Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ A CHRISTMAS SECRET? ❯ Chrismas Secret ( Chapter 1 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
Piccolo:MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
Gohan:You mean, we can fuck on christmas?
Goten:Whatamahoo? whos fucking where?
Gohan:Me and piccolo...your bed...5 minutes
Goten:Oh hell naw...i already got Videl scheduled in 3...
Gohan:Oh...her...no biggie..me and piccolo will just have to reschedule
Chi-Chi:*slaps GohaN* YOU ARE NOT MAKING ME RESCHEDULE THE PARTY AGAIN!
Gohan:What the fuck? bitch...what are you talking about?
Goku:Hehehe...my gay son, she meant to slap me, but too much eggnog made her think I was you...HAHAHAHAHAHHA
Chi-Chi:*hic*you shut the *hic* hell up!*hic*
Goku:Where the fuck is everybody else?
Trunks:POONTANG!!!
Goku:Bingo Trunks....hey Johnny tell 'em what hes won!
Monster Truck DBZ Announcer:ON Sunday,SUNDAY,SUNDAY!...Trunks gets Bulma,BULMA,BULMA! alone in a honeymoon suite,SUITE,SUITE!, with a full box of condoms,CONDOMS,CONDOMS! and KY JELLY,JELLY,JELLY!
Trunks:BOO YAH!
Goku:Hes just joking...now get your gayass out of my house...and i hope FUNi fires you!
Trunks:I aint gay...
Goku:Of course not...i was talking to the announcer
Trunks:OH!!!...but seriously do i get Bulma?
Goku:Hell no.
Trunks:Bummer dude...
Krillin:*walks in* BRING ME THE VIRGINS!
#18:*smacks krillin*Your with me now, remember?
Krillin:DAMMIT!
Yamcha:*walks in* BRING ME THE VIRGINS!
Puar:*smacks yamcha*your with me now, remember?
Yamcha:DAMMIT!
*all puke but Goku*
Goku:Uh...i dont get it...
Gohan:Dammit man...hes fucking a cat...
Goku:Uh...
Gohan:Hes porkin' the pussy!
Goku:*vomits over Gohan* SICK!
Chi-Chi:DAMMIT GOKU*slaps him* DONT PUKE ON OUR SON!
Vegeta:Hi guys....OH SICK*vomits on the floor*
Goten:What is up with that, foo?
Mr. Popo:*walks in*Whats up my ghetto bruthas on the west side...i bees representing with the bling-bling*makes gang sign*
Goten:Hey man, did you see that?
Trunks:Hell yah i did...*pulls out gun*
Goten:You better run you fucking ara-negro! *procedes to bust a cap in popo's ass*
Popo:Aww shizit...is this the end for the bi-racial gardener?
Trunks:Naw not yet...*kicks Popo in the knuts*now your a bi-racial impotent gardener.
Vegeta:Join the club man!
Goku:The fock? your a bi-racial gardener?
Vegeta:Moron..*slaps Goku a la Majin Buu Saga* I MEANT IMPOTENCY!
Bulma:He does gardening too...even has the apron...
Vegeta:DAMMIT WOMEN...YOU SAID IT WAS A SECRET!
King Vegeta:Hes also bi-racial...his mom was a black saiyan whore!
Vegeta:DAMN YOU ALL!!!!
King Vegeta and Bulma:Its all true!
All but Veggie:*laughing asses off rolling on the floor*
Vegeta:Must find out past...must prove asshole of a father wrong!
King Vegeta:Good luck, farmer John!
Vegeta:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*blows up house*
Goku:Goddammit...you blew up my fuckin' house!
Vegeta:GBLARGH AMAMFRAAZIT GRRBLOW!
Goten:And i thought we were fucked up...
Trunks:GRBAZA MMMMFOWA KRAPLOW!
Goten:Ok, we are fucked up!
Vegeta:Must kill father!
Ghost of Bardock:ASSHOLE...DO YOU HAVE TO KILL EVERYONES DAD?!
Vegeta:WTF?...Frieza did that!
