what!”
“That you don’t want him to get to know me.”
Yuuki shushed him and looked behind her at the house.
“Why can’t the kid get to know Sojiro, he’s his father.” Tsukasa said with irritation evident on his brows.
“Becausec.” Yuuki said looking at Tsukasa “I don’t want him knowing that Sojiro is his father. I don’t think that will be good for him.”
“You bitch!” Sojiro spat out. Akira and Rui held his arms. But then Rui had to speak in his cool uninterested tone of voice. “You shouldn’t deny your son from his father, when he gets older he’ll resent you for it. On top of that, that kid is smarter than you think, you insult his intelligence. That child wants to spend time with Sojiro because he already knows who is father is.”
“cbe that as it may, I can’t let Soji be with Nishikado-san I don’t want my son getting hurt. Please Nishikado-san, please keep your distance.”
Sojiro broke free of their hold and grabbed Yuuki by the arm and dragged her back into the house. She tried to break free of his hold but he was too angry even his friends looked on with worry and tried to follow him but one look at his face and they stopped.
“Sojiro, don’t do anything stupid man!” Akira said with worry. “I’m going to ask all of you to entertain Makino and Soji for me it’s way past time for Yuuki and I to have our little chat.” With that he continued to drag her to another wing of the mansion. Once he found a room in the domestic’s quarters he pushed her inside and she fell to the floor wrapping her hand on her arm where she knew it would be bruised. “What’s the meaning of this?”
“Are you seeing someone?” He all about hissed out. “Yes.” Sojiro began to pace the room when a maid entered “oh excuse me sir.” She bowed “Get the hell out.” Was his low command. He might as well have yelled it the way the maid paled and ran out of there. When he had closed the door and locked it behind him he pulled Yuuki from up off the floor and began pacing again like some caged tiger. “Is it this Doctor Arcand guy?”
“I don’t see how any of this isc.”
He pushed her against the wall and slammed his hand into the wall for emphasis. Yuuki winced. “Answer my damn question. “Yes.”
“Are you trying to get this guy to be a father to Soji?”
“Sojiro, does this really matter? You’re not a part of our lives, Soji may think you’re his father and if he asks I won’t lie but there is nothing between us.”
“Are you trying to get this guy to be a father to Soji?”
“c.Ic.don’t know.”
“Did you sleep with him huh?”
“I don’t see how that is any of your business!”
Sojiro took his hand and started to feel up her thigh. Yuuki pushed it away. With his other hand he felt on her breast and she pushed that away too. “Nishikado-san what are you doing? Stop it!”
“What after us you just started to whore yourself out to this doctor? Come on he gave you a free service and a job what did you give him in return huh?” Then he grabbed her crotch and squeezed hard. “Ow, Sojiro your hurting me!” And she slapped him in the face hard but he didn’t quit he pressed his body into hers as she panicked. “Oh come on now, you wanted to sleep with me one time before what’s it to a whore huh? You take my son away from me and try to give him to another man some old bastard who couldn’t get a family for some reason. You know you really had my ass fooled back then. I thought you were different than all the other little skanks I slept with but you’re no different only you succeeded in stealing my own son from me, I’ve been thinking about you this whole damn time and you were laughing at me behind my back with my son in your arms! Weren’t you you little slut! And you want to pass him off to some freaking bastard! Tsk while we were here I already had this guy checked out. A forty five year old man whose been divorced twice once for infidelity he was caught having an affair with a nurse did he tell you that? Huh? The second for neglect and you want that bastard raising my child? A forty five year old man who wants to get his sick thrills by sleeping with a girl twenty two years his junior! You’re a freaking cunt is what you are, well let me give you one more good ride before you get with that old asshole! You’re going to regret laughing at me!”
He tore her sweater and started kissing down her neck running his hands on her waist. He was seeing only one hazy color and it was green He picked her up and pulled her pants down tearing the button and the zipper and was rubbing his fingers on the top of her cotton panty. He was being driven crazy, was going crazy. Just thinking about being with that doctor and his son being raised by another man made him lose his mind. It was like he was having an outer body experience he was watching on cheering from somewhere when he heard crying? It was like his mind snapped and the light was switched on and he was no longer in the darkness, with startled eyes he looked down at Yuuki’s red face with her swollen kissed lips and her sweater and pants torn immediately he took his hands off of her and backed away shocked shaking his head in morbid disbelief. He’s never assaulted a woman. His back slammed against the locked door and he slid down and squatted on the floor and put his head between his knees and started crying. Now it was Yuuki’s turn to look on at him with wild wonderment in her eyes.
After sitting in the room with just silence Sojiro stood up without looking at her. With a low voice but loud enough for her ears to hear he said “no other man but me is raising him, I’m an adult, I’m already running my father’s branch in Spain when this is over I’m taking my son with me.” And left the room leaving Yuuki hysterical and terrified and again on his way down the hall he punched another hole.
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“Tsukushi I’m sorry but we’ll be leaving tomorrow.” Tsukushi was sitting on the bed in shock Yuuki told her what had happened. “I don’t blame you, butcI can’t blame him either. You are denying him the right to get to know Soji.” Both girls looked at the sleeping child. Yuuki was quiet. “Why? Why won’t you let him get to know Soji?”
“Because. How will Soji feel that he can’t be with his mother and his father at the same time huh? Nishikado-san doesn’t want me.”
“Are you sure about that? I mean you said it was weird, he didn’t hurt you, not really in fact he was gentle all except the ripping of your clothes but only he scared you, not that I condone what he’d done and when I get to him he’s going to get it for being an offender but, I can’t help but think about that one time with Domyouji remember that time? He did something similar to me, after looking at it, he did it because he was jealous that I had liked Hanazawa Rui at that time. Nishikado-kun must feel the same way about that doctor you work for and he said he was always thinking about you. Yuuki after you had gone he wasn’t the same. He didn’t go hanging out with Mimasaka-kun as much. It was months later that he started going back out.”
