Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ *~The TAD Fics~* ❯ The Tad Truth about 4Kids ( Chapter 11 )

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Pokemon or any show or person I may have mentioned in the stupid on scene sub plots…also I apologize to 4kids, I know your not really lead by Satan and his boyfriend saddam but sometimes you guys ask for things like this…please don't sue me I'm poor, very very poor! This isn't meant to insult you in ANY way I'm just having fun…how come I have a feeling my next fic could be titled "A tad what not to write about in a tad fic if ya don't wanna get sued" lol

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Whoo-hooo finally the 11th Tad fic makes it to my computer and the Internet YAY! YAY! (*Dances around*) Okay this is based on that silly little backwards message video as found on www.TeamRocket-video.com where James apparently says "4kids are the devil" Whether it's fake, true, a coincidence, the voice actors having fun or 4kids are really after our souls I don't care…I just wrote a silly fic about it ^_^ Enjoy! By the way I'm in it and I'm known as "The author"

THE TAD TRUTH ABOUT 4KIDS

By Togepi

Today we start our wonderful tad fic with the main Pokémon characters as they sit out in a dark deep forest reading over their latest dub version of the Pokémon script from 4kids...but someone isn't too happy with it.

"THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!" yelled James as he stood up from the group holding his script tightly in his hand. "I WANT TO WEAR A PINK DRESS NOT A GREEN ONE!"

"Oh sit down..." moaned Misty.

"No I will NOT, I'm gonna complain to 4kids about this!!!!" With that he began to stop off into the forest but was stopped by Jesse's voice.

"4kids can't do anything it's up to the Japanese animators what colour your dress is"

"So..." moaned James. "...they can at least dub something about the dress, like that hideous broach"

Just then meowth screamed as he held his script as far in front of him as he could.

"ARRGGGHHHH! I can't read dis ting, it's all blurred out Japanese!!!!"

"Hey your right..." added on Jesse.

"Can I have a look?" asked Tracey as he peered over Misty's shoulder but she immediately shut it.

"Get your own!" she snapped, then Tracey sulked, which made Pikachu laugh, which made Togepi shoot some passers-by with his bazooka, which made Ash scream, which made Brock hit on some trees, which made Misty cry...

"What's sketch boy doing here anyway?" asked a very peeved Togepi. "He isn't even IN this episode!"

"Yeah!..." sneered Misty. "He comes in when we send Bulbasaur over to professor oak to stop Muk and Heracross from humping...er...I mean...er..." Misty went bright red and stopped talking there as everyone looked at her; luckily her future husband bailed her out...without even realizing it.

"WOAH! What's THAT Pokémon!"? Ash gasped as he pointed Dexter at...his script.

"This is your script..." Dexter replied. "..and if I had hands I'd give you a very fatal paper cut with it!"

"Cool!" cried Ash happily. "I'm gonna catch it!"

With that he pulled out a Pokéball and threw it at his script of course the script didn't go in the Pokéball but the young trainer still picked up the ball and started prancing about happily.

"I caught a Pokémon! I caught a Pokémon!"

"Oh dear..." sighed Misty. "...he's lost what sanity he had left!"

"Ash had sanity?" asked Brock surprised.

"HEY!" snapped James. "Have you forgotten the whole point of this story?"

"Oh yeah..." replied Jesse. "...have fun complaining!"

With that James left the group, mumbling things about them under his breath as he walked towards the 4kids HQ.

Meanwhile in the Team Rocket HQ Giovanni had his head resting on his desk holding a glass of red wine in one hand and sobbing loudly. Sat on the floor beside him was his Persian that just sighed and rolled his eyes, this was gonna be one of THOSE days.

As he sobbed Domino was passing the door to his office that was slightly open. So she slowly walked in and up to his desk.

"Er...sir...?"

"I thought it loved me...I really did think it loved me..."

"It?"

Domino looked at her boss then at the Persian sat on the floor, the cat just sighed and reluctantly told Domino what was going on.

"IT is a lamppost..."

Domino's eyes went wide as she heard this.