Bardock:Hey Gohan...wheres Freiza?
Gohan:Uh...Backroom at Le Bootay
Bardock:Thank you...*flies off*
Vegeta:What was the point of that?
*gets poked by a pencil*
HamtaroManme:Shut the fuck up,asshole and maybe i'll give you a cock!
Vegeta:Yes sir...i'll be quiet..
Goku:VEGETA!!! VEGETA!!! VEGETA..TALK YOU ASSHOLE!
Trunks:Shut the fuck up Goku...i want Vegeta to have a cock so maybe i can get a lil bro to steal weed for me!
Goku:Sorry dude..
Trunks:Stupid focker...
Vegeta:What was i gonna do?
Goten:You were gonna fuck your father...
Vegeta:REALLY?!!!
Goten:No,not really, i was kidding
Vegeta:Fuckin' kids...
King Vegeta:I'm gonna go back to Plant Vegeta and get you a brother.
Vegeta:Hey pops...i just had a thought...your FUCKIN' DEAD! Frieza raped you good and your dead...
King Vegeta:Dammit my disguise is broken...*takes off suit* I AM FRIEZA..THE RAPER OF KING VEGETA!!!
Goten:And Gohan too...
*gohan punches Goten*
Gohan:You said you'd keep it secret!!!
Goku:Oh shut up son...everyone knew it already...it was in the National Enquirer!
Frieza:Now Gohan...come peacefully to my lair and it wont hurt...too much!
Vegeta:God damn...this is lame...how many fucking times is Hamtaroman gonna have Frieza fail to rape Gohan?
HamtaroMan:Thats it...no cock for you Veggie!
Trunks:NO!!!!!!!!!! I WANTED A BROTHER FOR CHRISTMAS!!!
Vegeta:Ah shit...maybe next year...
Trunks:GAZZABWAGH ARMFALLEZA MITOO!!!!
Goten:Oh shit...there he goes again..
Trunks:Need some sexing...must goto Le Bootay!
Frieza:I bought the place...only gay men now!
Trunks:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gohan:YESSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bulma:So i'm unemployed?
Trunks:Not when i'm around! *showers Bulma in money*
Piccolo:Eww incest!
Gohan:What?...what about all those times you screwed your sis...
Piccolo:*grabs Gohan* SHUT UP!!!!*throws him in the ocean*
Chi-Chi:DONT THROW GOHAN INTO THE OCEAN!!!*slaps him*
Piccolo:But i'm straight now!
Krillin:WAAAH????
Chi-Chi:Thats no excuse for killing Gohan...
Piccolo:Sounded good enough to me...
Frieza:Here is my chance! *sneaks out to get Gohan*
Vegeta:*grabs Frieza*Not so fast gay boy...i can use you...
Frieza:In many kinky ways and positions?
Vegeta:EWW NO...FUCKIN SICK!...your gonna rape my ghost father and make him tell the truth about my mother!
Frieza:I've never raped a dead guy before...
Vegeta:Just think of it as Gohan...just not as juicy!
Goku:Aww sick...and i thought only Piccolo got it on with Gohan.
Gohan:*in the water*Theres too many guys to mention...
Goku:Ya'll hear something?
Goten:Its just Yamcha and Puar!
Yamcha:*in back room* IM READING A BOOK!
Trunks:Yah right..."How to fuck cats"
Goku:*faceplant* Oh thats great...
Goten:What the fuck pops? that was lame
Vegeta:SILENCE...back to the matter at hand
Trunks:Yah...Yamcha's hand on Puar!
Goku:*on the floor laughing* Oh lord...this kid is slayin' me...
Goten:I really need to have a not retarded father...
Vegeta:SILENCE INFIDEL!!! we need to address the situation here!
Trunks:We need to have Yamcha stop undressing Pua..*gets slapped by Vegeta*
Vegeta:DAMMIT SON..SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!
Trunks:Ok sorry...i'll be quiet now..
Goku:*pouts* Oh darn..
