Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Satan Video ❯ Shoplifting Madness ( Chapter 11 )

Yes, I'm still alive. Work has been a bitch lately, but hey I'm pleased to announce that I'm finally leaving that place. Yep, Blockbuster can kiss my ass, but no worries. My inspiration for this story will not leave just because I finally got the juevos to get the hell out of there. Unfortunately, the memories of that place have been permanently burnt into my soul. AAAAHHHH!!! Won't the insanity ever end? Uh anyway, here's the next chapter.

DISCLAIMER: I don't DBZ, blah, blah, blah. I also want to state that I am in no way biased against any religions, so don't get mad at me. I just feel that anything can be taken to the extreme, and a few nut cases where I live seem to prove this.

Last time: Bulma and Vegeta go for round 2. Yamcha gets a visit from a strange woman and a scolding from Krillin.

Chapter 10: Shoplifting Madness

Bulma arrived at her apartment a few minutes later even more confused than before. She assumed both of them would see that night as a drunken mistake, but he obviously wasn't feeling any regrets. Whether or not he was just using her, she didn't know nor did she really care. She was just along for ride. `Shit, I need to hurry up,' she thought as she glanced at the clock. She took a quick shower and ate a sandwich before leaving for work 15 minutes late already. She got there to find Marron waiting for her.

"A little later than usual, aren't we?" Bulma just grinned and proceeded to get things ready for tonight's shift. Marron was stunned. Bulma was not a rude person, but she loathed her job to a degree that most people could only imagine, and it plainly showed. Today was different. `No sarcastic remarks, not even an annoyed glare. Could she actually be happy?' she wondered before grinning wickedly.

"Someone must have gotten some today," Marron declared at high volume causing the guy at the counter to choke on his chewing gum. Piccolo was on the other side of the store, yet the distance was not great enough to prevent him from overhearing Marron's comment. He couldn't help but cringe. `Damn humans.'

"Right," Bulma said in an exaggeratedly slow manner as she rolled her eyes, trying to hold back the laughter. `If only she knew how right she was.'

Meanwhile…

After taking out the trash, Vegeta decided to take a quick shower. He got dressed and entered the living room where the scent of their earlier activities had yet to dissipate. Knowing his roommate would be home very shortly, he grabbed the strongest smelling thing he could find: incense. Lighting the offensive little stick, his nose wrinkled at the powerful odor it was emitting. It wasn't a particularly bad smell, just strong especially considering his heightened olfactory senses. He was about five minutes too late, though, as Goku burst through the door and quickly shut it behind him.

A look of contemplation graced his features before his stare met Vegeta's, giving him a knowing look.

"What?"

"It smells like someone's been having some fun," he stated with a grin.

"I don't know what you are talking about." Goku rolled his eyes at the insult to his intelligence.

"Oh please. So who is she?" Vegeta had to fight back the satisfied smile that was trying to emerge.

`That damn stick must have helped some if he doesn't know who was here.' "Kakarotto, you have completely lost what little rational thought you had. The only thing I smell is the cheap ass incense I got from the convenient store down the street."

Goku eyed him suspiciously but decided to drop the subject. He knew someone had been here, but Vegeta obviously didn't want to talk about it.

"So anyway, what are we going to eat tonight?" Goku asked.

"I don't know. We've finally run out of those shitty noodles, so there's really nothing to eat." Goku sat there for a moment, thinking.

"Oh well, I guess I get to use my last resort." Vegeta raised an eyebrow.

"What's that?"

"You're not going to like it," Goku replied with a chuckle.

Back at the store…

Bulma was so engrossed in her work that she didn't even realize Krillin had come in to get a movie. When she looked up, she found that Marron had cornered him and was whispering something in his ear. Bulma could only imagine what it was as his already crimson cheeks turned two shades darker. She finally pulled away from him when the phone rang.

"Satan Video, This is Marron."

"You bunch of Satanic hooligans, you're all gonna burn in hell!"

"Excuse me?"

