Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Digital Fiction Theatre 3000 ❯ A Glass of Lemonade ( Chapter 3 )

A/N It's finally here. And would you know it, my pre-selected fic has several sequels! All flames for the content of the fic should be sent to CODY ME (if you can find his E-Mail address). I didn't write it, I just insulted it. This takes place after the second chapter of the "traditional" (read: not lemon) series. (features Tamers and Izzy). Also, there will be NO fourth wall violations this time around. Well, maybe one before the third break…

Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon the fic I'm MSTing (I mean who would MST his own fic?), or the songs used for riffs.

(the DFT gang is once again discussing the upcoming fic)

Davis: Things are going to get worse before they get better.

Kari: What do you mean?

Izzy: I think he's referring to the fic we're reading today.

Cody: The title alone scares me.

Ken: The errors in the title scare me.

Takato: The concept of reading a Yaoi lemon scares me. To each his own, but this is definitely not my own.

Henry: The thought of being in a theatre with Yolei and a Yaoi lemon scares me. The fic's already going to be traumatic enough, but with the boy-hunting Yolei…

Calamon: (oblivious) Let's play!

Takato: How about after we read the story. That way you can cheer us up when we really need it.

(TK walks in)

TK: Good news. When I found this fic the author had changed his name and written three sequels so far.

Rika: And how is that good news?

TK: It means I don't have to look hard for material. Dog Bone!

Jun: Not again…

(door sequence)(Door 1 is a digiportal. They cover their ears to block out the terrible English dub music)(Door 2 is Magnaangemon's Gate of Destiny. They pass through it with some concern as to where it goes)(Door 3 is shaped like a lemon (the fruit). It opens with a moan and all kinds of juices spill out)(Door 4 is a normal door guarded by a mallet. As they pass through it the mallet hits each one of them)(Door 5 is the Digimon logo in a circle with a line through it. Each one of them kicks it to open it)

Kari: As the lights darken we wonder what horrors await us.

TK: One last thing. Yolei, get out here. There's a risk that you will experience pleasure from this fic and it is therefore my duty to take you out of the theatre.

Yolei: (hides a Steely Dan replica) Why would you think that?

I don't own Digonm

Davis: Actually, I'm pretty sure you own "Digonm". You just don't own Digimon

CODY EXPRESSES HIS LOVE TOWARDS IZZY

Ken: He's corrected the name. Slightly…

Takato: I think I just gained some respect for him.

Izzy walk in rooom and see naked Cody on bed that is his.

Rika: Does anyone have a clue what that means?

Jun: I'll translate this fic from Moron to English. "Izzy walks into his room and sees Cody naked on his bed."

Takato: Cancel that respect thing

IZZY; Cody, why you here? I thought I was myself here tonight.

Jun: Forget it. That task is too great for anyone to attempt

Izzy: I would think that I would always be myself…

CODY; I here to say that I love you. I wanna fuck you like a DOG!*Cody jump on Izzy*

Kari: Three paragraphs in and I think the lemon scene just started.

All: Oh, the horror!

IZZY: Wait, let me take my cloth off for you. Wait second.

Izzy: Me wear loincloth for Cdoy to take off.

CODY: Let me help, you big computer nerd that I love muchly. *Cody helps Izzy get naked* Cody jump on Izzy and make love noise*

Kari: What…

Cody: The…

Davis: fuck…

Takato: did…

Rika: that…

Henry: mean?

IZZY: OH YEA! I need lot of love after hard day. Let us get on bed! * Izzy carries naked Cody on bed* Two of thems start to lick body*

Jun: What are "thems"?

Izzy: I wouldn't have a clue!

CODY: You hot.

IZZY: You hotter.

Davis (as Cody): You hotterer

Kari: the sad thing is that's probably what's coming next.

CODY: You HOTTEST! OOOH! *Cody grab Izzy throb cock and sqeeze hardly*

Izzy: Must… kill… author!

IZZY: OWW

Takato: At least there's one realistic thing in this fic. That would hurt like hell.

CODY; Sorry. I love my Izzy. Let get going now!

Ken: (as Izzy) no!

IZZY: No, I wanna lick you first now

Kari: Didn't they already do some licking?

CODY: `Kay. Lick whever you want.

Izzy: I've come up with a subtitle for this fic. The spell checker's suicide.

IZZY: I love ypou Cody, you have very big cock. I wanna get some inside my ass. Please?

