Death Note Fan Fiction ❯ Brilliance Tarnished ❯ Harder ( Chapter 8 )

Raito made his way back to room 515 on schedule, trying not to feel either hopeful or irritated. If this was going to be a repeat of the last meeting they'd had, he didn't want anything to do with it. L could take care of himself.

 

He stopped in front of the proper door, collected himself, and tapped in the code. If they didn't stop meeting like this, the other task force members were certainly going to wonder what they were up to. The very thought of discovery made him smile, for L would be the one to suffer the discomfort. He let himself into the room somewhat cautiously, knowing that L was here before him this time.

 

The detective was standing at the foot of the bed, poised as if he had been interrupted in the middle of pacing, dark eyes wary. Raito stared back unabashedly, absorbing the sight of the other boy. This was the only place in which he could look at L for as long as he desired, and he planned to take advantage of it.

 

"So," Raito began, trying to take control of the situation, "what's on the agenda for today? Because if you think it's another case of dissatisfaction for me, I'm not participating."

 

L gave him the patented wide-eyed look that gave nothing away, along with a slight smile. "But you don't have any choice, Yagami. That's the crux of it, isn't it? Your mouth is moving uselessly, and I don't care about anything you have to say."

 

Raito inhaled slowly, deeply, trying to calm the firing of his rage. L knew precisely what to say to him to snap his patience and civility, and he could tell that it was going to be one of those encounters. "Get on with it, then. Do whatever you want to do. You're boring me."

 

There was just the slightest tightening in that pale face.

 

Raito maintained his sober expression, but felt mocking laughter trying to bubble up at the reaction. Tit for tat, L.

 

His former captive approached him, pulling something from the pocket of his jeans. Raito felt his brows arch in surprise. "Is that a blindfold, Ryuuzaki? My, my. What are you--"

 

"Shut up," L said harshly, expression fierce. The dark-haired boy reached up and around Raito's head, positioning the blindfold and tying it securely. "You will be quiet."

 

Raito felt his hands roughly jerked behind his back, and tried to pull away when he felt something like cord or rope being rapidly wrapped aroun both wrists. His arms were yanked aggressively, hurting his shoulders, and he allowed his hands to be tied behind his back, gritting his teeth the entire time. "I don't think I need to tell you how I feel about this, Ryuu--"

 

He was shoved without ceremony and had a blind moment of panic as he fell, unable to catch himself. Fortunately, he was positioned to fall on the bed, which he discovered a moment later as he found it face-first, but really. He was going to make L regret ever being born if things went on like this.

 

He found himself being unceremoniously rolled over to expose his face. He opened his mouth to speak again and found another length of cloth forced between his teeth, also to be tied behind his head. Raito was rapidly losing confidence in his ability to twist the situation to his advantage.

 

"Now, you're going to listen to me, for once," L said in a low, angry voice from somewhere above him. "Much as it seems, I know that you are not an idiot when it comes to psychology and the way human beings work. You raped me, which hurt me. You intended to hurt me. As far as I can tell, our entire so-called friendship is just an excuse for you to abuse me. I don't need friends like that. You're a sociopath, and there's no rehabilitation possible. Keeping you alive means expending endless time and energy in keeping you warded and out of trouble. You tell me if you're making it worth my while."

 

There was a pause in the near-tirade, and Raito realized that he was rather amazed at L's outburst. His mind was racing with the attempt to rationalize, analyze. What had brought such a thing on? But the more he considered those angry words, the more he recalled his regrets over hurting his friend, and their last confrontation.

 

I don't know how to stop, Ryuu.

 

"Just what do you think I should do about all of that? I can imagine that you wouldn't be anywhere near as accommodating as I have been. All for the sake of this lie of a friendship." L hit his chest to emphasize his point, startling Raito with the impact.

 

He tilted his head back and made a sound, trying to indicate that he wanted to speak. We are friends. You're the only person I like.

 

Calculate, calculate. What was the best way to get L's affection at this point?

 

"Would you tell me that you were sorry if I allowed it? Or would you give me some other equally meaningless bullshit? Either way, I know it would be a lie." The detective's voice was quiet, tone almost one of disappointment or hurt.

 

Raito felt indignation and regret swell in his chest, but was quickly distracted from it by the unbuttoning of his pants. "I'm going to show you how it feels, Raito," L murmured, leaning in close to his face to speak. He turned his head uselessly towards that voice, looking to be touched. He had found that the other boy withheld such small touches on a regular basis, and it was beginning to disturb him. Both the longing for them and the lack of them.

