Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Pruple Surprise ❯ Chapter 1

Purple Surprise--Part 1

By: Bulmafox

It was a beautiful, sunny day, and Bulma was in her lab, working on yet another machine. She decided to take a break and go eat lunch. On her way to the kitchen, she stopped to look at a calendar. "Man, those parts still aren't in yet. Serves me right for buying from a rival company", Bulma said to herself, "Speaking of late, I don't know why I thought this, but my period is three days late. Strange, that's never happened before." She went on to fix her lunch.

After Bulma ate, a nagging feeling came over her that just would not go away. Bulma realized what this could mean, so she went to a drugstore to but a pregnancy test, to rule out the possibility that she was pregnant. I'll buy a pregnancy test, it will read negative, and life will return to normal. But I'll buy a second one, just in case. Bulma bought the two tests and went home to use them.

Thirty minutes later, Bulma checked the results of the first test. "Let's see, two lines means pregnant, one line, not", she read. She did a little drumroll and looked at the test. She couldn't believe her eyes; there were two lines. Uh…this one's hard to read. I'll use the plus-minus one. Let's see, plus, pregnant, minus, not. Three minutes later, the results from the second test were ready. Bulma braced herself before reading the results. It was a plus sign. Bulma instantly felt faint, and she sat down on the floor. "So, I'm definitely pregnant. I guess I should see a doctor", Bulma said aloud. She immediately got into her car and drove to a doctor's office a few zip codes away.

"There's no question about it, you're pregnant", the doctor told Bulma, "You're about…one month along."

"A month?" Bulma asked to herself. She flashed back to that what she did with Vegeta that night. She remembered it vividly: the feel of Vegeta's body pressed against hers, the slow, deliberate way he caressed her body, the way he got her to climax…and again…and again…and again--

"Bulma…Bul-ma…Bulma!" the doctor called, "Are you there?"

"What…yes, yes I'm here. Did I doze off?"

"You were off in La-La-Land. Why don't you go home and get some rest? I'll call you, and we can schedule your next appointment then."

"Okay, thanks." Bulma left the office and went home.

When Bulma got home, she walked to her lab and grabbed a little device containing some buttons, then she went to the gravity room. She pressed a few buttons on the device to reset the gravity and she entered the room.

"Woman, what are you doing here?" Vegeta asked.

"Vegeta, do you remember that night when we went to that Italian restaurant? What we did when we got home?"

"Do I ever."

"Well, I'm pregnant."

"What?? But we slept together only once!"

"So? Once is all it takes."

"What makes you so sure I'm the father?"

"Because you're the only man I've slept with recently."

"What about your ex-boyfriend?"

"If Yamcha were the father, then it would have been born at least two or three months ago!"

"I demand a DNA test."

"Vegeta, really, how many men do you think could've gotten me pregnant?!"

"I still demand a DNA test."

"Fine, I'll schedule one for 9:00 AM tomorrow. Don't be late."

"Fine, I'll prove I'm not the father of any child!" Vegeta yelled after Bulma as she was

leaving. "Me, a father? Ha, as if", Vegeta snorted to himself. He did a particularly fierce kick, but he overestimated the gravity in the room, so he flipped and fell flat on his face.

The next morning, Bulma woke Vegeta up at 7:00 am, and got ready for the appointment. At 8:00 am, Bulma dragged Vegeta to her car and drove to the farthest Capsule Corp DNA lab she could find on such short notice.

Bulma and Vegeta arrived at the lab at exactly nine o'clock. Bulma walked up to the receptionist's desk and told the woman behind the counter, "Excuse me miss, I'm here for my nine o'clock appointment."

The receptionist, Betty, looked up and asked, "Oh, Bulma Briefs, what are you doing here? Someone named Bloomers is scheduled for a nine o'clock."

Bulma explained, "I know that, silly. I am `Bloomers'."

"OH, my apologies, ma'am. This way, please." As Betty walked by Vegeta, she asked Bulma, "By the way, is this fine young specimen coming with us?"

"I resent being called a specimen," Vegeta told the woman, "I'm not some science experiment of yours!"

Bulma jabbed Vegeta in the side with her elbow and said, "Yes, he's coming with me. And no, you can't have him."

"Aw, why not?" Betty whined.

"There's a man and a woman together at a DNA lab. You figure it out", Vegeta said as he walked down the hall with Bulma.

Betty thought for a minute, then she got what Vegeta was talking about. She yelled, "Congratulations!" down the hall.

When Bulma and Vegeta reached the room they were supposed to be in, they found a tall, lanky man in a lab coat waiting for them. "Good day, I'm Dr. Gordon Ashborough. And how may I help you today, Miss Bulma?" the young man greeted.

Bulma said, "Before we get started, you absolutely have to promise on your life that you won't tell my dad about this. I would really hate it if he found out."

