Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Gott Wieb Ich Will Kein Engel Sein ❯ Damned to the Fortress of Solitude ( Chapter 1 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

These words they echo through my head, “Gohan you can defeat anyone when your angry”. You shut the hell up. You get angry, you save the world. You just leave me out of it. I didn’t want this. What kind of father were you? What man could tell his child to get angry?
Stay dead you bastard!
Gohan muttered under his breathe as he lay on his bed. His jaw shivered with anger and fear. He was actually scared of his father being wished back to life. He was a greedy bastard that would do anything to save the earth, Gohan was sure if he had the choice he would’ve sacrificed him too.
“Gohan get off your lazy ass!” Chichi yelled from downstairs. She had been less than kind in his father’s absence. She spent at least three weeks after he died crying. Crying, and ignoring him. Gohan soon found out it was because she was pregnant. His father’s death had forced him to grow up earlier than any boy wants too. After Goten was born, Chichi spend her days smothering him with love. Literally.

“Mother I’m home...” Gohan yelped as he entered the small door of their house. His mother had sent him out to go kill something for dinner. He had always frowned when she told him to do that. She let those words fly so easily from her mouth. ‘Go Kill something Gohan’ Normal boys get scolded for killing things. He was encouraged to kill. Kill Cell, save the world, defeat anyone evil. If he were to kill everyone evil, this world would be nothing.
Gohan heard nothing and began to worry. He looked in the living room, the kitchen and even the bathroom. No one was there. Gohan’s sensitive ears picked up the sounds of crying in his mother’s bedroom. Gohan tensed as he walked into the bed room. He wasn’t good with this sensitivity thing, but he had been told by Bulma that he would have to learn to be. Gohan jumped and ran quickly into the room. His mother was laying face down on her bed. There was a small lump under her chest.
“Mother!” Gohan yelled out in his squeaky pubescent voice. He rolled his mother’s limp body off of his baby brother’s head. Goten, now free from his mother’s bosom screamed and cried. Chichi woke up and saw Gohan hugging his baby brother close.
“What are you doing?” Chichi screamed as she sat up unsteadily. “Your hurting him! Put my baby down!” Chichi jumped up and snatched the child from Gohan. Gohan reached out for his little brother, but his mother turned around and slapped him.

That had been a traumatizing experience for him especially during puberty. He later found out from Bulma That his mother had been heavily medicated for post partdom depression. Mixed with the liquor she had drank earlier that day it had made her act out. Gohan never left the house for more than five minutes after that day.
Chichi knocked heavily on the door. Gohan jumped and stuffed his metal pipe and his bag of hash into his pocket.
“Yeah! I’m coming!” Gohan yelled through the door. He got up with his wobbly legs. Gohan had been smoking weed for some amount of time now. Lately no matter how much he smoked it wouldn’t help his depression. Gohan turned on his room fan and watched the smoke whirl into it and out the vents outside his window.
Gohan trudged down the stairs with heavy feet. His eyes were bloodshot and weighed down with his inner problems. Bo matter how much energy the weed gave him Gohan still always was tired, and pained by past memories. The black that had once engulfed his eyes had now faded to a dark rich gray.
“Goten your going to see your daddy today!” Chichi said with an almost frightenly happy smile on her face. Gohan looked down at his little brother, he looked so much like his father sometimes he wanted to splatter his head on a wall. Gohan was always reminded of that time where he had saved him. That and mild brotherly love did he stop himself from crushing his skull. Chichi shifted her attention up to Gohan.
“Gohan you lazy ass go upstair and make yourself presentable! People will say things if you don’t!” Gohan obediently turned on a heel with the same blank stare on his face and walked back upstairs. Gohan had always told himself that she used up all her love on Goten and had none left for him. It gave him strange comfort. What his mother didn’t know was that people already talked, Gohan had heard people he didn’t even know mutter things. Things about her alcohol abuse, things about his drug abuse, things about her being a harlot, and things about him being a lowlife. Gohan reached the top of the stairs, rubbed his eyes, spiked his hair, and went back down. His mother glared at him, but said nothing. They all left and headed towards Kami’s Lookout. Gohan refused to sit on that cloud with them so he flew. It gave him time to stew in his own anger.