“Tsukushi please!” Tsukushi was taken aback by the forceful shout and then they both looked over at the sleeping child. Than Yuuki continued more quietly. “I know this is selfish of me, I really do, but, I want it all. Is that asking for too much? I want a man who wants to be with only me and my son.”
“Yuuki you’re not being fair. Nishikado-kun isn’t like that. You don’t understand how he feels. I found out through Mimasaka-kun and Hanazawa Rui that he himself is a bastard child, but that it is not spoken of. His mom, the one who raised him lost her own newborn baby and that because of it she didn’t leave the house for a month, it was said she was overseas but in fact she was mourning. When his father had come home it was with a baby Nishikado-kun who was about the same age as the one that died. Mimasaka-kun said that Nishikado-kun is actually about a good three weeks older than the baby that died but that he had to take on that baby’s day of birth. It was when his mom, the one who raised him was drunk one night because she was upset with his father for going around philandering that Nishikado-kun had learned the truth. The only reason he is where he is today was because of chance. His mom, the one who raised him wasn’t able to have any more children because his father had given her a disease and it ruined her chances she had tried but she had many miscarriages after that and then she gave up leaving Nishikado-kun to inherit everything. She loves him, and hates him at the same time, so she is always strict with him but then feels guilty about treating him bad. Hanazawa Rui says that it’s because of this that Nishikado-kun doesn’t think he is capable of love and fears that he will be like his father.”
Yuuki shook her head. She started crying for such a hurt man. He was a kind man but he even said he wasn’t a good one but she saw the good in him. Even now, even now that he said such awful things to her and assaulted her, she couldn’t hate him, but it didn’t change anything.
“Tsukushicit’s still a lost cause. He doesn’t love me andcand even if he didcit still doesn’t change anything. He still believes that he cannot love.”
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The day she was planning on leaving the snow started to get heavy. She kept looking out the window and jumped every time she heard a noise. She was trying to get out of there as quickly as possible before he came down and realized that she was gone. Maybe his friends can talk some sense into him. She already planned on telling her son the truth when they got back home and tell him why she couldn’t allow them to be together but when he gets older if he wanted to he could go and see him. She planned on telling him that living in that life would not be healthy if she weren’t there. Also, she had the information that Sojiro had given her about her doctor that she had to consider. For the most part she was very nice to the man but she didn’t share in his romantic feelings but she was very grateful for the opportunities that he gave her. She shook her head, now wasn’t the time to be thinking these things she needed to get home and clear her head. She looked out the window and couldn’t see the drive way anymore. She walked into the living area where her son was supposed to be watching television.
She listened as the news caster was going over the weather and how there was going to be a blizzard coming through the mountains were they were. She was hoping that the cab will come quickly when she finally heard that the road that leads to the mountain had been shut down and that no one was allowed to travel through it.
“Damn. Oh well. Soji come on it looks like we’re going tocSoji? Soji where are you?”
At that moment Tsukushi came in carrying popcorn with Tsukasa following her with a DVD. “Have you guys seen Soji?”
“Yeah, I saw him playing out in the snow earlier when we went into the kitchen.” Tsukasa said putting the DVD in the player. Yuuki went running toward the kitchen with Tsukushi behind her and Tsukasa yelling for his woman to come back and sit down with him to watch the movie. A few minutes later all three of them were outside looking for the kid.
“Damn it where is that brat!” Tsukasa growled out Tsukushi hit him in the ribs with her elbow. “Ow that hurt!”
“Can’t you be more sensitive?” He looked over at Yuuki who was on the verge of tears.
“Look, there are plenty of places for him to hide in this house and easy to get lost in this place. I’ll get the guys to help me look, he’s probably found some old hiding place we use to hide in when we were younger. We’ll find him.” With that he went into the house. Yuuki kept staring off toward the white snow that kept getting faster and faster.
“Come on we’ll help look okay.” Tsukushi said tapping Yuuki on the shoulder than went into the house talking about how he’s probably asleep somewhere but by the time she turned around to look at her friend, Yuuki was gone. “Whac.Yuuki! Yuuki! She went running into the snow when a hard warm hand wrapped around her waist. “Tsukasa you’ve got to let me go we got to get Yuuki!”
“We will get Yuuki but you’re not going anywhere this time. Last time you almost died in the snow looking for her.” He pulled out a satellite phone and called Rui once they were back inside.
“Yuuki ran out into the snow looking for the kidcyou found him?....wherec.sleeping with Sojiro!”
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Rui had knocked on the door to Sojiro’s room, for the entire day Sojiro stayed in his room probably thinking about what they had all talked about the night before. The night before Sojiro confessed to his friends what he did and said to Yuuki while drinking.
“What the hell did you do that for? That’s not like you.” Akira asked him.
“Hell if I know.”
“You should apologize to her.”
“Hell no, she wants that old bastard to raise my child.”
Tsukasa smiled and gave his friend the eye of all knowledge. “What?” Sojiro asked a bit creeped out.
“You love her.”
Now all of them laughed except Rui of course. “Come on I can’t love any female remember, it’s me Nishikado Sojiro.”
“No, you love her, I did the same thing to Makino back in school when she had her crush on Rui here.”
“Don’t go bringing up old things.” Rui said giving Tsukasa the evil eye. Thinking about Makino getting hurt always made his mood go sour.
“Nah, listen back in the day when those two used to go to their secret place on the stairs I had found them and got angry. It was after I had treated Makino all nice and what not.”
“Tsk, you treated Makino nice?” Sojiro said sarcastically and then hit the beer bottle with Akira’s.
“No listen, I was so angry that she preferred Rui at that time that Icwellcmy emotions got the best of me. I wound up doing what you did Sojiro, but that’s because I liked her and I wanted her to like me see?”
“Hmm, I think Tsukasa here has a point Sojiro.” Akira said than continued. “I mean, you haven’t really been the same since you bedded her.”
“Nah, she’s opened my eyes she’s no different from the rest of them. She tricked me with her innocent ways.”
“So you saying Makino’s friend wasn’t ‘innocent’?”
“No, I mean, she was a virgin butc”
“You slept with a virgin? Isn’t one of your rules that you stay away from virgins?” Tsukasa asked.
