Death Note Fan Fiction ❯ PITCH ❯ Caught Between an A and a Hard Place ( Chapter 16 )

PITCH

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Light x L

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Part 16

 

L is a reclusive detective who takes his job seriously. Too seriously, in fact. Once he takes note of how neglected and stagnant his life truly is, he decides to make some changes. Challenges arise through an unanticipated meeting. AU

 

A/N: An update! Woot!

Also, managed to write most of the next chapter. Yay! XD

Disclaimer: (See part 1 for full disclaimer.)

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Pitch: (def.) 

A substance commonly utilized to bind materials in construction... Tar pitch appears solid, and can be shattered with a hard impact, but it is actually fluid. Pitch flows at room temperature, but extremely slowly. To attain maximum fluidity, to be used, it must be exposed to heat.

 

Minds are like pitch. To reveal their full potential, they must be exposed to environs that apply stress. They must be challenged.

 

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Part 16: (Caught Between an A and a Hard Place)

Raito looked up at the darkness of his bedroom ceiling.

He hadn't planned things to go this way - hadn't meant for any of it to happen, really.

Aiber.

Lawliet.

Circumstance and the lack of options forced him to play his hand in the only reasonable way.

He closed his eyes again, a soft, harried sigh escaping his lips.

All of his carefully laid plans were shifting, contorting.... losing the shape he had so painstakingly crafted for them.

So much was now out of his immediate control that it inspired a feeling much like a phantom hand enclosing his chest and squeezing... wringing his lungs and heart and cracking his ribs... so much so that he wanted to act out, wildly seize back any control that was there to be had, if only to still that crushing grip.

He'd nearly eliminated Aiber, a thing that would have been sure to put his world back to some sort of stasis. Fucking Aiber who had complicated things immeasurably.

He could still see the grotesque silhouette, the macabre vestiges of that scene in his mind's eye - the contours of the foreigner exploiting the mouth of the dark-haired énigme he'd wanted for his own.

Jealousy did not suit him.

Neither did this broiling anger, or uncertainty.

It made him act too rashly, too regrettably.

He could remember it - the feel Lawliet's smooth skin beneath his fingers...

...his long, pale neck, beautiful and vulnerable beneath his questing hands...

He'd surrounded that column with the embrace of his palms... felt the shudder beneath them...

He'd felt those dark eyes on him, watching him. Always watching him, as if he were the world's greatest monster and only that opaque, obsidian gaze could shackle him.

Raito's eyes opened, sliding to the space next to him where Lawliet's seemingly lifeless body lay like a broken toy.

Ambient light caught in the twisted tangle of his unruly black hair.

The curve of a pale cheek lay obscured and perfect beneath it.

Raito brushed jagged bangs aside, taken with the stillness in that face.

No more running, now that I've clipped your wings...

He smiled then, in the dark, an expression of the melancholy satisfaction which had taken to ghosting over him.

Forgive me, Lawliet.

He leaned in, brushing his lips against the cool skin of the detective's cheekbone.

But now... now there were other things to attend to.

He slipped out of bed.

---

The sound of a phone broke the silence of the pre-dawn stillness.

It was an obtrusive sound, jarring, unrepentant in its insistence.

Raito answered it, and it was this that gradually dragged L from a sleep so deep that he could hardly, in this moment, believe he was prone to insomnia.

The cadences of that voice were soothing, rhythmic... and yet they also held something of a discordant quality which sat within L's chest like a smoldering weight.

The prospect of seeing the brunet, who was just in the other room, of talking to him... set off a discomfiting set of feelings within him. The brunet's face, so beautiful that it was nearly painful... the silken tone of his voice... the way his eyes could look as warm as fire or as cold as the dark side of the moon...

And above all of that, the way Raito had him so off-kilter.

L sat up and shook his mussed hair out of his eyes.

Why had he succumbed yet again? At the time, it had seemed like his own idea, but he knew now that it was not. Now, in the chill of early morning, he was alone to analyze the happenings between them with greater clarity.

Only, all he could see was the drowning passion of amber-rouge eyes as Raito claimed his lips, his body, leaving him helpless.

Helpless... and fluttering against the thrill that surged through his very being.

"Ugh," L groaned softly into his waiting hands.

Eddies of pleasure still rippled and sparked with even the briefest remembrance of their joining, making him feel awkward, disjointed, and fragmented.

"Awake now?"

L jumped as Raito's cultured voice flooded him. It was too immediate, too close, sounding like it originated within his own body, rather than from the doorway.

"I should think that's apparent."

Raito scoffed at him eloquently and pushed off from the door frame he had been leaning on. "Your voice is so cold, Lawliet." Measured steps brought him to the side of the bed. A hand beneath L's chin forced their eyes to meet. Amusement lurked in amber depths. "Where is the passion you held only a few short hours ago?"

