Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ The We-Must-Be-Out-of-Our-Tiny-Minds Road Trip ❯ Free the Goats! No wait, They're a Bit Demented... ( Chapter 5 )

Hey everyone! As I type this, it's been five hours since I typed the last chapter. So no matter when I get it up, I think I deserve a miniscule amount of praise for trying!

Heero: *Rolls his eyes* Not really. It doesn't make up for the lost months. You can never take that back, TRF.

Well…so…so…so what? I'm trying!

Heero: When it comes down to you, trying will never be enough.

*Steals Chi-Chi's frying pan and whacks Heero with it* WHAT have I taught you about criticizing me slave muse boy?!

Heero: *holding the bump on his head* That it's a very bad idea?

Exactly! Now on to the chapter before I loose the will to write! On a side note, this will be the last chapter that you can submit requests to be in the fic for a while.

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After DA had managed to get herself up off the ground and stopped saying "Hi, I'm DA" to Vegeta the group continued on their way, determined not to draw attention to themselves.

"Excuse me," asked one employee walking up to them, "would you happen to know what happened at the Aquarium?"

J'dee gulped in a panicked way, "Aquarium? Know anything about it? Us? Nooooooo, of course not!"

The employee surveyed them, "But you're all wet…"

"We were just in the gardens and got wet in the sprinklers!" TRF responded quickly.

They were eyed suspiciously by the employee, "We haven't put the sprinklers on yet," he said with an obvious tone of 'I-don't-believe-you' in his voice.

"FINE!" cried S'rac getting down on his knees, "We saw it happen! We just managed to get out with our lives! We don't want to talk about it because WE'RE SO COMPLETELY TRAUMATIZED!" he sobbed.

"I-I'm sorry," the employee responded, not knowing quite what to say, "Did you happen to see who did it?" S'rac let out another mangled sob, still pretending to be traumatized.

"Weeell…" Bana began, "he had wild, red, evil eyes…"

"And…" DA continued, "long, pink loosely braided hair."

"He was wearing a white toga with sandals! Like he'd just robbed a costume store!" J'dee went on.

"He had club with him! That's what he used to break the glass!" TRF told the employee.

"And fangs! Don't forget his inch-long fangs!" Reikon exclaimed.

"Plus the saliva dripping from his mouth!" Alexandra said nodding her head vigorously.

"….I see…" muttered the employee, "So in other words, some escapee from an insane asylum."

"Y-yes," S'rac managed through his fake sobs.

"That has been very helpful, thank you," said the employee taking off.

J'dee sighed, "He was pretty cute looking all confused and suspicious…but not as cute as Yamcha of course!" she squealed giving him a full-body hug.

"Hey," said Gohan, suddenly looking up, "where are Kitami and RJ?"

"Missing your insane obsessed fans already Kaka-baka spawn one?" Vegeta asked with a hint of amusement in his voice.

"No…it's just that…I feel as though something horrible is about to happen to them." the demi-saiyan responded.

"What sort of horrible thing?" Inquired Mirai Trunks.

"Who cares?" snorted one of DA's muses, Inu-Yasha.

"They're my-sorta-friends, I think!" DA retorted, "Sit boy!" she commanded sharply, causing Inu-Yasha to plunge to the ground.

"Damn stupid girl," whined Inu-Yasha.

"Ah get up," responded DA's other muse, Familiar, "it doesn't hurt you that much."

"You try being in my position," mumbled Inu-Yasha.

Suddenly, a crowd of people stampeded past them, all headed towards the Desert Dome.

"Hey!" Bana cried, pulling one girl away from the crowd, "What's going on?"

"Don't you know?" the girl asked, then she saw Vegeta, "I-it's Vegeta! It's really VEGETA!" she screamed.

"Who are you?" Reikon asked.

"I'm T-Sama!" she said automatically.

"Wonderful," grumbled Bana, not exactly keen on the possibility of more competition for HER Skittles, "now what's going on over there?"

"Well," said T-Sama, "These two girls are about to jump from the Desert Dome and the weirdest thing is-they're arguing about who Gohan is going to catch!"

Gohan groaned, "Not them…guess I have to go get both of them."

"You'll do nothing of the sort, Gohan!" shouted Chi-Chi, who had mysteriously just arrived with Goku, Yajirobe, and the mushroom headed guys from the other world tournament in tow, "We will leave that up to Yajirobe and the mushroom guy!"

"But why?" asked Reikon.

"Because these are two of those girls' least favorite characters! That'll teach them!" Chi-Chi cried laughing evilly, "Go now men!" she shrilly commanded. The two took off towards the now-descending girls and rescued them.

