Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Anatomy of Melancholy ❯ Shitake ( Chapter 5 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Higashi and Kibito give their guests a tour of Kaioshin-Kai. Varish finds a new source of amusement. Kibito finds out nightmares really do come true. Sin and Higashi nonsense. Crude humour courtesy of Varish.

Anime/Manga: Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Drama / Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 05.22.2005 | Pages: 4 | Words: 7.2K | Visits: 115 | Status: Completed

Chapter Five. Longer chapter this time. Should make for fun. Poor Kibito - that is all I am going to say. Lyrics in this chapter belong to Thievery Corporation, Lebanese Blonde. Great song, great music - check them out. Oh, and that scandalous thought Varish sends Kibito, it's from a song called Let Me Be Your Underwear, by Club 69. The song he quotes is from the B-52's, Monster (In My Pants). The second song is by the Barenaked Ladies, Pinch Me. Okay, on to the story, then.

Chapter Five: Shitake

Kaioshin peered at the demons through bemused black orbs. It had been ten minutes since the quartet had landed on the planets of the Gods. He had been enjoying the quiet drama as both gingerly crept about the lush foyer like meticulous felines, drinking in their lavish surroundings. Higashi tried to smother the tremour of pride that threatened to consume him. Of course, he couldn't turn a blind eye to the truth. The mansion was luxuriously decorated and posh even by elite standards. It felt nice to see that his charges seemed to echo these sentiments.

Too low to find my way,
Too high to wonder why.
I've touched this place before,
Somewhere in another time.
Now I can hear the sun,
The clouds drifting through the blinds.
A half a million thoughts,
Are flowing through my mind.

“Nice place you've got here, Holy Joe.” The male demon whistled, earning himself a critical and displeased glare from Kibito.

“You shall address Master Higashi as Higashi no Kaioshin. I am not certain of your breeding, but you are to conduct yourself with some semblance of class in the presence of myself and Master Higashi.” Kibito spit, rendering the sprightly and disrespectful demon a grim, asperous glare. Kibito refused to tolerate such indelicate social graces - and from a demon, at that.

“Okay, mister big as all outdoors,” Varish negotiated, putting his hands up in front of him, “don't get your knickers in a twist - I meant no harm by it.” He grinned, although he felt a bit alarmed at the austere look on the large mans face. Good grief, this one is going to be a right pain in the ass ... I can see that. Good for nothing prude.

“I am not a prude, and I am not a ...” Kibito began before Higashi silenced him.

“Kibito, let it go. It's okay.” Higashi soothed. He understood this might take some time. It reminded him of bringing in a pet - the older, more established pets became territorial, and it took time for them to adjust and come to their senses. Higashi almost laughed at that, picturing Kibito as a big, disgruntled, cantankerous old tom cat.

“Master, that is not funny.” Kibito admonished, sending his master a stern, hurt look out the corner of his eye. He did not appreciate being compared to a crotchety old cat. So, he had a penchant for being a touch snappish and choleric. He had good reason. Oh ... to be set alongside a petulant feline. His master could be so odd at times.

“So, you can read my mind. Okay ... go on.” The coltish demon dared, a nefarious glint tinting his eerily placid blue pools. Beside, him, Sin (who had settled considerably once she had gotten some aspirin from Higashi) got one of those sinking feelings in the pit of her stomach. She bet anything this was going to end on a sour note.

“I am not around to amuse you, child. But ... if you insist - just to quiet you.” Kibito concentrated, and then instantly regretted his decision. I wanna be your underwear, so I can touch you there ... and there ... and there. The stoic guardian blushed ten shades of red. “You prurient heathen!” He upbraided the laughing male demon, making Sin almost jump out of her skin. “Master,” He said turning to Higashi, “I demand these uncouth reprobates banished at once.” Kibito fought for an appeal.