 

He tried to seem anxious at the prospect of being raped by his former captive, but really, he was utterly willing. But L didn't have to know that. What he really minded was that he couldn't see, couldn't touch, couldn't act. Raito tested the knot at his wrists over and over, imagining he felt some slack, some slippage. If he could wrestle free, he could have the encounter with his companion that he wanted.

 

"Why couldn't you have left things alone? Why did you have to be Kira, Raito?" Was there a bit of anguish in the deepening of that voice?

 

He had barely enough time to ponder that before he was suddenly slapped, startling every thought out of his head.

 

"You are an idiot," L insisted at him, voice vehement and tense with some restrained emotion.

 

Raito felt his pants being dragged off as he fumed over the stinging of his cheek. The dark-haired boy was much more logical when they were arguing. What was going on in that head?

 

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

 

L was disturbed by the fact that he could almost read intent in the movements of Raito's head, the noises he made. It was merciful that he couldn't hear the words, which tended to wind about his mind and confuse him. The slap he had just delivered had been designed to keep that dangerous mind distracted and off-balance. He didn't need for Raito to be assessing the situation.

 

Equally disturbing was how very aroused he was by the sight of Raito restrained. The dark blindfold made the brunet's sensual mouth stand out even more than usual, what with those intense eyes concealed. The gag violated that mouth, keeping those lips parted and incapable of forming words. And slowly stripping the other boy and knowing what he was about to do...made the effects of his preparations all the more powerful.

 

He knew that his former captor wanted to kiss him. Longed for it, in fact. It was part of his joy to deny that. How quaint that Raito loved something as personal as kissing. He filed the knowledge away for later analysis.

 

Raito didn't look terribly distressed by the idea of being raped, aside from a token head toss or two. But he was fairly certain that his friend had never been under another man before, so perhaps it was simply overconfidence. That would fit in very well with the portrait of the boy he knew.

 

L slowly unbuttoned and parted his companion's pressed white dress shirt, revealing the tawny skin of that perfect torso. He found it both intoxicating and nauseating to look upon that physical perfection. It was an affront to his senses, an affront to his self-esteem, and yet...to feel its owner so focused on him was a heady sensation.

 

Raito's body bowed very slightly upward into L's absently stroking hands, and he felt something twist inside of him. "You think you're going to like this, Yagami, but I assure you that you're not." He worked to keep his tone cool and professional.

 

The other boy's face turned blindly towards his voice, and he admired the way the silken hair feathered to either side of that angelic visage. It's ridiculous how beautiful you are, he thought with disgust, and how very rotten. And yet...did he relish that combination of flavors in a human being? Had to, when he couldn't leave Raito alone any more than Raito seemed capable of leaving him alone. Was that truly why he was doing this? Was it really only about vengeance, or was he deceiving himself as he so loathed to do? The thought made an uncomfortable queasiness skip through his stomach, as if his whole world had tilted and slid slightly.

 

There was an attitude of trust in the disposition of the brunet's body, the pliableness of the warmth beneath him. The way that face remained turned towards him, never denying or rejecting his presence. Something else wrenched within him, and he wanted to strike his former captor again. Don't you understand? I'm going to hurt you. Pretending to trust me is not going to earn you any mercy!

 

L's hands clenched in the sheets to either side of his intended victim before moving to at last divest Raito of his boxers, pulling them down slowly and almost reluctantly. Losing control. Just doing this was losing control. His heart was racing, thundering in his throat, and the queer ripples of sensation moving through him just from looking were convincing his body that gravity was malfunctioning.

 

The hands continued as if they weren't his, leaving his companion completely naked and defenseless beneath him. He felt the impulse to put his mouth upon that flesh, to make Raito cry out, to taste, to consume, to become a part of the monster beneath him. He battered the subversive desires away from his nerves, trying to think, trying to focus on how best to torment the other boy.

 

Worst of all was the feeling that the brunet's body was subtly inviting his, calling him. That he would be doing something that was desired, somehow. But since when would the invincible sociopath desire anyone on top but himself? He had to be imagining it.

 

L took a moment to strip off his own clothing, retrieving the remaining items he needed from the pocket of his jeans before tossing the garment aside. Don't think, just do, he admonished himself sternly, trying to quiet the fingers that trembled about the lubricant he had brought.

