D. N. Angel Fan Fiction ❯ Kaosu o Toki Toraberu ❯ Chapter seven: Aprons and Phobias ( Chapter 8 )

Kaosu o Toki Toraberu

 

 

 

Chapter seven: Aprons and Phobias

 

Disclaimer: <.<;; do I really need to say it again? 'Cuz if you don't know by now... Learn to read.

 

 

Summary: Dark and Krad have their own physical forms and end up transported into the past, set in the future with some unusual relationships. With a new enemy out to get them, Dark and Krad must convince their past selves to help them defeat the foe and get them back to their time, however things don't always go as planned.

 

 

 

blah -> author/outside point of view

"blah" -> speaking

`blah' -> thought

/ blah / -> thought between Krad/Satoshi or Dark/Daisuke

 

 

~:~ Niwa's House~:~

 

 

 

“Strange.” Dark said as he walked in the house. Everything was quite; too quite.

 

 

 

“Absolutely NOT!” An unknown scream was heard from the living room; rushing with Emiko in his arms Dark arrived to see Krad backing away from Towa (who had mysteriously gotten into the house before all of them). Towa had in her hands a pink frilly apron and was slowly approaching a cowering Krad. His future self was standing back and talking to Daikii and Kosuke, most likely about time travel and what not.

 

 

 

“Ahh! No! Get Off! Get OFFFFFF!!!” Krad screamed and yelled until his voice box couldn't take it any longer. “Get OFfFf-epp!” Krad voice had cracked and he was now coughing up a storm because of it.

 

 

 

Towa took her chance, the chance that the Kami had given her, and plunged in. Catching the hacking Hunter off guard Towa was able to succeed. The pink frilly apron was on; her job was done.

 

 

 

“Uh what's going on…?” Dark asked as he set Emiko on the couch and looked on at the bunch.

 

 

 

“Well you see…” Future Dark said in a hesitant tone, looking around nervously.

 

 

 

“Ugh…I hate frilly things.” Krad moaned as he picked at the apron that was currently fastened on him.

 

 

 

“You wore a pink frilly skirt!” Future Dark yelled in disbelief, effectably cutting off any comments coming from the two elder males in the room.

 

 

 

“It wasn't a skirt! And it was salmon!” Krad yelled back blushing bright red, either in anger or embarrassment. (AN: I have had this conversation with a pair of pants. I refused to admit they were pink so I said that they were salmon. It went on for a couple of months…suffice to say…they are pink…but don't tell my conscious that! ^_~)

 

 

 

“Salmon's pink!” Dark yelled back, his eye twitching.

 

 

 

“Is not!” Krad yelled back once again.

 

 

 

“Is too!” Dark growled. “Salmon is so pink.” He added as an after thought.

 

 

 

“It is not!” Krad stated venomously.

 

 

 

“Is too!” Dark continued.

 

 

 

“Is not!” And Krad kept on going.

 

 

 

“Is too!” Dark said in a determined voice.

 

 

 

“We're not starting this again! Shut up both of you and tell me what the hell is going on!” Past Dark shouted, silencing the room and all it occupants looked at him in shock and wonder. Emiko was, needless to say, woken by all the shouting and was looking on it surprise. Daisuke who had been woken up as well was equally shocked. No one had seen Dark act in such a way before. “Sorry it's been rough couple of hours…” Suffice to say that everyone had thought that Dark had finally lost it and would join Krad in the Tenshi's that have turned Psycho Club were quite surprised to hear the apology. Hence everyone in the room fell anime-style. “What? What did I say?” Dark asked the people on the floor in confusion. (AN: And we're getting further and further away from the plot…this is going to be a looooong story…)

 

 

 

“I'm not doing it!” Krad started off the conversation with passionately denying something.

 

 

 

“And what, pray tell, are you not doing?” Past Dark asked and the room went quite once again.

 

 

 

“Well I'll go make some breakfast since everyone's up.” Emiko said only to be stopped sudden by yelling.