As he landed on the lookout, everyone turned to look at them. He saw some people whisper to each other, but paid no attention to it. He glared straight ahead and focus on the sound clacking of his heels on the tile. All of his father’s friends were there. Tien, Yamcha, Roshi, Oolong. All of those jobless lowlifes who focus on fighting for a living. Dende left to go get the Dragonballs with Mr. Popo leaving everyone to chat. Gohan stepped backwards from his mother and the small crowd and shoved his hands in his pockets. He fingered his pipe without the realization that someone was talking to him.

“Hey....” Gohan looked up and saw Vegeta with the same scowl that was always crunched onto his face. Gohan remained silent as Vegeta guided his eyes down with his own.
“Your on my foot.” Vegeta scoffed. Gohan looked down. He was indeed standing on the tip of his Saiyan boot.
“Oh, sorry.” Gohan muttered through the side of his mouth as he stepped off of the man’s boot. Gohan and Vegeta remained quiet between each other, neither one really wanting to talk.
“We haven’t had any calls from your house for awhile.” Vegeta said, trying to make conversation opposed to standing in an awkward silence. He felt something odd about Gohan’s aura. It was fuzzy, unclear and angry. He had felt it like this before, and up til now he had just thought it was just the drugs he had been taking in secrecy from his mother. He had never felt it so intense, so unstable.
“Is that really a big problem. You should be glad, it’s not disturbing you and your precious training.” Gohan snapped at him without even looking his direction. Dende had came back out with the Dragonballs under his arm. Gohan now scowled more than ever. He felt his heart rate increase with rage, and his hands shook in his pockets with fear.

Vegeta was taken back by this outburst, no one had ever talken that way to him. Except his father, but no one so young had ever dared to take a notch out of his belt. This made him remember a time where he had been humiliated and almost frightened by this boy.

Vegeta stood in his Gravity room with his muscles clenched, every bone in his body was pressured to the brink with the pressure his massive muscles put on them. Vegeta screamed in his Super Saiyan form as he pushed his anger and his determination forward. He prodded it with all his disgracing memories, all the times he had been humiliated by the unworthy. Frieza, Broly, His own father, Cell, and of course Goku. All of them fueling his power. Vegeta collapsed on the ground. His muscles finally unable to hold himself up. Vegeta looked down at his arm, dark red was spreading through small spots in his skin.
“Another blood vessel? Dammit!” Vegeta scowled at his arm as he flexed it. He stopped and his head shot up, something strange was coming.
“That is...Gohan?” Vegeta growled as he heard something slam against the door. Gohan ripped the door open, nearly taking it off of its hinges. Tears were streaming down his face and he looked quite dirty. His aura was once again unclear. This was one of the first times Vegeta experienced Gohan with this aura about him.
“Beat me!” Gohan said sniffing up the mucus that had leaked from his nose and wiping the tears from his eyes.
“Beat you?” Vegeta laughed. He was quite interested in his proposal, but he did wonder what would bring him to this. Gohan glared at the man laughing at him. He shut the door and flew at Vegeta. Gohan hit him with his small fist straight in the jaw. Blood leaked out of Vegeta’s less than amused face.
“If this is the way you want to die!” Vegeta growled as he elbowed Gohan across the head and sent him flying into the air with an uppercut to the jaw. Gohan got up and encouraged Vegeta to hit him harder.
“No wonder my dad beat you! Your weak!” Vegeta kicked him in the chest and sent him flying back against a wall as if he were a rag doll. Vegeta kept up the punishment. He hit him so hard that he could see the dent in the wall molding to Gohan’s body.
Vegeta thrust his elbow right between Gohan’s eyes. He heard something crack, and finally the taunts stopped. Vegeta stepped back as his body fell from the dented wall and onto the floor. He cringed in fear. If he had really killed him than Bulma would kill him. Gohan’s body moved and he got up. Vegeta looked down at him and laughed. Laughed in relief. Gohan looked up at him. Both of his eyes were bright red as blood seeped into them from the broken blood vessels. Gohan glared at him. He had an odd look on his face, it was like he was looking at him, but seeing someone else. Gohan’s aura exploded in the room. It flung Vegeta against the opposite wall. He had automatically went to Super Saiyan 2. Gohan and his long spiky hair looked at Vegeta. Gohan placed his hand onto his neck and lifted him up. Vegeta felt his hand getting hot, really hot. That kind of blast could take his head off. Vegeta took his fist and rammed it into the teens neck. Gohan dropped him and fell to the floor coughing up blood. Gohan powered down and fell unconscious. Vegeta stared at the dark red, almost black puddle spewing from his mouth. He picked up his limp body and held it up to his face.
“What’s wrong with you kid?”