 

"I'm not going to make this easy for you, any more than you did for me," L said harshly as he lubricated his fingers, moving to close with Raito's body. There was a sharp intake of breath when he slowly pushed into that previously untouched place, easing his finger in as deeply as it would go before slowly withdrawing it and repeating the motion. He found himself hypnotized by watchinig the expressions that fluttered across Raito's face like shadows, the apparently involuntary movements of head and mouth. He experimented then by thrusting his finger into the other boy's heat, and was gratified when his former captor gasped, back arching.

 

He decided to only go up to two fingers before entering, seeing as how Raito was already very excited and not having too much difficulty with the situation. He definitely wanted to make it at least somewhat uncomfortable, somewhat painful. After a few patient minutes of preparation, he took the final step, carefully putting on a condom - and found that he was also quite excited. He dismissed the irritation from his mind in favor of focusing on his target, who was panting by this point.

 

L canted Raito's hips up to greet his entry, orienting himself and easing into his counterpart's tight heat at a measured pace. The brunet was moaning, torso twisting and arching, but hips remaining stationary, failing to complicate L's entry. Was that deliberate? Did that sick fool truly want him to do this? His suspicion grew. Anger spiked through his brain, and he thrust the rest of the way in, caution be damned.

 

The action earned him an immediate response in the form of a loud cry from Raito, whose teeth clenched down on the gag after the outburst. A low moaning continued, however, and he felt some concern that perhaps he had injured his false friend. But wasn't it too late to change the plan? He continued thrusting, guilt melting his anger, pleasure corrupting his logic. It felt...so...good. Was this how Raito felt inside of him? The very thought of the brunet inside of him made him bite his lip in disturbance and longing.

 

Raito was gasping open-mouthed now, no longer attempting to control anything. Perspiration was a faint, crystalline sheen upon his fine skin, making his body glow in the room's dim light.

 

I want to melt into that, came fuzzily through his disorganized mind, as if it were someone else's thought.

 

L leaned in, closing the distance between their bodies as he began to move more urgently, more purposefully. He buried his face in the damp, heated skin of Raito's neck, inhaling the scent of him like something necessary to sustaining life. The moaning of his companion vibrated against his cheek, reassuring him as all logical thought and higher faculties fled the rising tide of his arousal and pleasure. He was gasping in air as if he couldn't breathe, surely very loud in the ear so close to his lips. Thoughtlessly, he turned his face slightly to take that small bit of flesh into his mouth, to taste it and stroke it with his tongue as their bodies moved together in perfect synchronization.

 

Raito reacted even more, sounding desperate and close to meltdown. That silken, sensuous voice always seemed to act as an aphrodisiac, no matter what sounds it made. L plunged home one last time, pleasure cresting the critical point, and the other boy's body clenched around his, violently and repeatedly. As hands found his back, fingernails rending his flesh, he thought dimly that he'd like to record the sounds that were coming out of...Raito's...

 

A cold wash went through his mind as the haze of release began to recede, as his logic returned. Hands. On his back. RAITO'S unbound hands on his back. As he lay there atop the brunet, frozen, those very free hands began a slow, leisurely tracing of his back, sending shivering tendrils of enjoyment through the skin.

 

One hand left his back to drag the gag down, freeing that poisonous mouth. But it did not immediately speak. Instead, the head turned, neck straining slightly, and lips pressed a gentle kiss upon his temple, his cheek. Waited.

 

What did this mean? L felt panicked, looking at those lips, the free hands. How long had Raito been free? What did his former captor intend?

 

"Aren't you going to kiss me after all that?" Raito murmured with a faint smile, voice slightly roughened.

 

"Pleasing you was not part of any plan," L retorted, still staring at sensual, reddened lips. Wanting them, wanting to bruise them and bite them.

 

GOD, what was wrong with him, and what was with the wild impulses?

 

He felt a creeping warmth towards the sociopath whose body he was still cradled in. Chased it away. Felt it return. Chased it away again, but it was like syrup, oozing in around the corners and sticking. Stupid.

 

"Please," Raito asked quietly.

 

L felt shock thrum through him, unable to recall ever hearing such a word from his adversary. "Why? You already received one thing that you desired. I had no plans to please you, and yet you went and made a mess all over us. Why should I give you anything else that you want?" His voice sounded cold to him. Irritated.

