Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Drifting Pieces ❯ Forgotten Sins ( Chapter 14 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: Yeaomi 
Gennai grieves for the mistakes of the past as it all catches up to him.
Anime/Manga: Digimon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological | Type: Shounen-ai | Uploaded On: 09.19.2010 | Updated On: 09.11.2012 | Pages: 3 | Words: 4.0K | Visits: 295 | Status: Completed
Gennai grieves for the mistakes of the past as it all catches up to him.
Anime/Manga: Digimon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological | Type: Shounen-ai | Uploaded On: 09.19.2010 | Updated On: 09.11.2012 | Pages: 3 | Words: 4.0K | Visits: 295 | Status: Completed
Author’s Note:This fic was originally partially posted at the end of 2010. Since then, I have rewritten every single chapter and done a serious edit. If you have not visited since October of 2010, I recommend that you start over. It’s worth it (05/2012).
Gennai's story makes me sad sometimes. I've got a wonderfully tragic head cannon for him.
Chapter 14: Forgotten Sins
Gennai slowly made his way down the long dark staircase in silence. It was hard for him to imagine just what it took for such a young boy to design and build such an impressive piece of machinery.
Every level was carefully constructed to conserve space, to have a function, and to be as sturdy and impenetrable as possible. The closer to the heart of the base he got, the more the designs seemed to twist and become corrupted as the large inviting halls started to narrow down into dark passages.
What had been going through Ken’s mind as he built this? Had it all really been his own twisted vision or had the designs come to him in whispers in the night?
Despite the prison cells, work rooms, and various rooms covered in cruel looking devices, what bothered Gennai the most were the signs that this base appeared to have originally been conceived for other purposes. The dusty guest rooms, the overly large kitchen and dinning area, and the small details scattered about that showed signs that an effort had once been made to make it all feel like a home.
According to Wormmon, Ken had originally returned to the digital world looking for comfort and companionship. It hurt to think that Ken had not found what he was looking for. Or perhaps it had been taken away from him.
Gennai slowly slipped past the wreckage that lay partially blocking his path, glancing over lingering signs of the battle that had brought the monster down at last. His destination lay just ahead near the broken down core reactor.
He had not been sent by his masters to keep an eye on the boy, but to retrieve something that had been forgotten and neglected. They had made it quite clear that all matters concerning the boy were no longer his to trouble himself over.
Even still, Daisuke’s voice was still ringing out in his head, full of anger and hurt. He hadn’t intended for all of them to know those dark painful secrets. He had intended to brush off the questions of Hikari and Takeru, keeping the past where it belonged like he always did.
He had spent so many years of hiding the guilt and the painful memories that surged each time the Ichijouji boy had met his eyes… Yet when the trusting eyes of Light and Hope had fallen onto him so earnestly, the dam had finally broken and it had all slipped out.
Thankfully, he had kept the presence of mind not to tell them everything. Ryo’s fate, the full force of the spore’s impact, the guardians’ decision, and those memories of a lost and broken child still haunted him.
Carefully, Gennai dropped down into the dark room and looked up at the power source, flickering softly against the darkness.
“The crest of kindness…” He breathed out, cringing inwardly at how tired his voice was starting to sound again. The rejuvenating powers that be were starting to wear off once more. Nothing lasts…
That old familiar gut wrenching guilt threatened to well up in him again as the soft pink glow of the crest fell on him. It looked so delicate in its casing, surrounded by darkness and slowly having its power leeched away and corrupted.
He wondered how the crest could even still manage what little it did considering what it had been through. Exposure to the spore, the dark ocean, the dark whirlpool and this place of cruelty had drained the once magnificent crest down to a whimper of its former self.
A tear came to his eye as he recalled the first time Ken had truly unleashed its power. It had been so beautiful… The way its light had gently wrapped around the boy and the little digimon with such care and kindness…
It had been in that moment that all doubt had been erased from his mind that Ken was more than capable to take care of what needed to be done. In that instant, he had known that this boy was special.
That boy was gone now… He had been too delicate for either world. In his place… What’s left of you, Ken?
