Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Awakened Memories ❯ Pain & Confessions ( Chapter 8 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: Robin Terrae 
Daisuke and Ken talk things over.... as do Ken and Oikawa...
Anime/Manga: Digimon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.09.2001 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.8K | Visits: 333 | Status: Completed
Daisuke and Ken talk things over.... as do Ken and Oikawa...
Anime/Manga: Digimon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.09.2001 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.8K | Visits: 333 | Status: Completed
Well, I'm had tried to finish this before moving day on September 2nd, but to avail. I really hate having to pack up my crap to take it three hours away to college... ^_^;;; Oh, well...
Digimon and its characters do not belong to me... Must I do this every time? *sees evil lawyers standing off to the side* Yeah, I guess so... *sighs*
Almost to the end!!!!
Awakened Memories
By: Robin Terrae
Chapter 8: Pain & Confessions
Silence hung in the air, and it was several moments before anyone could even attempt to do anything.
Ken's hand was still clamped soundly over his mouth, his eyes wide, showing shock. If Daisuke stared hard enough he could swear that he saw Ken's hand shaking. He turned, as if he was going to run again.
"Ken! Don't you *dare* leave me again!"
Stopping in mid-step, Ken glanced back around at Daisuke in confusion. "Please, Daisuke..."
Daisuke was angry now. Why did Ken always have to run from his problems? Running from his pain was what had inadvertently created the Kaiser, and be damned, Daisuke wasn't letting anything like that happen again. "Please, what? 'Let me run?' I don't think so, Ken. If there's one thing our time in the Digital World should have taught you, it's not to run from your problems."
Ken turned around, looking like a scared rabbit, "You don't understand..."
Daisuke sighed, moving a step closer to his boyfriend. "I know I don't, but that doesn't mean that I don't care." He took another step, "*Make* me understand, Ken."
Ken shook his head, "I don't think I could..." his voice trailed off in a helpless whisper, and Daisuke moved another step closer, so that he was standing right in front of Ken, staring right into the other boy's eyes.
The Digimon, forgotten in this moment, could only watch. Wormmon's heart ached at the pain he could hear clearly in his partner's voice, but he knew that now was not his time to comfort the boy. V-mon, sensing his friend's plight, gently laid one clawed hand on the digital worm's back, causing Wormmon to glance at him in surprise. The little dragon smiled and Wormmon nodded in return, turning back to watch the drama unfold.
Daisuke didn't reach out to touch Ken, for he knew that his touch would be unwelcome, and he couldn't stand to see Ken reject his touch. Instead he stood, hands hanging at his sides. "You haven't even tried, Ken..." he said softly, trying to convey his feelings with his tone of voice.
Ken winced as if slapped. He loved Daisuke, and could never refuse him, no matter what the other boy asked. He didn't want to do this. He just wanted to go back and pretend that everything was okay. To go home, snuggle with Daisuke, and believe that this never happened.
He couldn't do that though.
Because no matter how much he wanted it, things would never be the same again. Ken swallowed, running a slim, trembling hand through dark locks of hair. "It happened that night, when Oikawa kidnapped me to copy the Dark Seed." Ken's voice was soft, and Daisuke almost couldn't hear it. "It happened after I woke up soon after he copied the seed from my body." Ken shuddered, wrapping his arms around himself, "He approached me and told me how beautiful I was..." Ken's voice faltered then grew somewhat stronger, tears silently leaking from his eyes. "He started touching me, and I... I begged him to stop... and I thought he listened... but then..." Ken's voice stopped, and he gave a rueful, self-loathing laugh, "I was so stupid... I thought he listened... but..." The tears came faster, Ken's eyes taking on a far away look, and Daisuke knew that Ken was re-living that night in his mind's eyes.
"But why did you run from me?"
"Why do you think?" Ken asked harshly, "I love you, Daisuke, but you don't need damaged goods. You deserve someone not so screwed up, someone who can make you happy..." Ken shook his head sadly, "... and I am not that person."
Daisuke grew angry at this, "How you know?" he asked, yelling, "Who are you to tell me what *I* want?! Shouldn't I be the judge of that?!"
"But..."
But Daisuke cut Ken off, not wanting to hear anything more. "Ken, I love you, that will never change as long as I live." He raised his brown eyes so that he was staring straight at the other boy, so Ken could read the sincerity that was contained within, "We've been through way to much in life to give it up now." He reached out to Ken, his arms wide, "You are not damaged goods. That was forced on you; it wasn't something that you asked for or wanted. And I didn't fall in love with you because you were prefect, I fell in love with you because you are a strong, caring, kind person, and my best friend." Ken stared at Daisuke, more tears gathering in his eyes. Daisuke smiled, adding, "Ken, I love you for you, with all your faults and strengths. And nothing, *nothing* would or could ever make me stop."