 

 

 

“NO!” Future Dark half yelled, half screamed.

 

 

 

“You can't Emiko-sama!” Towa said deeply upset as she ran quickly to cut the mother of the household off.

 

 

 

“Yes! Yes you can! Go now! Before they stop you! Go mother of the Wing Master! Please! GoOoOo! Spare me from the horror.” Krad raved as he pleaded for Emiko to leave and spare him the job that was forcibly placed on him.

 

 

 

“What the hell are you talking about Krad? There's nothing wrong with cooking.” Future Dark said as he grabbed his other half's ponytail and thoroughly dragged him across the room. Cutting off Emiko's comment before it left her mouth. (AN: That seems to happen a lot…)

 

 

 

“There is at 5:00 in the morning! No Damnit! Let Go! Let GO!” Krad screamed as he thrashed about trying to get out of the thief's grasp.

 

 

 

“You're acting like a child.” The leather-clad thief retorted mockingly.

 

 

 

“Me!?!? Who's dragging who!?!?” Krad stated in an angry shocked manner.

 

 

 

“Can we PLEASE get back on track now?” Past Dark asked in a defeated voice as he once again silenced everyone in the room.

 

 

 

“Fine! I'll do it! Just let go of my hair!” Krad said in an annoyed tone, yanking his golden hair out of his other half's hand and stormed into the kitchen. Where he proceeded to make a lot of noise only to stop when the smell of food reached the others' noises. (Now it's only a little noise ^_^) The said others looked at each other in confusion except Towa and Dark who smirked at each other in triumph.

 

 

 

“Ugh…my brain hurts…” Past Dark muttered as he rubbed his forehead.

 

 

 

“Will someone please tell me who is that golden haired man that is now cooking in my kitchen and making wonderful gourmet smells.” Emiko said suddenly that everyone looked at her and stared an unnerving stare. (AN: I'm kinda goofy right now…hehe…)

 

 

 

~:~ Half an Hour Later ~:~

 

 

 

 After a thorough discussion on `what the hell was going on' and with time traveling everyone sat down at the dinner table and enjoyed a nice gourmet breakfast curtsy of our friendly-not-so-friendly-ex-psychotic-demonic-angel.

 

 

 

"Sooo...what was going on earlier?" Dark asked after swallowing his mouthful.

 

 

 

 “Wait Krad? You mean Krad as in the Hunter of the Hikari's? That's the Krad who cooked for us? What-” Emiko asked in shock and looked over to the golden haired man that was ignoring everything around him and was currently playing around with his food.

 

 

 

“Damnit Shut UP! I've been trying to find out what the hell was happening when I walked in for about half a chapter now and I'll be damned if I don't find out now!” Past Dark shouted once again.

 

 

 

“Sorry.” Emiko eeped at the fuming Dark.

 

 

 

“No, I'm sorry. I think its lack of sleep…” Past Dark replied and hung his head.

 

 

 

“Well why don't I clear things up for you.” Future Dark piped up and recapped what had happened in the time they were outside. `Better satisfy him before he flips; this is what you get for holding emotions in. I mean look what happened to Krad, he went and turned into some psychotic homicidal maniac.'

 

 

 

~:~ Flashback ~:~

 

 

 

“Dark your back late, is everything okay?” Kosuke asked in a concerned voice as he noticed the two angels come into the room.

 

 

 

“What are you doing here? Begone Demon!” Daikii yelled as he (threw sutras at the poor unsuspecting youkai, one hitting the kuroi clad ex-villain in the face and thoroughly pissing the victim off <- just kidding that would have happened if DN Angel and Inuyasha merged and Kagome's crazy grandfather had been in the story, BWHAHAHAHA!!! ^_^ You love me! ^_^) stood protectably in front of Kosuke (AN: >_> who's younger???). “Dark what are you doing, hayaku!”

