Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Switch-A-Roo ❯ Swtich-A-Roo ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: Author makes know claim on DB/Z/GT.

 

 

SWITCH-A-ROO

 

 

 

Vegeta clinched his fits and looked down at the seven glowing Dragonballs. All he had to do was summon the dragon make a wish and all his troubles would be over. There would be no more of that stupid third class Saiyan warrior lording his superior strength around. Vegeta would finally regain his title as Prince of Saiyan. “Dragon.” Vegeta's deep voice rumbled through the silence of the night. “I command you to come forth.”

 

Bulma took a sip of her coffee before leaning her forehead against the window. The blue eyes grew large as she noticed Vegeta standing over the glowing Dragonballs. She stood up straight and dropped her cup, a startled gasp bursting from her chest.

 

“Is something wrong, Dear?” Bunni Briefs looked up from the skillet she was using to fix breakfast.

 

Bulma didn't bother to answer. She moved swiftly through the kitchen and out the door.

 

Bunni looked to the broken mug and the coffee rolling down over the wall. “Gracious, I really thought I raised that girl a little better.”

 

Bulma wasn't completely sure what Vegeta was planning, but she was kicking herself for not suspecting this turn of events sooner. Just before Vegeta had disappeared he had been ranting and raving about Goku's abilities yet again. There was no doubt in her mind that Vegeta had finally had enough of being surpassed. No doubt he was ready to take matters into his own hands.

 

The Dragon was shooting skyward as Bulma burst from the house and rushed around the corner. “Vegeta! What in hell do you think your doing?”

 

Vegeta kept his back to her. He didn't need Bulma's endless lectures. She always wanted him to give up his single sided feud. “Go away, woman. You don't have any say in this.”

 

Bulma came to a halt behind him and ignored the fact the eternal dragon looked over them. “Please Vegeta, just listen to me.”

 

“I am done listening to you.” Vegeta clinched his fists and snarled. “Bulma, I don't want to be friends with that moronic joke you call a friend. All I want is to see him crushed under my boot, and if this is the only way then so be it.”

 

“Damn you Vegeta!” Bulma shouted so hard that her eyes clinched shut. “I wish just once you would try to understand how I feel.”

 

The red eyes glowed as Bulma's words echoed through out the morning air. “Your wish has been granted.”

 

Vegeta froze for a moment. “Wish. What WISH!” Then he turned to glare at Bulma. “You stupid Bitch.”

 

“But. But. But.” Bulma stammered. And then her world split in two. Well not exactly in two. She saw everything in doubles. She shook her head hard trying to keep clear her vision. For a moment she thought she was going to faint, by sheer determination of her will she managed to keep her feet. The vision finally cleared and she stared at mirror image of herself. “Vegeta? You look just like me.” She whispered.

 

A scowl cut over the lovely features as Vegeta glared at Bulma. “I could say the same thing.”

 

Bulma blinked and then looked down at her suddenly armor covered chest. The jaw dropped as she reached up to slap her hands on to her chest, and then her rear. She swallowed hard before reaching around to place one hand tentatively on her crotch. Bulma felt her fingers running over the newest member to her antimony. Rapid disbelieve caused her to pull open the tight blue spandex pants. It had to be her imagination. That…. That… could not be on her. The blue eyes grew large as she came face to face with reality.

 

“AHH!” Bulma screamed.

 

Vegeta who was cupping the large mounds of flesh that were encased in the torture device Bulma had called a bra. “What are you yelling about? I have watermelons strapped to my chest!”

 

This did not stop Bulma's screaming for a moment.

 

Vegeta dropped his hands and growled. “Damn it woman. Stop screeching like that in my body and give it back.”

 

“I would if I could.” Bulma collapsed to her knees. Looking at her white glove covered hands clinching in the earth. “I love you Vegeta. I really do, but I don't want to be you.”

 

“Then that makes two of us.” Vegeta placed his hands on his hips. “Now fix it.”