Goten:Darn?...god my dad is a pussy... and retarded!
Trunks:Yamcha is screwing a pu...*gets knocked out by vegeta*
Vegeta:GOD DAMN KID...WONT SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Goten:Man...you hit him pretty hard...
Vegeta:Was it something like this?! *knocks out Goten*
Goten:Hell naw...Bulma hits me harder during sex...*pases out*
Vegeta:Hate kids...why did i even have one?
Bulma:You never did...
Vegeta:Oh yah....FRIEZA...your...talents...are needed now!
Frieza:OK!
Vegeta:I want you to use any methods neccasary to exploit the truth of my mother from my father!
Freiza:It will be done...
*10 minutes later*
Vegeta:God that is a lot of screaming...
Goku:My fracking ears hurt...isn't that right Lefty?
Vegeta:Dont start that shit again...*knocks Goku out cold*
Goku:Damn..didn't now i was fighting Chi-Chi..*passes out*
Vegeta:Ah all alone...better make myself at home...*takes off pants*
Krillin:God dammit...OK...3 things...we are OUTSIDE! and i'm still here!
Vegeta:Ok...2 things...your not a person...and what was your third thing?
Krillin:Ok..2 things...I AM A PERSON DAMMIT...and 2nd...PUT SOME DAMN UNDERWEAR ON
Vegeta:Oh shit...*puts pants back on* sorry...
Krillin:Its ok...
Vegeta:But anyways, really...your not a person...you have to have a nose to be a person...your just...a...thing!
Krillin:I'M A PERSON, DAMMIT!
Vegeta:Ah fuck it..*knocks krillin out*
Krillin:ooh #18...you hit hard...for a girl *passes out*
Frieza:*panting*Ok...your father said it was cruel joke...your mom is still a whore...but she wasn't black...
Vegeta:Good...your time here is done! *beats the shit outta Frieza*
Frieza:You fight like Gohan...*passes out*
Vegeta:So many people i beat the shit out of...i'm a stud!
Frieza:I was kidding...your mom was a negro! *passes out*
Vegeta:BASTARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*the end*
Gohan:You mean, we can fuck on christmas?
Goten:Whatamahoo? whos fucking where?
Gohan:Me and piccolo...your bed...5 minutes
Goten:Oh hell naw...i already got Videl scheduled in 3...
Gohan:Oh...her...no biggie..me and piccolo will just have to reschedule
Chi-Chi:*slaps GohaN* YOU ARE NOT MAKING ME RESCHEDULE THE PARTY AGAIN!
Gohan:What the fuck? bitch...what are you talking about?
Goku:Hehehe...my gay son, she meant to slap me, but too much eggnog made her think I was you...HAHAHAHAHAHHA
Chi-Chi:*hic*you shut the *hic* hell up!*hic*
Goku:Where the fuck is everybody else?
Trunks:POONTANG!!!
Goku:Bingo Trunks....hey Johnny tell 'em what hes won!
Monster Truck DBZ Announcer:ON Sunday,SUNDAY,SUNDAY!...Trunks gets Bulma,BULMA,BULMA! alone in a honeymoon suite,SUITE,SUITE!, with a full box of condoms,CONDOMS,CONDOMS! and KY JELLY,JELLY,JELLY!
Trunks:BOO YAH!
Goku:Hes just joking...now get your gayass out of my house...and i hope FUNi fires you!
Trunks:I aint gay...
Goku:Of course not...i was talking to the announcer
Trunks:OH!!!...but seriously do i get Bulma?
Goku:Hell no.
Trunks:Bummer dude...
Krillin:*walks in* BRING ME THE VIRGINS!
#18:*smacks krillin*Your with me now, remember?
Krillin:DAMMIT!
Yamcha:*walks in* BRING ME THE VIRGINS!
Puar:*smacks yamcha*your with me now, remember?
Yamcha:DAMMIT!
*all puke but Goku*
Goku:Uh...i dont get it...
Gohan:Dammit man...hes fucking a cat...
Goku:Uh...