“I failed you… I’m so sorry.” Gennai slowly reached up and removed the crest. The reactors had been neutralized and no longer posed a threat now that the meddling forces of Arukenimon were long gone.
“You can rest now, my friend… It’s time to return to where the darkness can no longer find you.” The small crest glimmered in his hand, seeming to flicker in protest as Gennai thought he felt the small crest reaching out in search of its owner. At last, the crest faded and disappeared as its powers dispersed back into the world to join the others at long last.
There was a hum as the energy flow for the engines was redirected past the broken circuit and the lights dimmed. With a heavy sigh, Gennai sat down on the walkway and watched the lights twinkle in the dark as they slowly surged back to life around him.
“It wasn’t supposed to end like this. He had more time. Something must have gone wrong.”
Gennai closed his eyes against the memory. Now was not the time to slip into the past.
“His body had already given out. Only his spirit was hanging on. We all knew that his time was limited.”
“Limited or not, he had more time. His job wasn’t finished yet. It must have been the spore. It must have weakened our influence on him somehow.”
Gennai sighed and shook his head. It was best to just let it come. It always did in the end… It was a memory he had relived time and time again, always wondering if things could have been done differently. If there was something he missed… Something he could have done… The day Ryo died.
His death had been so unexpected and fast… They all knew it was coming. In the real world he would have already been dead, but in here he had been given stolen time.
The very fact that his body had not joined the digital stream immediately was troubling enough.
He could still see it so clearly. Could still feel the weight of it pressing down on his heart.
Gennai had gone searching for information regarding the spore. His search had been fruitless, though he had heard rumors of its origins. He had returned with hope only to find Ken sitting beside the empty shell that had once been Ryo. There was no telling how long Ken had been there, staring down into those lifeless eyes.
Gennai had summoned the guardians right away, panic eating away at his normally calm and controlled demeanor. This was a tragedy that was not supposed to happen. This was not something to be pushed aside and left to the lessons of the world.
The body had not returned to the data stream until the guardians had arrived, breaking what ever force was holding it prisoner. A force that Gennai suspected had come from Ken.
“It does not matter why it happened. The Tamer is safe now and resting, though he is distressed. I believe that he is worried about what will happen to the boy. This is all that matters now. What do we do about Kindness?”
The guardians had been arguing for what felt like hours, debating the nature of this new potential threat. All the while, Gennai waited patiently for orders that he knew he would not agree with.
The longer they argued, the more anxious he became as he realized that every second more was another second the spore had to slowly take root inside of the boy. He could practically see it growing inside him as Ken stared off into the distance, lost in his own thoughts. Thoughts that may not even be his own anymore.
“We cannot leave the child like this. Perhaps if we explain the situation to him…”
“He is far too young to understand. Are we expected to tell a child of his age about the rules and laws of this world? It would be a waste of time. He would not understand. We don’t even know what happened ourselves.”
“He was meant to meet up with the others. They will return soon… Do we still need him?”
“No. The spore has dug too deep. Considering what has happened here, it would be far too dangerous to let it near the other children. They still have their own trials to undergo. If it blooms while he is with them…”
“Is his crest still active?” There was silence.
Gennai could sense them all watching Ken, reaching out to him as they felt for the warm glow of the delicate crest.
Gennai looked to the small child himself and was startled by the distant look in his eyes. There was something there, lurking just beneath the surface, waiting… A chill ran down his spine as he realized that something had always been there, hidden by Ken’s desire to be accepted and loved.
“Gennai.” The guardians had come to a decision. “The child is damaged. He is tainted and dangerous. It’s time to send him home. He has served his purpose and protected our world all that he can. We will lock this world away from him and Kindness will be returned to the stream.”
“You can’t just send him back like this! We’re responsible for this! We allowed this to happen!” Gennai yelled to the empty sky, suddenly enraged at his masters. They had allowed this to happen and he knew it. Had it been morbid curiosity? Did they want to test the limits that a child could be pushed to? Didn’t they know that kindness was one of the most fragile crests? “We have to help him. Please… He doesn’t deserve this.”
He expected to be ignored or told to just do his job, but instead he was met with understanding. “We will do what we can to take away his pain. The spore has dug too deeply and we cannot remove it, but we can stunt it. Perhaps if we remove his memories it will ease his troubles and the spore will cease to grow once in the other world.”