"All right, I won't tell him."

"You also have to promise that this visit stays between the three of us." Bulma added, referring to Vegeta, the doctor, and herself.

"Okay, okay, this visit will remain confidential. So, what do you need done today?"

"I need a paternity test done. Believe it or not, I'm pregnant, and I need to prove that this lunkhead got me this way." Bulma explained, referring to Vegeta.

"Hey!" Vegeta shot back, "I resent being called that! That is a name for Kakarot! Besides, I did not father any child of yours. We just had one night of fun, that's all. It does not mean I'm going to have a brat!"

"Yes it does, Vegeta, and I'm going to prove it!" Bulma turned back to the doctor. "So, what are you waiting for? Get on with the test before he storms out of here."

"All right," the doctor explained, "I'll need one sample from the embryo, and one sample from the could-be father."

Vegeta flinched a little.

"Oh come on, you're not scared of a little needle, are you?" Bulma taunted. "Goku's the one that's scared of needles."

"Of course not! I'm nothing like Kakarot!" Vegeta told Bulma. He turned to the doctor and said, "Give me your best shot!"

After Dr. Ashborough collected the samples, he left the room to process the samples. One hour later, he returned with the test results.

Vegeta was surprised, to say the least. "You're back already?! I thought it was supposed to take weeks upon weeks to do!"

Bulma said, "That's why we went to a Capsule lab. Our technology is light years ahead of everyone else's, as if you didn't already know that."

"Bulma", the doctor said, "You were right. This man right here is the father of your child."

"That's a lie!" Vegeta burst out, "The test was tainted, or…something. Or else you did the test too quickly." As a last resort, Vegeta added, "Bulma messed with the test. She wants me to be the father."

"Vegeta, I've was in this room the whole time! You saw me!"

The doctor added, "I'm sorry uh…Vegeta, but you have to face facts. You're going to be a daddy in exactly eight months."

Right then, the receptionist conveniently walked into the room. "Uh, Miss Bulma, your dad's here."

Bulma told the doctor, "Remember, you promised", before dragging Vegeta to another room down the hall.

Dr. Briefs walked into the room and greeted the young doctor and the receptionist. "Good morning, y'all. Don't mind me, I'm just doing a routine evaluation of the building." He snooped around the doctor's room. He picked up the results of the paternity test and asked, "You mind if I take a look at this, doctor?"

"Yes, I do mind. The client asked that the test be kept confidential."

"Aw come on, just one little peek? I won't tell anybody."

"I'd really rather you didn't look at the test."

"What's so important that I can't see it?"

"Dr. Briefs, the test is confidential. That means only the client and I have access to it."

"But I won't tell, I promise!"

All of a sudden, Bulma walked in for a last-minute save. "Okay doctor, I'm done. You passed the test."

Dr. Briefs asked his daughter, "What are you doing here, Bulma?"

"I'm doing an evaluation of the building, of course, and they passed with flying colors."

"Oh, all right then Bulma, I expect a report on my desk by eight tomorrow morning."

Bulma smiled as wide as possible and said, "Sure, Dad. Bye now."

"But Bulma, aren't you going out with me for breakfast?"

"Later, Dad."

"But-"

Bulma practically shoved her father out the door. "I'll call you later. Bye now, Dad." As soon as Dr. Briefs left the building, Bulma paid the doctor for the visit, including a thirty dollar tip for his trouble, and she dragged Vegeta out to her car.

"Let go of me!" Vegeta burst out.

"Oh, what's got the Prince in such a rotten mood now? You know that doctor's right.

Like they say, you reap what you sow," Bulma retorted.

"Oh? You're the one who started it."

"Me? What did I do?"

"You had to go and confess those stupid feelings of yours, and then you threw yourself out there for me to take!"

"No one said you had to fall for it."

"Come on, no man in his right mind could resist the way you put yourself out there."

"Oh, so now it's my fault?"

"Yes!"

"No, no, no. The way I remember it, you wanted me first."

"That's a lie! You're the one who wanted to go home first!"

"You're the one who carried me to my bedroom!"

"You're the one who said you weren't scared!"

"You're the one who took your clothes off first!"

"Only my shirt!"

"So? That still counts."

Unbeknownst to Bulma and Vegeta, Piccolo was listening in on their argument. So, Bulma is pregnant with Vegeta's child. This could be very useful. Piccolo waited until Bulma and Vegeta left, then he walked into the building. He walked up to a second receptionist named Mina and asked, "Did someone named Bulma Briefs come in recently?"

"Yes", Mina answered.

"What doctor did she see?"

"Let's see…Dr Ashborough. Third door on the left." Piccolo walked to the doctor's office and made sure no one was around before he went in. He scoured the room and grabbed all the papers pertaining to Bulma's pregnancy, then he slinked his way to the main lab. Piccolo swiped a printout of Vegeta's DNA test, then he slipped out the back door and flew back to his meditation spot.

