D. Gray-man Fan Fiction ❯ To Catch a Golem ❯ Chapter 1

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

The golden golem hovered over the bed, wings slowly beating, recording the scene below it.

Not that it didn't have plenty of similar scenes in its memory already. After all, it still retained the last year of its tenure with Cross Marian in addition to everything that had happened since it had been with Allen Walker.

Said Exorcist was on his back on the bed now, naked, eyes closed and mouth opened in a gasp. Yes, it was definitely a picture the golem was familiar with. But at least Allen only did the naked-and-gaspy thing with one person, the one-eyed, red-haired boy. Unlike Cross.

The redhead was bent over Allen's chest now; tongue caressing an erect nipple as his hand rapidly stroked Allen's erection, a flush and sheen of sweat covering his skin. Timcampy recorded it all, wondering, to the extent it could do such a thing, what the purpose of such an activity was. It certainly had nothing to do with battling Akuma. The humans didn't seem to gain anything useful from it -- they just got hot and sweaty and messy.

“Lavi,” Allen cried as the redhead began to suckle the nipple. “Oh, Lavi!”

Timcampy swooped in for a closer picture of the scene, and its wings touched the tip of Allen's nose. He reached up and batted at the golem, impatiently. “Not now, Timcampy!'” he gasped.

Lavi raised his head, a questioning look in his eye. “The golem again?” he said.

“Don't worry about it,” Allen panted. “Just . . . just . . .”

He pulled Lavi's head down toward his, and their mouths stuck together, looking to Timcampy like they were trying to eat each other. Allen wrapped his arms around Lavi's back, and his legs around his hips, and the boys began to grind against each other, Allen letting out a long, low “uuuhhh!” sound when their lips parted.

Timcampy pulled back, wondering how long it would be before Allen gave him something *interesting* to record again.

TO CATCH A GOLEM

A D. Gray-Man Fanfic With Lemon

By Sailor Mac

Allen awoke to Lavi's fingers stroking his cheek. He made a small “mmm” noise and reached up with his right hand, covering Lavi's.

He could feel a brush of fabric at the other end of the hand. His lover was dressed already.

“Gotta go now,” he whispered. “If the Panda finds out I didn't sleep in my own bed, I'm a dead man.”

Allen's answer to this was to turn his head and kiss the palm of the hand that was stroking him. “Hey, don't tempt me, now,” Lavi whispered. “You look too damn cute in the morning to leave behind as it is.”

*I don't want you to leave me behind,* Allen thought. But he knew that was the terms of their secret relationship -- Lavi's duty as a Bookman had to come first. And Allen couldn't blame him. He definitely let *nothing* stand in the way of his own duty as an Exorcist.

“If we don't get sent out,” Lavi continued, “maybe we can get in some private time after dinner, `k?” He kissed Allen's forehead. “See you at breakfast, Bean Sprout.”

Allen rolled over into the spot of the bed Lavi had occupied as he heard the door close behind his lover. He wondered sometimes why these goodbyes were getting harder all the time. It wasn't as if he was not used to being alone -- heaven only knew he wasn't exactly living in affectionate company during his time with Cross.

He opened his eyes, expecting to see Timcampy still fluttering around the room, like it had been during his passionate coupling with Lavi the night before. His eyes beheld nothing but the first light of dawn peeking in through the window.

*Probably just flying around the hall*, he thought, knowing that Timcampy had an uncanny ability to squeeze under doors. And he closed his eyes and went back to sleep, breathing in Lavi's lingering scent on the pillow.

* * *

“Have either of you seen anything of my brother lately?” Linalee said to Lavi and Allen over breakfast.

The two boys looked at each other and then at her. It was definitely a strange thing to ask, since Linalee was very often the only person who *did* see Komui during the rare stretches of quiet time for the Order.

“Um, no,” Allen said. “Haven't you?”

“He's been holed up in his lab nonstop for about three days now,” she said, spreading jelly on her toast. “He hasn't even come out for meals. I asked Jerry, and he said he's been taking trays up and shoving them through the slot in the door.”

Allen swallowed hard. This did *not* sound good. Whenever Komui did that, the result was usually something called “Komurin-plus-a-number,” which would wreak all kinds of destruction.

“Hey, maybe he'll actually manage to invent something *useful* for once,” Lavi said. “Like something that'll clean your room for you.”

“We know somebody who needs *that*, don't we?” Bookman said dryly from his perch at the edge of a bench beside his student, digging a small spoon into a soft-boiled egg.

“I know where everything is!” Lavi said around a mouthful of bacon.

“I certainly hope you know where the *mice* and *bugs* are,” Bookman said.

“Lavi doesn't have mice and bugs,” Allen said, and then suddenly clammed up, willing his face not to flush pink. He felt like an animal facing a hunter's arrow when the old man turned a fierce glare on him.

“You've been in his room?” Bookman said.

Allen swallowed hard. “Um, well . . .”

“You *are* a brave one,” Bookman said, and went back to his egg.

Allen let out a breath of relief that was so long, he thought he was going to deflate completely and become just a flat, empty shell lying on the chair. Keeping up their secret relationship was flat-out nerve-wracking sometimes.

