Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction ❯ The Taste of Your Life ❯ Fallen Angel ( Chapter 10 )

Author's note: Wa, wa… Long time no see huh? It's weird… I'm kinda at a lost of word… As if I could not find a thing to tell you guys. I know ^-^ A big thank you and a huge hug to all of you who never stopped reading and /or reviewing this fic. And also another big one to all of you who put up with the long wait I had forced upon you. I'm really sorry but… well, I'm an artist and a very unorganised girl. It always takes me forever to realise that I should write another part and I want you to know that it's not because I don't like to write this. I had so much fun… Sigh… I can't believe it's almost over… How long had it taken me? A year? Two? I know I did take a hell of a time but, you gotta agree with me, the longer it takes, the better ^-^. No honestly, there is only the epilogue left. And it's short. So I don't think it's gonna take that long for me to write it. Please, can someone tell me when it would be two weeks from now (we are September the 29th) that it should be time for me to start writing the last part? Thank you ^-^. Now read and enjoy! You deserve it after all this wait (it seems that I did had a lot to day… he, he, he)

WARNINGS: THE PRESENT FANFICTION IS NOT RECOMENDED FOR CHILDRES. IT CONTAINS MATURE SITUATIONS(although tasteful) AND IS RESERVED FOR MATURE READERS ONLY. THANK YOU.

Disclaimers: I don't own CCS. It belongs to CLAMP. Even though the story plot is great and could be very good for a book, I don't make money out of this. Though I wish I could so I could buy more manga… sigh…. And it is strictly forbidden to take the story away from me or I'll hunt you down even to your dreams!!!! Mwahaaahaaahaaa! (cough… it hurts to laugh like that… wonder how the evil guys do it all the time without catching something… um…)

The Taste of Your Life

By Evil Karyta

Chapter Tenth: Fallen Angel

It had stopped snowing during the day. The white flakes of iced water rested on the soil, still and heavy on the grass that surrounded the buildings. There was no wind flying around to lift the light snowflakes, not even a breath of the Earth as a lone and dark figure strolled down the empty streets. His feet barely touched the ground, leaving light footprints on the snowy road. The air exiting his mouth seemed to stand still in the air, forming the tiniest trace of breath in the humidity of winter's atmosphere. No life outside, humans preferring the warmth of a car at the gripping cold of the outdoors. The moon had a glacial look around it's shaped roundness, face looking deadly in the night, almost accusing the world to be so cold.

Li Syaoran barely felt the biting of the cold or the darkness of the night as he walked toward the home of his love. In his left hand, he held a white rose, beautiful and pure, contrasting with everything he was. It reminded him of her. Although it was the symbol of death, it was also the image of simple love, chaste feelings and innocence. As he approached the building where he knew she was resting, he felt a thug at his heart. A sort of remembrance that he had not yet come to a clear decision, only facing opposing arguments that seemed just as valuable as the other. He stopped in front of the large edifice using as an apartment building. He could not move anymore, his feet refused to keep him walking forward and almost begged him to go back the way he came, leave her alone, let her be a normal human. Torn between two worlds, he sat on the cemented stairs that would lead him to his fate, her fate as well.

Even though he was immune to any kind of humanly sensation when it came to basic experience like hot and cold, he still felt the definite intake of the ice and cold melting snow under him. He glared at the rose, as if the flower could answer all of his throbbing questions, stop this insane spinning that had started inside of him the first time he laid eyes on her. He did now only desired her, he knew that. He loved her deeply and madly, to the point where the connection between his demon and consciousness would break and become two identities. He had lived as a silent shadow, walking through the night for almost five hundred years, killing like Death would and become an anonymous part of what they called the circle of life. Being the first in list when it came to the alimentation chain. It made him snort. This was ridiculous, never before had he doubt anything more than this.

He knew the extent of his love. It was so great, so powerful he could feel it spread through his veins like sweet venom. It was overwhelming, overpowering, and almost as strong as life itself. It surged through him like nothing else had, not even blood or the feeling of the afterglow. It was so real he could burn form it. He smiled, at least one thing was clear in his mind, his feelings were not blinded by bloodlust because if it did, she would already be dead and adding to the growing list of unexplainable death that had cursed the small town. The only thing that was still plaguing him was that he could not find a way out of it. Either she would become on of his and loose all the sweetness she had around her that inspired life and caring, or he would let her go and die from grief or simply go insane with need and die the same.