 

The brunet was silent for a long, somber moment before speaking. "Why can't we both enjoy these encounters, Ryuuzaki? Our bodies are rather well-suited to each other."

 

"Is it just something physical, Raito? You wouldn't ask me for anything else, I hope." He made sure that his voice was jabbing, rejecting, when in fact...he was testing.

 

Another silence. "I ask you for no more than we've already had, Ryuuzaki. Besides," cue the slide into arrogance and an ego the size of the planet sidling up to him, "I should think that this arrangement would be of more benefit to you than me, since you have trouble with this sort of intimacy."

 

"Do you want the kiss or not?" L snapped. "Kisses will be reserved for rewarding good behavior."

 

"What am I, a dog?" Raito tossed back. "I'm already doing what you demand of me."

 

 

____

 

 

Raito ground his teeth in frustration and humiliation as he waited for L's reply. This affection was harder to set up and win than he had anticipated, and it stung his pride like acid. L, surely sensing something, was hammering nails into each extension of Raito's goodwill, brutally squashing every affection-seeking probe.

 

It stung more than his pride, somewhere, somehow, but he couldn't quite tap down the feeling. It was very unpleasant, whatever it was, and it made him feel somewhat helpless, which he despised. Being pinned under L and restrained had not done that, but having his overtures rejected and slapped down did.

 

This is why I kidnapped you and made you my prisoner, Raito thought narrowly, reaching to pull the blindfold down.

 

A hand stayed his. "Not if you want the kiss," L warned.

 

He ceased his attempt to regain his sight, also peripherally aware of the fact that aside from their damp bodies remaining pressed together, L was still sheathed within him, and was not altogether...flaccid. He contemplated complaining about it, but kept his mouth shut in favor of getting the kiss. Which peeved him to no end, this asking, this waiting, these conditional clauses for what he wanted.

 

Suddenly, he felt breath upon his lips, and his train of thought derailed completely, his attention narrowing painfully to that one stimulus. Lips finally touched his, their surface slightly rough, and he waited eagerly, trying not to surge up and claim that mouth the way he so desperately wanted to. He felt L's tongue lightly graze the inner curve of his upper lip as their mouths began to mesh, began to seal.

 

GOD, god, god, god, GOD, he thought in a frenzy, struggling with himself as he waited obediently for L's tongue to find his. When it did, it was like a shortened, wetter version of the sex they had just had, and it affected him too much. Raito embraced the other boy's offering as much as was possible, kissing back fervently, arms tightening around the body that still rested atop his. His tongue naturally sought to pin L's, sought to force the kiss back into the detective's mouth so that he could violate it and take control.

 

Why was he so hungry for this body, this contact? It was assuredly a weakness. It didn't make any sense. No matter what victories he managed to wrest from the detective, he always ended up needing more.

 

L suddenly pulled back, breaking their kiss without any warning. "That's enough," the dark-haired boy murmured, sounding slightly unsteady.

 

Raito pulled off the blindfold, eyes seeking those of his recent partner. L looked shell-shocked and flushed, which pleased him. The cessation was not for a lack of desire, then. "Would you like to cuddle?" he asked sarcastically.

 

His friend blinked rapidly, withdrawing, and seemed embarrassed that he had still been inside of Raito. A blush crept over that pallid face. "I think we should get back to work. You don't appear traumatized. In fact, I think you enjoyed this." Those dark eyes stabbed at him, the blush rapidly fading.

 

"It didn't really hurt," he admitted somewhat distractedly, fascinated by the blush phenomenon. "Is it wrong that I enjoy sex with you, whatever the form? That I like to touch you and be touched by you?"

 

"It's just sex, and it can be done with anyone," L replied flatly, avoiding his gaze.

 

Now was his moment. "Frankly, Ryuu, I wasn't happy about what you said earlier. About how our relationship should only be physical. What if I want more than that?" He knew that he both looked and sounded as earnest as spring sunshine.

 

L had finished cleaning up, and paused in the act of stooping to retrieve his clothing, favoring Raito with a wary, wide-eyed look. "What are you talking about?"

 

"I want to be with you. A...couple. To tell you the truth, I feel...I only feel complete when you're close to me." Yes, that sounded good.

 

"Absolutely not," L responded arcticly, eyes narrowing slightly. "Do you take me for an imbecile?"

 

"What? What's the problem?" he protested, remaining sprawled across the bed and therefore nonthreatening. "We already have sex. We usually get along well enough. Why not?"