"Don't mock me," L said stiffly, hating the teasing. He pushed Raito's hand away.

"I'm only playing," Raito said in an indulgent voice, his dismissed hand finding a place upon the side of L's neck. It caressed the skin, warm and safe... and dangerous.

L's eyes closed, his brow furrowing. Where had that feeling of progress gone? That certainty that they were moving forward and solidifying whatever this strange bond between them was?

"You're upset about something..." Raito said, too definitively to be a question, though there was something of an upward lilt to the words. "Last night." He paused. "Does it bother you, afterwards, the idea of making love instead of sating lust?"

L whipped dark eyes towards the source of his agitation, a frown upon his face.

Love.

Lust.

Once more, Raito had gotten too close and oxygen seemed scarcer than it had before.

Always, he says these things that...!

Raito's bold, brazen words that only served to ruffle L's calm and convince him that the brunet sought to make him uncomfortable only to take amusement in it.

"Is it making love, as you called it last night," L asked, "if love is not even involved?"

His nerves jangled. He didn't really want to hear the answer, nor pursue this particular conversation at all, but at the same time he couldn't let it be.

Instead of answering him, Raito's mouth descended on his, kissing him so sweetly that it was excruciating. It was a hot poker in L's chest as lips softly parted his in a facsimile of the sort of kiss one might expect from one professing love.

The promise of it, and the harsh contrast of the absence of such a promise was too much.

L couldn't help that he had somehow had love form in his previously untested heart. But why with Raito? Why for Raito? He couldn't even trust the brunet, and at any given time was not able to guess the thoughts circling that humbling mind.

Distress and frustration stabbed through L and he pushed Raito away. "Answer my question the normal way."

Raito's eyes were elusive, like an animal's. There was an uncanny stillness about him as he said, "You don't trust me at all, do you?"

"This isn't about trust!"

Raito was still eyeing him, picking him apart, dissecting him in the small span of moments before he spoke again. "Oh, but it is. Maybe you just don't recognize it." He paused, then held a hand out. "Come with me."

L eyed him back, twisting the sheets that covered him from the waist down in fidgeting hands. "Where?"

"Come."

Again, there was no room in Raito's demands for trivial details. No concern for specifics, explanations, or even clothes for that matter.

It grated upon L's sensibilities to take that perfect hand - to let himself be led.

Ok, so maybe it is about trust....

Raito kept his eyes from exploiting L's nakedness, purposely making it almost an inconsequential thing merely by not acknowledging it, and led him out of the room without comment.

L's heart constricted in his chest as Raito stopped in front of the locked room.

Raito's gaze drifted back to settle on L's face.

"After you," he said.

"What? But you keep it lo--"

Raito gave the door a gentle tap and it began to swing inwards.

L's eyes followed the movement, riveted. It was opening. The puzzlebox that Raito had kept so secret, so safe. And what might await him inside? What did it mean for Raito to put this before him?

"A display of trust," Raito said cryptically, "to earn yours."

L looked up at him as he spoke, and Raito's eyes had that foreign quality to them - the one that made him seem closed off and nearly lacking of any human qualities. That disturbing visage, so like the one L had seen earlier tonight to the accompaniment of readying guns. It put him on edge.

---

Raito stared back.

Lawliet was surprising him. He'd rather expected the detective to disappear into the room the moment he'd been given clearance.

Some part of him, while he'd declared his belief in the other man's innocence in the matter of the break-in, had wondered how much of that innocence was a mere technicality. Hadn't the dark eyes before him quickened with interest at the closeted mystery of this off-limits room? How stridently had the detective fought against his curiosity? How close had he come to violating his home with the likes of Aiber? Had it been a last minute decision? Had it been Aiber's timing that had thrown it all off - that Lawliet was already indisposed, strong-armed into an engagement at the Yagami household?

But here Lawliet was.... standing at the edge of the room as if it were a precipice.

"Go on," Raito said again.

"I don't think you really want me to, Raito."

It was a solemn gaze that met his own.

"Perhaps," the detective said, "It is your own trust you wish to procure and not my own."

It was possibly a truer statement than Raito liked to admit. A display of trust? Certainly his actions could be seen as such, but it was also a test. Not one with a specific, desired outcome, merely one that he felt like administering. Just to see what would happen.

And Lawliet's reaction was unanticipated.

Within his large, black eyes, the covert shine of intrigue was held in check. He sensed... something, and was waiting on Raito to make it clear through some minute detail.

That Lawliet made no move forward made a sentiment much like respect increase within Raito, though the impudence of the other man's failure to comply to his direction irritated him.

Raito was on edge.

His secrets lay just beyond, and even opening this door in the presence of another was akin to sacrilege. He treasured his secrets. Fiercely. He would do almost anything to protect them. And that was why he needed Lawliet to step inside.