After Piccolo returned to his spot, he reviewed the papers he swiped. This evidence is good and all, but it's not conclusive…a videotape would be great. Now, if a videotape exists, who would have it? Yamcha would, he thought. Piccolo flew to Yamcha's apartment at top speed.

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"No, no, NO!" Yamcha yelled at the TV, "You stupid batter, you just got us three outs! If I were out there, I'd show him a thing or two!"

"Why don't you, then?"

"'Cause that retarded coach won't let me play. Says I'm `too aggressive'. That's what this game needs, some good old-fashioned aggression!"

"That's the spirit, Yamcha", Puar cheered.

"At least you're on my side", Yamcha said. He heard someone knock on the door. He shouted, "Come in!"

Piccolo came in and asked Yamcha bluntly, "Do you have a videotape of Vegeta and

Bulma procreating?"

"Over there", Yamcha said. He pointed to a tape in his entertainment center labeled `Vegeta and Bulma'.

Piccolo picked up the tape and asked, "Mind if I borrow it?"

"Keep it. That tape turns my stomach."

Piccolo left with the tape and Yamcha turned back to the TV. "Aw geez, I can't believe we blew a ten run lead!" Yamcha ranted, "Somebody should really fire that coach!"

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A few days later, Goku and Gohan went to Bulma's house. Vegeta was eating lunch in the kitchen when he overheard the conversation in the living room.

"Are you sure you don't mind watching Gohan?" Goku asked.

"I'm sure. Gohan's a good kid. He can practically watch himself", Bulma told Goku

Gohan blushed slightly and said, "Gee, thanks Bulma."

Bulma knelt down to Gohan's eye level and said, "Really, I mean it, kid."

Goku said, "I'll be back for him at eight o'clock, okay?"

"Okay", Bulma said.

"You be good for Bulma, all right?" Goku told Gohan.

"Okay, Daddy," Gohan said, "Bye now!"

Vegeta froze when he heard Gohan say "Okay, Daddy." The word `daddy' echoed through his mind and brought up images of five little boys, all of whom looked exactly like him, crawling all over him and pulling his hair, saying, "Hey Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! "No! I'm not ready for that yet! I don't want a bunch of brats crawling all over me. More images flowed through his mind: the same bunch of boys wrecking the house while playing Eminem at full blast and a sonic boom of cries crashing through the house. Then he thought about what would happen if they were all girls. He could just imagine a bunch of little Bulma clones smearing makeup all over the walls, then he thought about a very tired Bulma requiring three pots of coffee just to send all ten kids off to school. No! I'm not ready! Vegeta's mind screamed out as he made a hole in the roof and flew off.

"Whoa Bulma, what was that?" Gohan asked as he and Bulma raced to the kitchen.

"I guess Vegeta flew off ",Bulma said.

"Why do you think he did that?"

Bulma made up an excuse and told Gohan, "I guess he really needed to get back to his training."

"That reminds me, I need to train, too. I'll be in the backyard if you need me." Gohan went out the back door to train.

I know what's wrong, Vegeta. You're terrified of fatherhood, aren't you? Bulma looked down at her still flat belly and thought, I don't blame you. Motherhood won't be so easy, either.

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I've got to get away! I need some time to think! Vegeta thought as he raced to nowhere in particular. He almost ran into someoe in his hurry to fly away. Vegeta shouted out, "Hey, watch where you're going, you little--" He stopped when he saw who he almost ran into. "Well, well, well, so the Namek finally decided to crawl out of whatever little rock he came from."

"Don't start with me, Vegeta," Piccolo said, "I came to use you as my punching bag."

"Oh really? What if I refuse?"

"You won't. You wouldn't want everyone finding out about your dirty little secret, now would you?"

"Oh? And exactly what is it that you think you know about me?"

"Bulma's pregnant with your child, that's what."

"And what proof do you have?"

"All that I need. when I'm through with you, you'll be so badly beaten that you'll wish you were dead, and Bulma will be locked up in an insane asylum."

"I'm stronger than you and you know it. Now, unless you have some concrete evidence you'd like to show me, I suggest you get out of my way!"

Piccolo handed Vegeta a piece of paper. "This is from my DNA test!" Vegeta said, surprised. "Where'd you get this from?!"

"There's more where this came from. There's even a videotape of you two...let's just say you were acting naughty."

"What?! No such thing exists!"

"You can see it if you want. It's right there in full color. So, we can do this the easy way, or the hard way."

"...Fine, you win," Vegeta grumbled. "But I will find a way out of this!"

"I doubt that", Piccolo said. He and Vegeta flew to the nearest mountain range.

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