“So you’re just going to take all of this away from him? Make him forget as if it never happened? Everything he’s learned and done here, gone just like that?” Gennai couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“No. We cannot make him forget what he has done here, but we can burry it. His memories of his time here will be hidden like a dream. In time, he may uncover them and understand them as a scar on his past that is already faded, but he will not be affected by them.”
“This is wrong. We should talk to him now. At least give him the choice… Tell him-”
“We do not even know what was done here, Gennai.” The voice crashed down on him, disapproving of his objections. “The best we can do is send him home. As long as he stays away, the spore will not grow and it will not hurt him. Do your job, Gennai, and send the boy home.”
The debate was over and Gennai knew he didn’t stand a chance. Perhaps they were right. Ken would be safe at home with his family. He would remember the good and that was what mattered. It was time to say goodbye.
Slowly, he returned to Ken and knelt down before him. “Ken? Are you with me?”
Ken looked up at him and Gennai fought back a cringe as those deep eyes looked up to meet him. “It hurts, Gennai.”
“I know, Ken. I know…” Gennai gently took his hand and pulled the boy to his feet. Wormmon looked up at the two with tired and trusting eyes. Gennai couldn’t help but feel a wave of guilt and pity for the little virus.
“My friends are going to take the pain away, Ken.” He tried to sound more reassuring on this matter than he felt. “It’s time for you to go home, Ken.”
The small hand pulled from his abruptly.
“Home?” Large wild eyes looked up at him. “Home? To… To big brother? My… Brother…”
“Yes…” Gennai spoke before he could stop himself. “To Osamu.”
“No… No! Ryo is my brother. Ryo loves me. Ryo… Ryo…” Gasps shook the small child’s frame as if he were about to fly apart at the seams.
Gennai waited but the tears did not come. There would be no healing; this scar would run too deep.
The first seeds of doubt touched him as he wondered if maybe they were doing the boy more harm than good by not allowing him time to heal. They were stripping him of the right to make sense of this tragedy and move on in his own way. Spore or not, this child of kindness had proven himself capable of defying immense odds. How could they not give him the chance to fight this new evil? Was the spore really so fearful to them?
Gennai could feel the guardians watching him and becoming impatient. Slowly, he bent back down and looked him in the eyes. “Ken… Forgive me.” A hand brushed across the boy’s temple and slowly, those deep dark eyes lightened as if everything had been suddenly lifted and swept away.
Beside him, Wormmon nuzzled Ken’s leg gently and whispered softly. “Goodbye, Ken… Please don’t forget about me.”
Gennai’s heart ached for the small digimon as Ken disappeared, shifting back across to his own world.
“I’ll be waiting for you.” The little digimon’s antenna lowered as he looked up at Gennai. “He’ll come back someday. He’ll find a way. I just know it…”
“I hope so, Wormmon… I hope that one day Ken is able to heal and forgive us for what we did… He’s stronger than we think. They underestimate him…”
“Ken is stronger than you think.” The echo of his own words startled Gennai and brought him back to the present with a jolt.
Wormmon sat before him, looking up at him with those same determined blue eyes.
After Ken had left the digital world that first time, there had been much talk over what to do with his partner. In the end, rather than reformatting the little virus, they had agreed to simply hide his memories away.
Gennai was unsurprised, however, to learn that Wormmon had eventually remembered all that had happened. A digimon as loyal as Wormmon was could never forget his partner. He wouldn’t be surprised to find that it had been Wormmon’s intense desire to find his partner again that had eventually allowed Ken to remember the digital world in the first place.
Yet, he was surprised to find that Wormmon had not told Ken of what had happened in the desert or of those final moments with Ryo… Perhaps he had naturally sensed that Ken needed to be protected from such harsh times and was simply waiting for the right time when Ken would be ready to hear the truth. Or perhaps Wormmon didn’t know any more than Ken did…
“Wormmon… So you heard? I’m starting to wonder if the whole digital world didn’t hear.” Gennai sighed gloomily. “Are you here to judge me too?”
