Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ BANG! ❯ BANG! ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

By: Teari

Title: BANG!

Rating: Pg

Warnings: A little silly-ness, possible OOC-ness, and a note that `Rochambeau' is the same thing as Rock, paper, siccors. All-around sillyness Fic inspired by Drabble Week 36, “BANG!”

“What is it?” Vegeta's voice was low, as if to prevent others from over-hearing. The object lay between the two of them, with the faint smell of smoke, and a diet-after taste listing on his tongue.

Goku shrugged. “I'm…not entirely sure.”

“Not entirely sure?”

“The only things that I know that cause smoke are fire, ki-blasts, and clothes.”

“Ah. I see.” Vegeta paused, as Goku poked it. He seemed fascinated by it. “Well, then, since I don't know what it is, and you don't know what it is, why don't we find out?”

“Cool! Let's ask Goten and Trunks!”

“Why those two? Why not Bulma or Gohan? I'm sure they know what it is.”

“Probably because we're right behind you, Uncle Vegeta!” Goten's over-hearty voice caused Vegeta to give him an icy glare. “Hee….sorry.” He offered a sheepish smile.

“Whatcha doing?” Trunks asked.

“Well, we're trying to figure out what this….thing is.” Goku waved a hand over it.

“Let me look.” The demi-sayjin bent down, his finger lightly brushing the covering. The item moved, wriggling like a snake.

“Cooooooool.” Goten breathed. Goku nodded, his face all excited. Vegeta slowly backed up, as Trunks poked it again.

“You know, that's pretty neat.”

“Let me poke it!”

“Do either of you know what it is?” Vegeta asked, as Goku's son repeatedly poked it with a stick.

Nothing happened.

Goten pouted.

“Cheer up, son, you'll get one moving soon, I'm sure.”

“Nope.” Trunks sighed at his friend as he stood up stretching. “I've never seen one before.” He turned, then blinked. “Hey-there's another one.”

Goten got to it before anyone, bending over it as though to protect it from the sun. “I got it to move!”

Vegeta hid a wince-damn that boy's vocal cords! Trunks gave Goten a high-five, as Goku patted him on the back. “See, what'd I tell you?”

“Oh, Hi, Gohan. Piccolo.” Trunks nodded to the both of them as they landed.

“What are you four doing out here?”

“We're trying to figure out this smoking-wriggly thing. Wanna look?”

Gohan shrugged. “Sure. I haven't got anything else to do.”

“Not really.”

Oh, come on, Piccolo.” Goku grinned. “It's not going to bite you.”

“Sure, Son. That's what you said last time.” Piccolo's voice let out a low growl. Goku shrugged-as if to say it wasn't his fault Piccolo got bit-and looked over his son's shoulders.

“You know, if I knew that we'd be having a party out here, I would have brought stuff to drink.” Vegeta sneered, now three feet away from the rest of the group.

“He's getting cranky, isn't he?”

Trunks nodded. “Definitely, Piccolo.” Trunks lowered his voice. “However, to be fair, Dad doesn't like things that crawl. I'm sure he's waiting to blast it from here to high-heaven once we know what it is.”

“I can hear you both, you know that right?”

Piccolo grinned, and shook his head.

“Well, Gohan? What's the verdict?”

“Yeah! Is it an animal? Will Mom let me keep it?”

Goku held back a laugh-he actually ended up chocking on it-and Gohan shook his head at Goten. “No, Mom will not let you keep it. Especially not if you keep poking at it like that. Besides, I don't know what it is.”

“Awe…Gohan! You can't be serious! Mom Always does what you tell her!” Goten whined.

“No, she doesn't. But, Piccolo might-”

“No.”

“But, you haven't even looked at it.” Gohan had to speak up over Goku's laughing fit.

“Kid, if you don't know what it is, then I don't know what it is.”

“Great. So where does that leave us, then?” Vegeta's harsh voice cut in, disdainfully glaring at the two objects and Goku.

“Well, there are others who might know.” Trunks added reasonably.

“Like who?”

“Well, we might for one.” Yamcha's voice cut in, surprising Goten as he began to fall over. “What do you want to know?”