Cody: (as fic Cody) no.

CODY: Now you want some?

Ken: (as Izzy) No, I said that because I don't want any.

IZZY: Yea! YEA! Come, hurry, I needa get some from you sooooo badly.

Takato (holding up a card): I wish I wasn't stuck reading this.

(Takato looks at the card)

Rika: Sorry, but it's not blue.

All from 02: WHAT?

CODY: Don't worry, patient Izzyy get more sperm from your love bug...ME!

Izzy: If anyone makes a Herbie joke they die. (sees a look in Davis' eye) Same goes for references to Tentomon

Davis: Dammit!

IZZY: Please hurry. I can not take wait. I neeed you NOW! *Izzy grab Cody's cock and suck it hard* Cody moan wqith pleasureness*

Jun: Shouldn't there have only been two stars there?

CODY: Little to the left, IZzy, baby.

IZZY: Yes, I will love my Cody right way now *Izzy suck Cody nuts with loud slurpy sound* Then go back to cock*

Davis: (to Izzy) Yet another reason why it sucks to be you.

Izzy; You want to say that to my fan club?

CODY; Come now, stop, I think my penis is gonna explode! *Cody sets off in Izzy mouth.* Izzy slurp up it all*

Cody: So now I have no penis?

Izzy: Apparently it liquefied and the fic me drank it all.

IZZY: You taste so delicious. I love it. Cody tastes good.

CODY: Your turn, Izz. *Cody grab Izzy penis and suck with much love sound* Izzy moan and grunt. He happy and loads off in Cody

mouth too*

Kari: Loads off?

Davis: It's best not to think about it.

CODY: You are great, Izz mmmmmm.... tasty....ok, time now for big one Izz.

Jun (as that annoying voice in movie commercials): BJ: The big one. Coming soon to porno-theatres near you.

IZZY: Yep, no problewm. Izzy take cock out of Cody mouth and stick in asshole. *Cody scream*

Ken: Please don't tell me he actually believes this is GOOD writing.

Rika: Okay, I won't…

CODY: OOOOOWWWWW.. YYYEEEEESSSS!!!!!! I never felt good stuff from anyone. Izzy, you rock-hard. SexYYYY!!!

IZYY;*pumping hard* uh, uh, uh, UHHHH!! I am sweat filled from love to Cody.

Izzy: (types something into his Pineapple Laptop)

Davis: What are you doing?

Izzy: Checking a site which lists the make up of various bodily fluid.

Davis: Why?

Izzy: To prove to this author that sperm and sweat are not the same thing.

Henry: You actually have to CHECK that?

Izzy; No, but I figure he may need some convincing…

CODY: OHHHH YYYEEEEAAAA HAW! That is sooo fine!

IZZY; *Thrusting in and out of Cody ass with all his strenght* I love you man, you are da BOMB!

Takato: Then explode and kill everyone associated with this fic.

Cody and Izzy both look at him

CODY: Oh, I feel the love! *Cody turn around and pleasure himslef with own cock* Keep going man, !!

Ken: I assume that's a new term for masturbation?

IZZY: I try

Kari: (singing to the tune of "I try") I try to read this crap and not puke

Rika: (ditto) I try to read this tripe and not vomit

Both: Although I deny it, it's clear. If not for Davis I wouldn't be here!

Davis: HEY!

CODY: YES! My turn yet?

IZZY......almost *thrusts in onew more time real hard and pulls out his throb cock. Cody stop pleasuing himself and grab Izzy butt

cheek*

CODY: Ready?

Izzy: NO!

IZZY: HELL YEA!

CODY: RIGHTY THEN! *Cody sticks cock in Izzy rectum and loads off again with sweet moaning that come from Izzy*

Davis (as Ace Ventura) Alll righty then!

CODY: How do ya like that?

Davis: (singing) You say you (Kari covers his mouth)

Kari: We used that one last time. And I don't want to have that song used in THIS context.

IZYY: Like it? I love it! Massage me please, Cody, you so rocky body!

All: (humming Rocky theme)

CODy: `Kay *Cody grab Izzy's buttcheek and massage with his fingers wuile thrusting in and out of Izzy hole* Izzy scream*

Rika: filling with murderous, murderous rage…

IZZY: YYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

All: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

CODY: I love you Izz...

IZZY: Stop call me that.