“Yeah, it was but she said she was leaving to come to Canada soc”
“Then why did you sleep with her?” Rui asked.
“BecausecI owed her.”
“So how did she trick you?” Rui asked again.
“She pretended to be a nice girl, but, she kept the fact that she had a child by me.”
“hmmcwere you supposed to have a long distance relationship with her or something?” Tsukasa asked now.
“No, it was supposed to be for that weekend, but the next day she left.”
“Did you give her a reason to stay?” Akira asked this time.
“What is this... freaking twenty questions! No alright, she said she was going to Canada, I told her that I could never love her like she wanted me to I gave her plenty of chances to get out but she wanted to be with me. I gave her a pretty great night and gave her the works alright! I freaking treated her like a princess I treated her like I was in love with her, gave her a bath, washed her hair fed her and made love with her so many freaking times I couldn’t count. Anymore freaking questions?”
“So you told her that you weren’t in love with her.” Rui said coolly.
“Yeah, what’s your point?”
“But you made love to her?”
“Look I know what it sounds like but that was the least I could do for her ok.”
“Did you wear a condom at all during that night?” Rui said pointedly.
Sojiro’s face paled all the times flashed in to his head and he remembered that there was something being said to him, but he couldn’t hear it, his own voice saying somethingcbut he ignored it. He was so busy being absorbed by her he didn’t listen to it.
“So, you tell her that you didn’t love her, but that she’s important to you. You have sex with her showed her a really good time and while doing this you didn’t protect her by wearing what I know you always slip on no matter who you’re with. And she’s the whore how? She’s a lying cunt in what way? How did you expect her to call you up and say anything to you when you so much as told her that you don’t want anything else to do with her after that weekend. It was a chance to be together, you took her virginity and got her pregnant. It was your negligence and it became her responsibility for life, you called her all those shameful things and threaten to take her son away for your mistake. You are far more knowledgeable than she was. You knew she loved you and instead of turning her around and sending her back home with a gift of thanks for her helping you out you decided to get her pregnant and then get mad at her forc.”
“Shut up Rui I get it alright. I screwed up, butc”
Akira put his hand on his shoulder and shook his head in the negative. “Dude, I know you and you don’t do stuff like that for girls. You either took advantage of her or you really have feelings for her. If you did love her you can’t get mad that she kept Soji from you. It’s not like you came out to see her or anything after that incident especially being that she left before you woke up that morning. She bruised your ego there bro, In fact, you didn’t even go seek her out the next day or the day she left. She left because she was probably confused by your love making with her. Your actions pretty much told her that it was a onetime deal. If she took that action to see if you would seek her out you failed. All girls have a test, maybe it was a test for herself, I’ve got two sisters I’ve seen them both through a few crushes. She figured you told her the truth and took her memory for what it was and left you alone. She didn’t have to tell you anything.”
“Are you all done now?”
“No, you love her, why don’t you just admit it to her and then everything will be ok.” Tsukasa chimed in taking another swig of his beer. “She might give you a hard time just like Makino did me, because their poor people, they don’t understand how to make things simple. They only know hardship, but, if you keep at it she’ll recognize your feelings andc”
“Look Tsukasa, just because you got a good thing with Makino doesn’t mean that we all can be so lucky. We all wanted to be you and have Makino in our lives I guess at one point I was envious of your relationship and probably imagined that I could have something like that with Yuuki, butcI’m a bastard ok, I’m my father’s seed just like mom tells me often, I can’t help but be the way I am. I didn’t take advantage ok, I gave her plenty of outs butcI didn’t want to hurt her. I did care for her because she reminded me or Makino or was close to itc”
Tsukasa had developed an irritation on his brow. “All of you were trying to get with Makino?” Rui pushed him out of the way and asked a question that didn’t have to deal with Makino Tsukushi, although he didn’t know either that Sojiro had a crush on her.
“And you want to hurt her now?” Rui said coolly again.
“No.”
“Then you know what you got to do. Leave her with the kid. Write the kid letters, send her money, do your part, but don’t take her treasure away. I’ve seen her with him these past few days and she loves your son. Maybe you should give him the life with love that you’ve always wanted.” Akira added somberly while sitting on Tsukasa.
“c.I’m tired now can you all leave. Thanks.”
They all got up and started to walk out slapping a comrade hand on his shoulder. “I still think that you should just admit you love her. If you saw green it was because you were jealous, if you didn’t protect her from getting pregnant it’s because you wanted to keep her. Trust me, I’m used to getting what I want. We all are. It makes us upset when the thing we want doesn’t want us, that’s why you did to her what you did today. As that saying goes if you let it go and it doesn’t come back you can throw that fish back in the sea.”
“Idiot you mixing two different principles together is it really ok that you’re going to rule the financial world?” Sojiro said to his friend as he smiled weakly. Tsukasa smiled warmly. “You know that whatever I said I’m still right. I’m always right I am Tsukasa Domyouji after all. Oh and by the way, if I find out you tried to make a movec”
Sojiro pushed him away smiling. “As if I’d want Makino now, she’s far too abusive and indecisive hahaha.” Then, looking at his friend seriously and in a very serious tone of voice continued “besides, I couldn’t steal her from you even if I wanted, Rui lost to you, that girlcshe’s far too much in love with you to even think about a playboy like me. Although I’ll take care of her if you and Rui diechahaha.”
Tsukasa wasn’t laughing though and had to be physically pushed out of the room and the door shut on him and with that he was left in his room to think about his life and since then he’d been in his room and he hadn’t come out. And now Rui was knocking on his door.
“Come in.”“Aww mom I want to finish making the snow man withc”
“Soji none of that now. I don’t want you getting sick you have to go back to school soon and I have to go to work and I can’t miss anymore days.”
“Why? Doctor Arcand won’t be mad at you.”
Yuuki looked up at Sojiro with fear etched on her brow and then slightly raised her voice to Soji. “Now look here young man you do what I asked you to do.”
“Come on now Matsuoka-Chan we’re just having some fun.” Akira said with a begging face. “Can’t he stay out and play just a little longer. I promise we’ll bring him in andc”
“No, I’m sorry Soji gets sick easily.”
