Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ EXPRESS YOURSELF: Gutter Brain ❯ Gutter Brain ( Prologue )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

"Geniuses aren't really that bright, are they?" Jyou smiled, a hint of nostalgia playing in his eyes. He'd managed to get his genius. Unfortunately, Daisuke hadn't been that lucky. "It's all up to you, Daisuke."

"I don't want it to be up to me," Daisuke wailed. "It's always up to me. Daisuke, do this. Daisuke, do that. Daisuke, save the world." He sighed another of his dramatic sighs he was becoming such an expert at. "Why can't someone else do it?" He pulled a face. "Why can't he do it?"

Stupid Ken. Stupid, blind Ken. Stupid, blind, naive Ken. Stupid, blind, naive, completely gorgeous Ken. Daisuke shook himself out of the daydream he could already feel himself drifting into. Jyou was right. Jyou was always right. He had to confront Ken. He had to make the first move. But it wasn't going to be easy...

"And what happens if he says no?" Daisuke pouted. "What if he looks at me with complete disgust? What if he never wants to talk to me again?"

"That won't happen," Jyou insisted. "Ken would never cut you out of his life. You're too important to him. Even if he didn't feel the same way about you, he would never hate you for feeling that way." Daisuke looked at him, chewing his lip thoughtfully. "Although, I'm sure he does feel the same," Jyou added quickly.

"Yamato and Taichi were good friends," Daisuke whispered. Jyou immediately fell silent. Mentioning Yamato and Taichi was the quickest way to kill any conversation. The two didn't even speak to each other any more, not after some badly judged and drunken confessions. "I think I could do it," Daisuke continued. "I usually confront my problems head-on." Jyou smiled in agreement. "But after seeing what happened to those guys..."

"It scared you," Jyou nodded sympathetically. "Nothing to be ashamed of. It would have put me off talking to Koushiro if we hadn't hooked up before it all happened."
Daisuke grimaced. "See, you're admitting you think it's a bad idea," he challenged. "You wouldn't do it. And you always tell me not to do anything you wouldn't do."

"Stop twisting things, Dai," Jyou sighed. "You're trying to be awkward and you know it. What I was saying was, if the whole Taichi and Yamato thing had happened before I had the guts to talk to Koushiro, I might of chickened out. But it wouldn't have stopped Koushiro feeling the way he felt about me. And it wouldn't have stopped me feeling the way I felt about him. Do you see what I'm saying?"

Daisuke nodded and let out another of those dramatic sighs. "Guess so," he whispered. "But it doesn't make it any easier." Jyou gave his shoulders a gentle squeeze and Daisuke smiled, grateful for the support. He was going to need all the support he could get.




Ken was packing. He knew that much. It was only a matter of time before he left for University. Daisuke found, to his surprise, that tears welled in his eyes just thinking about that little detail. This was definitely getting worse. His feelings were definitely getting stronger. Most times he saw him, it was all he could do to stop himself declaring his undying love or jumping on him. It really depended on what mood Daisuke was in. Or what Ken was wearing.

"Just a moment," Ken called through the door. The sound of his silky voice was enough to make Daisuke balk. He spun around, ready to run away. He couldn't face Ken. Not right now. It was too hot to think straight.

"Hey, Dai," Ken sighed, a weary smile on his face. Daisuke turned to the now open door and almost tripped over his own tongue. Ken was dressed in baggy pants, a loose basketball shirt clinging to his moist skin. Sweat shimmered on his brow and there was a notable dark patch spreading from the neck to the chest of the loose fitting shirt. "Sorry, our air conditioning's out," he explained, noticing Daisuke staring at his shirt. "And I've been pretty busy."

Daisuke followed Ken inside and sat on the couch while Ken fetched them both a soda. "Air conditioning," Daisuke quietly cursed himself. "That's why he's sweating. Not anything else. Certainly not what you were thinking. Head out of the gutter, Dai."

"Talking to yourself?" Ken smiled, bending over to hand Daisuke his drink. Daisuke nodded, then winced at how easily Ken seemed to accept this explanation. Daisuke was sure his friend must have thought he was crazy. "Hope it's not too hot in here." Daisuke almost snorted at the implications the word 'hot' had on his mind.

Ken stood in the middle of the room, snapping at the ring-pull on the can. He brought it to his lips, standing in profile to Daisuke, tilting his head back to gulp thirstily at the liquid. Daisuke sat open-mouthed, taking in Ken's slender form. He silently wished it were something else Ken were drinking with such enthusiasm. "Head out of the gutter," he scolded himself again.

"What? Did you say something?" Ken asked, dropping the now near empty can on the table. Daisuke shook his head and Ken narrowed his eyes suspisiously but let the matter drop. "So, did you come to help me pack?"

The words stung at Daisuke. Less than a week, now. Six days. Six days to tell Ken how he felt. He had wasted so much of their time. Time they could have spent together. That was, if Ken felt the same way. But he couldn't let Ken leave without telling him how he felt. He had to get it off his chest.

"Actually," Daisuke grinned. "I wanted us to go out. You can't sit and pack for the next six days." Six days. Six days left. "You should get out."

Ken sighed. "I've got an awful lot to do, Dai," he smiled weakly. "I don't think I can just take the afternoon off on one of your mad whims." Daisuke gave him the tried and tested puppy-dog-eyes look. "Don't look at me like that. Dai!" The eyes didn't let up. "Fine! But I'm a mess. I'll have to shower and get changed first."