“This thing here, Yamcha.” Gohan responded, relieved that he didn't have to catch his younger brother. “Hello, Tein, Choutsu.”

Choutsu sat down next to the object, and frowned. “It doesn't like being poked. Who would be poking it?”

“Ah…I think we need to figure out exactly what it is first, Choutsu.” Tein said, as he and Yamcha watched Trunks, Goten, and Goku all turn shades of red. Vegeta smirked, Piccolo grumbled, and Gohan sighed.

“You know, it kinda reminds me of a hot dog.”

Everyone turned to look at Yamcha. No one made a sound.

“What?! Don't tell me none of thought of it!”

“It doesn't like that thought.” Choutsu said primly.

“Although, you know, Vegeta, that is a good point of Yamcha's.”

“That's a good point?” Sarcasm dripped off the Prince's words.

“Well, I am hungry.”

“You're always hungry.”

Gohan sighed, and shook his head. “Dad, didn't Mom give you any food capsules? While we're waiting, you could eat.”

“NO!” Goten shouted. “If Dad eats, I eat!”

“Don't worry, Goten. I'm not going to eat. Chi-Chi didn't give me any capsules.”

“Choutsu, how exactly are you able to tell what…that thing is feeling?” Piccolo called.

The small man shrugged. “I don't know. I just am.”

Tein crouched down low to the object. “Well, I don't recognize it.” He frowned at Yamcha. “And I'm guessing from his “hot-dog” remark, neither does Yamcha. What about you, Choutsu?”

“No, Tein. I only know what it knows. And it doesn't know what it is.”

“I guess that's a relief.” Everyone jumped, and turned, taking up various fighting positions as Seventeen strode through, and laughed at the small mass. His voice was smooth, and he shook his head. “Don't worry about it. I'm sure it'll be ate eventually.”

“What are you doing here?” Piccolo took up the challenge.

The cyborg shrugged. “Watching mostly. I was passing by-and I saw you all gathered around. It got me curious. Seeing what you're looking at, I'm wishing I hadn't stopped by. It's frightfully boring.”

“So you know what it is?”

“No. But, I'll definitely stay, and see how long it takes you all to find out.”

“How…generous of you.” Vegeta called. “I assume that means you're curious about that thing as well?”

“What thing?” Krillan spoke up.

“Krillan! What are you doing here, man?” Goku stepped through the crowd, and shook his hand. “We're looking at this smoky-wriggly-feeling-hot doggie-thing.”

“Hot doggie thing? Goku, are you sure it's just not moldy food?”

“I think I'd be more worried about the wriggling, personally, Krillan.” Eighteeen's voice replied. “Marron, honey, don't touch. It's got nasty germs, and Mommy doesn't want you to get your hands dirty.”

“But-But…Trunks and Goten did!”

Eighteen glanced at the offending teens, as they tried to act innocence. Gohan stifled a chuckle when he saw Goten pretend to whistle while rocking back and forth on his heels. Seventeen snorted, Vegeta put a restraining hand on Trunks, while Yamcha, Tein, Choutsu, and Piccolo all appeared to be playing a hand of rock, paper, siccoors. “Tough. You're not Goten or Trunks.”

Marron reluctantly let go, and the object tumbled out of her hands, leaving a grey, slimly trail. “EWWW! Mommy look! I got stuff all over `em! Make it go away!”

Eighteen sighed. “Marron…I can't believe this.”

Trunks looked down, and gave Eighteen a handkerchief. “Here, use this.”

“Hey. Trunks, we didn't get this stuff on us, did we?”

“I don't know. Look at your hands, Dufoos.” Trunks looked at his hands. “Nope, not me. What about you?”

“No.” He sounded disappointed. “Why does Marron have all the fun?”

“Eighteen, honey, do you know what this thing is?”

“No, and I really don't care. I'm trying to get this sticky stuff off of Marron. Why she has to pick up stuff after I tell her `no', I don't understand.”

“Kids do that.” Vegeta replied. “I do believe, however, that the boys wish they'd have Marron's luck.”