“Tsk, that’s just an excuse she doesn’t want him around me.”
The air started to have a stagnant feel and Akira always being the peacemaker tried to lighten the atmosphere. “That’s not true right Matsuoka-chan.” Yuuki gave Sojiro an angry look as she pushed her son into the house and turned to face Sojiro.
“Don’t say things like that in front of him.”
“Don’t say what huh?”
“You know what!”
“That you don’t want him to get to know me.”
Yuuki shushed him and looked behind her at the house.
“Why can’t the kid get to know Sojiro, he’s his father.” Tsukasa said with irritation evident on his brows.
“Becausec.” Yuuki said looking at Tsukasa “I don’t want him knowing that Sojiro is his father. I don’t think that will be good for him.”
“You bitch!” Sojiro spat out. Akira and Rui held his arms. But then Rui had to speak in his cool uninterested tone of voice. “You shouldn’t deny your son from his father, when he gets older he’ll resent you for it. On top of that, that kid is smarter than you think, you insult his intelligence. That child wants to spend time with Sojiro because he already knows who is father is.”
“cbe that as it may, I can’t let Soji be with Nishikado-san I don’t want my son getting hurt. Please Nishikado-san, please keep your distance.”
Sojiro broke free of their hold and grabbed Yuuki by the arm and dragged her back into the house. She tried to break free of his hold but he was too angry even his friends looked on with worry and tried to follow him but one look at his face and they stopped.
“Sojiro, don’t do anything stupid man!” Akira said with worry. “I’m going to ask all of you to entertain Makino and Soji for me it’s way past time for Yuuki and I to have our little chat.” With that he continued to drag her to another wing of the mansion. Once he found a room in the domestic’s quarters he pushed her inside and she fell to the floor wrapping her hand on her arm where she knew it would be bruised. “What’s the meaning of this?”
“Are you seeing someone?” He all about hissed out. “Yes.” Sojiro began to pace the room when a maid entered “oh excuse me sir.” She bowed “Get the hell out.” Was his low command. He might as well have yelled it the way the maid paled and ran out of there. When he had closed the door and locked it behind him he pulled Yuuki from up off the floor and began pacing again like some caged tiger. “Is it this Doctor Arcand guy?”
“I don’t see how any of this isc.”
He pushed her against the wall and slammed his hand into the wall for emphasis. Yuuki winced. “Answer my damn question. “Yes.”
“Are you trying to get this guy to be a father to Soji?”
“Sojiro, does this really matter? You’re not a part of our lives, Soji may think you’re his father and if he asks I won’t lie but there is nothing between us.”
“Are you trying to get this guy to be a father to Soji?”
“c.Ic.don’t know.”
“Did you sleep with him huh?”
“I don’t see how that is any of your business!”
Sojiro took his hand and started to feel up her thigh. Yuuki pushed it away. With his other hand he felt on her breast and she pushed that away too. “Nishikado-san what are you doing? Stop it!”
“What after us you just started to whore yourself out to this doctor? Come on he gave you a free service and a job what did you give him in return huh?” Then he grabbed her crotch and squeezed hard. “Ow, Sojiro your hurting me!” And she slapped him in the face hard but he didn’t quit he pressed his body into hers as she panicked. “Oh come on now, you wanted to sleep with me one time before what’s it to a whore huh? You take my son away from me and try to give him to another man some old bastard who couldn’t get a family for some reason. You know you really had my ass fooled back then. I thought you were different than all the other little skanks I slept with but you’re no different only you succeeded in stealing my own son from me, I’ve been thinking about you this whole damn time and you were laughing at me behind my back with my son in your arms! Weren’t you you little slut! And you want to pass him off to some freaking bastard! Tsk while we were here I already had this guy checked out. A forty five year old man whose been divorced twice once for infidelity he was caught having an affair with a nurse did he tell you that? Huh? The second for neglect and you want that bastard raising my child? A forty five year old man who wants to get his sick thrills by sleeping with a girl twenty two years his junior! You’re a freaking cunt is what you are, well let me give you one more good ride before you get with that old asshole! You’re going to regret laughing at me!”
He tore her sweater and started kissing down her neck running his hands on her waist. He was seeing only one hazy color and it was green He picked her up and pulled her pants down tearing the button and the zipper and was rubbing his fingers on the top of her cotton panty. He was being driven crazy, was going crazy. Just thinking about being with that doctor and his son being raised by another man made him lose his mind. It was like he was having an outer body experience he was watching on cheering from somewhere when he heard crying? It was like his mind snapped and the light was switched on and he was no longer in the darkness, with startled eyes he looked down at Yuuki’s red face with her swollen kissed lips and her sweater and pants torn immediately he took his hands off of her and backed away shocked shaking his head in morbid disbelief. He’s never assaulted a woman. His back slammed against the locked door and he slid down and squatted on the floor and put his head between his knees and started crying. Now it was Yuuki’s turn to look on at him with wild wonderment in her eyes.
After sitting in the room with just silence Sojiro stood up without looking at her. With a low voice but loud enough for her ears to hear he said “no other man but me is raising him, I’m an adult, I’m already running my father’s branch in Spain when this is over I’m taking my son with me.” And left the room leaving Yuuki hysterical and terrified and again on his way down the hall he punched another hole.
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“Tsukushi I’m sorry but we’ll be leaving tomorrow.” Tsukushi was sitting on the bed in shock Yuuki told her what had happened. “I don’t blame you, butcI can’t blame him either. You are denying him the right to get to know Soji.” Both girls looked at the sleeping child. Yuuki was quiet. “Why? Why won’t you let him get to know Soji?”
“Because. How will Soji feel that he can’t be with his mother and his father at the same time huh? Nishikado-san doesn’t want me.”