 

“Fix it?” Bulma looked up at him with large eyes. “I can't fix this. It will take a year before the Dragon can be summoned again. That is if we get to all the dragonballs first.”

 

The meaning of her words swept through Vegeta causing him to shudder. “You're not making me happy.”

 

Bulma pushed back to her feet and snorted. “This is good because I wasn't trying. We could try telling Goku about this. He could instant transmission us to Namek and we could…”

 

Blue eyes flashed. “NO! There is no way that I am going to ask that third rate mentally challenged even for a half wit for anything, least of all his help. Think of something else.”

 

“Maybe my father could…”

 

“Again no. I will not have the man laughing at me until the end of my days.” Vegeta scowled.

 

“You had better stop doing that, you're going to give me premature wrinkles.” Bulma snapped back. “I don't know what from me, Vegeta.”

 

“I want you to fix this before anyone finds out.”

 

“I already explained I could not fix this. I don't want any people pointing and laughing at me either.”

 

“Good them it's settled.” Vegeta turned to stalk away. “You are going to fix this and we aren't going to tell anyone it ever happened.”

 

“You aren't listening to me!” Bulma rushed after him and then stopped. It was hopeless. There was no way she was ever going to talk sense into Vegeta. When he got something in his brain it stayed that way. To bad for her right now he had the idea that she was going make it all better.

 

In the distance she heard her mother say. “Are you going to want breakfast, dear?”

 

In response she heard her own voice replying. “I will start with five Texas omelets and go from there.

 

“Five? Texas? Omelets?” Was the man mad? Did he have any idea how many hours on the treadmill that was going to take to burn off? She ran for the house throwing open the door so hard it flew from its hinges. It seemed there were some things about being in Vegeta's body that would take some getting use to.

 

“Oh my Vegeta, Are you hungry too?” Bunni put her hand to her mouth looking at the damage.

 

Bulma ignored her. “You can't eat of that you will get fat!” She shouted at Vegeta who was kicked back on the chair waiting for his food.

 

“Then what am I suppose to eat?”

 

Bulma stormed over the cabinet and tossed a bag of rice cakes at him. “You can have two of those if your hungry.”

 

Vegeta looked at the bag for a long moment. Raising his eyes to her with disbelief. “You have got to be kidding.”

 

“I assure you I am not kidding. There is no way I am going to let you blow up like a blimp.”

 

Vegeta stood up and slid the chair in. “Excuse us Bunni.” He took Bulma by the arm and led her from the room.

 

“That poor man. I hope she isn't to hard on him.” Bunni sighed and looked at the bowl of broken eggs.

 

Vegeta stopped where he was certain that Bunni could not hear. “If I have to starve then you're going to train.”

 

“Train? Me?” Bulma stepped back, not liking where this conversation was going. “If you mean the gym then I won't mind going?”

 

“Gym nothing. You know perfectly well that I have a rigorous schedule of training that I follow. You are worried that I might put a few pounds on your body. How do you think I feel about mine?”

 

“Fine. I will train.” Bulma crossed her arms and looked away. She figured she could sham it well enough. After all she had out witted personal trainers before. How hard could Vegeta be?

 

“Hey! That is exactly what I wanted to hear.”

 

The duo jumped and looked down the hall to see Goku making his way in long strides toward them.

 

“Hey Bulma.” Goku set his hand on Vegeta's shoulder, causing the man to grimace. “So what do you say Vegeta? Want to go out to the wastelands? Or maybe just hit the gravity room and do speed drills? Oh I know a push up contest!”

 

Bulma choked. The idea of trying to keep pace with Goku caused the oxygen to slip from her lungs. “Sorry. Not today. I don't feel well.” Turning on her heel she commented no further. Escape was the only thing on her mind.

 

“Alright Vegeta.” Goku looked down at Vegeta. “What is wrong with him?”

 

“Maybe he doesn't like the idea of your hand on his woman.” Vegeta snarled and shrugged the offender's touch from his shoulder. The skin fairly burned where Goku had touched it.