 

"I do not intend to keep having sex with you!" L exclaimed, raising his voice. "You're a criminal and a sociopath! If I were ever inclined to consider anyone for such a position, it would not be you. It would never be you, contrary to your elevated opinion of yourself!" There was real passion in the detective's stance, in his face and voice.

 

What an interesting reaction, L. This will take more time than I thought.

 

A quiet knock sounded at the door, and L froze as if he'd been caught vandalizing government property. "Yes, Watari?" L called out politely.

 

"Sir, I have some very important news for you. May I come in?"

 

Stark panic stamped itself across the typically inexpressive features. "NO, no, Watari, I will be out in a moment. Please return to the operations room and I will be along shortly."

 

Raito smirked, half-inclined to call out something, anything awkward. But it would be against his best interests in the long run, so he restrained himself. He was the dirty secret, no doubt about that. It might be something he could utilize later to undermine L.

 

"Stop lounging and get dressed," the detective said shortly, sparing only a lingering glance for Raito's nude body.

 

Ah, but still. Lingering. "Ryuuzaki. If it bothers you that much, I'm certain that you can find other ways to punish me." And in good faith, he might even bear with it once. Because he had come to feel that he owed the dark-haired boy some recompense for the suffering he had caused him.

 

"Is that an invitation?" L muttered with a slight indentation of the brows - the minimalist version of an ordinary person's scowl.

 

"Yes, but I am also your captive, am I not? You can do whatever you'd like with me."

 

"Indeed, as you did with me. Now stop talking and dress."

 

Raito complied, keeping his smile to himself. The soreness was negligible, and he hadn't minded the reversal of roles as much as he'd thought he would.

 

In a way, he was still the one in control. He pulled and L moved in ways he desired. Not always perfectly, but still.

 

Eventually, he always pulled what he wanted out of the detective, and made the two of them crash together.

 

 

 

---------

 

 

L made haste back to the room they used for headquarters, forcing Raito to rush with him. He did not care what anyone would think at the moment if both of them returned together, only that Watari would interrupt him for nothing less than an emergency. Everything that had just passed with the other boy churned at the back of his current thoughts, queued to be dealt with and thoroughly analyzed later. He dismissed the encounter from his thoughts and quickly punched the code in at the door. As he entered, Raito's lurking presence followed, that awareness causing a brief wash of heat over the skin of his back, and the remembered sensation of nails biting into his skin.

 

Matsuda leapt to his feet as soon as he saw them. "You won't believe it, L! Misa-Misa was murdered at home by some crazy guy!" On a second glance at Raito, Matsuda clapped his hands over his mouth, seeming to realize that he had just dropped terrible news upon someone who was Misa's supposed boyfriend. "Oh, geez, Raito-kun, I'm so sorry!"

 

L slowly turned his head to look at Raito. The brunet looked frozen, shocked, but he half imagined he could hear wild laughter inside of that shell of reaction. He could almost see that hateful, leering grin. You did this somehow, didn't you, Raito?! When could you possibly have...! He felt betrayed in his intimacy with the other boy, never mind that it was supposed to have been a punishment.

 

Raito staggered to a nearby chair, collapsing into it. "My Misa is...is gone?" Raito gasped out, turning lost eyes upon the collectively helpless task force. No one would meet those burnt amber eyes.

 

"I'm so sorry," L said woodenly, fuming inside at the deception and the immaculate acting.

 

"Ryuuzaki!" Raito cried, surging to his feet and into L's arms.

 

L cringed, arms out to his sides, unsure of what to do with a clinging, faux-traumatized Raito. It was terribly embarrassing to publicly be this close to the person he had just had sex with. He felt the act was written all over his face, every inch of his skin. He only hoped that such wasn't the case and that he was merely being paranoid.

 

"For goodness' sake, L, comfort the poor guy!" Matsuda blurted out, coming towards them. The idiot held his arms out for the transfer of a distraught Raito, obviously assuming that L would want to be quit of the burden.

 

And he had every intention of pushing the rottenness away from him and into those eager arms, except...his own arms had come up around Raito while he wasn't looking, and they wouldn't release him to Matsuda. Possessiveness. "I think he needs those close to him right now, Matsuda-san, but I'm sure your concern is appreciated. I will return later."

 

He steered his former captor towards the door, and was met by Watari. "Sir," the older man said quietly, below the hearing of those farther away, "is all...well?" That sharp gaze raked over Raito, who was attached to him much like a leech.

