Crossover Fan Fiction / Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction / Tenchi Muyo Fan Fiction ❯ Reason And Accountability ❯ Isekais ( Chapter 36 )

THIRTY-SIX

Unfamiliar ceiling. Yes, that is what it is. Unfamiliar. I found myself in a dormitory, probably of a modern Japanese school. I found a mirror and stared. The body I was occupying was Chibi. I looked like a chibi doll. And I also recognized myself. Subaru. From Re:Zero. The man who died over and over again, in order to be forced by an ROB into connecting with other people, to stop being fake. This… is so perfect.

I dressed in a track suit, which is apparently his only clothing and found there were two adorable girls and another little-sister type rooming with me. The girls were identical twins, with a horn in their head, one red, one blue. Oni, from the fairy tale. They were very cute. They were also grumpy in the morning. It reminded me of Komachi.

“I need coffee.” I headed out, of the room, following my nose down the stairs to a cafeteria, where three groups of differently dressed chibi people were eating their breakfasts. I grabbed a tray with a Japanese breakfast and a cup of strong coffee. I bumped elbows with a tiny blonde girl with a military officers cap on, and an iron cross.

“Morning,” I offered. “Is this coffee any good?”

“Very. I insist. I can’t stand anything less,” she said, in the very familiar voice of my adorable little sister. I put down my tray and kneeled down to stare her in a face. Blue eyes, giant ahoge.

“Komachi, is that you?” I asked her.

“Nii nii?” she asked in confusion.

I hugged her. There were some shouts of outrage from several tables, and indifference from another. The little ogresses stood close, glaring at us. They had arrived in time to see this surprise.

“Sorry. I tend to play through. Anybody need healing?” I offered. Shrugs. I cast it on my sister and fixed a bunch of issues with her pituitary gland and her ovaries and TSH levels in her thyroid. “You’ve had a lot of malnutrition in this body, neesan. Have some cake, and eat some sausage with your breakfast. You need the protein and fats.”

“Its weird to see you in doctor mode. Weirder to see you in someone else’s body. Natsuki Subaru is kind of a jerk,” she explained. The ogresses looked mad at this. So did the goth loli.

“Anybody else?” I asked.

“My men already healed from their last battle. I think the skinny girl with the big hat and the fake eye patch by the dumb looking guy over there could use some healing. Don’t mind the blue haired girl. She’s a goddess, but she’s really dumb, and really unlucky.

“We should eat breakfast together. It feels like I hardly see you anymore.”

“Waking up to a different person in your body is weird. Some of them are girls. I’ve gotten used to the screams of surprise when they realize their tits are gone and then grab your boy parts.”

“Really? I guess that’s fair. Let’s eat. Introduce me to your soldiers.”

“Colonel?”

“Today only, the ghost of my brother is possessing the body of Natsuki Subaru. Tomorrow he’ll be gone again.”

“I am sorry for your loss,” offered one of the men. He turned to me. “Herr Degurechaff, which brings you from the afterlife?”

“Eh. Complicated. Not dead, also. Have you heard of reincarnation? Turns out it is true. Also, Gods, plural.”

“What?” asked the confused soldiers.

“Don’t worry about it. The important thing is that when Tanya is home, she’s my cute little sister.”

“So no bayonetting people or flying gunfights and shooting down heavy bombers at 8500 meters?” asked the girl whose voice sounded just like Yukinoshita. The younger one, not Haruno.

“Not when she’s at home. At home she’s in Middle School and dating a nice boy named Taishi.”

“Hachiman! That’s the first time you’ve said something nice about Taishi.”

“Eh. His sister Saki is kind of cute. Did you know she freaks out in haunted houses? She sprinted out of the haunted mansion in Kyoto,” I laughed.

“Aww. I could totally see her doing that,” grinned Komachi, a much gentler expression than her face usually used.

“So are you really a battle junkie?” I asked her.

“I would say that Being X upsets my temper,” Tanya/Komachi corrected me.

“I wonder if that’s a demon, a fallen angel, or one of the monsters you fought in another reality. I mean, there’s a goddess sitting right over there,” I said, pointing at the bluenette doing fountain tricks out of her fans for the attention of… nobody actually. She liked attention, obviously.

“Who her?” asked one of the men.

“Yeah. She’s good at healing too. And dispelling undead. Removing curses.”

“Are she and that guy together-together?” asked one of the corporals. I didn’t bother to catch his name, even though it was written on his pocket. I’m lazy sometimes.

“Not the way you’re thinking, but they can’t be separated either. She’s required to stick by him until they can defeat the Demon Lord,” I explained. “They haven’t left the starter town, but managed to defeat two of his generals already, though one of them is your teacher. He didn’t stay dead. Immortality is a bitch like that,” I explained. Tanya swatted me.

“Language!” she objected.

“Sorry.”

“You really are siblings. Are you squinting? It really isn’t that bright in here,” asked the corporal.

“Eh? Oh. Interesting. You are squinting niisan. C’mon. Get your people and let’s go to class. They lecture us on boring things like ethics and the quadratic equation.”

“I thought you were good at ethics?” I reminded Komachi.

“Sure. I’m good at other people using ethics, and minding the letter of the law,” she replied grimly. I hugged my sister.

“If you want to talk about it when we’re both back home, I’ll be there for you,” I promised.

The rest of the day was pointless, though the skeleton was pretty funny and liked knock-knock jokes, and the adventurer was lots of fun to tease. I wondered if I’d be visiting him in the future. Seems likely. I had lunch with Komachi and my own team of cute murder-girls, and hugged the one that was crushing on this body, which apparently didn’t happen enough. The memories of the body informed me that the other sister would murder me if I wasn’t very sweet to the girl. Afternoon classes were so boring I fell asleep.