 

“You think? I am sorry. I am just so use to being around you I never think of that.” Goku rubbed the back of his head. “Since Vegeta is going to be moping all day, do you want to go to Roshi's? I know how you like the sun. I could get some training in and then catch us some nice sea food.”

 

Images of Goku training on the beach while he lay baking in the sun filled Vegeta's head. Then the thought of Goku actually handing him food like charity caused him to growl. The muscle bound moron. Like he would want to spend a day watching Goku frolic half naked on a beach. Vegeta opened his mouth to give Goku a scathing reply when he felt the wetness seeping between his legs.

 

“Bulma? Are you all right? You look very pale all of a sudden.”

 

“I can't I think I just caught what ever Vegeta has.” Turning on his heel he raced for his room. Rushing past Bulma who was lying on her back on the bed. He practically dove into the bathroom.

 

“Vegeta?” Bulma moved to the closed door. “Is everything alright in there?”

 

“No! I was about to tell Kakkarot off and then I got all wet.” Vegeta struggled to undo the buttons of Bulma's jeans.

 

“Oh.” Bulma nodded sympathetically. “That happens very time I am round Goku.”

 

“You get your period every time you're around Kakkarot?” Vegeta felt his eyes grow to the size of saucers.

 

“Period?” Bulma blinked, the flushed red. “Oh that. I thought you meant something else.”

 

“Like what?”

 

“Like nothing.”

 

“How do you stop the blood?” Vegeta pulled the pants from his legs and tossed them to the garbage.

 

Bulma froze. How in the hell was she going to explain to Vegeta how to use a tampon? “I have a box of tampons under the sink, Vegeta. You can read the box.”

 

There was a long silence before the explosion of the door being thrown open. “Damn you Bulma! I am not stuffing anything up there!”

 

“Excuse me? I can't believe you of all people would have a problem with it. After all we do have a son which is proof enough you have been there before.” Bulma scowled and crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“I can't stay like this.” Vegeta clinched his fists. The urge to cry was over coming him.

 

“I am the one who wanted Goku to help us. You are the one who said NO.” Bulma turned to look at the door. “He is still here, I am sure.”

 

“I will not ask for Kakkarot's HELP!” Vegeta shouted.

 

“Then shut up and use that tampon, and while your at it get use to it. I wont have you bitching at me.” With that said Bulma decided she was going out to shop. It was high time Vegeta had some nice clothes anyway.

 

Vegeta pulled the bathroom door shut and plopped down on the toilet. “This really sucks!”

 

***************************************************************** *******

 

Bulma yawned as she walked into her room. It had been a good day. She had been able to carry so much, walk so far, and buy so much.

 

Vegeta was curled up in the center of the bed. A thick blanket pulled over his form. The television was on, but he didn't seem to be paying attention. “Where have you been?”

 

“I told you shopping.” Bulma set the bags down and looked to see wrappers tossed all around the bed. “Are those chocolate wrappers?” She lifted on and felt her eyes bulge. “Dear Kami they are! DAMN IT! Vegeta, your going to make me blow up like a balloon.”

 

“Shut up! I have had a horrible day. I fell down the stairs after I was assaulted by the worse pains I have ever felt in my life.”

 

“You fell? What pain?” Bulma leaned on the bed and touched his head.

 

“Your mother called them menstrual cramps and she gave me something called Midol. It is mildly effective to say the least.”

 

“Oh please, I get those little cramps all the time. They are not going to kill you.” Bulma stalked to the bathroom. “Now if you will pardon me I need to take a shower.”

 

Bulma ignored him. It was fine payback for all the times he walked right past her. And let's not forget labor. He didn't have to deal with an ounce of that. Show some pride. Stop screaming. Weren't those his exact words? She smiled smugly.

 

This body exchange wasn't nearly as bothersome as she had thought it would be. Bulma striped the clothing from the strong Saiyan body and stepped into the shower. It was quite possibly the best wish she had ever made.