He fingered the soft petals of the flower he held. The green leaves were contrasting immensely with the whiteness of the shape. As green as her eyes, but not as shiny and living. Even the sun could not competition with her glowing. He started to wonder what she would look like if she were to become a vampire. Would she be cold and still just like the snow covering the ground or would she be delicate and lively like this rose? Was she promised to change completely like many had before, coming from humanists to violent killers? It scared him to think she would loose everything that made her what she was. And there was the fear of the incompatibility of her new personality with his. If she was to become just as cruel as his creator, he had no idea how he would live through that. He hated her. She was his complete opposite. Deadly and cold, not an once of caring in her soul, her eyes were always burning and hateful. The self proclaimed Mistress of Night.

Somehow he doubt it would happen to his beloved Sakura. She was to sweet and caring, not even the dark gift of immortality would make her a monster. Yet he could not resign himself to make her one. On the other hand he craved her presence and wanted her by his side forever. Li growled, his head was hurting. Two sides of himself were fighting against each other and it was paining him. His head started to ache and the world spin a little. He was so lost into his wondering that he never felt the human approaching him. She had came down the stair and opened the glassed door behind him and was now looking at him with questioning eyes. Wondering what he was doing there, sitting on the frozen stairs, looking lost and confused. He heard her suddenly cough, making her presence very clear to him. He cursed himself when he realised that he had been watched when he usually was the one to do it.

She stepped down, her long black hairs falling softly over her back. He recognised her immediately and hoped she would not do the same to him. The girl looked at him, her violet eyes scanning him from head to toes, not noticing any resemblance with the man who had attacked her not so long ago. She smiled kindly and tossed away a lock of dark hair that had fallen out of place. Syaoran kept his gaze low, not daring to look at her in eyes in fear of awaking their pass. He saw her stare at the flower he held, wondering what he would do with that and than thought he was about to meat a girl he loved and had a fight with. She smiled knowingly. This poor man was probably wondering how to tell her he was sorry. She felt as though she had to help him and slowly sat down beside him. He had not drank yet, having barely gotten out of sleep about an hour or two ago and the smell of her blood was quite strong. But he resisted it and let her do as she wanted, only keeping mental distance from her and closing his own mind from her.

"You had a fight with your girlfriend?" she than asked.

"You could put it that way…"

"What happened?" she inquired.

"… I asked her if she wanted to come with me on… a trip… for a very long time… maybe forever…" he struggled with his words not knowing exactly how to express this a more.. mortal way.

"She got angry at you for that?"

"Not angry… she said it was my decision…. That I'm the only one knowing how it is… there…" this was far from easy but he needed to have an other point of view than his.

"An did you made up your mind?"

"I would be with her by the time if I did," quietly answered Syaoran casting his gaze as far from the girl as possible.

"Tell you what? I she didn't want to follow you she would've said no right away. The only thing that you have to think is if you want her to come," she said in a matter of fact manner.

"It's not that simple… that place is hard… and she is so kind…" his head curved down lower.

"If she loves you, she will take all the bad things as a good thing. That's how girls work."

She smiled at him, her white teeth flashing in the dark and got on her feet. She gave him a wink and turned around to go the way she had planned on going this night. Li stood there for a while, watching his breath turning into tiny clouds within the cold air, his mind jiggling with the word of Sakura's friend. It made sense in a way be he still could not come to a conclusion that would satisfy him. Shocking his head, trying to clear his mind, he finally got on his feet and climbed the stairs to enter the building. Inside the temperature was contrasting with the coldness of the winter cold that flew out. He could feel it very clearly. His hand gripped at the rose and he made his ascension to the story where he knew she resided.

He stopped in front of her door, frozen once again, his body refusing to obey his brain. He was rebelling against himself. This was completely insane. He loved her, she deserved to know that at least. He could not simply leave without a word after taking so much from her. If he was to let her live, she had the right to know the reasons and if he was to take her, she also had to know the consequences before the act, leaving her all the time she needed to say no. But in his mind, the only scenario that felt right was the one where he would tell her that he loved her that that was why he had to go and never come back into her life again. A dread feeling of depression engulfed him as he got back the control over his members and knocked at the wooden door. His breath caught in his throat as he waited for the replay, for his angel to appear on the other side of the door, unlock it and open it.