 

"Enough," he replied vaguely, moving around the older man.

 

He would eventually have to say something to Watari. But first...he had to find out what was going on, then interrogate the cold-hearted devil he held so closely.

 

As they left the room and he dragged Raito down the hall back to room 515, he fully expected a loosening of the other boy's arm where it was wrapped about his body, but no such thing happened. The brunet kept his head down, acting distraught, clinging tightly to L the entire time. He peered intently through the gaps in those bangs, knowing it was all a lie, but amazed by how convincing the act was.

 

He punched in the code for the door as they arrived, and cautioned Raito in a low voice, "You and I will be discussing this very shortly."

 

His former captor's head lifted, and those hypnotic eyes gave him a look that seemed...not unhappy, but disquieted.

 

"Stay there," he instructed, giving Raito a slight push to force him into the room. That accomplished, he quickly shut the door and walked down the hall a ways, glancing back repeatedly to keep the door within his sight. He went as far away as was possible while still being able to monitor the door, then pulled out the cell phone that Raito had recently returned to him. He stared at it for a moment, holding it awkwardly between two fingers as was his habit, and felt that it had become contaminated with Raito's essence. With that thought, he opened it and dialed Watari, putting the phone up to his ear and allowing it to touch his face.

 

"Yes, sir," Watari answered.

 

"Tell me what happened," he said shortly.

 

"Apparently, sir, two men broke into Misa Amane's residence early this morning, but at slightly different times. The first man successfully gained entry only minutes before the second man, but the former died of a heart attack before he could attack Ms. Amane. The second man shot her to death, then escaped. The police located and arrested him shortly thereafter, and they say he claims that he found Ms. Amane's personal information on the internet. He stalked her for years, and says that he recently decided to kill her for failing to answer the letters he sent to her through her company. He believes that God intervened and allowed him to find that information on the internet."

 

"The first died of a heart attack?" L asked, thinking of the Rem shinigami that Raito had mentioned previously.

 

"Yes, sir."

 

"The odds that two men inclined to murder would see that information and act upon it at the same time are..." He felt a chill clench around his heart. When did you do it, you bastard? When did you defy me, when did you circumvent my rules?

 

"Affirmative, sir. Profoundly unlikely. An extremely wild coincidence." Watari sounded as if he were waiting for a certain response.

 

"That sounds like a...Death Note 'coincidence', does it not, Watari? But I have had a certain person under surveillance the entire time, which should have prevented access."

 

"Sir." A delicate pause. "If I may be so forward, I must say that I am not certain that you should be the one to maintain surveillance upon this person any longer."

 

L felt his fingers tighten their grip upon the phone. "What do you mean, Watari?" he asked coldly. "Do you feel that my skills are lacking?"

 

A brief silence. "That is not what I was implying, sir. I have known you for a very long time, and recently, when it involves that person, you are not the young man I know. I think that perhaps you are losing your objectivity where this person is concerned, and that you should consider breaking contact. It may be wise to designate someone else to perform this task."

 

Not to see Raito? Someone else capable of keeping tabs on his sociopath? There was no way. A feeling akin to panic swarmed through his body when he thought of seeing the other boy only infrequently, or possibly never again. And Raito, being Raito, would surely set out to charm his new watcher, and that person would assuredly not be as clever nor as skilled as himself. A bored Raito was a very dangerous Raito. "Absolutely not," he replied firmly, jaw clenching. "No one else is capable of keeping that person out of trouble, Watari, and I think you know that."

 

"But, sir...please forgive me, but you're being drawn into his--"

 

"I am well aware of his tricks, and I remain objective!" L exclaimed in a low, intense voice, irritation pinging his nerves. Despite his sincerity, a voice in the back of his mind whispered, Liar. Liar.

 

I can do this, he argued back, shoulders tensing as he waited for Watari's response.

 

"I disagree," Watari responded solemnly.

 

"I am an adult, Watari, and I don't want to hear another word about this."

 

"I'm sure you are, sir, but I hope that you aren't considering a relation--"

 

"That's enough," he murmured, flipping the phone closed and dropping it into his pocket. His face felt hot, and his temper was certainly raised. He would have to wait a moment before facing Raito again.