“Kibito,” Higashi sighed, massaging his temples, “He is just looking to get a rise out of you. You're too predictable, sometimes.” He grinned, trying to keep from going into stitches himself at the flabbergasted look on the gargantuan pink guardians face. “I think a tour might do us some good. Come, Kibito, let us show our guests the sites and help them settle in.” The delicate God smiled, motioning the pair of demons along.

A satellite recalled your voice,
Sent me `round the world again.
All the night you've dreamt away,
Sent me `round my heart again.
One touch upon my lips,
And all my thoughts are clear.
I feel your smoky mist,
Up to the stratosphere.

So far, the group had toured the ground floor layout - the grandiose kitchen and dining room, the mammoth library, three casual reading rooms, a couple of comfortable parlors, and a lot of neat halls and spare rooms, that flourished in abundance. Sin fast made up her mind that this character had so much space he hadn't a decent clue one what to do with most of it.

“So, you and Kibbles decorate this place, or did you hire out?” The curious Caitiff prodded, gliding a hand atop one particular antique that caught his interest. It reminded him of one of those Foo Dog things that Sin adored so much. She had an obscene collection of them at home. Oh, right. He thought, sobering up.

“Master Higashi chose the interior,” Kibito elaborated, shooing the insatiable hands into retreat, “and do not call me Kibbles. I am Kibito.” He shot the discourteous house guest another strident glare, meriting a tickled laugh from the cumbersome demon. “You are incorrigible.” He snarled, becoming short on patience.

“Ooh - someone needs a nap.” The incorrigible one countered, almost busting a gut at the flushing guardian. Sin nudged him in the rib, shooting him a glare that said, must you get us kicked out our first day here? Of course, that only sent him into another fit of earsplitting laughter.

Higashi no Kaioshin sighed. It had been almost an hour, and Kibito and the male demon seemed predestined enemies. Higashi found him to be tolerable, though, and in contrast, the female appeared out right delightful. It's just going to take a little time, he assured himself. Kibito is too orthodox and punctilious for his own good. Not that this one is helping matters.

“Okay, I think we should continue this upstairs.” Higashi interjected into the heated quibbling. He thought of persuading Sin out of one of those aspirins. Some day this had been. God or not, a man needed his peace. Some surprise ... like a lot of things, I am not getting any. Oh, that doesn't sound right. I think I am spending too much time with Rou-Dai-Kaioshin-sama. He thought, a bashful blush colouring his orchid tinted cheeks.

“But, Master ...”

“Let it go, Kibito.”

“I am going to let you pick out your rooms. I am lending you the Southern wing. So, please, feel free to look around and find something that suits you. Once you decide, let me know, and I'll have Kibito bring up your bags.” Higashi smiled, ignoring the sore glare from Kibito. Kibito, of course, did not take to the idea of playing maid to a couple of nettlesome intruders. Not that he had any say.

“You're too kind.” Sin simpered, flashing them both a gratified smile. “I - thank you ... so much.” She nodded, trotting behind her euphoric companion and pondering room after room. She had trouble making up her mind - all of the rooms were so plush and opulent.

“I got dibs on this one.” Her companion broadcasted. He had chosen one done up in rich, smart tones of crimson and taupe. Pale pigmented walls bled into resplendent washes of flushing scarlet that coloured the bed linens and flamboyant furniture. Stylish period paintings and dramatic ornamentals dotted the room top to toe, and regal velvet curtains opened onto a palatial balcony overlooking one of the scattered gardens.

“It is yours.” Higashi nodded, feeling an increasing sense of pride spill through him. It had been so long since he had been able to treat anyone to his hospitality. It felt good. “Sin, are you not finding anything to your taste?” Higashi asked, stepping out from beside Kibito to stand alongside her.

“Oh ... of course. I - I think this one.” She confirmed, sighing and glancing about the milky, aqua-toned round room. It echoed elegant, liquid hues of eggplant and lucent, muted turquoise. Slight, subdued walls drained into imposing purple, rendering the room an obscure, ethereal, aura. Oriental rice paper partitions, bamboo print paintings and candle sconces blended together to lend the room intimate, cabalistic undertones that belied the clean, casual ambience.

