The History of Kalika  

Shak’ems

    Large, obsidian orbs stared back at him in utter confusion. They rapidly disappeared behind dark green lids a few times before the head that held them began to shake furiously.   “No…no…no!”   “What do you mean no?!” Goten said with an air of distress. “I went thorough a lot of trouble setting this up for us. Y’know I don’t have a lot a pull around here. If any at all. I mean I’m not mister Trunks Briefs, the heir of Capsule Corporation or anything like that.”   He added this while cutting his eyes at the purple haired boy. To which said boy replied:   “What?!”   Goten’s gaze lingered a little longer before returning his attention to the slightly shorter green skinned teenager in front of them.   “Look Dende, Piccolo’s told us all about it…”   “Well actually he was talking to Gohan and you just happened to ‘overhear’.” Trunks helpfully pointed out.   The dark haired Demi immediately turned his death glare back on his boyfriend.   “Any-fucking-way!” A grin for Dende. “WE heard that you’d been a little stressed out lately. What with your guardianship over the entire Earth and all…”   “And you know after your outbursts at Krillin’s get together a few weeks ago…” Trunks added.   “Yeah, and with the dreams you’ve apparently been having.” Goten concluded. “We thought that maybe a little outing would be…um…”   “Beneficial!” The older Saiyan chimed in.   The young Namek couldn’t help but be a little alarmed at how the boys tended to finish each other’s sentences. It was a bit unnerving really. But then another thing sprung to the forefront of his thoughts.   “Piccolo told Gohan that?!” he shrieked in a decidedly ungodly manner. But then again, young Dende had always been a shrieker. Even the responsibility of the world hadn’t been able to breed that out of him.   “Well, I’m sure he only wanted to help!” the Briefs boy sputtered hurriedly. “I told you, you should have kept your big mouth shut!” he tersely whispered to his boyfriend.   “I will not stand by and watch my dear friend whither away like some…prudish old maid!” Goten shot back.   “He’ll be twenty next week, Goten!”   “So!”   Dende’s wide eyes went back and forth between the boys. His mouth dropping open wider and wider as the discussion only got more and more embarrassing for him.   “Hey!” He finally screamed.   Goten’s patented beaming Son grin was turned on yet again.   “Hey now.” He said placing his hand on the young guardian’s shoulder. “No need to get upset. This will be a pleasant experience for everyone involved…”   “But…”   “Believe me when I tell you that this place comes highly recommended from some extremely reputable sources.”   “Umm… Goten?” Trunks tried but to no avail.   “You have nothing to worry about, Dende. These people are skilled professionals.”   “B-but…   “Go-ten…he’s turning purple.”   “I believe me, there is nothing like an experience engineered by trained specialists. Some of these people are even third generation!”   “Goten!”   “But I don’t want to go to a strip club!” Dende finally erupted.   “Oh, Dende.” The teenager chuckled, bracing his other hand on the boy’s free sholder. “You only think you don’t want to.”   “But it’s ungodly.” The Namek whispered.   “Oh, and hooting ‘Take it off’ is?” Trunks asked.   Goten leaned down until he was eye level with his little green friend. Even though Dende was older and the god of his home planet, it didn’t mean that he was wiser.   “C’mon.” The boy giggled. “It’s ass and titties! What could be more godly then enjoying nature in all its splendor?!”   “That’s only if they’re real.” The lavender haired youth at his side pointed out.   Goten sounded almost bored as he added the last comment with a strait face. “Silicon is found in nature, Trunks.”   Dende could do nothing but sigh.   ******   “I think Chichi tried to poison me.” Goku said miserably.   A sigh.   “Kakarot, you ate 6 dozen cookies.” Vegeta said calmly.   “Well it’s not like that’s ever been a problem before.” The younger Saiyan pouted.   Vegeta had to help the poor idiot down the hall. He was still pale and shaking, it didn’t help that the Saiyan was a little heavier then he’d been the last time
