Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction ❯ Unwilling Sleep ❯ Chapter 1

Title: Sleep

Author: Shadow/Phantomness

Rating: NC-17

Plotbunny: Yue needs moon magic, and Syaoran's the only one who has it now that Touya's given his up…

Pairings: Mentioned S+S and possibly one-sided Yue x Syaoran. Manipulative! Yue, past Clow x Yue, Yukito x Touya

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS, because if I did, it'd probably be `Card Captor Syaoran' instead…

 

Yue looked at the sleeping boy with a sigh. There was no other choice. He could not tell his Mistress this secret, as she had no idea how it could be achieved. Touya - well, Yukito might like him, but Yue felt differently…

He could see the layers of deception around the black-haired teen… he could see the lies that were hidden, he could see that what looked like truth was not truth. He had had too much experience with Clow not to see these things…

Syaoran stirred uneasily in his sleep. Yue laughed softly. No matter what, the moon bond of magic between them was still very strong. If it had not been for Syaoran's self-control and his belief in Yue's words that he did not love him, they would have been together long ago…

He was taking blatant advantage of the situation, but Clow's descendant had come to Tomoeda for a few weeks on summer vacation, and Clow only knew if he would come back again, and he probably would not until his training was finished, and even then, Sakura would be around so now was really the best time.

He knelt down next to the bed and carefully retracted his wings. They would get in the way later…

Now, for the part that Sakura would not approve of….

 

The kisses were soft, but the boy did not wake, not even when his clothing was eased off and removed piece by piece, not even when cold fingers trailed over his pale skin and teased and touched and claimed what was no one's, not when slick fluid covered his front and he came in brutal release, not when Yue spread his legs and claimed him…

Syaoran woke up the next day feeling satiated, happy, and oddly sore as well…

 

“What did you do, Yue…?”

Yue didn't answer. Cerberus fixed beady eyes on Syaoran and glared at Yue again. “You didn't!”

“I did.”

“I knew it! Your magic is more stable than it should be...!”

Syaoran was blissfully unaware of their argument over him and smiled at Sakura, who smiled back.

“He doesn't know, does he?”

“Should he?” Yue asked. “It won't hurt him.”

“…”

“I guess not, but still…”

“Still what, Cerberus. Surely the Mistress would not understand.”

“We're keeping her in the dark again.”

“It will not affect her happiness…”

“What if he doesn't come back?”

“I'll find him.” Yue said matter-of-factly. “And Dream will help me…”

“… This is…”

“My last chance, Cerberus. I have no other choice!”
“No,” The winged lion agreed sadly, “You don't…”

“Would you prefer it if I died, Cerberus?” Yue asked, his tone odd. “Would you?”

“What? Of course not! But I just don't think it's fair to him…”

Yue shrugged. Survival? Desperate times called for desperate measures after all…

And it was nothing personal, not really. Syaoran was the only one around here who was magic-compatible, and Kaho would have been able to tell, so really, it was the safest way…

 

He dreamed of an angel with cold eyes, an angel of ice… and he woke up crying.

Syaoran didn't cry. Li Syaoran did not cry. But no matter what, he felt like there was an aching hole inside his heart that not even Sakura's love could cover. Impossible.

He did love Sakura! He did!

So why did he feel so empty?

 

It was torture. He woke up every morning with longing and there was no way to dispel it. It did not affect his magic or his martial arts, simply his mood…

Why did he feel so depressed? He had just left Sakura, so it could not be that. They still wrote to each other every week… and he had no reason to suspect her of being unfaithful.

So why did he feel so… empty?

 

He was walking down the street when he bumped into someone and quickly helped him up without looking. “Sorry.” He said gruffly, prepared to take off again.

“Li-kun!”
He froze. That was Yukito's voice. He turned around fully and met the sight of the silver-haired teen, smiling at him. “Yukito-san!” Pale pink flamed on his cheeks, as he blushed, trying to ignore the rush of blood.

What was wrong? He wasn't attracted to Yukito-san any more, and surely he had enough magic to resist…?

However, some things were easier said than done, and this was one of them. He could feel himself starting to shake, and Yukito seemed to notice it as well.

 

“Li-kun, are you all right? You look like you've seen a ghost!”

Syaoran choked and tried to stammer out a reply, but his vocal cords had cut their contract ties and gone on permanent vacation. He settled for grabbing Yukito's hand, but that only seemed to send a cascade of lightning through both of them.

Yukito actually fell to his knees from the assault, Syaoran barely in better shape… the lightning had faded away to be replaced by splinters of ice, and he could feel them driving into his skin with the pounding of a thousand drums…

There was a brilliant flare of white energy and it was not Yukito who held him any more, but Yue, and if anything, his presence just seemed to make the situation worse… he caught a glimpse of shocked faces before there was a brilliant flash of blue light and they vanished.