“I told you.” Higashi grinned at Kibito. “Oh,” he said upon noticing the confused stare of the demoness, “I kidded Kibito earlier that, from what I had found out about you, I felt certain this is the room that would capture your interest.” He smiled, nodding as he glanced about the room.

“I suppose I am a bit obsessed with the colour purple.” She sighed. Behind them, her best friend burst out laughing. Higashi, of course, happened to be purple. Sin and Higashi had lost the plot, though, being too engrossed in the room and their own thoughts.

“Too bad you caught that headache.” Varish taunted as he leered suggestively at her. It took a minute, but the confounded demoness at last stumbled upon the punch line. Blushing and blood boiling, she turned her back to Higashi and started counting to ten. Higashi, being such a pristine innocent, had no clue what had the pair so up in the air.

“There's a monster in my pants, and it does a nasty dance - when it moves in and out, everybody starts to shout ... take that, monster!” The crude Caitiff sang as he doubled up in laughter on the floor. He simply could not resist an opening when one presented itself. (Authoress: Pardon the unintentional bad pun, please)

“I am thoroughly confused.” Higashi muddled. Kibito appeared just as befuddled.

“Ooh, you ...” Sin grumbled. Higashi and Kibito looked on in disoriented confoundment as the demure girl pounced her rhapsodic companion.

Too low to find my way,
Too high to wonder why.
I've touched this place before,
Somewhere in another time...

Higashi had concluded their tour, at long last, and decided a bit of tranquil seclusion might be a good idea. End it on an optimistic note. He and Kibito had helped the pair settle into their rooms, and neither had seen them since. Probably quite tired, I imagine. Other than the slight altercation upstairs and the ongoing feud between Kibito and his smug nemesis, there hadn't been a problem. Besides, it's nice to be in the company of other people for a change. He sat curled up in one of the ground floor studies, trying to read but doing little more than spinning his wheels.

Higashi closed his book to further ponder his house guests. The man, dressed in a simple Catholic Cossack, had looked to be of average stature, slender, possessing sharp, almost exotic, European features and clean, crisp blue eyes on a backdrop of light, lucid skin. The female had come draped in a clean, prim black robe. She was decidedly more demure in height (although a good four inches or so taller than he), thin, possessing delicate, feline features and pale skin that pleasantly accentuated her upswept duskish hair and piercing dark chocolate eyes. Both seemed unpredictable, but cordial enough to be tolerable.

I could get used to them, I suppose.

He sighed, about to open his book again, but a sound coming from the foyer piqued his curiosity. Quiet as mousework, he tiptoed along the hall and around the corner to find none other than Sin. She appeared to be scouting for something ... or perhaps someone. She had abandoned her earlier attire in favour of a plush, comfortable looking, floor skimming, jade green bath robe. Oh, so she took a bath. I hope she feels better.

“Sin - looking for something?” He gently queried her. She spun around so suddenly that he almost felt ashamed for disturbing her. It seemed he had dealt her quite a start. “I am terribly sorry. I did not mean to startle you.” He apologized. She starts much too easy. I barely spoke above a whisper. She looks too frightened. He noted, not liking the path his thoughts were taking.

“No it's okay. I just ... I - you, to be honest.” She confessed, blushing a pale shade of pink. “I am sort of hungry.” She began, only to be interrupted by an obnoxious rumbling from her stomach. “Okay, more like famished. I don't suppose ...” she motioned a timid hand in the direction of the kitchen, her eyes glistening ... almost pleading. Something just isn't quite right here.

“Of course you can eat.” Higashi laughed, amused to no end by this ones bashful politeness. “In fact, I might join you. Oh ... that is, if you don't mind.” He added, hesitating. She might not want company. I hadn't thought of that.

