Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ In The Rain ❯ In The Rain ( Chapter 1 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Standard Disclaimer- Standard trying to be funny phrase that basically says, “I don’t own (genre name)”, in this case, Digimon. I also don’t own “She Will Be Loved”, by Maroon 5.
AN: Tried to turn this fluffy at first, but the angst, unrequited version is much better and in keeping with characterizations. I can’t write fluff anyway.
(Beauty queen of only eighteenShe had some trouble with herself)
It's raining... who could it be in a storm like this?
Stunning... utterly stunning. A goddess.
Haven’t I seen this somewhere before?
Those were the thoughts that crossed Taichi Kamiya’s mind as he saw that his best friend appeared at his doorstep again, clothes soaking from the rain and eyes red with tears.
The words best friend never sounded so utterly wrong and revolting to his mind before.
“Trouble with Matt.” Tai said. It was not a question.
(He was always there to help herShe always belonged to someone else)
Sora Takenouchi nodded, tears streaming freely from her auburn eyes. After a moment, Tai held his arms out to her, an embrace which the bearer of Love accepted gladly and hurled herself into his arms.
It was moment’s like these that both saved and damned Taichi.Every time this occured, it was twisting the knife in his gut and filling him with utter rapture.Every second he held on to this woman was like being in Heaven and thrown into Hell.
No... the embrace was paradise.
Letting go, letting her go back to Matt. That was Hell.
The knowledge that while Tai held her for a moment, his best friend, his comrade, his rival, his brother in all but blood, had her forever.
“What’s wrong?” Tai asked quietly, after a moment.
(I drove for miles and milesAnd wound up at your doorI've had you so many times but somehowI want more)
“He... he’s going on tour in America. He’ll be gone for over six months Tai! He’ll miss my birthday, our anniversary, everything!” Sora cried out bitterly, pounding her fists into his chest because she knew that he would take all her pain and make it better. When her boyfriend damaged her, Tai picked up the pieces and made it better.
Tai sighed. One half of him desperately screamed, “Tell her he’s not good enough for her! Tell her that you love her! That you’d never leave her!”
The other half of him roared back, “Matt’s practically your brother! You can’t betray him!”
And that half always one over the former.
That half always wanted these moments, Sora’ friendship, and hoped that it would be enough to soothe the ache, the wound that never healed.
What kind of person am I... thinking about taking advantage of my best friend’s girl at times like these.
So Tai just held on to her, and prayed that this moment would last just a little longer.
(I don't mind spending everydayOut on your corner in the pouring rain)
“Thanks Tai... you’re always there for me.” Sora whispered quietly, a voice broken and battered and at that moment Tai hated Matt. Hated him for everything he did to this wonderful girl who he didn't deserve.
But the moment passed, and Matt was his best friend again.
“I’ll always be there for you. Rain or shine.” Tai replied softly. The promise had always been unspoken before... but somehow, Tai needed it to be said.
(Look for the girl with the broken smileAsk her if she wants to stay awhile)
How many times, Tai wondered. How many times has Matt hurt her, and I came and helped sweep up the mess of her broken heart.
How many times have I let go of her and sent her back to Matt?
After Sora would leave his apartment, sometimes after a day, sometimes an hour, sometimes a week, Tai would make a promise to himself, that next time, he wouldn’t let her back in.
He broke that promise every time he saw that broken hearted smile and those tears in her eyes.
He just couldn’t help himself.
He loved her too damn much.
(And she will be lovedShe will be loved)
So Tai just accepted his fate to be the sexless shoulder to lean on, the brother figure to the only woman, it seemed, that he would ever love. Like a moth to a flame, she drew him in, a mirage in the desert of life. Always just on the edge of his vision, just out of his reach.
All he could do was try, try desperately to be content with friendship and the knowledge that he would always be there for her.
Sora pulled back and smiled at him, a smile that was so utterly beautiful it destroyed Tai more completely than if she had shot him in the heart.
Please don’t smile at me like that, don’t make me believe I’m the only one you love. Please... please...
But that smile was what kept him going. These moments, these intoxicating moments were all that held him together on lonely nights.
