D. N. Angel Fan Fiction ❯ Toki Hanashita Kokoro No Mama Ni ❯ Chapter one ( Chapter 1 )

Toki Hanashita Kokoro No Mama Ni(Letting your heart be set free)

 

By SatoDai

 

Warnings: OOC, Shonen-ai(one-sided?), SatoshixDaisuke, Satoshi's point of view, anime spoilers, events take place after the series; i.e. no Dark or Krad…etc.

 

Disclaimer: I don't own the manga or the anime version…depressingly. Ah well, there's no laws against fanfiction, right? =)

 

A/N: Because I have read the manga and watched the anime, there will be elements of both within my works of fanfiction. It may be confusing to people who have only read the manga, and also to the people who have only seen the anime, but there are some key things I find important from both I wanted to add, and that I enjoy. I apologise for any confusion generated by this piece, and I hope you enjoy it.

 

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Chapter one:

 

I sigh as I watch him from the back of the class. All I can see of him is part of his right shoulder and his fiery-red hair, but I try not to let it bother me. I would like to see more of him, and no, I do not just mean more of his body in this room, but in general as well. I have stopped doing my own work just to stare at him, and though the teacher is talking and expects us to be taking notes, it does not matter.

 

I only bother to come to school because of him, because I want to be closer to him and get to know him well. I lied to him when I told him I wanted to be a normal junior high-schooler, but he probably doesn't know that. I can never be `normal', and neither can he, though he either cannot - or refuses to - recognise it.

 

I grew up as an adopted child whose adoptive-parent became corrupted by my abilities and decided to put them to use for his own ends. Due to this, I have already graduated from high-school; I have even already completed university, and thusly have no need to be here except be closer to him. Even ignoring my Hikari blood, I am not - and will not ever be - normal.

 

He, on the other hand, was raised mainly by his mother and grandfather, being trained day-by-day since he was a child; given dangerous and difficult tasks to complete on his own, without ever being told the purpose until it was too late. He is not normal either; the lifetime of training has easily seen to that and will always be there in the back of his mind to make sure that he never can be.

 

We are two halves of the same whole; his purpose having been to steal various artworks of my ancestors, and my purpose having been to prevent just that. But despite that, we are two halves of that whole by our blood also; the beings that had previously dwelled within our bodies having drawn us together from the start.

 

Taking a break from my thoughts, I focus my attention back onto him; my reason to be here, possibly my reason to exist. I wonder briefly for a moment why he bothered saving me from destroying my body, why he had tears in his eyes and a slight redness in his cheeks when he pinned me to the floor and urged me to live. I frown. His words reduced us both to tears that day, and I am still unsure why he said them in the first place. His voice echoes in my mind…

 

“Don't force yourself to be alone!” Why Niwa…? I've always been alone… Why should it matter now? Why should it…matter…to you?

 

“If you're alive, you can meet that person, somewhere, someday! The person that will be glad that you're alive!” Heh. Like who? Who could possibly be glad I'm alive without wanting to use me or what I have? Certainly not that Harada Risa. All she `liked' me for was the fact that I had my own `Dark' inside me, that I reminded her of him because of your coat that I had been wearing. My own shirt had been burnt and torn from my body, and you offered it to keep me warm.

 

I asked if I could have it…so I could always have a piece of you with me wherever I went, should I need it. Currently I keep it next to my bed…not that you need to know that. It's a symbol of our friendship, proof that the hellish ordeal we both went through was not a simple nightmare…and it is…also a symbol of my promise to you: “I'll try to have fun.”

 

I shake my head. You'll never see how much meeting you has changed me… Outwardly, I probably seem the same, but inside… I'm like a different person…at least, to myself.

 

The bell rings, and for a moment, I do not notice; too wrapped up in my own thoughts for the noise to even register in my mind, and I am left sitting here, staring in the direction of his seat, oblivious to the fact that most people have already left to begin their journeys home, and he-

 

“Hiwatari-kun?” Jerking out of my thoughts, I turn to see him standing there; looking at me with concern, yet a smile is on his face. I feel heat rising in my cheeks, but I refuse to allow myself to go red, especially whilst he is watching me so attentively, and I try to stave off feelings of embarrassment as I begin packing my things away, no longer looking at his face.

 

“Yes Niwa?” Forcing a bit of irritation into my voice, I place all my books into my bag, gritting my teeth as I see a bunch of envelopes in my desk. Love letters. I barely ever notice them on a regular day, despite the fact that they are a great annoyance to me; I get so many that I could probably make them into an art piece that was bigger than this room, but I don't even want them. Unluckily, one falls onto the floor near his feet as he begins to speak.

