Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ High School Love Hurts ❯ You're Not Alone ( Chapter 2 )

You're Not Alone

Krillin approached Goku from behind. "I saw what happened, man. What'd she do to you?"

"Why do you want to know? It's not like it's any of your business!"

"Why do you push people away so much? It's not going to kill you to have a couple friends. Were you the guy who…?" He obviously knew about… the incident.

"No! He was some dirt bag around thirty with some apparent form of petaphelia or whatever it's called. She was drunk."

"Oh."

"Now can you guess who I was? Huh? Get out of here!"

"This is the boy's bathroom. It's a public place!"

"I know that, idiot. I'm still telling you to get out! Personal space is enforced by the law!"

"Not when it's an entire bathroom, with a line of guys holding it just outside the door! Some of them have even resorted to the… the… potty dance!"

"Ouch, that is bad," Goku said. Krillin hoped that he had gained at least a little bit of compassion in the five minutes that they were in there, but that was apparently too much to ask as Goku finished, "Just tell them to deal with it."

"WHAT??? Are you out of your mind? They're doing the POTTY DANCE OUT THERE!"

"Do you have to be so loud? You're embarrassing me!"

"In front of all of your friends

?" Krillin asked sarcastically.

"OK, you've made your point. Will you SHUT UP NOW??"

"NO!! Open the fucking door! Am I the only one here that cares that high school boys are so desperate that they are in a plaguing outbreak of a dance FEATURED ON THE UNSPEAKABLE SHOW STARRING AN ANNOYING PURPLE DINOSAUR????!!!!"

"Yes."

"You are an evil creature, Goku. An EVIL CREATURE! WITH A COLD HEART THAT WON'T EVEN SPARE DESPERATE CHILDREN!"

"Children?"

"We heard that!" a teenager yelled from outside the boys bathroom. "OPEN THE DOOR!! We're doing the potty dance out here!"

"My god, will you ever be quiet with the potty dance thing?"

"Well, it's true," Krillin whined. "They are doing the-"

Goku smacked him upside the head before he could say the evil words.

"OW!"

"LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!" he yelled again as he threw Krillin out on his ass.

"Come on, man!" the same teenager yelled again. "Let us in!"

All was silent.

"What's your favorite kind of cookie?"

"Wha… wh… chocolate chip. Why?"

They gave him a stack of chocolate chip cookies through the air vent slits on the door. He threw them out by the doorway.

"Idiots."

"What's your favorite ice cream?"

"No."

So they broke off the air vent (and if you're thinking why didn't they go through there in the first place, they didn't fit in it, only their hands), a bowl of vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup spelling out, "No." on top.

"What the…?" He threw it out the broken air vent and it landed on the, uh, full bladdered teen in the face.

Finally, the boys came up with a plan. As the only functioning boys bathroom in the school, they had to get into that bathroom. So, they stole a couple mechanical saws from the wood shop teacher and sawed into that door like there was no tomorrow. They made a big square in it and ran into all the stalls, relieving their, uh, stressed parts.

"Now will you come out, Goku?" Krillin asked from outside of the vandalized door.

"I guess I have no choice."

In reading…

"Son Goku, it is now time to read," said the same teacher he was with for homeroom.

"No."

"AGAIN WITH THE NO!! WHAT IS IT WITH YOU AND NO!!! I'M CALLING YOUR PARENTS!!"

"So, you know God's phone number?"

"Uh, your guardian."

"He doesn't have a phone."

"I'll write a letter if I have to!"

"He's blind."

"I'll go talk to him myself then!"

"He has failing hearing and won't let anyone in the house but me. He also refuses to go to my conferences."

"GOD!! IS THERE ANY WAY TO REACH THIS MAN??"

"Only through me," Goku grinned evilly.

"ARGH!!!!"