“Are you sure about that? I mean you said it was weird, he didn’t hurt you, not really in fact he was gentle all except the ripping of your clothes but only he scared you, not that I condone what he’d done and when I get to him he’s going to get it for being an offender but, I can’t help but think about that one time with Domyouji remember that time? He did something similar to me, after looking at it, he did it because he was jealous that I had liked Hanazawa Rui at that time. Nishikado-kun must feel the same way about that doctor you work for and he said he was always thinking about you. Yuuki after you had gone he wasn’t the same. He didn’t go hanging out with Mimasaka-kun as much. It was months later that he started going back out.”
“Tsukushi please!” Tsukushi was taken aback by the forceful shout and then they both looked over at the sleeping child. Than Yuuki continued more quietly. “I know this is selfish of me, I really do, but, I want it all. Is that asking for too much? I want a man who wants to be with only me and my son.”
“Yuuki you’re not being fair. Nishikado-kun isn’t like that. You don’t understand how he feels. I found out through Mimasaka-kun and Hanazawa Rui that he himself is a bastard child, but that it is not spoken of. His mom, the one who raised him lost her own newborn baby and that because of it she didn’t leave the house for a month, it was said she was overseas but in fact she was mourning. When his father had come home it was with a baby Nishikado-kun who was about the same age as the one that died. Mimasaka-kun said that Nishikado-kun is actually about a good three weeks older than the baby that died but that he had to take on that baby’s day of birth. It was when his mom, the one who raised him was drunk one night because she was upset with his father for going around philandering that Nishikado-kun had learned the truth. The only reason he is where he is today was because of chance. His mom, the one who raised him wasn’t able to have any more children because his father had given her a disease and it ruined her chances she had tried but she had many miscarriages after that and then she gave up leaving Nishikado-kun to inherit everything. She loves him, and hates him at the same time, so she is always strict with him but then feels guilty about treating him bad. Hanazawa Rui says that it’s because of this that Nishikado-kun doesn’t think he is capable of love and fears that he will be like his father.”
Yuuki shook her head. She started crying for such a hurt man. He was a kind man but he even said he wasn’t a good one but she saw the good in him. Even now, even now that he said such awful things to her and assaulted her, she couldn’t hate him, but it didn’t change anything.
“Tsukushicit’s still a lost cause. He doesn’t love me andcand even if he didcit still doesn’t change anything. He still believes that he cannot love.”
cc
The day she was planning on leaving the snow started to get heavy. She kept looking out the window and jumped every time she heard a noise. She was trying to get out of there as quickly as possible before he came down and realized that she was gone. Maybe his friends can talk some sense into him. She already planned on telling her son the truth when they got back home and tell him why she couldn’t allow them to be together but when he gets older if he wanted to he could go and see him. She planned on telling him that living in that life would not be healthy if she weren’t there. Also, she had the information that Sojiro had given her about her doctor that she had to consider. For the most part she was very nice to the man but she didn’t share in his romantic feelings but she was very grateful for the opportunities that he gave her. She shook her head, now wasn’t the time to be thinking these things she needed to get home and clear her head. She looked out the window and couldn’t see the drive way anymore. She walked into the living area where her son was supposed to be watching television.
She listened as the news caster was going over the weather and how there was going to be a blizzard coming through the mountains were they were. She was hoping that the cab will come quickly when she finally heard that the road that leads to the mountain had been shut down and that no one was allowed to travel through it.
“Damn. Oh well. Soji come on it looks like we’re going tocSoji? Soji where are you?”
At that moment Tsukushi came in carrying popcorn with Tsukasa following her with a DVD. “Have you guys seen Soji?”
“Yeah, I saw him playing out in the snow earlier when we went into the kitchen.” Tsukasa said putting the DVD in the player. Yuuki went running toward the kitchen with Tsukushi behind her and Tsukasa yelling for his woman to come back and sit down with him to watch the movie. A few minutes later all three of them were outside looking for the kid.
“Damn it where is that brat!” Tsukasa growled out Tsukushi hit him in the ribs with her elbow. “Ow that hurt!”
“Can’t you be more sensitive?” He looked over at Yuuki who was on the verge of tears.
“Look, there are plenty of places for him to hide in this house and easy to get lost in this place. I’ll get the guys to help me look, he’s probably found some old hiding place we use to hide in when we were younger. We’ll find him.” With that he went into the house. Yuuki kept staring off toward the white snow that kept getting faster and faster.
“Come on we’ll help look okay.” Tsukushi said tapping Yuuki on the shoulder than went into the house talking about how he’s probably asleep somewhere but by the time she turned around to look at her friend, Yuuki was gone. “Whac.Yuuki! Yuuki! She went running into the snow when a hard warm hand wrapped around her waist. “Tsukasa you’ve got to let me go we got to get Yuuki!”
“We will get Yuuki but you’re not going anywhere this time. Last time you almost died in the snow looking for her.” He pulled out a satellite phone and called Rui once they were back inside.
“Yuuki ran out into the snow looking for the kidcyou found him?....wherec.sleeping with Sojiro!”
cc
Rui had knocked on the door to Sojiro’s room, for the entire day Sojiro stayed in his room probably thinking about what they had all talked about the night before. The night before Sojiro confessed to his friends what he did and said to Yuuki while drinking.
“What the hell did you do that for? That’s not like you.” Akira asked him.
“Hell if I know.”
“You should apologize to her.”
“Hell no, she wants that old bastard to raise my child.”
Tsukasa smiled and gave his friend the eye of all knowledge. “What?” Sojiro asked a bit creeped out.
“You love her.”
Now all of them laughed except Rui of course. “Come on I can’t love any female remember, it’s me Nishikado Sojiro.”
“No, you love her, I did the same thing to Makino back in school when she had her crush on Rui here.”
“Don’t go bringing up old things.” Rui said giving Tsukasa the evil eye. Thinking about Makino getting hurt always made his mood go sour.
“Nah, listen back in the day when those two used to go to their secret place on the stairs I had found them and got angry. It was after I had treated Makino all nice and what not.”
“Tsk, you treated Makino nice?” Sojiro said sarcastically and then hit the beer bottle with Akira’s.
“No listen, I was so angry that she preferred Rui at that time that Icwellcmy emotions got the best of me. I wound up doing what you did Sojiro, but that’s because I liked her and I wanted her to like me see?”