Gohan had a broken trachea and was unconscious in the hospital for awhile. Even the Senzu Beans weren’t much help to him. It was like he refused to come out of that state. Vegeta found out later that Gohan had just had another fight with his mother over that damn little baby.

Gohan zoned out after that spat, but was quickly brought back to reality by the clinking of the Dragonballs onto the ground. This was it. They called forth the dragon, he granted thier wish. In a hazy purple mist Goku poofed before them. He stood there in all of his former glory. His muscles seemed larger, almost as if they were ready to rip through his shirt. Some cheered, some gasped, some even cried, Gohan however stood quiet. He glared as Chichi ran forward and wrapped her arms around his large neck. She nudged forward his younger son. Gohan scowled as that same stupid smile that he had remembered happily from his childhood rose to his face. Goku’s eyes finally met his.
“Gohan! Hey, come here!” Goku said happily waving over to his eldest son. Gohan shuffled forward reluctantly. “There’s my boy!” Goku slung his arm around Gohan’s shoulder. Gohan grimaced as his vieny arm wrapped around his neck and gave him a noogie. Gohan threw him off.
“I’m not in the mood!” He yelled at Goku. His father seemed somewhat hurt my his tone. Gohan flew off from Kami’s Lookout and headed from his home. It was hours before they came home. In that time Gohan had managed to clean the refrigerator of food and drink a half of bottle of Everclear from the cabinet. Chichi and Goku stumbled int though the door laughing. Goten followed behind them with a sort of confused smile on his face.
“Gohan!” Chichi said happily. Her face was red and her eyes were bloodshot. Gohan could tell she had been drinking. “Could you take Goten out somewhere for the rest of the night? We need to do ‘things’.” Chichi said rubbing her hands all over Goku’s chest. He looked to his father. He looked sober, but he was always drunk in his own way. Perhaps it was just that he had the mind of a 7 year old. Perhaps that’s why he acted like that. Sometimes Gohan wondered if Goku would’ve turned out more like Vegeta if he hadn’t suffered major brain damage. Gohan nodded his head and grabbed Goten’s small hand. He walked outside and looked around. It was warm out, he figure thy would just go sleep in a field or something. Gohan picked his brother up and flew out into a field nearby.
“Gohan, Why did they kick us out?” Goten asked quietly as his brother sat silently next to him.
“Because life’s a real bitch.” Gohan answered bluntly. Every time Goten would ask a question like that in his raspy voice Gohan would always reply the same way. Life was a bitch. There’s no way around it. In a happier time some one had one told him ‘Being Human and Having your health, That’s all you need to be happy’. He wasn’t Human, so that didn’t really apply to him. Goten fell asleep next to him and before he knew it the sun had risen. Gohan sat and sat until it was about noon. The last thing he wanted to do was walk into some unwanted scene, that would scar his memories even more. Goten finally awoke and Gohan picked him up. It was a short fly until they got home. Goku was out in the front yard doing squats with a large tree over his head. Goten ran inside, but Gohan was called over by his father.
“Hey Gohan! Join me will you?” Goku said cheerfully as if nothing was tense between them. Gohan picked up a tree and lifted it with one arm with ease.
“So what was with that outburst yesterday?” Goku asked putting on his ‘I’m-trying-to-be-a-concerned-parent-but-I’m-really-an-id iot’ face. Gohan stood silent for a moment.
“I really hate you, and I’ve been training for years getting ready to slaughter you with extreme prejudice when you came back!” Gohan said happily with a smile on his greasy face. Goku laughed as if he hadn’t heard anything he said. Gohan wasn’t sure if he had. Maybe Goku had always molded his mood to the tone in people’s voice.
“Hah! Ok that’s good to hear!” Goku laughed as he squatted. Gohan dropped the log and went inside. He smacked his palm to his forehead at his father’s own idiocy. Gohan cringed at the smell of musty sex that filled his house. He walked into the kitchen for something to eat. His mother turned around and frowned at him.
“How could do make such a ass of yourself at the Lookout?!” Chichi yelled at him. Gohan stopped and was going to turn and leave when his mother stomped up to him.
“You embarrassed me, your father and yourself! What will people think?” Chichi yelled continuous insults at her son. He just left them sink into his flesh. Chichi finally raised her hand and slapped her son. He looked away and calmly walked upstairs.
“Fuck this, Fuck it all.” Gohan laid on his bed and fell asleep hungry.