Daisuke smiled brightly. "Fine, you go shower," he chirped as Ken left the room. "Headoutofthegutterheadoutofthegutterheadoutofthegutter!"




"Where are we going?" Ken asked again. Daisuke smiled but remained silent. He could see Ken narrow those expressionate violet eyes and swallowed down a chuckle. Ken often teased him, saying he had no patience, driving him to point of insanity by holding onto usually insignificant details until the last moment.

The shift in power gave Daisuke a strange feeling. He wasn't usually able to infuriate Ken to quite the same effect he was that day. He knew Ken was taking it in good humour. When he found out where they were going, this would all be forgotten, not because their destination was that exciting but because this simply wasn't important. Still, that powerful, confident feeling wouldn't leave him. Visions of him being able to exercise that advantage physically danced around his mind.

"Head out of the gutter," he sneered to himself. Ken stopped and looked at him blankly. Daisuke could feel his cheeks turning a deep shade of pink. "I, er, said, er, watch out for that gutter." He pointed at a manhole cover several feet to Ken's left and not at all in his path. Ken raised a sceptical eyebrow but Daisuke gave him another blinding grin. Ken shrugged and continued walking.

"Just tell me where we're going, Daisuke," Ken mummered. Daisuke studied him, trying to catch a glance at his eyes. Ken walked with his head down, very different to his usual, confident manner, so Daisuke could only see the dark hair covering his face.
"This is really bugging you, isn't it?" he grinned, trying to keep the triumph out of his voice. Ken looked up and noticed Daisuke's grin.

"Are you trying to stress me out?" he snapped. "'Cause I really don't need that when I'm moving in six days." Six days. "Things are tough enough at the moment."

"Me? Trying to stress you out?" Daisuke gasped, trying to fill his voice with horror. It worked as Ken couldn't help but smile. Still, it was a painful smile and it filled Daisuke with a horrible, gnawing feeling. He tried to cover it, simply for Ken's sake. "I'm just gonna treat you to dinner, alright?" Ken smiled gratefully. "The real surprise is after dinner," he quickly added. Ken once again narrowed his eyes.




"You know I don't like surprises," Ken sulked. He picked at his salad but he had barely eaten any of it. Daisuke was beginning to feel very guilty but was determined not to give in.

"Stop pouting," he grinned. "I'm not gonna tell you. Just give up and eat your stupid dinner." Ken sighed but obeyed, taking a large mouthful. Daisuke had already polished off most of his own. "Good noodles," he mused. "Really good noodles." He never really had much of a passion for cooking. Sure, he loved to eat, but cooking was a whole different thing. It hadn't been until he and Yamato had spent that day baking Sora's cake that he had discovered just how much he enjoyed it. Yamato being there certainly hadn't damaged his enjoyment of that day. Yamato. Yamato and Taichi. Six days. That gnawing feeling was getting worse.

"Earth to Daisuke," Ken called gently. Daisuke snapped back to attention. Ken was looking at him, concern brimming over in those violet eyes. His salad was gone, presumably eaten. Daisuke wondered how long he had been day dreaming. "I'm just going to find a bathroom, 'kay?"

Daisuke nodded. "It's downstairs," he smiled. "You want dessert?" Ken shook his head. Daisuke thought he wouldn't. Ken never ate too much and he was probably eager to find out his surprise. "Shall I get the check, then?"

"Yep, sure you don't mind paying?" Daisuke smiled brightly. "Won't be a sec then. Just going down."

Daisuke watched him, waiting until he was out of ear shot. "Going down?" he mused out loud. "Head out of the gutter!" He banged his head against the table, narrowly missing his drink. Many people stopped to stare. "Head out of the gutter!"




"So, we've eaten," Ken sighed. "Do I get told yet?" When Ken had returned to the table he had gotten a lot of strange looks, although Daisuke wasn't sure he noticed them. Daisuke, of course, had gotten far more and he was sure he could feel a bruise rapidly forming on his sore forehead. "At least tell me if I'm properly dressed."

"You're so vain," Daisuke couldn't help but sing, mainly because he knew it would infuriate Ken even more. "You probably think this song is about you."

"I do not think that song, or any other song, is about me," Ken roared. "I just want to know where we're going. Is that really so much to ask?" Daisuke looked at him, stunned and slightly afraid. Then he began to shake with supressed laughter. Ken glared at him icily but he couldn't help himself. He practically exploded in giggles, leaning over in an attempt to breathe properly. "Shut up, you moron," Ken hissed but his voice was full of mirth and soon he was doubled over too, tears of laughter running down his cheeks.

"We are a pair," Ken gasped as their laughter died down. "I'm gonna miss this." Daisuke stopped immediately. Six days. Six days left. It was so little time.

"Way to ruin the mood, jerk," he sighed. Ken sighed as well and they stood in the town centre, quiet and comtemplating their separate futures.

"I did ruin the mood, didn't I?" Ken grinned. Daisuke gave him a playful punch on the arm and they continued their trek across the square.

"I thought we'd try something a bit different," Daisuke mused. "You know, since you're going and all." Six days. "Just a last night of stupidity before you become Mr. University." Ken nodded slowly, as if analysing Daisuke's words. "But you gotta trust me on this. You will enjoy it."

"I'm sorry," Ken whispered, stopping. "I'm really sorry, Dai." Daisuke stopped and turned to him. He looked ashamed, as if he had done something awful that consumed him with guilt. "I'm sorry I'm leaving you, Dai."