“Hmm, I think Tsukasa here has a point Sojiro.” Akira said than continued. “I mean, you haven’t really been the same since you bedded her.”
“Nah, she’s opened my eyes she’s no different from the rest of them. She tricked me with her innocent ways.”
“So you saying Makino’s friend wasn’t ‘innocent’?”
“No, I mean, she was a virgin butc”
“You slept with a virgin? Isn’t one of your rules that you stay away from virgins?” Tsukasa asked.
“Yeah, it was but she said she was leaving to come to Canada soc”
“Then why did you sleep with her?” Rui asked.
“BecausecI owed her.”
“So how did she trick you?” Rui asked again.
“She pretended to be a nice girl, but, she kept the fact that she had a child by me.”
“hmmcwere you supposed to have a long distance relationship with her or something?” Tsukasa asked now.
“No, it was supposed to be for that weekend, but the next day she left.”
“Did you give her a reason to stay?” Akira asked this time.
“What is this... freaking twenty questions! No alright, she said she was going to Canada, I told her that I could never love her like she wanted me to I gave her plenty of chances to get out but she wanted to be with me. I gave her a pretty great night and gave her the works alright! I freaking treated her like a princess I treated her like I was in love with her, gave her a bath, washed her hair fed her and made love with her so many freaking times I couldn’t count. Anymore freaking questions?”
“So you told her that you weren’t in love with her.” Rui said coolly.
“Yeah, what’s your point?”
“But you made love to her?”
“Look I know what it sounds like but that was the least I could do for her ok.”
“Did you wear a condom at all during that night?” Rui said pointedly.
Sojiro’s face paled all the times flashed in to his head and he remembered that there was something being said to him, but he couldn’t hear it, his own voice saying somethingcbut he ignored it. He was so busy being absorbed by her he didn’t listen to it.
“So, you tell her that you didn’t love her, but that she’s important to you. You have sex with her showed her a really good time and while doing this you didn’t protect her by wearing what I know you always slip on no matter who you’re with. And she’s the whore how? She’s a lying cunt in what way? How did you expect her to call you up and say anything to you when you so much as told her that you don’t want anything else to do with her after that weekend. It was a chance to be together, you took her virginity and got her pregnant. It was your negligence and it became her responsibility for life, you called her all those shameful things and threaten to take her son away for your mistake. You are far more knowledgeable than she was. You knew she loved you and instead of turning her around and sending her back home with a gift of thanks for her helping you out you decided to get her pregnant and then get mad at her forc.”
“Shut up Rui I get it alright. I screwed up, butc”
Akira put his hand on his shoulder and shook his head in the negative. “Dude, I know you and you don’t do stuff like that for girls. You either took advantage of her or you really have feelings for her. If you did love her you can’t get mad that she kept Soji from you. It’s not like you came out to see her or anything after that incident especially being that she left before you woke up that morning. She bruised your ego there bro, In fact, you didn’t even go seek her out the next day or the day she left. She left because she was probably confused by your love making with her. Your actions pretty much told her that it was a onetime deal. If she took that action to see if you would seek her out you failed. All girls have a test, maybe it was a test for herself, I’ve got two sisters I’ve seen them both through a few crushes. She figured you told her the truth and took her memory for what it was and left you alone. She didn’t have to tell you anything.”
“Are you all done now?”
“No, you love her, why don’t you just admit it to her and then everything will be ok.” Tsukasa chimed in taking another swig of his beer. “She might give you a hard time just like Makino did me, because their poor people, they don’t understand how to make things simple. They only know hardship, but, if you keep at it she’ll recognize your feelings andc”
“Look Tsukasa, just because you got a good thing with Makino doesn’t mean that we all can be so lucky. We all wanted to be you and have Makino in our lives I guess at one point I was envious of your relationship and probably imagined that I could have something like that with Yuuki, butcI’m a bastard ok, I’m my father’s seed just like mom tells me often, I can’t help but be the way I am. I didn’t take advantage ok, I gave her plenty of outs butcI didn’t want to hurt her. I did care for her because she reminded me or Makino or was close to itc”
Tsukasa had developed an irritation on his brow. “All of you were trying to get with Makino?” Rui pushed him out of the way and asked a question that didn’t have to deal with Makino Tsukushi, although he didn’t know either that Sojiro had a crush on her.
“And you want to hurt her now?” Rui said coolly again.
“No.”
“Then you know what you got to do. Leave her with the kid. Write the kid letters, send her money, do your part, but don’t take her treasure away. I’ve seen her with him these past few days and she loves your son. Maybe you should give him the life with love that you’ve always wanted.” Akira added somberly while sitting on Tsukasa.
“c.I’m tired now can you all leave. Thanks.”
They all got up and started to walk out slapping a comrade hand on his shoulder. “I still think that you should just admit you love her. If you saw green it was because you were jealous, if you didn’t protect her from getting pregnant it’s because you wanted to keep her. Trust me, I’m used to getting what I want. We all are. It makes us upset when the thing we want doesn’t want us, that’s why you did to her what you did today. As that saying goes if you let it go and it doesn’t come back you can throw that fish back in the sea.”
“Idiot you mixing two different principles together is it really ok that you’re going to rule the financial world?” Sojiro said to his friend as he smiled weakly. Tsukasa smiled warmly. “You know that whatever I said I’m still right. I’m always right I am Tsukasa Domyouji after all. Oh and by the way, if I find out you tried to make a movec”
Sojiro pushed him away smiling. “As if I’d want Makino now, she’s far too abusive and indecisive hahaha.” Then, looking at his friend seriously and in a very serious tone of voice continued “besides, I couldn’t steal her from you even if I wanted, Rui lost to you, that girlcshe’s far too much in love with you to even think about a playboy like me. Although I’ll take care of her if you and Rui diechahaha.”
Tsukasa wasn’t laughing though and had to be physically pushed out of the room and the door shut on him and with that he was left in his room to think about his life and since then he’d been in his room and he hadn’t come out. And now Rui was knocking on his door.
“Sojiro, Soji is missing we think he’s hiding out somewhere in this house.”