When he heard someone behind him yell, “Get a room, why doncha?” his first thought was they'd been found out, that someone had heard them, or seen them steal a kiss on the grounds around the Order headquarters. He turned around with a start, only to see a young Finder with a face shaped nearly like a zucchini and a riot of bushy chocolate-colored hair kissing a pretty, curly-haired blond with an ample figure who was one of Jerry's under-cooks.

“Rudy and Amanda are at it again?” Linalee shook her head. “They're going to be in real trouble if any Generals come here.”

“Not my Master,” Allen mumbled. “He'd pull Amanda away from Rudy and kiss her himself.” *And do a lot more,* he thought. He didn't want to think about some of the scenes he'd walked in on.

“Anyway,” Linalee said, picking up her toast again, “I'm starting to get really worried about my brother. Last time he did this, he . . .”

Allen dug into his piles of food, not wanting to hear about what happened. Maybe stuffing his stomach with breakfast would keep the sick feeling of dread out of it.

In his mind's eye, he could see Komui flying into the dining hall like a whirlwind, hair in wild disarray, lab coat covered with scorch marks and blotches from a wide variety of chemicals, crowing, “I've got it! It's ready! And you'll see the results today! I'm going to revolutionize . . .”

Allen cringed, wondering what the next words would be. Revolutionize food? They'd be dodging flung vegetables all over Headquarters. Revolutionize cleaning? The place would be a wreck by the end of the day. Revolutionize laundry? Their uniforms would be in shreds.

He was brought back to reality by the sharp rap of a fork against the top of his head. “Hey, Bean Sprout, she asked you a question!” Lavi said.

“Stop calling me that!” Allen retorted.

“I asked you what you think my brother's doing,” Linalee said. “People are reporting some really strange noises and smells from in there . . .”

Allen put his face in his hands. “This means another Komurin, doesn't it?”

“Well, at least the last one wasn't so bad,” Lavi said. Leaning over, he whispered, “You looked cute with that makeup on. Although I think you looked cuter when *I* drew on your face.” He then hopped, with a yelp of pain, when Allen kicked his lover under the table.

“I certainly hope you're not planning on lingering here all day, Lavi,” Bookman said. “Remember, you're way behind on your records. And you *do* have part of the library to reorganize. The shelves at the *very top*.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Lavi said. He leaned over and whispered to Allen, “Wish they'd send us on a mission. A nice, long one. We wouldn't have to see Komui's invention and I wouldn't have to spend the day . . .”

“I heard that!” Bookman took a swing at his heir. “How do you expect to replace me if you can't do your job?”

“I'm doing it, I'm doing it!” Lavi leapt up from the table and rushed away from his mentor. “I'm just going at my own pace!”

“Your pace makes a turtle look speedy!” Bookman said, getting up and following him.

“I'm going to see if I can find anything out about my brother,” Linalee said, getting up from the table. “Bressler in the Science Department should be able to tell me something.”

“I'm . . . not sure what I'm doing,” Allen said. He wasn't used to having much downtime. After spending so many years as the errand boy for Cross, and becoming a near-professional gambler, he didn't know what downtime *was*.

He'd hoped he'd be able to spend time with Lavi today, but that didn't look like it was going to happen.

“Maybe we'll go to the main library, Timcampy,” he said to the golem as he got up. “There are parts of it that I haven't seen . . .”

“Oh, there you are, Allen!” said a voice from behind him. He turned around to see Reever, a stack of folders in his hand. “Can you give us a hand with something?”

“Um, sure,” he said, following Komui's assistant toward the main office. “What is it?”

“Well, since the boss seems to have gone missing for a few days, we thought we'd reorganize his office. We can never do it when he's there. There are a few files we need you to sort through, organize, put in boxes . . .”

*A few files?* Allen thought. *That doesn't sound too bad.* “Sure,” he said. “Glad to help.”

“Great!” Reever said. “They're in here . . .” He threw open a door, and Allen cringed. Files were flung everywhere, stacked haphazardly in huge mountains on every available surface, piled in heaps on the floor, layered higgledy-piggledy in the closet.

“This is the first batch,” Reever said. “There's more one room over.”

Allen started to twitch. He suddenly felt like he was back with Cross again.

*So much for having a nothing day,* he thought.

* * *

Allen dragged himself down the hall, Timcampy fluttering listlessly above his head. Finally, finally, it was over. He didn't think the Order had so many files. He didn't think the whole *world* had so many files.

Fortunately, as he rounded the corner, he saw a tall figure going down the hall ahead of him, looking equally droopy. He must have heard Allen, because he turned around with a smile and said, “Hey, there. Looks like you had a hell of a day, too.”

“Komui's staff got me,” Allen mumbled. “Files . . . so many files . . .”

“I spent half the day on a ladder. Told the Panda I was getting a nosebleed from the height. He didn't believe me.” He unlocked his bedroom door. “C'mere, I think we both need some rest time right now.”

Allen was glad to hear that. He loved having quiet time with Lavi -- or as quiet as the incessantly chattering redhead could get. He followed the other boy into the bedroom, gingerly stepping past stacks of books and a couple of boots on the floor.

“The old geezer said my records have been improving over the last month,” Lavi was saying, pulling off his boots and headband and flinging himself on the bed. “Wants to know why. Ha, as if I was gonna tell him that I can concentrate better now that I'm gettin' some.” He patted the bed next to him in invitation.