"Daisuke..."
Daisuke smiled softly at Ken, noticing the tears in the other boy's eyes, ones that he knew where mirrored in his own.
Oikawa watched the whole event silently for a moment, before turning to leave. There was nothing of importance here anymore.
"Wait!"
Oikawa stopped, turning to meet pain-filled blue eyes. Ken Ichijouji stood behind him, tears running down his face. Behind him, Daisuke stood, the Digimon standing at his side. "Yes?"
"I have to know one thing." Ken asked softly.
Daisuke took a step forward. "Ken..."
But the other boy shook his head, "No, Daisuke."
Daisuke looked confused, "But, Ken..."
And for the first in what seemed like an eternity, Ken smiled at him. A *true* smile. "Trust me."
Daisuke nodded, taking a step back, joining their Digimon.
Ken shot him one more grateful look, before facing Oikawa again. His eyes became hard, and when he spoke his voice was laced with hot anger. "Did you enjoy it?" he asked, almost hissing the words. "Did you enjoy hearing me cry and beg for mercy as you took one of the most important things in my life away from me? Are you glad to know that when I sleep as night, I wake with the denials falling from my lips?"
Daisuke bit his lip, but otherwise did nothing. He had promised Ken that he wouldn't interfere and he wouldn't. He trusted his boyfriend with his life, and he knew that Ken deserved that kind of trust in return. V-mon and Wormmon stood at Daisuke's feet, watching Ken in concern. V-mon's clawed hand rested on Wormmon's head, giving the little green digital worm comfort. Wormmon hated seeing his partner like this, but knew that it was necessary. He just hoped that this provided the answers that Ken sought.
Oikawa's ghostly image studied the boy in front of him. After what seemed like hours, but was, in reality, barely five minutes, he spoke. "I live with what I have done everyday. While Belial Vamdemon possessed me, I was well aware of what was going on, but unable to stop it. He *knew* this, that when he agreed to grant my wish to see the Digital World, I would not have agreed to do it in the manner he chose. He taunted me with what he had done when in control of my body, in my sleep. He used you, Ken, not to the extent that he used me, but much worse." He sighed softly, and glanced over at the Digimon and Daisuke. "He knew that there was only one Chosen who would be able to defeat him, and that was Motomiya Daisuke."
"What??" that came from Daisuke, who stared at Oikawa with his mouth wide open.
"Something about you told Vamdemon, back at the convention center, that you would be the boy who would ultimately lead to his defeat. He knew this, and decided that he wanted to harm you, but in an indirect way. He chose the heart."
Ken stood silently, his eyes no longer showing any emotion. Daisuke, V-mon, and Wormmon all glanced at him worriedly, but they said nothing. They had agreed to allow Ken to handle this his own way, and that's what they would do.
"I won't even try to convince you to forgive me, Ken. It's not my right. But I am glad that Vamdemon is rotting in whatever Digital Hell he was sent to." Oikawa stared at the young boy in front of him, before turning to go, "Believe in Daisuke, Ken." Then his form grew lighter, becoming the shining wings of a flock of butterflies before disappearing into the air.
Ken watched them go, not even bothering to look at Daisuke as the other boy made a move to stand next to him. Instead, he just stared straight ahead, not even bothering to move the hair out of his eyes when the wind blew.
"I'm sorry." Daisuke said softly, almost too softly to be heard. It weighed heavily on his mind, that he was the cause of all of Ken's pain, all of his suffering.
Ken glanced over at his boyfriend's whispered apology. "Whatever for?" he asked, surprise lining the edge of his voice.
"For what Oikawa did to you... what Vamdemon did to you." He answered, "If only I had been quicker that night... If only Vamdemon hadn't kidnapped all of the kids..."
Ken sighed, "Daisuke, life is too short to be filled with 'what if's'." He met his boyfriend's eyes. "You came after me, that's what is important. And you didn't know what the future would be... so, don't blame yourself for Vamdemon."
"But still..." Daisuke started softly, but the look in Ken's eyes stopped him.
"Dai... please." Ken said, "I will never blame you for what happened. It was Oikawa and Vamdemon's fault." He turned away, staring off into their surroundings. "It's true that what they did to me will be with me for the rest of my life, and nothing that I can do will change it, but I think that with time, the memories will fade..." he smiled at Daisuke.
Daisuke smiled back, "We'll just have to create new memories!"