"Lamppost...right....?"

"He was dating it up 'til about 5 minutes ago when he spotted it making out with the toaster..."

"Riiiight....?" Domino looked uneasily at her boss then began to back off. "Well when I'm ready to be included in twisted fanfics about the boss of Team rocket dating a lamppost I'll give you a call..."

She was about to run off when Giovanni grabbed her arm, she sighed as he looked up at her.

"Your preeeettty right...?" he slurred.

"Well DUH!" replied Domino.

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

Domino had to think about this....for about a mino-second!

"Sure!" she replied. With that Giovanni jumped on her knocking her to the floor. Perisan's eyes just shot wide open.

"Oh no!" he said to himself. "For the love of god NO! NO! NO!"

With that he bounded towards the door to Giovanni's office but a passing rocket shut it without looking in just before Persian reached it. The cat began to try and reach the door handle but it was no good.

"NO! PLEASE GOD! NO!" he screamed as he banged hard on the door. "NOT AGAIN! NOT AGGAIINNNNNNN!!!!!"

Then he heard Giovanni's voice....

"Come on Persian you have a part in this too...."

"NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" screamed Persian as Giovanni dragged him away from the door by his tail. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!"

Meanwhile James had reached the 4kids HQ and was now making his way up the dark corridor to the office of the boss of 4kids.

"I'm a big brave dog! I'm a big brave dog! I'm a big brave dog..." he muttered to himself while shaking with fear. He then swallowed hard as he got to the office door and he knocked on it.

"Erm....sir?"

There was no answer so he knocked again.

"Sir...I've got...something to say..."

Again...nothing, so this time James tried the door and it opened, so he went inside. He quickly creeped up to the desk and looked at the papers on it, since no one was around he picked them up and began reading it.

"Monday..." he began. "...dance recital...Tuesday....eat wife's liver...Wednesday..." he stopped and gasped. "...steal James' favourite ballerina outfit...hey, that's not fair...I like that one!" He then continued. " Thursday...steal the souls of all Pokémon fans...fri..." he then stopped again and looked back at the last one. "...wait a minute...steal the souls of all Pokémon fans?...That doesn't sound good!"

"That's right..." cried an evil voice from somewhere in the room, James looked around but couldn't see anybody.

"Who's there...?"

"It is I..." the chair behind the desk then turned around to reveal...

"Saddam Hussein Arrggghh..." screamed James. He tried to run to the door but it was closed by none other than....

"Satan arrgggghhhh!"

With that James tried to jump through the glass window but bounced straight off it and landed back on the floor of the office.

"Curse you double glazing..." he scowled. "...CURSE YOU!!!!!!" he then looked at saddam and Satan again and squealed. "Please leave me alone I'll do anything!"

"Even sing lucky lucky in just your underwear!" said saddam. James just sighed.

"If I must!"

"Then get squealing PIGGY!!!!"

James sighed again as he started taking his trousers off.

Well while James is doing that we'll cut back to the others who are still in the forest.

"Now bayleaf...sit!" Ash commanded his overgrown weed of a Pokémon, Bayleaf sat straight away. "...now stay!" Ash began to walk away repeating his command, but as soon as Ash stopped walking it bounded towards him.

"No bayleaf I said stay STAY!!!!"

"BAYYYY-LEEEEEEEAF!!!!"

Bayleaf jumped high in the air and Ash just stood there. Quickly misty grabbed her crush and pulled him out of the way but unfortunately or more fortunately Tracey was also in the way of bayleaf, he looked up at the giant grapefruit he was snacking on and saw the giant grass Pokémon above him.

"uh-oh..." was all he managed to say before Bayleaf landed on him.

*splat*

"Oh no! Bayleaf killed Tracey..." gasped Misty, she then shrugged. "Oh well...."

"Oh well! OH WELL!!!!" snapped togepi. "I was gonna test out my new state of the art laser gun on him and now he's dead! Which means I'll have to test it out on one of YOU!!!!"

He pointed the gun to various members of the group, as he did Jesse walked up to him and nudged him slightly with her foot which was enough to make the evil egg fall over and roll down the hill.

"DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!!!!" he shouted as he rolled away from them.

Back in the 4kids HQ....James is stood on top of a table singing in only his underwear.

"...Lucky Lucky nice to Mewtwo,

Since the day when we bumped across each other

Happy Happy I'm so Peppy

A feeling as strong as anger!..."

"DANCE MORE PIGGY!!!!" squealed saddam, but James stopped and climbed off the table.

"That's it...can I go now?"

Just then a very familiar bearded man walked in with a basket full of riceballs. He put them down on the desk and greeted Satan and saddam.

"Hey guys I brought sweeties!" he announced.

"Erm...osama..." said Satan. "Shouldn't you be in a cave in Afghanistan or somewhere...?"

"Yeah..." he replied. "but I got so board waiting for America to find me...playing hide and seek is fun but not if the other side is useless at the game..."

"You think they're playing hide and seek with you?" asked Satan.

"Yeah...but as I said it was boring so I came to the Pokémon world to see my two favourite guys..." as he said that he punched Satan in the arm playfully. Satan just laughed uneasily.

"Osama..."

"yeah..."

"Your an idiot!"

James just watched them, as he got dressed. Then osama picked up the basket of rice balls again.

"Donut anyone?" he asked.

That was it, that was the last thing James was gonna take from these three....whatever!

"OKAY!!!" he snapped. "If you REALLY ARE the owners of 4kids then your gonna here me out okay? First they are RICE BALLS not DONUTS! Second stop cutting out all the scenes, which are actually GOOD and banning the cooler episodes! Third stop blurring out all the Japanese writing! And fourth...I...am...not....GAY!!!!"

"Yes you are..." replied saddam as he ate one of the rice balls. "..we made you that way cos we're all gay too!"

"But doesn't Osama have like 40 wives or something...?"

Satan, osama and Saddam looked at each other then back at James.

"So...?"

Then they suddenly heard a police siren coming from outside.

"Oppps...." said osama as he put on an old ladies head scarf. "...I gotta go, I'm going undercover as dot cotton from eastenders for a while, cya!"

With that he tried to jump through the glass of the window....but instead he bounced back and landed on the floor just like James, he got up and saw Satan and Saddam pointing towards the door.

"Thankyou..." he said as he ran out of it. As soon as he had gone Satan gave out a huge sigh.

"I really hate that guy..."

"Well I'll just be leaving too..." announced James as he snuck towards the door but Satan and saddam stopped him and pushed him back inside.

"Oh no!" said saddam. "Your gonna play a game with us first!"

"Do I have to!" moaned James.

"Yes!" snapped Satan and Saddam together as they shut the door together.

Meanwhile in Japan....

The digimon tamers are stood by a park all eating ice-cream cones when Jeri walks by followed by Guilmon who she was playing with.

"Hi Takato..." she said. Takato instantly blushed as she talked to him. "...me and guilmon had lots of fun in the park and Guilmon got bit by a dog and he's now all rabid....well goodbye!"

Jeri just walks off leaving a stunned takato.

"What... did ....she....say?"

He is then interrupted by a very low growling, all three tamers turn to see guilmon foaming at the mouth. He then pounced at takato and started tearing into him.

"Arrggghhhh! guys help!!!!" he screamed towards his two friends.

Henry and Rika looked at each other.

"Wanna get a soda?" asked Henry.

"Sure why not?" replied rika, they then began to walk away.

"Where are you guys going? Help meeeee!!!!" screamed takato, only terriermon, who was perched on Henry's shoulder looked back.

"Momentai, take it easy!" he said before they all disappeared out of view.

"Take it easy? TAKE IT EASY? How can I take it easy when I've got a giant mad dinosaur on top of me trying to eat my vital organs!!!!" He then looked at Guilmon. "Hey do you have to eat that? I need that to live!"

Anyway back with the others in the forest Ash is running around as the others sat on the floor screaming "underpants" at the top of his voice.

"UNDERPANTS!!!"