The little digimon slowly walked up to Gennai and settled at his feet. “No. What happened to Ken back then… It was not your fault. But what they did to him was wrong…” He paused as if searching for the right words. “They left that awful thing inside him… Even though it hurt him… Now I’m losing him and I’m afraid that this time, I won’t get him back.”
Gennai was startled by the little digimon’s words. “Wormmon… You’re right. What happened to Ken was monstrous and should never have been allowed to continue. At this point… I’m afraid that the truth will only hurt him more. Yet we’ve already hurt him so much by just trying to protect him. I think we’re all guilty of that. We tried to shield him from everything and we failed him. We should have trusted him.”
“What do we do?” Wormmon looked to the guardian helplessly. The little digimon had apparently followed him down there seeking guidance just like in the old days. Ken was lost in the dark and Wormmon wanted nothing more than to show him where the right path was again.
“We’ve done so much harm trying to help him already… Maybe this time, we should let him do this on his own?” It didn’t matter if they tried to help him, truth or lies, the boy was not going to come back to them whole. There would be no return for Ken Ichijouji this time. Of this, Gennai was certain. He had looked into Ken’s soul and seen how deep the fracture ran.
“I don’t think he can help himself anymore, Gennai. He’s so alone… He’s always alone. I’m scared that I’m going to lose him again!” Tears filled those large eyes and it was enough to break Gennai’s heart.
“I know, Wormmon… I know. Maybe…” And there was the smallest of hope, flickering in the dark. “This time there is courage.”
Courage and friendship bonded together in one soul. It was appropriate that Courage was the jogress partner to Kindness. After all, one needed courage to be kind in the face of cruelty and one needed kindness to care for a friend. It was a long shot just to hope… Especially when Hope and Light were in such danger. The guardians were willing to let Kindness fall into shadow just to keep the other two safe, but Gennai wasn’t ready to accept defeat just yet.
I have to believe in courage.
Wormmon seemed to be on the same thought process as he nodded wisely then moved to scuttle back up the stairs, apparently pleased with that answer.
Gennai reflected that it must be nice to have such faith in the unknown as he slowly stretched and got to his feet, following the little digimon at a casual pace.
Gennai was halfway up the stairs when a high piercing scream echoed down the halls.
“Ken!” Panic filled him as he raced up the remaining flights in long strides, leaping the rubble and moving with the grace and speed only a true guarding of the digital world could possess.
Gennai burst through the door to Ken’s room, pushing past the other children and came to a stop beside Daisuke. Wormmon was at the foot of the bed already, trembling from the exertion he must have put out just to make it back up the steps so quickly despite his stubby little pods.
The two Ichijouji boys were awake and appeared to be in a very bad way. Ken was sitting up; his eyes empty as he stared off into a horror only he could see. His lips were parted, looking far too dry and cracked for comfort.
Beside him, Kaiser was doubled over, shuddering and making small gasping sounds as he struggled to breathe.
Gennai was about to run to his side when Ken suddenly spoke up in a whisper filled with pain and horror. “I killed him, Gennai. I killed Ryo…”
The guardian froze as a familiar look slowly fell over Ken’s face. That one look told him that everything he had feared had come true.
The memories had returned. Somehow they had made it past the barriers the Guardians had set up to prevent such an event. It was hard to say just how much Ken remembered, but not even Gennai held all the pieces to the puzzle. Only Ken and Ryo really knew what had happened on that horrible day and neither boy was exactly willing or able to breech the subject.
Gennai breathed out slowly. Ken’s statement alone told him that Ken hadn’t remembered everything. The boy was simply reliving that one terrible moment… Trapped in that one moment filled with guilt, fear and uncertainty. A moment when a small boy had suddenly found himself alone in the dark surrounded by demons.
Gennai was about to relax, reaching out in an effort to comfort the distraught boy, when a gasping sound from Ken’s side reminded him that nothing was ever that simple.
There was a part of Ken that apparently did remember everything. A part that knew all the dark secrets that everyone had tried to keep hidden away.
The guardian braced himself as he heard that ragged deep intake of air that threatened to tear through his world.
At long last, all of his sins finally came together as the Kaiser started to scream.