 

His hands were shaking even as his fingers dug into the moon guardian's shoulders, searching, seeking… for what?

“Yue…”

“Shh, Clow's descendent, what's wrong?” The voice asked; smooth and glistening like molten silver. He clutched the guardian desperately, trying to visualize solid earth beneath his feet, instead of the roiling sea he seemed to have reappeared in. Some part of his mind idly noted that it was cold, but that was all.

Before he could got a word out edgewise, a cool mouth had closed down over his own and Syaoran gave an involuntarily moan, mind registering that what he was pushed back onto was soft. A bed then…

For all his inattention, it could have been dirt floor for all he cared. Yue wasn't gentle, the normally collected guardian had a look of pure desperation in his eyes and it hurt so much that Syaoran nearly passed out the first time, but somehow that made it easier and by the time his mind finally caught up with what they were doing, Yue was very, very gentle with him and there wasn't any blood, so it was all right.

At least, that's what he told himself when the shock faded away.

 

All right, so he was flushed with shame and he knew it hadn't been Sakura he'd been thinking about during the experience and he really, really ought to get an explanation out of Yue but he just felt so tired…

The moon guardian didn't say a word, since he was already fast asleep, and sleep sounded like such a good idea that Syaoran took it.

 

Yue was already gone when he awoke, or at least that was what he thought, until he realized that he was dressed in white silk pajamas and clean and that there was tea and biscuits waiting on the table. Syaoran eyed the porcelain cups suspiciously, but they didn't move, so he felt safe enough to drink it.

It was chrysanthemum tea, with a hint of honey. Interesting…

He wasn't famished, but he took two of the biscuits and finished them before Yue returned. The guardian didn't look surprised to see him up.

Syaoran wondered idly how Yue had changed clothing then shrugged. It wasn't important, although considering the fact that Yue was wearing jeans and nothing else, of all things, was. He tore his eyes away, but he didn't think he was quick enough.

Silver eyes regarded him with a touch of amusement. “I see you're awake.”

 

“Yue, what did you do to me? I mean, what did we just do?” That damned blush was coming back, but it didn't make sense! Yue wasn't Yukito!

Except that he was, since Yukito only existed as his false form, and could technically leave at any time.

“Will you stop acting so flustered?” Yue asked sharply. “Head of the Li Clan indeed.”

Syaoran clamped his mouth shut and glared back. Yue seemed rather immune to it, as he poured himself tea and sat down as well. The jeans really did look incongruous with his huge feathery white wings.

“What did you do to me?”

“I did nothing.” The moon guardian smirked. “Like magic attracts like magic. Didn't I tell you that you were only attracted to Yukito's magic?”

“Yes, but I love Sakura! I do!”

“No doubt about that, considering your actions,” Yue said, after a sip, “However, the attraction doesn't simply go away, especially since we are… connected through Sakura. It simply grows stronger and stronger as you grow older…”

“WHAT?!”

“Well, I could hardly bed you when you were ten, could I?” Yue said conversationally, as if they were discussing some nice normal mundane topic and not Syaoran's sex life. He wasn't sure whether he should be furiously angry or mortified but he couldn't exactly do both at once so he settled for a sullen scowl.

“And somehow I get the feeling you're not trying to resist.”

“I have no intention of dying, Clow's descendent, and I doubt very much you'd like to be in excruciating pain for the rest of your life.”

That gave him pause, and he blinked. “What?”

“Touya's magic ran out months ago, the worthless fool.” Yue said, disdain clearly dripping from each syllable that rather surprised Syaoran, he'd thought that since Yukito and Touya were together surely Yue would…

“Wait… then the reason why…”

“Yes.” A small smirk. “I would not betray my mistress for anything less than a desperate matter.”

“... Couldn't you have asked me first?” He knew he sounded plaintive, but that didn't help much.

 

“Would you have agreed, even given the circumstances?”

Honestly, the thought of cheating on Sakura, even for this… “No…” He answered with a bit of tremor in his voice.

“Then you see why I did what I did.”

“It doesn't mean I'll have to like it! What will I tell Sakura?”

“You won't. You don't need to.” Something glinted in the moon guardian's eyes, but vanished before anything else appeared - Syaoran certainly had no time to analyze it. The card that Yue was now holding looked familiar, though…

“Erase… you're going to erase my memories?”

“If you wish. I trust you do not wish to compromise your relationship with my dear Mistress.” Yue's voice had slid towards jagged ice again, radiating chill…

 

“Why, Yue? I thought you liked Sakura.”