“So what was he doing while you were doing all that work in the library?” Allen said, sliding off his own boots and lying down beside his lover, his head on his chest.

“Reading over old papers and muttering to himself.” Lavi wrapped an arm around Allen. “Personally, I think he was studying a makeup manual. That raccoon-eye look of his has gotta go.”

The mention of *eye* piqued Allen's curiosity about something. He lifted his head, reached up and touched Lavi's eyepatch. “Lavi . . . why do you have this?” he said.

“This?” Lavi put his hand up, covering Allen's. “Well . . . you know, we have different levels of secrecy about things. We have Things We're Open About, Things We Tell People When We Really Have To and Things We Aren't Even Supposed To Tell To Sexy Bean Sprouts.”

Allen flushed. He wanted to retort about the “Bean Sprout” part as normal, but he'd called him *sexy* before that. “Um, so . . . the eyepatch is top-secret?”

“It is, but . . .” Lavi looked around. “Okay, I'm gonna tell you anyway,” he said, dropping his voice to a whisper, just in case the Panda had a glass pressed to the wall -- he wouldn't put it past him. “People who are born with the ability to be a Bookman . . . they have a special eye that can see extra-sharp. Kinda like a telescope. And while you're in training, you gotta keep it covered so you learn not to depend too much on it.”

Allen frowned. “That doesn't make sense.”

“Lotsa this stuff doesn't make sense,” Lavi said, reaching beside the bed and fumbling around. “We just kinda do it because it's always been done.” He found what he was looking for and dragged the book back to the bed. “Wanna continue the story we were reading?”

Allen wondered if he was being elusive, if he didn't want to talk too much about Bookman traditions with him, but he certainly wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to lie there cuddled against Lavi while his lover read to him -- light fantasy books, not the historical tomes Lavi usually read on his own. It was always reminiscent of being a child, and curling up against Mana as he read to him, and knowing he was safe and secure and loved.

“Sure,” he said.

He rested his head against Lavi's chest again and closed his eyes, only half-hearing the words -- something about a disappearing cat that left behind only its smile -- just letting the sensations wash over him, the warmth of Lavi's body, his scent, the sound of his voice . . .

Gradually, he felt another emotion rising inside him, and it had nothing to do with innocent storytelling and everything to do with the man next to him. Allen sometimes was shocked at his own ability to go from zero to lustful in mere seconds. He wondered if his parasite-type Innocence was a factor in that, if everyone with a lover felt that way.

Allen turned a little more toward Lavi, and the gentle cuddling now became a more intense rubbing against his lover -- head brushing against his chest, torso wriggling ever-so-slightly.

Lavi didn't miss what was going on. He was getting very good at reading Allen's cues. “Think you may be interested in something other than this book, Bean Sprout,” he said, setting it aside and wrapping his arms around Allen.

“I'm not a MMMPH!” Allen's inevitable retort was cut off by Lavi's lips coming down on his, hard, and all protests were gone as he eagerly opened his mouth, pushing his tongue toward the redhead's.

Allen rolled so he was fully atop Lavi now, his mouth devouring his lover's, hands grasping his wrists and pinning them down to the bed. He rapidly pushed his tongue toward Lavi's, stroking and caressing.

When their lips parted, he scraped his teeth ever-so-lightly down Lavi's throat, just enough so he could *feel* it, and was rewarded with a loud groan.

“Damn,” Lavi panted. “You're *really* aggressive tonight, Allen.” The response was another nip at his throat. “Not that I'm complaining, see.”

Allen wasn't sure what had gotten into him himself. He just knew that he felt overwhelmed with *need*, and the desire to feel his skin on Lavi's. He pushed up on the taller boy's shirt, and Lavi wriggled away just long enough to pull it off.

Allen yanked at his own tie, undoing the buttons of shirt and vest as fast as he could, tossing them on the floor so that when he lay on top of his lover, there was nothing against him but *Lavi*. A thrill went through him as he realized his lover's flesh was hot and damp, sweating and lusting for *him*.

A small “What the hell is happening to me?” in the back of his mind was drowned out by the *sensation* as he and Lavi kissed again, tongues rubbing against each other as Lavi ran his fingernails up and down Allen's back, lightly, just as Allen had done with his teeth, which sent another shudder running through the younger boy.

Allen didn't even realize that he'd moved into a position where he was straddling Lavi, rocking his still-clothed erection against his lover's, until he felt the heat and the tingling and heard Lavi's near-growl.

“Don't you think that would be a lot more fun without *pants*, babe?” Lavi said, breathlessly, his hands gripping Allen's ass.

Allen was going to shoot off a retort to the pet name, but decided it was better than “Bean Sprout” -- especially at a time like this. He reached down and yanked Lavi's fly open, then did the same to himself, pulling back just long enough for them to shed the rest of their clothing.

But once he saw Lavi lying back down on the bed, his erection standing hotly against a thicket of red hair, an different idea popped into his head. He shifted so that he was kneeling with his legs on either side of Lavi's shoulders, then leaned over, sliding his mouth down over Lavi's cock.