A/N: Chapters 15-17 are still being edited, but they will be posted before the end of this month (may 2012). All new chapters (100% new content) will be posted on a schedule once those have been finalized.
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Disclaimer: According to Wikipedia: Akiyoshi Hongo was the creator of the Digimon concept. Bandai, Saban Entertainment and various other entities that are not me own Digimon. I am in no way making money off of this and am strictly using the characters and world for my own fan based fiction.
Converting /tmp/phpm0SGNW to /dev/stdout
Gennai's story makes me sad sometimes. I've got a wonderfully tragic head cannon for him.
Chapter 14: Forgotten Sins
Gennai slowly made his way down the long dark staircase in silence. It was hard for him to imagine just what it took for such a young boy to design and build such an impressive piece of machinery.
Every level was carefully constructed to conserve space, to have a function, and to be as sturdy and impenetrable as possible. The closer to the heart of the base he got, the more the designs seemed to twist and become corrupted as the large inviting halls started to narrow down into dark passages.
What had been going through Ken’s mind as he built this? Had it all really been his own twisted vision or had the designs come to him in whispers in the night?
Despite the prison cells, work rooms, and various rooms covered in cruel looking devices, what bothered Gennai the most were the signs that this base appeared to have originally been conceived for other purposes. The dusty guest rooms, the overly large kitchen and dinning area, and the small details scattered about that showed signs that an effort had once been made to make it all feel like a home.
According to Wormmon, Ken had originally returned to the digital world looking for comfort and companionship. It hurt to think that Ken had not found what he was looking for. Or perhaps it had been taken away from him.
Gennai slowly slipped past the wreckage that lay partially blocking his path, glancing over lingering signs of the battle that had brought the monster down at last. His destination lay just ahead near the broken down core reactor.
He had not been sent by his masters to keep an eye on the boy, but to retrieve something that had been forgotten and neglected. They had made it quite clear that all matters concerning the boy were no longer his to trouble himself over.
Even still, Daisuke’s voice was still ringing out in his head, full of anger and hurt. He hadn’t intended for all of them to know those dark painful secrets. He had intended to brush off the questions of Hikari and Takeru, keeping the past where it belonged like he always did.
He had spent so many years of hiding the guilt and the painful memories that surged each time the Ichijouji boy had met his eyes… Yet when the trusting eyes of Light and Hope had fallen onto him so earnestly, the dam had finally broken and it had all slipped out.
Thankfully, he had kept the presence of mind not to tell them everything. Ryo’s fate, the full force of the spore’s impact, the guardians’ decision, and those memories of a lost and broken child still haunted him.
Carefully, Gennai dropped down into the dark room and looked up at the power source, flickering softly against the darkness.
“The crest of kindness…” He breathed out, cringing inwardly at how tired his voice was starting to sound again. The rejuvenating powers that be were starting to wear off once more. Nothing lasts…
That old familiar gut wrenching guilt threatened to well up in him again as the soft pink glow of the crest fell on him. It looked so delicate in its casing, surrounded by darkness and slowly having its power leeched away and corrupted.
He wondered how the crest could even still manage what little it did considering what it had been through. Exposure to the spore, the dark ocean, the dark whirlpool and this place of cruelty had drained the once magnificent crest down to a whimper of its former self.
A tear came to his eye as he recalled the first time Ken had truly unleashed its power. It had been so beautiful… The way its light had gently wrapped around the boy and the little digimon with such care and kindness…
It had been in that moment that all doubt had been erased from his mind that Ken was more than capable to take care of what needed to be done. In that instant, he had known that this boy was special.
That boy was gone now… He had been too delicate for either world. In his place… What’s left of you, Ken?
“I failed you… I’m so sorry.” Gennai slowly reached up and removed the crest. The reactors had been neutralized and no longer posed a threat now that the meddling forces of Arukenimon were long gone.
“You can rest now, my friend… It’s time to return to where the darkness can no longer find you.” The small crest glimmered in his hand, seeming to flicker in protest as Gennai thought he felt the small crest reaching out in search of its owner. At last, the crest faded and disappeared as its powers dispersed back into the world to join the others at long last.