Gohan:Hes porkin' the pussy!
Goku:*vomits over Gohan* SICK!
Chi-Chi:DAMMIT GOKU*slaps him* DONT PUKE ON OUR SON!
Vegeta:Hi guys....OH SICK*vomits on the floor*
Goten:What is up with that, foo?
Mr. Popo:*walks in*Whats up my ghetto bruthas on the west side...i bees representing with the bling-bling*makes gang sign*
Goten:Hey man, did you see that?
Trunks:Hell yah i did...*pulls out gun*
Goten:You better run you fucking ara-negro! *procedes to bust a cap in popo's ass*
Popo:Aww shizit...is this the end for the bi-racial gardener?
Trunks:Naw not yet...*kicks Popo in the knuts*now your a bi-racial impotent gardener.
Vegeta:Join the club man!
Goku:The fock? your a bi-racial gardener?
Vegeta:Moron..*slaps Goku a la Majin Buu Saga* I MEANT IMPOTENCY!
Bulma:He does gardening too...even has the apron...
Vegeta:DAMMIT WOMEN...YOU SAID IT WAS A SECRET!
King Vegeta:Hes also bi-racial...his mom was a black saiyan whore!
Vegeta:DAMN YOU ALL!!!!
King Vegeta and Bulma:Its all true!
All but Veggie:*laughing asses off rolling on the floor*
Vegeta:Must find out past...must prove asshole of a father wrong!
King Vegeta:Good luck, farmer John!
Vegeta:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*blows up house*
Goku:Goddammit...you blew up my fuckin' house!
Vegeta:GBLARGH AMAMFRAAZIT GRRBLOW!
Goten:And i thought we were fucked up...
Trunks:GRBAZA MMMMFOWA KRAPLOW!
Goten:Ok, we are fucked up!
Vegeta:Must kill father!
Ghost of Bardock:ASSHOLE...DO YOU HAVE TO KILL EVERYONES DAD?!
Vegeta:WTF?...Frieza did that!
Bardock:Hey Gohan...wheres Freiza?
Gohan:Uh...Backroom at Le Bootay
Bardock:Thank you...*flies off*
Vegeta:What was the point of that?
*gets poked by a pencil*
HamtaroManme:Shut the fuck up,asshole and maybe i'll give you a cock!
Vegeta:Yes sir...i'll be quiet..
Goku:VEGETA!!! VEGETA!!! VEGETA..TALK YOU ASSHOLE!
Trunks:Shut the fuck up Goku...i want Vegeta to have a cock so maybe i can get a lil bro to steal weed for me!
Goku:Sorry dude..
Trunks:Stupid focker...
Vegeta:What was i gonna do?
Goten:You were gonna fuck your father...
Vegeta:REALLY?!!!
Goten:No,not really, i was kidding
Vegeta:Fuckin' kids...
King Vegeta:I'm gonna go back to Plant Vegeta and get you a brother.
Vegeta:Hey pops...i just had a thought...your FUCKIN' DEAD! Frieza raped you good and your dead...
King Vegeta:Dammit my disguise is broken...*takes off suit* I AM FRIEZA..THE RAPER OF KING VEGETA!!!
Goten:And Gohan too...
*gohan punches Goten*
Gohan:You said you'd keep it secret!!!
Goku:Oh shut up son...everyone knew it already...it was in the National Enquirer!
Frieza:Now Gohan...come peacefully to my lair and it wont hurt...too much!
Vegeta:God damn...this is lame...how many fucking times is Hamtaroman gonna have Frieza fail to rape Gohan?
HamtaroMan:Thats it...no cock for you Veggie!
Trunks:NO!!!!!!!!!! I WANTED A BROTHER FOR CHRISTMAS!!!
Vegeta:Ah shit...maybe next year...
Trunks:GAZZABWAGH ARMFALLEZA MITOO!!!!
Goten:Oh shit...there he goes again..
Trunks:Need some sexing...must goto Le Bootay!
Frieza:I bought the place...only gay men now!