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After that whole thing had been sorted out and Kitami and RJ had been whacked by Chi-Chi's Frying Pan of Terror and Doom™ everyone walked towards the petting zoo because there was a place that sold ice cream near it.

"Really?" asked T-Sama, "Trunks's Real Fan?"

"NO!" screeched TRF, "I mean sure, that's what it stood for in "Do It Yourself" but that was just for the convenience of keeping my name! I was once a Trunks fan, it is true, but my name has always stood for just ONE THING! Do you all know what that one thing is?!" she ranted, met with blank-eyed stares she continued on, "IT STANDS FOR TEAM ROCKET FAN!!! FOOLS!!! INCOMPHETANTS!! BAKAS!"

"You could've just told us earlier," commented J'dee.

"BUT YOU WOULD HAVE NEVER LISTENED!" she sighed dramatically, "NOBODY EVER LISTENS TO ME!"

Alexandra glanced over at TRF, "I'm sorry, did you just say something?"

"SEE?! SEE HOW RIGHT I AM?!" TRF whined.

"I can't hear you, speak up a little," Heero said with a sly smirk on his face.

"Team Rocket? As in Pokemon Team Rocket?" asked RJ, nose wrinkled in disgust, "Why would you be THEIR fan?'

"Because I am! James was my first anime obsession! Do you even know how remotely important a first anime obsession is? I can't just dump my first anime obsession! It would not be even remotely right!" TRF ranted, "In fact, I wish that they'd be here right now just so you could see why they're so completely lovable!" But alas, as TRF had awakened magical properties earlier by banging her head against her computer desk, Team Rocket turned up on the spot, but not just Jessie, James and Meowth. Since TRF hadn't specified which TR members she wanted Butch, Cassidy, Mondo, Domino, Giovanni, Zanna, Rion, Bashou, Buson, Vicious, and Professor Nanaba appeared as well.

"Dude! Now look what you did! But the blue-haired one does have a pretty cute butt…nothing to rival Skittles's of course, but a nice butt nonetheless," Bana commented.

At this James began to blush a bit, before Jessie whacked him on the head with her paper fan.

"No, no…" grumbled RJ, wanting to cling on to Gohan but not daring to because of Chi-Chi's ever-watchful eyes.

James and Inu-Yasha suddenly eyed each other, shifting, not sure exactly how to act around each other, James seemed moderately scared and Inu-Yasha seemed moderately angered by whatever he was thinking of that had James in it.

"What's with them?" asked J'dee.

"They've been acting that way towards each other since I began my newest work-and Inu-Yasha/Pokemon cross-over that I like to call "Brave Hearts in a Twisted Universe"."

"Crossover with Pokemon? EVIL!" Screeched RJ loudly enough for people to begin staring at them. An ordinary woman walked up to them and patted RJ on the shoulder.

"Now, now dear, I'm sure whatever it is can't be that bad," she assured.

"But it is! Oh but it is!" RJ sobbed.

"In most ways I'm inclined to agree!" Bana…er…agreed.

"You're supposed to support me!" wailed TRF, "I know you don't like the show but that doesn't mean you have go and strike out against a friend who likes it!" TRF ran over to the petting zoo's goat pen and opened it widely so all the goats could escape, "Get them my pretties!" she cackled.

"You think goats are pretty?" asked S'rac in a moderately disturbed tone of voice.

"I think it was just sarcasm. She's trying to be the wicked witch of whoever from the Wizard of OZ," J'dee responded.

"Wicked witch of whoever? I thought it was the Wicked Witch of the West?" asked Alexandra is a slightly puzzled tone.

"Wow!" cried T-Sama, "I've always wanted to ride a rampaging goat!" she squealed, then ran over to one of the larger ones and jumped on top of it, "Geddyup goatie!"

The woman who has previously been comforting RJ was starting to regret that decision now, as there were goats surrounding her, hysterical teens of either side of her, and a bunch of people who looked rather…animated, or two-dimensional was it?

DA looked around and pretended to give a frightened yelp, "Oh Skittles-Sama!" she cried, "PROTECT ME!" she yelled jumping onto his right side.

Reikon smiled upon seeing DA's actions, "Oh Piccolo-Sama!" she started, "Pro-"

"No," Piccolo stated blatantly, "do I really appear that stupid to you average humans?"

"Not really. We just have really strange fantasies that lead us to have high, high hope," Reikon stated.

"How comforting," grumbled Piccolo sarcastically, because of that a green liquid began to drip off of him.

Reikon gasped, "Is something wrong Piccolo?"

"No, no, nothing's wrong with him," J'dee assured Reikon, "he's just dripping sarcasm. I've seen it before," she added knowledgably.