“They can have it.”

Krillen eyed the thing warily. “It looks familiar, but I can't place it.”

Goku frowned, then looked at it again. “You know, I do believe you're right.”

Vegeta snorted. “First, you don't know what it is, now, you think it looks familiar? Wake me when you have a clue, Kakarott.”

“Hey, Seventeen, what to play rock, paper siccors?” Yamcha called.

“Why would I want to play that?”

“Because,” replied Choutsu, “Tein found five more, Piccolo's got eight, Yamcha has three, and I have four. We need another player. The one with the most of these things wins.”

“Wins what?”

“A video game from each of us.” Yamcha said. “Whoever loses a round has to go out and look for some for the other players.”

Seventeen shrugged, intrigued. He always did like competition. “Sure. Why not?”

“I wish I could play that game.” Goten sounded depressed.

“You mean you don't know how to play rock, paper sicciors?” Trunks sounded amazed.

“No.” He sighed. “I only know how to play `Rochambeau'. It's not the same at all.”

“….If you say so.”

“THERE YOU ARE!” Chi-Chi shouted, scaring her sons, Trunks, and most of Yamcha's RPS group to jump behind Goku. “I've looked all over for you three! Aren't you going to come home? Dinner's waiting?”

“Dinner?” Goku sounded hopeful, and Yamcha's RPS group got right back to playing. Krillan grinned, and Eighteen still wasn't done with Marron's hands yet.

“Dad-what about the thing?” Gohan tried to keep his voice low, but it didn't work.

“Thing?”

“This!” Marron held up the wriggly object, her eyes shining. Both Vegeta and Chi-Chi jumped back.

“Well, so far, we know they don't like being poked, dropped, and called hot-dogs.” Choutsu said as he made a small tut-tut sound.

“Marron, I said NO.” Eighteen gave her daughter a light smack on her rear, and she welled up in tears. “Stop that. I didn't hurt you that badly. Besides, if you hadn't picked up, you wouldn't be crying now.”

“Mommy's right, Marron. You should have listened to her.” Krillan said, when she turned to him.

“What is it?” Chi-Chi asked, as a disgusted look overcame her face.

Goten shrugged. “We don't know. Can I have it as a pet?”

“You want that, slimy, sticky thing as a pet?”

“You're leaving out smoky and moving.” Vegeta snickered.

Chi-Chi shivered. “Goku, just what kinds of things have you been telling my baby boy?”

“Uh…”

“Hopefully not the same thing's Gohan's been saying.” Videl quipped, as Pan ran to give her daddy a hug. “You're late, too, Gohan. We were supposed to have a nice, romantic dinner for two tonight, remember?”

“V-Videl!” Gohan blushed as the two women stared at him. “I haven't been telling Goten anything! Honest!” He turned his attention back to his wife. “ Besides-this thing-we don't know what it is! It could be a menace. We have to watch it.”

Videl gazed around, her eyebrow raising as she saw all the fighters assembled. Frowning when she saw Yajarobie, Master Roshi, and the ditzy Maron playing with Piccolo, Tein, Choutsu, Yamcha, and Seventeen as Pan, Trunks, and Goten watched, she snorted. “Riiiight. All of you are watching those…things.”

“Well…I didn't realize Maron, Yajarobie, or Master Roshi were here, but otherwise, yes.”

“I came because she came.” Master Roshi pointed to Maron.

“And I came because I wanted to win video games!” She jumped up and down, causing everyone (except Piccolo) who was playing with her to grin happily.

“And I want to beat Maron at something other than eating.” Yajarobie mentioned.

“Speaking of scores, what is the score now?” Seventeen asked.

“Uh…Piccolo still as eight, you have two, and… Maron has twenty-eight.” Trunks said. “Wow…she's good.”

Goten nodded. “Uh-huh.”

“These things are dangerous?” Videl and Chi-Chi asked at the same time.

“Only to my daughter.” Eighteen stood up, looking grimly satisfied. “Look at what I had to pry off of her hands twice.” She held out Trunks's dirty handkerchief. It was soaked in the grey slime.

