CSI - Series Fan Fiction ❯ Most Embarrassing Sex ❯ One-Shot

Disclaimer: The characters of CSI: Miami are the property of CBS Broadcasting Inc and Alliance-Atlantis Communications. No copyright infringement is intended.

Warning: Language, HOMSEXUAL SCENES!! Male/Male SEXWarning to all my usual readers that this is the first time I'm writing a heterosexual scene! Thankfully, it's not much, but it's still remotely graphic!

Jodine16: I've been working on this for a while now and some input that I got from my sister really helped spice this up. Enjoy!

Most Embarrassing Sex

“Okay, okay, I got something,” Calleigh said, giggling. Ryan had had a small get-together at his place on Saturday with the team, including Alexx and Tripp. Alexx left a few hours after the barbeque finished to get her kids in bed and Tripp followed soon after. At the moment, the CSIs were sitting in his living room, drinks in hand, chatting about ridiculous things they did back in their college days. “Your most embarrassing time of sex. Ryan, you go first.”

“Well, I was 22 and my friend, Derrick, and I just got home from a drinking contest at a party we went to, so we were totally pissed out of our trees. So we were watching TV and one thing led to another…”

Flashback

Ryan moaned against Derrick's lips as fingers tugged and pulled his t-shirt off. They drunkenly stumbled and banged into the walls as the made their way to Derrick's room. As soon as they finally reached the dark-skinned man's room, the two men were as naked as the day they were born. He snickered when Derrick pounced on him and they fell onto the bed. “Fuck, Derrick,” Ryan breathed, when his erection was gripped and stroked.

 

“How do you wanna do this?” Derrick slurred, his hand moving up and down Ryan's cock at uneven paces.

Ryan grinned and pulled Derrick's hands off him. He flipped onto his stomach and thrust his ass out invitingly. “Doggie style,” Ryan said, looking over his shoulder.

“I like the way you think, Wolfe,” Derrick grinned. He leaned forward and bit at Ryan's neck, while he reached in the general direction of his nightstand. Derrick cursed against Ryan's pale skin when things fell off the top. He grinned in triumph when he gripped a bottle of lube. Setting it within arm's reach, he looked for condoms and pulled one out of the bottom drawer.

Ryan spread his legs more when Derrick ran his hands over his white behind. The dark-haired man sucked on Ryan's shoulder, popping the cap on the tube and squirted the cool liquid onto his fingers messily. He prepared Ryan quickly, before ripping the condom package open and rolling the latex covering on. Ryan groaned in pain and pleasure as Derrick entered him swiftly, pushing hard until he was balls deep inside the brunet. With the amount of alcohol in their systems, it didn't take long of either of them to reach their orgasms as Derrick started thrusting into the smaller body below him.

Ryan whimpered, his hips jerking as his came with out being touch. He grunted when Derrick's full weight came crashing down on him. Ryan wasn't sure how long it was before Derrick pushed himself up and started pulling out. Ryan suddenly gasped in pain, and gripped the back of Derrick's leg. “Wait, don't move, ow, fuck that hurts.”

“What the hell are ya talkin' `bout?” Derrick mumbled, pulling back, barely noticing that he slipped out of the condom he put on.

Ryan gritted his teeth. “Turn on a light, man.”

“Why? I want to sleep,” Derrick protested.

“Just do it!”

Grumbling, Derrick reached over and flicked on the lamp on his nightstand. Looking back at Ryan, he gasped at what he saw. “Holy shit, dude you're bleeding all over my fucking sheets!”

Ryan winced as he to get a better look at himself. He paled when he saw blood on his inner thighs and on the bedspread below him. “I need an ambulance. Go, call 911!” Watching Derrick stagger out of the room, Ryan looked at the tube of lube they used and groaned in embarrassment when he saw it was a tube of hair gel.

End of Flashback

“…The doctors almost called the cops on Derrick when they saw how injured I was but when I told them we were drunk and hair gel was used as a lubricant,” Ryan said, snuggling into Eric's one-arm embrace. “I was stuck with stitches and six months of celibacy before I was confident enough to…Calleigh, it's not funny!”

Calleigh miserably failed at trying to cover her laughter. “I'm sorry, but that's really funny! Hair gel?!”

“And you've clearly had more than enough to drink,” The brunet grumbled. Horatio pulled Ryan's legs onto his lap and rubbed his feet soothingly. “If it makes you feel better, she's the only one laughing.”