"Okay, why is he screaming underpants at the top of his voice?" asked Jesse.

"It's his new word of the day" replied Misty.

"Oh I see...."

"UNDERPANTS!!!!"

Just then James walked into view looking a bit...spaced out!

"Well it's about time you came back!!!!" sneered Jesse as she walked up to him; she then realized that he didn't seem to notice she was there.

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!" was all he said to her.

"What?"

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!" he repeated, a bit louder this time.

"What did he just say?" asked Meowth.

"It sounded like "Misty is the greatest out of the lot of you!" replied misty.

"Nah!" added on Brock. "It was defiantly "I am Gay! I am Gay!"

"UNDERPANTS!!!!"

"Brock, James isn't Gay!" snapped misty.

"He Sooooooooooooooo is! Your just saying he isn't cos your hoping one day he'll seduce you cos you think I'm not good enough for you!"

"Your so wrong Brock, I have Ash to seduce me!"

"By the time he's matured enough to do that he'll be 93!!!"

"UNDERPANTS!!!!!"

"Anyway James is gonna seduce me first!!!" snapped Jesse.

"Dream on sistah..." laughed Meowth. "...we all know he only has eyes for me!"

"No me!!!" Brock snapped back.

"No me!!!" shouted Misty.

"No it's me!!!!!" yelled Jesse.

"UNDERPANTS!!!!!"

Then everyone fell silent.

"What were we arguing about again?" asked Misty.

"I haven't a clue" replied Meowth.

Meanwhile, somewhere else in the forest....

Togepi is walking along looking for anything he can shoot with his new state of the art laser gun. He then found the perfect victim...

"Woah! Look at the size of this Arbok..." said a very excited guy with an Australian accent. "Isn't she a butte..." He then noticed togepi stood in front of him.

"Why hi there little fella...."

"EAT LASER PERPETUALLY EXCITED AUSTRALIN GUY!!!!" screamed Togepi as he brought out his laser gun and fired it as the crocodile hunter.

"Woah! Isn't THIS exciting folks...this evil egg is burning my insides and it feels GREAT!!!!!!"

He then disintegrates...like Vampires do on buffy the vampire slayer. With that Togepi put his little hands together and scowled happily just like Mr. Burns from the Simpson's.

"Egg-xellent!"

Everyone groans....

"What? What?" asked Togepi. "I'm evil and that means I can make puns anytime I want DAMNIT!!!!"

Meanwhile, back with the others....

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof! Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!" James said to his co- stars.

"Hummmm...." said Brock as he rubbed his chin. "...that seems to be the only thing he can say!"

"Well never squinty boy" snapped Misty sarcastically.

"How r we gonna do the motto if that's all the can say?" Jesse asked meowth. She then decided to try something.

"To protect the world from devastation!"

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!"

"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!"

"Oh it isn't the same..." moaned Jesse.

"Our best friend maybe possessed by some evil spirit and all you care about is the motto?" snapped meowth

"I don't think he's possessed..." replied Brock. "...I just think he must of gone through some horrible trauma while at 4kids!"

"That...actually makes sense..." said misty. "...that's...unusual..."

The group then look around nervously.

"This IS a tad fic right?" asked Meowth.

"Yeah..." replied Brock. "...so where are all the unusual insane stuff."

"Damn it!" cursed the author. "I should of kept Tracey in so I could do some thirdwheelshipping!"

Meanwhile somewhere else in the Johto, kenta is sat with his typlosion.

"Why does my hair grow out of my forehead?" he asked his Pokémon.

"I dunno...cos your a freak..." replied the typlosion.

"Fair enough!" he paused then asked another question. "Why am I in this fic when pokémon crystal is like 3 years ahead of Ash's series?"

"Cos I mysteriously went forward in time, ya happy!" snapped the author.

"Fair enough!"

Back with the others they had decided to go back to 4kids to see what could of happened to James.

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!"

"Okay that's getting annoying now!" snapped Jesse.

"Wobb-bbuffet!"

"UNDERPANTS!!!" screamed Ash.

"So is that!" sighed misty.