---

L was quite torn.

Alarms were going off in his head in reaction to standing here and refusing the temptation before him. However, they also responded in a cacophony of disapproval to the idea of actually going within the room.

Both seemed like such very bad ideas.

So then, which was worse?

It was a difficult decision. A dilemma, as it were, the two courses of action seemed so evenly matched.... so L decided upon one in the clearest fashion he could manage.

"Alright," he said to Raito.

Curiosity had become the deciding factor.

In lieu of there being any 'right' choice to be made, he could at least satisfy his inquisitive mind.

L turned back towards the room, probing the darkness beyond the illuminated frame and door, making out objects that might well be furniture in the small strip of gloom. It seemed an organized space. Nothing haphazard or out of place...

He reached out to push the door further inwards, exposing more of the room to his eyes. Neat. Almost neurotically so. He stepped forward, his gaze flicking across every corner and object, the feel of the room enclosing around him.

One could surmise that Raito was either not in the habit of heavily using this room (it had a nearly untouched, museum-like quality) or he had recently tidied the space prior to this viewing.

There was a heavy, formidable-looking desk against the wall. A pair of bookcases took up the corners of the room, filled with thick-spined volumes that were likely reference sets, among other things, along with a few chairs that were plush, high-backed and similar to the sort of seating one would find in an 19th-century European study. All it was missing was a fireplace.

The window, in what one might call the reading corner, was covered with a thick curtain that would block most light and any overly ambitious eyes from the outside.

L itched to explore the desk, with its wide drawers that boasted space enough for hanging files. What might one discover within its depths? Or beyond, in the closet to the left of it? A closet that was gaping, half open, in a beckoning fashion...

It pulled L to it, promising a more disordered trove of secrets. Stacks and shapes of things that were askew - not perfectly glossed over in the habit of the rest of the room - were visible. For this, he could overlook the desk with its tauntingly keyed drawers.

---

Raito slid the deadbolt in the room's door home with the turn of his key.

As expected, it was the closet that drew the detective in - the disorder amongst order that caught at him so.

Lawliet's entire body language had changed subtly as he caught sight of it. His slim frame, so appealingly long-limbed and on the verge of graceful, had it not been for his amazingly poor posture, had become straighter and nearly authoritative in its bearing.

His attention was solely focused on the yawning darkness of the closet, and not Raito who was moving towards him.

---

In the back of his mind, L thought he registered the metallic click of a deadbolt. He had not, however, heard the sound of a door opening and closing, so he assumed that Raito remained in the room. He almost had his goal in hand, a disorderly stack that was utterly compelling for some reason. His fingertips stretched to reach it.

Odd, though, that Raito would lock the door when they were in here....

But it would be odder still if he had locked L inside, alone.

Which he hadn't... but L had also noted the soft jingle of keys. Now why would Raito have a double-sided deadbolt on the door in the first place?

A hand slid down L's back, just as he'd levered up onto his toes a bit and secured his hold on the edges of the square-edged stack. From the back of his neck, down to the curve of his backside, the lascivious touch reminded him suddenly of his forgotten lack of clothing and made him lose his hold, spilling his prize to the floor.

Like confetti, ink-marked cardboard coasters scattered at his feet. So very familiar now as recognition punched through his gut.

"So," Raito's voice whispered into his ear from over his shoulder, his clothes brushing L's bare skin, "what are you going to do now?"

The coasters mocked him from their lowly resting place, as did the lies they represented.

L's jaw clenched, and his entire body stiffened. Now, perhaps, the locked door was making sense. "What did you expect I would do?"

"Oh, I expect that you will become filled with righteous indignation..." Fingertips skimmed the immobilized, hanging weight of his arm, bringing L's entire focus to it - to the unsolicited, wrongful contact. L needed a moment to sort this out... to process and re-analyze everything that had happened up until now - everything that had been said - in light of this new information.

Snippets of conversation flickered through his mind and before his eyes, as the severe form of Raito's presence lay behind him like a steel wall, his hands as incapacitating as steel cuffs with their faint touches.

But for what reason would he expose this to me?

Why would he put this within my reach? It only compromises his standing.....

Unless that is what he wanted? To show me he'd been lying all this time. But is it merely to gloat that he'd put such a thing past me? Or...

"Why did you show me this room?" L asked flatly, staring straight ahead, but not seeing what was in front of him.

"I've told you that already," came Raito's voice with that strangeness in it. That dark, dragging, dangerous sort of tone, colored with a slight, unfeeling smile.

"Trust? Am I supposed to believe that entirely, when you have already been through here, arranging things to your liking?" Words were hard to deliver here. Each one must be chosen with utmost care. The brunet's insidious hands were still, anticipatory, waiting. "You say it is a display of trust, yet it is exactly the opposite when you have had to take such preparations... working as I slept to create this..."