Ryan rolled his eyes. “That's because you two are men and can understand the pain better than she can and neither of you want to sleep on the couch tonight.”

Eric slipped his other arm around him. “You know us too well.”

“Okay Eric, your turn,” Calleigh said, after she calmed down.

“Only if you promise not to laugh,” Eric said.

“Scout's honor.” Calleigh held her hand up like she was about to take am oath.

Eric regarded her with suspicion before speaking. “I had just picked up a girl from a club and we were in one of the backrooms…”

Flashback

Eric explored his latest fling's mouth with expertise as his fingers fumbled over one another to get his belt done. He moved down to attack her throat when he harshly pulled his zipper down and abruptly pain sparked up his spine. “Dammit!” He pulled away from her and gripped his crotch tenderly.

“What's wrong, baby?” The girl asked, looking concerned.

Eric hesitantly looked down and winced at what he saw. “I'm, um, caught in my zipper,” He mumbled, his cheeks heating up in embarrassment.

The beautiful brunette suppressed a giggle at his words. “I work at the Memorial Hospital, I can help.”

End of flashback

“Oooo you weren't hurt too badly, were you?” Calleigh asked.

“Worst damage done was to my pride,” Eric replied. “It was a little awkward after that, so we parted ways.”

“You laugh at me, yet you get all sympathetic Eric gets stuck in his zipper —not that I'm not,” Ryan scoffed, though his voice held no venom.

“Oh c'mon, hair gel? In all my years as a CSI and party girl, I have never once heard of anyone getting literally joined at the hips,” Calleigh said, drinking the last of her beer. “Besides, I now what it's like getting caught in your zipper.” Ryan, Eric, and Horatio stared at her. “What? I wasn't wearing anything underneath a tight sweater I was trying to zip up. Don't ask, long story.”

“Riiiight, that was an image I did not need in my head,” Ryan muttered, rubbing his eyes.

Eric smirked. “H, what about you?”

“I'd rather not—”

“Nah ah, you can't not say anything because we've already said ours, and now you have to too,” Ryan said. “Please? Even Calleigh said hers.”

“Not exactly my most embarrassing time,” Calleigh murmured under her breath.

“What did you say?” Ryan looked at her.

“Nothing.”

Ryan looked back at Horatio. “Well?”

Horatio sighed in resignation, seeing that he was going to get out of this. “I was at a convention several years ago and met someone from North Dakota. We got together for drinks then headed back to his hotel room…”

Flashback

Horatio panted, wrapping his legs around Henry's waist as the larger man pounded into him with enough force to rhythmically knock the headboard against the wall. The red head groaned, his fingernails digging into his bedmate's back. Feeling his orgasm coming close, Horatio began thrusting into Henry's grip that was around his erection.

“God, you feel so damn good around me,” Henry growled, setting an even more punishing pace, as he started searching for Horatio's sweet spot. He smirked at Horatio cry of ecstasy.

Suddenly, there was a loud cracking sound. Horatio yelled out in surprise as his head was stuck in between the now-broken wooden bars of the headboard.

End of Flashback

He looked up at his team when he was met with silence. Calleigh was busy trying to muffle her giggles with her hands while Ryan and Eric were biting the insides of their mouths to keep their faces straight. “And you threaten me with the couch,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“You're head got stuck in the headboard?! That's priceless!!” Calleigh burst out laughing.

“Just remember that everything we've said tonight doesn't leave this room,” Horatio said, downing the last of his drink. “Or else the squeaker gets dumpster dives for the next three months.”

“You're such a killjoy,” Eric grumbled, though he was grinning.

“You know, this explains why none of you use hair gel, Eric has no zippers in his jeans and your bed has no headboard,” Calleigh said, leaning back into her armchair.

Horatio raised an eyebrow. “And you were in our bedroom because…?”

“I was looking for the bathroom,” she replied innocently, standing. “Well, its getting late, and I need to get home.”

“I'll call you a cab,” Ryan said. He stood and headed into the kitchen to get the phone.

“Aw, but I can always just use the guest bedroom,” Calleigh said, grinning. “It'd save me money.”

“No shows for you,” Eric said shaking his head at the blonde CSI.

Calleigh pouted. “Killjoy.”

 

Jodine16: I have yet to read a story with this sort of plot so I decided to write it. Review please and later days!