Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction / Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ A Fistful Of Omake ❯ A Dreadful Father Omake ( Chapter 36 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Yet Another "What If Ranma Was Raised By" omake
by Gregg Sharp

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Soun ran for the door, a moment behind Nabiki. "Saotome! My old friend!"

Nabiki got to the door first, opened it, and *froze* as if she'd seen something far scarier than a rampaging giant panda.

"Sao..." Soun reached the door and his hair turned white. "Eeep. Mommy."

Genma was there, all right, looking moderately frightened. He'd come by once since his son's disappearance years ago, something to do with a training exercise being interrupted by the authorities, but had not had this young man with him.

"Soun Tendo?" The young man asked. "My biological father here tells me you know something about the location of a wanted criminal. May we come in?"

Soun nodded and backed away, pausing only to pull his petrified daughter along behind him.

Kasumi's sharp intake of breath and Akane's silent "whoa" both indicated that the significance of the boy's uniform was not lost on them.

"Uhm, you can't carry firearms in Japan?" Soun tried to point out.

"I'll show you the permits if you like, Tendo-san. Ladies." The young man nodded towards the girls. "Oh yes, introductions. My name is Ranma Saotome, though on-duty I go by the name of Judge Ranma. Sorry if I'm not up on the niceties of Japanese customs, I've been in Megacity One with my sempai Judge Dredd for several years since my bio-father committed several incidents of Petty Theft and a Reckless Endangerment Of A Juvenile."

"Uhm, right," said Soun, well aware of the reputation of the Judges. Shoot First, Shoot Often, Arrest The Remains. "Well, uhm, did your Father mention the honor agreement between families?"

Ranma's eyes were flat. "He mentioned that a perp from a few years back would be expected to show up here. A felon. Numerous cases of Petty Theft, Assault, Assault With A Deadly Weapon, Sexual Assault, Fraud, Identity Theft, Lying To A Law Officer, Attempted Murder, and numerous other incidents. You apparently studied under him?"

"Yes, the dread Master, he's no longer with us," said Soun. "He's passed on."

"Judge Anderson indicates he'll likely return to his two pupils. So this is where I'll wait for him." Judge Ranma indicated.

"He'll return from the grave?" Nabiki eeped.

"Seen that sort of thing before," indicated the Judge. "Ain't pretty. So what honor agreement were you talking about?"

"Uhm, well you see..."

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Nabiki went to school first. Why? Because she had to dismantle her network and caution everyone who would listen just WHAT was coming to school today. Anyone linking her to underage pornography, blackmail, or gambling was going down with her!

Akane went to school, convincing herself that just because the Judges had a reputation - they were not true martial artists and therefore she could beat Ranma. Right? Right!

Kasumi decided she liked Ranma's uniform and oh my - wasn't it so much quieter and more peaceful in the neighborhood all of a sudden?

Ranma walked behind Akane. He didn't like being in Japan. Too quiet.

"Akane! I love you!" "Don't let anyone else beat you, Akane!" "Akane! I'll defeat you in the name of love!"

*click* *click*

The assembled throng stopped as suddenly someone was in front of Akane and he had two really damn big guns pointed in their direction.

"Do I understand that you are trying to Assault With Deadly Force and considering Rape?" Judge Ranma asked in a sweet voice.

Much shaking of heads.

One of the slightly quicker morons added a qualifier. "Uhm. This is just a, uhm, morning ritual. To decide who is worthy of asking Akane out?"

The guns weren't moving. "Tendo-san? Did you agree to this ritual?"

Akane wasn't paying attention, otherwise she could have said "no" and had someone arrest the Horde Of Hentai and she'd never be troubled by any of them again. Instead she reacted to someone interfering in her fight. "Don't get involved in MY FIGHT!"

Ranma moved fluidly out of the way of the bookbag swing, then lashed out with a backhand that knocked Akane off her feet. "My apologies gentlemen. It appears that she does agree to the terms and conditions you've set. Knock yourselves out."

Akane managed a startled shriek before she was dogpiled by the Sumo Team.

Judge Ranma had just started forward when someone stepped from behind a tree.

"Who dares to dictate terms to the great Tatewaki Kuno? I will not hear of such things."

"Judge Ranma, Megacity One. The lady agrees to your terms, so I'm not interfering."

"MMMMMff!" A muffled might-have-been-a-protest occurred from within the pile of bodies.

One of the hentai had an idea. "Hey, we've all defeated her, therefore we all get to date her, right?"

"MMMMMff!" Again a muffled might-have-been-a-protest occurred from within the pile of bodies.

"I think I do not like the implication that you may set or trifle with my decision," said Tatewaki Kuno, proving that he was indeed a moron who couldn't keep his mouth shut. "I shall have to smite you for your impertinence."

"You're announcing that you intend to assault a law officer with that stick?" Judge Ranma asked calmly.

"Have at thee!"

*BLAM!*

"Idiot," said Judge Ranma. "Bringing a stick to a gunfight."

"You... you killed Kuno?!" One of the Horde looked at the smouldering fallen Kuno and back at the Judge.

"Nah," Ranma assured him. "Used a drug bullet as a warning. Heard there was sexual abuse problems at this school so I loaded one gun with special bullets. He'll be okay in a few days. Won't be able to have kids or be interested in sex but otherwise okay. Chemical castration. Oh well."

The assembled Horde, and even a few not amongst their number, crossed their legs and gave thanks for Akane's temper.

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"Hey, Nabiki," said a familiar voice at lunchtime.

Nabiki froze again, beginning to sweat profusely.

"You'll never guess what this punk said." Ranma gave the boy a shake. "He said you're in the Yakuza. Heh. Can you imagine, with the old men trying to get us engaged? A Judge and a member of the local crime syndicate?"

"Nope," squeaked Nabiki.

"Thought so," agreed Ranma. "Bub. You lying about a nice girl like Nabiki here. What *am* I gonna do with you?"

"Let me go with a warning?" Hikaru Gosunkugi tried hopefully. "Please? I'll throw myself on the mercy of the court?"

"I'm a Judge. Mercy ain't on the court's itinerary." Ranma turned to Nabiki, noting the manic grin and wild eyes. "You okay there? You look a little off."

Nabiki fainted.

Ranma had to let the perp go. Saving a civvie's life was before such a minor crime.