He'd learned to do this very quickly, and just as quickly, he'd come to love it. Lavi just felt so *good* in his mouth, the heat and the shape and the way it *filled* him. He started to suck, and heard Lavi moan “Oh, babe, yes . . .”

Then, he felt something unexpected -- hot wetness on his own erection. He hadn't even realized that his position would allow Lavi to use his own mouth as well, and when the realization dawned, it just made everything all the more *hotter*.

Allen moved faster, sucking harder, and he felt Lavi's tongue on him, running up and down his cock, brushing over the head, and then his lover's lips . . . He purred around Lavi's hardness, pulling it out of his mouth and flicking his tongue over the tip, just as Lavi did to him.

He gripped his lover's thighs as Lavi's hand grasped his erection, stroking the shaft as he caressed the tip with lips and tongue. His breath came rapidly as he plunged Lavi deeper still into his mouth, surprising even himself with how far he could take it, and he felt Lavi tense, knowing what was about to happen.

He didn't pull away, like he usually did when they did this. He felt Lavi shudder, and then his mouth was flooded with a bitter, salty fluid that he nearly choked on at first -- then, an automatic reflex kicked in, and he gulped, swallowing it.

He felt Lavi go completely limp under him, and the licking and caressing stopped for a moment. Then, he was suddenly rolled onto his back, and Lavi slid down Allen `s body, taking his cock deep in his mouth and sucking, *hard*, making Allen arch up and moan. It was right on the border of pleasure and pain, right at the point where it could drive . . . you . . . absolutely . . .

It didn't take long for Allen to go over the edge, crying Lavi's name out loudly, fingers tangling in the red hair as he shuddered with ecstasy, and shuddered again, thinking it would never end, and Lavi was still sucking him, as if he wanted to get every drop.

When Allen finally collapsed to the bed, trembling and panting, he felt Lavi kiss his cheeks and forehead, softly. He wrapped both arms around the older boy, purring and burying his head in his chest.

“Damn, that was intense, babe,” Lavi said, nuzzling his cheek against Allen's hair. “You really go for it when you know what you want, don't you?”

Now that the desire was sated, Allen felt a bit embarrassed at how aggressive he'd been. “Um, was that all right?” he said, not moving his head.

“All right? That's an understatement. You damn near ate me alive, and I loved every minute of it. You should do that more often, it'll be good for both of us.” He kissed the top of Allen's head. “Wow. I think I'm *still* havin' aftershocks. I'm gonna be coming three days later.”

Allen couldn't help but chuckle at the mental image of Lavi having to deal with Bookman, trying to keep a straight face -- or as straight as Lavi's face ever got -- while having one little shudder of pleasure after another.

But as he cuddled against his lover, warm and cozy in the afterglow, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was *wrong*. Or, at least, *different*.

And then, he realized what it was. There was no fluttering of wings, no golden golem swooping down and interfering in their lovemaking. He sat up and looked around him . . . no sign of Timcampy anywhere.

Lavi raised his head. “Eh? What's wrong, babe?”

Allen turned around. “Lavi, Timcampy's missing.”

“Missing? What do you mean?”

“I mean, he's usually flying around the bedroom when we . . . um, do what we just did, and . . . he's not here! Anywhere!”

“Probably just got sick of watching us -- thought I don't see why anyone would get sick of you bein' hot -- and took off somewhere,” Lavi yawned. “He'll be back.”

With a sigh, Allen snuggled against Lavi's chest again, purring softly as the other boy's arms tightened around him.

He hoped Lavi was right. One thing a disappearing Timcampy could very well mean was his original master was still in the vicinity -- and Cross was something he just did *not* want to deal with. He'd put that part of his life behind him, and he very much wanted it to *stay* there.

* * *

Timcampy wasn't back when Allen and Lavi went down to dinner. Nor had the golem returned afterward, when Allen slipped out of the dining hall before Reever could confront him with more files (he was *sure* there had to be yet another closet of them somewhere).

He was on his way to the elevator to the lookout point at the very top of the Headquarters -- there was a very powerful telescope up there, and he figured it might at least be a help in spotting the Golem, if it were flying around anywhere in the vicinity -- when he spotted Linalee, who was on her way out of the science wing. She'd been rather quiet at dinner; he knew that meant there was still no word on what her brother was doing.

“Oh, Allen,” she said. “I didn't think you'd be up here this time of night.”

“Still nothing?” he said.

She shook her head. “Even the people in the Science Department are getting concerned. Usually, when he's got a project, he lets them in there, but . . .” She shook her head.

“I'm sorry,” Allen said, feeling a bit awkward. What did one say to a friend whose only relative might be plotting something that could ultimately result in accidental world destruction?

“So I thought I'd go upstairs for a few minutes,” she said. “What about you?”

“Timcampy's missing. I thought I'd look for him.”

She turned quizzical eyes on him. “Missing?”

“He disappeared this afternoon, and didn't come back for dinner, and . . . it's not like him.” He pushed the elevator button.

“Golems do return to their masters if they're in the vicinity, you know,” she said as the doors opened and they got on. “Maybe that means that . . .”

“Don't say that!” Allen said, cringing. “I don't even want to think about it!”

“It *could* be why Timcampy disappeared,” Linalee said as the car started to move upward, creaking and groaning like the doors of a haunted house. “Maybe Cross is on his way to the Order to see how you are doing.”