Krillan sighed. “I don't suppose either of you know what it is?”

“Yeah, Chi! I bet you could tell us. It really means a lot.” Goku grinned, giving his wife a quick hug. “Once we know what it is, we'll be home for dinner.”

“Well, you can just forget it. I'm not leaving without you, Gohan.”

“…Goku, Neither Videl or I know what it is. I'm sorry.”

“Hey Guys!” Bulma and Bura waved from their jet. “Why is everyone all the way out here? Are we having a reunion that I didn't know about?”

“Hardly.” Vegeta snorted. “See those things? The moving, hot-doggie, don't-touch-or-drop, smoky, slimy things?” Vegeta was now five feet away from the nearest moving thing.

“Yes…”

“We don't know what they are.” Vegeta waved a hand to Gohan and shrugged. “He thinks it could be a planet-destroyer.”

“And you've all been out here all day?” Bulma asked.

“Yes.”

“Huh.”

“Wow…no offence, Daddy, but you need to get a hobby. Standing out in the sun can't be good for you.”

“Thank you, Bura. I'll take that under advisement.” His voice was mild, but tense.

“Let me see these things…I bet I'll know what they are.”

“Poor Daddy. No one knows what it is, huh?”

“No, they don't. And somehow…it turned into a betting match with rock, paper, siccors.”

“Really? What are they betting?”

“Video games.”

“oohhh….I'm going play. I need new ones.”

Vegeta shrugged, as his voice took on a long-suffering tone. “Almost everyone else is playing now, so I don't see why you can't.”

“Bura-before you do, take a look at these. You don't recognize them, do you?”

“Woman! You don't know what they are either?!”

“Hmm…No, Mom. However, they do kinda remind me of something…but I'm not sure what.”

“Me too.” Bulma ignored Vegeta; he'd get over it.

“Really?” Tein looked up. “Hey-let's all take another look. Do these look familiar to anyone else?”

“You didn't answer me, woman.”

Hesitantly, various voices rang out, and hands were raised. Tein took a count, and found out that almost everyone there-the only exceptions being Master Roshi, Mister PoPo, Dende (when did they show up?), Yajarobie, and Maron. “Hmmm…doesn't that seem strange to anyone else?”

“I don't have to.”

“You said you knew what they were.”

“Well, yeah, I guess it does, Tein, now that you mention it.” Yamcha threw out.

“No. I said `I thought I knew what they were'. There's a difference.” Bulma said sweetly.

“But, who could we all know who'd have these…kind of things just…sorta laying around?” Videl's common sense re-asserted it's self.

“No, there's not.”

“Yes, there is.”

“Hmm…well, it's someone who lives alone-or we'd all know who it'd be by now. And it's not Seventeen because he doesn't know what they are.”

“Thanks for that ringing endorsement, sister dear.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Oh, you're welcome, brother.”

“Okay…and it's not Master Roshi for that same reason, right?” Goten asked.

Trunks rolled his eyes. “Yes, It's no. But not because of that.”

“Oh. Then why?”

“Because Eighteen, Marron, and Krillan all live with him, idiot.”

“Nooo.”

“Yeees.”

“Well, that also leaves out Master Roshi's sister too…and Korin.” Bura made a face. Why did her parents always have to argue?

“No.”

“Yes.”

“And we can rule out everyone here...” Gohan put in.

“Don't forget Grandpa Hercule, Daddy! He doesn't like slimy things!”

“Don't worry, sweat pea. I didn't forget Hercule.”

“Not.” Vegeta ground his teeth. This woman was impossible!

“Is.”

“Let's not forget my father, everyone. I don't think he knows about this either.”

“Oh!” Goku hit himself upside the head. “I completely forgot about him, Chi! But you're right. I can't picture Ox King knowing about this.”

“Not.”

“IS.”

“Well, this may be a bit late…but I know that It's none of the Tower's or the Lookout's people.” Mister PoPo put in.

“And I can vouch for all of the gods.” Dende grinned. “Most of them don't think Earth is worth any trouble at all.”

“NOT.”

“IS.”

“But…what do they do?” Maron asked. “They're not video games, are they?”