"No!" Daisuke yelped and Ken stared at him, puzzled. "No, don't start that mushy crap now. We'll deal with that in six days." Six days. "Tonight, we're just young, free and single." Daisuke was surprised how that last word stung him slightly. A part of him already knew, he guessed. He couldn't do it. He'd left it all too late. How could six years turn to six days so quickly? "Anyway," he went on. "You're not leaving me. You're getting on with your life. You're moving on. We'll always be in touch. But now you need to move to that next stage. Get your qualifications. Get a good job. Then get an even better one. But I'll always be there for you. Always ready to ask to borrow some money."

Ken smiled, his eyes full of sorrow. "Shut up," he whispered. "No mushy crap. We'll deal with it in six days." Daisuke wished Ken would stop mentioning how soon it was that he was going to have to say goodbye. It was like he was counting the days.




They walked the rest of the way in silence, Daisuke leading slightly. He was glad for this. He didn't want his voice to falter as he spoke or Ken to see the tears that occasionally spilled over. This was hard enough without Ken seeing what he was going through. His friend was probably already scared of leaving his home and moving so far away. He didn't want to make Ken feel worse than he probably already did.

"I don't get it," Ken mumbled. Daisuke turned to stare at him, taking in the confusion on his perfect features. "Where are we going? I'm gonna have a night out in Trade Park?" He gestured to their surroundings, the many warehouses that stretched out around them. "What were you planning? Having me work in a factory, packing boxes? Nice leaving gift, Daisuke," he teased.

"We're going to a nightclub," Daisuke announced casually. Then he continued walking.
"Ah, finally, the big mystery is revealed," Ken cried. There was a pause and Daisuke guessed this was confusion dawning once again. Ken grabbed his arm, spinning him around gently so they were face to face. "A nightclub? But the strip is back near the restaurant. We've been walking for ages in the opposite direction."

"It's a new nightclub," Daisuke smiled sweetly and continued walking. He heard Ken sigh loudly behind him and follow.




"You really do want me to work in a factory, don't you?" Ken asked in amazement. It was true. At first glance the tall building just seemed like every other warehouse in the run down area. But Daisuke knew it was perfect. He was going to give his friend a sending off he wouldn't forget.
"C'mon," Daisuke urged. "The others will be waiting." He led Ken down a dark alley beside the building and noticed with delight that Ken moved closer to him, obviously unnerved by their strange new surroundings. "Head out of the gutter," he hissed.

"What?" Ken whispered back, not paying much attention. Even in the dim light, Daisuke could still see the apprehension in those eyes. "Sorry, Dai. Did you say something?" Daisuke shook his head, grateful not have been heard. "Are you sure you know where we're going? I really don't want to get mugged." Daisuke laughed softly. "Oh, I'm glad you find this funny," he growled. "Are the others really inside?"

"You ask too many questions," Daisuke grinned. "Look." He pointed around the corner. The back of the building was completely different to the front. There were strong lights focused on large, steel double doors, guarded by a very bulky looking bouncer.

"This isn't making me feel any better," Ken admitted, taking another step towards Daisuke. "What is this place? I've never heard of it before."

"It's members only," Daisuke explained. "But I know the guy who runs it." Ken gave him a curious look. "Don't ask," he grinned.

They approached the large man and he quickly recognised Daisuke. He grinned broadly, a soft smile that seemed to contradict everything about him. "Daisuke!" he called, holding out a hand which Daisuke took. He felt himself being pulled forward into a bear hug and resisted smirking at the expression on Ken's face. "You're really not dressed the part, are you?" The man laughed but Daisuke merely shrugged. With another throaty laugh, the man opened the doors and stood back, allowing Daisuke and Ken to enter.

"What was all that about?" Ken snapped. "I asked if I was dressed for this and you started calling me vain!"

"Relax, I'm dressed just the same as you," Daisuke shrugged. "If you stand out like a sore thumb, I will, too." This didn't seem to comfort Ken at all but Daisuke continued leading them down the dimly lit corridor.

Two lights designed to look like candles outlined the next door and Daisuke stole a glance at Ken, wanting to see how his friend was reacting. That apprehension had turned to all out fear now, as he ran a finger along the chains and shackles that adorned the walls. "What is this place?" he whispered. Daisuke knocked on the door three times, then gave Ken's arm a reassuring squeeze. "Daisuke," he whispered, the fear seeming to be replaced by curiousity. "Where are we?"

The door opened with a loud crack that made them both jump. Daisuke wasn't looking at the bizarre sight in front of them. His attention was solely focused on Ken. "Oh my God," Ken whispered but his voice was drowned out by the shrill, loud music that engulfed them. Daisuke watched his lips carefully, trying to figure out what he was saying. "What the f..."

Ken took a step back but Daisuke grabbed his arm and pulled him forward. "It's a bit quieter where we're sitting," he bellowed over the noise. Ken didn't seem to hear him. He looked like a frightened rabbit, eyes wide, ready to run at the first sign of danger.

The club was enormous. Daisuke had seen it before, when it had first been bought and then as it was being refurbished. But he'd never seen it filled with people. The dance floor was spilling over, people writhing against each other, bodies grinding into each other in time with the music. The raised platform was filled with people as well. Usually at clubs, only the most confident exhibitionists danced in front of everyone but, to come to a club like this, everyone was confident and people swarmed around the edges of the stage, ready to jump up should a space clear. The bar, of course was buzzing. At least that didn't surprise Daisuke.

