Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Empty Heart ❯ One-Shot

Empty Heart

Author's notes have always annoyed me, nobody really cares what the author has to say - right? No, of course not. I'm sure you're already well aware that I own absolutely none of the Digidestined (much to my dismay) but I'd like to call dibs on Ken Ichijouji after 5pm. This is set between Episode #21 and #24 (Oh, look I'm a hardc0re fan now) where the Digimon Emperor has just been defeated and Daisuke and Ken have become DNA jogress partners. Also, I am well aware that the title is rather stupid, but it seemed even stupider to call it Better Man. If you can think of something more appropriate you are more than welcome to inform me. You're also more than welcome to tell me that I should never write again, or that I'm absolutely wonderful. It's your choice.

*

Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain

"It's all my fault!" Ken screamed into the noise of students playing hopscotch and soccer. A few looked over simply to snigger at the boy who had always been considered an outcast to them. He had, after all, requested to be alone on his first day at Tamachi Elementary. He'd claimed to them that it was easier to be alone. At least that way he wouldn't get hurt, they remembered him saying. Ken had been lying then, even to himself, and as soon as the words had left his mouth he knew he'd end up regretting them. Of course he couldn't take it back after throwing it into the faces of so many impressionable youths. They'd granted his false wishes in an instant and hurried off to the other side of the playground, laughing and giggling amongst themselves. Being alone was the one of the worst things Ken could think of right now, and as he sat all by himself under the Cherry Blossom tree he knew it was only because of his actions that he was there instead of out on the soccer field. The only time he ever really spoke to any of his peers now was when they needed answers, or his soccer team wanted him to win for them, or occasionally to defend himself from bullies. Ken was a genius, perfect in nearly every way possible, but he was tainted. Nobody knew how corrupt he was because he rarely spoke to anyone about his interests. 'Or past interests,' he thought to himself. Ken's past held secrets, his future was likely to hold more, and it was only the DigiDestined that knew his biggest lie. At times he felt like he led a double life, at least up until now. There was the evil genius side of him, referred to as Kaizer, and the solitary, shut-off from the world, little boy. People adored the quiet Ken, the polite and innocent boy, but he shut them out, some how refusing to believe that their inferiority made them worthy to be spoken to. No. He shook his head slowly. Those weren't his thoughts. They were those of the Digimon Emperor, Kaizer, the side of him that he wanted to get rid of. The real Ken didn't know how to communicate with people. The real Ken didn't know why he felt so sad. The real Ken hated himself.

Or did he just hate the parts of him that were Kaizer? Ken didn't know what to think anymore. He wanted to run away from his problems and start somewhere new. Like he'd done the first time when he'd escaped into the Digital World. He knew, like the last time, that it wouldn't solve anything. Besides the DigiDestined would think even less of him than they already did. Wait a minute, why did he even care what they thought? They'd just overthrown his reign of the Digital World and here he was hoping that they didn't hate him for being such a monster? A single tear rolled down his cheek. It was all his fault though. Every last bit of it. He'd brought pain to so many people and Digimon just because he thought he was superior to everyone else. He'd been mean and nasty and ruthless to everything and ... what had he been thinking? How could he have thought that he was better than everyone else? He could now see how wrong he had been, though it was too late to fix his mistakes and say sorry to all the people and Digimon he'd hurt. He couldn't talk to anyone about it either because they didn't like him. His mind replayed the faces of the DigiDestined as they sneered at him in disgust as he tried over and over again to destroy their worthless lives. If he had succeeded Ken knew he wouldn't be able to continue breathing, he was barely managing now. It was his fault that his brother, Osamu, was dead too. It was his fault that everything was wrecked. It was all his fault.

Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

A voice interrupted his thoughts, "Hey, loner kid? Could you pass us our ball?"
Ken looked up slowly, a rough looking boy towered over him pointing towards the ball that had landed next to him. His eyes filled with tears. That's all he was to the people here, a smart little boy who couldn't make friends because he wouldn't let them. Ken stood up trying to disguise his tears.
"Could you hurry up, please? We don't need some loser like you holding up our game."
Ken felt his heart tighten. They didn't know anything about him. They didn't care that Osamu was dead, or that he was a horrible person, or that he desperately wanted a friend. None of them noticed he was even there until they wanted him for something.
"Shut up!" Ken muttered softly.
"Oh, the man of mystery speaks. I'd advise you not to get too nasty otherwise my friends and I would have to force you to be quiet. Again. Now we wouldn't want that, would we?"
Ken narrowed his eyes at the boy's sarcasm, "My name is Ken. Ken Ichijouji. Did you even know that? Do you even care that I'm sitting under this tree crying because none of you ever talk to me. You don't, do you? All you care about is your stupid ball and showing off to your equally stupid friends."
The smile on the kid's face hadn't faded, his piercing blue eyes staring at Ken from under his dark hair.
"You're right," he said, shrugging his shoulders in agreement, "I don't care. You're the genius you should be happy. You don't even have to try and do things. Unlike us."
"You're wrong," Ken stuttered, "Just because I'm different from you doesn't mean that it's any easier. It's not, you know. Maybe if you were a little smarter you'd realise how false your accusation is. I have nobody to talk to and even if I tried to talk to someone they'd ignore me because I make them feel insignificant. I'm not superior. In fact I'm probably as normal as you. I know none of you care about any of that, though perhaps this may cause you to care some more."
Closing his eyes Ken threw a punch at the boy, only just connecting it with his lower jaw.
"Hah. You little girl," The boy snarled, "Is that all you've got? I think my little sister could do better than that, faggot," He threw his head back in laughter, "We don't care about you and your stupid little life and no one, absolutely no one like you should touch me. You're going to get it now."
Ken cowered instantly as the boy advanced on him. It was always the same. He cried in pain as he felt the boy's fist slamming into his fragile body. His hair was pushed roughly out of place as he fell to the ground. A few of the boy's friends joined in, eager to release their jealousy by beating up the one person who made them feel stupid. Ken gave up even trying to defend himself. He knew that they'd only hold him down and hit him harder if he struggled. At least that's what had happened the past times.
'This is my punishment,' Ken thought to himself, 'I deserve to be treated like this because I'm such a horrible person.'
Clenching his eyes shut tight he felt every one of their knuckles tearing at his flesh. His entire body burned and ached from where they'd hit him repeatedly. He couldn't make out what they were saying anymore, just that they weren't going to stop any time soon.

"Hey, what's all the fuss over here?" Mr Morisetu asked, breaking through the growing crowd to see a battered Ken lying in the dirt. "Oh my goddess," the teacher whispered, bringing his hands to his head before raising his voice considerably, "Boys get away from him. Now! All of you to the Principal's Office. Immediately."
The boys smiled amongst themselves, their leader especially proud of his latest achievement. He knew they wouldn't get in too much trouble. All they had to do was tell the Principal that Ken had started the fight and they'd be fine.