 

 

 

“Jiji calm down, it's okay. Here I'll explain. Krad behave yourself.” Dark replied as he put his hands up in a calming manner.

 

 

 

“Me behave? Me???? Are you seriously talking about me behaving??? Oh you're sooooo full of it.” Krad growled pissed that he was being ignored. “That's it, prepare to-”

 

 

 

“Eya!!! It's you!!!” Towa yelled and squealed at the same time as she came to look at the gorgeous man in front of her.

 

 

 

"Dark. Please tell me that Towa isn't behind me right now." Krad begged to his other half.

 

 

 

"Uh...I can't do that..." Dark answered hesitantly.

 

 

 

"Damnit!" Krad growled in annoyance, closing his eyes in hopes of blocking the image of what was sure to come. "I think I just acquired a new phobia."

 

 

 

"Sorry." Dark said dispassionately.

 

 

 

"What's going on?" Kosuke asked in confusion while his father-in-law just looked on in mild shock.

 

 

 

"Aie!" Towa squealed and jumped onto the tenshi's back, rubbing her face against the silky golden hair.

 

 

 

"Off!" Krad yelled in anger.

 

 

 

"Oi! Towa get off him!" Dark yelled in annoyance.

 

 

 

"Who ARE you gorgeous?!" Towa asked the blonde in black, completely ignoring the thief next to her.

 

 

 

"If I told you I was a psychotic homicidal demonic angel would you let go and leave me alone?" Krad asked hopefully not portraying any of the underlining sarcasm that it was laced with.

 

 

 

"Huh?" Towa replied intelligently.

 

 

 

"Kraaad..." Dark whined dryly.

 

 

 

"What?" The golden seraph responded innocently.

 

 

 

"Nevermind." Sighed the Phantom Thief.

 

 

 

~:~ A few minutes later ~:~

 

 

 

"I got an idea!" Towa shouted out in randomness gaining the attention of Dark, Daikii and Kosuke who were talking about what happened. As well as the wary attention of one golden demonic tenshi that currently had a phobia of Niwa women, whether they just lived in the household or were Niwas by blood.

 

 

 

Towa had previously been detached from a complaining seraph after he explained who he really was and what he would do to the bird woman if she didn't detach herself from him. In reality Domesticated Krad most likely wouldn't have tied her down, plucked her feathers and boiled her alive but it definitely got the message across.

 

 

 

"Krad can cook breakfast for all of us." Towa announced happily.

 

 

 

"Where the hell did you get that idea?" Krad asked incredulously.

 

 

 

"I over heard Dark-sama saying something about you being a great cook when you threatened to boil me alive." The silver haired woman replied energetically.

 

 

 

"I see..." Krad stated annoyed, "I'm not cooking."

 

 

 

"Please?" Towa begged holding her hands up together.

 

 

 

"No." Krad said dryly, closing his eyes to show that he was purposely ignoring her as he leaned against the wall behind him.

 

 

 

"Pretty pwease?" Towa pleaded with her voice gaining a baby tone.

 

 

 

"No." The tamed wild seraph replied disheartening.

 

 

 

"Pretty pretty please?" Towa continued and held up a frilly pink apron, "I even got you an apron."

 

 

 

"N-" Krad started again but opened his eyes and took a look at the said apron, "Absolutely NOT!" He screamed in horror.

 

 

 

~:~ End of Flashback ~:~

 

 

 

"And that's what happened." Future Dark stated as he finished his story.

 

 

 

"And that all happened in the time it took me to pick up Emiko and walk in the house?" Past Dark asked in somewhat shock.

 

 

 

"Yup." Dark's future self responded joyfully fully amused at recapping Krad's horror in the living room.

 

 

 

"Huh." Was all that the Dark from the current time could say.

 

 

 

"Why me?" Krad whined but was thoroughly ignored by everyone in favor of scarffing the rest of the meal down. "See me cook for all of you again..." He muttered in distaste but went back to his plate and continued playing with his food on.