"Don't look scared, pretty boy," somebody purred beside Daisuke. He spun around to see a very elaborately dressed drag queen eyeing Ken up and down, his vision lingering on Ken's crotch. Ken's eyes seemed to pop out of his head in surprise. "We won't hurt you," the stranger reassured. He was dressed in a tall green wig with the longest false eyelashes Daisuke had ever seen. His barely there outfit consisted of thick, strategically-placed leather bands. He toyed with a whip in his hand. "Well," he continued. "Not much."

"He's with me," Daisuke hissed, placing himself between Ken and his pursuer. "And I'm not willing to share." He took Ken's hand, which, he noted, was shaking, and led him away. After a few feet, sure they had escaped, Ken stopped him.

"You brought me to a S&M club?" he gasped. Daisuke had expected him to be furious but instead his friend looked offended. "I don't get it. Why? Why would you think I want this?"

"I didn't think you'd want this," Daisuke quickly corrected him. "I just wanted to do something completely out of character. I wanted you to remember." He was still struggling to be heard over the music.

"I'll always remember," Ken assured him as gently as he could when he was being forced to bellow. "With or without leather and whips. I'm not going to forget you, Dai."

"I know you won't forget me," Daisuke smiled. "And I said, no mushy crap. This is a fun night." Six days. "We'll deal with the other stuff when you're leaving." Six days left.

They continued past the bustling bar, Daisuke keeping a tight grip on Ken's arm. At least this time he didn't have to worry about Ken hearing him when he cursed himself for the thoughts that this simple, innocent touch inspired in his head. At the far side of the room were a row of doors, each padded with red velvet cushioning. Daisuke pressed a small doorbell beside the second from the left. "What's this?" Ken asked. "You got us a private room?" Daisuke nodded triumphantly.

Koushiro opened the door, smiling broadly. He stood aside, allowing the boys to enter. Daisuke sighed in relief as the majority of the noise seemed to be blocked as the doors closed. He often had his own music blasting at intolerable levels but this volume took some getting used to. Ken seemed just as relieved. "Well, Daisuke," Koushiro grinned. "You've out done yourself this time. Where did you hear about this place?"

"I know the guy who runs it," Daisuke shrugged. All eyes turned to him, each echoing the same expression. "Don't ask," he grinned sheepishly.

Koushiro sat down beside Jyou, of course, leaning back into his chest. Both were wearing black. Daisuke had let everyone in on the plan as soon as he had thought of it and Koushiro and Jyou had been the most nervous. They had asked what they were supposed to wear. Daisuke had told them to be as wild as they wanted but, if they weren't feeling adventurous, black was a safe bet.

Mimi and Sora had been the most enthusiastic. Mimi had even announced she had always wanted to come to a club like this, which had cost her a week of teasing and jokes about closet masochists. Both had gone all out when it came to getting dressed. Although they seemed tame compared to some of the party-goers, they were still being adventurous for their first time. Sora wore tight black leather pants Mimi had picked out for her with an almost sprayed on crop top. Her hair was pulled back into wild bunches and she had so much eyeliner on Daisuke was surprised she could open her eyes.

"Here's to Daisuke," Mimi yelled, standing up to reveal the fact she was only wearing a PVC bikini. "Who has the world's weirdest connections. But we love him anyway." She handed the late comers a shot glass of clear liquid each. "And to Ken," she continued. "For giving Daisuke a chance to use those weird connections." Everyone, including Ken, laughed and threw back their drinks. Daisuke could only manage a weak smile. Six days left.




"Please, Dai," Ken begged, his words slurred. "I don't wanna go out there alone." He pointed down at thin mark on his arm where the drag queen they had previously encountered had tracked him down and shown him just how to use a whip. Ken had, in a drunken stupor, been quick to tell this stranger that he was an expert with a whip from his days as Emperor. The transvestite hadn't understood what he was being told but seemed suitably impressed. Koushiro had dragged Ken away before he could babble himself into even deeper trouble.

"I need you to protect me," Ken continued. "Please, Dai, you're my saviour." Daisuke perked up a little at this. "You're my guardian angel against men dressed as women." Not quite what Daisuke had been wanting to hear. He had been looking forward to this for ages. A chance for him and Ken to let their hair down but there was, as usual, an ulterior motive.

He was still convinced he would never be able to tell Ken his true feelings. Not in six days. He had hoped, drunk and disorderly, the two might have fallen into each other's arms. Then he had decided to stay sober, to increase the chances of him and Ken leaving as a couple, even if it was for only one night. But watching Ken laugh and joke with the others, relaxing and forgetting all the stress of the past few days, he knew he couldn't take advantage of him in that way. He decided to remain sober anyway, simply so he could protect and watch out for the one he loved.

"If you don't come out there with me, I'll have to go alone," Ken whined. He flopped down on the couch, resting his head on Daisuke's shoulder. "I don't wanna. They're scary. You bought me here. You can look out for me."

Daisuke shook his head. "I'm not in the dancing mood right now," he explained gently. "Maybe later." Ken wailed dramatically and flopped down further in the couch, burying his face in Daisuke's crotch. Daisuke yelped loudly. "Head out of the gutter!" he practically screamed. "And head out of the crotch!" Ken looked up, surprised by this sudden outburst, and Daisuke quickly slipped off of the couch.