There was a flash of green that stroked him to his soul. It was like the light of day without it's deadly consequences. How could he let her know, how could he make his choice? This was torture, to see this perfect creature, reflection of the angel, almost like a saint to his eyes, his opposite in everything and yet his completing half. His soul mate, the One like his kind would say, such a meaningless name for such an overpowering feeling, gripping at his soul, tearing him in two. It only occurred to him at that moment that she was it, that she was the only thing he had been looking for all of his life and she was standing there, looking at him with her intense eyes, glowing in the night. He had thought of telling her something, asking her if she would reconsider her offer of choosing her destiny. And now, all he could think about was kissing her deeply as if tomorrow would be the final line, as if he would give away his last breath when sleep would come to him before the sunrise.

"Syaoran…"

It was soft and sweet, as all she did. Her eyes seemed to widen a bit, as if she did not expected him to show this soon. What was he supposed to do, stay in the dark and wait for the answer to come by itself, as if it was whispered by the spirit roaming the land in seek for wanderers who felt just as lost as him. He would never have such luck. Than a smile appeared on her lovely face, miracle of life, a ray of light in his darkness. He sighed, their was no way out of this, he was forced to make a decision and dreaded the consequences and yet was eager to make one only to be able to put it back together again. Li gave her a half smile as he always did and she motioned him to come inside.

"I… I don't know if I should…" he murmured.

"Why not?"

At this he smiled fully, so childish and innocent. She would awake all the sinful desires of his soul and yet say something just as adorable and sweet as this. An enigma to his life adding to the mysteries of existence. He shook his head and gave into her warm invitation. She stepped aside, giving him enough space to come into the apartment, much wider than his own. Since he became what he was, he always preferred living into small home, getting away from everything that could remind him of his past and rank in society. Sakura closed the door behind him and took his coat off of him before leading him into the living room. She took place on the couch, beside a yellow fur ball the size of pillow. Was that thing a cat? The head turn in his direction and the golden eyes of the feline narrowed at him, its tiny nose wrinkled, smelling the odour of death in the house. It outbreed something that would come close to a roar but as soon as its eyes came in contact with Syaoran's, it became silent and pensive before turning its head carelessly from him.

She watched him as he started to pace the space in the room, not finding words of peace in her comforting surrounding. Thoughts seemed to come in war inside his head, not coming to terms at all with his profound thinking, even after a night and a day of pondering. He stopped by the window and gave her a side look from behind his shoulder. She was all dressed up, ready to go to work. What day were they? In the middle of the week? The beginning? He was not even aware of the time flow anymore. His world only circling around the lively creature that was Sakura. His gaze returned to the outdoors, watching the shimmering of the snow as the streetlights would bath the icy crystals, becoming thousands of microscopic stares laying still on the frozen grown.

"You have to work tonight?" he simply asked, not having a clue as just how to aboard the subject of her change… or his departure.

"It depends… maybe I won't need to…"

He looked back at her, startled. She was patting the cat lovingly. He could hear the miniature of a beast purring softly, getting lost into her affectionate caresses. So she would accept any outcome, just like the girl had told him. Is she asked him to choose, it was only because she already agreed with it, only wanted him to be sure of what he was doing. But still, this was not helping him. There was still so much uncertainties left surrounding this problem. He walked to her and kneeled in front of her, like a knight before a princess, only this was far from a fairy tale, or if it were it would have been the darkest of one. He took her free hand and kissed it gently, closing his eyes as pain torn his heart apart with the mere thought of hurting her.

"Sakura… I'm lost. I don't know what to do. For the first time in my life, I just feel as if there is no way out. I'm trapped…" he whispered, resting his forehead on her laps.

She let her long fingers get lost in the wildness of his hairs, giving him a feeling close to comfort and as full as her love. He sighed, the rose was still in his other hand, its soft petals grazing the floor, almost forgotten. Sakura smiled to herself, she had made up her mind the second he had asked her, only she wanted for him to know the outcome of it and know that he was not feeling as if he was forced to do it. Surly, he must have told someone before, or an other mortal must have found out his deadly secret and pleaded him to be granted immortality. She, like all humans did found the thought appealing thought she would never ask for it, only accept it if it would come. How could she prove him that whatever his mind would come out with, she would bent to it with understanding and love.