“My Master wouldn't do that!” Allen said, in a panicky voice. “He's not coming here! He hates this place, remember? He . . .”

Linalee put a hand on his shoulder. “Allen . . . what did Cross *do* to you? You react this way every time someone as much as *mentions* him.”

“N-nothing!” he said. “It . . . it was . . .” The elevator arrived, and the doors started to slide open. “I'll tell you another time.”

The two walked out on the roof, only to see two figures huddled in the darkness, entwined in each other. They broke apart, gasping, when they heard the footsteps.

“Sorry, sorry!” the young Finder named Rudy stammered, waving long, thin hands in front of his long, thin face. “We didn't know anyone was here!”

Allen stood rooted to the spot, flushing crimson. “Um, um, it's okay!” he said, waving his hands in front of his own face. He figured that between himself and Rudy, they looked like a couple of birds ready for takeoff. “I was just up here to look for my golem, that's all!”

“Golem?” Rudy said.

“He has a special golem,” said the woman beside him, sliding her arms around his waist and drawing him back against her curvy body. “Gold, with bird wings and a big cross. We see a lot of this boy in the kitchen.”

“Oh, *that* golem!” Rudy said. “Yeah, I saw it headin' down the mountain before when I was waiting for Amanda. Thought I'd seen it somewhere before.”

Allen and Linalee glanced at each other. “Can you tell me where it went?” Allen said.

“It was headin' for the forest down there, right about . . . there.” Rudy pointed at a spot on the east side of the building. “And then it kind of hovered at the top of the trees, bobbing up and down.”

“We're going down there,” Allen said, grabbing Linalee's arm. “Thanks!” he called toward Rudy and turned toward the elevator . . . only to have the doors open again, Lavi walking out into the observatory.

“Kinda thought I'd find you up here!” he said to Allen. “Still missing?”

“We think we know where Timcampy went!” Allen said, pointing toward the windows. “Rudy saw him leave.”

Amanda grabbed her boyfriend's arm and snapped, “Rudy, I thought you said this place was *private!*”

“It is . . . usually!” The young Finder looked like he wanted to melt into the floor.

“Well, we'll take the fast way down,” Lavi said, reaching for the hammer on his belt.

Linalee suddenly backed off, looking concerned. “I'll ride the wind currents down, thanks,” she said.

“Innocence, activate!” Lavi said, tossing the hammer in the air, and a tongue of greenish-silver flame wrapped around the handle as the divine force within it leapt to life.

“Whatsa matter?” he said, catching the small magical weapon out of the air and starting to twirl it, making it expand bit by bit. “Don't you trust my Hammer?”

“I do, it's just . . . I like doing it myself better!” She started to walk toward the window, rapidly, saying, “Innocence, activate!” The small boots she was wearing shot out ribbonlike black tendrils that wrapped around her legs all the way to her thighs, solidifying as the heels started glowing with the same greenish-silver flames.

Amanda pushed her boyfriend away. “Now they're getting out Innocence? They're going to have *target practice* up here! You might has well have brought me to King's Cross Station, Rudy!”

“But . . . but . . .” Rudy looked toward Allen, panicked. “Help me out here!”

“Um, he didn't mean to put you in the middle of a crowd!” Allen backed away, step by step. “Matter of fact, we were just going! Really!” He felt something wrap around his waist and jerk, and found himself pressed tightly against Lavi's body.

“Ready?” the taller boy said, gripping tightly to the handle of his weapon.

“Lavi, I didn't say that I . . .”

“Don't worry, I'll get you down safe! I haven't hurt you yet, have I? Extend!”

“Wwwaaaauuugghhh!!!” Allen shouted as he felt himself being hurled out through the window and into the night, gripping onto his lover's arm around his waist for dear life, suddenly thinking this Timcampy hunt was Not A Good Idea After All, especially when the wind whistled past his ears, and the stars blazed past his eyes like comets, and there was a sickening churning in his stomach as they fell down, down, down . . .

The ground was rushing up at them, and suddenly, they were colliding with it, and Lavi let go of Allen and Allen found himself rolling over and over and over until he thought he would fall off the island of Great Britain altogether and end up somewhere in the ocean.

When he finally stopped, he was lying flat on his back, the whole world spinning around him as he looked up at the stars, the man in the nearly-full moon seeming to laugh at his misfortune.

Beside him, Lavi retracted his hammer and said, “Well, didn't do so bad this time, did I? Landing was an eency bit rough, but . . .”

Allen sat up, slowly, head still spinning. If this was “an eency bit rough,” he didn't want to see Lavi's concept of “a flat-out crash landing.” He heard a gentle *whoosh* beside him as Linalee landed, and felt her hand on his arm, pulling him to his feet.

“Allen! Are you all right?” she said.

“At least we didn't land head-first this time,” Allen grumbled.

“I saw Timcampy as I was coming down to the ground,” Linalee said, pointing toward the north. “He was headed that way, kind of flying through the tops of the trees, as if he were . . . well . . . *looking* for something.”

“Great!” Lavi said, starting to twirl the handle of his hammer. “You two just grab on to me and . . .”

“We can catch up to him on foot,” she said, grabbing Allen's wrist and pulling him after her so fast that Allen expected his arm to break clean off.