 

Why couldn't Watari simply mind his own business? How much did the man know? He sincerely hoped that it was very little. Even though he had recently taken all of the cameras and microphones out of room 515, he still worried that he would slip and allow Watari access to something. He was not such a fool that he did not expect his almost-father to go poking about in the video records. Even though L took care to quickly erase anything questionable from the recordings, there was always the chance that he would be careless at some point.

 

Feeling relatively calm again, he made his way back to the room and let himself in. His gaze glanced off of the rumpled bed and found Raito sitting in one of the chairs. L dragged the other chair around to face the brunet, sitting down in it and drawing his feet up. He began the questioning in a conversational tone. "Misa Amane is dead, and it looks quite like the work of the Death Note. The first man died of a heart attack, the second man successfully shot Misa, but was captured fairly quickly. Convenient, isn't it?"

 

Raito's expression was halfway between pure innocence and somberness, lending it greater authenticity. "It is rather a coincidence."

 

"Raito," he intoned, leaning forward. "When did you use a Death Note? And when are you going to give them to me? I'm quite certain that you have both yours and Misa's, after all. I firmly instructed you not to kill, did I not?"

 

The other boy's jaw set with stubbornness, but his expression remained the same. "Yes, you did. And I can't give you anything yet, as I explained earlier." The tone shifted to petulance, the expression sharpening. "Unless you want me dead? If so, it doesn't matter. I'm likely going to die by Ryuk's hand. Rem would have killed me had she not been distracted and forced to make a self-destructive choice. Would you rather that have happened, Ryuuzaki? If you wanted me dead, you should have attacked me a little more forcefully with that knife. Did you notice the scar you left when you were taking advantage of me earlier? Did you?"

 

"Stop it," he replied irritably, perceiving what Raito was doing but unable to bar the guilt that crept in. "You deserved more than that for your treatment of me. You're so self-righteous, so damned arrogant and conceited."

 

"Oohh, and you wouldn't know what that was like, would you, oh great detective?" the brunet mocked him, chin tilting up in challenge as those dark amber eyes glinted at him.

 

"Yagami, I do believe you're forgetting who is in control here," he shot back coldly.

 

"Am I?" his former captor murmured, brows arching provocatively.

 

Alarms went off in L's mind, warning him that he had to take action immediately. He left the chair, looming over Raito. "Yes, you are. I hold your life in my hands." Anxiety began to build within him at the necessary confrontation. Never, ever a good action to be forced into, this challenging and confronting of Raito.

 

The other boy's expression softened queerly, even though the mocking smirk remained. "What are you waiting for, Ryuu? Threats are no good if you can't carry them out. What are you saying? That you'll kill me after working so hard to preserve me?"

 

L froze, seeing in that face the neutralization of his power, his control. If Raito knew that he wouldn't kill him, he no longer had any way to handle his companion.

 

Like light shifting, Raito's expression warped into Kira's, triumphant and predatory. "I don't believe that you'll do anything to me." Bold as brass, those eyes stared up into his.

 

He couldn't retreat. He couldn't kill the other boy. His blood froze, despite the fact that his mind was screaming, racing for a solution, a counter-move.

 

Slowly, Raito rose from his chair, L's proximity making it a very intimate, face-to-face encounter. The devil leaned forward as if to kiss him, but whispered against his lips, "I know what you want." Those eyes never left his.

 

"You don't...know...anything," he replied woodenly, overly distracted by the sensation of their lips brushing repeatedly as he formed the sounds necessary for speech.

 

Those lethal eyes gazed into his point-blank for another moment or two, amused and warm, but never losing their predatory quality. With that, Raito drew back, relaxing. "I'm sure you're right. I'm being overconfident, my dear Ryuuzaki, and you'd no doubt kill me in a heartbeat if it suited you. Isn't that right?" Those eyes cut to him, mocking and sly. Cuing him.

 

"Yes. Yes, I would," he replied firmly, feeling thoroughly undermined and exposed. The crisis had been averted by Raito's choice, not his. The other boy had just informed him quite eloquently that Raito was the one in control, not himself. "You are not to use the Death Note anymore. I am quite emphatic about that, so don't misstep again."

 

"So you would have preferred to have Rem successfully kill me instead?" Raito asked softly, gaze somber.

 

Sincere or not? L hesitated. "Yes," he lied, returning that gaze frankly.

 

Those serious eyes flickered, eyelids coming down just the slightest bit before the eyes were averted. "Of course," Raito murmured flatly, smiling just a little.