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

Ken held tightly to the duty teacher as he struggled to stand his broken body upright.
"Ken, are you sure you're alright?" Mr Morisetu asked questioningly, "It's just your face has gone an unnatural colour and you're bleeding all over the place. Is anything broken?"
"No, it's ... I'll be fine," Ken chocked through his tears, "I just need to go to the bathroom and clean myself up a bit."
Mr Morisetu wasn't convinced as he watched Ken stumble uneasily, "Are you sure you're alright, Ken? It's just ... you can barely walk. How about I come with you to the bathroom just to make sure you'll be okay?"
'Great,' Ken said privately, 'That's all I need, a teacher helping me to go to the bathroom.'
"Sure Mr Morisetu."
Ken crossed the playground slowly, being careful not to let his legs give out on him. He didn't deserve someone trying to help him, instead he should have been beaten into unconsciousness. Forever.
'Look at yourself Ken, you're pathetic.'
Mr Morisetu overheard Ken talking to himself, "Now Ken, this isn't your fault. Those boys shouldn't be picking on you like that. I'm sure if you talked to them about it they'd stop doing ..."
"Oh, what would you know? You're not me. You have no idea how much I hate waking up in the morning knowing I have to come here. I hate this place and I hate all the people in it and I hate myself."
Ken pushed Mr Morisetu away and stumbled into an empty cubicle. His legs, exhausted with the effort of it all, gave out on him, sending his body slamming down onto the cold tiled floor.
"Ken?" Mr Morisetu asked, "Ken, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..."
"Just go away Sir. Leave me alone."
The balding teacher sighed and Ken heard his footsteps echo out of the room.
Leaning heavily on the wall, Ken eased himself up onto the toilet seat and allowed a gasping sob to escape his throat. His arms instinctively wrapped themselves around his chest, desperately craving to be held by someone who liked him for the monster that he was. He flinched inwardly as his gentle fingers brushed against his ribs. Despite all of his injuries Ken could only feel the pain radiating from his mind, the accusations that were penetrating every one of the tiny cells circulating through his system. Managing to get himself upright again, Ken stumbled out the cubicle door and checked to make sure he was alone before looking in the mirror. Ken could see why the duty teacher had been concerned. He was a wreck, his black left eye looked horrific against his ghostly white skin and the cuts and bruises that lined his body made it difficult to distinguish what he really looked like. Turning on the tap Ken splashed water on his face, feeling his chest groan in disagreement. He looked for the cause of this pain and found his ribcage horribly discoloured. Redressing himself slowly Ken tried a final weak smile in the mirror and made his way towards the Principal's Office with a feeling of impending doom.

Go easy on my conscience
'Cos it's not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame

Principal Akina was a large man who liked people who followed his way of thinking. Unfortunately for some students Principal Akina's beliefs were very shallow and their ideals often clashed with his. This was the relationship between Principal Akina and Ken Ichijouji. Any decisions Ken made were instantly the wrong ones and the only reason he'd been at the school as long as he had was because of his intelligence and talent in sports. Now that his grades were slowly slipping and his game play was leading to the opposing team scoring, Ken knew he'd be transferred to another school.
"Ahh, Mr Ichijouji," Principal Akina said, looking up from his paperwork, "It's nice to see that you decided to honour me with your presence."
He gestured for Ken to sit in the chair opposite him and Ken followed his command.
"Now. Mr Ichijouji. The other boys have already been in here and have told me what happened. I don't think I need to hear the same story all over again. Do I?"
Ken gulped, "Well, actually..."
"Do I, Mr Ichijouji?" Principal Akina was almost daring him to go against his judgement.
"No, Principal Akina, Sir. It was my fault. I started the fight." Ken answered dismissively.
Principal Akina smiled, "Good. You do realise Mr Ichijouji that this is the sixth time you've been in here for starting a fight this year? This, by far, is the worst one. Did you ever think to stay away from those boys?" He didn't wait for Ken's reply, "No, of course you didn't. I think, perhaps, that you haven't settled in here as well as Osamu did..."
"Leave my brother out of this," Ken muttered coldly.
The Principal clenched his fists, "Ichijouji, look at yourself. Your peers run around calling you all kinds of things, they bash you up after you try and stand up to them and they don't even respect you for what little talent you have. Or should I perhaps say, had? You're a mess. In fact you're disgracing the name of Tamachi Elementary. Looking at your recent digressions I think I'm going to have to transfer you to another school."
Ken, although he expected it, wasn't quite ready for how he'd feel to be told that he wasn't wanted, "Yo...you're tran...transferring m...m...me?"
"That's exactly right Ichijouji. I'm going to ring your parents now and tell them to come and pick you up. After today I don't want to see you on school property. Understand?"
"Where am I going?" Ken let the words hardly appear audible.
Principal Akina laughed in Ken's face, "You're going to Odaiba Elementary. It's the closest school that seems to have a good reputation. Hopefully you'll be able to rediscover your intellect. For your own sake," Shaking his head in disgust he muttered the words Ken always heard from him, "Pity it was Osamu and not you."