A second hand came over his head and forced him to look up. His luminous eyes meat the pure gems of Sakura as she smiled softly at him. A finger crossed the path of his forehead, circling down his face to his cheek and stroked his bottom lip. It was soft, it was warm, and he felt so cold, so callous. Her face shown in compassion and love, so pure and sincere, he thought he would burn from her gaze. He was a sinner looking at a angel, touching her with he blood stained hands, shame rolled bitterly inside him util her lips touched his and swallowed parts of his pain. She was forgiving, she was loving, she was everything and she was his. She parted from him and looking at him, into his bottomless spinning soul, eyes reflecting the complexity of his mind and spirit, a being trapped in time, and she loved him, and he was hers.

"Just let it come as it must, Syaoran. It will only pain you to think over it more and more. I'm sorry I've asked you to choose my destiny when it is mine to take."

With that she helped him to his feet and led him to her room, closing the door behind her, she got him to sit on the bed. She shut the curtains and turn to face him. Li looked at her in pure amazement, seeing her body ever so perfect in the dark as if it was in the light of the day. By the God, how much did he love that woman. She was his all, she was his life. He realised that he could not carry on without her. Did she felt the same? She smiled at him; her eyes seemed to hold a secret she was the only to possess. Twins emeralds shining in the dark, a sight he would never grow tired of.

She walked slowly to him, shredding off her clothes as she came closer and closer to his reach and all Syaoran could do was watching her doing so. Each article flying softly to the ground, her beautiful body filling his mind and eyes. With each step, there was a flash a skin that appeared to his appreciative gaze and when she reached him, she was only clad in her underwear, and her bra was drifting to the floor. He did not dare to tough her just yet, feeling the guilt of his pass gripping at him although he died to feel her body. She smiled at him and sat on his laps. Her hands roamed from his head, always gentle and soft, descending slowly toward his shoulders, following the path of his arms toward his hands. Her right hand reached his left and felt the flower he had been caring with him. Her sight fell on it and her smile became even sweeter.

"Is it for me?" she asked innocently.

He nodded. Who else would deserve his presents but her. She kissed his cheek and took the rose in her hand and rose it so she could see it entirely. The silky whiteness of the petals shown in her eyes, making them livelier, holding a part of the real summer that went along with the colour of her pools. She passed the soft edge of the rose over her lips, as if she was kissing it and then put it on the table beside her bed before kissing him plainly with all the passion she held inside her. At first, he found himself wondering if he could give in, if he had the right to but when her velvety tongue lapped at his lips, asking for entrance, he let it all out, his arms circling her tiny body, almost crushing her to him. He felt the need building inside, so hot and powerful, how could he deny it? Desire was something he always had so much trouble containing deep inside. But this time, this time he had something holding him back even if his body was pushing him forward. He broke the kiss, staring deep into her eyes.

"I don't think it's safe…"

She looked at him puzzled. What did he mean by that? They had made love before and nothing happen, she could not see the danger though he did. There was something inside him that was starting to build and it was not entirely based on lust. He could feel it, it was not very strong but if he did nothing about it as soon as possible the consequences would be too much to bear. Sakura stared at him for some time, she did not understand. His hands were still on her, holding her to him as if she was the most precious thing in the world.

"What's wrong…?"

"I… I did not feed…" he looked away, his eyes, even though the were shining on their own seemed to get lost into the darkness.

"It's ok, I'm not scared. I trust you…"

His gaze returned to her, they were soft and passionate, hungry for her and all she could give, even more. She trusted him? A bloodthirsty animal, living his life through death, surviving through blood. Was this even possible? But she kissed him, plainly, almost devouring him, starting a war within himself, torn between pure hunger and love. Oh God, how much he needed her. And soon everything was a haze, lost into the moment, swirling around like a reflection of oneself into pure water that had just been stepped on. Syaoran turned them around, pushing her to the mattress, kissing her in more ways than one, letting his lips travel over her perfect curves, reaching to the perfumed skin as smooth and sweet as a fruit could be.