There was a hum as the energy flow for the engines was redirected past the broken circuit and the lights dimmed. With a heavy sigh, Gennai sat down on the walkway and watched the lights twinkle in the dark as they slowly surged back to life around him.
“It wasn’t supposed to end like this. He had more time. Something must have gone wrong.”
Gennai closed his eyes against the memory. Now was not the time to slip into the past.
“His body had already given out. Only his spirit was hanging on. We all knew that his time was limited.”
“Limited or not, he had more time. His job wasn’t finished yet. It must have been the spore. It must have weakened our influence on him somehow.”
Gennai sighed and shook his head. It was best to just let it come. It always did in the end… It was a memory he had relived time and time again, always wondering if things could have been done differently. If there was something he missed… Something he could have done… The day Ryo died.
His death had been so unexpected and fast… They all knew it was coming. In the real world he would have already been dead, but in here he had been given stolen time.
The very fact that his body had not joined the digital stream immediately was troubling enough.
He could still see it so clearly. Could still feel the weight of it pressing down on his heart.
Gennai had gone searching for information regarding the spore. His search had been fruitless, though he had heard rumors of its origins. He had returned with hope only to find Ken sitting beside the empty shell that had once been Ryo. There was no telling how long Ken had been there, staring down into those lifeless eyes.
Gennai had summoned the guardians right away, panic eating away at his normally calm and controlled demeanor. This was a tragedy that was not supposed to happen. This was not something to be pushed aside and left to the lessons of the world.
The body had not returned to the data stream until the guardians had arrived, breaking what ever force was holding it prisoner. A force that Gennai suspected had come from Ken.
“It does not matter why it happened. The Tamer is safe now and resting, though he is distressed. I believe that he is worried about what will happen to the boy. This is all that matters now. What do we do about Kindness?”
The guardians had been arguing for what felt like hours, debating the nature of this new potential threat. All the while, Gennai waited patiently for orders that he knew he would not agree with.
The longer they argued, the more anxious he became as he realized that every second more was another second the spore had to slowly take root inside of the boy. He could practically see it growing inside him as Ken stared off into the distance, lost in his own thoughts. Thoughts that may not even be his own anymore.
“We cannot leave the child like this. Perhaps if we explain the situation to him…”
“He is far too young to understand. Are we expected to tell a child of his age about the rules and laws of this world? It would be a waste of time. He would not understand. We don’t even know what happened ourselves.”
“He was meant to meet up with the others. They will return soon… Do we still need him?”
“No. The spore has dug too deep. Considering what has happened here, it would be far too dangerous to let it near the other children. They still have their own trials to undergo. If it blooms while he is with them…”
“Is his crest still active?” There was silence.
Gennai could sense them all watching Ken, reaching out to him as they felt for the warm glow of the delicate crest.
Gennai looked to the small child himself and was startled by the distant look in his eyes. There was something there, lurking just beneath the surface, waiting… A chill ran down his spine as he realized that something had always been there, hidden by Ken’s desire to be accepted and loved.
“Gennai.” The guardians had come to a decision. “The child is damaged. He is tainted and dangerous. It’s time to send him home. He has served his purpose and protected our world all that he can. We will lock this world away from him and Kindness will be returned to the stream.”
“You can’t just send him back like this! We’re responsible for this! We allowed this to happen!” Gennai yelled to the empty sky, suddenly enraged at his masters. They had allowed this to happen and he knew it. Had it been morbid curiosity? Did they want to test the limits that a child could be pushed to? Didn’t they know that kindness was one of the most fragile crests? “We have to help him. Please… He doesn’t deserve this.”
He expected to be ignored or told to just do his job, but instead he was met with understanding. “We will do what we can to take away his pain. The spore has dug too deeply and we cannot remove it, but we can stunt it. Perhaps if we remove his memories it will ease his troubles and the spore will cease to grow once in the other world.”
“So you’re just going to take all of this away from him? Make him forget as if it never happened? Everything he’s learned and done here, gone just like that?” Gennai couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“No. We cannot make him forget what he has done here, but we can burry it. His memories of his time here will be hidden like a dream. In time, he may uncover them and understand them as a scar on his past that is already faded, but he will not be affected by them.”