“Nah, he’s cool look on the bed he fell asleep so I put him there.”
“Ah, good.”
Rui was about to leave the room and report the news so that he can go to his room and take a nap before it was time for dinner when his phone rang. “What’s going on? Yeah I found him, he was in Sojiro’s roomc.what? Ok.” He flipped his phone off and looked at Sojiro. “Yuuki went into the storm looking for Soji.” They both looked at the window and saw the snow and it’s winds raging outside.
ccccc.
How the hell was he going to find her? How would he know in which direction she had gone. He remembered what Tsukasa said. “Trust your animal instinct you will find your mate I found Makino that time remember!” Sojiro shook his head, how could he have bought that BS? But here he was on the snow bike looking for Yuuki who got lost in this storm. He tried to look for foot prints or anything but it was hard to see and on top of that her foot steps have all been covered up already. What if she was already buried in this snow somewhere? He began to panic and almost got angry he decided to take a breather. He closed his eyes inhaled and then exhaled slowly he opened his eyes when he saw a motion on his right it could’ve been his mind playing tricks but right now he couldn’t take any chances. And he was sure glad that he didn’t. He found her sitting under a tree and the movement he saw was more snow that had fallen on her. Quickly he got off the snow mobile and pulled her up out of the snow. He quickly wrapped her in the thick thermal blanket that Makino had put on the snow bike.
“Yuuki! Yuuki wake up!”
“Soc.Sojic.gotctoc.”
“Soji&# 8217;s fine he’s back at the house.” He took a quick look at her and noticed that she was turning blue quickly he placed her on his lap and unbutton his coat and put half her body in it with that large thermal blanket covering them he quickly sped off in the direction of the little cabin that Tsukasa had bought the day that he woke up with Makino in his arms. It was in no time that they got there and he urgently pushed the door open with too much unnecessary force since it was unlocked conveniently; Sojiro had to put on a mental smile for his friend he wasn’t so dumb after all if he had planned a secret rendezvous. He shook his mental thoughts and placed Yuuki on an overstuffed chair with the blanket wrapped around her. He started a fire right away and quickly got his snow suit off. He drew a hot bath and then proceeded to remove her clothing but she stayed his hand. “Come on Yuuki, you’ll get pneumonia if you don’t already got it or worsec.you need to be healthy you have to take care of our son right?”
She looked at him skeptically while her ice cold hand held as tightly as it could to his wrist. Her breathing labored due to the fact that she was shivering so hard. “Yuuki.” He shook off her frozen hand and her head fell back against the wall softly. “That’s a crazy thing you didcgoing off like that on your own.”
With teeth chattering she responded “my sonc.heccould havecbeencout therecI’mchiscmoctherc.ifche’sc.scaredc.he needsc.mec”
She stated crying again visualizing him out there freezing to death in the snow. She thanked god that he was alright that he wascwait was Sojiro telling the truth? She shot up and bumped her head into his while he was undoing her clothes to get her warmed up. “Ow what the hell?”
“Is hecreallyc.is he?” The tears were overwhelming her as well as her freezing body.
“Yes, he was in my room talking to me before he fell asleep.” Yuuki visibly mouthed a thank you to God as she sagged back against the wall. They were quiet while he undid her clothes and put her in the steamy bathtub to thaw out. He sat in the living area stoking the fire and sipping on the wine that was there in the cabin when he heard the door open and she came out. Immediately he rushed her and got her to sit in front of the fire with a large plaid thermal blanket and gave her the warm wine to drink.
“You really had me worried; I wondered if I was going to find you out there in that mess.”
He touched her still damp hair that was still cut short and curled just at the top of her neck line exposing the full length of the back of her neck. And it still looked just as soft and sweet as it did a few years back. He shook his head stood up and went and got the towel in the bathroom than dumped it on her head and started towel drying it better.
“Nishikado-san what are you doing?”
“What does it look like I’m doing I’m drying your hair. How do you feel? Do you feel hot, chilly?” He then moved the towel and put his hand on her forehead while his other hand touched his own forehead. “Damn I can’t tell this way.” He heard her giggle. “What?”
“I’m alright Nishikado-san, I’ve been living up here for a few years now socI kind’ve adapted to my environment besides I know a doctor he can help if I do get sick.”
“Does this Dr. Arcand guy love you?”
It was way too soft and too serious. Yuuki just looked at him quietly for a moment. She’s seen Soji look this way whenever she takes away anything good when he’s misbehaving. Her eyes softened but she replied firmly. She’ll be honest with him. Maybe they got stuck here on purpose; maybe it was fate, maybec
“I believe he does.”
“Do you love him?”
“cI’m grateful to him. When I found out I was pregnant I tried to hide it from my parents however, because I was binding my stomach I had passed out while I was walking home from school. It was Dr. Arcand who had found me and brought me to the hospital. He had called my parents; he was there when my family found out my condition and when my father disowned me because I had shamed our family. I didn’t tell him who fathered my child. I was eighteen years old then I had still to finish high school and because I wasn’t allowed home anymore and I had a baby to take care of; so he had kindly helped me out. He helped get me the apartment I am in now and the job. I was able to go to school and go to college because he had helped mec.but even with all that and knowing that he cares for me, I do not feel the same way he does. And a part of me feels shamed for that.”
“I seecsocthat meansc”
“Don’t get me wrong Nishikado-san, he did ask me to marry him and I told him that I would seriously consider his offer.”
It was like that one feather of hope had suddenly been zapped by a rare lightning bolt and became nothing but dust.
“But you don’t love himc”
“Love is something that is over rated. I’m not the same naïve girl of seventeen when I was helplessly in love with you. I had given away my heart a long time ago. Life, every day living is what I have to go by. Living on my own I’ve learned to be stronger and thanks to you I had a reason to be strong, without that memory and that gift who knows? But as for Dr. Arcand-san, I respect him; he can support me and my child. He loves Soji, he gives Soji everything he needs and everything he wants. Dr. Arcand-san is not a very rich man or very powerful but, the life he has to offer is very ideal for Soji. A mother and a father who come home from work sit down at a family table share a meal together, family vacationsc a very normal quiet family life.”