She sighed in satisfaction, letting him do as he pleased with her, wanting him to get everything he wanted from her. His shirt went flown away in the blur. Her hand could feel the silky smooth flesh, a tiny bit colder than supposed. Their minds were lost into the depth of passion, insane with need and desire. His lips were everywhere, driving her mad, making her react to every light stroke of his soft and gentle hands. She was kissing his neck as he smelled the sweetness of her hairs but soon he was out of reach as he descended toward her chest, loving the taste of her breast, the feel of them under his hands and lips as she gave into his hungry touch.

Pleasure roamed over her, filling her nerves and making her wild. Her sent was filling his nose, enhancing his own reactions. To him, Sakura had become more than just his lover, she was his all, she was his satisfaction, the only way for him to get rid of something inside, plaguing him with guilt that she would somehow erase with her pleading cries of ecstasy. Was this even possible, he was not sure but he had no way to stop now, too lost into his feelings, taking and giving all in the same time. He went lower, leaving a path of hot kisses down her body, going straight to the core of her love, devouring her like the sweetest dish. As mush as he wanted to slow down, he found himself unable to do so, his need far overpowering his will and the sound of her moans dancing in the room before resting into his ears was too beautiful to make him stop. He wanted more, needed more.

Her fingers drove into his hairs, pushing him closer to her centre her, and it was at that moment that he realised that everything was happening to fast. He took a deep breath, taking in her wonderful sent and slowed his pace. Her cries got softer, more erotic if he could say it that way. As he gain more and more self control, he moved his eyes to stare at her as she moved her head from right to left along with the music he was creating in her. Her hairs spread all around her on the white pillow, her eyes closed in ecstasy. He could see her biting her bottom lip, trying to find the control that was slipping away from her as he built her pike inside of her. He loved to see her like this, a sight far more inspiring than the look of fear that his victims would give him. It was like a poetry in motion, he was the line and she was the words. Beautiful words filled with care, innocence and love, but just as wild and exotic as she was when he would touch her like this.

He could see that she was closing the edge, just like he could hear her begging him to take her though she was unable to voice it. The rest of his clothes disappeared and he was now covering her body with his. Li's eyes shown in a different glitter as he peered into her soul, as always waiting for her acceptance. The colour mesmerised her, from the usual golden amber, they had switched to a lively reddish brown, flashing in the night, two incandescent orbs, filled with love and desire for her only. She kissed him, her own green eyes never leaving his, speaking acceptance louder than words could. But their was still something restraining him, keeping him from taking her fully. Like a binder to their fulfilment, a fright over something he knew he would not control and yet he could not tell what it was.

Kissing her deeply, he shoved the thought away and trusted into her, opening the doors to heaven, the closer he could get to eternal bliss. Sakura arched her back, giving him full access over her body, getting lost into the feeling, letting the burning passion overwhelm her soul and mind, becoming one with him. He moved at the rate of her hart, hearing the delicate sound of her life more intensively than ever. Her legs warped around his waist, her hands pressed into his back as his explored her body, squeezing her breasts, toying with her nipples, feeling the smoothness of her soft flesh. And soon, everything became lost into some kind of fog, only the feeling was left around them, strong, overwhelming, infiltrating inside them by each holes it could find. The pressure she would exert around his hardness, the gentle caresses of her long fingers as they stroked his skin, the sound of her enjoyment getting lost into his ears. And that sweet flavour that flown into his mouth…

Yes, so sweet, tasteful, innocent, and pure. He could feel the velvety texture flowing slowly inside him from his mouth to his throat, giving him far more pleasure than he ever felt. Syaoran hear her cry her fulfilment, knowing she had reached her pike that he had carefully build for her, the sound was so good to him, a music of love, far more beautiful than every melody of life. He knew he was near too. The grip of her centre getting stronger, forcing him to give in and reach the sky with her. This adding to that warm, velvety taste that was flooding his mouth, warming him from the inside was all he needed to join her. And he fell into one of the most blissful moment he had ever shared with her, roaming the heavens like two fugitives escaping from earth for barely a moment, just enough to experience true happiness and going back dawn to share the experience.