“This is wrong. We should talk to him now. At least give him the choice… Tell him-”
“We do not even know what was done here, Gennai.” The voice crashed down on him, disapproving of his objections. “The best we can do is send him home. As long as he stays away, the spore will not grow and it will not hurt him. Do your job, Gennai, and send the boy home.”
The debate was over and Gennai knew he didn’t stand a chance. Perhaps they were right. Ken would be safe at home with his family. He would remember the good and that was what mattered. It was time to say goodbye.
Slowly, he returned to Ken and knelt down before him. “Ken? Are you with me?”
Ken looked up at him and Gennai fought back a cringe as those deep eyes looked up to meet him. “It hurts, Gennai.”
“I know, Ken. I know…” Gennai gently took his hand and pulled the boy to his feet. Wormmon looked up at the two with tired and trusting eyes. Gennai couldn’t help but feel a wave of guilt and pity for the little virus.
“My friends are going to take the pain away, Ken.” He tried to sound more reassuring on this matter than he felt. “It’s time for you to go home, Ken.”
The small hand pulled from his abruptly.
“Home?” Large wild eyes looked up at him. “Home? To… To big brother? My… Brother…”
“Yes…” Gennai spoke before he could stop himself. “To Osamu.”
“No… No! Ryo is my brother. Ryo loves me. Ryo… Ryo…” Gasps shook the small child’s frame as if he were about to fly apart at the seams.
Gennai waited but the tears did not come. There would be no healing; this scar would run too deep.
The first seeds of doubt touched him as he wondered if maybe they were doing the boy more harm than good by not allowing him time to heal. They were stripping him of the right to make sense of this tragedy and move on in his own way. Spore or not, this child of kindness had proven himself capable of defying immense odds. How could they not give him the chance to fight this new evil? Was the spore really so fearful to them?
Gennai could feel the guardians watching him and becoming impatient. Slowly, he bent back down and looked him in the eyes. “Ken… Forgive me.” A hand brushed across the boy’s temple and slowly, those deep dark eyes lightened as if everything had been suddenly lifted and swept away.
Beside him, Wormmon nuzzled Ken’s leg gently and whispered softly. “Goodbye, Ken… Please don’t forget about me.”
Gennai’s heart ached for the small digimon as Ken disappeared, shifting back across to his own world.
“I’ll be waiting for you.” The little digimon’s antenna lowered as he looked up at Gennai. “He’ll come back someday. He’ll find a way. I just know it…”
“I hope so, Wormmon… I hope that one day Ken is able to heal and forgive us for what we did… He’s stronger than we think. They underestimate him…”
“Ken is stronger than you think.” The echo of his own words startled Gennai and brought him back to the present with a jolt.
Wormmon sat before him, looking up at him with those same determined blue eyes.
After Ken had left the digital world that first time, there had been much talk over what to do with his partner. In the end, rather than reformatting the little virus, they had agreed to simply hide his memories away.
Gennai was unsurprised, however, to learn that Wormmon had eventually remembered all that had happened. A digimon as loyal as Wormmon was could never forget his partner. He wouldn’t be surprised to find that it had been Wormmon’s intense desire to find his partner again that had eventually allowed Ken to remember the digital world in the first place.
Yet, he was surprised to find that Wormmon had not told Ken of what had happened in the desert or of those final moments with Ryo… Perhaps he had naturally sensed that Ken needed to be protected from such harsh times and was simply waiting for the right time when Ken would be ready to hear the truth. Or perhaps Wormmon didn’t know any more than Ken did…
“Wormmon… So you heard? I’m starting to wonder if the whole digital world didn’t hear.” Gennai sighed gloomily. “Are you here to judge me too?”
The little digimon slowly walked up to Gennai and settled at his feet. “No. What happened to Ken back then… It was not your fault. But what they did to him was wrong…” He paused as if searching for the right words. “They left that awful thing inside him… Even though it hurt him… Now I’m losing him and I’m afraid that this time, I won’t get him back.”