 

She lathered her hair and set her fingers to work in the spiky locks, so easy to manage. Bulma was in heaven as the hot water rolled over the rock like frame. Pulling up a washcloth she began washing, as she did so the new member began to rise to attention. She frowned and looked down at her little friend. “Don't get any bright idea's Mr.” She pressed it down with one finger. But the stubborn fellow sprung back with even more life.

 

Swallowing hard, Bulma looked from side to side. What was going on here? “Go back down…” She muttered. Reaching down she poked at the growing member.

 

Vegeta began beating on the door. “Bulma! I need in there. NOW.” He glowered at the door as he held the pillow to his stomach. He waited a while and listened to the sound of water as it was shut off. Still the door did not open. Waiting. Leaning his forehead to the wooden panel he growled. “You're not a woman any more so you don't have that excuse. Open the door now before I spring a leak that neither of us want to clean.”

 

“I can't come out.” The voice was wavering and unsure.

 

Vegeta lifted his head. Worry tingled down his back like icy fingers. “Care to share with me why you can't come out of there right now?”

 

The door opened and steam rolled out into the room. Vegeta backed up as Bulma stood head handing before him in his body. The hands holding a dark blue towel to his hips so it would not slip. “I have a problem.” She raised her dark eyes that were brimming with tears.

 

Vegeta paled. “Problem?”

 

Bulma opened the towel to reveal the huge erection. Vegeta's eyes blinked as all breath escaped his being. Tears rolling over Bulma's face as she poked at the straining manhood. “It… it… it wont go down.”

 

Vegeta straightened his shoulders and lifted his chin. He looked deep into the tearful eyes and said with icy venom. “Sorry. I have a headache.”

 

“But Vegeta!!”

 

Vegeta slid his aching form under the covers. “Tomorrow we get Kakkarot to take us to Namek.”

 

***************************************************************** *******

 

“Welcome to Namek! How can I help you?” the old Namekian stepped forward.

 

“We need the dragon balls.” Vegeta clasped his hands to his chest and batted the big blue eyes in a way he had seen Bulma do many time before. He forced himself to ignore Kakkarot and Bulma as they stood behind him

 

“So why did we come here again.” Goku leaned over to the person he thought was Vegeta and whispered.

 

A sharp elbow shot out and nailed him in the rib cage. “Listen. All you have to do is stand there until we are done.”

 

“The Dragonballs are never handed out to just anyone.” The old man clinched his walking stick tightly. “You have to pass a few tests to determine the worthiness of your cause.”

 

“Fine, bring them on.” Vegeta nodded. He punched one finely manicured hand into the other.

 

“First you must travel to the east until you come across a mythical beast. Defeat it in combat and return here. Once you return I will ask you a question. If you know the answer to my question I shall grant you use of the Dragonballs.”

 

“Oh Vegeta!” Goku slapped Bulma on the back. “You should have fun with this.”

 

Bulma flinched. “Yeah. About that.”

 

Vegeta kicked her in the shin hard, and only served to injure his dainty foot. “Kakkarot stay here. Vegeta and I can handle this.”

 

“We can?” Bulma whimpered putting her hand to her mouth.

 

“Yes. We can.” He didn't turn to Goku as he shouted, “Kakkarot, you stay here and do not interfere.”

 

Vegeta dragged Bulma off, as Goku blinked. “Did Bulma just call me Kakkarot?”

 

It wasn't far before Vegeta and Bulma reached a lake the lapped softy at its shore.

 

Vegeta walked forward to the water's edge. “I don't understand. Wasn't there suppose to be a monster here to fight?” He turned to glare at Bulma.

 

The water churned behind him and a huge beast rose. It lashed out with its long forked tongue scooping him up and dragging him into the air.

 

Vegeta snarled and ripped one arm free and threw it up to toss a ki blast at the unfortunate monster. Instead of an earth shattering blast, not so much as a puff of smoke appeared. “Oh crap.”