Ken felt what little colour he had in his face drain away. Odaiba? He couldn't go there, the DigiDestined went there. He'd be hated before he even walked in the door. It was going to be exactly the same as it had been here. If not worse. He wanted to object and blurt out the millions of reasons why it could be any other school but that one, but his mouth couldn't even form the words his brain was trying to shove through it. It was hopeless. Right then, as he shrunk back helplessly in his chair, Ken knew that his life was going to be even worse than it currently was. He wished for something to happen, for his Principal to have a change of heart, but it was too late, he was already on the phone to his parents. Right then Ken agreed with Principal Akina, it should have been him that died, not Osamu. Ken shook his head vigorously to try and make the bad thoughts disappear. He couldn't. The darkness was engulfing him again.

Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
I'm in pain

Daisuke Motomiya sat at the same table he always sat at during lunch. He had the same food in front of him, the same people around him and the same thoughts in his head that had been swimming around for quite a while now.
"Poor Ken," he breathed.
The DigiDestined looked at Daisuke completely puzzled as to why he'd just mentioned their enemy to himself.
"Uhh, Dai?" Takeru pried into his thoughts, "I know you're entitled to what ever you want to say, but please tell us why you are talking about Ken Ichijouji. I thought we hated him?"
The others nodded in agreement, anxiously waiting to hear the goggle boy's explanation.
"It's just," Daisuke was unsure about what he could tell his friends, most of them were still angry with Ken and all of them were continuing to feel the pain that Ken had caused to them and their beloved Digital World, particularly Takeru. "Well, you see. Umm, about Ken? Do you think that maybe, perhaps, we should go and be friends with him. Well, probably not, but, uhh, he is a DigiDestined after all. And I know we all said we hated him, but I think that maybe, well I could be wrong here. Heh, I usually am. Do you think we were too hasty in our decision? No, of course you don't. Though I think that he may be sorry for what he did. Or maybe not. I don't know."
The others stared silently at him. A few of their mouths hung open in shock as they tried to process exactly what it was Daisuke was trying to say. Ken Ichijouji? Daisuke thought they should be friends with Ken Ichijouji? He had to be joking. Or, wait, maybe Ichijouji had brainwashed him into saying that. No, no. It was the real Daisuke saying this. It really was. No other person could make such a mess of confessing something.
"Err," Hikari tried to form words but all she seemed to be able to do was gape at him.
"Daisuke do you think you may have fallen on your head during soccer this morning?" Takeru joked, trying to lighten the mood.
Daisuke sat up so fast his chair fell to the ground. "I'm serious guys. Do you really think Ken is hiding away, plotting to take over the Digital World again? No, of course he isn't. He's alone and I think we should help him out."
Iori's eyes narrowed, "You're wrong. Ken doesn't need anyone."
The others nodded in agreement, trying to get Daisuke to give in to the popular vote. Eventually Daisuke groaned in frustration and walked angrily away from the table.
Miyako's forehead creased in concern. She had never seen Daisuke so cut up about such a minor issue. Did that mean Daisuke really had a heart under all those layers of jerk?