CODY: Why? It is my Cody's love name to Izz, see IZZ>>>> you rock-hard...uh, uh, uh, u,h *Cody thrust in 4 times and let out*

Kari: Thrust in 4 times with no out? Is that even possible?

Davis: bad lemon

Kari: right.

IZZY: Oh that was best fucking in life!

CODY: I tired........ Izz, I love you much.

IZZY: What?

CODY: I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!

Davis: He hadn't said that yet?

IZZY: That better, Izzy love codyy two! *Izzy grab Cody's nipple and lick and suckl

Izzy: To do list: Explain difference between male and female anatomy to CODY & ME.

CODY; want more?

All: NO!

IZZY; Naw, I do not wanna tire out Cody that is mine. We can do again nexxt time!!!

Davis: Next time…

All: (scream)

CODY! Oh, yea, lets just kissssaa! NOW! *Cody an Izzy make out till night comes and sandman make them fall asleep.

the end

All: Hooray!

this was best digimon story ever written! Please review. Me thanks!

I AM SOOOO GOOD DIGIMON WRITER!

All: NO YOU'RE NOT!

Davis: Well, that was bad, but it was short.

(TK comes in)

TK: And how did you guinea pigs like that one?

Takato: I am scarred for life.

Rika: Spazoid no baka!

Cody: Isn't the author named "CODY & ME"?

Rika: Yes, but he used to be named "Spazoid Barney".

Henry: It could have been worse…

Izzy: HOW?

Henry: It could have been longer.

TK: Which brings me to my next point. This story was short but has had three sequels so far. You may take a short break, and then sit down and enjoy "CODY DECLARE HIS LOVE TOWARDS KAIR"

All: ENJOY? No chance of that!

TK: Then tolerate it.

(15 minutes later)

(prisoner quarters)

Davis: This is not good.

Calamon: Want to play?

Rika: Anything to take my mind off THAT!

Kari: Is it just me or does Calamon sound exactly like Yukio's Digimon?

Izzy: So I wasn't the only one who noticed?

Impmon: Where're the others?

Rika: Why? Do you want to spend some time with Renemon?

Impmon: Oh, so because I'm a virus type Digimon I can't want to see anyone without having an ulterior motive?

Ken: I just want to know what he's doing to Yolei.

Davis: I think there's a reason that he took her out during lemons…

Ken: AND WHAT ARE YOU INSINUATING???

Davis (innocently): Nothing. Nothing at all. I'm definitely not implying that he's raping your girlfriend as we speak…

Kari (quietly): Davis quit while you're behind.

Ken: I'LL KILL THAT SON OF A BITCH!

(sirens go off)

Jun: We've got lemon sign.

TK: I trust that you enjoyed your break?

Ken: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOLEI???

TK: Nothing she didn't want.

Ken: I'LL KILL YOU, YOU HEARTLESS SON OF A BITCH!!!!

TK: Temper, temper. I didn't do anything she didn't want me to do.

Kari: There's a relief. He didn't touch her, Ken.

TK: (continuing) Of course there were a lot of things she wanted me to do…

Ken: I'LL KILL YOU TK! YOU'RE A DEAD MOTHERFUCKER!

TK: And on that note, Dogbone!

(door sequence)(Door 1 is a digiportal. They cover their ears to block out the terrible English dub music)(Door 2 is Magnaangemon's Gate of Destiny. They pass through it with some concern as to where it goes)(Door 3 is shaped like a lemon (the fruit). It opens with a moan and all kinds of juices spill out)(Door 4 is a normal door guarded by a mallet. As they pass through it the mallet hits each one of them)(Door 5 is the Digimon logo in a circle with a line through it. Each one of them kicks it to open it)

Davis: We've survived one, how bad can the others be?

Rika: You just jinxed it.

I don't own digmon show, but i wsih i owneed CODY!

Cody: Digmon has his own show?

cody expess his lov for KARI!!!!!!

Ken: This spelling represents a brand new low.

Takato: (singing) And I want to know, have I gone too far, have I sunk to a brand new low?

Davis: Yes you have! You sing worse than my sister trying to sing Young Wolves songs to impress Matt!

Jun: I'm right here you know…

yay!!!!

ALL: BOO!!!!