But as the afterglow fade, the taste did not, becoming even stronger, even more precise. His surrounding came back to him, the bed, the walls, his face nested in her neck and this hot liquid filling his mouth with its lively feeling, so much like life… so much like blood… so much like… BLOOD? With a start, he pushed away from Sakura, his eyes taking in the horror of her body laying still on the sheets as a small ringlet of crimson slipped slowly out of the tiny twin holes that had pierced her throat. He stared at her, his beloved marked with the kiss of death, a sweet smile adorning her angelic face. What had he done?

He cradled her body into his arms, feeling the tears coming to his eyes. He had done it, he had killed the only one he had truly loved, his angle, his meaning of life. He caressed her hairs, feeling their silkiness spreading around his fingers. He buried his face into her chest, barely holding back the sobs that would soon overtake his body. No more shall her hear her voice, her sweet caring thoughts would be forever lost in eternity, joining the heavens they had sneaked upon not so long ago. A crystalline tear fell from his calming eyes, slowly sliding down his cheek to finish its descent on her flesh with a moan from her. A moan? His eyes opened with a flash and he stared at her. Her lids were half-close and he could see death getting ready to snatch her lovely soul from his world inside her fading pools. No, he would not allow it, never would he let the ugly face of death get a look of her.

Li gently laid her back on the bed, his face calm almost deadly. He caressed her face, pushing a lock of hair away from her pale face rising his other hand to his lips. He closed his eyes and bit himself, tearing apart his own flesh and filling the blood oozing out of the wound and into his mouth. He kissed her softly, looking one last time at her face the way it was now, forever holding the present image of the sweet Sakura, his lost angle.

"Please forgive me…" he whispered before pushing his injured wrist to her lips. "Drink… please drink it and come back to me… I love you Sakura…. Don't leave me…"

As the first drop of blood touched her lips, a glitter of life returned to her as she started to suck the sweet liquid out of him. If she was feeling pleasure out of it, all Li could feel was a torturing pain gripping at his guts as if she was sucking his bones out of him. Her hands came around his arm, circling him and holding him in place so she could get more of the sweet tasting fluid. If only she knew… It was almost unbearable but for her, he was ready to sacrifice everything, even his life if she asked for it. As she drank more and more, he had more trouble swallowing his cries. It felt like a thousand knives were cutting through his flesh, tearing him apart from his body to his soul. After some times, he knew that she had enough and retried his wrist from her vice like grip.

Her eyes opened, showing him a flash of lively green shining like real emeralds, two gems of life shimmering in the dark with an unreal flash. The green started to mix with other colours, taking in all the shades of the colour pallet, turning from green to blue to suddenly change to flashing red. She stared at him for a moment before her eyes completely mixed into their final colouring, a beautiful shade of silvery green and golden hue. Sakura smiled at him, showing two birthing fags, white, sharp and deadly, before she closed her eyes and gave into the first sleep. Syaoran stared at her still body, his own completely frozen.

"Please forgive me, my love…"

Outside, life was slowly returning to the sleeping city as the cold moon slowly left the sky to the pale winter sun. A freezing wind blew through the streets, gripping harshly at each leaving creature as if taking revenge over the death of someone or something precious. And it seemed to many that the wind was whispering a complain, mourning the lost of a life. Not a day in any of the citizen's life had ever felt as sorrowful and lonely as this one. Life was now grieving over the lost of their sweet touch, the Sakura flower had just dropped from the tree of life, never to return for them to see…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

To be continued… … …

a/n: So… What do you think? Was this the end you were thinking of? I'm sorry for those who asked me not to turn Sakura-chan into a vampire. It was already planned that way and I liked it like that, so just bare with me ^-^. Anyway, I want your appreciation on it, even if you didn't like it. I did but a lot of work on it. Cause right now it's 3:30 am and I'm still up. It's always like that when I finish a chapter… can't stop writing until I'm done with it. Problem is that it gets full of mistakes cause I'm much more tired and I can't see where the mistakes are… my fisions gets all misty and all… sigh.. I'll go to bed now. And please, don't forget to review. Oh and for those of you who were wondering. All the reviews you had written to me are still existing. I made a copy of it. Yup, all the 400 reviews. By the way, big thanks. I hope I'll hit the 500 before the end. I'll tell you everything on the last chapter ^-^. See yah!