"Woooba wobba wob!!!"

"So are you!" Jesse snapped as she got out her pokéball but when she went to return Wobbuffet a red laser shot out and disintegrated him. As Jesse stood there in total shock togepi walked by laughing his little evil face off.

"Oh you humans are so funny!" he said in between fits of laughter. "You didn't even know I had hidden a secret laser in that pokeball of yours!" Jesse just scowled at him.

"I've suddenly got a craving for fried evil egg" she said, she then whipped out a frying pan.

"Come here you bastard egg!" she screamed as she ran after him. Togepi quickly ran away and headed off into a field full of flowers, but as he crossed it the others stopped and gasped.

"It's a field full of ninja bellossoms..." screamed Brock.

"And killer robot Butterfrees...." added on misty.

"And politicians..." cried Jesse.

"We promise to make the world a better place..." said Tony Blair.

"And I did not have sexual relations with this Bellossom..." added on Bill Clinton...for no real reason.

"Whahahahahahahahah!" Togepi cackled at the other side of the deadly field. "You have to cross this to get to 4kids whahahahahahahahah!"

"Well actually we could just use the bridge" said Brock, pointing out the wooden bridge that's not too far from them.

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...?" screamed Togepi. "Why am I upstaged every time by slow witted, sex obsessed teenagers and their stupid feeble Pokémon?"

"I think he described you very well Brock!" laughed Misty.

"He was talking about all of us bitch!" Brock snapped back.

"And just because I've barley been mentioned in this fic doesn't mean I'm feeble egg!" snapped pikachu.

"Whatever!" sighed Togepi as he walked away.

Suddenly Ash's eyes lit up at the sight of Pikachu.

"WoW! What pokémon is that?" he gasped as he whipped out his Pokédex.

"Pikachu the electric mouse Pokémon..." replied Dexter. "...you've had this damn rat for over three years YOU SHOULD KNOW WHAT IS IS!!!!"

"WOW! I gotta catch it!!!!" he declared happily. With that he got out a Pokéball and threw it at pikachu. Remembering it's fear of Pokéballs, Pikachu whacked the Pokéball into the dangerous field of flowers, but as it landed in the field, he actually caught something.

"I caught a Pokémon!!!" chanted Ash as he danced around ....... again!

"Er...no you didn't..." Jesse told him. "You just caught Tony Blair!"

Ash just looked puzzled for a while...well 5 minutes...he then began to chant again as he ran out into the dangerous field...followed by screaming.

"ARRRGGGGHHHH! THE ROBOT BUTTERFREES ARE GOUGING MY EYES OUT!!!!!!"

Meanwhile on the federation starship voyager somewhere in the delta quadrant...

"Hummmm..." said Janeway as she sat in her chair on the bridge. "...why did the author choose to do voyager instead of the new enterprise series"

Suddenly the Author (*AKA: ME!!!*) appears before her making her jump 6 feet in the air.

"Ha scared ya!" the author laughed as Janeway went back to sitting in her chair. "And the answer to your question is that I ate the enterprise ship and it disagreed with me"

"You ATE it?" asked Tom Paris sounding puzzled, the author just nodded.

"Okay HOW many shots of cola did you have today?" asked Chakotay.

"50!" the author replied, she then whipped out a bottle of cola from nowhere and down that in one, she then looks all spaced out.

"I can see through time!" she gasped.

Suddenly all the power goes out in the ship.

"What's going on?" asked janeway.

"All the power has gone out" replied Tom.

"I just told them that dumbass" the author snapped back.

Suddenly a deep robot type voice comes over the audio doodly thing!

"I am the Pokédex, prepare to be assimilated, resistance is futile!"

"Uh-oh!" said the author. "Your in deep doo-doo now!"

"Doo-doo?" asked Harry Kim.

"Well I'm going..." snapped the author. "...I'm not getting assimilated into the Pokédex collective, I've got a fanfic to finish, goodbye!"

With that the author disappears.

"Pokédex collective?" asked Tom now looking very confused.