"Are you so certain of that, Lawliet?" Raito spoke against his ear, his hair brushing L's cheek. "When all you have is your conjecture?" He might have been looking over L's shoulder, sharing some distant view on the horizon. His voice lowered, sounding pointed and mockingly amused at the same time as he continued, "Do you know for certain that I am not merely meticulous to this degree in all things?"

L ran possible responses through his head. He disliked the instability of all of this greatly. The situation, Raito himself, and the very near future all seemed too chaotic. One of the larger problems being his initial assessment of the brunet, which the coasters had smeared across his eyes until that was all he could see. All he could see through.

He'd wondered if Raito was a sociopath, been certain of it although he had not determined whether he was truly dangerous, or had any violent tendencies in the least. But now there were a myriad of seemingly inconsequential things that clamored to the surface, demanding his attention. So many little things that made him wonder. What was Raito's true face? What things had he done, and was the evidence of such things within this room? It was, wasn't it?

"It's too clean. Too sterile," L said finally.

Was Raito trying to expose everything about himself, trusting L to dig deep and find it? Or was he trying to hide in plain view?

Were the coasters meant as a slap in the face and the means by which L's dubious belief in Raito might meet its ruinous end? Or were they merely a prelude to something more?

"You've brought me inside, and you're hiding," L continued as Raito's arm looped around his neck and draped over his shoulders, keeping him close. He fought the tension in his body, and ignored the tension in that slender, muscled limb.

"A bit at a time," Raito said in a voice barely above a whisper, "I'll show you myself. But I wonder if you can handle it?"

"I wonder if you'll let me," L responded, just as softly.

A long pause. "Are we at an impasse?"

L rolled it all around in his head, a firestorm of details, the things he guessed at, the things he thought he knew, and the maddening questions that plagued him. Above all was the tie of emotion that bound him to the brunet even against sense and reason.

It was a peculiar and unfamiliar thing... and it made him want to pursue the truth, though he was gritting his teeth, and he knew that he was going to dig down as far as he had to in order to find it. Answers were more important than anything else, and he was willing to weather whatever it was, if only to rip back these false layers that were smothering him, these masks that the brunet was wearing and his grand deceptions.

An impasse? "That is merely a potentiality," L said. He pointed to the ground. "What do you mean by showing me these?"

"Can't you guess?" Raito's voice held a cruel smile.

"You want me to see what a liar you can be? You want me to have no faith or trust in you? You want me to see how disturbing you are?"

The arm at L's throat tightened, tense. "Is that what you see?"

"Is that what you want me to see?" L tossed back. "Actually saying what you mean does wonders for communication."

The arm slid from L like a serpent, and he found himself turned to face the brunet as he was pushed back against the wall.

Held at arm's length, he met the odd stare of the other man. Neither of them blinked as their gazes clashed and wrestled with silent transmissions.

"Give me something to work with," L said stubbornly. "You can't plan everything ahead and account for every potential outcome. If you insist on that, you'll fail."

"It's worked just fine for years." 

"Yes, and maybe I'm different. Maybe your carefully laid plans just won't work with me."

Raito's lips twisted, and L was ready for the lash of sharp words that the brunet seemed to deal out when he felt compromised. "High opinion of yourself, Lawliet?"

"Have things progressed as you imagined, Raito? Are your usual methods making things go as you like?"

"Of course," Raito snapped, hands falling from L's shoulders. They both knew it was a lie.

"Why then do you feel as if you are not in control? That wasn't a lie, was it?"

"Dammit," Raito said, turning away. "Sometimes I swear I hate you."

"You chose me because you thought I'd be able to see you," L pressed. "Didn't you?" Raito's back was rigid. "Yet you don't want to be seen; it makes you angry, because being seen means you are no longer in absolute control."

"Stop talking," Raito said in a quiet voice.

"Only if you start."

The brunet's fists clenched at his sides and released after a long moment. "What would you do if I left you in here?"

For a little while, or forever? That was the question. L remained silent, sensing more words on the brunet's lips.

"Without clothing, without your cell phone...."

The intimidation irritated L, partially because he wouldn't put it past Raito to do such a thing. "Before or after I turned this room upside-down and found out everything there was to know about you?"

"After."

"I suppose I'd use the computer that is so conveniently upon the desk over there to indicate my location and extricate myself from the room. Unfortunately for you, it would not cast a flattering shine to your reputation that I would need such help in order to leave your residence."

"Is that all?"

"I would be pissed off, of course, and I can't say that I wouldn't make you pay for it."

Raito turned with an intake of breath, his eyes containing a slight shine that was incalculable. "And nowhere within that time would you attempt to do as Aiber was planning? Even had I intended to leave you in here to expire, the laptop's presence being an oversight?"

