Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Dude Looks Like A Lady ❯ Chapter Three ( Chapter 3 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Innocence Is Futile

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Dude Looks Like A Lady
By Raven Pan and Alison Sky

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CHAPTER THREE
April 6
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It was mid afternoon, and Gohan was flying home from his job. As always, he flew over the apartment that his brother and Trunks were living in. Looking at his watch and seeing that it was still early enough, he dipped down to land on the balcony and knocked, figuring he could get a quick visit in. "Hello, anyone home?' he called.

Trunks was sulking, playing a video game, "It's open!" she called, in enough of a mood that she forgot her... change in appearance.

Gohan's ears perked and he pushed it open, looking over the couch, seeing the lavander hair. "Hey Trunks, you getting sick, I could have..." he walked around the couch and saw the female form and stopped. "Oh, sorry Miss... I thought..." he rubbed the back of his neck, blushing.

"Huh?" She pushed a button a few times, "That's not fuckin possible, who the hell made this up, I can't believe... what the FUCK!!??!" she growled and threw down the controller," she looked up. "Oh, it's you," she crossed her arms and sulked. She was wearing a pair of Trunks's old jeans, belted since they were too big on her, and an oversized t-shirt that made her bra-less state a bit obvious.

Gohan just facepalmed. That was Trunks... but... "How the hell...?" he asked, blinking.

"I have a key," she rolled her eyes, deciding to pretend she was one of her own girlfriends.

Gohan reached out with his ki to confirm what he wanted to feel, but it was wierd... half right, half VERY wrong. "You should... you live here," he tested.

"Not really," she lied smoothely, raising one lavender eyebrow.

"I can sense your ki, Trunks," Gohan chuckled. "And the eyebrow raise and stance are perfect give aways of your parents."

"Fuck you," she flopped onto the couch. "What do you want, Pansy?" she muttered. "Come to stare at the carnival sideshow that's become my fucking life?" she bit out. "Go ahead and laugh, poke fun, everyone else has."

"Now that you've confirmed it, may I ask how the hell this happened?"

"Fucking woman using the fucking dragonballs to fuck up my life, that's what."

Gohan just raised an eyebrow, and at more than just Trunks' language. "Someone wished you into being a girl? Do you know why?"

Trunks just shrugged.

Gohan sat on the chair, just staring. "Did you even bother to find out why?"

"To do that, I'd have to find the bitch who did this," She rolled her eyes.

"You don't even know WHO did it?" Gohan's jaw dropped. "You don't know anyone who has something against you that would make them do THIS?!"

"Gohan, use your brain - that could very well describe every woman I've dated since I was sixteen," she said dryly. "That's nearly half my lifetime, what do you think."

"You really need to stop sleeping around, Chibi." Gohan sighed.

"Well OBVIOUSLY this is putting a cramp in things," She frowned. "I gotta wait a year and then I can be wished back." She grumped and pulled the pillow around to hug on, resting her chin on the top. "That's not the worst of it... I'm not just female... I'm a HUMAN female... and not a fighter like your Videl, but a weak little... gah, I could just kill myself."

"Well, I wouldn't do that just yet. I'm sure we can figure out a solution," Gohan leaned forward, his thinking face on.

"At least you don't find this hilarious," she muttered in satisfaction.

"No, it's serious. You're getting yourself into a lot of trouble this way... I mean, your family knows, I take it?"

"Well at least YOU'RE on my side, everyone else thinks it's a lark, I think Dad's in denial, and Mom and Bra think it's the funniest thing since Hercule slipped off the stage three years ago."

"You say the wish was made on the Dragonballs... we could go to Namek and find the ... oh wait, Guru died..." Gohan sighed and took a deep breath, thinking.

"They'll only believe I went on some kind of mercy mission for so long, Gohan.... It could really hurt the numbers for Capsule Corp."

"Capsule Corp you can deal with... Your Mom will feed them a line to keep them at bay... perhaps you can create an identity... a cousin or something, and let Bulma elect you to fill the spot and learn the ropes in 'Trunks' absense..." Gohan theorised.

"Trina's the first name that came to mind when I had to cancel my merger dinner," Trunks told him. "What other lot of trouble could there be?"

"Well... women things... plus.... well, You've always been a very loud and brash person, Trunks... but you're obviously not as strong as you used to be... you can get into a lot of trouble if you don't control yourself."

"So I'll stay in the apartment the whole time, Chibi already said he'd run all the errands and shit."

"You think you can survive a year in here?" Gohan raised an eyebrow.

Trunks shrugged.

"You'll have to leave eventually, Trunks."

"Well, I guess."

"What then?"

Trunks put on an american accent, "Hello, I'm Trina Briefs, Trunks's cousin from Chicago."

"Your accent needs work," Gohan chuckled.

Trunks shrugged, "I'll rent 'Some Like It Hot'."

Gohan just sighed. He was getting one of those headaches again.

"Gohan. You're brilliant. Fix this. I'd ask Mom, but I don't think she'll stop laughing long enough to even try."

"Well... the problem is that it's from the Dragon. We can't really reverse these things without making a new wish." Gohan thought. "Did you ask Dende if there was anything he could do?"

"Yes. I'm doomed," Trunks groaned, slouching on the couch and putting the pillow over her face.

"Well, it's only a year... it's not like you're going to be stuck like that forever..."

"Thank Kami." Trunks groaned. "I don't think I can last a year, though."

"Just don't get pregnant," Gohan stated, chuckling softly.

"Hell no, first guy who tries to touch me, I'm going to tear off his fucking balls," Trunks shuddered in distaste. "Ugh! That's just... Ugh, I'm not GAY Gohan!"

"I know... but in that body, being gay has nothing to do with what your hormones are going to be telling you."