"You gonna hide in there all night?" Jyou called softly through the cubicle door. "'Cause there's a bit of a queue forming." His voice dropped barely above a whisper. "And I think some of them want to... You know? Do stuff besides use the bathroom!" Despite himself, Daisuke giggled at the shock and horror in Jyou's voice.

He slowly opened the cubicle door and there was a cheer from a group of girls in the corner. "Oh my God, did I hide in the girl's bathroom?" Daisuke whispered as Jyou dragged him from the room. Jyou simply pointed to 'Unisex' sign on the door as they left.

"He's emerged then?" Koushiro grinned. He was swaying slightly, a drink still loosely gripped in his hand. "I thought he was hibernating." Daisuke noticed Jyou roll his eyes as Koushiro erupted into manic laughter at his own joke.

"Where's Mimi and Sora?" Daisuke asked, trying to stretch the time before Jyou gave him another lecture. Jyou pointed to the bar where, in the midst of a large group of people, he could just about identify wild red bunches sprouting from somebody's head. Then Jyou pointed at the stage. A man was on hands and knees, his hands bound behind his back, with Mimi directly in front of him, shaking her ass at him in the most tempting manner a drunk can muster.

"You know what I'm gonna say, right?" Jyou sighed. Daisuke nodded. "Then I won't say it." This surprised him. Jyou passing up the offer to lecture him?

"I can't do it," Daisuke admitted. "Not like this." Jyou gave him a hopeful look. "Not ever." Placing a comforting arm around his shoulder, Jyou guided him back to the private room Daisuke had rented for the night.

Ken was still sprawled across the couch but he leapt up when he realised Daisuke was back. "Daisuke! Where did you go?" He dashed over to the red head and threw his arms around his shoulders. Daisuke was taken aback. He struggled out of Ken's grip and pushed the boy back, gripping his shoulders and holding him at arm's length. "I was worried," Ken sniffled.

"I'm gonna go home, okay?" Daisuke told him. "You stay, Jyou will take care of you. I'll see you soon, okay?" Ken looked at him, then at Jyou, then back at Daisuke. He shook his head violently.

"I don't want you to go," he sighed and Daisuke opened his mouth to speak. Ken cut him off. "If you're gonna go, you're gonna go. I'm sure nothing I can say will make you want to say. But I'm coming too." Daisuke smiled weakly and shook his head. "No, Dai, I'm coming and that's final! Not open for negotiation." Daisuke shrugged and nodded. "Okay then," Ken smiled brightly. "Take me home, Daisuke."




Daisuke hadn't slept at all that night. He was finally drifting off at nine in the morning when the phone rang. He groggily reached for the receiver. "Ken?"

"No, it's Jyou," came the reply. "Just wanted to make sure you were okay." Daisuke grunted in response. "That bad, huh? Look, Koushiro and I will come over and we'll talk. I refuse to let this lie. You know that, Daisuke. It's pointless trying to stop me." Daisuke grunted in response. "We'll come over at lunch. That okay?" Daisuke grunted in response. "See you then." Daisuke dropped the phone back into its cradle and allowed himself to fall asleep.




"Daisuke, open the damn door. Now!" It was Koushiro's voice that finally woke Daisuke. He rolled out of bed, landed on his feet and stomped across the apartment. It was so quiet now Jun had left home and both his parents had returned to work full time. Still, he missed having somebody to open the door and answer the phone for him when he was asleep.

He pulled the door open and Koushiro stomped past, his face reflecting Daisuke's mood. He disappeared into the kitchen and Daisuke heard him angrily cursing Daisuke for not having enough water in his kettle. "Ignore him," Jyou shrugged. "He's very hung-over. He just needs a cup of coffee."

They flopped silently onto the couch and Koushiro soon joined them, a cup of coffee clutched tightly in his hands. "You take him home?" Koushiro asked, his voice thick with sleep. Jyou had obviously dragged him there kicking and screaming. Daisuke nodded. "Anything happen?"

Daisuke thought miserably of the night before, stuck in the back of the taxi, listening to Ken sob and tell him how much he would miss him. He had wanted Ken to insist that he couldn't leave him. That he wouldn't leave him. That he would stay and he and Daisuke would be together. Forever. "He was drunk," Daisuke shrugged, shaking his head softly.

"Well, it's getting closer. Six days becomes five," Koushiro sighed. Daisuke bit back the tired tears that threatened to spill over. Five days. Five days left.

"Sorry," Jyou apologised. "Koushiro's a little blunt when he's grumpy." Koushiro grunted at Jyou but smiled and mouthed sorry at Daisuke. He forced himself to smile back. "We need a plan of action," Jyou mumbled, deep in thought. "When you see him next..."

"Which won't be until tomorrow," Daisuke interrupted. "Maybe the day after that." Jyou bit his lip, worried. "Think about it," Daisuke continued. "We were gonna meet up tomorrow but he'll spend most of today sleeping off last night." Koushiro grunted in agreement. Daisuke ignored him. "He'll feel like crap when he wakes up so, all in all, he won't be doing much packing today. I already put him behind schedule yesterday when I dragged him out. You know how he likes things planned to perfection. He'll call off tomorrow's meeting so he can catch up on missed packing." He finished it all with a defeated wail and Jyou quickly pulled him into a hug.