"You don't make such oversights."

Raito looked like he was rolling that thought around in his mind, and the edge he'd held faded back until he was the calm, in-control person he'd always appeared to be. "True."

"Has breakfast occurred to you?" L asked.

"Yes, but it seemed unimportant at the time."

"Would you mind if we made it a priority for the moment?"

Raito looked at him skeptically. "Not clothing first? I'm shocked."

"My stomach is growling." L paused. "Though pants would be nice."

A pensive look crossed Raito's face, even as his hand disappeared into his pocket to fish out the door's key. "How do you really feel, that I kept those?"

"The coasters?"

Raito nodded slightly.

L chewed lightly at his lip and considered. "Either I'm becoming immune to some of your eccentricities, or I've decided it isn't as big of a deal as it seemed previously."

The events of last night had probably shell-shocked him enough that he wouldn't retain his standard reactions to things for some time. He owed Raito for the prison scare, but that could come later. Actually, what the coasters were shown to him for, he believed now, was an attempt of the brunet's to come clean. It was a test of sorts, to see what he would do - how he would handle it - and to see if he could be trusted with something more. 'Bit by bit.' Raito was no fool, nor one given to whole-hearted trust. He was testing to see what it was safe for him to entrust L with, and some statements were made solely to gauge how easily he spooked.

Whatever his reasons, his methods still suck.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Raito said, faintly teasing. His playfulness was starting to come back, an indication that the tension was beginning to break.

"For survival, or for state of mind?" L returned.

"Mmn. Point taken." Raito unlocked the door and waved L through.

Once more, the brunet was not taking obvious note of his nudity, in what seemed like a gesture of consideration.

Briefly, L thought upon the curiousness of Raito's use of sexuality to distract and cover up many of his secrets and keep people from getting close, as well as the moments where he had dropped all such tactics altogether. In the bathroom last night, for one. Maybe that had been what made it all seem so excruciatingly real and honest - that the brunet had abstained from such standard behaviors. And now was the same. It lent a quality of seriousness and gravity to everything.

Raito was not attempting to obscure anything, and so it stood to reason, this was the face he showed at his most honest....the unnerving self that liked to impose fear as the method of control, or the angry self that lashed out. It was a sign of insecurity at being so exposed and without artifice, perhaps.

L waited as Raito locked the door again behind them. "Was that a one-time only invitation, or might I have a more leisurely tour later on?"

Raito half-frowned at him. "I guess we'll see."

"You know, secrets are bad for relationships."

Raito scoffed at him as he made his way to the bedroom. "And since when are you an expert?"

"I could say that you're making me into one."

"You could say that, but then again, you aren't abiding by your own 'expert' advice." Raito found a pair of pants he deemed acceptable and tossed them to L to put on.

Raito took that moment to stare at L unabashedly and make him overly aware of his lack of clothing again as he tried to dress. L cursed the brunet's ability to make him so self-conscious. "You think I should have told you about Aiber's intentions."

"Yes," Raito responded without hesitation, giving him a look that said 'What are you, stupid?' "For possessing such intellect, you're incredibly adept at making it seem absent."

L glared at him (and such a look was much more effective when one wasn't feeling a breeze on one's nether regions). "How would I have even broached the subject with you? You're as paranoid as I am, and I dare say moreso. Would you not have just suspected me as being a willing accomplice? Or if he hadn't tried to go through with it after all, what would that make you think of me then?"

"I don't know, but you still should have told me."

"...I did try."

"Not nearly hard enough."

L crossed his arms over his chest, a frown turning down the edges of his mouth. "You have more to say. Go on and get it all out now."

Raito gave him a withering look. "Even if he hadn't gone through with it, it would have been nice to at least be prepared for that eventuality."

"Well, I was half hoping you didn't really have much to hide."

 "And in that case, you thought you might offend me with a warning?"

"Sort of..." L admitted. "But maybe I'll just risk your indignation in the future. The alternative, in which I was given the opportunity to become acquainted with the inside of a prison, was hardly more acceptable." Yes, it was a jab. A completely and utterly justified one at that, if L were to express his opinion on it.

"Are you still angry about that?" the brunet queried loftily as if the very notion of it was beyond passé.

"Wouldn't you be?" L snapped, employing the 'What, are you stupid?' look himself this time.

Raito shrugged, infuriatingly dodging the question (which probably meant he would have been incensed in L's place), and said, "So, breakfast?"

"Why don't you cook something? In penance for making me sit in an interrogation room, tied to a chair, and with a sack on my head?"

Raito tilted his head consideringly and consulted the clock. "Hmn. Not enough time. We have work in under an hour."

Now L had progressed to a 'What the hell?' look. "Come again?"