V-mon and Wormmon both smiled at each other, Wormmon glad to see that Ken was smiling again, and V-mon happy to see everyone else happy.
"Come on." Daisuke said, finally, holding out a hand to Ken, "Let's go home."
Ken glanced back up at the sky, then at Daisuke. "Okay."
To Be Completed....
Digimon and its characters do not belong to me... Must I do this every time? *sees evil lawyers standing off to the side* Yeah, I guess so... *sighs*
Almost to the end!!!!
Awakened Memories
By: Robin Terrae
Chapter 8: Pain & Confessions
Silence hung in the air, and it was several moments before anyone could even attempt to do anything.
Ken's hand was still clamped soundly over his mouth, his eyes wide, showing shock. If Daisuke stared hard enough he could swear that he saw Ken's hand shaking. He turned, as if he was going to run again.
"Ken! Don't you *dare* leave me again!"
Stopping in mid-step, Ken glanced back around at Daisuke in confusion. "Please, Daisuke..."
Daisuke was angry now. Why did Ken always have to run from his problems? Running from his pain was what had inadvertently created the Kaiser, and be damned, Daisuke wasn't letting anything like that happen again. "Please, what? 'Let me run?' I don't think so, Ken. If there's one thing our time in the Digital World should have taught you, it's not to run from your problems."
Ken turned around, looking like a scared rabbit, "You don't understand..."
Daisuke sighed, moving a step closer to his boyfriend. "I know I don't, but that doesn't mean that I don't care." He took another step, "*Make* me understand, Ken."
Ken shook his head, "I don't think I could..." his voice trailed off in a helpless whisper, and Daisuke moved another step closer, so that he was standing right in front of Ken, staring right into the other boy's eyes.
The Digimon, forgotten in this moment, could only watch. Wormmon's heart ached at the pain he could hear clearly in his partner's voice, but he knew that now was not his time to comfort the boy. V-mon, sensing his friend's plight, gently laid one clawed hand on the digital worm's back, causing Wormmon to glance at him in surprise. The little dragon smiled and Wormmon nodded in return, turning back to watch the drama unfold.
Daisuke didn't reach out to touch Ken, for he knew that his touch would be unwelcome, and he couldn't stand to see Ken reject his touch. Instead he stood, hands hanging at his sides. "You haven't even tried, Ken..." he said softly, trying to convey his feelings with his tone of voice.
Ken winced as if slapped. He loved Daisuke, and could never refuse him, no matter what the other boy asked. He didn't want to do this. He just wanted to go back and pretend that everything was okay. To go home, snuggle with Daisuke, and believe that this never happened.
He couldn't do that though.
Because no matter how much he wanted it, things would never be the same again. Ken swallowed, running a slim, trembling hand through dark locks of hair. "It happened that night, when Oikawa kidnapped me to copy the Dark Seed." Ken's voice was soft, and Daisuke almost couldn't hear it. "It happened after I woke up soon after he copied the seed from my body." Ken shuddered, wrapping his arms around himself, "He approached me and told me how beautiful I was..." Ken's voice faltered then grew somewhat stronger, tears silently leaking from his eyes. "He started touching me, and I... I begged him to stop... and I thought he listened... but then..." Ken's voice stopped, and he gave a rueful, self-loathing laugh, "I was so stupid... I thought he listened... but..." The tears came faster, Ken's eyes taking on a far away look, and Daisuke knew that Ken was re-living that night in his mind's eyes.
"But why did you run from me?"
"Why do you think?" Ken asked harshly, "I love you, Daisuke, but you don't need damaged goods. You deserve someone not so screwed up, someone who can make you happy..." Ken shook his head sadly, "... and I am not that person."
Daisuke grew angry at this, "How you know?" he asked, yelling, "Who are you to tell me what *I* want?! Shouldn't I be the judge of that?!"
"But..."
But Daisuke cut Ken off, not wanting to hear anything more. "Ken, I love you, that will never change as long as I live." He raised his brown eyes so that he was staring straight at the other boy, so Ken could read the sincerity that was contained within, "We've been through way to much in life to give it up now." He reached out to Ken, his arms wide, "You are not damaged goods. That was forced on you; it wasn't something that you asked for or wanted. And I didn't fall in love with you because you were prefect, I fell in love with you because you are a strong, caring, kind person, and my best friend." Ken stared at Daisuke, more tears gathering in his eyes. Daisuke smiled, adding, "Ken, I love you for you, with all your faults and strengths. And nothing, *nothing* would or could ever make me stop."
"Daisuke..."