Kari iz at her home, by self and is borred, vrey BORED. She call phone to Cody house and aks him to come over. Cody jump at the great ideya! He put on asftershave on neck and put on shrit andpair of pant. He smile at himslef in mirror for he know that tonight will be SPECIL!!!! He love Kari and hope that Kri love him, not stupid buy named TK. Whenever Cody hear name TK, he get mad and want to punch stuff alot. Anywas, Cody go to KAri house adn get happy. Kari open door and also get happy.

Davis: Jun, could you translate that please?

Jun (translating): Kari is alone and bored. She calls Cody, who hopes that she loves him, not TK. Cody goes over to her house.

Henry: What I don't get is why in God's name would Cody need aftershave?

KARI: Come in Code! I need two talk wit yu!

Davis: It starts

CODY; yes

Izzy: A semicolon? That is just sloppy!

Rika: So it matches his MO.

KRAI: Good, lety go upstair, I need you for smoethign.

Izzy: I've memorized the standard keyboard and the "Y" key is nowhere near the "S" key.

CODY: Ok, let hurry up pretty wooden staris.

All: OOOHHH… pretty.

KARI: OK!(kari jump to cody and cody carry her ot bedroom)

Jun: to bedroom… Oh shit.

CODY; wWhat do yu want to tell me?

KARI: that....that...taht...

Ken: (singing) I can tell you're lyin', cause when you're replyin', you stutter, stutter, stutter, stutter.

CODY: What wrong?

Davis: This entire fic.

KLARI: THAT I LOVE YOU!!!!!

All: Surprise, surprise.

(cody opend mouth in shocks when kari jum,ps on him and kiss lips)

CODY: I never new you love me too....i loved you the frist time i saw your beatiful faace!

KARI: really?

Cody: NO!

CODY: yes.

KARI: Me tooo! Well, what should we do now?

Rika: Let me guess…

CODY: Have bunnie sex!

KARI; great! (take shirt off and tiny bra)

Kari: TINY BRA???

Davis: To compliment the author's tiny brain.

Takato: This seems to be shortly after 02 anyways.

Cody: Then I'm… eeew.

CODY:L you are so pretty

KARI; tahnk you(coady hug kari and cry in happyness. Kari smile in cody arm's.)

CODY: are you sure, you wnat tyo have sxe?

Kari: I'm sorry, could you say that in ENGLISH?

KARI: Definately! You man that i lov!

Davis: Man?

Kari: (as fic self) okay the underage boy.

CODY: ok,(cody take cloth off and throw them all over. Kari stare at cody hot, body)

Izzy: There's that loincloth again.

KARI: you are sexy.

CODY: Yse! I know I am!

KARI: Come tyo me love baby!

Cody: So he admits that I'm shamefully underage but still writes this?

CODY: (lays next to Kari and start lick breast with suck noise. Kari giggle) Is that what you like?

All: NO!

KARI: Tha is what I LVOE!

CODY: how about this?(cody grab Kari breast and lick wildly. Kari groans with so many pleasures. Kari grab cody chest and hug tiht. Cody start to move)

Kari: What…

Cody: The…

Davis: fuck…

Takato: did…

Rika: that…

Henry: mean?

Ken: Whoa, déjà vu.

KARI: DO ME NOW!

All: KILL ME NOW!

CADY: L i love ypou(cody take enormous throb cock and pusah in Kari)

Jun: This is the definition of bad.

KARI: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! YES ! I FEEEL YOU SO MUHC!

Kari: I agree with the "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" But not with the "YES!"

CODY: (moving slowly, while grab Kari buttocks) uh u hu hu h uh uh uh uh uh uh hu u h hu h uh u .....do yuo like that too?

Izzy: Since when does Cody talk like Etemon?

Jun: That's an insult to my Digimon!

KARI: I lvoe anything you do, you are the best in bed...(Cody push cock far into kari, kari scream with hot pleasure pain)

All: (singing) You chose pain for pleasure…

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.... bbee4e.baby

CODY; yuo are so pretty. i love you bresats.

Takato: I somehow doubt Kari likes being called "Bresats". Or is that another person?

HARI; (giggle) i feel you in me.

Kari: So now there's another person here? This is now a threesome?

Takato: Foursome if you count Bresats.

CODY: YES! U HU H UH UH UH U HU HU H UH UH Uhuhuhuh uh u hu hu hu h uh u hu u hu hu h uh uhu hu h uh uhu hu hu ....Cody push in an out like animal. Cody hold onto Kari buttcheeks for dear life)

Izzy: Has anyone ever seen Cody and Etemon in the same room?