"Work," Raito reiterated. "It's Monday."

"It was the 'we' part I was having trouble with, actually."

"Didn't I tell you?" Raito smiled. "You start today."

"Raito..." L said, a look of utmost disdain on his face, "In all seriousness, I think I hate you."

"Fantastic," Raito said with just enough misplaced enthusiasm that it tweaked L's nerves, before pressing a kiss upon his lips. "We can swing by your place for some clothing that will actually fit you."

L grumbled. "Just what are you trying to say?"

"That you're gorgeous," Raito said as he headed for the kitchen, "but most certainly do not work out like I do."

"You know," L said indignantly, "there is a time and a place for sarcasm..."

"Have you ever seen the inside of a gym?" the brunet asked.

"I have."

L withstood the weight of Raito's skepticism and raised eyebrow for a full 30 seconds before adding, "Though I wasn't actually there to use it."

"Then I wasn't being sarcastic, was I?"

"It was more about the other part, actual--"

"Here, cereal," Raito cut him off, placing a bowl in his hands.

L accepted it and took a bite, a pensive look on his face as he chewed. "Watari is not going to like this."

---

Indeed, Watari (Lawliet's... caretaker? ...supervisor? Raito still wasn't sure which) did not, in fact, like anything about it - least of all Raito himself.

The older man had looked upon him in surprise when he answered the door to find Raito there.

Lawliet, meanwhile, had had a minor altercation with the door locks in his car. It was amusing to hear him spluttering in muffled tones in the cage of the vehicle as he wrestled out of the seat belt and fought to reverse the child safety locks and release himself from the car before Raito could reach the front door. He'd foolishly thought that Raito would wait outside while he changed, thereby avoiding the older man with the white mustache who was currently viewing Raito's proffered hand with distaste.

And maybe that would have been slightly more pleasant, Raito mused as Lawliet scrambled up to them, a little ruffled around the edges.

The detective composed himself only seconds after skidding to a halt, just long enough to meet Raito's curious (and innocent) look with a baleful glare, smoothing his visage into the blank slate he often liked to cover everything up with.

It seemed he was anxious.

Not that Raito couldn't see why. Watari seemed peeved and the fact that he nearly had to look over Raito's shoulder in order to see Lawliet probably wasn't helping.

A thin hand rested briefly on Raito's upper arm as Lawliet squeezed past him to face the older man squarely.

"Where have you been?" Watari asked, his white brows rising in consternation.

Raito, though he felt the urge to respond to that question, kept silent. He knew it wouldn't be appreciated if he interfered any more than he had. Lawliet was an independent creature. If he pushed too hard, or attempted to control too much, he'd get his hand bitten off.

"Later, Watari. Right now I have an appointment to get to."

"You also have clients that have been trying unsuccessfully to reach you."

Lawliet's face adopted a sour look, and Raito was more than happy to sit back and watch such things when they were not being directed at him. "Are you trying to tell me that I am unable to be away from work for even part of a day? And it's the weekend! Can they not leave a message?"

"It ceased being the weekend 9 hours ago," Watari pointed out.

"God help them if I tried to take a vacation."

The older man's expression shifted into one of perplexed concern. "A vacation? From what? What would you do with yourself?"

"Go to the beach?" Raito suggested with a straight face, unable to help making the joke. Twin glares dismissed his statement with brute force.

"Quillish?" a feminine voice called out from inside the house.

Moments later, Celia appeared in the doorway, a confused look on her face as she viewed them all on the stoop. "What are you all doing out here?"

"I have an appointment," Lawliet said. "And I would like to change my attire."

"Goodness, dear," Celia chided, herding Watari to the side. "Go on and get what you need then. Come in, come in." She then proceeded to thoroughly cow the older man, with a look and a few hushed words, which Raito took great amusement in.

Even better, Raito thought, was when she turned to him to make polite conversation while he waited. He turned on his charm full blast, winning her over easily and digging the British man's grave, one smile at a time.

---

With a little effort, Raito had managed to convince the detective that it really was necessary to come to work with him, which was not a lie. It sounded like one, he'd admit, but having Lawliet on retainer was a strategic move of the utmost importance and he needed him to be there. Also, Raito wanted him there.

Raito felt he was doing surprisingly well on so little sleep and no coffee. Maybe that was the key - sleeping less made it easier to get up? But it was probably just the tension of the last many hours that had enabled him to rouse himself from unconsciousness even sooner than the insomniac he'd come to need more than sleep.

He'd decided on a whim to let Lawliet into the room, but he couldn't stand to leave it perfectly as it was. He'd awoken and gone straight to arranging it in a fashion he found to be acceptable - just as the detective had later accused him of.