"Great, I'm dripping sarcasm," Piccolo muttered, then realized he'd just been sarcastic once again by the seemingly gleeful way the liquids pouring from him sped up.

Bana, upon spotting DA clinging to Vegeta gave a large gasp and ran through the crowd of goats and screaming people before she climbed onto Vegeta's left side (Quorky with her) and gave him her widest, most sincere smile. He, not surprisingly, scowled in return and decided to take to the air before another fan could jump him.

"Vegeta!" screeched Bulma, "Come down here and help me before you help those…things-er, girls-or whatever they prefer to be called!"

"Don't do it!" whispered Bana.

"She's trying to seduce you to the dark side!" DA added.

Vegeta rolled his eyes at this and helped Bulma up, giving her a special spot on his shoulder.

"That isn't fair Skittles!" Bana protested.

"I could shake you off right now," Vegeta remarked idly.

"Uh…" DA looked down to see Bashou from Team Rocket being butted 10 feet in the air by a foaming ram, "that's ok."

Inu-Yasha slashed a few goats through with his Tetsuiga and looked at them hungrily, "I'm gonna have real dinner tonight."

DA gasped, "You hurt those innocent goats?! SIT BOY!" and Inu-Yasha went plummeting into the ground.

"Worry not fellow adventurers, we're in luck," TRF reported to J'dee, S'rac, Heero, and the Rocketeers who happened to the closest to her (Including Bashou and his extremely sore bottom), "Juunana express is flying today!" she squealed in typical fangirl fashion climbing onto Juunanagou's shoulder much to his disdain.

"So is Yammie," J'dee reported glomping Yamcha in another action typical of fangirls.

"Can you fly, Kuno?" S'rac asked.

Kuno looked at him as though he were insane, "If I had been able to don't you think I would have used it to my advantage to beat Ranma?"

"Good point," S'rac admitted gloomily, "but I bet you can jump pretty high, right?"

"Obviously, the great Tatewaki Kuno can jump high," Kuno responded sounding, albeit, a bit insulted.

"Then…could you jump us to a place out of the reach of goats?"

"If you have not noticed like I, the great Tatewaki Kuno, have we are surrounded for half a mile or so. Besides, I'm supposed to be the comical relief for now so I cannot get out of situations easily."

"Another good point," S'rac mumbled, "could you murder the author and take over?" he asked perkily.

"No, alas, then the author's ghost would come back and force me to put everyone in pink tutus and extremely tight underwear that would ride up our bottoms like nothing in the history of tight underwear. It happens to every character who murders the author and takes over."

Upon hearing this Jessie whipped around facing S'rac with a large, murderous glare, "I DARE you to try it!" she snapped, fingers wrapped around a large frying pan which even Chi-Chi stared at with utmost respect.

"Never mind. Drop that idea completely," S'rac told everyone rather quickly.

~*~

Well, yet again our little heroes(?) escaped utter destruction and continued on their merry way through the zoo.

"I'm not sure staying in here any longer would be a very smart idea," Kitami remarked, "I mean, next thing we know we're going to let out a pride of lions on the poor innocent zoo folk."

"Good point. You know, it's getting very repetitive for me to say that?" S'rac asked the all-mighty authoress who also happened to be the smartest, most beautiful, most athletic (Haha, that's a good one.), most talented authoress in the universe, she was also told that she was good at self-flattery because she was really only a bit above average in smartness, didn't look horrible but wasn't a beauty, had virtually no real athletic talent, and was only talented at the world's various arts. In other words, just another average computer geek who managed to accomplish a new chapter for her fanfic.

"You dare question the almighty authoress?!" My voice boomed over the zoo's loudspeakers. The next thing S'rac knew, he was chained to chair with a television in front of it, the TV had Barney on.

"NOOOOOOOOO!!!" Screamed S'rac, "I'll be a good little pawn in this plotless fanfic, I swear I will!" he pleaded.

Since the almighty authoress was naturally, as she was perfect, a very merciful person she unchained S'rac and made the TV vanish. She also realized this entire part of was virtually meaningless so she conferred with her staff (consisting of annoying little sister) and decided it was time to end the chapter.

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Whew! sorry this actually took me until January 11 to finish but, ya know, whatcha gonna do about it? I also think that this was my longest chapter yet (8 pages, usually it's only half that, yeah I know, a bit pathetic). I'd like to receive a bit of CC (constructive criticism) from people though. As you know, you're your own worst judge and I'd like to improve my writing.

Heero: Making an effort to improve something? That's a first!

*Whaps Heero* Shaddup!