"Now it's time for my final thought..." said jerry Springer as he walked onto the bridge much to the voyager's crew's surprise.

"How in the HELL did you get on my ship?" asked Janeway.

"I'm part of the Q collective" replied Jerry Springer.

"Huh?"

"What?"

"Ey?"

"Hummmmm mm...."

"Pig butts...!!!!"

Everyone looked at Seven of nine who shouted out the last comment.

"What...?" she asked. "....I was told to say that by the author!"

Everyone sighed then got assimilated by the Pokédex.

Meanwhile back with the main characters of the fic....

"Hey where did my Pokédex go?" Ash asked the rest of the group, but nobody answered him.

"The anime hamsters! ALL THE CUTE LITTLE ANIME HAMSTERS!!!!" screamed the author, everyone just looked at her.

"Since when did she join the group?" asked Jesse.

"And how come I have a feeling we'll all regret the rest of this fic" added on Brock.

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!" said James.

"If he carries on saying that he won't LIVE to the end of the fic" snapped Misty clenching her fists.

"That's not nice" said Pikachu, but he received a very powerful right hook from Misty concussing the poor rodent.

"Stupid rat!" Misty muttered, as they all carried on their way.

Soon enough they reached the 4Kids HQ.

"Okay this is it..." sneered Jesse. "...now we pay them back for what they did to James"

"And to pay them back for making him seem gay" added on misty. Brock just laughed.

"He does most of that on his own"

"HE'S NOT GAY!!!" snapped misty.

"Oh please..." the author added on. "...he's neither straight or Gay!"

"Huh?"

"You'll see later on..." the author then headed inside the 4kids HQ building. "...Come on lets go troopers!"

All the others looked nervously at each other.

"What does she have planned for me?" stuttered James nervously.

"Hey!" Jesse snapped at him. "You're only supposed to be able to say "Lived Eht Era Sdikruof"

"Oh sorry...Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!"

"That's better...now lets go!"

Soon enough they found themselves walking up to the office of the 4kids boss.

"Okay this is it..." said Jesse. "...whatever we find behind those doors we'll support each other through it okay?"

"Get bent!" snapped Brock. "The first sign of trouble and I'm high tailing my ass outta here!"

"YAY FOR TEAM SPIRIT!!!" the author called happily waving little flags in the air.

"Talking about spirits..." began meowth. "...she didn't happen to mix any in with her cola did she?"

"CUTE ANIME HAMSTERS!!!!"

"Nope...I don't think so..." replied Brock with a sweatdrop on his head, he then looked over to where the author was carrying on a full length conversation with a statue of a Jigglypuff. "...but I'm beginning to wonder about her mental state!"

"Prima has big hooters"

"Well that's just stating the obvious" said meowth.

"She does!!!!" snapped Brock. "Why in the hell did I have to become Professor Ivy's sex slave, when I could of been travelling the orange islands meeting elite trainers with huge breasts"

"Well dat's it..." sighed meowth. "...the fic has officially become dodgy!"

"Well at least she vowed not to do perverted rocketshipping this time!" announced Jesse as she and James high fived each other.

"DAMN YOU BOTH TO HELL!!!!!" snapped the author pointing a finger at them; she then began to wander away looking all confused.

"We got off the point of the story again" said misty.

So with that, to make the fic go faster...or to make up for lost time the group charged at the door to the office and knocked the door down.

"Ohhhhhhhh! We have more people to play with!" announced Saddam as he and Satan...played monopoly on the desk...yes! Just plain old monopoly!

"Lived Eht Era Sdikruof! Lived Eht Era Sdikruof!" screamed James as he pointed at Satan.

"Oh....so he's saying 4kids are the devil..." Jesse said happily, her face then fell. "After all that we find out he was saying 4kids are the devil...that's a bit disappointing!"

"But what here disturbed James that much that "4kids are the devil" was the only thing he could say....backwards?" asked Brock.

"Oh I can answer that..." said Satan. "...it was the year 1633 and the night was young..."

"No that's your life story..." saddam told him.

"Oh yeah..." replied Satan. "...okay well we wanted James to play a game with us...and the only game we had in our office was monopoly..."