Jun: Yes. We all have!

Izzy: Scratch that theory then.

KARI: Oh my god! I nvere ftlet so good before!

CODY: (pulls cock out and lays on top of Kari breats) I love you

Takato: How would he fit?

Kari: See? It's not me, it's "Kari Breats".

KATIR: please don't telll KT! He will get mad!

Davis: So now there's five people?

Takato: Actually, six. There was actually a reference made to Klari earlier, but it was before we decided to start pretending that name misspellings were names.

Henry: This is sounding more like his second fic, ORGY LVOE, by the second.

Jun: There is no second fic, got it? There is no second fic for TK to torture us with.

Henry: Got it.

CADY: I never tell TK!

Takato: The count is now up to 11 participants.

Kari: We missed that many misspellings at the beginning?

Takato: Yep.

KARI: Pleaes lkets not stop, I wanna do more to you!

CODY: well, ok, I have to go home soon, my frozeb dinner will get very cold and I will get very sick,

Rika: And that's a bad thing because…

KARI: (lays next to cody dick and outs it in her mouth) mmmm...mmm....

CODY: You make me feel gresat! I lvoe yu!

Davis: And Cdoy has now declared his luv towards Kair

KARI: (Swirling tongue around cody's big cock) yep, don't ralk for a second, enjoy the lvoe!

Henry: If I see any proof that someone can talk in that position I'll take this back, but that would sound a lot like Kenny from South Park with a sore throat!

Davis: So would someone reading this fic out loud.

Henry: Good point.

CODY: ok. YES!!!!!!!!

Kari: I SAID DON'T TALK!

the end

All: Thank God!

pleaeae review mty storhy! I love yu all my fans!

Cody: Then you must hate us.

I am so good digomn writer!

All: No, you're not.

And I want to say sorry to Dr. Zombie adn Hiakri Chan and Hyperimon because you don't want me to conitnwue!

Jun: They're not the only ones

But I can't help mycselfd! I lvoe CODY@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111 Please underrstand!

I am so goooood writer! I lvoe cody! PlES3e review my stpry!

i lcpvoe you all!

All: But we hate you!

sPAZOID baRNEY LVOES coduy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rika: I told you it was Spazoid.

Takato: And no one said it wasn't.

(Ken has completely broken down and is trying to decapitate himself with a card he borrowed from Takato)

Ken: (slashing the card along his neck) Digimodify, death activate!

TK: And now we eject the now completely insane Ken into the real world where he'll spend the rest of his days in an insane asylum. The Digimon Empress will do the honours.

(Yolei comes out dressed in a modified Emperor suit)

TK: Please push the button labelled K.I.

(Yolei pushes the button and a digiport opens, ejecting Ken into the real world, still babbling like a moron)

TK: Funny what rejection and bad fiction can do to even a genius.

(TK and Yolei leave the room)

Takato: Now I know the meaning of heartless. While we wait for the next torture, maybe we should ask Calamon if there's any way he could get us out of here. I mean if he has powers related to digivolving, then why wouldn't he have powers related to digiports?

Kari: I also have a question to ask him.

Davis: The one about Yukio, right?

Kari: Who says you're stupid?

Davis: Jeff Nimoy, Takari fans, Davis bashers…

Kari: Aren't those all the same?

Davis: Well, Nimoy did add a lot of Takari hints…

Takato: You're telling me! You're just going from the words Pistoffveemon wrote into your mouth, but I've seen it!

(Computer voice: Major fourth wall violation!)

Davis: What now?

(nothing happens)

Davis: That was unexpected. I would have thought it would have…

(Fourth Wall crashes down, revealing ME )

Davis: So that's what the fourth wall is. The line between characters and authors.

ME: Why am I here?

Rika: Ask Goggle-brain here. He had to make a reference to you by name.

ME: Well, I was going to come in here to tell you that my internet connection's been unreliable at best and that you wouldn't be doing the other two until I'm able to access it properly.

All: Thank God!

ME: However, it's a lot better now so I'll get working on those soon.

ALL: NOOOOOO!!!!

ME: I would also like to apologize for what happened to Ken, but this room was getting too crowded and I couldn't keep track of who hadn't spoken for a while.

Davis: So this is a "saving your ass after the fic" kind of thing, right?

ME: More or less

(I vanish using Author Powers)