A/n: You know everytime I get close to finishing a story I get this writers block. Oh no! I’m going to finish this damn thing! DAMN IT! It’s also difficult because I’m adding onto something that’s already written and it’s a pain in the ass. *sigh* ok...I’m not leaving this chair until I finish this....Who HA! *beats chest like donkey kong*
Gohan leapt from his bed. He had a good feeling, he hadn’t woken up this happy in at least a year. The sudden realization of who was downstairs hit him when he heard the happy laughter from the kitchen.
“Heh heh heh...You make me sick!” Gohan mocked as he walked down the hall from his room. The light of the hall was far to bright for him. He had hung a sheet over the window in his and his little brothers room to keep it dark. It matched his mood. Gohan sat at the kitchen table and glanced at everyone grimly.
“Come on Gohan smile for us! It’s a happy day!” Goku said as Chichi set a mound of food on the table. “See? Food!” Goku, Goten, and Chichi laughed as Goku guzzled down the food.
‘It would be a happy day if I were high. What the hell? I’m glad I don’t have the permanent munchies like you, fuck face.’ Gohan thought to himself with a painful smile plastered on his face. Gohan would force his fake laughter whenever his father made a joke. It made his food bitter and hard to swallow each time he had to force himself to do something.
“Oh honey it sure has been lonely without you!” Chichi wrapped her arms around Goku while he was still eating and kissed him on his cheek. His cheek was slick and greasy from the grease of the chicken he had eaten earlier. Gohan gagged like he had a hairball in his mouth and spit his food back onto his plate.
“Welp! I’m done!” Gohan said standing up quickly, shaking the table, as his parents continued to mack on each other. Gohan walked down the hall and shut himself up in his room.
“What’s his problem?” Goku asked, his voice not even faltering in it’s cheerful tone.
“Oh Gohan’s been a weenie lately...” Chichi said frowning at her eldest sons rudeness. Goku shrugged and downed his last bowl of rice.
“So Goten, how about going up to Kami’s for a spar?” Goku said wiping the grease onto a fluffy kitchen cloth. Goten nodded his head vigorously. He was eager to spend time with his daddy, who he knew very little.

