Never Before

Card

Warnings:

1. I don't own DBZ. (Sadly.) Otherwise I would be busy coming up with plotlines for TV that involved smut and mayhem.

2. I normally write slash. So this is het. (That's a warning because I'm not entirely sure I am as good with female parts as I am with the male ones.) HETEROSEXUAL SEX. VEGETA and BULMA having sex and getting all sweaty and dirty.

3. Yep. I think that's it. No more warnings. *sigh, sadly. *

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She tapped her fingernails against the countertop and counted the seconds endlessly while she waited for Chichi to finish bitching. Goku was home-momentarily it seemed-from training long enough to do something-Bulma intensely hoped that it was a conjugal visit because if Chichi got anymore high strung she was going to break. She liked Chichi, basically, thought she was a fierce person that was waaaay too convinced that education was the only course in life, but more often than not, she thought Chichi was alright. She was married to Goku, after all, and that had to get on your nerves.

Not nearly as much as the fact that Vegeta was AVOIDING her. After yet another rousing bout of sex, he had promptly disappeared (promptly as in he waited for her to fall asleep and then left while she wasn't looking.) Thus far her inspection of the house had not turned him up. Which was fine, she supposed, because she had another Saiyan she had to skin alive. His name was Son Goku, and he happened to know that she was pregnant before she even knew that she was going to sleep with Vegeta. Which, needless to say, did not make her a happy woman. A little warning might have been nice. And for that matter, did her and Vegeta stay together or was this just a weekend adventure that ended with a kid?

When Chichi finally stopped complaining (about what she didn't catch because it was often best just to tune out on the bitch sessions) she said: "Okay Bulma, he's going to be there in just a second and then he's COMING STRAIGHT HOME! Aren't you Goku?"

There was some mumbled response to that. Then Chichi said something in return (to her husband) and then into the phone said: "Alright, Bulma. I've got to start dinner." All pleasant. Happy. Perfectly content with her life. Poor woman. It had to be hell to be married to Goku.

She said "Thanks Chichi, I promise I'll send him straight home after he fixes this bent…thing for me." She tried to remember what the excuse was why she wanted to see Goku. Something about a bent steel beam or something. That had spawned a 'what is that Prince guy doing anyway' conversation that she had tried to avoid. Found that she had to say 'Uh-huh' and 'well he's not here right now' a lot. Hung up the phone and went outside to wait for Goku to show up.

Which he did about ten minutes later, like a puppy that realized it had been caught peeing on the carpet and was convinced that if it was just cute that nothing bad would happen to it. Oh, she was definitely going to skin him. Put her hands on her hips, glanced around the sky for a second-since she hadn't told Vegeta yet-and said: "When did you think you were going to tell me that Trunks was my son, Goku?"

He cracked a grin, scrubbed at the back of his neck nervously and laughed like a dope. Managed to keep his eyes on hers for about ten seconds before they dropped down. She rolled her eyes and waited for his response: "Uh…well… You see… He kind of told me not to say anything. Besides," he said this with a real laugh, "Would you have believed me anyway?"

"You should have told me!" she snapped.

He looked sheepish (as sheepish as a Saiyan could while their eyes were glued to your breasts) "Sorry, Bulma. But, now you know so everything is fine!" Said this like he believed it.

"No," she snapped, crossed her arms over her chest-distracted him from staring for a moment and his eyes drifted back up to her eyes, "Everything is not fine. I want to know what happens with Vegeta and I."

He looked confused. "Well, didn't Piccolo already tell you, Bulma? You were there. Vegeta dies in," he paused here to think for a few seconds, "Two years."

Oh, that was great news. As if she could forget about the date of their collective deaths looming in the distance. Wasn't that just PEACHY?! Now she was a single mom living in a post-apocalyptic world. Great!

"Hey," Goku said-pouting even though he didn't realize he was pouting, because she still had her arms covering her breasts-"Have you told Vegeta?"

"No. I just figured it out yesterday."

He seemed to be confused about why she hadn't told Vegeta yesterday if that's when she figured it out. Like twenty four whole hours was much too long to keep something a secret. (And for him, it probably was.) "Oh, well, he might be happy! Having a Super Saiyan as a son."

Right. Really happy that yet another Saiyan had surpassed him and become a Super Saiyan, and it was not just any Saiyan, but Vegeta's own half-breed son. She was so sure that was going to make him feel tons and tons better. "Oh, go home to Chichi," she snapped. Was extremely annoyed with him and his lack of knowledge about what was going to happen. Annoyed that Vegeta wasn't around here anywhere, that he was avoiding her. Annoyed that she was annoyed about it because she didn't own him, he didn't own her and that was just that.

"Alright," he said, "I hope he's a cute baby." Took off. Like this wasn't a big deal. But then, Goku already had a kid, so it wasn't a big deal to him.

She couldn't be someone's mother. She couldn't even take care of her shoe collection. There was no way she would have a clue what to do with diapers and babies and oh, a whole hurricane of things burst into her mind and she felt sick just from the weight of it.