Yue shook his head. “She is innocent and a child, even now. She still has no power to support me and I doubt she ever will. Clow lied to me…. It's been almost five years, and there has been no change… if I had not done what I had done… my dear Mistress would be one guardian short…”

He had loved Clow, but Clow had lied about his death, lied about the new Master, lied about… this.

He couldn't trust Clow's promises any longer. He had to forge his own path before winter ended and spring sapped him of his remaining strength.

 

“I…I don't understand.”

“Pity. I thought you would.” Yue traced the curve of his cheek and Syaoran flushed, feeling himself hardening. “Stop it! It's not like I want this!”

“Oh, I think you want this very much, Clow's descendant…” Yue purred. “You wouldn't let me die, would you?”

Syaoran swung between guilty desire and his love for Sakura. Yue subtly nudged the guilt button a bit further along.

“I…” He started as Yue pulled him into an embrace, wishing his body would quit getting so aroused. This was not what he wanted, really, but…

What if Yue died? Sakura would be inconsolable, and if he could help…

 

A husky whisper in his ear, even as his pajama top was raised, exposing his skin to cool air and probing fingers that curled around little nubs and stroked with sharp nails… an involuntary moan escaped his lips and he pressed more firmly against that body, gasping as sharp fangs ghosted over his throat….

Yue was all sharp angles and there was pain as his nails cut lines of red in Syaoran's shoulders, but Syaoran endured it, even as he was probed and examined and finally taken…

That was the excuse he gave himself later, sore and reddened.

“Does Yukito know?” He finally asked.

Yue gave him a look that made him want to sink into the floor. “No. He's still rather too trusting, and in any case, Touya's always the one pounding him into the mattress.” He stated coldly.

“… But I thought… you and Touya…”

Yue smiled, not a nice smile. “All I promised was that I'd protect Sakura. I did. I still do. And I can hardly do that if I'm not here, can I?” He leaned closer to where Syaoran was sitting on the edge of the bed with his legs dangling off.

Although, Syaoran had to admit, Yue was beautiful, pale skin and the curve of his wings - magnificent, and the feathers had felt nice against his bare skin - ah! Bad thoughts! He loved Sakura! He did!

He did… but if he did, then why was he still attracted to Yue? It just wasn't fair…

 

“You seem disturbed.” Yue's voice cut into his thoughts. “Oh my. Can it be that the truth has finally come through?”

“Stop it!”

“Stop what? I am not doing anything,” Yue said, though the card he now held - where did they keep coming from, Syaoran wondered, was marked Libra. The truth card… the card Sakura never used…

 

“Now,” Yue said, as the scales appeared in his hands, “I believe we should clarify our relationship, don't you think?”

“What relationship! For all I know you just like…” Syaoran choked and couldn't get the curse words out of his mouth.

“Screwing you?” Yue supplied, as Syaoran turned tomato red. “Certainly a possibility. However, Libra isn't tipping.” Syaoran watched as the scales floated to the center of the room, hovering in midair. They were annoyingly still.

“Then what do you want with me?” Syaoran burst out.

“Well…” Yue said, thoughtfully almost, “I won't deny that you are a beautiful child… and my Mistress is quite lucky, with such a catch…”

Syaoran glowered, but he couldn't suppress the hot flash of… something. “I… I'll tell her about this! You won't get away with it!”

“Well then, she'll run off to the Daidouji girl then.” Yue said, madly calm. Libra seemed to nod in acknowledgement.

“What?! Sakura wouldn't - with Tomoyo? That's crazy!”

“I wouldn't be so sure…. And you don't sound so certain, do you?”

Syaoran growled. “I don't like you.”

“It seems that you feel otherwise.” Yue eyed the scales and re-settled his wings. “Quite a pity…”

“Fine! I liked the sex, it felt pretty good, all right?” Syaoran choked out.

Yue smirked. “You're omitting something. What is it?”

“I don't have any feelings for you, I know I had a crush on Yukito but we were only attracted because of our magic types! That's all!”

“So you say…” Yue said, unconcerned as he tucked Libra back away…somewhere. “Well, I suppose if that's the way you want to play the game… you may leave.”

Syaoran scowled. “How long until your magic runs out?” He bit out.

Yue hid a smile in return. “Two weeks, three if I'm careful.”

“Fine. I'll be expecting you.” The words stuck in his throat, but Yue got the intent, and he made a mock-bow before he just… left.

Syaoran wondered why he felt so alone, bashed the thought on the head, and tried to ignore the burning ache in his cock.

Two weeks…

Was it wrong of him to look forwards to it?

 

End Fic

Completed 10/29/05

Poor Syaoran. He's so conflicted, and Yue really isn't helping matters *waggles eyebrows*