Vegeta’d carried him anywhere. Well that might have to do with the fact that Kakarot wasn’t exactly willing this time.   “Do we really have to do this, Geta?” The taller one whined.   “Yes, we do. That harpy woman of yours is crazy if she thinks that she’s right about this. The onna will know what is really wrong with you.” Vegeta said confidently.   Goku grinned weakly. “Heh, you really think it’s impossible, Vegeta? Cause I don’t know. I have been feeling really weird lately.”   “Kakarot, please. Don’t you think I would know if my own mate was pregnant?!”   “Well want if the ki is too tiny to sense.”   In response to this Vegeta abruptly stopped, leaving Goku to fall over onto the nearest wall.   “No child of mine would ever have weak ki!” He roared in outrage.   Goku watched with wide eyes as out of no where, the frying pan of doom descended upon the prince’s unsuspecting head. Vegeta howled in pain before whipping around to discover the source of the annoyance.   “Don’t you dare yell at him!” ChiChi screamed as she raised the pan in the air for another go round. “Goku is in a delicate condition right now and I won’t let you upset him!”   “Look, you crazy bi…”   But Vegeta was silenced by just a wave of the pan.   “C’mon Goku.” The pan-wielding psycho said as she went to help her ex-husband up from the wall. She settled his arm over her shoulders before they made their way down the hall.   Vegeta rubbed at the growing knot on his head and grumbled angrily as he followed the pair.   “And who told you that you could touch him anyway, woman!”   ******   Bulma had been busy with another patient when the trio made it to her labs. Sitting cross-legged on the examination table grinning from ear to ear was Kalika.   Although she actually lived at the Capsule compound, she now spent at lot of time over at Gohan’s with the boys. Even with that being the case, Vegeta didn’t really see much of her anymore. Needless to say he had no idea that she was as huge as she was.   She was practically glowing, her ebony tail swaying happily behind her. Vegeta could feel the growing ki of his child radiating inside of her. The smirk was inevitable. He cut his eyes over at the once married pair before he walked over to the Pacific island girl.   “So,” he tried pathetically at small talk. “How are…things?”   “Oh, you mean the baby?” Kalika asked her amber eyes narrowed suspiciously.   “Hn.”   “Oh, she’s fine.”   “A female?!” He sneered.   “Yes. A girl.” She said slowly. Taking the care to make sure that the prince had understood that he’d impregnated her with a female child. “What? You got something against girls?”   “…”   “Oh, right! You do, don’t you?”    “Shut up, woman!”   “Oh, so I finally made it to woman status?” Kalika grinned.   Vegeta frowned.   “Oh Geta, I’m just fucking with you!”   Bulma stood a little bit away, smiling smugly at the two of them.   “He doesn’t take teasing well.” The blue haired woman laughed. “But don’t pay him any mind, Kalika. He was just like this when I got pregnant with Bra.   “For some reason he thinks that his princely sperm is only capable of making boys. It took almost the whole nine months to convince him that she wasn’t Yamcha’s kid.”   ChiChi suddenly started laughing.   “Am I the only person in this room that Vegeta hasn’t knocked up?!”   “Kakarot is not pregnant, woman!” Vegeta suddenly roared.   Kalika scoffed, “The hell he isn’t!”   The prince’s fury turned on the expecting female.   “I mean look at him Geta!” She continued as if she wasn’t getting the House of Vegeta’s family brand glare of death.   “He’s just getting fat!” The flame haired royal growled in defense.   ChiChi had gone to cover the man’s ears but she had been a little too late. Goku’s eyes widened in outrage and he whimpered.   “Vegeta!” Bulma shrieked.   “You insensitive asshole!” ChiChi screamed whipping out her frying pan.   “Geta! You said it was alright! You said you liked me with a little more meat on my bones!” Goku cried.   Bulma sweat dropped. Kalika was utterly enthralled. Mr. Briefs apparently waltz in at the wrong time and immediately turned around exiting the room.   ******   Dende was a bit… disturbed to say the least. He clutched the hood tighter around his head and peered out at this amazing new world with wide glassy black eyes.   “Goten?” He whispered urgently. “Are we even old enough to be in here?!”   “Shut up, Dende!” The dark haired Saiyan whispered back. “You’ll blow our cover!”   Trunks gave a withered look before passing his own fake ID to the bouncer. The taller man gave the three of them a disapproving glance before he took a look at the Demi’s identification.   “Mister Briefs!” A sharply dressed man erupted from the crowd suddenly, looking a bit nervous. “I don’t know how I could have missed you! I’m so sorry, Sir!”   Goten’s face suddenly flushed red in rage.   “Hey! Hey, buddy!” The youngest of the teens screeched. “This night it about my buddy Dende, here!”   The bouncer looked to Trunks for his approval. Trunks nodded slightly, hoping to the kais that his boyfriend hadn’t noticed.   “Yes, of course, Mister…” The other man began.   “Son!”   “Yes, Mister Son.” The club’s apparent manager stammered. “Right this way. We have our VIP section ready and waiting for you.”   