"Dat isn't disturbing" snapped meowth.

"It is when your playing strip monoploy and you get to see the thing growing on my butt!!!" replied saddam. "Wanna see...?"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" screamed everyone else.

"Well that's it..." said James who was now back to normal. "The mystery has been solved and we can all go home!"

They were all about to leave but found they couldn't escape cause the author was blocking the doorway.

"Oh no! This fic isn't over until I say it is PUNKS!!! I had this whole Pokémon battle planned for the end!"

"FINE!!!!" snapped Satan. He then gets out a Pokéball and throws it. "I choose you osama bin ladan!"

"HUH?" said everyone else.

"I thought you went be be some old lady in a soap!" James snapped.

"Osama ma ma" was all osama said.

"Now I'm disturbed!" moaned Brock holding his head. "I need to see some naked chick pictures to make me feel better!"

"Hey twerp...!" Jesse snapped to Ash. "...use Tony Blair...we all know Tony Blair types are strong against Osama Bin laden types!"

"Really?"

"YES!"

"Okay!" with that Ash through his Pokéball. "I choose you Tony Blair!"

"Tony Blair Blair!"

"That's it!" snapped Brock. "I can't carry on with my life knowing this is what I have to live for...goodbye cruel world!"

With that he runs towards the window but bounces off it.

"DAMN!" he cursed. "I can't even commit suicide!!!"

"Osama bin Laden use your dig attack!" commanded Satan...but they're in a building so digging won't exactly work dumbass!

"Er...Tony Blair use your incredibly long boring speech attack!" said Ash, which is exactly what he did and made Satan, Osama and saddam fall asleep. "Okay now use hyper beam!"

"Since when does a politician Pokémon know hyper beam?" asked James.

"Blame her!" snapped Ash pointing at the author. "She couldn't come up with any more Polititon type attacks!"

With that Tony Blair used Hyper beam and blew Satan, osama and saddam through the roof.

"Looks like team evil is blasting off again!!!!!"

"Good job Tony Blair..." said Ash. "...you deserve a long nice rest!"

"Blair...!"

Ash returns Tony Blair to his Pokéball just as Togepi walked in...he took one looks at the hole in the roof and screamed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I was supposed to be blasted off with them and become a part of team evil! Now I'm stuck with you evil bastard children!"

"Oh don't be silly Togepi honey..." said Misty petting her evil egg on the head. "You'll ALWAYS be a part of our team..."

"CRAP!!!"

Soon enough everybody walked outside into the bright sunshine.

"Well another day another tad fic over and done with" announced James.

"Well nearly" said the author. "I have yet to prove that you are neither straight or gay!"

"Oh and how are you gonna do that?" laughed James. With that the author runs off and returns pulling a lamppost behind her. James' eyes suddenly go all sparkly.

"It's BEAUTIFUL!!!!" he announced as he hugged it....everyone else developed sweatdrops on their heads.

"That's it!" snapped Jesse. "I'm resigning from these tad fics...they may pay more money to star in but I couldn't careless, they're just way to freaky!"

"I don't pay you to star in these things" the author told her.

"Then where was all that extra money I was getting coming from?"

"Oh that would be the money from the porn videos you made with Brock" said Ash. "Apparently they're selling pretty well!"

"Oh...erm...okay!" stuttered a flustered Jesse.

"You don't even know what the word porn means, Ash!" snapped Misty.

"Well I might not, but I know my mum does a lot of it with professor oak, so it can't be all that bad!"

Everyone sighs and just walks off leaving the terminally confused boy all on his own.

So as this fic ends I'll do a nice little question bit...

Did those one scene sub plots mean anything at all? Did Jesse REALLY make a porn video with Brock? Why is the author so mad on cute little anime Hamsters? Is this the last of Team Evil? Have I really substituted rocketshipping for Rocketlampshipping? And who's gonna dub Pokémon now 4kids are gone?

I'll feel like answering those when I bloody well feel like it...I'm off to sober up now! Cya!

THE END