Gohan sat in his room cleaning his piece. He had nothing better to do. He pushed the resin into the bowl and kept it there to smoke later. He heard the house door slam. He hoped that his family had gone out, but moments later he heard crashing in the kitchen. Gohan swore through his teeth, his hopes of having alone time dashed. Gohan suddenly became bored, that happened a lot when he wasn’t wallowing in hatred or pity. Being depressed or angry had always distracted him from needing constant entertainment. Perhaps he should go terrorize someone. Though there was little fun to be had there it was tempting to go scare someone with his ‘super duper amazing powers!’ After about an hour Gohan got up. He sensed his father somewhere with his brother. He decided it might be fun to go make fun of him, even if that retard didn’t know it. Gohan flew to the lookout and almost tripped as he landed on the freshly waxed tile. Dende and Popo probably were having hot sex there and needed the fluids cleaned away. Gohan laughed out loud, he was in that insensitive cynical mood. He would need it to think of good zingers for poking fun at his father. Gohan looked around, he saw his dad in the distance and smiled. He noticed something odd, Goku’s face was serious and he was holding something up. What was he holding?
“Go-Goten!” Goku raised his fist and sent Goten flying backwards with a punch to the stomach.
“GOTEN!” Gohan screamed out. Goku looked at him with hardened eyes. Gohan felt something snap inside of him, a burst of fire rise up from within him. The life drained from his eyes as his father approached him. He said something, but Gohan had no ears to hear any of it. Goku put his hand on Gohan shoulder and had a worried look on his face. Gohan slowly turned his head to look at it, everything blurred into slow motion. How dare he touch my shoulder with his bloodstained hand? He is a betrayer, a life shattered, he is scum. He must die. Gohan’s mouth twitched as he began to see his father’s hand dripping with the blood of all those he had hit and even killed.
Gohan felt that same burst of fire again rise up, only this time stronger. The fire exploded from his body in raw Super Saiyan power. The force threw his father away from him and caused others to lose their balance and fall. Goku looked shocked his was talking to him. Trying to calm him down. This only fueled Gohan more. Gohan saw that the floor was cracking beneath him, The more he stared down at his father the stronger he got. He heard muffled screams and vague words he couldn’t make out. All he head was their voices defending Goku. All of Goku’s friends, Always defending him. Didn’t they know he would sacrifice any one of them to save his precious earth?
Gohan reached down and picked up his father by his big meaty throat. Gohan lifted him well above his head. Goku didn’t struggle at all, he was in to much shock. Gohan didn’t care either way. He would make sure that. His father could never haunt his memory again. Gohan didn’t want to be the good guy anymore. No more defending those who can’t defend themselves. If you’re afraid of stepping on all the ants then you’ll never be able to walk.
“Your right father, I can defeat anyone when I am angry.” Gohan said blankly, Gohan felt his hand getting hotter and hotter as he charged a Ki blast. Gohan felt the heat explode among his fingers. Gohan let out a shrill almost girlish scream. The force of the explosion forced him to let go of Goku’s neck, or it burned up in the blast. Gohan glared down at the ground witch was splattered with blood. His father’s severed head lay several feet away from his body. Bits and pieces of severed and singed flesh strung off of his neck and torso.
“You will never come back! Nor will you have an after life! I’ll erase you father!” Gohan shouted in his husky voice. He placed his hand onto his torso and felt a familiar heat on his abdomen. Gohan released it and blew his guts onto the back of one of the white marble walls of Kami’s Lookout. He wanted go kill his father in Otherworld. To erase him for all.
Goten ran over to his brother who was breathing in harsh jerking breaths as he groped his stomach.
“Brother! What did you do! We were just sparring!” Goten roughly shook his big brother. Gohan looked up at Goten. “Brother...” Goten began to sob. “I’ll pray you go to heaven!” Goten sobbed into his shirt, getting his face all bloody.
“God damn it Goten....” Gohan muttered as tears spilled from his dull eyes. “I don’t want to be an angel....”Gohan seized, and rolled away from his brother. He curled up into a ball and died with all his pride intact, and all of his tasks completed. Goten shook his brother’s body and rolled him over. He had a weak smile on his face.

Fin~