Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Changing Seasons ❯ Forgiveness ( Chapter 17 )

He was to be arriving home today, she thought, for the thousand-some times since she awoke from her fitful sleep in a bed that just felt too empty, He and Neko both. She stood at the window, watching the autumn leaves flutter like dead butterflies towards the ground, covering everything in a crisp orange-red banket.

She pulled the ends of the dark red housecoat tighter about her narrow waist and felt her stomach growling. She hadn't been able to eat anything all day. Thoughts of fear, guilt and shame and yes…love…outweighed the need for nourishment. She ignored her stomach and stood silently, waiting, watching. Uncertain of what she was going to tell him when he returned.

Damn Gohan for being so noble! She thought, but, after a heartbeat realized that she was glad he had confessed, the she would have done the same, was still going to the same. She knew she could not keep this from Piccolo, nor could she lie to him. She loved him too much, still. She only prayed he still felt the same about her. Even after what she had done…

Neko and Piccolo left the docking bay and decided to just fly straight home. Piccolo kept his pace even with his daughter's and allowed her to keep up. She still wasn't as strong or fast as he. The flew on in silence for awhile, Neko looking down at the houses and streets that seemed like parts from a child's model-kit. Finally, when they were halfway there, Neko could tell by the trees becoming closer together so that they grew in great clumps instead of sporidically and the houses and roads became less and less, Piccolo cleared his throat and she looked over at him, waiting.

"Neko," He said, "I'm sorry you didn't get to fight Queen Larajin…"

She shook her head, for some reason, upon the light of finding out who she really was and that her mother cheated on the only person she knew as a father, besting the Queen of Jalamir in a fight didn't seem all that important. She wondered where she'd been all her life and that if it was true that she was as shallow as she felt. There's more to life than fighting and vengence, Neko. She said to herself, aloud, she said; "Another day, Father."

He nodded and they continued on in silence. Piccolo watched the girl, no, she was too grown-up now to be called a girl, he looked at the woman he had raised as his own and felt more than a little prideful at how she turned out. He realized that he wouldn't even be feeling this, wouldn't even be flying her with her if it hadn't been for Alaura. He gritted his teeth, not wanting to think about her, wanting to forget she ever exsisted.

But he could not. He saw her every time he looked at Neko. Oh, Neko did not look a thing like her mother, but it was little things, things only a parent would notice about their children, that he saw, that reminded him. He also knew, even though he was dreading the confrontation ahead, that Alaura would never leave his heart, no matter what betrayal she committed against him. He wondered at that. Maybe it was true what they said; Love is blind. It's obviously stupid, as well, the silent namek thought as they came upon their house and began to lower themselves to the ground.

Piccolo saw felt her before he saw her. She was standing in the livingroom window, dressed for bed, or perhaps she'd never bothered to get dressed that day, her hair hanging down in waves across her back and shoulders. He had almost forgotten how much he loved the sight of her hair, that seemed infused with sunlight in it's golden tresses. He felt a sudden urge to run his fingers through it, before stopping that train of thought and reminding himself that he was still angry with her.

"Mom waited for us." Neko said, also seeing her mother in the window, "I'll go...explore the forest for a bit." She realized that Piccolo and her mother needed some time alone, with each other, without any distractions. Without waiting for an aknowlegement, she flew off through the trees. Piccolo had heard her words and felt her leave, but did not take his eyes from the woman in the window.

He stood there, not bothering to come inside, arms folded across his massive chest, willing her to come to him. Sighing, Alaura moved away from the window and shadows fell where her image had been only moments before. He heard the door open and she stepped outside in bare feet, her blue eyes fearful and darting.

He would have none of that. He stepped up to her, looked down into her face and held her chin between thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look into his eyes. At last he spoke, it wasn't what she'd expected; "You've hurt me, woman."

She felt tears behind her eyes as he continued to hold her face still, uptilted towards his own green one. "You've betrayed me. How could you do this, Alaura?"

"I..I.." She stumbled over her words, unable to find a reason, a viable one at least, "I was just stupid, Piccolo."

He nodded, not bothering to coddle her. She had been stupid as far as he was concerned, why tell her something that wasn't true. He watched the tears slide down her cheeks and shook his head, he wasn't going to be allow her tears to sway him. No. He would not.

"I thought I asked you a question, woman." He said, putting emphasis on the word `woman' as though he had just taken a bite out of something rotten and did not like the taste in his mouth. He waited with the paitence of the gods as she continued to cry and try to speak, only to start weeping once more.

"I don't know why!" She cried finally, jerking her head from his grasp and turning away, "It just happened! I'm sorry and I wish with all my heart that it never had, Piccolo!"

"Alaura…" He started, but she was all ready off on her own emotional playground, unable to hear him. She went on, through her tears and hiccups; "I know I hurt you, and I'm sorry for that! I never meant to…I swear this is true! I…"

"Alaura…"

"But, I can't change the past, Piccolo and I'm only a `woman' as you said…I make mistakes…bad mistakes sometimes…but I still love you, Piccolo…if you say you hate me and never want to see me again…I…I won't be able to stop you from leaving…"

"Alaura, stop!" Piccolo cried, grabbing her shoulders and spinning her around to face him again, "Look at me. Stop…stop crying. Please…"

"Don't ask me to stop loving you…" She hiccupped, looking down, "I won't be able to keep a promise like that."

"I'm not asking you to do anything, Alaura." He titled her chin upwards once more, to look into her bloodshot eyes. She'd been crying a lot, he thought, feeling that he should be punishing her more, but his heart just wasn't in it, anymore. All those long hours during the journey home had served him well as he was left with nothing else to do but think. "I can't forgive you…" She started to turn away, but he held her in place, went on; "But I still love you. I feel like a fool for saying this…but, I don't think I can ever not love you, Alaura."

"A-are you saying…what I think your saying?" She asked, still fearful that he was going to start to yell or worse yes, hit her! Even though he'd never raised his hand in anger to her before…but then, she'd never cheated on him with his best friend before! "Piccolo?"

"I'll be keeping a better eye on you from now on." He said, finally, "I don't trust you."

"You have every reason to be distrustful…" She started, but he ceased her from finishing her sentence by leaning down to capture her mouth beneath his own. "O-of…me…"

"Even though I love you, Alaura," He said, before kissing her again, also leaving her gasping, "You will have to repair my trust in you."

She nodded, knowing that she would never, as long as she lived, ever make the same mistake twice. She had tasted forbidden fruit and frankly…she thought that term was overrated. "Let's begin by allowing me to greet you properly." She said, tugging him towards the house. She hadn't realized how much she had missed him until she was within his strong arms, feeling herself fit perfectly against him, breathing with him. She was thankful that he still loved her. Even if she still did not feel as if she deseved that love.

But, she would try to make it up to him. She would try to win back his trust if it was the last thing she ever did. Alaura thought this as she pulled him downwards towards her, feeling his heart pound against her own upon the bed.

The feeling lasted for all of three minutes. Alaura shook her head and shoved him away, seconds before she began to dry heave over the bed. She hadn't eaten anything all day, so there was nothing to come up but bile. She gasped and ran to the bathroom, this time, last night's dinner, half-digested, came up. She sat on the floor, her sweating head resting on the cold toliet seat, breathing deeply.

"Oh, crap…" She said, under her breath, mentally counting the days since she'd been with Gohan and realizing that more than a few weeks had passed, "No…"