Just to humor the man he pulled out a large reference book and pretended to read, actually listening to his headphones. He got, once again, a paper airplane to the back of the head. He picked it up and scowled at Krillin. Goku saw a picture of a pirate with an arrow pointing to him that said, "Mr. Kawasaki" (teacher's name) and, "ARGH!" He sent the airplane back to Krilln who saw a picture of him being beaten over the head with a mallet by Goku who was repeatedly telling him to shut up.

Social Studies (last period)…

"Vegeta, can you tell me what the name of the first emperor of China was?"

"Kung Pow!" he replied cheerily. Everyone laughed at him and he couldn't understand why.

"That is incorrect," the teacher said after lifting himself off the ground from a fit of laughter.

"Chosen One?" Vegeta asked.

Everyone laughed again. The teacher laughed so hard that his wig came off.

"I'm sorry, that is incorrect. Goku, can you tell us the answer. What was Chin Shi Huang Di's name?" This time the teacher was kind of irritated.

Goku just grinned and said, "Ditto."

Everyone laughed so hard that one boy with asthma had to be sent to the health room and another that wet his pants had to be removed from the classroom.

After school…

"Hey, you're really smart!" Vegeta said to Goku as they left the school building.

Goku anime fainted.

"Hey, you want to be best buds?"

"WHAT??? NO!!!! I already turned down the bald guys offer anyway."

"Aw!" Vegeta said miserably as Goku continued walking home.

The next day…

"Wake up, GOKU!!!! Time for SCHOOL!!!"

"Goddamnit, get away from me, old man! You're too loud!"

"What did you say, GOKU? I can't HEAR YOU!"

"I said SHUT UP, GRANDPA!" he yelled.

"Oh, well you go and have a NICE DAY, SONNY!"

"I wish…" he mumbled.

At school…

"DO I HAVE TO GET ON YOUR BACK ABOUT GETTING INTO CLASS EVERY DAY?? YOU DIDN'T SHOW FOR DETENTION YESTERDAY!!! THAT'S TWO DETENTION TICKETS!!!!!!" the hall monitor yelled at him again.

"Whatever." He again ripped up the detention tickets and threw them away once around the corner.

Entering homeroom he got scowls, snarls, and other forms of anger from all the boys that were in line at the boy's bathroom the day before. Like he cared.

He got a paper airplane to the back of the head, AGAIN! He picked it up, not bothering to scowl this time. He read:

"You want to be my best bud?"

He looked around to see that Vegeta had been moved into his homeroom. "Oh god!"

"No," he wrote and sent it back to Vegeta, who, in turn, let out a pitiful little, "Aw!"

At lunch…

The only available table was almost full with people.

Oh god, Goku thought. All well. He sat down and began to eat his lunch.

"Hey, aren't you the guy that… impregnated Dana?" a blonde girl whispered to him.

"NO!!! Who is saying these things?"

"Sorry. Rumors are going around about it because of yesterday."

"What? Can't you people get the picture? I am her age, she got pregnant off a drunk who was old enough to be her father."

"Oh."

"Pass it on," he said as he got up and went outside.

Outside…

"Hey, Goku," Krillin said. "Want to shoot some hoops?"

"Sure."

Vegeta came out and decided to be the announcer. "And Son shoots, he scores! Way to go for the Son team!"

Krillin got a shot. "Yes! He scored 3 points! Yahoo! Way to go for the - what's your last name, Krillin?" Krillin goes up and whispers to Vegeta. " - Monk team!"

"Your last name is Monk?" Goku asked.

"No, but it's the only thing I'll let that dumbass use!"

Goku laughed. "You got that right. He keeps asking me if I want to be his `best bud'."

This time it was Krillin's turn to laugh. "Like that would ever happen!"

"What? You think I can't have a best friend?"

"Yup."

"I can too!"

"Can't!"

"Can!"

"Can't!"

"Fine! You be my best friend, then."

"You're on."

"I thought I was your best bud!" Vegeta whined.

"No!" said Goku and Krillin simultaneously.