“I don't mind ... not in the least.” She said brightening, much calmer he could see. He sighed in relief and smiled cordially, glad to see her acting more like she had earlier. It disturbs me that she acted so afraid of me. People that act so frightened typically have good reason ... I wonder what that reason could be.

“I am honoured. Has your friend eaten - might he care to join us, too?” He asked, inclining his head slightly to the girl trotting a short distance behind him.

“Oh, no - I asked him, but he said he is more tired than anything. So, he's sleeping.” Sin shrugged nonchalantly.

“I see. Come, then. Let us find something good before Kibito gets to it.” Higashi joked, giggling as Sin trailed him like an obedient pet to the disgustingly large kitchen. He hoped she kept in light spirits. He just could not stand seeing people so conflicted. It bothered him. It made him feel helpless, and he hated the thought of anyone burdened by such anguish.

He opened the large steel refrigerator, poking his head inside and taking quick inventory. He seen Kibito hadn't eaten the leftovers from last night's lasagna - that looked rather good at the moment. Or, perhaps some fruit and cottage cheese. He opened one of the containers, finding it to be some sort of Oriental noodle. He opened another, and this one looked like baked apples. But I need to send Kibito to the store. I see we're beginning to run short on mayonnaise and cream cheese. I don't want those bagels to go to waste.

It's the perfect time of year.
Somewhere far away from here.
I feel fine enough I guess.
Considering everything's a mess.

“So, Sin ... see anything that appeals to the palette?” He got no response, and after about half a minute, he looked to his side ... only to find her gone. That's odd. But, I thought ... Poking his head around the gargantuan door and chancing a skeptical glance about the room, he found her sitting alone at the table, proper and prim ... and looking dreadful out of her element. I do not like the looks of this at all. He thought, his features darkening. I could just make it clear to her that I do not mind her going through things, but for some reason I doubt that is going to do much good. I suppose the only option I have is to pick something for her and then have a talk on the matter later.

There's a restaurant down the street.
Where hungry people like to eat.
I could walk but I'll just drive.
It's colder than it looks outside.

“Here you go.” Higashi smiled as he set the glass of iced tea and plates in front of her. On one sat a steaming mound of meat and spring vegetables smothered in Oriental noodles and a delicious smelling dark sauce. On the other, a moderate portion of fresh peaches and pears and a considerable helping of chilled cottage cheese. “I hope you like it. I wasn't sure on your preferences, so I tried to choose something safe.”

It's like a dream you try to remember,
But it's gone,
Then you try to scream,
But it only comes out as a yawn,
When you try to see the world beyond your front door.
Take your time,
Is the way I rhyme, gonna make you smile,
When you realize that a guy my size might take a while,
Just to figure out what all this is for.

“Oh, thanks so much. It looks fantastic.” Sin licked her lips, almost drooling as she smiled up at him adoringly. “I hope I did not put you through too much trouble.” Her happiness abated at that.

“No, of course not. I did invite you, and I wouldn't have done it had I not wanted to.” He assured her as he took his place across from her, noticing that she did not begin her meal until he did his. She has such refined manners. I wonder if I should expect the same from her consort. He mused, alongside fears that vampires ate like Saiyans. Kibito won't be too keen on that. He hates making one trip a week to the grocery. I loathe if I need him to do it every day. He nibbled his noodles pensively at the thought, not too fond of the horrible, gruesome pictures his mind sought to conjure up just then.

It's perfect time of day.
To throw all your cares away.
Put the sprinkler on the lawn.
And run through with my gym shorts on.

Of course, he soon enough found out that vampires ate just like anyone else. In sensible moderation.

Take a drink right from the hose.
And change into some drier clothes.
Climb the stairs up to my room.
Sleep away the afternoon.

“I take it you must feel better.” Higashi grinned as he politely patted his mouth and put the spent napkin in the center of his plate. His guest had finished a couple of minutes before he had. She had nearabout inhaled her food and a couple of times Higashi worried she might choke. Poor thing, it's a shame to see her so impoverished.