 

“I was wondering if-” He pauses, and bends to pick it up, giving me enough time to stuff the rest into my bag so he won't see them. Blinking curious eyes as he straightens, Niwa looks at the pink envelope with - possibly a trick of my mind - a downcast expression on his face, though it disappears quickly. His smile is back as he offers it back to me, his movements indicating unease. “You dropped this.” I swiftly take it from the shorter boy's hand, my action seeming so angry it is like I have snatched it, stuffing it into my bag with the rest of the useless things.

 

“What do you want, Niwa?!” I grind out, not having to fake my feelings anymore as I grab my bag and immediately make for the door. He must know what it was, and he'll probably comment on it later and aggravate me further, and I am not in the mood for it. I hear him follow me and a hand grips my bicep, stopping me. My eyes narrow as I look around at him, noting in the back of my mind that the classroom is empty.

 

“I was wondering if you wanted to walk home with me.” He says, with such an innocent manner that I find myself imagining a blush over his cheeks, though I know it is simply a trick of my mind. I cross my arms, raising an eyebrow at the request.

 

“You live on the opposite side of town.” I reply observably, noticing him shift from one foot to the other. “Why would you want to walk home with me? I'm sure your mother has a strict time limit to be back by.” I try not to scoff as I talk of his mother; knowing she dislikes me makes it hard for me not to reciprocate the feeling. Sighing, I see him rub his arm in what could be nervousness - though maybe I am reading biasedly into his actions to see what I want.

 

“I just want to talk to you for a while…” He replies, dodging my jibe towards his mother completely, which amuses me. He does everything that she tells him to, and she either doesn't know that, or takes vicious advantage of the fact, and due to how many notices were sent out when Dark and Krad weren't part of the Black Wings, I am more inclined to suspect the latter. Though he has tried to dodge my question, I will not let it go, and press again.

 

“What about your mother?” When his fist clenches, I think I have hit a nerve. Looking at his face, I see an anger in the red orbs staring straight back at me, wondering for a moment who the anger is really directed at; me or his mother? The anger seems to dull, and I am still watching as he forces a smile.

 

“I guess you're right, Hiwatari-kun.” For a moment, there is silence; I am unsure how to reply to this statement, and am also curious in what he is to say next. “I'll see you tomorrow then, bye.” Pushing past me, he runs off, causing a feeling of guilt to rise in my chest. He only wanted to talk to me - and without even knowing why - I was cruel to him. I can feel my expression soften, and shake my head. I'd better be getting home too; I'm hungry, and unlike him, I have to cook my own dinner. Sighing, I walk down the school corridor, letting myself fall deep into thought again.

 

What did he want to talk to me about? There hasn't really been much to say to him since he saved my life…and kissed that girl… I grit my teeth as I pick up my pace, practically running in the direction of my house, trying to block out that part of my memories. But like Krad, it stays and continues to taunt me. I feel tears building - from anger or sadness, I do not know - and roughly push my glasses up to swipe at my cheeks, glad that where I live is not too far now; it being in plain view. I dash up the stairs and open the door as quickly as I can, slamming it shut behind me lest anyone see me crying.

 

Sinking to my knees, I want to scream, want to be able to transform for the first time, though now it is too late. I want to hurt; I want to hurt others, just to get out this frustration inside me! I give in and throw my head back, yelling as loud as I can, enough to make my throat hurt, and although I do not say words, I feel better, punching the floor in front of me with a fist.

 

I am unaware of how long the process takes, though after I am done, I can feel my throat is sore, and the bottom of my hand is stinging. I am relieved to find the tears have stopped, and get to my feet in silence, the coldness of my apartment finally getting to my overheated, sweaty skin and making me shiver. Running a hand through my hair, I sigh and walk towards my bath - I do not have a `bathroom' in my house as I am the only one who lives here, so it doesn't matter - sitting on the edge and running the hot water. Usually I do not bathe until after I have eaten dinner, but I do not wish to get a cold from the freezing temperature here; I would rather be hungry for longer.

 

Finally, my bath is ready, and as I strip off my clothes and climb in, I frown, resting my head against the edge of the tub and dipping my hands into the hot water. I know now that there's only one thing going to be on my mind for a long time…

 

What did Niwa want to talk to me about?

 

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End of chapter one. Please review! Updates will probably be erratic, as my inspiration is coming and going at the moment, but I will update, I promise.