Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Abysmal ❯ Chapter 2

Abysmal--part 2

The sun has not yet risen--but I awaken by my long ago acclimatization to the monotonous sagacity that I somehow get from the morning. I always get out of bed around this time, for of course this has caused me to be a bit of an early bird. Plus I like to have breakfast ready for my loving husband and darling sons by the time they disperse from their beds…….

It’s Saturday. Nothing to do but run the same old errands, you know like a trip to the grocery store and the post office while everyone else either sits on their asses and/or decides to be absent for the predominance of the day…which I really should appreciate for the ‘me’ time that I’ll be getting…right?

“Shit!” I curse quite distinctly as I burn my finger on the hot stove.

“You okay, ma?” I hear my youngest ask me as I face him with my injured finger in my mouth. “Of course baby, why wouldn’t I be? I just burned my finger, that’s all,” I force myself to smile and he smiles back while taking a seat at the kitchen table.

“I need to make a few runs,” I proclaim with my back turned as Gohan joins his brother at the table for breakfast. “I should be back in a while.”

“But I wanna come!” I turn around to see Goten’s face in a glowering frown. I couldn’t help a small chuckle. “You want to come with me?”

“Yes,” /That’s a surprise. He usually would want to stay with Gohan…./

I nod. “Okay,” I notice the empty seat next to Gohan and sigh. “Let your father know that I am going out and that I’ll be back shortly,” /Not that he tells anyone where he goes…./

“Okay mom,”

~~**~~**~~

“Get me a buggy, will you?” I ask my son while walking ahead. “Okay,” I hear him respond as I wonder into the fruits and vegetables aisle. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot a family. A family much like my own except they are…together. The man and the woman smiling and laughing amongst themselves perceptibly happy with one another’s presence, while their two sons run ahead of them.

“Hey!” I look over to see Goten’s arrival with my buggy. I look at the smiling boys face; reminding me of my own unhappiness. I feel my brows wrinkle as I look back at the couple before me. They are holding hands now, and I find myself getting a little covetous…and even a little sad at the quite poignant scene…to someone who’s not used to being shown affection.

“Ma!”

“Huh?” I answer, taken away from my current train of thought. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing sweetie,” I assure him as I walk away from the fruit. I hear the squeaky wheels of the buggy as he pushes it after me. I pull my grocery list out of my purse while in search for items from memory. I take one last look at the scene before I walk down the nearest aisle of the store. Skimming through container and box labels I see Goten stray away from me into the next aisle.

“Goten?” I call him as I trudge in his direction, “Goten, you can’t leave me,”

“ChiChi?”

“Huh?” I look up to see Yamcha’s grinning face. Usually I wouldn’t care to see the man but I couldn’t help but smile. He isn’t rugged looking as he usually is. He wore a black debonair suit that captured the contours of his perfectly sculptured body off very well and had his hair in a neat slick ponytail.

I know I’m staring as he begins to hold conversation after a brief pause, taking me away from my unusual thinking pattern. “How is everything?” He asks still smiling.

“Good,” I tell him trying to hide my discomfiture, “I can’t complain,” I lie to his alluring face, “You?”

“Great, you know I bought a house,”

“Ooo, did you?”

“Yeah. Not to far from Bulma’s matter o’ fact,” He says as we walk side by side down the aisle.

“Must be expensive huh?”

“Ah, not really. You know city life isn’t as expensive as you think….so how’s Goku?”

I sigh, “He’s fine…but you know he’s never home really,”

He chuckles, “Same ol’ Goku I see. I guess some things never change.”

“Yeah…you know, you really should drop by sometime,” I smile into his eyes, wondering where my usual aversion toward the man is. /Its probably because he looks so good today…if I saw him dressed down I wouldn’t be feeling like this…but even still…/

“Okay, yeah. I’ll definitely get around to it,”

I nodded, and looked over to be reminded that I have yet to find Goten, “Dammit!”

“What’s wrong?” He questions, eyes following mine.

“I lost my son…I’ve got to find him. See you later, okay?” I say frenetically as I scuttle in the opposite direction. I can still feel Yamcha’s eyes on me as I call out to my son. “Goten!”

“Huh?…I’m right here ma”

I turn around to see Goten with my buggy trailing at my footsteps. I roll my eyes, feeling like a complete idiot. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, honey,” I breath, “But try to stay close to me at all times,”

/God…I really need to learn to relax…/

~~**~~**~~

I sigh as I slam the squeaky door shut of the older model car that once belonged to my father. He had given it to us right before he died…which was around the same time Goten was born.

/Daddy…/ I smile at the very thought of his name, but I didn’t need to think of anything else that might have the tendency to add on to my tension. I sigh once more as I grab an arm load of groceries. /But I miss him so much…/

Feeling the emotions gather within me, I quickly shake it off as I see Gohan saunter toward me, “Need some help?” He smiles, his face so much like how my own should be.

“Uh, yeah. You can take these,” I hand him everything in my embrace.

“You don’t look so well,” he tells me, “I’ll get the rest…you should lie down for awhile.”

I force a smile, “okay.”

I walk ahead of him, hearing him call out to Goten behind me. As I enter the house and walk down the hall towards the back of the house, I glance inside of the rooms on the way in slight hopes of seeing Goku.

In slight hopes that he decided to stay today…but of course he is no where in sight.

/Who am I kidding…did I really think that even for a second?/ In immense disappointed, I turn into the threshold of the bathroom and close the door. /What’s wrong with me? Why am I letting myself get so upset?…I should’ve known it…right?/ I couldn’t help the feelings that came with the despondent thinking. Against my will, I feel my face crinkle as salty raindrops pour from my eyes….crying again.

As much as I would usually abhor doing such a thing…I just cant hold it in anymore…its too hard to keep living as if nothing is wrong….to keep hiding behind my thoughts and my feelings. I cover my mouth with the back of my hand to keep myself from bawling for superfluous attention.

I look at myself in the mirror. I look at the unattractive, plain middle aged mother before me. The gray strands of hair…the age lines forming around my eyes and at the side of my mouth, still visible through my contorted face, adding to my already disconcerting appearance. I stop sniveling to the sight and I lean in closer. I touch the mirror where my read teary eyes are being reflected.

I stare at myself as something mentally clouts me….

Part 3 coming soon.