Buffy The Vampire Slayer Fan Fiction ❯ The Jacaranda Tree ❯ Chapter 4
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: prophecygirl 
Non Anime: Buffy The Vampire Slayer Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.10.2007 | Pages: 1 | Words: 660 | Visits: 224 | Status: Completed
Non Anime: Buffy The Vampire Slayer Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.10.2007 | Pages: 1 | Words: 660 | Visits: 224 | Status: Completed
Buffy's cancer grew and Faith's belly swelled and Roy's T-cell numbers shrank. Mama kept sending her down home meals. Dawn kept calling and talking to the answering machine. Giles kept sending money, but the amounts began to dwindle. Times were not easy as summer was ushered in at the gingerbread house. The jacaranda was wilting again, seemingly along with the rest of their odd little family. Roy took over its care once again as Faith's belly got too big for her to bend.
Buffy spent most days on the pullout couch, sketching the windows and everything on the other side of them. Her energy had been sapped, and she found it hard to care about anything. This was her second summer back in California, and she felt very insignificant among the surfer boys and golden beauties.
Summer was still in its early days when Faith first noticed the specks of blood that quickly became more and more. Roy sat for hours in the emergency room with her while Buffy paced the kitchen anxiously, thinking. She thought about life and God and somewhere in the back of her mind she remembered that female rabbits under great duress will absorb their litters back into their bodies to protect them.
Rabbit, Rabbit on the first of the month. Buffy saw a rabbit nibbling some clover that had sprouted up around the jacaranda and burst into tears. She knew.
Faith came back looking pale and drawn, like someone had stolen the soul from her body.
Maybe they had.
Faith curled up beside Buffy on the pullout and Buffy wrapped her long arms around her. Roy checked on them, two pairs of birdbone shoulders pressed against each other. He made tabouli for dinner, but no one was really hungry.
Roy slept upstairs that night, sacrificing his bed to his girls.
~*~
A tangle of limbs surrounded Buffy as the other girl kissed her desperately. She wanted so bad to sink into it, give in, feel something for once. The moon shone brightly on the blossoms outside the window.
She pushed Faith away gently.
"I can't." Faith gave her a wounded-puppy look. "You're my best friend. I love you. But I can't be with you."
Faith didn't hear anything else, because her world shattered with the rejection. Her eyes were broken mirror bits, flashing in the moonlight. She got up, got into the shower numbly and scrubbed until her skin was bloody raw painful. Her thoughts swirled around her hopelessly, engulfing her over the sound of the water splashing about her legs.
She came out of the shower red and broken. Buffy waited outside in the hallway for her.
The frail blonde tried desperately to speak, but there were no words for how she felt. Tangled and torn. How could she take on Faith's love when her own thoughts were too much of a burden for her?
"I'm going to die, Faith," she said hoarsely. Her voice strangled and strained to be heard. She put her hand up to stop Faith's protests. "I'm okay with it. But you're not. And that's okay. But I can't hurt you more by being with you and then leaving. I have to know it's okay to leave."
Faith's eyes welled with unwanted tears as she dug her nails into her palms. "You're not even fighting it."
Buffy retained her solemn look. "I've been fighting, and it's too hard now. I can't fight my body anymore." Her voice cracked. "I'm not giving up. I need to feel safe and warm and not be in pain. Please," she started crying as well, "Please let me go."
She turned and walked away.
Buffy spent most days on the pullout couch, sketching the windows and everything on the other side of them. Her energy had been sapped, and she found it hard to care about anything. This was her second summer back in California, and she felt very insignificant among the surfer boys and golden beauties.
Summer was still in its early days when Faith first noticed the specks of blood that quickly became more and more. Roy sat for hours in the emergency room with her while Buffy paced the kitchen anxiously, thinking. She thought about life and God and somewhere in the back of her mind she remembered that female rabbits under great duress will absorb their litters back into their bodies to protect them.
Rabbit, Rabbit on the first of the month. Buffy saw a rabbit nibbling some clover that had sprouted up around the jacaranda and burst into tears. She knew.
Faith came back looking pale and drawn, like someone had stolen the soul from her body.
Maybe they had.
Faith curled up beside Buffy on the pullout and Buffy wrapped her long arms around her. Roy checked on them, two pairs of birdbone shoulders pressed against each other. He made tabouli for dinner, but no one was really hungry.
Roy slept upstairs that night, sacrificing his bed to his girls.
~*~
A tangle of limbs surrounded Buffy as the other girl kissed her desperately. She wanted so bad to sink into it, give in, feel something for once. The moon shone brightly on the blossoms outside the window.
She pushed Faith away gently.
"I can't." Faith gave her a wounded-puppy look. "You're my best friend. I love you. But I can't be with you."
Faith didn't hear anything else, because her world shattered with the rejection. Her eyes were broken mirror bits, flashing in the moonlight. She got up, got into the shower numbly and scrubbed until her skin was bloody raw painful. Her thoughts swirled around her hopelessly, engulfing her over the sound of the water splashing about her legs.
She came out of the shower red and broken. Buffy waited outside in the hallway for her.
The frail blonde tried desperately to speak, but there were no words for how she felt. Tangled and torn. How could she take on Faith's love when her own thoughts were too much of a burden for her?
"I'm going to die, Faith," she said hoarsely. Her voice strangled and strained to be heard. She put her hand up to stop Faith's protests. "I'm okay with it. But you're not. And that's okay. But I can't hurt you more by being with you and then leaving. I have to know it's okay to leave."
Faith's eyes welled with unwanted tears as she dug her nails into her palms. "You're not even fighting it."
Buffy retained her solemn look. "I've been fighting, and it's too hard now. I can't fight my body anymore." Her voice cracked. "I'm not giving up. I need to feel safe and warm and not be in pain. Please," she started crying as well, "Please let me go."
She turned and walked away.