(Tap on my window knock on my door I want to make you feel beautiful)
“Look at me,” Sora murmured softly, “I look so horrible. Why would Matt want me? There are so many other girls-“ The tears began to fall like the rain outside. Each silvery drop slew Tai slowly, bit by bit with every drop that fell.
”No girl is like you though. No one is.” Tai replied, meaning every syllable. Brushing a single errant lock of orange hair out of her auburn eyes, he whispered softly, “You’re far more beautiful than them."
For a moment, Taichi feared he had gone beyond his bounds. But the grateful smile and flush of Sora's cheeks told that she considered it a compliment from a close friend, or perhaps a brother.
The ache grew with that beautiful, broken smile.
(I know I tend to get so insecureIt doesn't matter anymore)
Standing in front of the woman he loved and could never have, Tai knew that this was why he kept going, why he kept on letting her back into his life when he knew she would leave.
Because it wasn’t about him. This was about Sora, and what she needed.
If she needed him, then even if it killed him inside, tore him up and digested his heart, then so be it.
And as long as Tai could give her what she needed, then his own needs, his own wants, his own heart be damned.
(It's not always rainbows and butterfliesIt's compromise that moves us along)
If he could provide her with anything, even the smallest service, then that was how he would live his life.
Tai was no longer a child. He no longer held fantasies of wedded bliss with Sora, children who would cling to his heels and who he could teach soccer. That dream had died a long time ago.
He would take what he could get, and each time hold onto the false hope that it was enough.
(My heart is full and my door's always openYou can come anytime you want)
“You’re always helping me Tai.” Sora murmured softly.
“I always will.” After a moment, he added, “My door’s always open. You know that.”
Sora smiled at him, and once more Tai was begging her not to and not to stop. “You’re a great friend.”
Friend.
The word had all the killing force of a nuclear missile.
Tai forced a smile, practiced endlessly in moments like these. “I know.”
A small giggle escaped her lips, a laugh that both warmed and shattered his heart to hear.
(I don't mind spending everydayOut on your corner in the pouring rain)
This moment, these moments... these were what Tai lived for. For those brief moments, Tai could be happy.
Maybe that was enough. Maybe it was enough to always have Sora’s back, always be there to help her.
Or maybe he was just lying to himself again.
(Look for the girl with the broken smileAsk her if she wants to stay awhileAnd she will be lovedShe will be loved)
“Do you want to stay?” Tai asked softly, “At least until the storm passes.” He added, but knew that it would pass in moments. He tried to keep the desperation out of his voice, and prayed that he did.
Moments like these always pass.
Sora looked at him gratefully, but didn’t move. After a moment, she shook her head.She stared at Tai’s chocolate brown eyes, pinning them with her auburn ones.
God... don't do this to me... please... Taichi begged bitterly. Don't make this harder.
(I know where you hideAlone in your carKnow all of the things that make you who you are)
“How do you always know what to do for me?” She asked softly.
Because I love you. His mind said.
“Because I know you.” His mouth said, quirking into a small, caring smile that was barely holding back the love that threatened to swallow him whole. “I know that you just need a shoulder to cry on and some time.”
“Thanks.” Sora replied quietly.
Outside, the storm was dying, spent of all its fury. The sun came back, and Tai knew that his time with Sora was over. When it was bright, she was with Matt. When it rained, she was with him.
It was no wonder that Tai both loved and loathed the rain.
(I know that goodbye means nothing at allComes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls)
“I should go.” The words were a half-whisper, and Sora seemed to be gauging him for a moment.
“Yeah.” Tai forced himself to say, and cracked a half-hearted smile.
“Goodbye Tai.” She whispered, and then left, disappearing like a mirage. The shadows swallowed his apartment.
“Goodbye Sora.” Tai replied quietly, but the words were empty and meaningless. All his goodbyes to her were.
He just couldn’t escape her. He couldn’t escape his own heart.
He couldn’t break his promise. He could break any other promise he made to anyone else for her. He could lie to himself, could run, could hide.
But he couldn't stop being there for her.
And the apartment’s silence was utterly crushing, and Hell descended back into his life.
Taichi Kamiya let the rain of tears fall from his eyes freely.