"We'll just have to make every second count then," Koushiro soothed, rubbing his back gently. "It'll be three days when you next see him, right? We'll put the next two days to good use." Daisuke turned to look at him, his expression blank. "We'll have to build up your confidence."




Daisuke stared down at the list he had spent the last few hours writing. Jyou had insisted he write down all his feelings, weighing up the pros and cons of talking to Ken. He was exhausted but a part of him felt scared to sleep. Usually his dreams were full of happy memories he and Ken had shared, peppered with the occasion fantasies of things they may share in the future. Now these dreams quickly turned to nightmares as Ken was repeatedly ripped from his arms by an unseen force, taken far away where Daisuke would never see him again.

Jyou and Koushiro were right. He had to make every second count. He had let so much time pass. He couldn't afford to waste any more. He felt slightly mad at them for being so happy. He couldn't help it. He easily succumbed to jealousy. But, whenever he saw the way they stole glances at each other, eyes brimming with emotion, he couldn't help but feel happy for them.

He watched as the tears dripped down onto the paper, their intensity and weight increasing. They rolled down his tear stained cheeks, some running along the bridge of his nose, and fell onto the desk, smudging the ink. He didn't really care if they made his writing unreadable. He knew what he had written, simply because he had written the same thing over and over. Five days. Five days left.




Jyou and Koushiro were round his place the next day. They sat in silence, not wanting to break the eerie mood Daisuke seemed to be creating. Daisuke was glad of the quiet. He didn't want them to talk. He never wanted to listen to anyone ever again. He just wanted to be left in his own despair for the rest of eternity. Four days. Four days left.

It was the phone ringing that shattered the atmosphere. Daisuke watched as Koushiro and Jyou stared at each other, both seemingly scared to answer it. In the end Jyou leaned forward and picked up the receiver. "Hello, Motamiya residence." He paused. "Hey, you okay?" He stopped, looking at Daisuke. "No. No, not yet." His voice dropped but, in the silence, everything he said was crystal clear. "No, he's not great... Not talking... Not at all... Of course... I'll tell him. Bye Mimi."

"Mimi?" Koushiro asked and Jyou nodded. He looked at Daisuke, as if seeking permission to speak. Daisuke turned away.

"She wanted to make sure you were okay," Jyou spoke slowly and gently. "And to know if anything happened between you yet." Daisuke turned to him, puzzled. He had confided in Jyou and Koushiro, but nobody else. Mimi shouldn't know a thing. "She said, if you wanted, she and Sora are always on hand to give you seduction techniques. You know, if you wanted a woman's point of view."

Daisuke turned away again, staring out of the window and giving another of those long, mournful sighs. "You told them," he hissed. "I told you that in confidence and you ran to them, shooting your mouth off."

Before Jyou could protest, Koushiro jumped up. "He did not!" he snapped. "You know he wouldn't. Jyou's sensitive and you know it." Daisuke didn't move. "And you know girls. They just... They just seem to know this stuff."

Daisuke turned and flashed his friends a smile. They gratefully returned it. "Well, if seduction is the next step, seduction it is."




"Stay cool," Daisuke instructed himself. "Cool. Cool as a cucumber. A long, smooth, cool cucumber... Head out of the gutter!"

There was a scraping behind the door and Ken's mum stepped out. "Hi Daisuke," she smiled sweetly. "He's just getting changed. Go right in. Just have to pop out and get some emergency supplies." She winked. "Be back in a bit." She quickly scurried away. That was the main thing Daisuke noticed about Ken's mum. She never walked. She scurried.

"Cool," Daisuke continued to whisper, giving himself a quiet prep talk. "Stay cool and everything will be fine. Three days. Three days left. You need to stay cool."

He had allowed Mimi to pick out his clothes. Stupid mistake. He instantly felt uncomfortable. He had laid out what she was allowed to choose from and she had sulked at the limited choice but had eventually settled on a once-smart shirt that now seemed faded but Mimi described as sexy and well-fitting dark jeans. He may have told her what she could choose from but the fact he wasn't in control of his appearence unnerved him.

"Dai, is that you?" Ken called from his room. He peered around his door and, although Daisuke could only see his head, neck and shoulders, he knew he was shirtless. "I won't be a sec. Make yourself comfortable."

"Okay!" Daisuke yelped. Ken disappeared again and Daisuke took a few timid steps away from his friend's room and towards the front door of the apartment. He couldn't do this. Screw being cool, he just couldn't do it. He turned, groping for the door handle, and burst through, running down the corridor as fast as he could.




"Dai?" Why did Ken have to know him so well? Why couldn't he just leave him in his misery? Why did he have to know exactly where he would go? "Dai, what happened? You just took off."

Ken slowly climbed the steps to the top of the stands and sat beside Daisuke. He didn't say any more, giving Daisuke a chance to answer if he felt like it. He never pushed. It was one of the things Daisuke admired in him. He knew when to let something go.

The stands smelled of soccer. It was that delightful smell that Daisuke had always cherished. A mixture of wet grass, mud, perspiration and hotdogs. Some might argue that all sports, if they had to be defined to a certain smell, smelled like that but Daisuke knew the difference. It was the balls themselves. Soccer balls smelt different to all the other sporting balls.

He knew Ken understood his smell theory. He had explained it one night after a particularly tense soccer match on the television. They had been bouncing around the room, well, Daisuke had been bouncing, Ken had simply been smiling, and then Daisuke had told Ken his theory and Ken had nodded in agreement. Enthusiastic agreement. They had spent the next hour discussing the smells of other things they enjoyed and that had been the night Daisuke had realised.