 

Something crumpled in L's chest, painfully compressed, and he found himself leaning in to brush his lips over the corner of the brunet's mouth in a fleeting kiss. "Yes," he said more softly against his former captor's face. As he withdrew, he was aware of those eyes considering him with just a hint of surprise flashing in their depths.

 

 

 

----------------------------

 

 

Raito couldn't help but stare when L acted so strangely. He had just been trying to reconcile the unpleasant falling sensation within him in response to that 'yes' when it was tempered by an appended kiss. There had been something strange in the detective's abyssal eyes with the delivery of that kiss, something that had been shuttered and sealed away as soon as he recognized it.

 

He shouldn't have pushed so hard. He knew that. Panicking L was not going to get him what he desired, even if it entertained him. So a retreat had been in order. Yet he hadn't expected that 'yes' to his death, and it had affected him unnecessarily and unpleasantly. That was what had begun the entire episode - feeling that L would not care about his death. He'd had to know. Couldn't leave it alone, although he knew that 'yes' only made sense.

 

He had felt the need to show L just how helpless he was, just how much control Raito himself had. Even when you're in my body, you're under my control, he thought smugly. He had only wanted to rub the detective's face in it, had only wanted to force his friend to give in to him. But apparently, he would have to continue with his circuitous route in order to do so.

 

Raito turned his attention back to the dark eyes that were silently watching him. "Ryuuzaki."

 

"Yes?" Wariness.

 

"Did you consider what I asked earlier?" He smiled engagingly at the dark-haired boy.

 

"No?" L prompted, expression blank.

 

"About...more. I mean it, Ryuu. No one could ever be as close to me as you are." As he said the words, he realized that he believed them, and his mind recycled for him the sound of L whispering his name into his ear in passion. How he had savored the tenor of it, the emotional information carried in that whisper. A relationship with L wouldn't be all sham, as he would obtain something desirable out of it, too. Tying his adoring friend to him, endless entertainment with said friend, and access to lots of kissing and the best sex he'd ever had...definite advantages. The adoring part needed work, but...he had begun to want the relationship and all it promised. L could be the fool with the feelings involved, and Raito himself would receive ample compensation.

 

L shifted, looking slightly discomfited. "Raito." A brief pause, no doubt cursing the slip of familiar name usage. "We've already covered this. There's no call for it. The reason for relationships is emotion, usually love or infatuation, and neither one of us is capable of such. I also do not plan to continue having sexual relations with you, so...I really see no point in such a production. There's no benefit to either one of us."

 

"You don't like the sex?" Raito prompted, not believing it for a moment.

 

L glanced at him out of the corner of one dark eye, scuffing at the floor with a bare foot. "Hm. It's not bad, but it's also unnecessary. I could easily do without it."

 

"Oh, really?" he replied casually, trying not to mock or smirk.

 

"Yes, really. As a matter-of-fact, I think it safe to say that we're done with that. It's an insufficient means of punishment and behavioral modification, so it's useless."

 

"I see," Raito replied calmly. But he had to wonder...was L truly serious? Could the other boy go without having sex with him in any way for the duration? He found that impossible to believe, what with those dark eyes becoming more and more voracious when they were fixed upon him. Something he was doing was working.

 

Blank eyes assessed his reaction. "Will Yagami be able to cope with that? We wouldn't want anyone else at risk to be raped."

 

He narrowed his eyes at L. "No, you're the only person I enjoyed raping, Ryuuzaki. Everyone else will always be willing."

 

The detective recoiled slightly, expression tensing with a repressed flinch. "How...pleasant for them."

 

Raito glanced down at his fingernails thoughtfully. "For being raped, you certainly came rather quickly that night."

 

This time, there was an obvious flinch that he was able to catch in his peripheral vision, as well as a step back. "You're...disgusting. Sick. I should probably have you in solitary confinement." Tremulous tone. Intensity. Slight breathlessness.

 

He smiled as he lifted his eyes to that pale, tense face, meeting the angry eyes. "I'm sick? I only did what you wanted. What you lacked the courage to offer independently, I took for you."

 

L looked positively incensed now, with no attempt to blank it. The dark-haired boy turned without a word and left the room, slamming the door. After a moment, a faint beep sounded and a locking bolt shot home.

 

My, my, so I'm being confined. Raito felt disappointment at his lack of self-restraint, but more than that, concern that he was going to be terribly bored while waiting for L to give in. For he had no doubt that L would be back.