“I do. I can not thank you enough. I honestly can not remember the last time I had anything so good.” She beamed, taming a stray piece of hair that had broken free from her elaborate upswept do behind a triple pierced ear. It was the truth - that, and she had not eaten in going on three days. She only hoped she could keep it from coming back up on her later.

She is a simple one to please, at least. Higashi found that quite endearing. Her domesticated bent and hospitable poise put him at ease. She seems a touch too thin, though. I hope it is just high metabolism. I suppose being a vampire that makes sense. He shrugged.

Silence prevailed for the next ten minutes. Sin busied herself observing a bird that had landed outside on the ledge. Higashi spent his time bouncing from thought to thought - from debating what to tack on to his grocery list, to should he indulge in a slice of apple pie, to keeping Kibito from murdering his nemesis, to the relationship of Sin and ...

Pinch me.
Pinch me.
God, please ...
Tell me I'm still asleep.

“Sin, I hope this does not appear a rude question, but you and your friend, is he your - or, that is to say - I am curious of your relationship.” No, that isn't right. I need to be more careful about jumping to conclusions. I do not wish to insult her should I be mistaken in my presumption.

“I beg your pardon?” Sin turned to him, ignoring the frolicsome bird outside on the ledge. Kaioshin almost laughed at the abashed flush painting her cheeks. She is such a curious creature.

On an evening such as this.
It's hard to tell if I exist.
If I pack the car and leave this town.
You'll notice that I'm not around.

“I just asked about the relationship ... you and your friend.” Higashi reiterated, stretching kittenishly and stifling a lethargic yawn. I need a nap.

“Relationship ... I lost the plot.” Sin blanked. She had a bad habit of getting lost in thought and then it took her an age of years for you to bring her back around. She had the smarts, but her concentration at times left a lot to be desired. It wasn't altogether her fault, though, mind you. Sin had a lot of issues.

“Is he your ... your ... paramour?” Higashi gulped, blushing a curious shade of purple. He had not meant to be so blunt, but he had no other choice. It just popped out on impulse. Oh, perfect. I can tell by her expression that I have upset her. Rats. I am going to stretch my mouth out of shape if I keep putting my foot in it like this.

Sin stared at him. The pupils of her piercing doe eyes had dilated to double their normal. Her eloquent feline features had contorted into a sour grimace and the slender, manicured hand that the mortified deity could see had latched onto the table cloth in a fierce fist. It sounded at first as if she were growling. Instead, though, to Higashi's shock and surprise ... she started to laugh.

I could hide out under there.
I just made you say underwear.
I could leave but I'll just stay.
All my stuff's here anyway.

“I ... you ... me and ... oh ... Christ on a cracker ...” Sin sputtered amidst bouts of melodic laughter. “Oh, God no ... oops, a thousand pardons, forget I said that.” She stumbled out, holding her head in her hands and feeling a right infidel for slipping on her tongue like that. For some queer reason, though, it only made the pear-shaped situation all the funnier.

“Could you - just - Sin, it is not that funny. Stop laughing, please.” Higashi chided her, blushing and squirming in his chair, trying to smother the insatiable urge to scamper up to his room and not come out for the next three millennia. And I thought she was so nice. That did not last long.

“Oh, the heck it's not.” Sin's laughter plimmed, “Good grief - us doing the bedroom boogie ... sure, when pigs fly.” She giggled, going into a terrible fit of stitches, both because of the ridiculousness of the idea, and the flustered, embarrassed look Higashi was sporting. She couldn't help but think him cute. His exotic black orbs shimmered in contempt, his fetching, sculpted lilac features rebuked her ridicule, and he looked obscenely adorable with that stray lock of white hair fluttering into his eyes as he shifted positions in unadulterated irritation. “Oh, stop it ... you're going to make my mascara run.” Sin tried to calm herself, softly dabbing about her eyes with a clean napkin.

