Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Brief House Hold ❯ TORTED TURKEY DAY (BHH episode 4) ( Chapter 5 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Bulmasan666 
Anime/Manga: Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 12.28.2003 | Pages: 3 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 221 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 12.28.2003 | Pages: 3 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 221 | Status: Completed
TORTED TURKEY DAY:
(A/N: Present day, Capsule Corp, Thanksgiving. Am I the only one who notices that this is almost the DBZ version of the Osbournes? That would explain why I listen to Ozzy when I write this. *Leaves to paint crosses on the door* Now read it or I'll bite your head off.)
Bulma: Oh ****!
Vegeta: Nani?
Bulma: The turkey! TRUNKS! Where's Bra? *Spazzing out*
Vegeta: Over there. *Points to the table where Bra is chugging Vodka* O_O
Bulma: BRA, DON'T GIVE ERIKA THAT!
Bra: *drooling* haha! Too late!
Vegeta: Hey brat! That's my Vodka! X x
Bulma: TRUNKS!
Trunks: What now mom? Can't I even fu- sleep in peace? *Blushes slightly*
Bulma: Go buy a turkey! :p
Trunks: NANI?
Bulma: Go, just get a preheated one. The kind you put in the microwave.
Trunks: *grumbles*
Bulma: *hisses* DO IT! ][
Trunks: Fine! T_T
Vegeta: THEY'RE WASTING GOOD BEER! O_o BUT WHY!? *Wails*
Erika: Mom, is dad hung over again?
Bulma: No dear. I'm pretty sure the alcohol's still in effect. *Sweatdrop*
Erika: Ah U_U *nods wisely, as if it happens ever day, which it most likely does*
Pan: *emerges from the bathroom holding Panti by the wrist* Trunkie, where are you going?
Trunks: *shoves 20 bucks in his coat pocket and angrily stomps out the door*
Bulma: Jesus Christ, Someone's PMSing. *Rolls her eyes*
Pan: Where did Trunks go.
Bunny: Don't worry dear! ^^
Bulma: Mom! O_O What are you doing here!?
Bunny: Cleaning! ^^
(Insert sound effects here as everyone falls over anime style, legs in the air)
Vegeta: *Prods Pan with a broomstick* What were you doing in the bathroom with Panti! You sicko! She's your daughter!
Pan: I wasn't doing anything! SHE was cutting herself again! u_u
Panti: Awesome you reopened the wound mom!
Erika: *to Panti* What'd you use this time?
Panti: *proudly* A nail! ^-^
Erika: Sugoy.
Bunny: *hopping around scrubbing things, ironically enough like a bunny*
Vegeta: 'ba ba bah' *plays deranged comedy sound on the symbols that appeared out of nowhere*
Bulma: Mom, I uh saw a donut stain on the couch at your place!
Bunny: Oh my good golly gosh! *Bounces out the door to carry out her obsessive compulsive nature elsewhere*
(A/N: The whole time Boxer was alive, my friends and I were trying to figure out why he was so hygienic. After a year we finally realized that he got it from bunny, the third time we were reading this. Sad and obvious.)
Vegeta: How is she related to you? - -;
Bulma: It's a curse.
Panti: *blushing wildly as she caresses her pocket knife*
Erika: Oro- I mean Sugoy!
Bulma: *glares at Erika* Tsk tsk. No Oroing in this house, Missy.
Erika: Gomen.
Vegeta: Isn't missy the name of your best friend's cat? The one you're infatuated with?
Bulma* UhNooo. *Sweatdrop*
Bra: *holds up a flashing 'liar' sign with an arrow pointing down at Bulma*
Bulma: I see that Bra-chan. I have eyes in the back of my head.
Bra: *gasps* REALLY!? *Searches through her mother's hair for an extra pair of eyes*
Bulma: IT'S AN EXPRESSION YOU BAKA!
Bra: Ohhh. I don't get it *proceeds to get drunk further*
Vegeta: My poor Corona!
Erika: That was an out of character
Bulma: Yes..WellVegeta's an out of character.