Choutsu hung his head. “No, they're not video games. But these things are hungry.”

“Well…if that doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what does.”

“I completely understand we're you're coming from Piccolo.” Yajarobie said while tearing off a piece of his chicken leg. He increased his voice to be heard over Vegeta's and Bulma's voices. “You think they eat Chicken?”

“NOT.”

“IS.”

“What good is Chicken going to do these people, ehy?”

“Well…” Yajarobie paused, then shook his head. “I guess, if they'll hungry they'll eat it, Master Roshi.”

“Uh…I don't think they eat chicken, Yajarobie.”

“That's good to know Krillan.”

“What makes you so sure?” Trunks asked.

“Not.”

“Is.”

Krillan pointed to Marron. Eighteen froze, her face a mask of horror.

“Marron, honey, does that hurt?”

“Does what hurt, Daddy?”

*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*

Everyone-except for Eighteen-stopped what they were doing to look up. Launch came up, her bazooka gun landing nearby, and the Z senshi formed an outer layer of ki so that the blasts didn't hurt them.

“WHAT IN TOOTIN' TARNATION ARE Y'LL DOIN' HERE?! GET OFF MAH PROPERTY!”

“Please-!” Eighteen stood up, her face stern. “GET this thing off of my daughter's face! It's-it's-” Here, she paled but Krillan put his hand in hers to give her strength. “It's eating her!”

Launch paused, then frowned. “I don't know…”

“Launch-you know me, right?”

The blonde-gun tooting person paused, then a curt nod to Goku. “I do.”

“Then get this…thing off of this girl. We'll all leave after that.”

“NO. Y'll here to steal mah babies.”

Bulma rolled here eyes. “No, we're not.” She took the handkerchief out of Eighteen's hands, and put it into Launch's face, causing her to sneeze. She became Randi, and she blinked. The handkerchief fell to the ground. “Huh? Tein, what are you doing here?”

“I-Uh…” he blushed, then sighed. He wouldn't get out of this. Not easily, anyway. “I came to see you.”

“This is a wonderful reunion, I'm sure. But, my daughter here needs help.”

Randi's violet gaze latched on to the little girl, and she looked shocked. “Oh, my. I'm so sorry. I didn't know my grey-skinned leeches could get onto a face. Have her hold steel.” Taking out a bit of salt, she sprinkled some on to Marron's face where the leech was. It fell off, and shriveled.

“They really don't like that.” Choutsu announced. “But, they object to the term `leech'. They still don't know what they are, but they know they aren't leeches.”

Vegeta, Eighteen, and Piccolo all gave Choutsu a cold stare.

“Not…leeches?” Eighteen's voice was barely contained.

“They… sucked blood. And they wriggled.”

“And why would they know what they are?” Piccolo growled.

“Goten.”

“Yes, Mom?”

“You're not getting it as a pet.”

“AWWWW, MOM!”

“No, Goten. And that's Final.”

Goten pouted again.

“AHHHHH-COOOO!” Randi sneezed again, and her hair once more melted into blonde.

“What y'll doin' here?” She pulled out a gun. “Y'll have till I count to three before I start shootin' ya.”

“Fine! We're leaving already.”

“One.”

“Everyone on the jet! I'll take us all out to eat! ” Bulma called as the Z senshi steeped forward. Launch drew her bazooka once she realized that her gun was too small.

“Two.”

Soon, Eighteen, Marron,Chi-Chi, Videl, Pan, Bulma, Bura, Trunks, Goten, Mister PoPo, Yajarobie, Maron, Dende, Master Roshi, Yamcha, Gohan, Seventeen, Krillan, Ox King (how on earth did he get in a seat?), Choutsu, Tein, Piccolo, and Vegeta were all inside.

“Three.”

Bulma took off, just as Launch shot her bazooka. Goku intercepted it, and pushed it down to the ground (away from Launch, naturally), and teleported out of there, before she realized what happened.

“Ah. I took good care of them, didn't I babies? Come to ma-ma. I'm not gonna let nothin' happen to my little grey-smoking leeches.”