Walked back into the house and found that LO and BEHOLD, there was Vegeta, standing stock still and staring. A strange look on his face like he was caught between astounded and rage and couldn't get the gear to shift. Oh. Kami. Damn Saiyans and their damn bad timing with their damn perfect ears.

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He blinked. Repeated the action. Blinked one more time just for emphasis. Looked at her like he was looking at her for the first time. Stared at her waist. Where his child was. His son. His Super Saiyan son. The child that he had not been there to raise, the child that had apparently grown up after he was dead.

Son.

His.

In.

Her.

He briefly wondered if it would be okay for him to hyperventilate if nobody was around to see it happen. Because, technically, if no one ever saw it, it didn't happen. Except she was there, and looking at him, and dimly he realized that she was probably talking. But the magnitude of it was overwhelming. He wanted to punch himself. Felt the need to have a little talk with his nether parts about how they were not supposed to just randomly assist in producing children without his expressed permission. Thought back fondly to his brief intention to hyperventilate. That was a good plan.

No. It wasn't. He was the fucking Prince of Saiyans. The Great Vegeta. The same Saiyan that had purged planets the universe-wide and he could handle one little baby. It was just a kid. And he wasn't going to die this time, he was prepared. Would be prepared as soon as he got the woman-should he call her that now that she was carrying his son around?-to fix the damn GR so he could go back to training. Obviously he should have never stopped training-

No. That wasn't true.

Yes, that idiot Trunks had pissed him off. (Especially the wise crack about his shirt.) But he had pissed him off because he was so powerful, because he had defeated Freiza with hardly breaking a sweat. And he had been a Saiyan without any real ability to be one because him and Kakarot were the only fucking Saiyans left! (Besides the half-breed, and why hadn't it occurred to him then that Trunks could have been his child?) But Trunks was his son, and that made a difference. That power, that had to have come from him. Which meant if Trunks had it, somewhere inside of Vegeta, he had it too. He had passed it on.

"Still alive in there?" Bulma said. Was close to him again. Very close, waving her hand in front of his eyes. Looked like he felt. Haggard. Overwhelmed.

"Of course," he snapped. Crossed his arms over his chest. "When are you going to turn the gravity room back on?"

"I told you, twenty four hours. It hasn't been nearly that long."

This did not make him happy. Of course, he could list the things that made him happy on zero fingers so he wasn't really that concerned with happiness. Felt a sort of dread descend on him about this child. About what he was supposed to do with the woman now that he had gotten her pregnant.

The dread got even heavier when he realized that he would never be able to leave her now that she was pregnant. That he was stuck here until the kid was old enough to take care of himself, and wondered if a part of himself wasn't insanely happy about that. Because he had never really had a place anywhere before.

"And what am I supposed to do until you decide I'm fit enough to train?" he demanded, felt a bit silly saying that after the long silence.

She just smiled at him. Shook her head back and forth sadly. "I don't, Vegeta, maybe you should try and figure out whether or not you intend to be a prick the whole time we're here or not."

And he frowned at that. At her. At the implication. Stopped her when she tried to walk away from him. Thought back to the way the big idiot had been looking at her with such interested eyes while he had been there, in the yard, and he felt an internal growl of anger at that. That idiot didn't even deserve to be in her presence. "If it's my son, than I intend to be here when he's born. Whether I'm a 'prick' or not."

"IF?" she demanded. Practically shouted it, and he felt a wave of pride go through him. Loved that she was so fierce and proud. "DID YOU SEE ANY OTHER SAIYANS RUNNING AROUND HERE?! Just who could I be fucking that would give me a Super Saiyan son?!"

Oh, the reply was there, trembled on his lips. But he didn't say it. Bit it back, snapped down on the caustic reply of 'Kakarot' and squashed it deep down inside of himself in the pit of jealousy and (not that he would ever admit this to anyone) pride he had where that stupid Saiyan was concerned.

But she saw the moment of hesitation and opened her mouth in an offended squawk. "ASSHOLE!" she said. "He's MARRIED!" And she smacked him-hard-and stormed away.

But, he thought as he stood there, she had thought of Kakarot too. What did that say? (That he was the only other Saiyan on the planet but the brat, and if that little brat was screwing someone he needed a medal of some form for being the youngest Saiyan to hit puberty ever.)

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"Drama, drama, drama."

Bulma: jerk. Just see if you get any ever again.

Vegeta: Puh-leeze, this is Card we're talking about. If I go more than a chapter without sex she gets fidgety.

Bulma: Yeah, well, I hope you like masturbating! Because you are so not getting any from me ever again.

Vegeta: *swirly eyes. * I just had the strangest feeling of déjà vu. Like I've said that somewhere before.

Bulma: Said what? That 'You're not getting any ever again'?

Vegeta: Yeah.

Gk: *jumps in * I know where you said it! *hop, hop, hop * But, speaking seriously, do you think I'm going to get any sex in here?

*Giant magic 8 ball appears out of nowhere, being shaken by a mysterious hand of power. Turns over and from the murky blue water, there appears the message: * OUTLOOK DOES NOT LOOK GOOD.

Gk: *whine * No fair!