Higashi glared at her out the corner of one penetrating obsidian eye. He probably wouldn't have found her plight so amusing had she not been teasing him as pitilessly as she seen fit. Karma works in mysterious ways. He smirked, beginning to giggle.

“You're a mite short on the uptake, laughing boy.” Sin snorted. She had become so snug and comfortable through the course of things that she had all but forgotten that the handsome, petite gentleman sitting across from her was God in the flesh. He had fed her. He had reached out to her. He had treated her not to the usual malice and scorn, but to a hot meal and cordial conversation. It was almost too good to be true.

Pinch me.

“Maybe, but at least I'm not the one flaunting a dashing pair of raccoon eyes.” Higashi snickered, relishing the adorable, panic stricken look she adopted. He casually produced a small hand mirror, and handed it to her. Oh, this should be good. That should teach you to tease me.

“Oh ... shit.” Sin cringed, catching her mistake a second to late. “Sorry ... force of habit.” She gestured an apologetic hand in his general direction. “Oh, great. I thought this was waterproof ... as if.” She grumbled, trying to clean the mascara and at the same not disturb the rest of her makeup. I doubt I am ever going to understand the female fascination with makeup. Higashi thought, shaking his head.

Try to figure out what all this is for.

“I think I got all of it.” Sin sighed, ruffling a dark chocolate bang that had fallen loose from its hairspray prison.

“I don't see any reason for you to be so upset. You look perfectly fine to me.” Higashi tried to assure her, taking a leisurely sip of his iced tea. It did not seem to settle her any, though. It's like she didn't even hear me. Girls can be so strange, sometimes. “Sin, I am curious to something else.” He paused, both gauging her temperament and to be certain he had her attention. “In the foyer, earlier ... I startled you.”

Pinch me.

“It's nothing. I do not care to get into it.” She snapped, not letting him complete his thought. It did not matter. She had no intention of going into detail on something he, she had no doubt in her mind, could not possibly comprehend.

“I might surprise you.” Higashi softly prodded. So, I was right. Question is, do I try to persuade her to bring it out into the open ... or is that going to do her more damage? I hope not.

“Look,” she spit, slamming the mirror on the table and shutting her eyes tight, “I am a person that appreciates her isolation. I ask that you not go reading my thoughts absent my consent. I can not go into this. Just, please, drop it.” She breathed the last part, trying as hard as she could not to cry in front of him.

Try to see the world beyond your front door.

“I'm sorry. I am. I - you're right. I shouldn't have done that.” Higashi felt at once ashamed and insulted. He had only been trying to help, but then again, he understood it was rude to go and violate her privacy like that. I just can not seem to get anything right with her. I keep digging myself in deeper. Oh, I do wish she wasn't so horridly over sensitive. I heard her kind to be volatile, but I had no idea they would be this touchy.

Pinch me.

“I - I think I need some sleep. I thank you again for the food, and ... goodnight.” Sin faltered precariously, staggering to her feet and darting out of the room so fast that Higashi could not so much as bid her an informal parting. He stared on at her retreating figure as she fled through the kitchen to the foyer and out of his sight, the only remnants that remained of her the stack of dirtied plates, the shattered mirror ... and the arresting scent of dark incense.

I didn't even get the chance to talk to her about the food.

Try to figure out what all this is for.

End of Chapter Five

I think of all I have written so far, I like this chapter the best. I had a lot of fun with it. It might seem odd that Higashi would warm up to Sin so fast, but he is not falling ass over tea kettle for her - that should be quite clear. In simple, he is trying to help her feel (because she is an invited guest) comfortable and he is concerned with some of her behaviour. So ... I like the ongoing feud of Kibito and Varish. It cracks me up, because Kibito is a perfect target for those kinds of antics. To Varish, Kibito is a dream come true. Of course, to Kibito, Varish is a flesh and blood nightmare. Hence, you get comedy. Joy. Enjoy it while it lasts because things are about to get much darker.