It was no error in judgment to reveal the existence of the coasters first, and gauge his companion's reaction to that. Other things could come later, and only if Raito deemed that it was safe to do so. There were certainly some questionable things in his past, and he wanted to make deadly sure that Lawliet could be trusted not to divulge a single thing - no matter what his personal feelings might be. It was imperative.

The problem was if the detective would not cooperate with such a plan. If he declined the sort of relationship Raito would require, one that was close, binding, and sworn to secrecy - the only sort Raito would be able to have if he were to let someone in, behind the masks and into the reality of his true self. Yes, Lawliet declining such a thing would be quite a problem, because Raito had already decided that it had to be him. It had to be Lawliet, and no one else would do.

It made him just a touch crazy to realize that.

Just a touch insane to realize that.

So, he decided that if Lawliet did not seem inclined or amenable, he would train the dark-haired intellectual into it. It was the only option, after all.

Maybe that seemed maladjusted of him.

Maybe.

But he didn't really give a shit how it came off, just as long as Lawliet could be what he needed.

It was infuriating, having someone be able to see him so clearly - Lawliet was right. Infuriating. Exhilarating. Half of him thrilled to it, while the other half was inclined to wring the detective's slender neck.

---

L rushed up the stairs, determined not to leave Raito and Watari in each other's presence for too long. The brunet had that look, and it seemed it was perfectly acceptable to him to make things as uncomfortable as possible. L had also caught the beginnings of a brilliant, glimmering smile aimed at Watari's female companion, and it did not take a genius to see how that scenario would play out.

Though if Raito did manage to win her over, perhaps she would talk Watari into being a little more reasonable regarding the two of them spending time in each other's acquaintance.

L unbuttoned his rumpled black shirt and tossed it onto the floor.

Of course, Raito might merely be doing his best to irritate Watari into submission and make him a solid enemy... out of some misplaced sense of justice, most likely. Watari had been rather dismissive and had made plain that he did not approve of the brunet in any way, shape, or form.

L located a dark grey, cable-knit pullover that had flecks of lighter and darker colors in it and a pair of black silk denim pants. It was almost like wearing normal jeans, only the sheen they possessed made them look fancy and so they could be worn in less casual environments. It was the sales rep's pitch, anyway, when struggling to appeal to L's unconventional tastes. But they were comfortable, so he didn't care.

Pulling them up over his hips, he mulled over the brunet.

He tried not to think of Raito as a time bomb waiting to explode... he really did try.

However, experience displayed the his quick-minded companion's propensity for drama and the unexpected. Experience dictated that steely nerves were needed if one were to coexist with The Brunet Of The Dazzling Smile.

He pulled the knit sweater over his head, calculating the minutes he'd been away, then finger-combed his unruly spiked hair into some semblance of order.

Yes, he did in fact own a brush. But the brush and his hair were mortal enemies, and he was often caught in the crossfire. He didn't feel up to the task at the moment, nor did he have the luxury of time.

As he descended the stairs, he caught Raito's sidelong glance and also noted that Watari had been watching for him expectantly.

"L, a moment?" Watari asked before he'd even made it to the landing.

"Ah..." This promised to be both cumbersome and unavoidable. "Certainly," he acquiesced reluctantly.

Raito was watching him, he knew, as they detoured into the kitchen - he could feel the brunet's gaze upon his back, burning a hole through his shirt and into his flesh.

Maybe I should take the leading statement...? L wondered as they turned the corner. Would that give me better standing? More control? Perhaps. "About Raito," he began dubiously.

Watari waved him off. "You're a grown man. You can make your own mistakes as you see fit."

"Mistakes?" L cut in. "What gives you the ability or the right to judge my acquaintance to be such?"

"You've been all over the place the last several weeks," Watari said directly. "How many qualifications do I need to be able to point out what anyone can see - that he's a bad influence on you? You haven't been acting like yourself at all, you've been keeping strange hours, dressing abnormally, for you, and you've been negligent in your work."

"Some of that is completely unrelated to Raito. You'd have known that if you'd bothered to ask."

Watari waved him off again and it was irritating. "I've seen his type before. I know where this sort of thing leads, and I just wanted to give you fair warning." He fixed L with his pale gaze. "And you should be aware that it is likely something more than friendship that he wants from you."

"Based on what?" L asked, surprised that Watari would say such a thing, and that the older man was apparently concerned for his virtue.

"There are signs. I wouldn't expect you to be aware of them, but they are there."

L wasn't really sure what to say. Of course, such talk was sorely outdated at this stage, but Watari couldn't have known that. "I'll keep that in mind. Was there anything else?"

Watari sighed. "Yes. Have you been in communication with Aiber recently?"

BAM! Several of L's neural synapses imploded in an effect largely like congestive heart failure. "Why do you ask?" he delayed, trying to collect himself after the unexpected question. Now he felt jumpy and his palms were sweating a little. Last he knew, Aiber was supposedly in police custody. He still wasn't entirely sold on that, and dwelling upon it put him on edge. He needed to speak with Raito again on this matter, and he needed to verify the other detective's status.

