Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ He Means Business ❯ 03 ( Chapter 3 )

"Well, I think your magical dragon is just fucking with you," Raditsu shrugged, lugging a few bags of the goods that Bulma had requested—which Vegeta, of all people, had paid for—out to the vehicle the prince seemed to have brought for the purpose of transporting these items. "I mean, to start with, I don't know a damn thing about this mudball. How does he get off thinking I could do something like that? He's gotta be pulling your tail."

 

Vegeta shook his head. "I wouldn't put it past him."

 

"I'm not complaining, of course," Raditsu added, still a little concerned that Vegeta might do off with him for fun. He'd heard about what had happened to Nappa. "But even if that is why I'm alive again, what am I supposed to do, exactly?"

 

Climbing into the car, Vegeta raised one shoulder nonchalantly and smirked a bit. "I think that's up to you to figure out."

 

"Hey, wanna be my right-hand man?" Raditsu suggested, and grinned, liking the sound of it. Vegeta—Vegeta—working under him.

 

Vegeta snorted. "Tch. No thanks. I've no interest in such things. Besides, Bulma will finally be in a good mood again..." his eyes narrowed and one corner of his mouth raised at the thought. "To betray her by siding with you would be...counterproductive."

 

"'Bulma,' eh?" Raditsu elbowed him, and Vegeta pulled away, frowning, "You talk like you found something good in this scummy place."

 

"You'll see," he maneuvered out of the parking lot, and Raditsu watched carefully as he operated the machine. "Gods, why was it you?" he mused.

 

"Could've been worse," Raditsu fiddled with one of the knobs, and noise blared out of some holes on the sides of the vehicle. He quickly turned it the other way until the vicinity was in relative silence, "Could've been Nappa."

 

Vegeta sighed. "At least he knew when to shut up."

 

"Did not."

"Shut up."

 

 

...

 

 

"Hey. Buddy. You look pretty bummed."

 

"Don't call me buddy."

 

"All right. Bardock, right? What's up? You miss Raditsu?"

 

"Shut up."

 

"I mean, you two did always play cards. Y'know, I could play cards with you, if you want."

 

"Shut up."

"I play fair and all. Hell, you already know! We played a few games the other day; you can trust me. Whaddaya say?"

 

"Shut up."

"This isn't healthy, you know. I'm sure you can find some other buddies around. I thought you were doing okay. Say! Why do you keep falling unconscious all the time, anyway? I—"

 

"Shut up."

 

"I just, well I guess what I've heard is that you see your son's future. Well, not Raditsu. You know. Kakarrot. I met him once. Man, he beat me to a pulp. He didn't kill me though; that was Vegeta, of course."

 

"Shut up."

 

"You know who I hear likes playing cards? You're not gonna believe this, buddy."

 

"Don't call me buddy."

 

"You know who it is? King Vegeta. Yeah. That's what I hear. I didn't believe it either. Say, I could go talk to him, if you want, and see if he'd play cards with you. I think he's pretty bored lately too. I mean, everybody is. It's Hell."

 

"Shut up."

 

"Hey! You could even both talk about not having your sons around and all."

 

"Shut up."

 

"You're kind of a crabby guy, you know that?"

 

"Shut—" and he buckled and fell to the ground.

 

Raditsu was tapping his foot impatiently, but where was Ka—ah, there, right beside him with berries of all shapes and sizes piled in his hand. He pointed to one and grinned at Raditsu, who shrugged and nodded, taking that one himself and looking it over carefully, and Kakarrot gobbled up everything else. Raditsu seemed to mutter as he stalked off, but Goku burst into a grin, hopping after the man. "—Groceries!" Bardock blurted, eyes popping open.

 

"You know what?" came Nappa's voice, and a wave of nausea washed over Bardock that made him wish the vision might have lasted a little longer. "I like you."

 

"Shut. Up."

 

 

...

 

 

"Thanks, Vegeta," Bulma called as the door opened, flipping to the next page in a magazine and rapping her pencil against it. She made as if to turn around and address him. "Say, what if we—" she stopped as another figure stepped into the room. "V-Vegeta? Um..."

 

"Hm," Raditsu smirked. "Say, I remember you. You were on that island when I took Kakarrot's son." He looked her over. "Not bad, considering how long it's been. Are you Bulma?"

 

"Vegeta!" the woman called. "Where the hell are you?"