"You must repent your evil ways." With that, the person hung up. Bulma noticed the confusion on her face.

"What was that all about?"

"Some wacko said we were going to burn in hell or something," Marron replied as she finally hung up the phone.

"Oh it's just those church fanatics again. Don't let them bother you."

"Again? You mean they've called before?"

"Someone usually calls every few months, but they must have a new mission to cleanse the city or something, because they have called almost everyday this week! Just hang up on them if they call again. There's no reasoning with those people. Believe me, I've tried." Marron just nodded, still confused as to why they think the store's full of Satanists.

Bulma looked up toward the exit when the security sensor went off. Two guys in their early teens froze momentarily before looking at each other and bolting out the door. Piccolo had just walked back up to the counter when it happened and almost couldn't contain his excitement as he took off after the two shoplifters. It only took about two seconds to find them. They were running as fast as they could down the street and almost made it into the bank parking lot, but they stopped suddenly when a green man descended from the sky and landed in front of them.

Their eyes nervously shifted from each other to Piccolo and back before one nodded. The two jumped full speed at the video store clerk, hoping that two against one would be sufficient enough odds. Piccolo simply stepped to the side, allowing the first one to fly past him. As the second one came at him ready to strike, he caught his fist and slowly tightened his grip until he heard a loud crunch followed by screaming. Releasing him, the boy stumbled backward a few feet before tripping over a crack in the road. He fell on his ass, carefully bracing his hand. The first assailant had stopped and turned to charge him again, but wasn't fast enough. Piccolo kicked him in the gut and sent him flying to the other side of the street where the curb halted his momentum. Piccolo placed his foot on the guy's chest and powered up a ki ball in his hand.

"I….I'm sorry…..I'll..n..never steal…again. I promise." Piccolo brought the glowing sphere closer to his face. The culprit began pulling the DVDs from his waistband and laid them on the ground next to him. Piccolo pressed his foot further into his chest, causing him to cry out in pain before releasing the blast inches to the right of his face. The boy soiled himself, and Piccolo began laughing hysterically as he removed his foot from his victim's chest.

"Get the hell out of here. I don't want to see your ugly faces ever again!" The shoplifter nodded and ran across the street to get his friend who was still sitting on the ground, holding his crushed hand. The two were gone in seconds. Piccolo sat there for a moment, thoroughly pleased with himself, before looking at the DVDs on the ground. "Guess I have to go back to work now," he complained as he gathered the loot and walked back to the store.

Piccolo dropped all the items on the counter as Bulma walked up.

"I'm surprised you would care to get our stuff back." He stared at her before replying.

"I could care less about the crap those two stole. I just couldn't pass up an opportunity to scare the shit out of someone." Bulma just shook her head.

"Well, I'm assuming that I won't see either one of them anytime soon then."

"No, they won't be coming back. And before you ask, no, I did not kill them."

At Yamcha's…

Yamcha had sat at his kitchen table wallowing in self pity for over an hour. He finally decided to get up and do something to try to get his mind off the inevitable. He was about to walk out the door when the phone rang. `That better not be Krillin.' He walked over to the phone, calming his nerves before he answered.

"Hello." No one answered. "Hello?" Still nothing and he hung up. He walked back toward the door when the phone rang again. Sighing in annoyance, he turned around and grabbed the phone again.

"Hello." No response. "Damn it. I am not in the mood for this shit so you better." He was interrupted by a feminine voice.

"Yamcha. Sorry I seem to be having trouble with my phone."

"Who is this?"

"I'm surprised you have to ask. Well, after you left so quickly this afternoon, I thought about our relationship and decided that we need to have a serious talk. Meet me at the park on South St. in one hour."

"How did you get this number? Never mind, it doesn't matter. I thought I made myself perfectly clear earlier, but apparently not. There is no us, no relationship, nothing. The other night was a mistake. Please, leave me alone." He hung up and stormed out the front door.

Dial tone rang in her ear for almost a minute before she finally put the phone down. Closing her eyes, she let out a sigh before slowly opening them again. The corners of her mouth eerily turned upward. "If he wants to be difficult, then we can do it the hard way."