Daisuke smiled softly at Ken, noticing the tears in the other boy's eyes, ones that he knew where mirrored in his own.
Oikawa watched the whole event silently for a moment, before turning to leave. There was nothing of importance here anymore.
"Wait!"
Oikawa stopped, turning to meet pain-filled blue eyes. Ken Ichijouji stood behind him, tears running down his face. Behind him, Daisuke stood, the Digimon standing at his side. "Yes?"
"I have to know one thing." Ken asked softly.
Daisuke took a step forward. "Ken..."
But the other boy shook his head, "No, Daisuke."
Daisuke looked confused, "But, Ken..."
And for the first in what seemed like an eternity, Ken smiled at him. A *true* smile. "Trust me."
Daisuke nodded, taking a step back, joining their Digimon.
Ken shot him one more grateful look, before facing Oikawa again. His eyes became hard, and when he spoke his voice was laced with hot anger. "Did you enjoy it?" he asked, almost hissing the words. "Did you enjoy hearing me cry and beg for mercy as you took one of the most important things in my life away from me? Are you glad to know that when I sleep as night, I wake with the denials falling from my lips?"
Daisuke bit his lip, but otherwise did nothing. He had promised Ken that he wouldn't interfere and he wouldn't. He trusted his boyfriend with his life, and he knew that Ken deserved that kind of trust in return. V-mon and Wormmon stood at Daisuke's feet, watching Ken in concern. V-mon's clawed hand rested on Wormmon's head, giving the little green digital worm comfort. Wormmon hated seeing his partner like this, but knew that it was necessary. He just hoped that this provided the answers that Ken sought.
Oikawa's ghostly image studied the boy in front of him. After what seemed like hours, but was, in reality, barely five minutes, he spoke. "I live with what I have done everyday. While Belial Vamdemon possessed me, I was well aware of what was going on, but unable to stop it. He *knew* this, that when he agreed to grant my wish to see the Digital World, I would not have agreed to do it in the manner he chose. He taunted me with what he had done when in control of my body, in my sleep. He used you, Ken, not to the extent that he used me, but much worse." He sighed softly, and glanced over at the Digimon and Daisuke. "He knew that there was only one Chosen who would be able to defeat him, and that was Motomiya Daisuke."
"What??" that came from Daisuke, who stared at Oikawa with his mouth wide open.
"Something about you told Vamdemon, back at the convention center, that you would be the boy who would ultimately lead to his defeat. He knew this, and decided that he wanted to harm you, but in an indirect way. He chose the heart."
Ken stood silently, his eyes no longer showing any emotion. Daisuke, V-mon, and Wormmon all glanced at him worriedly, but they said nothing. They had agreed to allow Ken to handle this his own way, and that's what they would do.
"I won't even try to convince you to forgive me, Ken. It's not my right. But I am glad that Vamdemon is rotting in whatever Digital Hell he was sent to." Oikawa stared at the young boy in front of him, before turning to go, "Believe in Daisuke, Ken." Then his form grew lighter, becoming the shining wings of a flock of butterflies before disappearing into the air.
Ken watched them go, not even bothering to look at Daisuke as the other boy made a move to stand next to him. Instead, he just stared straight ahead, not even bothering to move the hair out of his eyes when the wind blew.
"I'm sorry." Daisuke said softly, almost too softly to be heard. It weighed heavily on his mind, that he was the cause of all of Ken's pain, all of his suffering.
Ken glanced over at his boyfriend's whispered apology. "Whatever for?" he asked, surprise lining the edge of his voice.
"For what Oikawa did to you... what Vamdemon did to you." He answered, "If only I had been quicker that night... If only Vamdemon hadn't kidnapped all of the kids..."
Ken sighed, "Daisuke, life is too short to be filled with 'what if's'." He met his boyfriend's eyes. "You came after me, that's what is important. And you didn't know what the future would be... so, don't blame yourself for Vamdemon."
"But still..." Daisuke started softly, but the look in Ken's eyes stopped him.
"Dai... please." Ken said, "I will never blame you for what happened. It was Oikawa and Vamdemon's fault." He turned away, staring off into their surroundings. "It's true that what they did to me will be with me for the rest of my life, and nothing that I can do will change it, but I think that with time, the memories will fade..." he smiled at Daisuke.
Daisuke smiled back, "We'll just have to create new memories!"
V-mon and Wormmon both smiled at each other, Wormmon glad to see that Ken was smiling again, and V-mon happy to see everyone else happy.
"Come on." Daisuke said, finally, holding out a hand to Ken, "Let's go home."
Ken glanced back up at the sky, then at Daisuke. "Okay."
To Be Completed....