 

Bulma screamed and ducked behind a rock.

 

Vegeta looked down. “What are you doing? Blast it you heinous wench!”

 

“And how am I suppose to do that? You had years of training and practice killing things. I say we do what we are most proficient at. For me that is running and hiding!”

 

The monster stopped mid motion while Vegeta exploded in a ranting rage. “That really isn't going to help me out now is it!”

 

“Pardon me for not knowing how to go Super Saiyan after twenty four hours in a Saiyan body, you ass!” Bulma launched back.

 

Tentatively the monster set Vegeta down in front of Bulma. Clearly confused on what to do.

 

Vegeta shoved his finger in her face “You've seen me enough, you should try getting a clue! My body sure as hell knows. Why don't you just try listening to it?”

 

“My mind is obviously overpowering your body, cause it isn't saying anything!” Bulma gestured to the manly form she now stood in.

 

“As if that is even a remote possibly. You have got to be the most ignorant; self saturated person I have ever met!

 

The creature slid backwards, as terror filled its eyes. It's slow movement a sure sign the beast was trying to escape unnoticed.

 

Bulma tossed her head. “Excuse me have you even bothered to look in a mirror lately?”

 

“Yes I have. For all your talk about me dieting it seems you're not doing to good a job of it yourself. None of your jeans fit you, the bra you had was padded as well as being to big, and I noticed that bottle of blue dye that stated it works well on covering the gray!”

 

“YOU BASTARD!!!!” Bulma's vision shattered with her rage. Light flooded the area she stood upon. The ground shook and the clouds rolled past at increased speed. The dust storm kicked up by her rage was pushed back as a burst of power escaped her body. It left nothing standing unscaved save one very angry Super Saiyan three Bulma in Vegeta's body.

 

She glared around for the target of her rage. She saw nothing save the body of the slain beast pushed up on shore. Bulma heard the sound of screaming from above and looked up in time to catch the falling body in her arms.

 

Vegeta flinched as he looked into angry green eyes.

 

“You had better take that all back right now.” Bulma hissed.

 

“Yes dear.” Vegeta swallowed putting a hand to his mouth. No wonder women practiced the feminine arts of crying. The talent might come in handy right about now.

 

“Don't patronize me.”

 

Vegeta struggled out of her grasp and stumbled backwards. “Remember Bulma. If you kill me now you will never get your body back.”

 

Bulma reached down and grabbed the dead monster by its tail. “Fine. I did my part you answer their stupid riddle.”

 

Vegeta watched her walking off and let out a sigh of relief.

 

 

***************************************************************** *******

 

 

The Namkian Elder thanked them for outing down the beast that so violently attacked their people on numerous occasions. He turned with wise eyes and asked, “So tell me why do you have need of the Dragonballs? What do you find so important that you should travel here?”

 

Vegeta remained silent as Bulma walked close to the man and put her hands on his shoulders. “It is a private matter, but I will tell you.” She leaned in and whispered the story low.

 

Goku shifted wanting to know what was being said. Vegeta and Bulma had been so mysterious in this adventure. He was certain that when the wish was made he would know.

 

The Namek startled as realization took hold. Nodding he said, “I see no reason why not to let you use the balls. They have been gathered in the hall.” He turned on his walking stick a light chuckle escaping his lips.

 

Vegeta moved to Bulma's side. “What did you tell the old man?”

 

“The truth.” She clinched on powerful hand to her chest. Soon. Soon this mess would be over.

 

The sky grew dark, the wind more powerful, and the Dragon of Namek rose to the sky.

 

“So what is it you two are wishing for?” Goku asked.

 

“It's none of your business Kakkarot.” Vegeta snapped back.

 

Bulma sighed. “Vegeta is correct there are some things one is never meant to understand. Some times I just wish the two of you would learn to get along.”

 

A bright light engulfed them all and the Dragon's voice rumbled and echoed through out the land. “Your wish has been granted…”

 

THE END