“Hey, this is faster!” Lavi said, starting to rush after Linalee as she walked away.

“She's got a point,” Allen said. “We may miss Timcampy if we're . . . airborne.”

They followed in the direction that Linalee pointed, keeping their eyes upward -- which didn't work out well for Allen at one point, as his foot hit a tree root and he went flying. Just when he thought he was going to be eating dirt for the second time that day, Lavi's arm wrapped around him and pulled him back.

“You all right?” the taller boy said.

“I've had worse happen,” Allen said, getting back to his feet, hoping Linalee didn't see him flush when he felt Lavi's warm body against his. Because certain parts of Lavi had been pressing tantalizingly against certain parts of Allen.

“Linalee's gotten ahead, I'm catching up!” he said, quickly, rushing after his friend.

“I think I see him,” she called back. “Up ahead!”

“Has he slowed down any?” Allen said, once he was nearly caught up to her.

“Still looks like he's looking for something,” she called back.

“Or someone?” Lavi said.

Allen suddenly drew up short, giving a great shudder. “Don't even *think* that!” he said to his lover.

Lavi looked confused. “Think what?”

“Timcampy . . . out here looking for *him* . . . for my Master . . .”

“Well, at least you can have a happy teacher-and-student reunion with him, then!” said Lavi, cheerfully . . . then almost instantly doubled over in pain as he was clotheslined to the gut. “Ow!” he said, dropping to his knees. “Did you have to use *that* arm?”

“You're lucky it wasn't activated,” Allen said in a voice dripping with ice.

“I've lost sight of him!” Linalee called. “He went somewhere in *that* cluster of trees over there, and disappeared.”

Allen's heart sank. What if Cross *was* in that cluster of trees? What if his Master had come to drag him away from the Order, the only home he'd known since he lost Mana, and he'd be forced to cheat at cards to stay one step ahead of debtor's prison again, and he'd never see Lavi anymore, and . . .

“I'm going up to take a look,” Linalee said, activating her Innocence again. She hopped up into the tree, bouncing from branch to branch as lightly as she could, so as not to startle the golem.

As Allen watched her, he felt a hand land on his shoulder and squeeze it. “Don't worry,” Lavi said. “If it *is* Cross, I'll get you out of here before he knows you're even on the same side of the country.”

Allen reached up and covered the hand with his own. “Thanks,” he said. He didn't move the hand, just stood breathing the crisp, night air, feeling their closeness.

“Bet I could break my own speed record,” Lavi said, squeezing Allen's shoulder a bit tighter. “When we were in China, the Panda caught me peeking through trees at a ladies' baths. He came after me with a huge tree branch and I knew I had to get out of there right away or he was going to knock me right offa my . . .”

Both boys jumped with a yelp as a great, dark shadow plummeted down from the sky and landed in front of them. Allen half-expected his eye to activate . . . until a familiar voice said, “It's me, it's me!”

“Geez, Linalee, will you *warn* us before you swoop down on us like that?” Lavi said.

“You have to come with me,” she whispered.

“Sure, soon as I pick up my heart and put it back in my chest cavity,” Lavi replied.

“I'm serious!” she whispered. “Allen, you're coming with me.” She grabbed him about the waist before Lavi could object and bounced up into the trees.

Allen had to admit that Linalee at least had softer landings than Lavi, although the constant up-and-down bouncing motion could make someone who wasn't used to it more than a bit queasy. They bounded from treetop to treetop, and soon Allen could make out a slight golden shimmer . . . and another shimmer beside it.

She landed in the crouch of an ancient oak and pointed to the free opposite them. “Take a look,” she whispered.

Allen leaned over . . . and got a shower of leaves in his face. There was the sound of snapping twigs and branches above them, and Lavi landed on the limb beside Allen, grabbing on with one hand for dear life, the other still holding his hammer.

“Whew!” he whispered. “Lucky thing I aimed at the right tree!”

“No, it's a lucky thing you didn't scare them off,” Linalee replied.

“Them?” Allen said, looking puzzled and brushing the leaves from his face -- and then, he could make out the scene before him.

There was Timcampy perched on a tree branch, and perched beside him was another golem like himself. The basic design was the same, but the color was a shiny metallic pink, and it had a heart on the front where Timcampy had a cross.

“It's . . . a *female* golem?” Allen said -- then let out a small yelp as Lavi bopped him over the head.

“Golems don't come in male and female, stupid,” the junior Bookman said. “Machines, remember? Communication devi -- what the *hell*?”

The two golems were now close together. *Very* close. In fact, they seemed to be *hitched* to each other. And they were starting to vibrate . . . first slowly, then gradually getting faster.

The three just sat there, mouths agape. Lavi leaned across Allen to put a hand over Linalee's eyes.

“They . . . they . . . can't do that, can they?” Allen said, feeling his skin burning up.

“Lavi! I can't see!” Linalee tried to twist away from her friend's hand without falling off the branch.

“Oh, don't worry,” Lavi said. “I'm seeing enough for all three of us.”

“What are they doing now?” Linalee made another effort to escape, to no avail.

“Dunno,” Lavi said, “but from the looks of things, in a moment, Timcampy's gonna be smoking a cigarette.”