At the grocery store….

Goku and Vegeta landed on the roof of a store they never shop at, and Goku ran through his plan one last time.

"Kakarotto, I'm not doing this. A prince does not stoop to these measures." He turned to go back to their apartment.

"That's fine, but if you don't help me, you won't get to eat." Vegeta stopped at the edge of the roof when his stomach roared loud enough that the people in the parking lot could have heard if they had been listening. Sighing in defeat, he turned and walked back toward Goku.

"This will not happen again. Do you understand? I swear to Kami, I will kill you slowly if you tell anyone about this." Goku jumped up and down in excitement, completely ignoring the threats of his roommate.

"Alright Vegeta, let's do this!"

Vegeta shook his head, disgusted at himself for being weak, as the duo descended to the entrance of the grocery store. Goku grabbed a shopping cart and the two proceeded to go shopping. In a few minutes, the cart was full of every kind of meat the store sold as well as all the chocolate bars Vegeta could cram in there. After all, the prince had a bit of a sweet tooth. They tossed a couple of cases of beer in the bottom of the cart and piled as many bags of chips as they could balance on the massive mountain of meat and candy.

Satisfied with their selections, the two got as close to the exit as possible before executing the final stage of their plan. Goku grabbed the handle of the buggy while Vegeta grabbed the other end. Vegeta took a deep breath and shook his head before giving Goku a nod. They levitated with the shopping cart, careful not to spill any of its contents. The customers in the store were silenced in shock. One elderly woman fainted as they flew over the registers and out the exit, proceeding to go home. Not one store employee said a word; their speech was temporarily paralyzed from the mixture of fear and amazement.

They flew slowly to their apartment. Once they got there, Vegeta glanced around making sure there were no witnesses to this embarrassing predicament. Satisfied that no one was around, they landed on the balcony. Goku unlocked the door and they drug the shopping cart inside. Vegeta dumped the food on the living room floor, before taking the cart back outside and blasting it to nothingness.

Vegeta flew back inside, not surprised to find Goku knee-deep in chips, stuffing his face as if the food would disappear were it not consumed in exactly five minutes. Rolling his eyes, he sat down on the floor next to their dinner. He grabbed a package of steak and proceeded to eat it raw intermittently taking swigs of beer.

Back at the store…

Chi Chi entered the store and walked up to Bulma. "Hey girl, what've you been up to? I never see you anymore."

"Yeah well, between this hell hole and school, I'm surprised I have time to think. So how've you been? Still bartending at that club?"

"I'm working at that new club down the street. You need to come check it out sometime. It's so much better than that dump I was at before. Actually, I'm going to work in a little while. When do you get off?"

"I'm closing tonight and the rest of the week. Maybe I'll stop by my next day off."

"I'm going to hold you to that now. Oh, I forgot the whole reason I came in here. My movie is late. Can you cut me a break?"

"No problem. You can just give me a free drink when I come by your club."

"Alright. Thanks Bulma. I'll see you later."

Later…

The apartment was a disaster. Two Saiyajin lounged lazily on the floor, drinking their beer, surrounded by various crumbs, food particles, empty beer cans, and plastic packaging. The TV was on, but neither was really watching it. After a feast like that, they were battling sleep.

"Hey Vegeta."

"Huh?"

"That was fun. We should do that again."

"Fuck you, Kakarotto. I will never do something as degrading as that again."

"You sure weren't complaining when you ate 20 pounds of steak."

"I'm going to bed." Vegeta got up and went to his bedroom, leaving Goku to his TV.

"Hey another chocolate bar!"

Next time: The crazy church fanatics are doing what?!! Yamcha's `friend' turns out to be a complete psycho.

Please review! They are not going to a selfish cause, like boosting my ego or giving me something to brag about to my husband, I promise. So Please, Por Favor, Onegai Shimasu. Uh I don't know how to say it in any other languages. Sorry.