Trunks:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gohan:YESSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bulma:So i'm unemployed?
Trunks:Not when i'm around! *showers Bulma in money*
Piccolo:Eww incest!
Gohan:What?...what about all those times you screwed your sis...
Piccolo:*grabs Gohan* SHUT UP!!!!*throws him in the ocean*
Chi-Chi:DONT THROW GOHAN INTO THE OCEAN!!!*slaps him*
Piccolo:But i'm straight now!
Krillin:WAAAH????
Chi-Chi:Thats no excuse for killing Gohan...
Piccolo:Sounded good enough to me...
Frieza:Here is my chance! *sneaks out to get Gohan*
Vegeta:*grabs Frieza*Not so fast gay boy...i can use you...
Frieza:In many kinky ways and positions?
Vegeta:EWW NO...FUCKIN SICK!...your gonna rape my ghost father and make him tell the truth about my mother!
Frieza:I've never raped a dead guy before...
Vegeta:Just think of it as Gohan...just not as juicy!
Goku:Aww sick...and i thought only Piccolo got it on with Gohan.
Gohan:*in the water*Theres too many guys to mention...
Goku:Ya'll hear something?
Goten:Its just Yamcha and Puar!
Yamcha:*in back room* IM READING A BOOK!
Trunks:Yah right..."How to fuck cats"
Goku:*faceplant* Oh thats great...
Goten:What the fuck pops? that was lame
Vegeta:SILENCE...back to the matter at hand
Trunks:Yah...Yamcha's hand on Puar!
Goku:*on the floor laughing* Oh lord...this kid is slayin' me...
Goten:I really need to have a not retarded father...
Vegeta:SILENCE INFIDEL!!! we need to address the situation here!
Trunks:We need to have Yamcha stop undressing Pua..*gets slapped by Vegeta*
Vegeta:DAMMIT SON..SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!
Trunks:Ok sorry...i'll be quiet now..
Goku:*pouts* Oh darn..
Goten:Darn?...god my dad is a pussy... and retarded!
Trunks:Yamcha is screwing a pu...*gets knocked out by vegeta*
Vegeta:GOD DAMN KID...WONT SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Goten:Man...you hit him pretty hard...
Vegeta:Was it something like this?! *knocks out Goten*
Goten:Hell naw...Bulma hits me harder during sex...*pases out*
Vegeta:Hate kids...why did i even have one?
Bulma:You never did...
Vegeta:Oh yah....FRIEZA...your...talents...are needed now!
Frieza:OK!
Vegeta:I want you to use any methods neccasary to exploit the truth of my mother from my father!
Freiza:It will be done...
*10 minutes later*
Vegeta:God that is a lot of screaming...
Goku:My fracking ears hurt...isn't that right Lefty?
Vegeta:Dont start that shit again...*knocks Goku out cold*
Goku:Damn..didn't now i was fighting Chi-Chi..*passes out*
Vegeta:Ah all alone...better make myself at home...*takes off pants*
Krillin:God dammit...OK...3 things...we are OUTSIDE! and i'm still here!
Vegeta:Ok...2 things...your not a person...and what was your third thing?
Krillin:Ok..2 things...I AM A PERSON DAMMIT...and 2nd...PUT SOME DAMN UNDERWEAR ON
Vegeta:Oh shit...*puts pants back on* sorry...
Krillin:Its ok...
Vegeta:But anyways, really...your not a person...you have to have a nose to be a person...your just...a...thing!
Krillin:I'M A PERSON, DAMMIT!
Vegeta:Ah fuck it..*knocks krillin out*
Krillin:ooh #18...you hit hard...for a girl *passes out*
Frieza:*panting*Ok...your father said it was cruel joke...your mom is still a whore...but she wasn't black...
Vegeta:Good...your time here is done! *beats the shit outta Frieza*
Frieza:You fight like Gohan...*passes out*
Vegeta:So many people i beat the shit out of...i'm a stud!
Frieza:I was kidding...your mom was a negro! *passes out*
Vegeta:BASTARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*the end*