AN: Thanks for reading, and remember, reviews are always appreciated!
Converting /tmp/phpYVfLf0 to /dev/stdout
AN: Tried to turn this fluffy at first, but the angst, unrequited version is much better and in keeping with characterizations. I can’t write fluff anyway.
(Beauty queen of only eighteenShe had some trouble with herself)
It's raining... who could it be in a storm like this?
Stunning... utterly stunning. A goddess.
Haven’t I seen this somewhere before?
Those were the thoughts that crossed Taichi Kamiya’s mind as he saw that his best friend appeared at his doorstep again, clothes soaking from the rain and eyes red with tears.
The words best friend never sounded so utterly wrong and revolting to his mind before.
“Trouble with Matt.” Tai said. It was not a question.
(He was always there to help herShe always belonged to someone else)
Sora Takenouchi nodded, tears streaming freely from her auburn eyes. After a moment, Tai held his arms out to her, an embrace which the bearer of Love accepted gladly and hurled herself into his arms.
It was moment’s like these that both saved and damned Taichi.Every time this occured, it was twisting the knife in his gut and filling him with utter rapture.Every second he held on to this woman was like being in Heaven and thrown into Hell.
No... the embrace was paradise.
Letting go, letting her go back to Matt. That was Hell.
The knowledge that while Tai held her for a moment, his best friend, his comrade, his rival, his brother in all but blood, had her forever.
“What’s wrong?” Tai asked quietly, after a moment.
(I drove for miles and milesAnd wound up at your doorI've had you so many times but somehowI want more)
“He... he’s going on tour in America. He’ll be gone for over six months Tai! He’ll miss my birthday, our anniversary, everything!” Sora cried out bitterly, pounding her fists into his chest because she knew that he would take all her pain and make it better. When her boyfriend damaged her, Tai picked up the pieces and made it better.
Tai sighed. One half of him desperately screamed, “Tell her he’s not good enough for her! Tell her that you love her! That you’d never leave her!”
The other half of him roared back, “Matt’s practically your brother! You can’t betray him!”
And that half always one over the former.
That half always wanted these moments, Sora’ friendship, and hoped that it would be enough to soothe the ache, the wound that never healed.
What kind of person am I... thinking about taking advantage of my best friend’s girl at times like these.
So Tai just held on to her, and prayed that this moment would last just a little longer.
(I don't mind spending everydayOut on your corner in the pouring rain)
“Thanks Tai... you’re always there for me.” Sora whispered quietly, a voice broken and battered and at that moment Tai hated Matt. Hated him for everything he did to this wonderful girl who he didn't deserve.
But the moment passed, and Matt was his best friend again.
“I’ll always be there for you. Rain or shine.” Tai replied softly. The promise had always been unspoken before... but somehow, Tai needed it to be said.
(Look for the girl with the broken smileAsk her if she wants to stay awhile)
How many times, Tai wondered. How many times has Matt hurt her, and I came and helped sweep up the mess of her broken heart.
How many times have I let go of her and sent her back to Matt?
After Sora would leave his apartment, sometimes after a day, sometimes an hour, sometimes a week, Tai would make a promise to himself, that next time, he wouldn’t let her back in.
He broke that promise every time he saw that broken hearted smile and those tears in her eyes.
He just couldn’t help himself.
He loved her too damn much.
(And she will be lovedShe will be loved)
So Tai just accepted his fate to be the sexless shoulder to lean on, the brother figure to the only woman, it seemed, that he would ever love. Like a moth to a flame, she drew him in, a mirage in the desert of life. Always just on the edge of his vision, just out of his reach.
All he could do was try, try desperately to be content with friendship and the knowledge that he would always be there for her.
Sora pulled back and smiled at him, a smile that was so utterly beautiful it destroyed Tai more completely than if she had shot him in the heart.
Please don’t smile at me like that, don’t make me believe I’m the only one you love. Please... please...
But that smile was what kept him going. These moments, these intoxicating moments were all that held him together on lonely nights.