Vegeta: WHAT? Don't let the cockroaches eat your ears onna!
Bulma: ..Especially when he's drunk
Panti: *taps on Erika's shoulder and points to the pile of Budweiser and aftershock beer*
Erika: Hold on I must ask! ^^
Pant: *slaps a hand to her forehead* Baka.
Erika: Mom, can I get wasted?
Bulma: Huh Oh sure honey
Erika: Sweeeeeeeeeeet.
Panti: *slaps Erika a high five*
(Erika and Panti grab the booze and pissbolt into Erika's room)
Bulma: *sighs*
Vegeta: *Is mourning over the spilt alcohol*
Trunks: *comes back with a turkey*
Pan: *She emerges from the couch and hugs her husband*
Bulma: Thank you Trunks!
Trunks: Whatever.
(Pan and Trunks go to watch TV in the guest room. I think we all know what that REALLY means. ^_~)
Bra: Hey look mom!
Bulma: *shoves the turkey in the microwave for 20 minutes and does not acknowledge her daughter*
Bra: Look! I'm wearing black! Aren't you proud of me! ^^
Bulma: *looks at Bra's skimpy, see through black top and grimaces when she sees her short leather shorts*
Bulma: Somehow I'm not flattered
Bra: Oh well. *Bra pops percocet until she passes out in a high sensation*
(A/N: Percocet is a painkiller that makes you feel high if you take enough. How do I know? I just know.)
Bulma: We need family counseling. *She takes an aspirin*
Vegeta: *shivers at the mention of a councilor*
Bulma: Uh oh.. These aren't aspirin.. O_O;;;;;;;
Vegeta: You took viagra again didn't you?
(A/N: To all the stupid anti perverts out there, you're no fun at all. :p Well in case you didn't know, viagra makes you horny. Jeez, is pill-usage the moral to this story? *puts a finger to her mouth and talks like fat ******* from Austin Powers* Mehbeh )
Bulma: YeahI kinda did.
Vegeta: That's not necessarily a bad thing
(Vegeta and Bulma 'mysteriously' disappear and leave the turkey to burn. Needless to say, they are the only ones that are happy on this thanksgiving without a turkey)
The end KILL
(A/N: Present day, Capsule Corp, Thanksgiving. Am I the only one who notices that this is almost the DBZ version of the Osbournes? That would explain why I listen to Ozzy when I write this. *Leaves to paint crosses on the door* Now read it or I'll bite your head off.)
Bulma: Oh ****!
Vegeta: Nani?
Bulma: The turkey! TRUNKS! Where's Bra? *Spazzing out*
Vegeta: Over there. *Points to the table where Bra is chugging Vodka* O_O
Bulma: BRA, DON'T GIVE ERIKA THAT!
Bra: *drooling* haha! Too late!
Vegeta: Hey brat! That's my Vodka! X x
Bulma: TRUNKS!
Trunks: What now mom? Can't I even fu- sleep in peace? *Blushes slightly*
Bulma: Go buy a turkey! :p
Trunks: NANI?
Bulma: Go, just get a preheated one. The kind you put in the microwave.
Trunks: *grumbles*
Bulma: *hisses* DO IT! ][
Trunks: Fine! T_T
Vegeta: THEY'RE WASTING GOOD BEER! O_o BUT WHY!? *Wails*
Erika: Mom, is dad hung over again?
Bulma: No dear. I'm pretty sure the alcohol's still in effect. *Sweatdrop*
Erika: Ah U_U *nods wisely, as if it happens ever day, which it most likely does*
Pan: *emerges from the bathroom holding Panti by the wrist* Trunkie, where are you going?
Trunks: *shoves 20 bucks in his coat pocket and angrily stomps out the door*
Bulma: Jesus Christ, Someone's PMSing. *Rolls her eyes*
Pan: Where did Trunks go.
Bunny: Don't worry dear! ^^
Bulma: Mom! O_O What are you doing here!?