He couldn't remember when he had fallen in love with Ken. He suspected it may have been love at first sight but Ken was masquerading as the Digimon Emperor then and he knew he was supposed to hate him. He knew his feelings had been incredibly intense but he couldn't remember exactly how he felt, try as he might. He must have pushed those feelings right to pit of his subconcious, afraid of what they meant.

However, it had been the 'smell' night that had turned Daisuke's life on his head. He had realised just how bad he had let things get. He looked at Ken, seeing the laughter and warmth in his eyes, and knew. Things had gone too far. He couldn't go on without Ken. He couldn't live without him.

"Smells like soccer," Ken mused, as if reading Daisuke's mind. Daisuke nodded and turned to look at his friend. Three days. "I know," Ken sighed, still displaying his knack at knowing what Daisuke was thinking. "It's come so quickly." He looked out to the playing field before them, then back at Daisuke. "I'm gonna miss you."




"Didn't work, huh?" Mimi sighed when Daisuke stormed into the apartment. She, Sora, Jyou and Koushiro had all gathered there, waiting to hear Daisuke's news. She watched as he flopped down on the couch, burying his face in a cushion. "What happened? What was it like?"

"It was wonderful," Daisuke sighed sadly. "We hung out, just like always, like he wasn't leaving. But we actually talked about it. I've been avoiding it but he wouldn't let me. So we talked." He looked up and smiled gratefully as Sora handed him a glass of water. "He told me how scared he was and I confessed how much I would miss him." The others looked hopeful. "Okay, maybe not how much I would miss him. That probably would have scared him. But I told him that I would miss him."

"So it's gonna be okay?" Mimi asked. "You got a bit more confidence, right? Three days, Daisuke. You can't leave it any longer."

"I think I really got to see into his head," Daisuke sniffled. "Saw just what he was thinking. He was pouring out all these emotions, telling me about everything in his soul, and I got a little bit of insight into our relationship. I saw myself through his eyes." He sighed once more. "He loves me. I'm the best friend he's ever had. Depressingly enough, I may be the best friend he'll ever have."

"Why is that depressing?" Sora asked softly. "That's an amazing gift. And he's lucky to have you."

"No, he's not," Daisuke insisted. "I'm lying to him. I always have been. He was telling me all this, letting it all pour out, and I had to hold back. I couldn't tell him how I really feel. He thinks I'm the best friend in the whole world and I'm not." He choked on a sob, the tears now pouring down his face. "I saw how he sees me," he wailed. "I'm his best friend. But I'll never be anything more than that."




Two days. There was no point any more. When Daisuke's alarm stirred him from sleep, he ripped the plug from the wall and fell asleep again. The nightmares still haunted him but he no longer fought. He just watched as Ken was snatched away.

Ken called at noon but Daisuke slept through the call. When he finally dragged himself out of bed and, still feeling exhausted, clicked on the answer machine, he was surpirsed when Ken's voice filled the room.

"Hey, still asleep, huh? Do you ever get up, Dai?" the voice had teased. "I just had, er, some bad news. And I don't want you to be mad because I don't want this any more than you do. But it will make things easier. It won't stretch things out and it will help if I'm there quicker." Daisuke frowned. "In case you haven't already figured out what I'm saying, and, knowing you, I'm guessing you haven't, I have to leave early. I'm going tomorrow. Call me as soon as you get this, okay?"

Daisuke had called Jyou in floods of tears but, by the time he had arrived, Daisuke had calmed himself. Two days had become one. One day. One day left. An extra day had been stolen from him but it didn't matter. Ken was leaving and, if it was right at that moment or hundred years in the future, Daisuke was going to have to say goodbye to him.

"It's too late," he whimpered as Jyou opened the door and enveloped him in a hug. "He's going tomorrow and I can't do a thing about it."

He allowed Jyou to guide him into the den, sitting on an armchair. Koushiro wandered over from the kitchen. "I just spoke to Mimi on the phone," he explained. "Ken told her he was leaving early. She wants to know if you're okay."

Daisuke looked at the worried faces watching him, genuine concern filling their eyes. He found himself smiling. "I will be," he insisted.




Jyou, Koushiro, Mimi and Sora had all, once again, gathered at Daisuke's apartment. Since he was usually the only one home, they were there to keep him company as well as using it as their home away from home. Jyou had returned to the city for the summer to spend time with Koushiro and Mimi was partaking in an exchange year, Japan being her natural choice when offered the chance to spend a year abroad from America.

This time Takeru was also there, back from visiting his brother, and Iori and Miyako were both back after summer vacations. "I don't get what's wrong with Daisuke," he heard Miyako whisper to Mimi. "Why is he so bummed? It's not like he'll never see Ken again." Mimi looked at Daisuke, certain he had heard, and he smiled and shrugged. Mimi took this as her invitation to explain and whispered something to her. "Oh my God," he heard Miyako coo. "And he's leaving. And Daisuke didn't say anything." She bounded over to Daisuke and encased him in one of her bear hugs, which he gratefully received.

"He's here," Jyou called softly from his watch point by the window. Mimi and Sora rushed over to watch as Ken, driving a small DIY-Removals van, pulled over outside and climbed out. He paused, as if trying to psyche himself up, then, with a deep breath, walked into the building. Daisuke watched from behind the others. It was time to say goodbye.