"Why won't they listen to me?" Daisuke growled angrily, kicking at a loose stone on the pathway, "Ken's all alone out there and all they want to do is have their little popularity vote against him. Well I've had it. I'm ready to go find that Ichijouji kid and invite him to join us."
"You're right Daisuke," Miyako's voice appeared from seemingly nowhere, causing Daisuke to jump, "Everybody deserves a second chance, even someone like Ken and it's not just because he's cute either. I really believe he's sorry for what he's done."
Daisuke nodded in agreement, "I believe that too. I'm going to go find him this afternoon, do you want to come?"
"No," Miyako said firmly, "I think this is something you have to do for yourself."
Daisuke nodded his head in agreement, "You're right and even if the others are going to hate me for it, it won't be all that different than it already is, right?" He asked, looking back up to face Miyako to find her gone, "Woah, I think I better stop eating the cafeteria food."

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

Ken sat on the steps in front of Tamachi Elementary, waiting for his parents to collect him from his school for the very last time. He could already see their disappointed faces in his mind. They were the same ones so many people had expressed to Ken in recent times. Worse yet he had to face the Digidestined this afternoon. The principal at Odaiba had insisted that Ken go for a tour around his new school. His parents were to pick him up and immediately take him to Odaiba Elementary. Sighing openly Ken looked up at the clouds and wished he could get the horrible images out of his mind. He wondered what Osamu would do in his position.
"Osamu wouldn't ever be in this position Kenny-boy," he quickly reminded himself, using Osamu's nickname for him at the same time.
Of course, Osamu was the perfect little boy. Osamu did everything right. Osamu was everybody's favourite. Nobody cares about second best. Especially when second best isn't in the least extraordinary. Ken closed his eyes and smashed his clenched fist into the pavement. Pulling away quickly he sucked on the knuckle he had skinned. It was just another addition to all the injuries he had sustained recently. He stood up as he saw his parents pull in. His mother opened the passenger side door and rushed towards Ken, pulling him into her arms and allowing her tears to flow freely.
"I'm sorry Mama," Ken whispered. He had never wanted to disappoint his parents. He wanted to be a worthy son, like Osamu, but Ken was nothing like Osamu. He hated to see his mother cry, particularly when it was his fault. Which it usually was.
His mother smiled faintly, "Ken. It's alright, we're just happy to hear that you're okay."
Ken tried to hold back the tears that were building up in his eyes.
"It's going to be alright son," Ken's father said, reassuring him by patting him on the shoulder, "God, they made a fair mess this time though."
"My beautiful boy, how could they do this?" Ken's mother was reaching hysterics.
"It'll get better Mama, it doesn't really hurt that much anyway," Ken was thankful that his lie sounded so convincing.
"We best be going then," Ken's father pointed out, opening the car door and motioning for Ken to get in.
Nodding slowly Ken untangled himself from his mother's arms and climbed into the backseat of the car.

Once you've found that lover
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around

"Ken? Ken? Are you listening?" His mother's voice cut through Ken's daydream where he was blowing bubbles with Osamu. Probably the only thing that he could do better than him.
"Yes Mama, I'm listening."
Ken vaguely payed attention to his mother's babblings about what he was to do. She had to leave to get back to work so Ken was to catch the train back to Tamachi. That didn't really bother him. He hadn't really wanted to be seen being escorted by his parents anyway.
Smiling as best as he possibly could Ken kissed his mother goodbye and got out of the car.
"Be good son," His father's voice filled his ears as they drove off towards Tamachi.
Ken straightened his shirt and tried to quell the butterflies that were making their way upwards from his stomach.
"Get a hold of yourself Ken," He said loudly to himself.
With that stern awakening he walked slowly towards the sign outside one of the doors that indicated that the main office was inside. Ken hated new places, they always made him uncomfortable, especially when he didn't know any of the faces that met him when he walked through the door.
"Ahh, Ken Ichijouji I presume?" A rather thin man with a moustache held out his hand to Ken. Ken shook it and nodded.
"Yes I am Ken."
"Good, I'm Principal Mituka," The man looked around as if expecting to find something, "But where are your parents Ken?"
Ken smiled, "They had to go back to work. So they dropped me off and went back to Tamachi."
Principal Mituka scratched his head in concern, "Okay then. Well I guess I'll show you around."
He gestured for Ken to follow him out of the office and into the main corridor.