 

"Finding a suitable area for the lobsters," he called from a location that sounded suspiciously close to the gravity room. He followed up with, "What are you whining about? I even put the groceries in the kitchen."

 

"This is not funny, Vegeta!" she shrunk back behind the couch, just to be safe, as Raditsu crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway. "Tell me who this guy is and why he looks just like Goku's brother! And how he knows what Goku's brother did!"

 

"Because he is Kakarrot's brother," Vegeta responded, and exited the hallway, shaking some water from his hands.

 

"Don't even put me in the same sentence as that traitor sonnuvabitch!" he growled.

 

Vegeta chuckled. "Bulma, Raditsu here was brought back to life about a week ago."

 

"Why on Earth would—" she froze. "No way. No way. Stop pulling my chain."

 

"Tail," Raditsu corrected, and she shot him a glare momentarily. "What's this bullshit about chains?"

 

"Well, I don't see any other reason he'd be back," Vegeta continued. "The current theory is that the dragon is just playing a joke on us."

 

"Maybe..." Bulma bit her lip. "I hope not." She sat up straight as an idea struck her. "Or maybe he's even more a cutthroat, stop-at-nothing jerk than you," she blew him a raspberry, "and he's had just enough contact with Earth that it works out the best."

 

"Maybe," the prince shrugged.

 

Bulma raised herself from the couch, slapping the magazine against the table resolutely and strode over to Raditsu, holding out her hand. "Well, I look forward to competing with you."

 

Raditsu stared at the hand for a few moments, gaping. He glanced up toward Vegeta with wide eyes, and the prince tilted his head in confusion for a few moments before his own eyes widened. The prince leapt forward and pulled Bulma away, stuffing her hands into her pockets. Raditsu raised his eyebrows significantly and then sighed, shrugging.

 

"It's called a handshake," Vegeta clarified to him quietly, cutting through the awkward silence. "It's for, er, personal connection with someone one has just made an agreement with. 'Sealing the deal,' as they say." Raditsu nodded, still apparently fazed. "Here," Vegeta held his own hand out. "If you're a businessman in the making, you need to learn how to do this."

 

Raditsu shrunk away, apparently disgusted. "Really?"

 

"Yes. Come now, hand out."

 

The taller man winced, looking away as he held his hand toward Vegeta, who grabbed it and shook it firmly.

 

"Just don't break their wrists," he advised, and as Raditsu continued to wince even after their contact broke, Vegeta rolled his eyes. "Oh, goddammit, Raditsu, it doesn't mean that here. Get over it. I've seen how things work around here—you're going to be shaking hands with lots of people, including," he motioned to himself, "lots of men. Businessmen such as," he snickered, "yourself." With a chortle, he added, "And not a one of them will mind it. They'll expect it."

 

Raditsu bit his lip. "Seriously?"

 

"Someone care to explain?" Bulma piped up, hands squirming in her pockets as she debated what might happen if she removed them.

 

Vegeta simply extended his hand in the same pre-handshake gesture as before, this time toward Bulma, and then twitched his fingers slightly to indicate its meaning. At Bulma's continued confusion, he twitched his fingers again—more this time—resulting in a grabbing motion. His lips pulled back to reveal a toothy smirk. "I'm surprised you've never noticed me making this gesture at you before."

 

She buried her forehead against her hand. "All right. I get it."

 

"Anything else I need to know?" Raditsu asked, apparently still disconcerted. "About these Earthling rituals."

 

Vegeta seemed to ponder this before turning to Raditsu with a twisted smirk. "You know, maybe you'll just have to find out the hard way—like I did." Bulma snickered from behind him, and he waved his hand as if to dismiss her.

 

"I don't like the sound of that."

 

"You'll be fine," Vegeta gave him a hearty pat on the back as he opened the door, effectively shoving him out and still grinning maliciously. "Better leave now or Bulma will have you sized up before you even have a chance." He leaned in closer and lowered his voice. "I mean it."

 

"What if I don't want to do this whole 'business' thing?" he challenged from the doorway. Bulma's eyes seemed to burst into flame, and he shrunk away, looking to Vegeta, who nodded sagely.

 

"You'd best be off," the prince advised, and Raditsu nodded slowly and turned away.

 

"And hurry up!" Bulma called. "Or else!"

 

Vegeta closed the door quietly, smirk lingering. This should be...entertaining.