"I refuse to have hormones," Trunks picked the pillow off her face and glared at him.

"That's not an option, I'm afraid."

"C'mon, there's gotta be some sort of de-horemonisationing therapy thing out there, right?"

"If you want to become a wrestler, maybe?" Gohan sighed.

"So... what about cryo-stasis? You know that tank Mom built from using the information on one of those scouters... maybe I could hang out in that for a year....

"And Capsule Corp?"

"Uhm... Bra? Wait, no bad idea," Trunks sighed.

"I think you're stuck... Trina."

"I don't suppose you'll be willing to kill me so we can just use the dragonballs to wish me back and normal all at once?"

"You'd be dead a long time... and I'd join you once your father finds out."

"Actually, in this instance...I don't think he'd mind," Trunks laughed. "Not like he'd notice I was gone, anyhow."

"No, he'd still kill me." Gohan nodded.

"They could wish us both ba... wait, then Goku'd kill him.... This is totally screwed up."

"That's the first good statement you've come up with yet, Trunks," Gohan sighed.

"What, that this is screwed up? I figured that was a given."

"Yeah, it is." Gohan looked around. "Did Goten move out to give you space then?"

"No, he's at work," she sighed.

"Well... tell him I stopped by." He stood up and placed a hand on Trunks' shoulder. "We'll figure something out, Trunks... just give me time, ok?"

"Sure," she nodded, smiling slightly. "Thanks for not thinking it's all the joke of the century, Gohan."

"No problem, kiddo... you just sit tight, and we'll get you back to normal as soon as possible."

"Yeah, soon as possible, I'll let Chibi know you came by."

"Thanks. Take care." With that, he went to the balcony and flew off.

She grumbled and went back to her video game.

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Trunks paced around the room. "Dragonballs... FUCKING Dragonballs!!!"

"Who would hate you so much to do this to you?" Goten asked, sitting in the livingroom chair, watching Trunks pace.

"I don't know! For all I know, it could be any ONE of the seven hundred twenty some-odd women I've dumped in the last fourteen years!" she threw her hands up in the air.

"Well... how about this... who had the abiltity to gather them? I mean, our families are really the only ones who know they exist..."

"I don't know! I mean... well... I had them hidden..." she rubbed at the back of her neck.

"All of them?"

"Uhm.... yeah," she frowned and sat down. "I'm trying to remember where I put them - I figured it'd be better to know where they were, in case they were needed."

"I guess they weren't secure then..." he chuckled, smirking as he gave her a good look over.

"Bite me," She wrinkled her nose. "I mean... uagh!" she lay back on the floor, one hand over her stomach, the other arm over her eyes. "Where'd I put them," she grumbled to herself.

"Well, they weren't here... did you leave them at your parents? Maybe a sick joke of your sister's?"

"Nope, remember, she was just as shocked. Hm...." She thought a moment. "Oh that's right, I left them in the back of the storeroom, practically buried under other stuff - probably had an inch of dust over the box."

"Ok... you left seven dragonballs... unguarded... in your office where you have slept with half your staff.... You were asking for punishment, man."

"How could anyone have even known what they WERE - besides, they were in the back, who'd be stupid enough to even go that far into the sto...re... room.... FUCK!" she sat straight up.

Goten bit back his first response. "What?" he asked instead.

"It HAD to be Leiko!"

"Who?"

"Leiko, production manager - broke up with her that day."

"Because...."

Trunks shrugged, "I was starting to care about her."

Goten just sighed. "And you dumped her BECAUSE of that?! Trunks, that's when you move to the next step FORWARD!"

"Hell no!" She shook her head adamantly, crossing her arms and scowling. "I NEVER go to the next level, REMEMBER?!"

"So you broke her heart... and let me guess... you fired her too like the last girl." Goten crossed his arms.

"The last shipment was three days late, and it's the fourth time she's done that. I had to - it's bad business to keep a slacker on." Trunks shrugged, nonplussed.

Goten shook his head. "Trunks... I'm your best friend, don't get me wrong. I hate to say it... but you deserved this."

Trunks rolled her eyes, "You're such a fucken softie, Chibi."

"And you've really become a jerk, Trunks." Goten stated. "You closed yourself off from anything emotional, that I wonder if you're not just one big walking dick."

Trunks shrugged, not really worried about that, "I don't have one anymore, remember?" she shot back, going toward the kitchen for something to eat.

"I can get you one at the sex shop!" Goten shouted with a smirk on his face.

Trunks just laughed goodnaturedly, "You do that, Chibi - and people'll wonder about you!"

"I can just say I'm buying it for you..."

A riceball flew out from the kitchen, heading toward his face.

Goten, a true Son, just caught it with his mouth and started to eat it.

Trunks peeked out from the room, "Just forget it, Chibi. We'll find those fuckin dragonballs when the year's up. Hm... I wonder if I can sue her for emasculation?" She leaned against the doorjamb.

"Oh yeah. 'Your Honor... I'm suing because she made a wish on mythical dragonballs and turned me into a female. No sir... yes, I did say Dragonballs sir... sir, why are you laughing?'," Goten smirked.

"I could use DNA testing to prove my identity."

"It wouldn't match... Saiyan versus human..."

"Fuck."

"Now?"

"Wha?!" Trunks blinked. "EEW!"

Goten's laughter echoed through the house.

"You, my friend, are a fucking pervert! UAGH!" Trunks threw her hands in the air. "I am SO locking my door!"

"Yeah, until the day you're so horny you crawl into my bed and seduce me like you do all those other women," Goten chuckled.

"EEEEWWWWW!!!!!!!!!" she shuddered visably, waving her hands in front of her. A very, VERY feminine motion.

Goten fell to the floor laughing.

"Guah!" She threw a pan at him and stalked to her room, slamming the door and locking it.

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