(Tap on my window knock on my door I want to make you feel beautiful)
“Look at me,” Sora murmured softly, “I look so horrible. Why would Matt want me? There are so many other girls-“ The tears began to fall like the rain outside. Each silvery drop slew Tai slowly, bit by bit with every drop that fell.
”No girl is like you though. No one is.” Tai replied, meaning every syllable. Brushing a single errant lock of orange hair out of her auburn eyes, he whispered softly, “You’re far more beautiful than them."
For a moment, Taichi feared he had gone beyond his bounds. But the grateful smile and flush of Sora's cheeks told that she considered it a compliment from a close friend, or perhaps a brother.
The ache grew with that beautiful, broken smile.
(I know I tend to get so insecureIt doesn't matter anymore)
Standing in front of the woman he loved and could never have, Tai knew that this was why he kept going, why he kept on letting her back into his life when he knew she would leave.
Because it wasn’t about him. This was about Sora, and what she needed.
If she needed him, then even if it killed him inside, tore him up and digested his heart, then so be it.
And as long as Tai could give her what she needed, then his own needs, his own wants, his own heart be damned.
(It's not always rainbows and butterfliesIt's compromise that moves us along)
If he could provide her with anything, even the smallest service, then that was how he would live his life.
Tai was no longer a child. He no longer held fantasies of wedded bliss with Sora, children who would cling to his heels and who he could teach soccer. That dream had died a long time ago.
He would take what he could get, and each time hold onto the false hope that it was enough.
(My heart is full and my door's always openYou can come anytime you want)
“You’re always helping me Tai.” Sora murmured softly.
“I always will.” After a moment, he added, “My door’s always open. You know that.”
Sora smiled at him, and once more Tai was begging her not to and not to stop. “You’re a great friend.”
Friend.
The word had all the killing force of a nuclear missile.
Tai forced a smile, practiced endlessly in moments like these. “I know.”
A small giggle escaped her lips, a laugh that both warmed and shattered his heart to hear.
(I don't mind spending everydayOut on your corner in the pouring rain)
This moment, these moments... these were what Tai lived for. For those brief moments, Tai could be happy.
Maybe that was enough. Maybe it was enough to always have Sora’s back, always be there to help her.
Or maybe he was just lying to himself again.
(Look for the girl with the broken smileAsk her if she wants to stay awhileAnd she will be lovedShe will be loved)
“Do you want to stay?” Tai asked softly, “At least until the storm passes.” He added, but knew that it would pass in moments. He tried to keep the desperation out of his voice, and prayed that he did.
Moments like these always pass.
Sora looked at him gratefully, but didn’t move. After a moment, she shook her head.She stared at Tai’s chocolate brown eyes, pinning them with her auburn ones.
God... don't do this to me... please... Taichi begged bitterly. Don't make this harder.
(I know where you hideAlone in your carKnow all of the things that make you who you are)
“How do you always know what to do for me?” She asked softly.
Because I love you. His mind said.
“Because I know you.” His mouth said, quirking into a small, caring smile that was barely holding back the love that threatened to swallow him whole. “I know that you just need a shoulder to cry on and some time.”
“Thanks.” Sora replied quietly.
Outside, the storm was dying, spent of all its fury. The sun came back, and Tai knew that his time with Sora was over. When it was bright, she was with Matt. When it rained, she was with him.
It was no wonder that Tai both loved and loathed the rain.
(I know that goodbye means nothing at allComes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls)
“I should go.” The words were a half-whisper, and Sora seemed to be gauging him for a moment.
“Yeah.” Tai forced himself to say, and cracked a half-hearted smile.
“Goodbye Tai.” She whispered, and then left, disappearing like a mirage. The shadows swallowed his apartment.
“Goodbye Sora.” Tai replied quietly, but the words were empty and meaningless. All his goodbyes to her were.
He just couldn’t escape her. He couldn’t escape his own heart.
He couldn’t break his promise. He could break any other promise he made to anyone else for her. He could lie to himself, could run, could hide.
But he couldn't stop being there for her.
And the apartment’s silence was utterly crushing, and Hell descended back into his life.
Taichi Kamiya let the rain of tears fall from his eyes freely.
AN: Thanks for reading, and remember, reviews are always appreciated!
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