Gennai was startled by the little digimon’s words. “Wormmon… You’re right. What happened to Ken was monstrous and should never have been allowed to continue. At this point… I’m afraid that the truth will only hurt him more. Yet we’ve already hurt him so much by just trying to protect him. I think we’re all guilty of that. We tried to shield him from everything and we failed him. We should have trusted him.”
“What do we do?” Wormmon looked to the guardian helplessly. The little digimon had apparently followed him down there seeking guidance just like in the old days. Ken was lost in the dark and Wormmon wanted nothing more than to show him where the right path was again.
“We’ve done so much harm trying to help him already… Maybe this time, we should let him do this on his own?” It didn’t matter if they tried to help him, truth or lies, the boy was not going to come back to them whole. There would be no return for Ken Ichijouji this time. Of this, Gennai was certain. He had looked into Ken’s soul and seen how deep the fracture ran.
“I don’t think he can help himself anymore, Gennai. He’s so alone… He’s always alone. I’m scared that I’m going to lose him again!” Tears filled those large eyes and it was enough to break Gennai’s heart.
“I know, Wormmon… I know. Maybe…” And there was the smallest of hope, flickering in the dark. “This time there is courage.”
Courage and friendship bonded together in one soul. It was appropriate that Courage was the jogress partner to Kindness. After all, one needed courage to be kind in the face of cruelty and one needed kindness to care for a friend. It was a long shot just to hope… Especially when Hope and Light were in such danger. The guardians were willing to let Kindness fall into shadow just to keep the other two safe, but Gennai wasn’t ready to accept defeat just yet.
I have to believe in courage.
Wormmon seemed to be on the same thought process as he nodded wisely then moved to scuttle back up the stairs, apparently pleased with that answer.
Gennai reflected that it must be nice to have such faith in the unknown as he slowly stretched and got to his feet, following the little digimon at a casual pace.
Gennai was halfway up the stairs when a high piercing scream echoed down the halls.
“Ken!” Panic filled him as he raced up the remaining flights in long strides, leaping the rubble and moving with the grace and speed only a true guarding of the digital world could possess.
Gennai burst through the door to Ken’s room, pushing past the other children and came to a stop beside Daisuke. Wormmon was at the foot of the bed already, trembling from the exertion he must have put out just to make it back up the steps so quickly despite his stubby little pods.
The two Ichijouji boys were awake and appeared to be in a very bad way. Ken was sitting up; his eyes empty as he stared off into a horror only he could see. His lips were parted, looking far too dry and cracked for comfort.
Beside him, Kaiser was doubled over, shuddering and making small gasping sounds as he struggled to breathe.
Gennai was about to run to his side when Ken suddenly spoke up in a whisper filled with pain and horror. “I killed him, Gennai. I killed Ryo…”
The guardian froze as a familiar look slowly fell over Ken’s face. That one look told him that everything he had feared had come true.
The memories had returned. Somehow they had made it past the barriers the Guardians had set up to prevent such an event. It was hard to say just how much Ken remembered, but not even Gennai held all the pieces to the puzzle. Only Ken and Ryo really knew what had happened on that horrible day and neither boy was exactly willing or able to breech the subject.
Gennai breathed out slowly. Ken’s statement alone told him that Ken hadn’t remembered everything. The boy was simply reliving that one terrible moment… Trapped in that one moment filled with guilt, fear and uncertainty. A moment when a small boy had suddenly found himself alone in the dark surrounded by demons.
Gennai was about to relax, reaching out in an effort to comfort the distraught boy, when a gasping sound from Ken’s side reminded him that nothing was ever that simple.
There was a part of Ken that apparently did remember everything. A part that knew all the dark secrets that everyone had tried to keep hidden away.
The guardian braced himself as he heard that ragged deep intake of air that threatened to tear through his world.
At long last, all of his sins finally came together as the Kaiser started to scream.
A/N: Chapters 15-17 are still being edited, but they will be posted before the end of this month (may 2012). All new chapters (100% new content) will be posted on a schedule once those have been finalized.
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Disclaimer: According to Wikipedia: Akiyoshi Hongo was the creator of the Digimon concept. Bandai, Saban Entertainment and various other entities that are not me own Digimon. I am in no way making money off of this and am strictly using the characters and world for my own fan based fiction.
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