Dende looked at the masses of people milling about. There were so many scantly clad women… and men. A furious blush lit up the Namekian’s face.   “Oh gods, oh gods! Why did I let them talk me into this?!”   The small alien’s thoughts were suddenly broken as he felt a hand settle lightly upon his shoulder.   “Goten!” He said whipping his whole body around and…   He suddenly found himself face to face with the loveliest pair of…what did Goten call them… ah yes…tittes he’d ever seen. Not that he’d seen many anyway. Not any like these.   “Hello.” The lovely lady said.   Well, he could only guess at her loveliness, as he was quite enthralled with her breasts at the moment. The young woman apparently took note of this and ventured a slim hand underneath his chin raising it upward. The act had knocked the hood off of his head, although, Dende didn’t even seem to notice. She had to be the most beautiful creature he’d ever seen.   Her skin was smooth as milk chocolate cream and the exact same color too. And her hair was even more lively and colorful then any fire he’d ever seen. The waves of crimson framed her pretty face making her hazel eyes sparkle in the dim lighting. She put the young Namekian in the mind of one of those anime girls that he tented to drool over on the Internet. Only… she was real!   “Hello, Mister Dende.” She said.   And her voice… even over the nauseating roar of the club’s music he’d still found himself enchanted by this lovely creature’s voice.   “Hello.” He said weakly.    She grinned at him. Showing off her perfect white teeth.   “My name is Kareesha.” She said softly though he could still hear her. “Welcome to Shak’ems.”   “Oh…th—thank you.”   “You’re very welcome.”   “C’mon, Dende!” Goten urged hopping around like a toddler.   It wasn’t until then that he’d noticed that his party had left him behind. The young guardian glanced from the dark haired Demi to Kareesha. And back again. He licked dry lips and tried to speak, the blush on his face threatening his very life.   “Would… I mean… are you…” He tried his best to get the words out.   Lucky for him the amazing creature before him took pity on him.   “C’mon now, Dende.” She beamed, her husky yet feminine voice making his heart flutter in his chest.   She then wrapped her arm around his shoulders enveloping him in her wonderful scent.   “You really shouldn’t keep your friends waiting. Especially, that one.” She added gesturing to Goten has they headed up the steps. “He seems a little over zealous.”   “Yeah,” Dende chuckled nervously. “It… it is his first time and all.”   “Oh?”   “Y-yeah, I told him to play it cool but you know…” He giggled horridly, even wincing at the sound before continuing. “Believe me I know.” He lied.   “Of course.” Kareesha smiled leaning in just a little closer. “There is nothing a lady likes more then a guy that can keep his cool.”   ******    “Yep.”   “Yep?”   “Yep.R 21;   “Yep, what woman?”   “He’s definitely knocked.”   “Knocked?” Goku squeaked.   “Yep, Goku. You’re definitely knocked.”   A deep sigh on Kalika’s part. “You’re preggers Kaki.”   A confused look.   ChiChi sighed in turn.   “You’re with child Goku. You know pregnant.”   “I’m gonna have a baby?!”   Thump   “Vegeta!” Bulma and Goku screeched in unison.   “You have got to be fucking kidding me!” ChiChi groaned.   Kalika just grinned. “Damn Geta, we should bottle your stuff and sell it.”   Bulma nudged the fallen prince in the side with her toe. “Yep, he’s out. I don’t think he heard you Kalika.”   “Good. Then that means its all my idea. More money for me.”   “Fat chance,” Goku muttered. “His stuff is my stuff now. If you wanna deal, you talk to me.”   “20/80?”   “Deal!”   “Oh Goku.” The two older women groaned.   “What?! I get the 80 right?”   Kalika grinned wider.   “Maybe we should get Geta off the floor. He looks a little uncomfortable.” The pregnant male said thoughtfully.   “Well, I ain’t picking him up.” Bulma said crossing her arms.   Kalika only grinner wider; it was starting to get just the tad bit annoying, not to mention creepy. ChiChi just stared back at him in non-concern.  

Sigh

  “And as your doctor, Goku, I’ll have to advise you not to lift heavy, stupid things.” Bulma added.   Kalika snorted with laughter and slid off the exam table.   “C’mon Kaki.” She said as she strutted out the door. “It’s time I introduce you to one of my favorite snacks. Ya like cheese puffs?”   “It’s only my second favoritest food!” Goku said happily as he took off behind her.   “Really? What’s your first?”   “Peanut butter of course.”   A grin. “Oh, we’ve got to spend more time together big guy.”         & nbsp; Author’s Note: I’m not sure I like the ending of this chapter but hey at least it’s done. Shrugs