Allen just stared. The vibrating seemed to have slowed down now, and the two golems were moving apart, and Timcampy's wings looked awfully limp, and . . .

*He didn't get the idea from watching Lavi and me . . . did he?* he thought.

Lavi took his hand away from Linalee's eyes just as the two golems took off, flying in opposite directions.

“Well, then,” Lavi said, “you have your answer, Allen. Timcampy's in love.”

“You just said yourself that they're just machines!” Allen said, turning around so abruptly he almost shook all three of them off the branch.

“No regular machine does *that*,” Lavi said.

“I wish I could have seen what it was,” Linalee said, grabbing Allen about the waist before Lavi could hitch him to the hammer again.

“No, you don't,” Allen said, bracing himself for the bouncing. “You really don't.”

The picture was still in his mind as Linalee hopped from tree to tree. It really, really looked like . . . well, what he'd walked in on his master doing with several different ladies on several different locations. And he'd hoped he'd put the mental pictures of *those* occasions away forever.

*Do Lavi and I look like *that*? he thought, clinging to Linalee as she approached the cliff leading up to the Order's tower.

“I hope you don't mind,” she said, “I'll have to activate level two in order to get up. It's a bit trickier than getting down.”

“I don't mind,” he said, his brain still full of the bizarre picture of the vibrating golems to care about anything else.

“Okay!” she said -- and suddenly, there was a *booming* noise, and dead silence, and Allen felt like his guts were being wrenched out of him through his nose, and then another *boom*, and she was letting go of him and he was sagging to the floor, groaning and struggling to keep his dinner down.

“Oh, I'm sorry, Allen,” she said. “I should have warned you that traveling at the speed of sound is a bit rough at first.”

Allen waved a hand dismissively, wondering if the hammer might have been a better option after all.

* * *

Timcampy was waiting in his room when he arrived back alone (Lavi had whispered to him in the hallway, “Um, after what we saw, I'm not exactly in the mood right now. Tomorrow, maybe?”) Allen pulled off his jacket, tossed it over a chair and flopped on his back.

“What *were* you doing, Timcampy?” he said as the golem fluttered over to him. “Can you show me? Did you get the idea from what I was doing with Lavi?”

But the golem drew back, as if repulsed by what Allen was saying.

“Maybe I shouldn't have been watching,” the boy said with a sleepy smile. “But why do you hang around when Lavi and I do that, Timcampy? You'd think you saw enough of that with my master . . . but he didn't do it with other guys, did he?” He reached out a hand, and the golem perched on his finger, tentatively.

“You probably wonder why I feel like I do about Lavi, don't you?” he said to Timcampy. “Sometimes I wonder myself. But when we started to get to know each other, something felt . . . right.” The golem fluttered its wings a bit, as if acknowledging what Allen said.

He wondered how much the mechanical creature really understood, if it *knew* it was performing some kind of parody of lovemaking tonight.

*Maybe my master programmed some kind of pervert function into Timcampy,* he thought. And *that* made him duck under the covers, shuddering.

This had been one hell of a day.

* * *

Fortunately, when he arrived for breakfast the next morning, Allen had a temporary distraction from disturbing thoughts of lewd golems, since he saw his lover engaged in his favorite pastime -- Kanda baiting. The Japanese Exorcist was making his way across the dining hall, trying to evade Lavi, who stayed hot on his heels.

“Ah, c'mon, Yuu, tell me about your mission!” Lavi said. “You got back in the middle of the night, and nobody saw you!”

“And there's a *reason* for that,” Kanda hissed.

“I always tell you about *my* missions,* Lavi said. By now, they were nearly at the last table of the dining room. Kanda had nowhere to run unless he wanted to eat near Komui's labs, and even *Kanda* wasn't that brave.

“Like I *wanted* you to?” Kanda rushed over to the far end of the last table, Lavi following. Allen sighed and followed them.

“If you tell us about your mission,” Lavi said, sitting down next to the more-annoyed-than-usual swordsman, “I'll tell you about where *we* went last night.”

“I'm not interested,” Kanda nearly growled.

“Allen, maybe you can have more luck?” Lavi said as Allen put his groaning tray opposite his lover. “Yuu doesn't seem to want to . . .”

Just then, the door to the corridor leading to Komui's labs slammed open, and the director himself rushed into the room, looking just as he had in Allen's worried imaginings the day before -- clothes rumpled and stained, hair a mess, even his glasses slightly skewed. His eyes bore the near-crazed look of someone who had spent several sleepless days obsessively working on something.

“It's done!” he crowed. “It's finally finished! It's the greatest thing I've ever made! Wait until you all see it!”

Lavi leaned across the table, put a hand on Allen's shoulder, and whispered, “Well, Bean Sprout, this is it. Been nice knowin' ya. See ya on the other side.”

Allen swallowed hard, hearing his own heart pounding in his ears. He glanced around the room for Linalee, who was nowhere to be found. *Did he involve his own sister in whatever he was doing?* he thought.

“I'm going to revolutionize . . .”

There was a pause that seemed to last eons. Everyone in the room sat stock-still, looking like the condemned awaiting their fate. Linalee entered the room just in time to hear her brother shout . . .

“COMMUNICATION! I've created the ultimate golem! And the first one is a gift for my dear sister! Take a look!”