“What about passion? What kind of ‘normal’ life is Soji going to have when he can see as plain as day that you are not in love with this guy? What kind of life lesson is he going to learn from that?”
“Sacrifice.”
“Sacrifice?&# 8221;
“I love Soji, he is my first priority not myself. I don’t need love or passion, in exchange for taking care of my beloved son I will do my duty as a wife and even that is not enough. That is the sacrifice, my son’s happiness over my own.”
“Yuuki, what if you can have it all? Please come back to Tokyo with me, you and Sojiro. I’ll be going to Spain in just a months’ time we could marry and honey moon there.”
Yuuki was laying down now and she looked up at the ceiling and sighed. Sojiro leaned up on an elbow and looked down into her eyes. “I’m serious, my mom won’t care who I marry, I found that out a couple of years back. My fatherche doesn’t so much care either. I guess they both figured that since I’m Tsukasa’s friend that I’d follow in the trend that he set and marry whomever I want. F4 won’t care in fact they’d be happy and Soji can have both of us his biological parents, I can give him everything he needs and wants and you will have passion in your marriage.”
She looked him dead in the eyes as if looking through his soul; he saw within hers a wisdom that he wasn’t used to seeing in her eyes; the eyes of a full grown mature woman who had seen the real life. “If I were to get with you I’d want it all Nishikado-san and I don’t think you can give me the one thing I would ask for and it isn’t much really, I would not be asking for a lot.”
“What the hell do you mean? I can give you money, power, you want a job, I can give you that, although you’d never really have to work. What? You want your own company, business? Anything, you want family vacations we can go anywhere around the world it’s at your disposal. Our son, he can go to the best schools he can have anything he desires, I can be strict I don’t have to spoil him, one Tsukasa is enough and if he and Makino have kids wellc” He looked at her as she was shaking her head. “What? What can’t I give you?”
Tears were welling up in her eyes again. She didn’t want to give him the answer and even if she did and he was willing to give her what she desired from him, it’s too late. Nothing can change. He kissed her and she kissed him back. “I can give you whatever you desire Yuukic” He kissed her again and again the flame ignited between them both. For him, this felt natural his senses were happy to feel her again, it was like they had found Shangri-La.
“So can the devil, butcit’s only a temporary satisfaction, once caught in the web it is near impossible to get out.” His hands roamed her body hungrily as his kisses on her throat were hot licks of flames that trailed down to her bosom. “You still want me Yuuki; you know you still love me.”
“I do, I still love you, but I canc leave youcahc”
He was thrusting deep into her body; he didn’t even know how this began how did he get to be inside of her? One moment they’re talking about sacrifice and family vacations and the next he was showing her the passion that would be denied her if she marries that doctor. And this insane conversation they were having wasn’t making much sense. He slowly pulled out of her she was still so damn tight it brought shivers to both of them than slowly he made his way through again kissing her neck and biting her ear as he slid deep into her body. Biting her ear from the sensual pleasure that rippled through his body he whispered into the shell of her ear “I don’t understand what the hell you’re saying you still love me, but you’d leave me? Why? Why do something so utterly foolish?” He felt her nails digging into his back she locked her ankles around his hips and met each thrust with one of her own matching his rhythm he took that moment to lift her up and set her on the coffee table and thrust into her small framed body covered in their sweat.
“Tocprotectcme, I can’tcnoc”
He pulled her hands off of him and pinned them above her head on the table. While he thrust into her his other hand trailed down from her soft swollen parted lips and stopped to have his finger sucked gently than down her neck through the valley and traced the small scar from where his son was pulled he pumped into her faster more furiously. High on the fact that this woman was in his arms again, hopeful with that thought that if she loves him he still has a chance of getting everything he wants. This made him feel happy and he felt himself tighten as his stomach coiled in knots “What do you mean to protect, I’d protect youc Yuuki.” She shivered and cried out loudly as she convulsed around his throbbing flesh. He let go of her hands and lay his head on her chest and listened to her heart beat. This was the most bizarre sex conversation he’s ever had in his entire life usually the talk is dirty and filthy he still didn’t understand what the conversation was about, he just knew that whatever it was about physically it was the opposite of what was said. He felt her arms around his shivering form and they had hugged like that until her breathing returned to normal and that’s when she finally replied to his question about protection.
“To protect me, I can’t live the life your mother lives.”
Sojiro eyes widened he sat up so abruptly that he gave himself a slight headache he looked at her briefly with a shocked expression and noticed her sad one he turned his face from hers and couldn’t look her in the eyes. Without looking at her he offered her her robe back. Pulling the blanket around his waist he got up to go make a bath.
“Nishikado-sancI’m sorrycbutc”
“Tsk, after what we just shared you should call me Sojiro don’t you think?” He said this with a tone of voice that was humorous but his body language was the opposite without looking at her he felt his throat closing and felt a stinging in his eye so he hurried to the bathroom.
The next day they made it back to the mansion safe and she went immediately to her son embracing him and holding onto him as if he were her life jacket on a ship that was going down. She turned around and looked at him while holding her son. She smiled sadly and he smiled back and quietly left to his room. He stayed locked up in his room for the next couple of days sadly and torturingly reliving the memory that they had shared once again and going over everything that she said. She loved him but had no problem leaving him; she loved him but had no problem marrying a man she didn’t love because he can offer her security? She didn’t have to worry about the Nishikado gene of philandering. She’s hoping that her son doesn’t have that gene and if he does to condition it with normal family life? But mixed in with these thoughts and flashbacked conversations he remembered the feel of smooth skin beneath his hand, the curl of her hair at the nape of her neck, the sweet scent on her skin, the small scar that proved she bore his child, his son. He watched the taxi pull up through his window and saw his son look up into his room with a sad wondering face, no it was a face of questioned abandonment. Sadly he waved from the window and saw his son wave back. Looking at Yuuki he could see that she was crying when she finally looked up at him through the window. As he watched the taxi pull away and out of sight he continued to remember that night two nights ago.