"You're not going to say anything?" Miyako asked, concern etched across her face. Daisuke shook his head. It was all he could do. That horrible, gnawing feeling that had filled his stomach for the past week had now taken over his mouth and he didn't think he would be able to form a coherent sentence.

Mimi was the one who answered the knock at the door. Ken smiled gratefully and sauntered in. He had a sand coloured duffle bag slung over his shoulder and he played with the straps nervously. "Well," he sighed. "I guess this is it."

Everyone leapt forward in a single motion, swarming around him and almost crushing him in a group hug. Everyone except Daisuke. He watched as Ken yelped happily, tears seeming to form rapidly in his eyes. "I kind of wanted to get there in one piece," he laughed.

The others quickly dispersed, with Miyako and Sora trying to comfort a weeping Mimi and Jyou and Koushiro holding on to each other as if one of them was going to be forced to leave. "I've got something for you," Daisuke said, forcing a grin, when everything had died down. He led Ken to his bedroom. "You okay?"

Ken nodded and plopped down on the bed, dropping the bag on the floor. "I'm fine," he insisted. "Just a little overwhelmed." Daisuke nodded, that fake grin still plastered on his face. "And it's still pretty hot out there. Can I steal another soda? For old times sake?"

Daisuke forced a laugh which, to him, sounded more like a strangling noise and left the room. "Are you...?" Sora began to ask but Daisuke held up his hand, gesturing for her to stop. He seemed to float to the kitchen as he wasn't concious of his legs actually moving. Pulling a soda from the fridge, he turned and saw Takeru give him a weak smile.

Once back in his room, he tossed the can to Ken and dug through the bottom of his closet, looking for his gift. "You didn't have to get me anything, Dai," Ken smiled, his nervousness at Daisuke's silence obvious. "We won't be apart long. I'm sure of it."

Daisuke nodded dumbly and handed him the soccer ball he had asked to be specially made at the local sports emporium. Daisuke had signed it with thick black marker but the main feature was the symbol in the middle. Kindness. The symbol of kindness. Ken jumped up and threw his arms around him but Daisuke didn't have the energy left to curse himself for the thoughts that raced through his mind.

Ken went to show everyone his gift and Daisuke watched silently as they cooed over it and him. Each goodbye hug seemed to be more tearful that the last. "Yama sends his love," Takeru grinned through his tears. Yamato. Yamato and Taichi. Daisuke may not have liked it but he knew keeping quiet was best. For Ken, at least.

When it was time to leave, basically, when Mimi looked like she might start hyperventilating, Ken returned to Daisuke's room to pick up his bag and they walked silently down the stairs. Six years had turned to six days so quickly. And now it was more like six minutes.

"Well, I guess this is it," Ken shrugged, biting his lip to stop himself from crying. Mimi let out another wail. "But don't worry. I'll be back. You can't get rid of me that easily."

There was another group hug outside the van but, once again, Daisuke refused to let himself partake. It was too difficult. He couldn't say goodbye. He didn't want to. Knowing he had to didn't make it any easier.

"Bye, everyone," Ken grinned, tossing his bag onto the passenger seat. "I better go before I start blubbing like Mimi." Mimi let out another wail. He climbed in, slamming the door behind him and turning the key in the ignition.

That was it. Daisuke couldn't take any more. The tears began to roll heavily down his cheeks and he turned to run back inside. Jyou gripped his arm, stopping him from moving. "Not yet," he instructed. "Let him get down the street. I know you don't want him worrying." Daisuke nodded, tears still pouring.

The engine cut to a halt and Ken opened the door again. He climbed out, bringing the bag with him, and walked slowly over to Daisuke, who was desperately trying to brush away the tears. Ken thrust the bag into his hand. "C'mon then," he urged. "Are you coming or not?" Daisuke stared blankly. "I packed some of your things in there." He pointed at the bag. "You didn't think I was really going to leave you, did you?"

Daisuke looked down at the bag in his arms, then up at Ken. The smile on his face was so gentle and sincere. He reached forward, cupping Daisuke's chin in his hands and kissed him gently on the nose. "I can't leave without you, Dai. Scratch that. I can't live without you." Before Daisuke could say any more, Ken leaned forward again, this time capturing his mouth with his lips. Daisuke couldn't respond, he just allowed himself to be kissed.

When Ken drew back he must of been puzzled by Daisuke's surprised expression because his own quickly clouded with worry. "Are you going to come or not, Dai?" he probed gently. Daisuke opened his mouth to speak but all that escaped was a noise similar to a giraffe dying. Miyako, despite herself, snorted with laughter and Sora quickly nudged her hard in the ribs. "Are you coming?"

Daisuke wrapped his arms around Ken and pulled him closer, drawing him into another kiss. He felt Ken melt into his embrace, taking in the taste of the boy he had been wanting to kiss for six years. He tilted his head to the right, allowing their faces to be even closer and, for that brief moment, it felt as if they were one person. It was Ken who pulled away first. "Should I take that as a yes?"

"When did you...? I mean... When did you...? When?!" Daisuke stammered. Ken smiled gently, reaching up a hand to wipe away Daisuke's stray tears.

"I'm not sure," Ken admitted. "But I know when it got really bad. That night we had that really long discussion about balls."

To his right, Daisuke noticed Koushiro's mouth drop open at that last statement. He turned, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Head out of the gutter," he ordered, allowing Ken to guide him to the van and their new life.