Ken was growing rather bored of his tour of Odaiba Elementary. It was much the same as Tamachi and his new principal tended to make poor jokes and laugh loudly at them. Ken nodded and shrugged his way through his questions and managed to make it through nearly the whole tour without him noticing that Ken really wasn't paying attention.
"Now this will be your classroom."
Principal Mituka stopped outside a door but Ken continued walking.
"Ken? Hey, over here space cadet," He laughed at his own poor excuse of a name.
Ken retraced his steps back to the doorway, "I'm sorry Principal Mituka, please excuse my rudeness it's been a pretty long day."
His reply was cut off by thunder.
"Looks like we're in for a storm. How about we go inside and you can introduce yourself to the class?"
Ken felt his heart skip several beats, "Alright then."
Principals Mituka asked Ken to stay outside while he went to talk to the teacher and explain the circumstances.
"Okay Ken, Mr. Hamasaki is your teacher's name he's ready for you to go in now."
With that Principal Mituka shook Ken's hand again, wished him luck and headed back to his office.
Ken gulped and prayed silently that it wouldn't be as bad as he could feel it going. Stepping blindly into the classroom Ken opened his eyes to come face to face with his new teacher, "Everybody this is Ken Ichijouji he's going to be joining our class as of tomorrow," Mr Hamasaki patted him on the back and smiled broadly, "Why don't you tell us something about yourself Ken."
Ken looked for the quickest escape route, but with the door now closed he was trapped in.
"Well..." Ken thought of what he could possibly say. He locked eyes with Takeru who immediately turned away to whisper something to Hikari who smiled, "I come from Tamachi Elementary. I transferred today," He looked over at Daisuke who had a ridiculous grin on his face, "I like soccer and computer games. I hope we'll all be good friends."
Most of his new classmates seemed disinterested in Ken's introduction and stared blankly at him, not even listening to what he was saying. The only ones who were truly paying attention were the three Digidestined.
"Oh, well if it isn't Mr. Wonderful himself. Looks like Mr. Wonderful isn't looking quite so wonderful today," Takeru said, loud enough for the entire classroom to hear, including Ken.
The majority of the class, having seen Ken on the genius television program, erupted into giggles at Takeru's joke.
Daisuke stood up and launched himself at Takeru punching him square in the eye, "How dare you," he spat at him before Mr Hamasaki pulled him off the other boy with help from Hikari.
"Now that's enough from both of you," Mr Hamasaki threatened, "Takeru that was completely uncalled for and I don't want to hear you saying things like that again. You need to apologise to Ken now."
Mr Hamasaki turned around to talk to Ken, but he was gone. He had fled the classroom crying and was now running blindly on the street, not caring where he ended up.

I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But love is all around

Daisuke anxiously waited out the final hour of the school day. He had to go and find Ken he knew he had to. His heart had very nearly broken when Ken had walked into the classroom, completely unexpected, in a broken state. He looked miserable almost as if he was about to collapse at any moment. On top of that Takeru had to be a smartass. It wasn't a nice thing to do. Daisuke knew that and he also knew that Ken had the look of loneliness in his eyes. Daisuke had seen it often when he'd stared in the mirror. His supposed friends always teased him and brushed him off when all he was trying to be was a nice guy.
"Just ring dammit!" Daisuke groaned in frustration.
His classmates giggled at him. Daisuke was really the class clown. He was a bit of a jerk and a complete idiot, oblivious to the obvious, as Hikari had put it once during gym.
Mr Hamasaki raised an eyebrow at Daisuke, "Do you have something you'd like to add Mr. Motomiya?"
Daisuke slumped back in his chair in defeat, "No Mr. Hamasaki. I'm sorry for interrupting the class."
Mr. Hamasaki turned back to the blackboard and the rest of the class turned back to their workbooks. Daisuke looked out the window, the rain was coming down pretty heavily and if Ken were out in it he'd get all cold and wet. Collecting his things together Daisuke decided that he'd had enough of this and he didn't care if it was going to earn him one hundred days of detention, he was going to go and find Ken.
He picked his bag up off the floor and ran as fast as he possibly could.

Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

Exhausted Ken collapsed on green grass having found his way to an empty park. Rain had started pouring down from the sky and Ken hid his puffy face away from it in his arms. He'd deserved the remark from Takeru he knew he did. It still didn't take the sting out of his words though; they hurt almost as much as his bruised body. His breathing started to slow after having exerted himself well past his athletic capabilities, but his gasping sobs were still filling the air. He could feel his body shivering in an attempt to keep him warm, but it wasn't really working as his clothes were plastered to his skin. They all hated him. Everyday was going to be exactly the same if he went to Odaiba. They'd throw rubbish at him at lunchtime and trip him up when he walked down the hall. Nobody would be friends with him because he'd be the loner kid in the corner. It would always be like that. Forever and ever and ever.

Hugging his arms to himself Ken squinted his eyes to try and make out the figure that was running towards him. It was impossible in the rain. He eventually gave up trying and waited for the approaching person to get closer.
"Hey.. Ken?" It was Daisuke. Ken knew it. It was Daisuke coming to tell him how much he hated him. He hid his face away from the boy.
"Ken, hey, buddy it's okay. I'm not here to do anything mean. It was really out of line what Takeru did," Daisuke knelt down beside him, his wet skin brushing against Ken's.
Ken looked at Daisuke to try and figure out if he was lying or not, but his face seemed very sincere.
"Ken, do you really think I skipped class to come down here and tell you horrible things? No, of course not. I'm here because I saw loneliness in your eyes and I know how that feels."
Ken thought he'd heard wrong, "You came to find me?" He whispered, tears forming in his eyes.
"Yes exactly. Ken, I like you, a lot and if you won't be my friend I'm just going to have to make you." Daisuke giggled nervously, "You're a Digidestined dude and I want you to be apart of us."
"But the others.." Ken's tears were creating tracks on his pale cheeks, "They hate me, and they'd never want me around."
Daisuke paused for a moment, "So, okay, they may not like you Ken. I do. That's all that matters and if they start being mean to you I'll be there to protect you."
Ken smiled genuinely through his tears for the first time in a very long time, "You will?"
Daisuke nodded, "Yeah, I'll even kiss it better."
With that Daisuke wrapped his arms around Ken and gently kissed the bruises on his face.
"You know?" Ken choked through his tears, "I have a lot of other bruises in other places too."
Daisuke pulled away for a second, "Really? Well, let me at them then."
Ken giggled wiping his tears away, "Technically it would be illegal for that to happen here."
Daisuke looked up at the sky, "You know we really ought to get out of this rain because you might get sick."
"What does it matter if I'm sick?" Ken said slowly.
"It matters because if you're sick I won't get to see you and if I do see you I could sick and we wouldn't want that and if I can't see you then I'll get sad and nobody likes a sad Daisuke."
Daisuke's explanation had to be replayed in Ken's mind several times before he figured out what it was that he was trying to say.
"Well where can we go to get out of this rain then?"
Daisuke thought for a moment, "We can go to my house, it's not all that far away. You can even stay the night if you like."
Ken hugged Daisuke forcing the air out of his lungs, "You're a wonderful person Daisuke Motomiya to do something like that for someone like me."
Daisuke loosened Ken's grip slightly, "Ken, for you I think I'd do almost anything."
Ken suddenly felt that maybe his world wasn't going to end and that perhaps there was still hope for him tomorrow and the next day and the next. He held onto Daisuke's hand and brought his face close to his, "Thankyou Dai-chan," he muttered as he kissed the other boy, their wet bodies brushing up against each other as the rain continued to pelt down.

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doin' all I can
To be a better man