Right on cue, the pink golem from the night before fluttered into the room, hovering next to its creator. “It's Timcampy's girlfriend!” Allen whispered to Lavi.

“This golem has a wider range than any golem ever before!” Komui said, pointing to it with the dramatic flourish of a used car salesman showing off a new arrival to the lot. “Clearer sound! Sharper recording! Less interference! Plus special features that are so top-secret, even my assistants don't know about them! I sent the golem out of the lab to get those!”

“Is *that* what was going on?” Allen whispered. “Timcampy was loading *programming* into that thing?”

Lavi gave a sigh of relief. “Nice to know we didn't actually see golem sex,” he whispered back. “I don't have to consider myself scarred for life anymore!”

Allen glanced over to the far side of the room, where Linalee was rooted to the spot by Jerry's window, apparently dumbfounded that her brother had actually invented something *useful*.

“Now, Tourmaline, go to your new mistress,” Komui said, pointing the golem toward Linalee. The pink thing fluttered its wings and started to take off, making a beeline for its new owner . . .

Then, suddenly, it took a sharp turn to the left and zoomed toward the corner, where Amanda and Rudy were taking advantage of the situation to steal a few moments making out. It hovered by the couple for just a second, and then a beam of intense red light shot out of its front and zapped Rudy dangerously close to his crotch.

“YAAA!!!” the Finder screamed, dropping his girlfriend and starting to run away, but the golem followed him, shooting out one red zap after another, each one striking some part of his anatomy and making him give another shriek.

Allen jumped to his feet. “Innocence, activate!” he said. His left arm grew, extending, the fingers twisting into a large, claw-like appendage. He stretched the weapon as far as it could go, grabbing onto the golem and pulling it away from Rudy, allowing the boy to escape from the room.

Everyone just sat in silence, blinking. Then, Linalee approached her brother, slowly, a look of almost eerie calm on her face.

“Brother,” she said, “you had Timcampy load that thing with all his image memories of General Cross doing nasty things with women, didn't you?”

Komui looked flustered. “But . . . but . . . Linalee . . .”

“You programmed it to attack anyone who tried to do those things to *me*, didn't you?” she said, her icy mask looking downright terrifying now.

“I . . . I . . . I'm only looking out for you!” Komui threw his arms around his sister, who stood there stiff as a board.

“Damn,” Lavi whispered. “It's a robot chastity belt!”

Allen put his hand on his lover's arm. “Lavi . . . let's take our food up to my room and eat there.” His other hand, still activated, continued to clutch the golem.

“Why?” Lavi said. “Things are pretty interesting here right . . .”

“Innocence, activate,” Linalee said in the same icy tone.

“*That's* why,” Allen said. “Come on.”

They could hear the banging and crashing behind them as they left the dining room, carrying their trays. Allen released Tourmaline and retracted his arm as soon as they got out of the room, the pink golem fluttering up to fly at Timcampy's side.

“You saved it,” Lavi said, watching the gold and pink golems circle around and around each other, as if in excited greeting.

“I've seen what Linalee's done to Komui's other creations when they go wrong,” Allen said. “I didn't want that to happen to . . .”

“Timcampy's girlfriend?” Lavi said, teasingly.

“They *do* look happy to see each other,” Allen said, gazing up at the two. “I don't know what we're going to do with Tourmaline, though. I don't think Linalee is going to want it -- not after that demonstration in the dining room.”

“We'll give it to the Panda,” Lavi said as they rounded the corner toward Allen's room. “He's been needing a golem of his own, and I don't think *he's* gonna do anything to make that zappy thing go off.”

Allen couldn't help but think that Lavi was also taking a perverse joy at the idea of his mentor being followed around by a girly-looking pink golem with a big heart on it.

“I'll take this to him, and then I'll come back here and we'll have breakfast.” He leaned over and whispered, “And I'm in the mood for dessert, too.”

Allen warily eyed the two golems. Fortunately, neither of them seemed to be in a zappy mood.

He just hoped Komui hadn't decided to experiment on Timcampy as well.

* * *

Timcampy hovered above Allen's bed, taking in the scene below. Breakfast dishes and pieces of clothing were scattered all over the place, and Allen was flat on his back, naked, eyes closed and skin flushed.

Hovering over him was the one-eyed, red-haired boy again, equally naked, slowly running his tongue up the boy's stomach and chest, lingering on a nipple as his hand stroked the part of Allen which got long and hard at times like this.

“Lavi,” Allen moaned. “Oh, Lavi . . .”

As much as Timcampy couldn't understand why humans would want to do this, the golem also didn't understand why Linalee's brother *didn't* want her to do this. The activity didn't seem to have any use, but it didn't seem to do any harm, either.

Humans were obsessed with it, for some reason, though. They spent so much time pursuing this, worrying about this, thinking that it was a matter of life and death . . .

It wasn't. Not really. Humans didn't *need* it . . . but for some reason, they thought they did. Which just made Timcampy more confused.

But . . . at least the golem understood at least a *little* now about why humans wanted to be with each other so much. Especially after the last couple of days. And now, Timcampy was going to leave Lavi and Allen alone, because he had better things to do.

He flew down to the floor, unnoticed, and squeezed under the door, in search of Tourmaline.