Bunny: Cleaning! ^^
(Insert sound effects here as everyone falls over anime style, legs in the air)
Vegeta: *Prods Pan with a broomstick* What were you doing in the bathroom with Panti! You sicko! She's your daughter!
Pan: I wasn't doing anything! SHE was cutting herself again! u_u
Panti: Awesome you reopened the wound mom!
Erika: *to Panti* What'd you use this time?
Panti: *proudly* A nail! ^-^
Erika: Sugoy.
Bunny: *hopping around scrubbing things, ironically enough like a bunny*
Vegeta: 'ba ba bah' *plays deranged comedy sound on the symbols that appeared out of nowhere*
Bulma: Mom, I uh saw a donut stain on the couch at your place!
Bunny: Oh my good golly gosh! *Bounces out the door to carry out her obsessive compulsive nature elsewhere*
(A/N: The whole time Boxer was alive, my friends and I were trying to figure out why he was so hygienic. After a year we finally realized that he got it from bunny, the third time we were reading this. Sad and obvious.)
Vegeta: How is she related to you? - -;
Bulma: It's a curse.
Panti: *blushing wildly as she caresses her pocket knife*
Erika: Oro- I mean Sugoy!
Bulma: *glares at Erika* Tsk tsk. No Oroing in this house, Missy.
Erika: Gomen.
Vegeta: Isn't missy the name of your best friend's cat? The one you're infatuated with?
Bulma* UhNooo. *Sweatdrop*
Bra: *holds up a flashing 'liar' sign with an arrow pointing down at Bulma*
Bulma: I see that Bra-chan. I have eyes in the back of my head.
Bra: *gasps* REALLY!? *Searches through her mother's hair for an extra pair of eyes*
Bulma: IT'S AN EXPRESSION YOU BAKA!
Bra: Ohhh. I don't get it *proceeds to get drunk further*
Vegeta: My poor Corona!
Erika: That was an out of character
Bulma: Yes..WellVegeta's an out of character.
Vegeta: WHAT? Don't let the cockroaches eat your ears onna!
Bulma: ..Especially when he's drunk
Panti: *taps on Erika's shoulder and points to the pile of Budweiser and aftershock beer*
Erika: Hold on I must ask! ^^
Pant: *slaps a hand to her forehead* Baka.
Erika: Mom, can I get wasted?
Bulma: Huh Oh sure honey
Erika: Sweeeeeeeeeeet.
Panti: *slaps Erika a high five*
(Erika and Panti grab the booze and pissbolt into Erika's room)
Bulma: *sighs*
Vegeta: *Is mourning over the spilt alcohol*
Trunks: *comes back with a turkey*
Pan: *She emerges from the couch and hugs her husband*
Bulma: Thank you Trunks!
Trunks: Whatever.
(Pan and Trunks go to watch TV in the guest room. I think we all know what that REALLY means. ^_~)
Bra: Hey look mom!
Bulma: *shoves the turkey in the microwave for 20 minutes and does not acknowledge her daughter*
Bra: Look! I'm wearing black! Aren't you proud of me! ^^
Bulma: *looks at Bra's skimpy, see through black top and grimaces when she sees her short leather shorts*
Bulma: Somehow I'm not flattered
Bra: Oh well. *Bra pops percocet until she passes out in a high sensation*
(A/N: Percocet is a painkiller that makes you feel high if you take enough. How do I know? I just know.)
Bulma: We need family counseling. *She takes an aspirin*
Vegeta: *shivers at the mention of a councilor*
Bulma: Uh oh.. These aren't aspirin.. O_O;;;;;;;
Vegeta: You took viagra again didn't you?
(A/N: To all the stupid anti perverts out there, you're no fun at all. :p Well in case you didn't know, viagra makes you horny. Jeez, is pill-usage the moral to this story? *puts a finger to her mouth and talks like fat ******* from Austin Powers* Mehbeh )
Bulma: YeahI kinda did.
Vegeta: That's not necessarily a bad thing
(Vegeta and Bulma 'mysteriously' disappear and leave the turkey to burn. Needless to say, they are the only ones that are happy on this thanksgiving without a turkey)
The end KILL