Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Things I Learned From Watching Digimon(MST) ❯ One-Shot
List of things I learned from watching Digimon by Worldwalker Pure (MSTed by Alan Wilkinson)
1. Never, EVER call Patamon a pig.
He's a Goldfish.
2. If a marrionette doll with a hammer wants to play hide-and-seek with you, buy a bulletproof vest.
Or a Flamethrower.
3. Clowns are the essence of evil.
But mimes are worse.
4. Joe is the master of Conversational Martial Arts Secret Technique, 'Open Mouth, Insert Shoe Store'.
But it could be worse.
5. It would not surprise me to see Joe remove a AK-47 from that bag of his.
It'd surprise Joe. It's Kari's.
6. If a Digimon looks weak, it'll wind up Digivolving into something big that'll kick your butt.
If a blonde Australian looks weak, watch out for her imaginary psycho boyfriend.
7. Even if they call it sludge, that doesn't change what it really is.
Hair moose...
8. Never touch Tentomon's tree.
You're really not his type.
9. If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and acts like a duck, it's really an Ultimate level Digimon that wants to kill you.
Unless it's carrying a leek. Then it's a Pokémon called Farfetched and very tasty. Especially with leek.
10. You can never be TOO paranoid.
We really are out to get you.
11. Never ask Etemon to sing for you.
Unless you like being a Rookie.
12. It's perfectly normal for a huge cactus to turn into a perfectly proportioned female with green hair...
...black knickers and very strange eyes.
13. Don't piss off Gatomon.
Unless you're Velocimon (or Renamon)
14. Cats turn into half-naked angel babes all the time!
But she still won't go out with you.
15. And finally, it's not so bad losing your best friend...as long as you get them back again.
And are prepared to change them.