"Well, as much as Sakizawa likes to flip-flop between agencies, apparently he tried to contact Aiber Sunday evening and has yet to receive a response. He said it was unusual not to be able to get in touch with him at all, and remembered hearing that you and Aiber sometimes work together, so he asked if we could check into it."

"He wants us to help him contact our competition for him?"

The older man's mustache drooped. "It is poor etiquette, I agree. But that has always been characteristic of him, has it not?"

L rubbed his hand through unruly jags of dark hair. "That's true." Yes, he definitely needed to talk to Raito before doing anything of consequence.

"Doesn't it seem strange for him to drop out of touch now of all times? He was so recently making a nuisance of himself."

"I'll try to contact him, and will let you know if I am successful."

Watari nodded, and L was able to excuse himself from the kitchen.

Raito's eyes marked him immediately. "Finished?"

"I believe so."

Was that one of the signs Watari was talking about? The way Raito's amber eyes trailed his movements, tracking him like a predator? But it was often so subtle that even he didn't notice the brunet doing it. Was it the way their body language sometimes came to mimic one another's? A hand smoothing down the front of a shirt or resting hooked in a pants' pocket? The tilt of a head? The identical expressions they often wore when in agreement on something, apparent when they shared a glance?

Or, ye gods, could it be the way that just now after taking his arm to hurry him along, Raito looked tempted to ply him with an impromptu kiss?!

Don't do it.

He tried to pull his arm back, but Raito's grip was absolute. Like losing one's balance in slow motion, so did it seem that the brunet was coming recklessly closer at great speed while also seeming to take an eternity. And Raito's face bore that petulant, entitled look, shot through with irritation. It often accompanied attempts to get his way.

L scrunched his eyes shut, unable to watch this unfold - wishing that the front door was already between them and the room's other occupants.

He felt the displacement of air as Raito drew close.

"Part of you wants me to, you know," Raito whispered into his ear. "And don't you think it might be easier if everyone knew?"

"Not now," L whispered back.

"When then?" Raito persisted in a silky tone. "When it's even more obvious that you're letting me violate you?"

L felt his face flush instantly at such words, and cursed the brunet vehemently for being able to accomplish it, despite his efforts to ward it off.

"A kiss seems a much more chaste and refined way of doing things, doesn't it?"

L glanced quickly over his shoulder to verify what he was already certain of. "Perhaps, but it's no longer necessary, thanks to you." Celia and Watari had both seen the embarrassment of the blush that Raito had raised on his cheeks. There wasn't much room for interpretation what with Raito standing so close and speaking into his ear like this.

Raito could really be a bastard sometimes.

"Don't worry, Lawliet," Raito said as he pulled back, in a voice that would be easily overheard as he began leading him towards the door, "I know Misa's flattery can be a bit over the top, but even she is given to behaving herself in more... official venues."

L blinked. Raito was actually taking pains to smooth this out? His statement was entirely misleading... more applicable to the brunet than to himself, but...

"Um, excuse me," Celia spoke up. "But that wouldn't happen to be Miss Amane Misa, would it?"

Raito turned, a delighted smile brightening his face as he said, "Do you know her?"

L fought the urge to roll his eyes at the impeccable performance.

"Oh! Now that you mention it," she said, "I thought you looked familiar! I've seen the two of you on television before. But I must admit I thought you were a couple?"

"Once upon a time," Raito said dramatically. "We've since gone our separate ways, though we continue to work closely. She's no longer single, but I have to say she has her eyes on our organization's new detective already." Raito gave L's arm a boisterous little shake. "Amazing, isn't he?"

L wanted to smack his hand over his face.

"New detective?" Watari asked, pinning L with a very stern look.

"It's only temporary," L said, hoping that it was.

"Oh, but Quillish, did you hear what he said?" Celia said with excitement. "Our little L is catching the eye of people like Miss Amane!"

'Our little L'? L raised a brow at Watari. What, so now I'm being adopted?

Watari shrugged helplessly, and Celia danced up to L and pinched his cheek affectionately, tickled pink at the misleading statements Raito had fed her.

"I'm afraid that if we do not leave now, we'll be dreadfully late," Raito said, his voice playing regret like a fine violin. "I'll be sure to give Misa your regards." To Watari, he said, "Good seeing you again." He spoke in a pleasant voice just brimming with congeniality.

Steering L once more by the arm, they gained the door. Raito gave them a small wave before closing it behind them, then tilted L's face up by the chin.

"Don't say I never do anything for you," he murmured, pupils dilating as he claimed the other's mouth as he had been wanting to do.

____________________________________________________________

TBC